13 Successful Women Share Tips on Breaking Through the Glass Ceiling

Alli Hoff Kosik
Mar 08, 2018

Most of us have grown up with the understanding that entering the workforce as a woman comes with its own set of challenges — lingering sexism, power imbalances, and a gender pay gap are just a few that come to mind. In traditionally male-dominated industries like tech, real estate, architecture, finance, and venture capital, things can be especially tricky.

We reached out to a handful of highly successful career women working in these fields to get their take on how to be a powerhouse on the job. There’s no doubt these insights will inspire you in your rise to the top — whether you’re the only woman at the office or part of a killer female-only team. Keep scrolling for their advice.

1. Tune in to culture. “When you are interviewing for a new job, pay close attention to the company’s culture. It can vary greatly, even within a given industry. I’m exceptionally lucky to work… in a special place where we not only allow for many different kinds of leaders to lead, but where we actually reward people for fostering a culture of vulnerability, collaboration, growth, and evolution, so we can all achieve our highest potential. This has been a critical component to my professional success and day-to-day happiness at work.” — Annie Gottbehuet, managing director, individual advisory services at TIAA

2. Support other women. “Without question, I would not be where I am today without the support and encouragement of other women in the workplace. It was absolutely critical to my career trajectory, as well as my overall growth and empowerment. Together, we are rewriting the rules of what it means to lead in the workplace — but there is still much to be done. We need more representation of women on executive boards, which is proven to benefit business, as well as a larger share of women in tech jobs and in C-suite roles. It is absolutely crucial that we continue to encourage and mentor one another to take on more leadership roles, seek out promotions, and help establish a healthier work-life balance.” — Christa Quarles, CEO of OpenTable

3. Look for the yes. “There was a time when I had to make multiple attempts and approach three different teams just to coordinate one deal. If I listened every time someone told me ‘no,’ I would always be stuck doing the same thing. I truly believe there is always a creative solution to every problem. Stay true to yourself and always keep a positive mindset. Most importantly, pay it forward!” — Natalie Cheung, general manager of drone light shows at Intel

4. Stay confident… and humble. “I have learned to find confidence in myself and my work. As the only woman, you can help bring a different perspective to the table that is often needed. At the same time, I believe that every day should be treated as an opportunity to learn and gain new insights. Therefore, you need to balance confidence with the ability to trust, respect, and collaborate with your coworkers.” — Linda Jiang, head of industrial design at Essential

5. Believe in something bigger. “Being in a male-dominated industry for over 30 years, I have learned that the most important lesson is to never lose sight of who you are, and always, always, always be true to yourself. Maintain your faith in something more — whether it’s your faith in God, your core beliefs, your spirit, or your moral center. Once you achieve this mindset, you’ll value your knowledge and hard work and, through that, anything is possible.” — Maile Aguila, senior vice president of residential sales at Swire Properties

6. Focus on the opportunity, rather than the challenges, of being a trailblazer. “When I began at The Glimpse Group, I was excited to be the only woman working at that tech startup, because it meant that I was responsible for setting the expectation for other women to eventually follow. Since my first day, the company has on-boarded some really incredible women with strong work ethics and bright minds. I am proud that my performance influenced the hire of these women… I know so many women that were beaten down by their jobs and various industries their careers were in, but this new industry is a completely blank slate with little prejudice or preconceived assumptions.” — Katelyn Coghlan, General Manager of In-It VR, a subsidiary of The Glimpse Group

7. Find your tribe. “Advocating for yourself is a lot easier when you are surrounded by people who support you. Find your allies and find your team. When you’re choosing a new job, don’t just pick the hottest company of the moment. Pick a place that fosters an environment where you can thrive. There are walls everywhere, but often, there are also great people — especially women — who are working hard to break down those walls brick by brick. That’s how we create real change, in all fields and careers.” — Emily Chang, author of BROTOPIA: Breaking Up the Boys’ Club of Silicon Valley($28)

