7 Things Bachelorette Contestants Are Doing RIGHT That You’re Prob Doing Wrong

On this, the night of The Bachelorette finale, as Kaitlyn Bristowe chose (spoiler) ugh, totally the wrong guy. I feel the need to explain my own misguided but earnest love of this show. I have a good excuse for why I started watching The Bachelor/ette — work. As an intern for Entertainment Weekly back in 2008, it was necessary that I be up on my reality TV so I dutifully was. I have an even better excuse for why I kept watching — friends. Buds I would have deemed too high brow for a basic cable show about the quest for love (book publishers, social workers, AIDS researchers) organized weekly viewings around a TV and a pizza in a rotating cast of Brooklyn apartments.

When I moved from NY to SF to work for Brit + Co last January, I left my girls and our Monday ritual behind. In the few seasons I took off, the Bachelor/ette(s) went to an island to find love and I to Silicon Valley to search for the same thing in bars and on dating apps. Tuning back in to the show this season to follow Kaitlyn, I saw each episode, every date and all the mascara-tinged tears in a completely new light. Instead of thinking it was “so ridiculous” and “totally made up,” I was pretty humbled by the realness I saw beyond each rose ceremony. Compared to my last year and a half dating about as many men as Kaitlyn gets to whittle down by episode two or three, I was bummed to admit that the guys on the show were better at dating than 90% of the dudes I had grabbed a drink with over the last 18 months and, at times, they were even better than I was at it.

After some deep introspection and DVRing, here are a few things Bachelorette contestants could actually teach us regulars about dating. You might not have Chris Harrison to help you find The One, but maybe my words of television-taught wisdom can guide you on the path to meaningful like like.

1. Be There for the Right Reasons: According to a May study, a crazy 42% of Tinder users are actually in a relationship. GUYS, WTF! Why join a dating app if you’re not actually there to date? I am interested in dating and I don’t even want to use dating apps. What kind of free time do you monsters have?? Is it really the swipe function that’s so intoxicating? If so, let me recommend downloading BuzzFeed’s Cute or Not app which offers the same satisfaction for a fraction of the unmet expectations.

2. Ask Questions: Maybe it’s because the contestants are aware of the cameras rolling. Maybe it’s that they’re well-prepped by producers before each date. Whatever it is, (it’s probably both of those things) it’s refreshing to watch people ask each other questions over dinner and drinks. You know, to like, get to know each other and stuff. When talking to women about what makes a good vs bad date, more often than not a complaint they express to me about their men they’re dating (and, to be fair, I’ve heard this the other way and in same-sex relationships as well) is that the guy just didn’t ask them any questions. Or they did on dates 1 + 2 and then got lazy by date 3. We’ve all witnessed someone (please tell me you saw this story of a woman live tweeting someone’s awful date) sharing their life story without asking nary a Q about their date. Don’t be that guy/girl.

3. Share Your Story: Speaking of sharing life stories, you should do that. In moderation. For a show people like to dismiss as “fake,” being phony on The Bachelor/ette is actually one of the worst offenses that will get you called out by no less than three guys and possibly even Chris H himself. I know some of you might be grossed out by what I’m about to say, but these contestants know their personal brand and it’s easy to see it when they’re telling their potential boo about themselves. Being able to articulate your path and what made you who you are today makes you seem confident and real. Even if your teeth are unnaturally white.

4. Go on Fun Dates: I AM GUILTY OF NOT ABIDING BY THIS RULE. I get it; it’s tough. If you’ve ever been catfished by an OKCupider who doesn’t really look like their photos (cough), it’s difficult to commit to much more than a happy hour drink en route to emergency escape plans. If you’re feeing good about a suitor, play producer and plan a date worth going on. EVEN if that date is just to a bar, make it a favorite, a secret spot that inspires a great story — at leeeast something with Big Buck Hunter in case you run out of things to talk about. If this works out, you’ll have all your life to crack open a beer, order Thai and stay in so try jumpstarting your honeymoon period with something more than $2 PBR.

