5 Real Witches Set the Record Straight on What TV and the Movies Get ALL Wrong

Pop culture has always been full of witchy women — some of them even based on input from real witches — that, frankly, we adore. But movies and TV don’t always tell the whole story, and as much as on-screen depictions are obviously meant for entertainment, living as a witch is no joke for many people. We spoke with five different women who identify as witches, adhering to the strict requirements of witch life and even running businesses as witches, about their practices and some of the common misconceptions they face.

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Sweaty weekend goddess looks

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Jessie Susannah, 36, San Francisco, CA

Jessie says she tapped into her spiritual powers as early as her teen years, but a lack of like-minded community, combined with a focus on maintaining the traditions of Judaism she’d been raised with, put her out of touch with that part of her life for many years. It wasn’t until Jessie experienced pregnancy and childbirth that she began to reclaim her inner witch.

“I remember taking a hike with one of my best friends and saying to her that I was having a revelation that I was a witch, and she turned and gave me this really sharp look,” Jessie tells Brit + Co in an email.

Now, she says, if she encounters similar responses, she doesn’t feel an obligation to or interest in educating people. The most common misconception, she says, is that being a witch is somehow different from being a regular person. “To me, being a witch means being in touch with the energetics of places, people, objects, and nature, and taking conscious active ownership and interest in that aspect of being.”

Her practice is now primarily centered around altars, and she integrates essences, crystals, plants, astrology, meditation, divination, and prayer into the hour-by-hour living of her daily life. In the fall of 2013, she also started incorporating her practice into her professional life, turning her bookkeeping and tax services into an intuitive financial coaching business called Money Witch. She helps people study their problems with finances and to use energetic allies to help take ownership and control over their relationship with money.

Currently, occult-affiliated practices like tarot cards, crystals, covens, astrology, and even spells are more present in social media feeds than ever, but Jessie generously sees past the trend.

“I think that when people are attracted to something, there is value in digging deeper into why that aesthetic is interesting to them,” she says. “Part of me questions whether a lot of the people who are finding themselves attracted to or engaging in this aesthetic right now are really just in the beginning stages of opening up to a deeper relationship with the energetic realm.”

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Getting ready! @austinwitchescircle

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ChosenEyes (Leah), 34, Austin, TX

ChosenEyes is a psychic medium and tarot reader best known for her scrying — or mirror reading, a technique first made famous by the one and only Nostradamus — and is a fixture in Austin’s witch community, frequently holding events and teaching classes in tarot reading. She first learned about witchcraft in middle school, though prior to that, she had always been fascinated by, and felt a kinship with, stories she’d heard about Black women in the south who were “very skilled at healing and helping with herbs and had ‘the sight.’”

“Identifying publicly as a witch came much later in life for a couple of reasons,” ChosenEyes, who has been professionally practicing since she was 14, says in an email. “[One], the stigma associated within Black America for being anything other than Christian,” noting that it was accepted by her own family as long as it stayed in the house. “[Two], not really seeing myself in the mainstream,” she continues. “Usually, if a Black woman practices magic or is psychic in a movie, we’re the ‘evil one up to no good,’ a moniker not always bestowed upon our white counterparts. So feeling it was okay to go public was a bit scary.”

Her fears were justified. ChosenEyes said that, once she did go public, many around her reacted with fear and disbelief, and some even cut her out of their lives. “But, on a positive note, it put a lot about me as a person in perspective for many closest to me,” she countered. “I, as a person, made more sense once they knew this about me.”

As a busy working mom, wife, and medical student (she’s currently completing her doctoral fellowship for Oriental Medicine, focusing on herbal topical therapies for tissue regeneration and infection management in burn rehabilitation), ChosenEyes stresses that it’s not as glamorous a life as some people think — nor as uncommon.

“There are those who assume that if your spiritual practice is also your profession then you’re a gimmick, social degenerate, or uneducated,” ChosenEyes says. “Witches are quite scholarly, astute, passionate, self-educated, and/or formally educated people. Many of us (myself included) blend in quite nicely and remain undetectable in most cases. We’re your doctors, lawyers, teachers, Uber driver, checkout clerk — we’re literally EVERYWHERE!”

