Get Lit Like a Christmas Tree With Aldi’s Wine and Cheese Advent Calendars

Last year, Aldi came out with a Wine Advent Calendar in the U.K. To avoid FOMO, Americans resorted to creating their own DIY versions to count down to Christmas. But now, you won’t have to — for the first time ever in the United States you can get Aldi’s 2018 Wine Advent Calendar ($70) starting November 7. The calendar comes with 24 assorted mini bottles of wine including a red blend, Shiraz, Malbec, Pinot Grigio, Sauvignon Blanc, rosé, and sparkling wines from a variety of regions. Each night you’ll get to taste a different mini bottle of wine.

For non-drinkers and kids out there, Aldi has an Imported Mini Cheese Advent Calendar ($13). This product also hits stores on November 7 and includes a variety of 24 mini pieces of cheese like cheddar, gouda, red Leicester, and edam.

If wine and cheese isn’t your thing but you want in on the Advent calendar action, keep an eye out for monthly Aldi Finds. Each week the store surprises shoppers with 100 new and timely products. Aldi reps informed us that on October 31, three different candy Advent calendars will hit store shelves, and on November 7, a toy Advent calendar will be available for kiddos. You can also expect Aldi to continue to offer seasonal products throughout the holiday season like kitchenware, entertaining essentials, and gifts.

There’s only one catch; once these calendars are gone, they’re gone. Therefore, savvy shoppers, don’t procrastinate getting this item like you may with the rest of your holiday shopping.

Do you want Aldi wine or cheese Advent calendars? Let us know @BritandCo.

(Photos via Aldi)

Brown butter pasta. Wedge salads. Espresso martinis. Actual martinis. What do these foods and bevs all have in common? They make me fancy as ever when I’m chowing down on them.

But there’s one flavor in particular that goes above and beyond in the way of fancy foods, and it just so happens to be featured in one of Trader Joe’s tasty new dips.

Trader Joe's

I’m talkin’ truffle, baby! Not one, but two types of the earthy, richly-umami fungus stars in Trader Joe’s Truffle Dip, and TJ’s fans can’t get enough.

Trader Joe’s Truffle Dip boasts an “exceptionally creamy” base made up of ricotta, parmesan, and cream cheese. Most importantly, it earns its super sophisticated flavor from a blend of black truffle paste and white truffle-infused olive oil. Yeah, I’m obsessed.

@traderjoesobsessed

Trader Joe’s fan account @traderjoesobsessed recently shared all the truffle goodness on their page, with truffle-infused favorites like Truffle Burrata, Truffle Brie, andTruffle Oil joining the ranks. Their followers truly blew up the comment section with lots of love for the famed Truffle Dip

“Come through truffle!!!!🔥❤️,” one person wrote.

“I use this as a pasta 🍝 sauce,” another commenter said. “It's amazing!!”

“I think it’s soooo good with the brioche toasts,” someone else said.

“I buy one every week,” another person commented. “I'm obsessed!”

The Trader Joe’s Truffle Dip is shoppable in stores for just $5.49 for 7.5 ounces of the creamy, dreamy product. It’s the perfect addition to slather on lunch wraps and sandwiches and will definitely make your holiday charcuterie spread shine this year.

No matter how you enjoy it, you’re sure to become absolutely obsessed, too.

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I’ve triedtons of different food trends in my day. From dumping chili oil on ice cream to concocting my very own Sleepy Girl Mocktail, nothing I’ve eaten measures up to the sheer weirdness we saw go viral on social media this year (major side eye to Dua Lipa’s pickle Diet Coke).

These are the top 5 most ridiculous TikTok-viral food trends of 2024 that left us questioning whether they really should’ve gone viral in the first place.

@claudiaeatsgood chamoy pickles are so good😋😩❤️ @Bussin Snacks #chamoypickle#chamoy#chamoypicklekit#bussinsnacks#takis#fruitrollup#mukbang#asmr#asmrmukbang#chamoypicklemukbang#juicy#pickle#mexicancandy♬ original sound - Claudia💕

1. Chamoy Pickles

People couldn't quit it with the chamoy pickles (AKA chickles) this year. I never would've guessed that chamoy, a condiment made from dried fruits, chilies, sugar, and lime juice, would be slathered atop the sourest pickles money can buy.

But the food trend didn't stop at just chamoy – many snackers stuffed their pickles with everything from the likes of Hot Cheetos, Takis, and Fruit Roll-Ups. What?!