5. Wear a Gown/Suit and Tie: While this is one of the silliest things about the show — especially The Bachelor, where this visual phenom is multiplied by David’s Bridal dresses for days — there is something legitimately nice about seeing someone wearing their Sunday best on a Saturday date. I’ve shown up for a date wearing a dress to be greeted by a 30-something man wearing (sigh) a hoodie, graphic tee and flip flops. I’m no snob, but take this season of The Bachelorette as proof that a first impression (specifically, a First Impression Rose) can mean something real.

6. Know You’re Not That Deep: There’s an area on OKCupid that suggests “You should message me if…” One of my favorite things I’ve ever seen in that little box is from someone who answered: “that there’s something on your profile that you’re a little bit embarrassed about.”

Taking oneself too seriously is the opposite of sexy. Just ask the guy who got sent home without the comfort of a rose ceremony for being “too deep.” That’s not the ‘tude America falls in love with, Ian.

7. If You Don’t Want to Date Someone, Let Them Know: Crazy, right?! This one will seem obvious to adult humans out there, but probably not adult humans who date regularly. No, you might not have the opportunity to line up all of your suitors in a mansion like they’re in a v fancy, possibly haunted elementary school chorus, guide out the ones you’re not willing to spend a night in a fantasy suite with and let them cry it out in a limo. What you do have though, is the opportunity to call, text, email, face time with a person you’re dating or have gone on dates with to let them know where you’re at.

Bonus: “What I felt for you was greater than a moment.” – Nick, you win for best response to an ill-timed breakup.

(Photos via ABC)

We've been talking about discovering the best drugstore mascaras, matte lipsticks and brow gels, but did you know you're supposed to replace your makeup products annually? This is one of those things TikTok gets right because beauty doesn't have an immortal shelf life. If you're getting the ick thinking about that trusty concealer you've used the last few years, we don't blame you!

Before you start rage or panic-cleaning, I chatted with the experts to understand what to replace — and when you should replace them! After hearing from Shawnelle Prestidge (Makeup Artist and Founder/CEO of PRESTIDGE beauté) and Joey Healy(Advanced Esthetican and Founder of Joey Healy Eyebrow Collection), I feel way more confident with my beauty cabinet. Here's what you need to know!

TL;DR

  • You can find a product's PAO (period after opening) date — AKA expiration date — on the back of the packaging.
  • Mascaras and eyeliners have the shortest shelf lives, and they should be replaced around every 3 months.
  • Foundation and concealers should be replaced once a year.
  • Lipsticks can be replaced once a year, but lip glosses can last up to 18 months.
  • Powder-based products can last a year and a half to two years.
  • Nail polishes are good for up to three years.
  • Fragrances start to break down after five years.

How can someone check the expiration date for their makeup?

Rachel Weeks

How many times have you picked up your order from Sephora or Ulta without looking at every detail of your makeup products? We're guilty of being more concerned about adding something to our routine too so don't feel like you're being called out! If you're not 100% sure how to start being mindful about something's shelf life, Prestidge and Healy want to let you in on a little secret.

"It's actually pretty simple. There's something called a PAO symbol, which stands for 'period after opening.' You'll find it on the exterior of makeup products — sometimes on the product itself but always on the box," he says. Wondering what it looks like? Healy says, "The PAO symbol looks like a small jar with a number followed by the letter 'M,' which stands for months. For example, '3M' means three months, '6M' means six months, and '12M' means twelve months."

Prestidge also adds, "Brands often print batch codes that consumers can input into websites like CheckCosmetic to determine the production date." If you've yet to open your product, Healy says "A good rule of thumb is to assume it will last about twice as long. So, if the PAO says '6M,' the product is good for six months after opening and likely up to twelve months if unopened."

Do some makeup products have a longer shelf life than others?

Tima Miroshnichenko

Based on what Healy shares, it's evident different makeup products have longer shelf lives than others, and there are plenty of different factors that determine why. "Products like mascara and eyeliner, which are used around the eyes and tend to be liquids or creams, typically have the shortest shelf life due to their risk of bacterial growth. You should replace them every three months," he says. Excuse us while we collectively clutch our pearls.

Now that we've caught our breath, we can breathe a sigh of relief because Healy says that's the only products we have to replace a little quicker. "Foundation and concealer, which are also liquids, can usually last up to a year. Lipstick is good for about a year, while lip gloss can last around 18 months," he shares. Still, Prestidge feels you should be especially mindful of liquid and cream products because their shorter lifespans are attributed to "their high water content which fosters bacteria."

