10 Things to Tell Your S.O. More Often in 2018

For many of us, 2017 was a doozy, but we here at Brit + Co are ready to hit refresh in 2018! Follow our Hit Refresh series through January for new ideas, hacks, and skills that will help you achieve (and maintain!) those New Year’s resolutions.

We all deserve to give 2018 our best, and if you think about it, that’s pretty much the whole reason any of us make a New Year’s resolution. Whether you’re resolving to get healthier or to prioritize self care or to finesse that oh-so-delicate work-life balance, the result of being successful at any of these endeavors is that you’ll be a better, more balanced version of you in the 12 months ahead.

Our significant others also deserve our best in the coming year, and the good news is that you don’t need to make a total personal transformation or immediately sign up for relationship therapy to give that to them (though we’re very pro-therapy!). Changing the way you speak to your partner will go a long way toward making your relationship as strong as it can be in 2018, so consider saying these 10 things to your S.O. a bit more frequently moving forward.

1. “I’m sorry.” Arguments come and go, but strong relationships are tough enough to withstand the stress of an inevitable fight now and then. It’s never easy to be the first one to apologize, but sometimes, being the one to take on that role is the best way to get you and bae back on track. Swallow your pride and apologize when an apology is warranted. We’re pretty confident you won’t regret it.

2. “Is there anything I can do for you today?” In the rush of everyday life, we rarely have a moment to pause and consider how we can be of service to other people — even the people we love the most. Show your partner that they’re top of mind for you by offering to help them on a day when you have a little extra free time. Whether they ask you to pick up their dry cleaning or simply lend a listening ear after they’ve had a rough afternoon at the office, it’s the fact that you asked that counts.

3. “Are you okay?” And, no, we’re not talking about the passive aggressive, pre-argument form of this question (you know exactly what we’re talking about). We’re talkin’ genuine concern here! If your significant other seems slightly off their game, you should be the first one to make sure that there isn’t something wrong.

4. “I really appreciate that you ________.” In 2018, make a regular practice of demonstrating gratitude — of the specific variety — for the things your partner does and the kind of person he or she is. Did you appreciate the way your sweetie handled a conversation that could have been tense? Did they make you laugh especially hysterically? Did they go out of their way to make sure you had the ingredients necessary to make your mom’s birthday cake? Tell them what it meant to you!

5. “I’m going to leave my phone at home while we’re at dinner.” We all could use a little more time away from our phones, and date night is a great place to start. Show your partner they’re your number-one priority when you’ve planned quality time together, and they may even follow suit.

6. “My treat!” Money can sour pretty much any relationship, and while there should never be an expectation that one partner should take full financial responsibility for the other, it’s nice for both parties to pick up the check every once in a while. Offer to cover your S.O.’s coffee, or hand your credit card to the cashier next time bae steps up to buy a new shirt. If you and your partner already share finances, you can still practice this one. After all, it’s the gesture that really matters.

7. “Should we call and invite your friend?” Never underestimate how much it will mean to your significant other for you to proactively include one of their friends in an activity or outing you’re planning. Extending this kind of invitation shows that you’re making an effort to create space in your own life for the things that are important to your other half.

8. “Tell me something I don’t know about you.” Even people who have been coupled up for decades can find new things to discover about their partners. See how many things you can share about yourself that might genuinely surprise your S.O. — and show them how thankful you are that they continue to be open to sharing new things with you too.

9. “You’re really killin’ it at work.” It’s nice to get positive feedback from the boss, but we all know that encouragement is best served directly from someone who means a lot to us personally. Don’t be afraid to cheer your S.O.’s efforts on the job — even if you don’t feel totally qualified to do it. Sometimes, a few positive words is all it takes to give someone a much-needed boost. Imagine how your partner’s career will soar in the new year with you as a more active cheerleader!

10. “Do you want some time alone?” Togetherness is obviously a key part of a relationship, but so is respecting each other’s space! Creating space for your partner to enjoy some alone time isn’t a recipe for a breakup — in fact, it could be seriously healthy for both of you. If you sense that your significant other is having a hard day, or if you’re struggling to communicate, consider taking this route.

What do you want to hear from your significant other more often in the new year? Tweet us @BritandCo!

(Photo via Getty)

Sometimes we're looking for love in all the wrong places — and sometimes we're just looking for love in all the wrong ways. That's where your rising sign can come in. In this week's Ask An Astrologer column with Lumi Pelinku, our reader feels like they just can't find their footing romantically. Luckily, Lumi has the best relationship advice — and it all starts with your rising sign! Here's how you can use your own rising sign to level up your romantic life!

Juan Pablo Serrano

Dear Lumi: Will I ever be worthy of being loved romantically? I have never been in a relationship, and I’m scared I will never be. I have so much love to give, but I don’t think I’ll ever have the chance to show it.

Bean, Illinois

  • Sun sign: Virgo
  • Rising sign: Cancer
  • Moon sign: Gemini

Yuri Manei

Dear Virgo: I understand where you're coming from, as many people feel this way these days. Here’s a little personal story from my journey: In my early 20s, I was pretty inexperienced in love and pressured by societal expectations to settle down by 30. Sigh...

I went to great lengths to attract a partner, even dabbling in spells and misleading manifestation techniques. Please tread carefully if you're trying this. Instead of finding true love, I drew a series of “ghosts” and situationships. I felt I had so much love to offer, but it all led to emptiness and eventually a toxic relationship with someone I thought was my soulmate, but turned out to be my karmic partner. There’s more to this story, but let’s save it for another time.

The end of that relationship led me to discover the essence of self-love and self-acceptance, eventually stepping into my own worth. Astrology has become a guiding light for me in that regard — and can be for you, too.