8. Know your worth. “Being women in a field filled with men has helped us learn about self-worth. [As women], we have so much insecurity and anxiety when it comes to our ‘price tag,’ whether it be salary or the cost of the products or services your business provides. Instead of giving yourself the pressure to demand a high price straightaway, take time to test incremental increases with various clients or by project. Know your self-worth and create a case around it. That value will change over time, so make sure you are continually checking in with yourself.” — Jane Lee and Eva Chan, founders of Launch Pop

9. Use your intuition. “A lot of women are told not to bring emotion into business. I say to stay in tune with your emotions, and don’t be afraid to let them help guide you in the workplace. They have paved my career! Women in business carry an incredible amount of innate intuition and emotional intelligence that I don’t believe my male counterparts tap into enough. This important quality has guided me to grow my brokerage firm from 40 agents to more than 800 over the past 10 years.” — Mayi de la Vega, founder and CEO of ONE Sotheby’s International Realty

10. Use your differentiating qualities to your advantage. “Do not try to downplay any of your femininity or any aspects of your emotional being that make you who you are. Instead, use it to your advantage. Realize that in a male-dominated industry, the very essence of a woman at the table is a differentiating point and will be viewed as such. The ability to differentiate or diversify is often used as leverage in business.” — Natalie Diaz, chief of staff at Time Equities

11. Be you. “I am so proud of women. We are working our butts off with such dignity and collaboration. No longer are we undercutting our sisters in the office or downplaying our skills to be subservient to men. We are standing together, expressing our opinions, and moving mountains. My advice? Be proud of your womanhood, build relationships that count, seek community, and emotionally tune in. Yes — tune in to your emotions! Your passions and perseverance will skyrocket you to the top. Anyone pushing you down… let them go.” — Nicole Liebman, director at Hudson Realty Group

12. Don’t overthink it. “Working in a male-dominated industry, I quickly realized that I needed to rise above it, meaning I don’t dwell on the fact that I am in the minority. Kick ass and you will rise above it. Don’t focus on the people who want to pull you down. Find someone else to work with, work somewhere else, or tell yourself they don’t matter, and you will quickly realize that there is no gender when you reach the top of your game.” — Jessica Worman, co-president of M2G Ventures

13. Be fearless. “Architecture has been called the ‘most masculine of arts,’ and yet, when you lift the veil, you find both men and women hard at it. The profession is not for the faint of heart, and it requires great teams and intense collaboration. I grew up during the feminist movement when there was a new freedom to challenge traditional roles. I never had any doubt that women could achieve great things. I was fearless and vocal and unwilling to let gender stand in the way of achieving my potential. Constantly and consciously find meaning in every challenge and build strength through every experience to fuel your creativity, ideas, and strategy.” — Marianne McKenna, founding partner of KPMB Architects 

What’s the best career advice you’ve ever gotten? Tweet us @BritandCo!

(Photo via Getty)

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10 Easy Ways To Avoid Burnout At Work, According To A Career Coach

Landing your dream job after crying over bowls of ice cream and a few cocktails feels like hitting the fulfillment lottery. Suddenly, those many nights spent wondering if your career goals would ever materialize seem like a thing of the past. I sympathize with you because I've been there and know what how it feels to wonder if your dreams will ever come true.

I'm also the first to let you know it's possible to give too much to your dream job because you're excited and think, "Doing what I love will never feel like work." Easy misconception aside, you'll hit a home run that leads right into a burnout hole.

How do you avoid getting burnt out from your dream job? Just refer to life and career coach Sally Anne Carroll, PCC of Whole Life Strategies!

What makes landing a dream job so exciting?

Alexander Suhorucov/Pexels

The moment you go from thinking about your dream job to actually landing it feels euphoric. You feel a mixture of "I FINALLY did it" and "I can't wait to get started" because you've wanted it for so long. Carroll offers a better explanation though.

"A dream job is often one that marries our strengths, values, and interests — so it feels meaningful and purposeful as well as presenting opportunities to grow and develop in ways that feel exciting," she says.

This doesn't mean all dream jobs are created equal. Carroll says, "Everyone’s definition of a dream job is a little different, but the idea of showing up every day to do work that feels personally impactful, challenging and fulfilling is really motivating for many of us."

What are some harmful ways people approach daily tasks within their dream role?