Monica Bodirsky, Toronto, Canada

Not unlike many women first coming into their craft, Monica Bodirsky was just a teenager when she began identifying as a witch, but didn’t say so publicly for a while.

“I neither had the time nor inclination to argue or try to convince people that it is a practice, not a nasty woman or a satanist,” she tells us via email. The artist, illustrator, author, and educator has, throughout her practicing years, seen a shift in the way people perceive witches — from assuming they’re satanists to assuming witches don’t believe in science — but still comes up against some pretty frustrating characterizations.

“It is a bit tiresome when people are condescending and dismissive about witchcraft’s very diverse beliefs and practices,” she says. “Often they are all labelled as ‘magical’ thinking and thought of as childish, naive, or primitive. I believe some of those people have colonized thought issues and need to look to their own fears of the immeasurable and unknown.”

Bodirsky is the woman behind Witchfest North, a Toronto festival created to unite Witches, Wiccans, Wise Women, and Pagans in the arts. It’s a community that consists of, and welcomes, trans, queer, and BIPOC magical practitioners from many cultural backgrounds and all ages. Bodirsky says that she was inspired to launch the fest after witnessing the flourishing witch culture in Salem, MA, and has gotten the thumbs-up from both Salem mayor Kim Driscoll and Toronto mayor John Tory.

“I think it’s the right time,” Bodirsky says of the growing cultural acceptance and representation. “I don’t think there is ‘bad’ visibility in a diverse and pluralistic community. Some witches are outspoken, some are quiet, some have degrees from educational institutes and others have learned from generations of practitioners. As Deborah and Rick Hamouris, who created the goddess chant say, ‘We are a circle within a circle, with no beginning and never ending.”’

(Photo via Becca Lemire Photography)

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Are you disengaged with your day-to-day, confused about your path, even without hope for your future? Do those next steps in your life seem foggy, like you're unable to even lift your foot in the right direction? Are the trappings of your life practically perfect, and yet you feel more lost than ever? I've been there. I used to wake up every morning in a panic. I was never quite sure what was wrong, but something always was. Something seemingly unknowable. My life didn't fit; I didn't fit. I spent years being completely convinced that there was an illusive something wrong with me, and that I had brought confusion and failure upon myself. Everything looked perfect on the outside yet I was lost, and by the time I realized it I couldn't see any way forward. But I found a new way to live. I learned new integrative tools that have allowed me to have a healthy relationship, start my own business, and live a life beyond what I had ever imagined. I want to share them with you. Intuitive Counseling is a therapeutic offering drawing on self-care tools like tarot, herbal remedies, and flower essences to help you find a clear path forward even when you feel like a stranger in your own life. In a 60 minute one-on-one session, you will be invited to thoroughly examine your path and be offered divine medicine to assist in unraveling the threads of your story so you can take those first steps towards a life beyond your wildest dreams. The session will be specific to your needs and goals, and may address your physical, emotional, and spiritual states. We will draw on the clarity of the tarot to shift your fears out of the driver's seat, so you can step fully into the present moment and begin to heal yourself. After our session you will be calm, secure, and ready to move forward with written recommendations and the full support of the universe. Visit the link in my profile to book your session.

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Sarah M. Chappell, 31, Asheville, NC

Sarah M. Chappell knew she was a witch since the third grade when she’d sneak books home from school and perform rituals on the basement floor.

“I tried to avoid being baptized when I was in fifth grade by telling my mother I was a witch,” she says via email, still able to recall the look of confusion and judgment that came across her mom’s face.

After getting into trouble for talking about witchcraft at school, she let it slide away until, three years ago, she moved to Brooklyn and heard about IRL moon circles, herbalism, and other community-based activities she had craved as a child. “Except now they were cool!” she says, underlining a major benefit of witchcraft’s current place in the zeitgeist.

Chappell says that, when she made a decision to quit drinking, her intuitive connection came back intensely. It was then that she started the latest incarnation of her craft, which she defines as “a deeply personal spiritual practice [consisting of] daily meditation and journeying.” She now professionally practices tarot, energy work, and herbalism to facilitate healing, and is happy to report that, now, even her mother thinks her work is pretty cool.