​Let’s Talk About Your Rising Sign & How It Defines Your Relationship Standards

Luke Miller

In astrology, examining your rising sign can offer profound insights. With Cancer rising, your soul yearns for deep, emotional connections. Creating a biological or soul family may bring you joy and fulfillment. Opposite Cancer is Capricorn, which governs the 7th house of your birth chart — the area that reveals the type of partners you need and what you should embody to feel complete, whether you’re with someone or not. A Capricorn-ruled 7th house suggests that a structured, secure, and straightforward partner will align with your needs. If you find yourself in a relationship that feels stagnant or uncertain from the start, it’s a sign that you’re not embodying Capricorn’s qualities, and it might be time to move on.

Arina Krasnikova

Your natural tendency to give and care deeply for others stems from a place of genuine concern and desire to ensure everyone’s well-being. However, it’s crucial for you to seek security from within. Feeling at home in your skin and living in the moment are great starting points.

Avoid individuals who offer unrequited love or broken promises. You may have an intuitive sense that you might overlook — trust it. By becoming more aware of your physical and emotional responses to others, you can discern between genuine connections and energy-draining situations. Establishing a practice of quiet reflection and observation can facilitate understanding the root of your heightened emotions.

Cliff Booth

The core message here is to build security within yourself and extend grace and understanding to yourself throughout your journey. It’s perfectly okay to be single right now; you're worthy of attracting a partner who will cherish all of you. To find the love of your life, you must first love yourself — not in a self-centered way, but by honoring your own needs and boundaries. Saying no to situations and people not aligning with your sensitive soul will make you stronger than you realize. The Universe will respond with an endearing relationship by practicing this because you’ve learned to honor yourself.

With Love and Stars,

Lumi

​How Your Rising Sign Cultivates Self-Acceptance and Attracts the Love You Need

Alexander Mass

Like an outfit, your rising sign showcases your personality, identity, and perception of the world. What if I tell you that the rising sign can also attract the love you need in your journey? Think of your rising sign as your energy and how you embody it. It's the mirror we carry, and by our energy, we can keep it clean and pristine or murky and distorted. Sometimes, we cannot stand what we see in ourselves, and that channeled energy emanates outward, creating distortion-filled experiences. When this happens, you lose your 'main character' energy, which results in you leaving your life to chance rather than writing your chapters. When you embody complete self-acceptance and happiness within yourself, these are the key ingredients in powering up your rising sign and your 7th house.

As you begin to feel at peace, love, and harmony to the best of your ability, this will attract what you desire in your life and in love. The world will respond and reflect back all that we project. It’s that simple. Our rising sign is responsible for this active energy, and learning how to master it, will be the key to help you understand the nature of your personality while also attracting your dreams. The ascendant is the portal of your experiences, good and bad. Now that we understand the gist of the rising sign, let's explore your rising sign and how you can tap into your main character energy.

​Love Alchemy: How Your Rising Sign Shapes Relationships

Brit + Co

Aries Rising

Aries Rising radiates a bold, adventurous energy, often attracting equally spirited partners. To attract the love of their life, they should embrace their assertiveness and passion. By channeling the competitive energy of their 7th house (Libra), they can cultivate harmony in relationships without sacrificing their individuality. Self-acceptance means recognizing their fierce independence while being open to collaboration and compromise. The dynamic energy of Mars empowers them to attract a partner who admires their fiery spirit yet values partnership.

Brit + Co

Taurus Rising

Grounded and sensual, Taurus Rising can attract lasting love through their nurturing nature. Their 7th house energy in Scorpio encourages depth and intensity in relationships. To manifest their ideal partner, Taurus Rising must embrace their inner beauty and the pleasure of self-care. By embodying their desire for stability and security, they can project an aura of comfort and reliability, making them irresistible to those seeking genuine connections. Venus, their ruling planet, enhances their allure, helping them draw the right kind of love.

Brit + Co

Gemini Rising

With a quick wit and charm, Gemini Rising attracts partners through intellectual stimulation. Their 7th house in Sagittarius encourages exploration and adventure. To attract their soulmate, they should openly embrace their duality and communicate their needs and desires. Their self-acceptance journey involves acknowledging their inquisitiveness while finding ways to ground themselves in relationships. Mercury, their ruling planet, sharpens their communication skills, enabling them to draw in a partner who shares their passion for life and learning.

Brit + Co

Cancer Rising

Cancer Rising embodies warmth and nurturing energy, making them deeply appealing to potential partners. Their 7th house in Capricorn requires a balance between emotional depth and practical commitment. To attract a lasting love, Cancer Rising should accept their need for security while being open to vulnerability. Utilizing their emotional intelligence to discern their connections creates a safe space for love to flourish. The Moon, their ruling planet, enhances their intuition and empathy, helping them attract a partner who values their nurturing nature and ambition.

Brit + Co

Leo Rising

Confident and charismatic, Leo Rising draws people in with their radiant energy. Their 7th house in Aquarius encourages them to seek uniqueness in relationships. To draw in the love they need, Leo Rising must embody self-love while giving space for individuality. By embracing their creativity and leading with generosity, the Sun, their ruling planet, inspires them to attract a partner who appreciates their vibrant spirit and shares their vision for a progressive, loving partnership.

Brit + Co

Virgo Rising

Practical and detail-oriented, Virgo Rising has a unique charm that attracts partners seeking stability and support. Their 7th house in Pisces invites them to explore relationships' emotional and spiritual aspects. Virgo Rising should love their imperfections and the beauty of vulnerability to attract an epic partnership. By cultivating self-acceptance and finding joy in the little things, Mercury, their ruling planet, helps them draw in a partner who appreciates their grounded nature while encouraging emotional exploration.

Brit + Co

Libra Rising

Charming and harmonious, Libra Rising attracts partners through their innate ability to create beauty and balance. Their 7th house in Aries prompts them to be more assertive in love. Libra Rising must embrace the desire for partnership to attract their ideal partner while also recognizing the importance of self-identity. Being bold in expressing their needs will ignite their main character energy, as Venus, their ruling planet, empowers them to draw in a partner who values connection and independence.