This insanely sour, tangy treat kickstarted what the internet's coined as the 'Red 40 Diet', which certainly cannot be medically advised.

If you care for your GI tract, this food trend is 100% worth skipping and leaving behind in 2024.

@dualipaofficial

What do we call her?

♬ original sound - Dua Lipa

2. Pickle + Jalapeño-Infused Diet Coke

Diet Coke, pickle juice, and jalapeño juice = all the ingredients needed to concoct Dua Lipa's controversial 2024 drink. She loves it, but I on the other hand, do not.

Now, don't get me wrong: I love a good unexpected flavor combo, but gulping down a simultaneous dose of both pickle juice and jalapeño juice was not tasty to me whatsoever.

This trend even sparked a slew of Sonic diners to start ordering their soft drinks with pickles – but as divisive as this trend can be ("Don’t knock it till you try it," TikToker Mississippi Memaw told Food and Wine), it's just flat out weird.

@logagm

New cucumber recipe 🚨

♬ original sound - Logan

3. Cucumber Salad

If you bought a mandolin slicer recently, you might as well admit you're a victim of the TikTok-viral cucumber salad trend that made its rounds this year.

"Sometimes you need to eat an entire cucumber," TikTok user @logagmsounds off in the intro of every single one of his cucumber salad videos. And thus, the food trend was born.

It felt like I couldn't go a day on TikTok without seeing at least 5 recipes for a damn cucumber salad. When it comes down to it, I can appreciate the novelty (and taste) of this trend, but not the oversaturation. I'm gonna eat an entire cucumber one day, and get so tired of it the next. New innovations in 2025, please!

@kylekruegerr Would you try these?😂 #foodreview#seagrapes#food#review#tastetest#weirdfood♬ original sound - Kyle Krueger

4. Sea Grapes

It was like people wanted to eat the weirdest, grossest things in 2024. I can't blame 'em, especially if it's for clicks and views. But this food trend in particular literally made me want to gag – and I was only watching people eat through a screen (any fellow ASMR fans out there?).

They don't look like they're supposed to be crunchy, but they are. Sea grapes grow from aquatic plants and are filled with essentially what is a "salty liquid." They burst in the mouth when you eat them (one TikToker called them 'edible Orbeez'). Yuck.

@julieta.asmr I figured it out!! Blooper at the end 🥴 #asmr#asmrcommunity#asmrtiktoks#asmrvideo#asmrsounds#asmreating#asmrfood#asmrfyp#asmrmukbang#mukbang#asmreatingsounds♬ original sound - Julieta ASMR 🍒

5. Exploding Candies

The final (and especially weird) food trend I propose we leave behind in 2024 is these dang exploding jelly candies. They also made their rounds on ASMR TikTok, and I truly cannot stand to watch a single video featuring them.

First off, they look so annoying to consume. The fruit-shaped jellies are contained in a thin layer of plastic that's meant to burst open when you sink your teeth into it, prompting you to slurp out the sweetness inside. But what irks me the most is the fact that many people trying them can't even break the seal.

I'd rather watch someone make a simple PB&J than go to town on these microplastic-infused candies.

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There are almost as many Christmas Eve dinner ideas as there are cuisines. And that's a good thing, because you can't expect to power through Santa's big night on Christmas cookieand cocktail recipes alone (as delicious as that actually sounds right now). Your house may be the kind to appreciate some Christmas Eve buffet menu ideas. Or perhaps dinner options to eat in your PJs is what you and your loved ones are after. Whatever your style is, here are 50 recipes for a Christmas Eve spread that will put a spring in your step when you roll out of bed Christmas Day.

STARTERS

The Real Food Dietitians

Whipped Feta Dip With Roasted Olives

Go easy on yourself this holiday with this Mediterranean-inspired dip that takes just minutes to make! (via The Real Food Dietitians)

Clean Cuisine

Savory Stuffed Mushrooms

Serve these party-appropriate stuffed mushrooms made with cheese, peppers, and fresh herbs. (via Clean Cuisine)

Averie Cooks

Antipasto Tree

Turn your charcuterie board ingredients into a festive tree with mozzarella cheese, olives, pepperoncini peppers, and fresh rosemary! (via Averie Cooks)