Chappell, who holds a degree in molecular cell biology, isn’t territorial over the witchy life, stressing that one of the major misconceptions she encounters is that witchcraft is one thing and one thing alone. She prefers a more-the-merrier approach.

“If [the popularity of witchcraft-related practices] help people to find themselves, to connect with the world, to feel more confident, and to develop their own spiritual practice, then that’s amazing,” she says. “If it helps people like me feel less weird because when I say I’m a tarot reader the response is, ‘cool I saw a great deck in Urban Outfitters’ instead of ‘you’re going to hell,’ I’m fine with that too.”

And, like any good millennial witch, Chappell thinks fondly of The Craft. “I remember seeing it at the video store when I was a kid and being too afraid to ask my parents if we could rent it,” she admits. “When I finally saw the movie as an adult I was so so so so so pumped. Of course it’s not an accurate portrayal of witches, but it is amazing. The clothes are great, and I love anything with badass powerful women. I wouldn’t recommend using it as a foundational resource for your own practice, but it’s such a fun (and dare I say feminist) movie. I’m going to go watch it again right now!”

Pinky Doll (Jessica Barajas), 32, Rialto, CA

For Pinky Doll, being a witch isn’t just a practice but a strict and sometimes difficult lifestyle. She details the long and unconventional hours, the struggles with acceptance from family and friends, and what she calls the “spiritual battles” that can ensue when taking on a client’s bad energy.

“Sometimes it’s not ideal, but it’s of great importance for me to keep the communication open,” she tells Brit + Co in an email. “Ultimately that’s the reason I do what I do. My desire and passion is to help others.”

Pinky, who is Mexican-American, grew up in a Catholic household, but as part of her Mexican culture, she says she was always exposed to healers, tarot readers, and witches. When she was honest with her immediate family about what she eventually came to define as her Paganism and Santeria practices, she says they were hesitant but accepting (the rest of her extended family wasn’t so understanding). She reassured her skeptics that she didn’t worship the devil and set about dispelling other misunderstandings surrounding her work in healing, cleansings, spells, and tarot (she also does readings on her YouTube channel).

“We take full self-responsibility for what we do which, in my opinion, is what differentiates us from every other practice,” she says. “We do not hide or conveniently make excuses. To the core of our being, we know that which we put out comes back to us, which is why we are so mindful about actions, how we treat others, and who we really are when in solitude.”

As for the occult practices and aesthetics that dominate the witch conversation in 2017, Pinky Doll says that it’s not up to her to judge who, or what, is right or wrong.

“Everyone chooses for many different reasons and that’s their business not mine,” she says. “There’s no such thing as bad press right?”

“There are endless streams of beliefs in this practice,” Pinky Doll concludes, “but in the end whatever it is that one chooses to practice or follow — so long as it brings out the best in you — then that’s what’s right for you.”

Do you or do you know someone who identifies as a witch? Share your story @BritandCo.

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I’ve triedtons of different food trends in my day. From dumping chili oil on ice cream to concocting my very own Sleepy Girl Mocktail, nothing I’ve eaten measures up to the sheer weirdness we saw go viral on social media this year (major side eye to Dua Lipa’s pickle Diet Coke).

These are the top 5 most ridiculous TikTok-viral food trends of 2024 that left us questioning whether they really should’ve gone viral in the first place.

@claudiaeatsgood chamoy pickles are so good😋😩❤️ @Bussin Snacks #chamoypickle#chamoy#chamoypicklekit#bussinsnacks#takis#fruitrollup#mukbang#asmr#asmrmukbang#chamoypicklemukbang#juicy#pickle#mexicancandy♬ original sound - Claudia💕

1. Chamoy Pickles

People couldn't quit it with the chamoy pickles (AKA chickles) this year. I never would've guessed that chamoy, a condiment made from dried fruits, chilies, sugar, and lime juice, would be slathered atop the sourest pickles money can buy.

But the food trend didn't stop at just chamoy – many snackers stuffed their pickles with everything from the likes of Hot Cheetos, Takis, and Fruit Roll-Ups. What?!

This insanely sour, tangy treat kickstarted what the internet's coined as the 'Red 40 Diet', which certainly cannot be medically advised.

