4 Reasons Why Your Bad Boss Might Actually Be Your Fault

Science says there are two types of bad bosses. But there’s also the possibility that while you see the person you report to as Miranda’s clone from The Devil Wears Prada and feel like she totally hates you, she could actually be doing a great job to help you reach your full potential. We talked to Sophia Hyder, an international development pro and cultural etiquette expert, to help clarify when it’s time to cut your boss a break or make some personal (and professional) changes. Keep reading for four times where you could be the one to blame for a tough working relationship, as well as how to fix it.

You’re not communicating clearly

“Some people feel vulnerable about asking for help when they feel overwhelmed, and totally fail to ask for it when they need it most,” Hyder says. “When this happens, you might unintentionally fail to clearly communicate what you’ve been working on — so your boss has legitimately no idea how to guide you.” Solid point.

How to Fix It: Since this issue happens to the most hard-working people, Hyder suggests thinking about your work relationship just like you might a personal one. “Remember that in any healthy relationship, communication is key,” she notes. “Your boss isn’t a mind reader, so they won’t know how to help problem-solve if they don’t even know a problem exists. Fill them in, and ask for help or guidance.”

You have a hard time adapting to change

“An employee who can’t accommodate structural changes is really hard for a boss to coach and manage,” Hyder tells us. “While you might believe a process is working well and that you shouldn’t have to adapt to a new environment, you need to *always* be a team player first.” Try to remember that your boss likely has more intel and a higher level vision than you do, and that she’s not the devil for switching things up.

How to Fix It: Have questions or anxiety about a change? Bring them to your boss directly. You should always feel empowered to ask questions and suggest improvements. Your boss will appreciate how much you care about the work flow.

You’re Immediately Defensive

Feedback can be hard to hear, especially if you’re sensitive about a project you’ve poured your heart and soul into. While taking it can be tough, Hyder stresses the importance of learning to incorporate an outside view into what you’re working on. “Instead of seeing feedback from your boss as a personal attack, take it as observations,” she advises. “Then, you won’t feel paralyzed or anxious and can become even better at your job.” Another mistake? Placing blame. “Trying to find fault can create a ton of tension for a team, and it makes it super hard for your boss to use and improve members’ skill sets,” Hyder explains. Speaking poorly of your boss behind their back because you’re upset about feedback they’ve shared is another major no-no.

How to Fix It: Do your best to listen, ask thoughtful questions, and take notes when you do receive feedback, rather than immediately defending yourself or placing blame. Take the time you need to fully process criticisms — and if you still feel like they’re outlandish, hurtful, or not conducive to growth, share your feelings with the HR department.

You’ve Started to Feel Entitled

If you’ve been at your company for a while, it’s possible you’ve lost some of the excitement and energy you had when you first started, whether you realize it or not. “Feel like you won’t be fired because you’ve been loyal? Remember that you still need to hustle, act like a team player, and push yourself. You shouldn’t feel like you’re entitled to pick and choose just because you’ve been around longer; sometimes, people have a more specialized skill set for a project, and it can help the team and company better succeed,” Hyder says. “This definitely doesn’t mean you have a bad boss.” You still have to earn your successes, no matter how long you’ve been working at a place.

How to Fix It: Own your strengths, define your interests, and set goals that’ll keep you as challenged and energized as when you first took the job. Take initiative to discuss these things with your boss in your next one-on-one meeting or review. If there’s no longer room for you to grow or you discover that your skills no longer suit the team, start thinking about your next opportunity. Variety is the spice of life, after all.

Have an awesome boss? Tell us why they rock and how much you appreciate them on Twitter @BritandCo!

(Photos via Getty)

Celebrity breakups are never fun to hear about (hello, Zoe Kravitz and Channing Tatum 😭), but sometimes they seem to give entertainers a boost of personal and creative inspiration. Case in point — Natalie Portman's divorce has given her an almost femme fatale edge. We last saw her in Lady in the Lake, but she recently stepped out with a new hairstyle that's reframed her face!

What new hairstyle does Natalie Portman have?

Natasha Campos/Getty Images for Netflix and Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images

On October 28, Natalie Portman turned heads when she stepped onto the red carpet at the 68th Ballon D'Or Ceremony at Theatre Du Chatelet in Paris. She's traded in the long balayage hair she's been wearing for a shorter dark brown bob that rests slightly below her chin. Though the silk press may be in style, Natalie allowed her curls to shine and seemed to wear eye makeup that mirrors her new hair color.

The actress also shared a pictureof herself next to Aitana Bonmatí and a clearer view of her hairstyle is visible. She didn't mention anything about it, opting to keep the focus on Bonmatí's achievement instead. "Hero 🙌 Congratulations Aitana Bonmatí on your Ballon d’Or award! It was such an honor to be there with you and to celebrate all you’ve done for women’s football." her caption says.

Even if Natalie doesn't care to address this new style, we think it's perfect for her!

When did Natalie Portman announce her divorce from Benjamin Millepied?