ThisIsEngineering/Pexels

I'm ambitious which isn't bad, but I've been known to be so laser-focused that I forget to take care of my basic needs. It's my way of trying to convince myself that I have to accomplish 2-3 things on my to-do list before giving something else my attention.

"It’s natural to want to succeed in a dream role, but there can be a number of pitfalls to watch out for as you try to prove yourself in the role and work at a demanding pace. It’s just as important to manage your energy and your workload as it is to manage your time," Carroll reminds.

Here's some of the harmful things she says you can do without realizing:

  • Piling too much on your plate each day without a coherent plan to focus and prioritize on priorities
  • Always saying yes to additional workload or meetings without assessing your other commitments
  • Working too many hours, especially without breaks or adequate downtime to recharge, or feeling a need to be “on” 24-7
  • Placing your work to-do list ahead of your self care, sleep or other needs
  • Not communicating clearly about expectations, demands, feedback and needs with managers and co-workers

How can people recognize when they're overexerting themselves at work?

RDNE Stock project/Pexels

I'm beginning to think a lot of us are more introspective than we let on, but we may need help figuring out how to redirect ourselves. Carroll says, "Most clients I have worked with know on some level that they’re overdoing it. They feel the stress, and they may know that they need help in coping with it in healthier ways. But they often haven’t figured out how to unwind the situation that’s been created."

She suggests practicing self-reflection, priority and boundary setting, and often, self compassion and grace for yourself. I probably sound like a broken record, but I wholeheartedly believe we could be kinder to ourselves. Sometimes we place so much expectations on ourselves based on what society, family, or even our friends think.

Artem Podrez/Pexels

Carroll says, "Burnout isn’t always a situation of overexertion, however. Sometimes it’s a mismatch between the role and our values, ethics or needs, or toxic workplace situations that can feed burnout as well. And in those cases, you might not recognize it at first."

Unfortunately, toxic workplaces are far more common than any of us like and can add to the stress we place on ourselves to perform our duties well. This can cause us to lose sight of what's truly important to us at our core. Carroll says, "It’s important to identify your core stressors so that you can address those. Burnout is not always about being busy."

What are signs someone is experience burnout?

Mizuno K/Pexels

Knowing that doesn't mean you're still able to understand if you're experiencing burnout or not though. "Burnout can look many ways — you might find yourself feeling stressed more often or less able to deal with your stressors," Carroll says. "There may be tiredness leading to exhaustion, brain fog, not thinking clearly, or a feeling of running on fumes."

That's always my first sign that I'm feeling burned out. I prioritize sleep because it helps me function the way I'm supposed to, but being sleepy is different from feeling tired on a soul level. There have been times where my alarm has gone off in the morning before work and it feels like I have to drag myself out of bed.

Another indicator that could be experiencing burnout is by losing enthusiasm at your dream job. "You might also be losing interest in the work, feeling like you can’t keep up or that the effort is futile. Often I hear 'I just don’t feel like myself. I’m not usually like this,'" Carroll says.

What happens when burnout completely overwhelms someone even if they love their job?

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This is the part that makes working at your dream job so difficult IMO. I've talked to people who love what they do, but can't find the motivation to keep performing at the high level everyone expects them to.

"Being in full burnout is a physical and mental crisis point. You may feel depressed, lost, numb, exhausted. Your physical and mental health suffers, as well as your joy and often this has an impact on your wider relationships," Carroll indicates.

There's nothing worse than snapping at the people you love because you're stressed and don't know how to communicate that it's because of your dream job. It can take a lot to admit things are tough because you may not want to feel like you're complaining about something you've always wanted.

How can someone have a healthy relationship with work while prioritizing their mental health?

Pavel Danilyuk/Pexels

Burnout is real, it doesn't have to be a permanent thing. One of The Sims 4 characters I was playing developed the 'workaholic' trait and it got to the point where even she came home with the burnout moodlet.

She only had 24 hours to change it before it started affecting the quality of her work so I had to find ways to help her relax. The only thing that truly helped was taking PTO and allowing her to unwind at a spa, spend time with her loved ones, and indulge in hobbies that had nothing to do with work. Eventually, I helped her get rid of the workaholic trait because it was causing more harm than good.