Damn Delicious

Prosciutto Wrapped Asparagus

This veggie side is super simple, calling for just two ingredients and 10 minutes of prep work. Throw them in a skillet right before showtime and let the prosciutto get nice and crisp while the asparagus turns bright green and tender. They turn out perfect every time, trust us. (via Damn Delicious)

Kitchen Gidget

Puerto Rican Papas Rellenas

There's nothing more tasty on earth than crispy potato croquettes, unless it's potato croquettes stuffed with savory picadillo. Prepare for the onslaught, because *everyone* is going to want this Christmas Eve dinner menu idea. (via Kitchen Gidget)

This Wife Cooks

Red Onion Dip

Kick your guests' tastebuds in gear with this easy and delicious dip! (via This Wife Cooks)

Fake Ginger

Maple Pecan Baked Brie

Baked brie is so ooey-gooey delicious that it's definitely one of our favorite Christmas Eve dishes, and this one calls for ingredients you probably already have on hand. Serve it as an appetizer with a crisp white wine or in place of rolls at the table. It's always a crowd pleaser and goes great with dessert. (via Fake Ginger)

Brit + Co

Bacon Pastry Twists + Beer Cheese Dip

It doesn't have to be a game day to enjoy the this tasty Christmas Eve food idea. Serve these appetizers to everyone before dinner, or snack on them as you're preparing the rest of the food. Either way, you'll love this recipe! (Brit + Co)

Delicious Christmas Dinner Side Dishes

Brit + Co

Creamy, Cheesy Gratin

With sweet potatoes, Gruyère, cream, and sage all mixed in together, this is one easy Christmas Eve dinner dish (or Christmas brunch idea) that you'll never leave off your holiday menu ever again. (via Brit + Co)

Crowded Kitchen

Shaved Brussels Sprout Salad with Pomegranate and Candied Pecans

This shaved Brussels sprout salad with pomegranate, candied pecans and a lemon dijon vinaigrette went viral and is perfect for potlucks! (via Crowded Kitchen)

Hello Little Home

Sourdough Stuffing

This vegetarian stuffing is easy and loaded with flavor, making it perfect for your Christmas feast! (via Hello Little Home)

Kathryn's Kitchen

Creamy Stovetop Mac and Cheese

Skip the box in favor of this homemade recipe that takes less than 30 minutes! (via Kathryn's Kitchen)

Feel Good Foodie

Kale Pear Salad with Candied Walnuts

This kale salad is loaded with pears, and cranberries, topped with walnuts, and blue cheese with a homemade vinaigrette, making it perfect for the holiday table. (via Feel Good Foodie)

Brit + Co

Roasted Butternut Squash Salad

Butternut squash is one of those seasonal foods that's perfect in salads and adds a bit of weight to any Christmas Eve recipe. (via Brit + Co)

Brit + Co

Pumpkin Curry

This side dish can also serve as a main course for any plant-based eaters around your dinner table this Christmas Eve. The flavors of pumpkin and vegetables keep things light and bright, while the spicy curry will warm you to your toes. (via Brit + Co)

Brit + Co

A Green Bean Casserole for Every Dietary Need

Green bean casserole is so tasty that everyone should be able to enjoy it! With mushroom sauce, beans, and plenty of vegan and gluten-free swaps, this dish will be a Christmas favorite. (via Brit + Co)

Brit + Co

Slow Cooker French Onion Soup

There's nothing quite as cozy as a bowl of warm soup on Christmas Eve, and this slow cooker version is about as convenient as it gets. More time for wrapping presents! (via Brit + Co)

Half Baked Harvest

Crockpot Salsa Verde Chicken Pozole

This green pozole is bubbling over with the goodness of peppers and tomatillos, zucchini and sweet corn, avocado and cotija cheese — with fresh baked tortilla strips and roasted pumpkin seeds on top. One bite and your taste buds will be singing hallelujah! (via Half Baked Harvest)

Brit + Co

Romanesco Holiday Trees With Parmesan Snow

If you need a festive and easy Christmas Eve dinner idea, think of these pointy florets like miniature Christmas trees. Set them in a creamy cheese sauce and dust with Parmesan for a snowy (and tasty) side dish for your dinner. (via Brit + Co)

Vikalinka

Pan Fried Zucchini with Basil and Pecorino

Side dishes don't have to be underwhelming before your big Christmas dinner. Whip up this delicious pan of fried zucchini with basil and Pecorino Romano cheese that will make your guests ask for the recipe! (via Vikalinka)