If you care for your GI tract, this food trend is 100% worth skipping and leaving behind in 2024.

@dualipaofficial

What do we call her?

♬ original sound - Dua Lipa

2. Pickle + Jalapeño-Infused Diet Coke

Diet Coke, pickle juice, and jalapeño juice = all the ingredients needed to concoct Dua Lipa's controversial 2024 drink. She loves it, but I on the other hand, do not.

Now, don't get me wrong: I love a good unexpected flavor combo, but gulping down a simultaneous dose of both pickle juice and jalapeño juice was not tasty to me whatsoever.

This trend even sparked a slew of Sonic diners to start ordering their soft drinks with pickles – but as divisive as this trend can be ("Don’t knock it till you try it," TikToker Mississippi Memaw told Food and Wine), it's just flat out weird.

@logagm

New cucumber recipe 🚨

♬ original sound - Logan

3. Cucumber Salad

If you bought a mandolin slicer recently, you might as well admit you're a victim of the TikTok-viral cucumber salad trend that made its rounds this year.

"Sometimes you need to eat an entire cucumber," TikTok user @logagmsounds off in the intro of every single one of his cucumber salad videos. And thus, the food trend was born.

It felt like I couldn't go a day on TikTok without seeing at least 5 recipes for a damn cucumber salad. When it comes down to it, I can appreciate the novelty (and taste) of this trend, but not the oversaturation. I'm gonna eat an entire cucumber one day, and get so tired of it the next. New innovations in 2025, please!

@kylekruegerr Would you try these?😂 #foodreview#seagrapes#food#review#tastetest#weirdfood♬ original sound - Kyle Krueger

4. Sea Grapes

It was like people wanted to eat the weirdest, grossest things in 2024. I can't blame 'em, especially if it's for clicks and views. But this food trend in particular literally made me want to gag – and I was only watching people eat through a screen (any fellow ASMR fans out there?).

They don't look like they're supposed to be crunchy, but they are. Sea grapes grow from aquatic plants and are filled with essentially what is a "salty liquid." They burst in the mouth when you eat them (one TikToker called them 'edible Orbeez'). Yuck.

@julieta.asmr I figured it out!! Blooper at the end 🥴 #asmr#asmrcommunity#asmrtiktoks#asmrvideo#asmrsounds#asmreating#asmrfood#asmrfyp#asmrmukbang#mukbang#asmreatingsounds♬ original sound - Julieta ASMR 🍒

5. Exploding Candies

The final (and especially weird) food trend I propose we leave behind in 2024 is these dang exploding jelly candies. They also made their rounds on ASMR TikTok, and I truly cannot stand to watch a single video featuring them.

First off, they look so annoying to consume. The fruit-shaped jellies are contained in a thin layer of plastic that's meant to burst open when you sink your teeth into it, prompting you to slurp out the sweetness inside. But what irks me the most is the fact that many people trying them can't even break the seal.

I'd rather watch someone make a simple PB&J than go to town on these microplastic-infused candies.

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First loves are TOUGH — especially when you start to see all the red flags you missed along the way once it's over. If you've been dissecting your own early love stories by reading Reddit threads or chatting with your girlfriends about their own relationship experiences, just know this: you're not alone! The entire Brit + Co staff even found ourselves discussing the first person we ever fell in love with...and the recounts did not disappoint. From realizing 19 seemed to be a common age for our all-time worst relationships to understanding how our first love was probably not as ideal as we originally thought, it made us wonder why we couldn't pinpoint red flags back then.

Licensed Psychotherapist Prerna Menon, founder of Boundless, LCSW-PLLC and Licensed marriage and family therapist Joseph Cavins, LMFT have a few thoughts that have helped us decode the precarious time in our lives.

Here's why some of us ignored how awful our first love might've been

1. We thought our first love was perfect and would argue with anyone who wanted us to take things slow with them.

Savannah Dematteo

I'll never forget the first time I fell in love at 19. I thought my ex was the "wind beneath my wings" because he had a great sense of humor and was creative like me. I told myself he was the person I was going to marry so I was offended when my parents didn't think he was mature enough to be in a serious relationship. If this sounds familiar, pull up a chair because Menon explains why we tend to idealize our first love.