For those of us who love other face products, we have an even longer time to replace them. "Powders, like brow powders, bronzers, and blushes, have a much longer shelf life — usually a year and a half to two years," Healy explains. Prestidge says this is because "they contain fewer ingredients prone to bacterial growth." And for good measure, Healy shares we can keep nail polish for "three years before it becomes dry and clumpy," and fragrances for "five years before they start to break down."

What are the top signs it's time to replace makeup?

Element5 Digital

Not always good at keeping track of when you bought your makeup? No worries — there are some key signs you can recognize that your makeup is likely expired. Healy points out you'll be able to see that "the formula may have shifted or separated, or the product may have dried." More often than not, both he and Prestidge agree expired products will often smell rancid. "For example, brow gel can smell musty if it's been sitting unused for a year. If you're unsure, it's better to throw it out," encourages Healy.

Not only that, but Prestidge says to pay attention to your product's color. "If the product's color shifts, it's a a sign it's degraded," she says. Also, your skin will let you know when expired products are irritating it. "If you notice itching, redness, or breakouts after using a product, it might be expired, she alerts.

To avoid this, go an extra step further by using a "label maker to note the purchase date on your products, or keep a record in your phone," suggests Healy. This will help lessen the chance you're using something that's full of harmful bacteria.

What can happen if someone keeps using expired makeup?

Polina Tankilevitch

There are some things we'd love for you to be rebellious about, but using old makeup isn't one of them. Healy feels the same way and says, "Using expired makeup increases your risk of infection and irritation, which can lead to unsanitary conditions and even bacterial contamination."

The last thing we want is for you to get sick because you didn't want to let go of something. While symptoms may not always be as severe — Prestige says you could see allergic reactions, redness, or acne — Healy reminds us that "at the worst, it could result in serious infections that require treatment." This could look like developing styes or pink eye if you're "using old mascara or eyeliner," according to Prestidge.

Plus, your makeup won't give you the look you're going for if it's expired. "Expired products may no longer perform as intended, compromising coverage, color, or longevity," she says. Healy's ultimate advice? "Always be cautious, check for the PAO symbol, and replace products when needed."

Beauty Products You Need To Replace Every 3 Months

Amazon

Lancôme Lash Idôle Volumizing Mascara

If you're going to replace your mascara, you need a comparable alternative that's going to give your lashes the length and volume you're used to having. Be sure to add this one to your cart today!

Amazon

Urban Decay Glide-On Eye Pencil

Knowing that eyeliners go near your precious eyes, you'll want something that has a waterproof and smudge-proof formula like Urban Decay's Glide-On Pencil. You'll get up to 24 hours of wear that'll make you glad you decided to go for this option.

Beauty Products To Replace Every One To Two Years

Amazon

ILIA True Skin Serum Foundation

If you're going to wear foundation, you should opt for something that feels like your skin. The medium coverage feels weightless and has a good dose of niacinamide and allantoin in it to help improve your texture over time.

Amazon

e.l.f. Hydrating Camo Concealer

Get all the benefits of a high quality concealer without the luxury price with this $7 formula. It's hydrating so you're less likely to experience any creasing when you're trying to set it with your favorite powder.

Amazon

Revlon ColorStay Suede Ink Lipstick

Give those lips a boost of color with Revlon's ColorStay Suede Ink Lipstick! You're going to get the best wear out of this no-transfer shade that has powerful pigment that doesn't cost more than $15.

Amazon

NYX Professional Makeup Fat Lip Oil

Want juicy lips that don't feel sticky? You have to get this fat lip oil. You'll get up to 12 hours of wear that doesn't require you to reapply it which sounds like the very thing we could all use.

Amazon

IT Cosmetics Bye Bye Pores Pressed Powder

Headed to an event and want an airbrushed look that makes jaws drop? You'll be hard-pressed not to have this pancake-type powder. It visibly minimizes your pores while also soaking up excess oils.

Amazon

Physician's Formula Butter Bronzer

This yummy bronzer had us at hypoallergenic. It's going to give you a sun-kissed glow that'll make people wonder if you've been vacationing during colder months, but you don't have to share your inexpensive secret if you don't want to.