Averie Cooks

Sweet Potato Cornbread

If you can't wait until Christmas to treat your family something sweet, make this sweet potato cornbread to go with your meal! You can either serve it as a side dish or treat it like dessert. (via Averie Cooks)

Seasons and Suppers

Make-Ahead Mashed Potatoes

Make-ahead sides are a real life saver at holiday time. These potatoes are whipped up with cream cheese, sour cream and eggs, so you can keep them in the fridge until the very last minute and they'll bake up to perfection, casserole style. (via Seasons and Suppers)

Bowl of Delicious

Maple Roasted Brussels Sprouts With Bacon

Toss Brussels sprouts with bacon grease, maple syrup, salt, and pepper, then roast until perfectly crispy and browned. So tasty! (via Bowl of Delicious)

The Iron You

The Best Baked Spinach Rice

This rice casserole is rich with three kinds of cheese, spices and lemon zest. Make a double batch and hold one back in the fridge for leftovers; you'll be thanking yourself amid tomorrow's wrapping paper frenzy. (via The Iron You)

Carlsbad Cravings

Secret Ingredient Honey Garlic Roasted Carrots

The trick to feeding a crowd with your Christmas Eve meal ideas is to make a meat or fish entreé with a plethora of easy and tasty sides. Well… nothing could be easier than these carrots that caramelize slowly to perfection in a balsamic glaze in a low-heat oven. This is one sweet veg you won't have to beg the kids to eat. (via Carlsbad Cravings)

The Best Christmas Dinner Main Courses

MAIN COURSES

Brit + Co

Cranberry-Glazed Roast Turkey

Make a turkey full of the flavors of the season with this simple, easy-to-follow recipe. (via Brit + Co)

A Spicy Perspective

Baked Ham with Brown Sugar Ham Glaze

Made with a flavorful brandy and brown sugar glaze, this baked ham is the perfect main dish for Christmas. (via A Spicy Perspective)

Brit + Co

Crisp, Golden Turkey

Here's everything you need to know about prepping, roasting, and serving the best bird you'll eat this year. You'll learn how to thought and season the turkey, as well as everything else you need in the kitchen to prepare it just right. (via Brit + Co)

Julia Frey of Vikalinka

Mushroom Wellington

Not just for vegetarians at the table, this Mushroom Wellington, flavored with roasted garlic, thyme and Parmesan cheese, then baked in flaky puff pastry, is an everyone pleaser! (via Julia Frey of Vikalinka)

The Original Dish

Spiced Rack of Lamb With Citrus Salad

Racks of lamb served with a fresh, vibrant citrus salad is a unique, refreshing take on holiday dinner. (via The Original Dish)

NeighborFood

Garlic Rosemary Prime Rib Roast With Horseradish Cream

Prime rib is always a showstopper, but the real star of this show is the homemade horseradish sauce. It cuts right through the richness of the beef, adding just the right amount of savory zing to this Christmas Eve dinner recipe. (via NeighborFood)

Donna Hay

Vegetable Béchamel Lasagna

If you haven't had lasagna made the old school way, with béchamel sauce instead of cheese, you are in for a *tasty* treat. This is one meatless dish even the carnivores in the house will be clamoring for — definitely add it to your Christmas eve dinner menu! (via Donna Hay)

Half Baked Harvest

White Wine Miso Braised Pot Roast

Slow-cook a beef pot roast braised in wine with onions, carrots, and fresh thyme, serve it alongside creamy mashed potatoes for a one-pot meal that’ warms a holiday crowd. (via Half Baked Harvest)

Iowa Girl Eats

Crock Pot Mojo Pork With Cuban-Style Black Beans

This pork shoulder is cooked the traditional way — in a tasty citrus trio of orange, lemon and lime juice, spiked with onion, jalapeño, herbs, spices and an entire head of garlic. Start it in the morning and it will bubble away happily in your slow cooker all day, giving you time (and counter space) to get the rest of the feast prepared. (via Iowa Girl Eats)

No. 2 Pencil

Slow Cooker Ham With Maple Brown Sugar Glaze

Ham is one of those hearty dishes that's great for feeding a crowd, but it's actually pretty tricky to get it just right. This recipe uses the slow cooker to your advantage, gently heating the meat all day in delectable juices without ever drying it out. Serve it in slices the next day for a Christmas morning breakfast add-on. (via No. 2 Pencil)

