It's pretty obvious you shouldn't wear white to a wedding, but why you should avoid shades of eggshell, pearl, and even beige goes beyond just matching the bride. "It is fundamentally about respecting the bride's unique role and ensuring she remains the center of attention on her special day," says Shafonne Myers, Owner and Editor-in-Chief at Pretty Pear Bride.
"Let the bride have her moment!" Grace Lee, Founder & CEO of Birdy Grey, agrees. "Even if your intentions are pure, showing up in white gives off the energy of trying to upstage the bride and can make things awkward for you. Best to stay away from white, ivory, or cream in my opinion."
Why does white at a wedding matter so much?
Wearing white at a wedding isn't just about the aesthetic of it all. "The tradition of the bride wearing white is deeply ingrained and carries significant cultural and symbolic weight," Myers says.
Queen Victoria wore white to marry Prince Albert on February 10, 1840 when it was more customary to wear the red velvet robe of state, and since then, white wedding dresses have come to symbolize virtue and purity. We've come a long way since 1840, and while modern couples can consider the details of this bridal tradition outdated, Myers says "the practice of reserving white for the bride will probably persist as a sign of respect and tradition."
While some people continue to put their own spin on wedding culture — dancing down the aisle à la The Office, wearing a black gown, or wearing pants — for some, this is a tradition they look forward to, historical meaning aside. I've personally been daydreaming about wearing a beautiful white wedding dress my whole life — there are so few occasions for a sophisticated white gown that I'll definitely be wearing one down the aisle!
How to wear white to a wedding without offending the bride?
In short, there isn't a way to respectfully wear white to a wedding unless the couple directly says it's okay. "As a guest, wearing white will remain a faux pas...unless the couple explicitly says otherwise," Lee says, listing an all-white wedding as an exception to the rule. Another exception could be for the bridal party. "I'm seeing a lot of brides opt for all-white or champagne bridal parties, which can look incredibly chic in wedding photos."
"Some brides opt for their guests or bridal party to wear white to create a cohesive aesthetic, with the bride herself standing out through different colors or accessories," Myers says.
Should I follow a wedding color palette?
Another new wedding trend that's become popular in recent years is for the bride to suggest a color palette for guests to follow if they wish. It can help create even more of a cohesive aesthetic for the wedding while still leaving room for individuality since a color palette can have three to five shades. (Just make sure you're referring to the guest color palette and not the wedding party color palette!)
"If the bride explicitly states that wearing white is acceptable, whether for mothers of the bride, mothers-in-law, or any guests, then it can be done," Myers says. "This is particularly seen in some contemporary wedding themes where the bride desires a uniform or specific color palette."
You don't necessarily have to follow the palette, but you should try to wear an outfit that matches the vibe. Some of my favorite wedding color palettes have been pastels, jewel tones, and a mix of pink and purple tones!
Is it okay to wear white floral print to a wedding?
Myers says that it's better to avoid lighter neutrals like gray, beige, and even floral white shades because of how close they look to pure white — especially in photographs. "If there is any doubt, it’s best to avoid these shades altogether," she says. "The general rule of thumb is that if a non-fashion-conscious individual perceives it as white, it is too close to white."
The one time it might be okay to wear a white floral pattern is if it features plenty of color, in which case Lee emphasizes to make sure there's "ZERO chance that someone can mistake you for the bride."
What color should guests wear to a wedding?
The good news is that there are so many wedding guest dress or suit trends, colors, and styles that there's a wedding guest outfit for literally everyone. "Bright, bold colors, pastels, jewel tones, and even black are generally acceptable, provided they align with the couple’s vision and the formality of the event," Myers says. "The key is to respect any specific dress codes or themes outlined by the couple, ensuring that your attire complements the overall aesthetic of the wedding."
Sara Margulis, CEO and Co-founder of Honeyfund, adds that dress codes are a great option for couples because "they're expressive, fun, and can ease those guest dress code worries."
"All of these changes — from personalized themed dress codes for guests to [Honeyfund's] personalized honeymoon registries — align directly with rising contemporary values of meaningful consumption and life-enhancing experiences," she adds.
"Overall I'd say the safest, drama-free options are always black, navy, olive or other neutral shades," Lee says. "I think it's really nice to see color at weddings, such as bright pink or blues. This season, I am OBSESSED with yellow."
There are plenty of wedding guest color options, whether you're into butter yellow, chartreuse, or navy blue. Wear whatever you feel most comfortable in — and what will make the bride shine. Grab a pair of these Cute And Comfy Wedding Guest Shoes to match!
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