Though that's a simulation game, I can imagine this happens to people. We have to decide we're willing to change how we approach our dream jobs so we're able to still function in our daily lives.

olia danilevich/Pexels

Carroll says, "Setting and maintaining healthy boundaries — with ourselves and with others — is a key point. Even when it’s your dream job, even when it’s demanding, your work is still one part of the larger picture of your life. Start with what is firmly in your control and make changes there first — there may be workplace changes to consider, but that comes second."

She says this can look like:

  • Placing limits on working after hours
  • Setting technology boundaries
  • Being transparent about workload and priorities
  • Learning to say no
  • Reorganizing or blocking out parts of your schedule and potentially initiating new conversations with your leaders and colleagues where needed

What emotions might someone feel if they realize their dream job isn't what they expected?

Christina Morillo/Pexels

It's disappointing when certain things we thought we wanted aren't what we need or even like. It doesn't matter whether we're learning how to get over a crush or feel like our dream job has become a nightmare.

"When our dream job turns out to be less a dream than expected, it’s natural to feel disappointed, sad, disillusioned or even grief. Depending on the situation, there may be resentment and anger as well if the job was misrepresented, or self doubt and questioning yourself and your decisions," Carroll says.

It doesn't always feel good, but letting yourself feel whatever emotion or thought comes up will help you get through the breakdown of having a dream job that's not what you expected it to be. Carroll says, "It’s important that you allow yourself time and space to understand what you’re feeling and to process that before deciding what to do next. There may be ways to job craft a more fulfilling experience, or you might decide to look at alternatives."

How can someone pivot towards something different if they want to leave their dream job?

Andrea Piacquadio/Pexels

Thinking about stepping away from your dream job in favor of telling burnout to take a hike? This is a judgement-free zone so just know you're able to do that if it makes sense to pivot in a different direction. However, Carroll does advise you to be mindful before making a potentially life-changing decision.

"The first step I always advise clients who want to step away from their role — dream job or not — is to assess the situation from a bigger picture before acting," she says.

  • Take the time to understand what you’ve appreciated most about the role, what you didn’t and what you’re complete with/longing for at this stage of your career. Take stock of what’s most important to you and what is fueling your desire for change.
  • Assess your strengths, skillsets, interests, and career values. A career coach can be a valuable ally to understand how you might you lean into these more as you decide where to pivot.
  • Activate your future by exploring new career roles that build on the foundation you have, but stretch you in the ways you desire and meet your larger life goals. Then do your homework. Go out and explore potential roles through research, networking, job shadowing and interviewing. Testing out your ideas helps you move forward with clarity and confidence before investing in a job search or retraining.

Your dream job doesn't have to end in detriment, but it's still important to know that burnout can happen no matter how much you love what you do. You're not incapable of doing your job just because you get tired and aren't able to do the job of 5 people every single day.

What matters is how well you're able to take care of yourself so you can show up in different areas of your life. And if you still want to give that dream job a chance or step away after you've taken time to catch your breath? That's okay.

Looking for more career advice? Be sure to follow us on Facebook so you never miss a thing!

Header image via olia danilevich/Pexels

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A Powerful New Moon Is Coming — Here's What It Means For Your Weekly Horoscope!

We're officially one week into Scorpio season — are you feeling it? Is your intuition heightened? Are you super sensitive and a bit more introverted? It’s a good time to slow down, feel your feelings, and tap into the inner wisdom of your soul. Scorpio is often misinterpreted, perhaps because this season coincides with Halloween, the decreasing daylight in the northern hemisphere, or simply Scorpio’s intensity and power. A key word for Scorpio is transformation, which is never easy.

Think of the caterpillar’s metamorphosis — its time in the cramped and dark cocoon. That primordial, gooey existence is anything but comfortable. Transformation requires time, a willingness to experience discomfort, and patience before emerging as a beautiful butterfly.