Two Peas and Their Pod

Beef Stroganoff

This 30-minute meal makes a great holiday main with tender strips of beef, mushrooms, and a rich and creamy sauce, serve dover egg noodles or mashed potatoes. (via Two Peas And Their Pod)

Salt & Lavender

Ranch Pork Tenderloin

If you're making a whole feast, this 30-minute meal with the tastiest gravy and tender and juicy pork would be the perfect addition! (via Salt & Lavender)

Pinch of Yum

Carnitas Tamale Pie

Christmas Eve menu ideas for a buffet cannot be complete without pie! Tamales are a tradition this time of year, but you know the old saying: It takes a village! If you're craving the flavor but dreading the assembly line, your new go-to recipe has arrived. (via Pinch of Yum)

Nerds With Knives

Lasagna Bolognese With Fontina Béchamel

Sometimes you want to mark a special occasion with a challenging dish. This lasagna bolognese is made completely from scratch, including the pasta, and your guests will appreciate that effort with every delicious bite they take. (via Nerds With Knives)

Crystal & Co.

Easiest Ever Lasagna Roll Up Recipe

When you love the *thought* of made-from-scratch lasagna but you just don't have the time, roll ups to the rescue! This Christmas Eve party menu idea is jump-started using store-bought ingredients, but no one will ever taste the difference. (via Crystal & Co.)

Host The Toast

Crock Pot General Tso's Chicken

Do you have fond memories of Chinese takeout on Christmas Eve? Before you dive into your Christmas desserts, serve up this crockpot version of everyone's fave, which tastes every bit as good as the real thing in case you were wondering. (via Host The Toast)

Christmas Eve Food Directly from the Sea

A Spicy Perspective

Lobster Fra Diavolo

When it comes to seafood, lobster is the crème de la crème. This Christmas Eve recipe, flavored the old fashioned way with clam juice and cognac, is sure to impress everyone at your holiday party table. (via A Spicy Perspective)

Nicky's Kitchen Sanctuary

Fish Pie With Cheesy Mash

Nothing beats a creamy fish pie when the *crust* is made of mashed taters. Here's a meal that's guaranteed to taste better if you eat it in your jammies followed by your favorite holiday cocktail. (via Nicky's Kitchen Sanctuary)

Saveur

Whole Roasted Branzino With Fennel and Onions

Whole roasted fish dishes are an Italian tradition on feast days. While this one looks like a culinary work of art sitting on your table, it actually comes together easily and calls for just seven ingredients. (via Saveur)

Christmas Eve Sweet Treats

Completely Delicious

Gingerbread Layer Cake with Cream Cheese Buttercream

This stunning gingerbread layer cake with cream cheese buttercream is surprisingly easy to make and perfect for the holidays! (via Completely Delicious)

Vanilla and Bean

Dark Chocolate Shortbread Cookies

Indulge in a cookie dessert that is delicious and not at all hard to make! (via Vanilla and Bean)

The Fast Recipe

Cookies With Strawberry Jam

Make these quick and easy thumbprint cookies with only five ingredients. (via The Fast Recipe)

Barley & Sage

Black Forest Cupcakes

For a decadent and delicious twist on holiday dessert, try these chocolate cupcakes with cherry filling and whipped cream. (via Barley & Sage)

Averie Cooks

Mini Cinnamon Sugar Pumpkin Muffins

These sweet fall treats are sure to become a fan-favorite when you serve them as part of your Christmas Eve dinner. (via Averie Cooks)

Completely Delicious

Fry Bread with Cinnamon Butter Honey

This recipe makes us think about funnel cake combined with yummy cinnamon butter honey. (via Completely Delicious)

Love these Christmas Eve dinner ideas? Follow us on Pinterest and check out our online cooking classes for more inspo.

This post has been updated with additional reporting by Jasmine Williams.

Featured image via Half Baked Harvest

First loves are TOUGH — especially when you start to see all the red flags you missed along the way once it's over. If you've been dissecting your own early love stories by reading Reddit threads or chatting with your girlfriends about their own relationship experiences, just know this: you're not alone! The entire Brit + Co staff even found ourselves discussing the first person we ever fell in love with...and the recounts did not disappoint. From realizing 19 seemed to be a common age for our all-time worst relationships to understanding how our first love was probably not as ideal as we originally thought, it made us wonder why we couldn't pinpoint red flags back then.