Brit + Co

Scorpio Rising

Intense and magnetic, Scorpio Rising naturally attracts people with their enigmatic presence. Their 7th house in Taurus urges them to seek relationship stability and loyalty. Scorpio Rising should tap into their emotional depth and learn to communicate openly to attract the love they desire. Valuing their worth is vital to mastering their life path. By engaging in self-love and finding a balance between their passionate nature and a desire for security, Pluto and Mars, their ruling planets, will manifest in attracting a partner who appreciates their intensity and commitment.

Brit + Co

Sagittarius Rising

Adventurous and free-spirited, Sagittarius Rising attracts partners through their love of exploration and philosophy. Their 7th house in Gemini encourages communication and curiosity in relationships. To attract their ideal love, Sagittarius Rising has to tap into their quest for knowledge while remaining open to commitment. By cultivating self-worth and expressing their authentic self, Jupiter, their ruling planet, guides them in drawing in a partner who shares their passion for adventure and intellectual pursuits.

Brit + Co

Capricorn Rising

Disciplined and ambitious, Capricorn Rising manifests partnerships through their drive and determination. Their 7th house in Cancer encourages them to explore emotional depth in relationships. To attract lasting love, Capricorn Rising should tap into their nurturing side and allow themselves to be vulnerable. By practicing self-love while balancing their ambitions with emotional availability, Saturn, their ruling planet, aids them in attracting a partner who admires their strength while valuing emotional connection.

Brit + Co

Aquarius Rising

Innovative and independent, Aquarius Rising draws in partners with their unique perspectives and humanitarian spirit. Their 7th house in Leo invites them to ignite creativity and passion in relationships. Aquarius Rising must acknowledge their desire for freedom while recognizing the value of connection to attract the love they desire. By embodying their authentic and unique self, Uranus, their ruling planet, inspires them to draw in a partner who appreciates their individuality and shares their vision for a better world.

Brit + Co

Pisces Rising

Dreamy and compassionate, Pisces Rising attracts partners through their empathetic and intuitive nature. Their 7th house in Virgo encourages them to seek practicality and service in relationships. To attract true love, it's vital for Pisces Rising to embrace their sensitivity while grounding themselves in reality. By practicing self-love and setting healthy boundaries, Neptune and Jupiter, their ruling planets, will manifest a partner who appreciates their depth and aligns with their desire for meaningful connections.

Katerina Holmes

Understanding your rising sign can be a powerful tool for self-discovery and personal growth. Exploring your ascendant's unique traits and energies will help you get to know yourself and all its shades and how you navigate love and relationships. This awareness empowers you to embrace your authentic self and enables you to identify patterns that may hold you back. As you align with your rising sign's essence and ruling planet, you can cultivate more happiness and confidence, opening pathways to attract meaningful connections and experiences that resonate with your true essence. Embracing your rising sign invites you to step into your main character energy, allowing you to write your story with intention and authenticity.

Want to find out how astrology can be the guiding tool to self-acceptance and fulfillment? Click here and claim your copy of Lumi's Beginner's Astrology Book.

For more astrology advice, be sure to Ask Lumi for advice, and follow the conversation on Facebook!

I am the opposite of a casual Reputation fan. Four of my five most-listened-to songs on Spotify (like, of all time) are from the 2017 album, I wore a Rep-inspired outfit to my Eras Tour show, and I am constantly analyzing (and talking about) its symbolism. I stand by the fact that this album, as misunderstood as it is, is actually the key to understanding Taylor Swift herself, which is why its rerelease is the one I've been most looking forward to. With TikTok, X (formerly Twitter), and Reddit, it feels like there's a new theory every day about when we'll get Reputation (Taylor's Version), but I'm pretty sure Taylor's been telling us the announcement date for awhile.

What is the new Reputation bodysuit?

Aldara Zarraoa/Getty Images for TAS Rights Management

During the Eras Tour in Miami, Taylor Swift finally debuted a new Reputation bodysuit after 131 shows — this time with golden snakes all over it instead of red ones, like the original suit pictured here. And, as you can imagine, fans lost their minds. "I couldn’t tell you anything about the Roman Empire but I can tell you every detail about the time Taylor Swift wore a new Reputation bodysuit and became mother nature on October 18th, 2024," one viral tweet says about the costume change (and the rainy concert).

The new Reputation bodysuit is designed by Roberto Cavalli, and features a cobra across Taylor's chest, poised to attack. (And Reputation-era fan will remember Taylor's tour companion, Karyn). In reclaiming her discography, Taylor is pulling no punches, giving us insight into her past like we've never had before. One of my favorite comments about the new bodysuit comes on @carolinemcknz's TikTok, and points out that "the [gold] ones seem more aggressive and the red are passive," because in reclaiming her narrative, Taylor is anything but passive. And the fact it's now gold serves as a major nod to lyrics like "deep blue but you painted me golden" on "Dancing With Our Hands Tied."

Taylor Swift doesn't usually comment on fan theories, but she did speak on the reaction to the bodysuit and the other new costumes. "I got some new outfits, and it’s always nice when the crowd notices that 😁," she said on Instagram. "You guys are just the best. Thank you to everyone who came and everyone who followed along online."

Big Machine Records

Swifties have been waiting for Taylor to change up the bodysuit since she started the Eras Tour in March 2023 — and we're all hoping it means a Reputation (Taylor's Version) announcement is in our near future.

But, in addition to the color change, the biggest detail that caught the internet's attention was that one of the snakes coiled on Taylor's back looks like a 2. After the Tortured Poets Department double album, and the rumors Taylor will release Taylor Swift (TV) and Reputation (TV) at the same time, could we be getting another double drop? Anything is possible.

The biggest theory following Midnights (and the cappuccino theory — see below) was that Taylor Swift would release Reputation (TV) in February. And with the potential "2" on her bodysuit, and the fact the Eras Tour will end in December, I wouldn't be surprised if we got a Reputation (Taylor's Version) announcement for February 2025.