"Your first love is your first experience with romantic love too, hence you typically see it with rose-colored glasses. The overwhelming emotion is often infatuation, which tends to overshadow the more critical and analytical part of our brain," she says. Sadly, this sounds like something my parents told me before but I couldn't fathom how true it was as a teen.

As the Clinical Director at Southern California Sunrise Recovery Center, Cavins has seen this play out before too. He says, "In your first relationship, there is a tendency to put your partner on a pedestal. The excitement of new love can create a powerful emotional fog that makes it hard to see flaws clearly."

Essentially, this "excitement of having a boyfriend, girlfriend, or partner supersedes" our ability to questions things we normally wouldn't put up with, according to Menon.

2. We tried to ignore the how many times our first loves disagreed with our values or goals.

Keira Burton

While some couples are able to make their relationship work despite having a different outlook on life, sometimes it can be a sign that things aren't going to work long-term. Cavins says, "One major red flag is disregarding differences in values or goals for the future. For instance, you wish to become a parent someday while your spouse swears this will never happen— or vice versa. Early on, you might dismiss these differences, believing love will conquer all. However, these mismatched priorities can lead to resentment and challenges over time."

Honestly, I probably should've ran whenever my ex would mock my belief in God only for us to have to attend his mother and stepfather's church whenever I visited. There was so much confusion there, but I tried to dismiss it as something he needed time to work out.

Menon adds, "If this relationship makes you feel like you'e standing in quick sand - where you are trying to move forward but often feel held back in your individual aspirations, it may not be the right fit for you."

3. We thought it was 'cute' when our first loves made suggestions about which friends to avoid or what clothes to wear.

Luis Zambrano

Cavins says, "Excessively possessive behaviors are another red flag that people often ignore easily when they fall in love for the first time. People tend to justify such behaviors by citing that it's due to love or protective instincts." I'm all for being in a relationship where your partner's able to see different sides of a picture, but controlling behavior shouldn't come with that. What might that look like?

Cavins says, "Your partner may frequently check in on you, offer opinions on who you should spend time with, or subtly pressure you into making choices that suit them." For example, your partner could start off making suggestions about your style that slowly morph into them controlling everything you wear. Somehow I went from being a self-professed 'girly-girl' to trying to emulate the style of 'sneakerheads' in a short amount of time. Though I love wearing everything from New Balance to Niké sneakers now, it's in a way that feels cohesive with my style.

You may have brushed this kind of behavior off because, again, you thought it meant your first love wanted the best for you. "It is understandable that such behavior hypothetically may come off as pleasant or affirming; however, they often signal an unhealthy dynamic of control rather than mutual respect," says

4. We always gave in when our first loves forced us to be affectionate.

Adely

*Sigh* I'm shaking my head for my younger self because there were many times I didn't advocate for myself in my first romantic relationship. I'd often give in to affectionate or intimate moments despite wanting personal space so I wouldn't be seen as 'boring' or uninterested in my ex. Menon says, "Given the infatuation, your first relationship can feel all-consuming and often is codependent. Hence, this may result in you overlooking that your partner does not respect your boundaries or desire for personal space."

Partly because the excitement of the relationship makes you want to spend all of your time together, until you don't. And then, it is often too late to correct a maladaptive historical pattern.

4. We always made excuses for why our partners would shower us with affection only to ignore us days later.

Pavel Danilyuk

Let's be clear, 'love bombing' feels confusing and awful. No one should make you feel like you're the center of their universe only to ignore your calls or texts days later. But, this probably happened while you were with your first love. Cavins says, "There's a tendency for people to brush off their first love's emotional unavailability. When, for example, a partner is not responsive and not engaging in intimate discussions or does not express their feelings, some may rationalize this as them being 'just not ready.'" If that were the case, this person wouldn't have made you feel like being with you is something they truly wanted.

Of that, Cavins believes "it's important to recognize these behaviors early" because "they can result in a one-side emotional investment that leaves one party feeling unfulfilled in the long run." Sadly, my first love would have days where he was super sweet to me only to feel like I was smothering him with attention. This is also the same person who begged me to remain in our romantic relationship when he went to basic training although I felt it would be better if we chose to be friends. Imagine my surprise (and hurt) when he told me we should have an open relationship months after getting stationed for the first time.