Amazon

Covergirl Trublend So Flushed Blush

You need a blush that's going to work with your makeup and not against it. Instead of spending a fortune on something you're not sure will work, give Covergirl's Trublend product a spin. You'll get amazing pigment that lasts throughout the day and won't irritate your skin.

Browse our Amazon Storefront for more fun beauty buys!

Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

It’s no secret that I’m a long-standing Trader Joe’s fan. Living walking-distance from my city’s most popular TJ’s store has only solidified my love for the quirky grocery chain, and though I adore their limited-time launches and playful seasonal snacks, there are a few Trader Joe's finds I can confidently crown as staples in my kitchen. These are the go-to’s I look forward to adding to my cart during every single TJ’s grocery run I make, all of which I’d truly feel lost without!

Meredith Holser

Trader Joe's 100% Colombian Instant Coffee

Don’t judge – even this coffee snob drinks instant coffee! I am all about ease when it comes to my morning routine (it truly takes me hours to actually wake up), and Trader Joe’s 100% Colombian Instant Coffee is just the thing to help me expedite getting some good ol' caffeine into my system.

I love using instant coffee because I can prepare it differently based on my mood every single day. I can make a latte by mixing a serving with milk and syrup, or add more water to it to prep a more diluted hot (or iced) coffee that’s not as strong. After months of drinking it, I’ve found that TJ’s instant coffee is just as good-tasting and well-rounded as the espresso drinks or coffees I’d order out at any cafe.

Meredith Holser

Trader Joe's Pure Grade A Maple Syrup

I use this Trader Joe’s maple syrup for a multitude of kitchen creations: coffees, protein smoothies, pancakes, mug cakes, and muffins are the most frequent syrup-infused recipes I eat on a weekly basis. You can even use it for some stellar maple cocktails!

I’m not necessarily picky when it comes to the grade of my maple syrup. As long as it’s sweet, I am into it. If you’re searching for a tasty and affordable Grade A maple syrup, I think this $5 bottle has an exceptional flavor with a nice touch of richness that makes it a perfect fit for most uses.

Meredith Holser

Trader Joe's Unsweetened Non-Dairy Almond Beverage

Another versatile TJ’s product I pick up just about every time I go grocery shopping is their almond milk. I prefer using the unsweetened iteration so I can use it across various recipes. I’ll use it for my morning coffees, mid-day smoothies, cereal bowls, baking adventures, overnight oats, and wherever else it’s needed, really! I’ll even add a tiny splash to my scrambled eggs to keep ‘em moist. It’s perfectly smooth and light, and a true delight to always have in my fridge.

Meredith Holser

Trader Joe's Coconut Cream Greek Nonfat Yogurt

I am a Greek yogurt girly through and through. It makes for a healthy, filling, protein-rich breakfast option that also helps me maintain a semblance of “gut health” amidst my afternoon snacking habits. But plain Greek yogurt is not nearly edible enough for my palate – that’s why I adore TJ’s coconut-flavored yogurt! It has a good amount of sweetness, plus it boasts a tiny bit of texture from coconut flakes. I typically pick up 2-3 cups on my grocery runs so I can enjoy it every other day during the week with granola and frozen berries.

Meredith Holser

Trader Joe's Buttermilk Protein Pancake Mix

I like to prioritize protein in my diet because it keeps me feeling fuller for longer and helps me grow my muscles so I can grow in my yoga and climbing practices. When eating eggs and sausage for breakfast gets all too tiring, TJ’s Buttermilk Protein Pancake mix provides an ideal sweet option that still gives me 10+ grams of protein in a single sitting! It’s super easy to prepare, too. You just have to add a 1:1 ratio of pancake mix to water and make ‘em on the stovetop per usual. I like adding in some cinnamon to up the flavor.

I’ll also use it to make a mug cake when I feel like I need a little sweet treat in the evening – I add it to a mug with just enough water to make the batter extra thick, and then sprinkle some chocolate chips in it before throwing it in the microwave for about 2 minutes. It’s so yummy!