When is Taylor Swift releasing Reputation (Taylor's Version)?

Source Pictures & Taylor Swift Productions

The cappuccino Easter egg from the "Karma" music video.

We don't have an official Reputation (Taylor's Version) release date yet, but all signs were originally pointing to an announcement on February 16, 2024. When the music video for "Karma" from Midnights came out, featuring a shot of Taylor holding a cappuccino, Swifties clocked that the blue nail (which represents 1989 (Taylor's Version)) lines up with the 8 on the clock, and the black nail lines up with the 2. Taylor ended up announcing 1989 TV on August 9 — and then announced The Tortured Poets Department(also known as TS11) at the 2024 Grammys in February!

The latest theory revolves around an August 20 announcement and September 13 drop. After Taylor was spotted in a semi-green 'fit with a Vivienne Westwood Tuesday bag, fans began wondering if it was a clue for a Tuesday album announcement. The last Tuesday show in London is Tuesday, August 20, which is also the last show until October. This would be the perfect amount of time for Taylor to have announced the album and to drop it on September 13, which is the second to last Friday the 13th of the year!

The other Friday the 13th is December 13, which is Taylor Swift's birthday. The popstar had the date front and center in her Tortured Poets Department pop-up installation. Since the date falls on a Friday, it's the perfect day to drop some new music...If you ask me, that's when we're getting Taylor Swift (Taylor's Version) — because there is literally no better combo than Taylor's birthday, Friday the 13th, and Taylor taking her name back.

Are there any other clues that Reputation (Taylor's Version) will come out next?

Amy Sussman/Getty Images

Taylor Swift attends the 81st Annual Golden Globe Awards at The Beverly Hilton on January 07, 2024 in Beverly Hills, California.

At her first NFL appearance of 2024, for the KC Chiefs' season opener on Thursday September 5, Taylor Swift wore a denim corset and shorts set with bold, thigh-high red boots. Fans immediately made the connection between this 'fit and what Taylor wears in the "Look What You Made Me Do" music video. This is like a wink from Taylor — I don't think she's giving us direct clues about Reputation (Taylor's Version), but it feels like a reminder that the album is still on its way!

Taylor also showed up to the 81st Golden Globe Awards in an all green ensemble, which is already so Reputation-coded to begin with. However, fans noticed one teeeeeeeny tiny detail about her look that really leans into all the theories that Rep (TV) is next. If you zoom in on her rings, one of them is a snake that's wrapped around her finger. 🐍

And after Taylor Swift released a video teasing her new album(TTPD), Swifties are analyzing all the snakeskin patterns (on the curtains, the floor, and the green couch), as well as the dark visuals. While the video moves from the dark room to a bright one for TTPD, I'm convinced we'll be returning — or continuing down the hallway where you can see a dark picture frame waiting for us...

A recent Disney+ ad that paired the Eras Tour film and Disney Pixar's Cars went viral on Twitter because its tagline is "Getaway Car," one of the most beloved songs on Reputation (Taylor's Version)! No matter when the album drops, having Taylor Swift's final two re-recordings be her name and her reputation is literally so iconic and I can't wait to listen.

What Taylor Swift songs are on Reputation (Taylor's Version)?

Kevin Winter/Getty Images for TAS Rights Management

Taylor Swift during the Eras Tour Reputation set.

We know that, based on previous re-recordings, Reputation (Taylor's Version) will have the original tracklist and an unknown number of vault tracks that Taylor wrote ahead of the Reputation era. PEOPLE also confirmed we'll be able to hear Taylor Swift's "Look What You Made Me Do (Taylor's Version)" in the new docuseries for the New England Patriots! You can also hear a snippet in the trailer for Ashley Benson's Wilderness ;). Simone Biles also used "Ready For It?" in her Olympics floor routine!

Here's what you can expect on Taylor Swift's Reputation (Taylor's Version). I'm really hoping the vault tracks include "I Don't Want To Live Forever"!

  1. "Ready For It? (Taylor's Version)"
  2. "End Game (Taylor's Version)"
  3. "I Did Something Bad (Taylor's Version)"
  4. "Don't Blame Me (Taylor's Version)"
  5. "Delicate (Taylor's Version)"
  6. "Look What You Made Me Do (Taylor's Version)"
  7. "So It Goes... (Taylor's Version)"
  8. "Gorgeous (Taylor's Version)"
  9. "Getaway Car (Taylor's Version)"
  10. "King Of My Heart (Taylor's Version)"
  11. "Dancing With Our Hands Tied (Taylor's Version)"
  12. "Dress (Taylor's Version)"
  13. "This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things (Taylor's Version)"
  14. "Call It What You Want (Taylor's Version)"
  15. "New Year's Day (Taylor's Version)"

What is Taylor Swift wearing to Grammys 2024?

Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images for The Recording Academy

Taylor Swift ahead of announcing The Tortured Poets Department.

Taylor Swift showed up to the 2024 Grammys in a sculptural white gown from Schiaparelli Couture. I love how Taylor has hopped on the corset trend. This is my favorite neckline in recent years! Even though the dress is white instead of black or green — and ended up going along with the Tortured Poets Department (or TS 11) announcement — I think it could still be a Reputation (Taylor's Version) Easter egg.

White is, of course, the opposite of black, so I think it's a more unexpected reference to the album, with black accessories like gloves, shoes, and jewelry being a direct nod. Plus, the watch necklace pays homage to Midnights! At the 2022 VMAs, Taylor wore another Reputation-coded outfit before she announced Midnights, so it could be a pattern.

Is there gonna be a Reputation Taylor's Version?

Paul Kane/Getty Images

Taylor Swift performs at Optus Stadium on October 19, 2018 in Perth, Australia.