I should've known better because he was never 100% on board with the idea of marriage until after he graduated from basic training. Cavins calls this "emotional disconnectedness." His further explanation is this is "when the initial chemistry between the partners subsides that emotional attachment matters." To avoid this, he feels "identifying and addressing any of these is critical in a case where you are looking to create a strong and healthy bond."

5. We ignored the ways our former partner blamed us whenever they got in trouble with their parents or an authority figure.

Ketut Subiyanto

Did your first love have a hard time taking responsibility for things that went wrong by gaslighting you to absorb the blow of their mistakes? If you've furiously nodding, we should start a support group. Cavins says, "A key sign is a lack of personal or relational growth. Healthy relationships encourage mutual development, but if one partner stays stuck in old patterns while the other grows, it can create frustration and distance."

At no point should you be the reason why your first love got in trouble after answering their parents' house phone late at night after telling you to call at a certain time. It's situations like this that should've alerted us to awful behavior, but I can see how easy it is to dismiss things.

What if I'm in love for the first time and recognize these signs?

Andrea Piacquadio

First, my heart goes out to you for being in a relationship that doesn't feel healthy. It hurts when we realize the person we thought was so great is anything but. The road to letting go of idealization may be long, but you can and will get better. Cavins says, "In the process of self-healing and recovery, the first step that must be taken is self-reflection. Ask yourself all of the necessary questions that arise, such as what this relationship means for you, what your boundaries are, and what this partnership has revealed about you as an individual."

I keep saying this, but relying on journal prompts can help you unpack a lot of things and, thankfully, Cavins agrees. He says, "You could always opt to talk to a specialist or being journaling in order to find some closure and draw meaning from the experience." Also, he wants you to start "making new memories." But, don't be passive about it.

"You will have to engage yourself in activities that will help redirect the focus of your thoughts. This could include joining a new class, engaging in a hobby, or traveling that involves some independence. These experiences can help shift your mindset from loss to growth and reinforce your identity outside of the relationship," says Cavins.

Another important thing you can do is "solicit help from others," according to him. "Calling on people you trust, like friends and family, to talk about these feelings can significantly help in healing," he says. This also helped me navigate life outside of my first real romantic relationship, reminding me that I still had a lot of love in my life that didn't begin or end with my ex.

Here are Menon's tips:

  • Let yourself grieve — Let this loss run its course. If you need to feel angry, sad, distraught, nostalgic. Allow yourself the full breadth of this experience. If I ask you right now "don't think a out a yellow monkey", I can bet you just thought of a yellow monkey. We call this "the imp of the mind". When you reject feelings, or thoughts, they come back 10 times more fiercely. To move the feeling along, we must let ourselves experience it.
  • Rediscover your identity (So important) — Your first love is often intertwined with self-discovery, and identity formation. Reconsider your goals, interests, values, friendships and hobbies and try to build your own sense of identity and individuality.

Anastasia Nagibina

I saw my first love again and it feels like we're falling in love all over. Can we have a happy and healthy relationship?

I'm not going to tell you to run even though I told my ex I never wanted to speak or talk to him again. You could easily reconnect with the first person you fell in love with and realize that you're both in a place where you can have something beautiful. However, Cavins and Menon want you to be mindful if you're in this position.

"Reconnection is possible," begins Menon, "if both parties can objectively claim that they have grown emotionally and resolved the issues that held their relationship back." But, "if the reconnection is built on one person growing and the other not, it is likely to fail," she alerts. You'll need to "proceed with caution," she says because "your first love was a nostalgic era in your life that can cloud your judgement." To put it more clearly, she doesn't want you confuse "the fuzzies" with a "true knowing that the two of you can make it work."

Cavins says, "Reconnecting with a first love can trigger a strong wave of emotions, but it is important that such a decision is made with caution and a strong sense of pragmatism. Personal growth is a primary factor. Each party in the relationship must ask themselves how they have grown and evolved as individuals over time. If past patterns of conflict, immaturity, or unhealthy dynamics remain unaddressed, the same issues could resurface."