Meredith Holser

Trader Joe's Buffalo Chicken Dip

Oh, I could eat this entire dip in a single sitting. Buffalo anything is truly the key to my heart (and stomach). TJ’s Buffalo Chicken Dip is my go-to workday snack alongside some blue corn tortilla chips. It’s super satisfying (another great protein-rich option), creamy, tangy, spicy, and salty. All the things!

It’s packed with bits of chicken that can also make it a great addition for fuller meals beyond snack time: I’ve slathered some on a tortilla with cheese and cilantro for an easy quesadilla-type wrap, and even added a heaping scoop to plain pasta in lieu of traditional sauce.

Meredith Holser

Trader Joe's Palak Paneer

If you ride or die for Trader Joe’s, you know just how amazing their frozen section is. I was honestly really skeptical to try this frozen Indian dish the first time around, but once I had a taste, I was hooked. I make sure I have at least one in my freezer at all times to come to the rescue on nights I simply can’t bring myself to cook!

It takes about 4 minutes in the microwave to become a super creamy, comforting, healthy meal you can enjoy on its own or alongside some rice and naan (if you wish to go the extra mile). The paneer cooks out wonderfully. I am a chronic over-seasoner for any kind of food I eat, and I've found that adding a pinch of salt and a drizzle of TJ’s hot honey really takes this platter to the next level.

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Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

My son randomly requested to watch Wednesday last month, and I was surprised at how invested we were in each episode. Those who grew up watching The Addams Family always seemed in awe of little Wednesday Addams' cunning and intuitive nature, so it's fun to see another generation fall in love with her. Since Halloween is next week, I have three last-minute DIY costumes if you want to dress up as the eldestAddams daughter — sans all the spooky things that took place at Nevermore Academy. 😉

1. Wednesday's Homecoming Dress

Netflix

Wednesday Addams caught everyone's eyes in this gorgeous black Tulle dress. I can't get it out of my mind, so that's why it's number one of my list of DIY Halloween ideas! I also think it's the easiest look to pull off because you don't need a lot of things!

Amazon

Black Wednesday Addams Dress

Wednesday never cared to follow the rules at Nevermore which is what made her unintentionally stand out. While the rest of the students were dressed in winter whites and pastel colors, Wednesday broke tradition by showing up in a tulle black dress that fit her personality. It's the very thing that made Xavier Thorpe do a double take even though he was supposed to be focused on Bianca Barclay.

Amazon

Black Closed-Toe Pumps

Complete your look with these black closed-toe pumps that fit Wednesday's personality! I suggest buying a pair of black tights in case you truly want to complete your look.

Amazon

Wet n Wild Breakup Proof Eyeliner

You're going to want to create the illusion of cat eyes with Wet n Wild's Breakup Proof Eyeliner. It's long-lasting and vegan so you'll get to wear something that doesn't harm your eyes.

2. Wednesday Addams' Nevermore Academy Uniform 

Amazon

Nevermore Academy Uniform

It's not 100% spot-on, but this is the closest you'll get to Wednesday's signature Nevermore Academy Uniform. Her take on the traditional wear was unlike what everyone at the school was used to seeing, but that was the point!

Amazon

Black Braided Wig

You'll definitely need Wednesday's signature braided hairstyle for this costume idea! It's one of those things that makes her look unassuming — even though we know she has that adorably dark, sadistic personality! 😉

Amazon

Thing Cosplay Hand

Make sure to carry your own version of Thing if you really want to give people a fright this halloween!

3. Traditional Wednesday Addams Costume

Hulton Archive

If you remember watching 1964 version ofThe Addams Family with your grandparents, you may be fond of Wednesday's more traditional look. Although newer versions haven't strayed far, true fans remember when her outfit was plain black button-up dress.

Amazon

Black Cosplay Dress

Skip the buttons and go for this black cosplay dress that comes with a pair of knee high socks, a Thing pin for your hair, 'poison' stickers, and a witchy necklace!

Amazon

Black Penny Loafers

Once you've slipped into your black dress and added your accessories, step into these penny loafers. They have a slightly chunky lug sole that'll make sure you're comfortable as you stalk your unsuspecting neighbors for the best candy.

If you need more last-minute ideas, we have so many fun DIY Halloween costumes, like Harley Quinn, Gilmore Girls, and couples costumes you can piece together in the next week!

Follow us on Pinterest for even more Halloween ideas!