Yes, we're getting a Reputation (Taylor's Version)! Taylor Swift has been very vocal about the fact she's rerecording her first five albums. However, she's been less direct about the order or the release schedule, which is honestly more fun! The official Taylor Nation account added fuel to the fire when they posted a photo of Taylor rehearsing for The Eras Tour — because, like @nashs_mom on TikTok says, the pose doesn't match up with any of the songs.

While all the photos they've previously posted match up with numbers like "Enchanted" or "Illicit Affairs," the new pose seems to match up with "I Did Something Bad" (which is both the last Reputation surprise song left AND the perfect song to announce the rerecording).

What caused Taylor Swift to make Reputation?

Def Jam/UMG

Cover art for Kanye West's The Life Of Pablo, which features "Famous."

The primary catalyst for Taylor Swift's Reputation era was a phone call with Kanye West and Kim Kardashian. After Taylor said Kanye did not have her permission to say he "made that b-tch famous" in "Famous," a video leak from Kim seemed to show Taylor did actually give her permission (it was later revealed the video was edited, and Taylor gave her permission to be mentioned, NOT to be called a b-tch).

"#TaylorSwiftIsOverParty" began trending on Twitter, and everyone from the media to the general public began calling her a snake. So she disappeared from the public eye for over a year, and Reputation was born. The era was moody — and full of snake imagery. Taylor says in her TIME interview that the album came from "a goth-punk moment of female rage at being gaslit by an entire social structure," and told Rolling Stone in 2019 that Reputation was a "metaphor" and her "playing a character."

How old was Taylor Swift when she wrote Reputation?

Christopher Polk/Getty Images for TAS

Charli XCX, Camila Cabello and Taylor Swift perform onstage during opening night of Taylor Swift's 2018 Reputation Stadium Tour at University of Phoenix Stadium on May 8, 2018 in Glendale, Arizona.

Taylor began writing Reputation in 2016, when she was 27. However, the stories she's telling go back farther than that since "Dancing With Our Hands Tied" talks about a relationship from when she was 25.

Is Reputation a love album?

Big Machine Records

Cover art for Taylor Swift's Reputation.

While Reputation is sassy, moody, and satirical, I stand by the idea that it's actually a love album at its core. While the general public talked most about "Ready for It?" and "Look What You Made Me Do," songs like "Delicate," "Call It What You Want," and "New Year's Day" are all about healing after the media turned against her. The message of the album is all about how she wants to spend the the ins and outs of life with people she loves, because they make the boring days beautiful, which is also the sentiment running throughout "Lover."

"I want your midnights, but I'll be cleaning up bottles with you on New Year's Day" and "We can leave the Christmas lights up 'til January" are the same!!

What are the Reputation Taylor's Version vault tracks?

Warner Bros. Entertainment

A Horcrux from Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows: Part I

While we don't have the tracklist for Reputation (Taylor's Version) yet, she did mention in her TIME interview that the vault tracks will be "fire."

"I’m collecting horcruxes,” she says of the rerecordings. “I’m collecting infinity stones. Gandalf’s voice is in my head every time I put out a new one. For me, it is a movie now.”

I'm going to be real honest, this is the line that sent me into a tailspin because the idea that Taylor loves stories like Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, and the MCU as much as I do is too much!! But it makes sense because after all, she IS a storyteller.

When was Reputation released?

Mark Metcalfe/Getty Images

Taylor Swift released the original Reputation on November 10, 2017.

What does Taylor's reputation era mean?

Kevin Winter/Getty Images for TAS

Taylor Swift's Reputation era came after the summer of 2016, and as we moved into the album release period of fall 2017. In literal terms, the era was marked by rarely posting on social media, avoiding the spotlight ahead of the Reputation tour, and not doing interviews.

But in a more vibey sense, your Reputation era can be summed up in a single quote from Taylor herself: "Be like a snake, only bite if someone steps on you." It's not exactly a revenge era, but it's also not being outright sweet all the time. It's protecting your inner circle — and fighting for your inner peace — but more than anything, it's standing up for yourself. We can definitely get behind that.

Do you think we'll get Reputation (Taylor's Version) in February 2024? Check out our Facebook for the latest Taylor Swift news and browse ourUltimate Taylor Swift Gift Guide!

This post has been updated.

We live in a "post your relationship so we know it's real" landscape, and I'd be lying if I said it hasn't made me wonder if there's a larger conversation to be had about it. Some people don't feel the need to post their romantic partner while others share their relationships in a way that rivals the best celebrity couples.

Everyone's different, but it's not not unheard of to question your partner's devotion if they're not posting you on Instagram. You may feel justified in your anger because "so and so" are always in cute pictures and videos together on social media — but are your feelings valid? The best person to answer this is licensed therapist Suzette Bray, LMFT. She has over 25 years of specializing in Dialectical Behavior Therapy, and she's seen this topic come up plenty of times during sessions with clients, so grab a pen and paper to take notes!

Why do people want to share their relationship status with others?

Afif Ramdhasuma

My sister used to ask me this question when I was in my 20's, and I always looked at her like she had two heads growing. I couldn't fathom the idea that people wouldn't want to talk about their relationship online because it felt like everyone was doing it. I mean, a study from Pew Research Center shows 8 in 10 people on social media see relationship posts, so it clearly wasn't outrageous to think it was normal.

But, that still doesn't answer why people are drawn to sharing cute little updates about their partner or relationship. Luckily, Bray has a good indication of what drives people to give others a sneak peek into their lives. "People share their relationship status for all kinds of reasons. Some want to mark their territory — nothing says 'back off' quite like a cute couple selfie! Others are just excited and proud of their partner and want to share the joy," she says. That stems from people's "need for a sense of belonging or to receive positive reinforcement from others," she adds.

But, this doesn't necessarily make people weird. It's just human nature that makes us act the way we do. "We as humans are just hard wired to seek connection, and broadcasting our connections, makes us feel more accepted and secure in our social lives."