Licensed Psychotherapist Prerna Menon, founder of Boundless, LCSW-PLLC and Licensed marriage and family therapist Joseph Cavins, LMFT have a few thoughts that have helped us decode the precarious time in our lives.

Here's why some of us ignored how awful our first love might've been

1. We thought our first love was perfect and would argue with anyone who wanted us to take things slow with them.

Savannah Dematteo

I'll never forget the first time I fell in love at 19. I thought my ex was the "wind beneath my wings" because he had a great sense of humor and was creative like me. I told myself he was the person I was going to marry so I was offended when my parents didn't think he was mature enough to be in a serious relationship. If this sounds familiar, pull up a chair because Menon explains why we tend to idealize our first love.

"Your first love is your first experience with romantic love too, hence you typically see it with rose-colored glasses. The overwhelming emotion is often infatuation, which tends to overshadow the more critical and analytical part of our brain," she says. Sadly, this sounds like something my parents told me before but I couldn't fathom how true it was as a teen.

As the Clinical Director at Southern California Sunrise Recovery Center, Cavins has seen this play out before too. He says, "In your first relationship, there is a tendency to put your partner on a pedestal. The excitement of new love can create a powerful emotional fog that makes it hard to see flaws clearly."

Essentially, this "excitement of having a boyfriend, girlfriend, or partner supersedes" our ability to questions things we normally wouldn't put up with, according to Menon.

2. We tried to ignore the how many times our first loves disagreed with our values or goals.

Keira Burton

While some couples are able to make their relationship work despite having a different outlook on life, sometimes it can be a sign that things aren't going to work long-term. Cavins says, "One major red flag is disregarding differences in values or goals for the future. For instance, you wish to become a parent someday while your spouse swears this will never happen— or vice versa. Early on, you might dismiss these differences, believing love will conquer all. However, these mismatched priorities can lead to resentment and challenges over time."

Honestly, I probably should've ran whenever my ex would mock my belief in God only for us to have to attend his mother and stepfather's church whenever I visited. There was so much confusion there, but I tried to dismiss it as something he needed time to work out.

Menon adds, "If this relationship makes you feel like you'e standing in quick sand - where you are trying to move forward but often feel held back in your individual aspirations, it may not be the right fit for you."

3. We thought it was 'cute' when our first loves made suggestions about which friends to avoid or what clothes to wear.

Luis Zambrano

Cavins says, "Excessively possessive behaviors are another red flag that people often ignore easily when they fall in love for the first time. People tend to justify such behaviors by citing that it's due to love or protective instincts." I'm all for being in a relationship where your partner's able to see different sides of a picture, but controlling behavior shouldn't come with that. What might that look like?

Cavins says, "Your partner may frequently check in on you, offer opinions on who you should spend time with, or subtly pressure you into making choices that suit them." For example, your partner could start off making suggestions about your style that slowly morph into them controlling everything you wear. Somehow I went from being a self-professed 'girly-girl' to trying to emulate the style of 'sneakerheads' in a short amount of time. Though I love wearing everything from New Balance to Niké sneakers now, it's in a way that feels cohesive with my style.

You may have brushed this kind of behavior off because, again, you thought it meant your first love wanted the best for you. "It is understandable that such behavior hypothetically may come off as pleasant or affirming; however, they often signal an unhealthy dynamic of control rather than mutual respect," says

4. We always gave in when our first loves forced us to be affectionate.

Adely

*Sigh* I'm shaking my head for my younger self because there were many times I didn't advocate for myself in my first romantic relationship. I'd often give in to affectionate or intimate moments despite wanting personal space so I wouldn't be seen as 'boring' or uninterested in my ex. Menon says, "Given the infatuation, your first relationship can feel all-consuming and often is codependent. Hence, this may result in you overlooking that your partner does not respect your boundaries or desire for personal space."

Partly because the excitement of the relationship makes you want to spend all of your time together, until you don't. And then, it is often too late to correct a maladaptive historical pattern.

4. We always made excuses for why our partners would shower us with affection only to ignore us days later.

Pavel Danilyuk

Let's be clear, 'love bombing' feels confusing and awful. No one should make you feel like you're the center of their universe only to ignore your calls or texts days later. But, this probably happened while you were with your first love. Cavins says, "There's a tendency for people to brush off their first love's emotional unavailability. When, for example, a partner is not responsive and not engaging in intimate discussions or does not express their feelings, some may rationalize this as them being 'just not ready.'" If that were the case, this person wouldn't have made you feel like being with you is something they truly wanted.