He wants you to consider these things:

  • Are there any active relationships or past engagements that would make it rather difficult? That's because the feelings that come with reigniting old flames are very strong and can alter a person’s life, making it essential to start thinking from all angles before going ahead with it.
  • Address previous challenges that caused the breakup in the first place. If the reasons behind the breakup have been resolved or do not exist anymore, then yes, meeting again has its prospects. However, keep in mind that, at times, memories can be selective and unfavorably distort the truth by overplaying the good qualities while avoiding the negative ones.
  • Only rekindle things if both individuals are in a healthy emotional state and the decision is grounded in practical, mutual considerations—not just sentimentality or romanticized memories. Clear and honest discussions and an understanding of purpose are vital in ascertaining if rekindling the relationship will be worthwhile for both parties or if it will simply be an act of revisiting unresolved emotions.

Menon's final piece of advice is similar in that she encourages you to be "self-critical, self-aware, and self-nourishing." She doesn't want you to be afraid to be "clear and transparent about your expectations for the relationship" either. Though we weren't a fan of the outcomes of our first real romantic relationships, they've made us wiser. So, shout out to our first loves for being the worst because they've become our best learning lessons.

That's not all! We have even more helpful articles about relationships & family if you're looking for everything from celebrity couples to navigating hard conversations during the holidays.

No matter how many times I rewatch The Vampire Diaries, there's nothing like seeing a cast reunion — and the weekend of December 6, we finally got to see our three favorite Mystic Falls gals together again! Nina Dobrev, Kat Graham, and Candice King were just some of The Vampire Diaries cast members who reunited for Epic Con to chat all things Elena, Bonnie, and Caroline...but things took a turn in the middle of the interview when one of the backdrops almost fell on Nina!

Keep reading to see what happened during The Vampire Diaries cast reunion with Nina Dobrev, Kat Graham, and Candice King.

www.tiktok.com

Even after all these years, Bonnie and Caroline are still saving Elena #tvd #thevampirediaries #ninadobrev #candiceking #katgraham #elanagilbert #carolineforbes #bonniebennett #epiccons

As someone who's done plenty of interviews myself, I know how fast a situation can spiral — and this interview accident is crazy. While talking on stage about the show, one of the backdrops begins to lean forward, and right before it falls on top of Nina, Candice and Kat quickly move to push it in the opposite direction.

"I don't want to see any 'Bonnie saves the day' memes," Kat jokes, referencing the fandom's love for Bonnie consistently helping the group throughout the show's eight-season run. "I don't want to see it, I don't want to hear it!" You can also see a relieved Nina hug Candice before revealing she thought it was a spider!

www.instagram.com

In addition to this "Bonnie saves the day" moment (sorry, Kat, I couldn't help it!), the internet went crazy when Nina posted a video of her, Candice, and Kat recreating a photo they took during season 1 — especially after rumors have circulated for years that Kat Graham was mistreated on The Vampire Diaries set.

While these rumors have never been outright confirmed, fans have paid very special attention to what Kat has said...especially when she confirmedshe was the lowest-paid cast member and cried over her natural hair after revealing she wasn't really allowed to have an afro while filming.

"Love you girls so much!!!!!! 🥹❤️❤️❤️❤️" Kat commented on Nina's post, while a fan added, "And now the rumors can definitely be ended 🫶🏼❤️." These women are so powerful and clearly love each other so much, and I will take any and every cast reunion we can get!

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When Brit + Co caught up with Ian Somerhalder, he also expressed how much he loved filming The Vampire Diaries. "Every single day it was a laugh," he says. "I mean we had to be serious, you're running from ghosts and vampires and stuff, and you know, someone makes a fart joke and a 130 people erupt in laughter, there's only so much you can run for your life."

And thank goodness, Ian confirms just how much fun the cast had! "We laughed, that's how we kept each other sane," he says. "I spent 8 years on the show and now it's [been] 15 years. It's my longest relationship."

"I cannot believe it's been 15 years," he continues. "And so everyone who's seen the show, watched the show, supported us — and me — in any way, shape, and form regarding the show, I thank you from the bottom of my heart."

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