Should couples have conversations about their social media expectations?

Katrin Bolovtsova

I don't care how hot you think someone is, you're going to have to learn how to communicate with them. It's true even if your chemistry is off-the-charts because healthy relationships don't fall out of the sky. They're built via honesty, respect, forgiveness, and other important factors.

Before assuming your partner is or isn't okay with you posting about your relationship, Bray is 100% convinced you should talk things through. "Social media is still in the wild west of relationship etiquette, and without discussions, assumptions about 'correct' behavior can run wild," she hints. For example, you could be happily posting about your partner only for someone to point out that they're not following you on social media.

"Some people are super private, while others practically live their lives online. Misunderstandings happen when expectations aren't laid out so talking about it can prevent messiness in the long run," Bray observes.

If two people have gone on a couple of dates, should one of them be upset if the other isn't publicly talking about them?

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So, you swiped right on Tinder or Bumble, and you had a few amazing dates with one of your matches. Before you start publicly declaring your love for them, Bray wants you to reconsider. "Hold on! It's just a few dates! Let’s pump the brakes. The early stages of dating is not the time to make grand social declarations," she declares. As someone who tried to 'date' people from Tinder, those first few dates aren't a guarantee that you've found the love of your life.

"Posting someone on social media can feel like a big step to some people so expecting that level of public commitment too soon might be too much pressure. If you’re already thinking, 'Why haven’t they posted about me yet?' after two dates, it might be a good time to check in with yourself about where those expectations are coming from," advises Bray.

I've recovered from my former, "Is he the one" obsession so also take it from me — see where things go first and then refer back to question #2!

Is it a red flag if someone doesn't post their partner on social media?

Budgeron Bach

It would be so much fun if we personally had Dustin Poynter, the flag guy, from TikTok helping point us in the right direction — but this is one of those things that errs on the subjective side. Though Bray doesn't feel it's necessarily healthier to keep your relationship private, she thinks "context matters." "Some people are just more private or feel weird about social media in general," she says.

But, that doesn't mean certain behaviors don't warrant a few eyebrow raises. She notes," If someone is super active on social—like posting about their dog’s morning routine and every cupcake they’ve ever had—but doesn't ever mention their partner, it could create a need for a deeper conversation." Before you feel justified about grilling your partner — as satisfactory as that may feel — take a second to breathe.

Bray would prefer you work to understand "why they don't post, rather than assuming your partner is keep you a secret." If you discover the latter to be true, follow your instincts and let that person go because you don't deserve that!

Do you think it's healthier for couples to keep certain aspects of their relationship private?

Fábio Carvalho

Everyone has a different view of what makes a romantic relationship healthy, so this is one of those things Bray says, "absolutely depends on the couple" because some "genuinely enjoy sharing their lives online." You've probably seen your share of couples who make cute content together whether they're married or not. I'd be lying if I said I don't specifically keep up with a few whose content makes me smile.

But, other couples may not be interested in sharing their relationship online because they "want to be private and keep the relationship free from the judgements or opinions of others," according to Bray. That's not to say they have something to hide, though. Instead, think of it as a personal preference.

"As long as both partners are on the same page and it’s not a source of tension, it’s all about finding the balance that works for them. If it starts to feel like a performance for likes rather than genuine connection, though, that’s where it can become problematic," Bray reminds.

How can someone bring up their partner's posting habits without sounding accusatory?

Timur Weber

You may feel eager about posting about your partner while they're less enthusiastic and this could make you feel upset. It's easy to jump to conclusions when you're already upset, but Bray feels "tone is everything." Ironically, she suggests something I've heard in therapy sessions and that's "to be curious, not confrontational." Hopefully this stopped you in your tracks if you were ready to give your partner a piece of your mind.

"You can say something like, 'Hey, I’ve noticed we haven’t shared much about each other on social media? What’s your take on sharing stuff about us online?' It’s important to frame it as a mutual exploration of rather than a demand for a public declaration," Bray points out.

What would you tell someone who wants to emulate couples who consistently post content together?

Vlada Karpovich

We've all seen couples who we think have the cutest relationship, even though we've never met them before. As much as you may admire a couple, Bray thinks it's a "slipper slope" if you want to try to recreate their online moments. "I’d encourage someone to focus more on what makes their own relationship feel fulfilling, rather than chasing #couplesgoals," she encourages.

However, this isn't a sign that you're not supposed to ever share anything about your partner or relationship! "If posting together feels fun and real, go for it! But if it starts feeling like a performance or that you are in competition with other couples, it's probably good to take a step back," she warns.

Also, keep in mind that social media doesn't show you every single moment of couples' lives so don't worry about trying to look picture perfect based on a 30 second to 30 minute video.

If you feel that your partner doesn't post you enough on social media, talk to them before launching into an angsty rant because your assumptions might not always be right. I wish someone would've shared this advice 10 years ago, but all that matters is knowing you don't have to let being upset about your partner's lack of relationship posts be the reason your day is ruined.

The problem arises when your partner doesn't seem receptive to talking about your concerns because dismissive or evasive attitudes are a no-no!

We have more relationship advice if you're looking for more romantic tips and tricks!

Tom Holland and Zendaya are the "it" couple right now, and they're both at the top of their game. Tom Holland took a recent break from acting and has been doing phenomenal charity work with his Brothers Trust foundation, while Zendaya's had hit after hit with Euphoria, Dune 2, and Challengers. And it looks like the couple, who met doing Spider-Man: Homecoming, could be doing another new Marvel movie. Here's everything we know about Spider-Man 4.

Is Tom Holland's Spider-Man 4 coming?

Emma McIntyre/Getty Images

Yes, we're getting a Spider-Man 4! Tom Holland finally confirmed the news during an October 22 appearance on The Tonight Show, and in true Tom fashion, already revealed a huge piece of news: the movie will start shooting next summer. "Everything’s good to go — we’re nearly there,” he said. “Super exciting. I can’t wait!”