Ajaila Walker

Scorpio is one of the healing signs in the zodiac, and while the Sun is in Scorpio, we can make great strides toward healing ourselves and helping others. There’s nothing superficial about Scorpio — it demands depth, wanting to uncover layers and expose what’s hiding. That’s why it’s a great time to focus on your inner world and subconscious mind. All forms of therapy are beneficial during Scorpio season, but psychotherapy is especially powerful if that's an option for you.

Eager to know what this transformational energy has to offer? Read on for your weekly horoscope to understand how this can impact your sun and rising sign!

​Astrological Overview For Your Weekly Horoscope

Eugene Lisyuk

The New Moon in Scorpio occurs on November 1 at 9 degrees of Scorpio. You'll want to check your birth chart to see where 9 degrees of Scorpio falls — this is the area of your life where you can experience transformation and growth. New Moons are powerful times to plant seeds for future growth, to dream and plan for the coming month. Take time to reflect on what truly matters during this period of darkness and inward focus.

Yuliia Tretynychenko

Mars, the planet of action and determination, has been opposite Pluto, the planet of transformation, for months. Both Mars and Pluto co-rule Scorpio, creating an intense and volatile energy. This opposition becomes exact again on November 3 and 4. Use this energy to propel yourself in a new direction and honor your true self. Strength and focus can harness this intensity for personal breakthroughs, but be cautious in making impulsive decisions during this time — on the global stage, tensions may rise, and there could be heightened aggression.

Sam Lion

Adding to this turbulent energy, Mercury, the planet of communication and learning, leaves Scorpio and enters Sagittarius on November 2. As Mercury exits Scorpio, it forms a beneficial trine to Mars and a sextile to Pluto. This is a powerful opportunity for words to contribute to healing, so take care in how you communicate. Be mindful of the power your words hold, especially as Sagittarius can be blunt and outspoken. While Mercury is in Sagittarius until January 9, focus on expanding your consciousness, learning new skills, and broadening your horizons.

Key Dates For Your Weekly Horoscope

Ashley Singerling

  • November 1 — New Moon in Scorpio
  • November 2 — Mercury enters Sagittarius
  • November 3-4 — Mars and Pluto opposition becomes exact

Read Your Horoscope Based on Your Sun and Rising Signs

Brit + Co

Aries (March 21 – April 20)

You’re being asked to dig deep into your subconscious this week. Keep your eyes and ears open for messages from dreams or moments of creativity. Meditation or solitude may reveal powerful realizations. If you feel the need to make a major life change, be sure your decisions come from the heart. You’re on the cusp of a creative breakthrough, but make sure your actions are driven by authenticity.

Brit + Co

Taurus (April 22 – May 21)

Relationships are in focus for you. This is a great week for couples therapy or deep, transformative conversations with your partner. Be willing to make changes that benefit your relationships, home, and career. Your sensitivity may be heightened, so incorporate self-care and self-love into any changes you make. Don’t shy away from this potential for growth — there’s tremendous opportunity for profound shifts.

Brit + Co

Gemini (May 22 – June 21)

Good fortune and harmony are possible, but luck won’t just fall into your lap — you need to be proactive. This could show up in your relationships with others or in your relationship with yourself. Kindness, equality, and fairness are key to success. Be cautious around people exhibiting aggressive behavior. You’ll receive back what you give out, so practice kindness and ensure you’re approaching things with fairness and balance.

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Cancer (June 22 – July 22)

You prefer to avoid conflict, but this week you’ll have the chance to step out of your comfort zone. You don’t have to be confrontational, but a bit of assertiveness will help you move toward your goals. The seeds you plant during this New Moon will grow stronger if you add passion and creativity. Follow your intuition, especially when making important decisions. Your dreams need a touch of energy and action.

Brit + Co

Leo (July 23 – August 22)

The Mars-Pluto opposition has likely stirred up some drama in your life. Have you mustered the courage to start something new? If not, this week offers an opportunity to fully step into your authentic self and begin a new chapter. Don’t hold back, but be prepared for uncharted territory. Your relationships, particularly with yourself, may need a refresh. Self-love and self-care are essential as you embark on these transformations. You might even consider sprucing up your home or making a move.

