What Is The “Almond Mom”?

moms be like “no I don’t have a eating disorder😜” and then eat a singular yogurt and a handful of almonds for the entire day.

— -_- (@quenblackwell) June 26, 2020

“The almond mom title represents a parent who has rigid or restrictive behaviors around food, often compensating after eating, making comments about their own or other people’s bodies, using mortality language to talk about food: ‘good’ ‘bad’ ‘guilty,’” said Brenna O'Malley, RD and owner of virtual private practice The Wellful in San Francisco.

The term ‘almond mom’ was birthed by the internet after a clip of Yolanda Hadid (yep, Gigi and Bella Hadid’s mother) on The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills resurfaced and went viral. In the video, Yolanda orders a distressed Gigi to “have a couple of almonds, and chew them really well.” Though context oftentimes gets lost through internet reshares (Gigi was allegedly coming off a detox regimen and couldn’t actually eat real food), the clip struck a chord with *a lot* of users – mostly young women – who grew up with their mom telling them to “just eat some almonds” whenever they were hungry.

@tyler.benderr Follow me or I’ll eat whole milk #almondmom #almondmoms #halfanalmondaday #sketchcomedy #comedyskit ♬ Salsa Music - HitsLab

An almond mom is obsessed withhealthy eating and is immersed in diet culture with no breaks. She’s abnormally fixated on portion sizes and getting enough veggies and fruits in, even when it’s Halloween or Christmas. She definitely buys into the gimmicks of juice cleanses and HerbaLife. The almond mom, put transparently, has disordered views about food and nutrition. She likely has good intentions at heart, but can end up pushing a detrimental mentality surrounding food onto her kids – more specifically, daughters.

“If as a young kid or teen, you are observing your caregiver obsess or carefully control their own body, it strengthens the message that food is something to be vigilantly monitored, measured and restricted,” said O’Malley. “Many of my clients cite watching their own moms diet or comment on their body as some of their earliest dieting memories for themselves.”

@reneemarconi

Everyone knows my house has the worst snacks

♬ Elevator Music - Bohoman

For daughters who’ve already felt intense pressures to fit into a mold made up by society, the almond mom can only make measures worse. Kids will always look up to their parents and adopt the behaviors shown to them, good or bad.

The almond mom’s interest in healthy eating and nutrition – though it can be masked as a good thing – is simply not. Instead, it’s rooted in poor body image and fatphobia. But that’s not entirely her fault. For years, women have been told they should be skinny, but not too skinny. Muscular, but not too muscular. (Cue America Ferrera’s Barbie monologue) Curvy in *only* the right places. The list goes on and on, and challenging that societal expectation is a lot harder than conforming to it – which is why the almond mom is… the way she is.

“The downside of a trend like this is that like most things online, it doesn’t leave room for nuance to discuss that almond moms are also struggling themselves, and probably had their own almond mom or experiences that led them to these behaviors,” said O’Malley. “Many of my clients who are moms share that their worst fear is passing on disordered eating patterns to their daughters or children – I don’t think anyone wants to do that.”

Although a running online joke, the almond mom trend tackles serious issues surrounding eating disorders, body dysmorphia, self-confidence, and more. It’s opened up a dialogue between mothers and daughters to explore how daughters were raised, and how mothers raised them. These things are important to talk about, because soon enough, those daughters will have daughters – and they want to break the generational cycle of almond moms.

If you’ve been affected by the almond mom mentality, O’Malley suggests that visualizing what you hope your relationship with food to look like can be a helpful first step in working toward healthy eating habits.

“The way I think about healthy eating habits is that someone is able to make choices around food that feel good to them, are sustainable, promote their health, give them enough energy throughout the day and allow for food to be enjoyable and fun,” said O’Mallet. “Constantly calculating how many calories they have ‘left’ in their day, or are always critiquing their body is exhausting. Shame is not an effective motivator for change or for adopting health behaviors.”

She also encourages to ask yourself: how much of your daily energy and brainspace is dedicated to making choices around food, exercise or dieting? Do you find yourself skipping social events to accommodate your diet patterns? Does a change in routine feel really unsettling or intolerable? If the answer’s yes, it can be a sign that your relationship with food is causing additional stress, and could be more flexible.