Before the movie was confirmed, producer Amy Pascal told Variety (when asked if they're making a fourth film), “Of course, we are."

It might feel like a new movie conflicts with the fact Spider-Man: No Way Home set up an MCU without Tom Holland's Peter Parker, especially since Tom said he needed to take a break from acting after The Crowded Room "broke" him. ("I’m now taking a year off, and that is a result of how difficult this show was," he tells Extra.)

However, Tom's also been very vocal about how much Spider-Man means to him, and how much he loves the movies. He also told Variety at The Crowded Room premiere in 2023 that he was already “having meetings” about the next installment.

“The simple answer is that I’ll always want to do Spider-Man films,” Tom tells Deadline at the Sands Film Festival. “We have the best in the business working toward whatever the story might be. But until we’ve cracked it, we have a legacy to protect...The third movie was so special in so many ways that we need to make sure we do the right thing.”

What has Tom Holland said about returning as Peter Parker?

Jay Maidment/Sony Pictures/Marvel

Tom Holland recently revealed that he's actually already read a script for Spider-Man 4 — and that he loved it! “We have a creative and we have a pitch and a draft, which is excellent,” he tells the Rich Roll Podcast (via Variety). “It needs work, but the writers are doing a great job. I read it three weeks ago and it really lit a fire in me. Zendaya and I sat down and read it together and we, at times, were bouncing around the living room like this is a real movie worthy of the fans’ respect.”

“One of the things is that, with Marvel, your film is a small cog in a large machine,” he continues. “That machine has got to keep running. You have to make sure you can fit into that timeline at the right time to benefit the bigger picture. That’s one of the challenges we’re facing. The time in which we need to get that done is a tall order but definitely achievable with the people we have working on it now.”

Peter Parker is one character fans take very seriously, and I know that with Tom and Zendaya at the front, this movie is going to be just as special as Spider-Man: No Way Home!

Will Zendaya be in Spider-Man 4?

JoJo Whilden/Sony Pictures/Marvel

With the recent news that Euphoria season 3 was delayed — and the cast has been given the greenlight to take other projects — it's totally safe to assume Zendaya will return for Spider-Man 4. And fans are hoping for even more characters they love! "Hopefully Kingpin, Scorpion, Daredevil and Black Cat," says one Reddit user.

Forbes has also recently reported Sydney Sweeney could be joining the cast of Spider-Man 4. Sydney was in Madame Web earlier this year, and after rumors she booked the role thinking she was joining the MCU, this newest Tom Holland film would give her the opportunity to do just that. We could see her as Gwen Stacy, or as Felicia Hardy/Black Cat. Considering we've already gotten an extensive plotline surrounding Peter and Gwen in Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone's universe, I'm hoping we'd see her as Felicia!

Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Ringsdirector Destin Daniel Cretton is in talks to take over from Jon Watts, who directed the first three movies.

Has Spider-Man 4 started filming?

Columbia Pictures/Sony Pictures/Marvel

Spider-Man 4 will start filming in "next summer" according to Tom Holland, which we're taking to mean the summer of 2025. Based on the schedule for Spider-Man: Far From Home, we could see Spider-Man 4 in the summer of 2026.

What will be the title of Spider-Man 4?

Columbia Pictures/Sony Pictures/Marvel

We don't have an official name for Spider-Man 4 yet, but fans are already coming up with new ideas. Some fan titles include The Spectacular Spider-Man,Spider-Man: Homeless, and Spider-Man: Home Again. I'd love for Spider-Man 4 to continue with the "home" theme, but switching things up with a brand new title would provide a fresh feel we haven't gotten before. I'm excited to see what Marvel goes with!

What are the Tom Holland Spider-Man movies in order?

Columbia Pictures/Sony Pictures/Marvel

Tom Holland has three Spider-Man movies, but he also shows up in some other MCU titles. If you want to watch all the movies Tom Holland plays Peter Parker, here's how you should watch them:

  • Captain America: Civil War
  • Spider-Man: Homecoming
  • Avengers: Infinity War
  • Avengers: Endgame
  • Spider-Man: Far From Home
  • Spider-Man: No Way Home

What do you want to see in Tom Holland and Zendaya's Spider-Man 4? Let us know in the comments!

This post has been updated.

The perks of having an older sister means I've been able to ask her all my more embarrassing questionsgrowing up. My whole life, we've chatted about everything from periods to sex to giving birth. Then one day, right before I graduated high school, she gifted me a book that changed everything: Nancy Redd's Body Drama: Real Girls, Real Bodies, Real Issues, Real Answers. It not only helped me understand my body more, but it also helped soothe some of the insecurity I had before my postpartum body developed into what it is today.

I eventually gifted Body Drama to someone else, but I never forgot about how beneficial it was, and I always thought there should be more work like it out in the world. As it turns out, Nancy Redd wasn't done normalizing bodies and questions bout sexual health — the author and Wirecutter journalist just released The Real Body Manual: Your Visual Guide to Health & Wellness! Not only is it a great resource for those who are looking for answers to more specific health questions, but it's something I continue to revisit on the days my insecurity dampens my mood!

I chatted with Redd to understand more about her work — and I came out understanding even more about myself and how I want to help raise the future generation.

The Difference Between 'Body Drama' And 'The Real Body Manual'

Amazon

If you've had the pleasure of sticking your nose in Nancy Redd's Body Drama, you're familiar with how well-researched and thorough it is. In that regard, The Real Body Manual is no different — but Redd highlights it's still a "totally different book." She says, "The world has changed dramatically, and we're talking so much more about bodies, and we see a lot more bodies."

Despite seeing all those "real" bodies on TV and otherwise, women — and people in general — still don't feel great about themselves. According to a 2022 study, 32% of teens had a negative opinion about their acne, while 31% weren't comfortable with their weight. Meanwhile, another study shows that 80% of women have referred to themselves as "fat."