Of that, Cavins believes "it's important to recognize these behaviors early" because "they can result in a one-side emotional investment that leaves one party feeling unfulfilled in the long run." Sadly, my first love would have days where he was super sweet to me only to feel like I was smothering him with attention. This is also the same person who begged me to remain in our romantic relationship when he went to basic training although I felt it would be better if we chose to be friends. Imagine my surprise (and hurt) when he told me we should have an open relationship months after getting stationed for the first time.

I should've known better because he was never 100% on board with the idea of marriage until after he graduated from basic training. Cavins calls this "emotional disconnectedness." His further explanation is this is "when the initial chemistry between the partners subsides that emotional attachment matters." To avoid this, he feels "identifying and addressing any of these is critical in a case where you are looking to create a strong and healthy bond."

5. We ignored the ways our former partner blamed us whenever they got in trouble with their parents or an authority figure.

Ketut Subiyanto

Did your first love have a hard time taking responsibility for things that went wrong by gaslighting you to absorb the blow of their mistakes? If you've furiously nodding, we should start a support group. Cavins says, "A key sign is a lack of personal or relational growth. Healthy relationships encourage mutual development, but if one partner stays stuck in old patterns while the other grows, it can create frustration and distance."

At no point should you be the reason why your first love got in trouble after answering their parents' house phone late at night after telling you to call at a certain time. It's situations like this that should've alerted us to awful behavior, but I can see how easy it is to dismiss things.

What if I'm in love for the first time and recognize these signs?

Andrea Piacquadio

First, my heart goes out to you for being in a relationship that doesn't feel healthy. It hurts when we realize the person we thought was so great is anything but. The road to letting go of idealization may be long, but you can and will get better. Cavins says, "In the process of self-healing and recovery, the first step that must be taken is self-reflection. Ask yourself all of the necessary questions that arise, such as what this relationship means for you, what your boundaries are, and what this partnership has revealed about you as an individual."

I keep saying this, but relying on journal prompts can help you unpack a lot of things and, thankfully, Cavins agrees. He says, "You could always opt to talk to a specialist or being journaling in order to find some closure and draw meaning from the experience." Also, he wants you to start "making new memories." But, don't be passive about it.

"You will have to engage yourself in activities that will help redirect the focus of your thoughts. This could include joining a new class, engaging in a hobby, or traveling that involves some independence. These experiences can help shift your mindset from loss to growth and reinforce your identity outside of the relationship," says Cavins.

Another important thing you can do is "solicit help from others," according to him. "Calling on people you trust, like friends and family, to talk about these feelings can significantly help in healing," he says. This also helped me navigate life outside of my first real romantic relationship, reminding me that I still had a lot of love in my life that didn't begin or end with my ex.

Here are Menon's tips:

  • Let yourself grieve — Let this loss run its course. If you need to feel angry, sad, distraught, nostalgic. Allow yourself the full breadth of this experience. If I ask you right now "don't think a out a yellow monkey", I can bet you just thought of a yellow monkey. We call this "the imp of the mind". When you reject feelings, or thoughts, they come back 10 times more fiercely. To move the feeling along, we must let ourselves experience it.
  • Rediscover your identity (So important) — Your first love is often intertwined with self-discovery, and identity formation. Reconsider your goals, interests, values, friendships and hobbies and try to build your own sense of identity and individuality.

Anastasia Nagibina

I saw my first love again and it feels like we're falling in love all over. Can we have a happy and healthy relationship?

I'm not going to tell you to run even though I told my ex I never wanted to speak or talk to him again. You could easily reconnect with the first person you fell in love with and realize that you're both in a place where you can have something beautiful. However, Cavins and Menon want you to be mindful if you're in this position.

"Reconnection is possible," begins Menon, "if both parties can objectively claim that they have grown emotionally and resolved the issues that held their relationship back." But, "if the reconnection is built on one person growing and the other not, it is likely to fail," she alerts. You'll need to "proceed with caution," she says because "your first love was a nostalgic era in your life that can cloud your judgement." To put it more clearly, she doesn't want you confuse "the fuzzies" with a "true knowing that the two of you can make it work."