Unique Nicole/Getty Images

Prior to getting divorced, sources say Natalie tried her best to reconcile things in her marriage to Benjamin. But, it seems like some things — like infidelity — are hard to move past. "She didn’t give up on [her marriage] lightly. But it became pretty apparent toward the end of last year that her heart had gone out of it," one person told US Weekly. Apparently Natalie started noticing a trend in her ex-husband's behavior prior to his bombshell affair because another source told the outlet that the ballet dancer "would sometimes not return home and was taking work trips that didn’t add up."

This ultimately led Natalie to file for divorce, but it was done "quietly," according to PEOPLE's report in March 2024. Not only that, but the news outlet is reporting that the divorce proceedings are officially over! A source said, "It was initially really tough for her, but her friends rallied around her and helped get her through the worst of it." Natalie's apparently "come out the other side of it stronger and is finding joy in her family, friends and work."

Why did Natalie Portman and Benjamin Millepied get divorced?

Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images

Although Natalie Portman didn't 100% address what happened, fans have long speculated that Benjamin's alleged cheating mishap was the cause of their marriage's demise. Page Six reported the couple were struggling to deal with the ballet dancer's romantic interest in the "glamorous young climate activity Camille Étienne." At the time, a source told the outlet Natalie and Benjamin were trying to hold things together. "They have not split and are trying to work things out. Ben is doing everything he can to get Natalie to forgive him. He loves her and their family."

How long were Natalie Portman and Benjamin Millepied married?

John Shearer/Getty Images

Natalie Portman and her ex-husband Benjamin Millepied were married for 11 years prior to walking away from "happily ever after," (via People). They also have two children together, Aleph (12) and Amalia (7).

We're always sad when couples breakup, but we love to see that Natalie's moving on with her life and showing that she's willing to embrace something new — like her shorter bob!

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Gisele Bündchen is a household name, no matter who her partner is — but it's no secret the supermodel made waves when she split from her football star husband, Tom Brady, in 2022. It's clear she's not holding on to the past, though. After dating Joaquim Valente for the past two years, the couple is officially expecting their first child together! Here's everything we know about Gisele's growing family!

Is Gisele Bündchen pregnant?

Michael Loccisano/Getty Images for Gaia Herbs

Yes! According to PEOPLE, an inside source told the outlet that the 44-year-old supermodel is officially expecting her third child. This is her first baby with current boyfriend, Joaquim Valente. The source said, "Gisele and Joaquim are happy for this new chapter in their life and they're looking forward to creating a peaceful and loving environment for the whole family."

Who is Gisele Bündchen's boyfriend?

Instagram/gisele

Joaquim Valente is a jiu-jitsu professional at his family-owned studio, Valente Brothers. The 34-year-old continues a decades-long tradition of teaching this martial art to future generations — and his girlfriend!

These two have been linked together since 2022, but didn't start officially dating until June 2023 according to PEOPLE. In 2024, a source also told PEOPLE that this wasn't "a serious love affair," but the tides have clearly turned since then.

In March 2024, Gisele The New York Times, “This is the first time I am seeing someone that was a friend of mine first." She then noted, “It’s very different. It is very honest, and it’s very transparent.” She also was quick to deny that there was any overlap with her ex-husband, stressing that these types of rumors happen "to a lot of women" who "have the courage to leave an unhealthy relationship."

As for the most current state of Gisele and Joaquim's relationship? A source told Page Six, “Their chemistry together has always been there and they have a lot in common. They've been in love for a while." That being said, sources also told Page Sixthat they don't think the pair will get married "anytime soon." Despite Gisele being "thrilled" to welcome another child, her friends tell the outlet that the couple will just "live together for now."

Regardless, we're also thrilled for these two, and we hope their new child brings them so much joy!

How many kids does Gisele Bündchen have?

Instagram/gisele

Gisele Bündchen and Tom Brady have two children together — Bejamin Rein (14) and Vivian Lake (11). According to Page Six, a source says that these two "really like" Joaquim Valente, as he's been living with them in Miami "for a while." We just know these two will be fabulous siblings to the new little one, given the way they show so much love to their parents!

When did Gisele Bündchen and Tom Brady get divorced?

Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images for The Met Museum/Vogue

Gisele Bündchen and Tom Brady officially divorced in 2022. However, according to Page Six, this all started back in 2020 when Tom wouldn't retire from the NFL — and according to a source from PEOPLE, their problems date back as long as 10 years! Regardless, it's clear Gisele's moved on to a new chapter in her life. Good for her!

Has Tom Brady said anything about Gisele Bündchen's new pregnancy?

Instagram/tombrady

While sources told TMZthat Gisele Bündchen told Tom Brady about her pregnancy before the news broke to the general public, other sources told Page Sixthat he only just found out "very recently" — and apparently, he didn't find out from Gisele. Sources explained to Page Six that the ex-spouses "talk when they have to." So I guess this situation didn't exactly qualify as having to talk...

Tom hasn't made an official statement about Gisele's pregnancy, but he did take to Instagram on October 28. The former football star posted an image of the sunset, three hearts, and The Chicks' cover of "Landslide." The Stevie Nicks original is all about the changes life brings, so Tom's seemingly alluding to the changes coming in his own life.