To combat troubling statistics like those, Redd hopesThe Real Body Manual can help. "I think we're all operating with not enough information about the world we live in, and I think the more information we can receive in a safe, educated, medically-accurate space, the better," she explains.

Centre for Ageing Better

Redd also really wanted to write a book that taught both her son and her daughter about their changing bodies — and she feels this is the perfect time for everyone to come together and learn about the way bodies not only look, but function. She likens these lessons to learning about world geography. "We don't just need to know about the small town we live in. We need to know about the state, country, the world-at-large," she stresses. And she thinks The Real Body Manual can help you "learn about your own body, your friends, and the people in society you live with."

If you look at the group of friends I have today, everyone doesn't have the same body shame. One of my friends is a little taller and curvier than I am while another is shorter and rounder. I dealt with acne-prone skin and dark spots while my best friend Cookie didn't really struggle with that. It's honestly rare that everyone will look the same — and that's okay! But learning about what's going on with all of us helps bridge our experiential gaps and creates better shared understanding.

And with that in mind, here are the 4 things I learned about my body — and all bodies — when chatting with Nancy and reading The Real Body Manual.

1. Understanding Your Body Doesn't Have To Look Like Everyone Else's

MART PRODUCTION

I grew up during a time where certain body types were celebrated more than others in media, and it had a negative effect on how I perceived my own body. I believed I wasn't supposed to have stretch marks because video vixens didn't, and became horrified when I discovered them in middle school as a slender girl. Not only that, but I didn't really develop curves until after I gave birth which made me feel like an outlier in my community.

Recent studies found there's a link between teens aged 16-18 years old developing body dysmorphia and social media...which doesn't sound surprising. And while there are countless body positive accounts that also exist — and I really do promise I'm not saying to completely ditch your socials — sometimes you have to take a step away from it (and other influencers) if it's having a negative impact on your self-esteem.

"Some bodies naturally look like those in music videos. I think separating that from being able to find love or have purpose in your life — they're completely separate things," Redd insists. She breaks things down even further by explaining why you not looking a certain way doesn't discount you from enjoying life. "Some people are born with the ability to be tennis stars, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't pick up a tennis racket because you're not Serena Williams."

The main point she drives home is that "every person can have a great time with their bodies" which is why The Real Body Manual reads like an encouraging, evidence-based love letter to readers.

2. Loving Yourself Is A Choice

Anna Tarazevich

Just like I had to make the decision to fully accept the body I have, it's something Nancy says everyone has the ability to do. "It's literally a choice," she says before one of her kids quickly pops into our convo. In a tender moment, she asks her child, "Hello, do you love your body?"

This brief encounter circles back to the reason why The Real Body Manual matters — it opens up these conversations with our kids, offering a tangible resource for others. I know I try to have more conversations like this with my son, and I've even encouraged him to hug himself when he needs a little dose of self love.

"The things that matter — having purpose in life, feeling love, being a good community member — don't have much to do with whether you have hyperpigmentation, freckles, cellulite, etc.," she says. "The more you know from the beginning of your journey that bodies look different, the easier it is for you to accept [yourself]. But if the only bodies you're seeing are sexualized in pornography, videos, and magazines, you don't have a real basis."

It's one of the biggest reasons she intended for The Real Body Manual to be a visual guide.

3. Your Naked Body Is Beautiful

cottonbro studio

"I really like showing people what the body actually looks like for the most part," Redd says. Yeah, that's right — The Real Body Manual features real people's bodies, not just illustrations. In doing so, she says, "Everyone can see someone who resembles them." It doesn't matter if you're heavy-set, a person with different sized breasts, or anything in-between. The point is that you'll be able to find yourself somewhere in The Real Body Manual.

My mother told me how little information her own mom shared with her about bodies. Because of that, my mom always stressed that she wanted my sister and I to have access to whatever information we needed. She wanted us to be informed, and never inhibited by her own lack of comfort over a topic. But not all parents feel comfortable sharing with their kids.

Redd says, "I don't think it was done with malice. I think people are just working with whatever they have which is not a lot." She further notes people have chosen to refer to genitals as "down there" for both men and women instead of saying the proper term for them for their autonomy. I'll be honest — growing up in a religious background often means sexual shame was attached to very normal things like breasts and penises.

Not everyone was on board with me telling my toddler he has a penis instead of saying "pee pee" — or not talking about it at all, if we're being honest. But I wanted him to feel comfortable with what he was born with, and to know that his dad having the same anatomy is normal. "We just don't use the proper names for things which increases this shroud of secrecy about it. We aren't taught health literacy," Redd says.

4. 'The Real Body Manual' Is A Must-Have For Pre-Teens, Teens, And Adults

Yan Krukau

Funnily enough, Redd informs me that October is actually Health Literacy Month, making all this really round out. We should know what's going on with our bodies, whether it's the proper terminology, what changes we're going through, what we can look like. Ignorance only makes our experiences more confusing and harder — especially when we're young and probably have a million different questions.

She explains that if you ask people specifics like 'How does a period work,' then they may not know the answer. "The same goes for if you ask what's the difference between a freckle and a mole," Redd explains. "It may not seem like these things are a big deal, but when something goes wrong, you need to know 'I need to get this thing checked out.'"

Information is power, and when armed with information about our bodies we can lead safer, healthier lives. Instead of wondering why we don't talk about things enough, Redd decided to take the bull by the horns and talk about them — and she thinks you should talk about them, even (and sometimes especially) when they're uncomfortable. She says, "Any time you feel shame or discomfort discussing your body, that's a sign you don't have enough information."

If you find yourself unable to ask other people questions, but want to start feeling comfortable in your body, I highly recommend that you read both Body Drama and The Real Body Manual because they're equipped with detailed explanations — and helpful imagery — about how bodies actually look, work, and feel.

Buy 'The Real Body Manual' Here!

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The Real Body Manual

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