Cavins says, "Reconnecting with a first love can trigger a strong wave of emotions, but it is important that such a decision is made with caution and a strong sense of pragmatism. Personal growth is a primary factor. Each party in the relationship must ask themselves how they have grown and evolved as individuals over time. If past patterns of conflict, immaturity, or unhealthy dynamics remain unaddressed, the same issues could resurface."

He wants you to consider these things:

  • Are there any active relationships or past engagements that would make it rather difficult? That's because the feelings that come with reigniting old flames are very strong and can alter a person’s life, making it essential to start thinking from all angles before going ahead with it.
  • Address previous challenges that caused the breakup in the first place. If the reasons behind the breakup have been resolved or do not exist anymore, then yes, meeting again has its prospects. However, keep in mind that, at times, memories can be selective and unfavorably distort the truth by overplaying the good qualities while avoiding the negative ones.
  • Only rekindle things if both individuals are in a healthy emotional state and the decision is grounded in practical, mutual considerations—not just sentimentality or romanticized memories. Clear and honest discussions and an understanding of purpose are vital in ascertaining if rekindling the relationship will be worthwhile for both parties or if it will simply be an act of revisiting unresolved emotions.

Menon's final piece of advice is similar in that she encourages you to be "self-critical, self-aware, and self-nourishing." She doesn't want you to be afraid to be "clear and transparent about your expectations for the relationship" either. Though we weren't a fan of the outcomes of our first real romantic relationships, they've made us wiser. So, shout out to our first loves for being the worst because they've become our best learning lessons.

That's not all! We have even more helpful articles about relationships & family if you're looking for everything from celebrity couples to navigating hard conversations during the holidays.

No matter how many times I rewatch The Vampire Diaries, there's nothing like seeing a cast reunion — and the weekend of December 6, we finally got to see our three favorite Mystic Falls gals together again! Nina Dobrev, Kat Graham, and Candice King were just some of The Vampire Diaries cast members who reunited for Epic Con to chat all things Elena, Bonnie, and Caroline...but things took a turn in the middle of the interview when one of the backdrops almost fell on Nina!

Keep reading to see what happened during The Vampire Diaries cast reunion with Nina Dobrev, Kat Graham, and Candice King.

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Even after all these years, Bonnie and Caroline are still saving Elena #tvd #thevampirediaries #ninadobrev #candiceking #katgraham #elanagilbert #carolineforbes #bonniebennett #epiccons

As someone who's done plenty of interviews myself, I know how fast a situation can spiral — and this interview accident is crazy. While talking on stage about the show, one of the backdrops begins to lean forward, and right before it falls on top of Nina, Candice and Kat quickly move to push it in the opposite direction.

"I don't want to see any 'Bonnie saves the day' memes," Kat jokes, referencing the fandom's love for Bonnie consistently helping the group throughout the show's eight-season run. "I don't want to see it, I don't want to hear it!" You can also see a relieved Nina hug Candice before revealing she thought it was a spider!

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In addition to this "Bonnie saves the day" moment (sorry, Kat, I couldn't help it!), the internet went crazy when Nina posted a video of her, Candice, and Kat recreating a photo they took during season 1 — especially after rumors have circulated for years that Kat Graham was mistreated on The Vampire Diaries set.

While these rumors have never been outright confirmed, fans have paid very special attention to what Kat has said...especially when she confirmedshe was the lowest-paid cast member and cried over her natural hair after revealing she wasn't really allowed to have an afro while filming.

"Love you girls so much!!!!!! 🥹❤️❤️❤️❤️" Kat commented on Nina's post, while a fan added, "And now the rumors can definitely be ended 🫶🏼❤️." These women are so powerful and clearly love each other so much, and I will take any and every cast reunion we can get!

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When Brit + Co caught up with Ian Somerhalder, he also expressed how much he loved filming The Vampire Diaries. "Every single day it was a laugh," he says. "I mean we had to be serious, you're running from ghosts and vampires and stuff, and you know, someone makes a fart joke and a 130 people erupt in laughter, there's only so much you can run for your life."

And thank goodness, Ian confirms just how much fun the cast had! "We laughed, that's how we kept each other sane," he says. "I spent 8 years on the show and now it's [been] 15 years. It's my longest relationship."

"I cannot believe it's been 15 years," he continues. "And so everyone who's seen the show, watched the show, supported us — and me — in any way, shape, and form regarding the show, I thank you from the bottom of my heart."

What would your dream The Vampire Diaries reunion look like? Let us know on Facebook!