Whatever happens next, we hope that this modern family navigates this new chapter with grace and love!

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If you love Gilmore Girls, then there's a very good chance you really love Luke Danes. Not only is he handsome, but his snarky realism is the perfect balance for Lorelai's chaotic, emotional idealism. But even though Luke is Lorelai's perfect match, one Reddit user thinks that there's another GG character who would make the ultimate stepdad for Rory: Max Medina.

  • While Luke was the perfect match for Lorelai, fans think Max would have been a better stepdad for Rory.
  • Max was honest and a great communicator.
  • He also would have helped Rory during that Gilmore Girls season 5 spiral.

Do Lorelai and Max get married on Gilmore Girls?

Warner Bros. TV

Lorelai and Max are engaged during Gilmore Girls season 1, but Lorelai ends up calling off the wedding. But while we're over the moon when Lorelai and Luke finally get together, some GG fans wish Max had stayed in Rory's life.

"I’m just going go say it — if Lorelai had ended up with Max, Rory would have been a much more successful adult," Reddit user @StregaCagna says. While Max wasn't Lorelai's perfect match, his particular mix of honesty and kindness would have been so good for Rory. "Those traits, combined with his background as an English teacher, would have meant he absolutely would have been straight with Rory on so many things. Like, can you just imagine how he would have reacted to Jess? Logan? Her dropping out of Yale? Her floating around in her 30s?"

Honestly, if the Gilmores (Richard and Emily included) didn't tiptoe around so many issues, and felt comfortable being vulnerable and honest with each other about the hard stuff, I think a lot of the characters' problems would have been solved. And Max's ability to tell the truth in love would have been a breath of fresh air! He wouldn't have let Rory get away with anything (remember how he doesn't let her take the Shakespeare test when she's late to school?), but that also means she'd develop an insane sense of trust with him.

Neil Jacobs/Netflix

"I think she would have written her book when she did, but instead of being the Editor of the Stars Hollow Gazette, she would have been, like, the most popular English professor at Wesleyan who had a strong professional network and also wrote for The Atlantic and The New Yorker," @StregaCagna continues.

Of course, there's absolutely nothing wrong with small town papers — I love my small town paper! The root of Rory's issue is that she just completely stopped chasing her dreams, which seems to lead her to an unhappy adulthood. She's dating Paul (whom she can never remember), she's having an affair with Logan (who's engaged to someone else, ick), and she's become the kind of journalist who falls asleep on the job and doesn't have pitches prepared. I can't help but wonder if some structure during her teenage years would have set her up on a different path.

"I will never forget the scene where she’s interviewing [Max] and says she really wanted him to be her step father," user @StruggleDesigner8307 says. "She wanted that father figure and Max was so great."

Warner Bros. TV

I do think Rory's friendship with Paris (one of the greatest TV choices of all time) gives her some of that structure and drive, but it doesn't really balance out the way that Richard, Emily, and even Lorelai spoil her. And when you're not used to loving constructive criticism, unloving criticism hurts all the worse. Yes, I'm talking about Mitchum Huntzberger.

"I’ll always be sad that Rory lost out on yet another great father figure when she was saddled with Chris," user @wrenhawkeye says of Max's exit from the show. "A lot of people don’t understand that her spiral to Mitchum’s words wasn’t just because Rory’s 'weak' or whatever misogynistic BS. It’s because Rory has real problems with male validation since her father abandoned her. It also doesn’t hurt that Mitchum was a titan in his field."

GG fans know about THAT Gilmore Girls season 5 arc like the back of their hand, but this whole discussion is giving me more compassion for Rory than I've felt before. Because to be 20 and to hear you're supposedly not good enough for your life's one dream is hard — and to spiral to that degree after a man who has no stake in your life criticizes you just proves Rory put her entire identity into being a journalist. But you know who would have given Rory encouragement while reminding her she's more than just a writer? Max.

Warner Bros. TV

I can totally see a Gilmore Girls where Max stayed in Rory's life and offered her guidance on basically everything: boys, college applications, her career aspirations, and even drama with Paris. And I'm not the only one.

"I think they would have stayed in touch past high-school and college," @synalgo_12 says, "and he would be one of the people she'd thank in her work or would be part of her list of mentors or 'influenced by' had she ever gotten her own Wikipedia page or biography."

Somebody call Amy Sherman-Palladino because this is the Gilmore Girls spinoff we need!

​Why did Max Medina leave?

Warner Bros. TV

Max ends up leaving Gilmore Girls after Lorelai calls off their wedding. While he sticks around through seasons 2 and 3, and still has an insane amount of chemistry with Lorelai, the last time we see him is in season 3 episode 19 (coincidentally, right before Rory's life really goes off the rails in my opinion).

While we're talking about THAT GG season 5 arc, read why This Gilmore Girls Season 1 Moment Proves Rory Really DIDN'T Have What It Takes To Be A Journalist.