Brit + Co

Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Career growth is in focus this week, but you’ll need to find a balance between your home life and work life. You may feel the urge to do more in both areas, but it’s crucial to stay grounded. Pay attention to details and avoid overindulgence. A balance between home and work will lead to the best results — be sure to tend to both areas without letting one consume the other.

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Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Your finances and values are the focus this week. Now is the perfect time to ensure your financial life is in order. Meet with a financial planner or make sure your will is up to date. This planning will give you peace of mind and reduce future stress. Once Mercury moves into Sagittarius on November 2, you’ll feel freer to have fun and pursue adventure, knowing that your financial security is taken care of.

Brit + Co

Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

Your power and determination will only grow as the week progresses. Use this time to tap into your inner authority and work toward concrete goals. There’s likely to be movement in your career, but it won’t happen overnight. Patience and sustained effort are required. Cultivate joy and focus on long-term goals — there’s no rush, but steady progress will lead to great results.

Brit + Co

Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Mercury entering your sign on November 2 invites expansion and learning. If you’ve been waiting to start a new project, learn a new skill, or expand your understanding of the universe, now is the time. Subjects like spirituality and philosophy will be easier to grasp during this time. Be mindful, though — your blunt communication style could come off as caustic, so take a breath before you speak.

Brit + Co

Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Mental well-being should be a priority. Use this time to focus on learning and honing your skills. Your approach to life and work is inspiring to others. If you’ve been dealing with self-doubt, discard any negative self-talk and practice self-compassion. You have a natural ability to teach others, so don’t hesitate to share your knowledge with those who might be facing something similar to your experiences.

Brit + Co

Aquarius (January 20 – February 19)

This week focuses on your community and your relationship with like-minded people. Group learning and activities will be more impactful than solo efforts. Mercury in Sagittarius from November 2 will encourage you to learn through travel and adventure. Something exciting and transformative is on the horizon — seize the opportunity for growth through connection with others.

Brit + Co

Pisces (February 20 – March 21)

It’s time to focus on your physical health. The energy of this week will make it easier to start a health regimen and stick to it. While you may become more serious about your health, don’t push yourself too hard. Take small, steady steps to make lasting changes. As the week progresses, you’ll feel more confident and enthusiastic about these positive changes to your well-being.

Looking for a more thorough reading? Reach out to Tina at SevenSistersAstrology.com!

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6 Incredible Pieces Of Career Advice From Carrie Bradshaw That Every Recent Grad Should Read

Over the past few decades, Carrie Bradshaw became famous for her sense of style and her illustrious dating life, but her career? Not so much. Carrie's career never got the love and recognition it deserved, despite the fact that when most Gen X and millennial women think of New York writers, an image of Carrie at her laptop comes to mind.

Gone are the days where college grads would get their first job, rise the corporate ranks, and stay for half a decade (or more) — only to pivot to an adjacent company and continue their safe, yet predictable career paths. For better or worse, the job market has changed, and the trajectory of our collective careers have changed along with it.

As a fellow blonde New Yorker with an unconventional career path, I've always admired Carrie's professional pursuits. Watching (and rewatching) Sex and the City gives me so many sage pieces of advice that remain invaluable as I pave my own way, whether that was the writers' intention or not. Keep reading for the job and career advice from Carrie Bradshaw that every recent grad and corporate girly should read.

Careers are not linear, and that's OK!

Max

Rather than feeling like a failure for not living up to our parents’ outdated idea of success, I’ve taken some wisdom from Carrie, who had this all figured out back in the '90s. She started as a columnist for a newspaper, then authored several successful books, before becoming a podcast host. In between, she also wrote for Vogue and headlined a speaker series on dating in New York City.

The moral of the story? It’s OK to change directions and to switch up your path if what you’ve been doing no longer brings you joy (or, if the industry shifts and you need to pay rent). You don’t need to cling to a decision just because you spent a long time making it.

You can make the freelance & gig economy work for you.

HBO

Carrie was a freelance writer before it was cool, but she was also an early adapter to the gig economy (see: all those Learning Annex lessons). Manhattan is expensive, and when I was laid off at the start of the pandemic, I turned to freelance work to make ends meet. I had to get really scrappy and learn some new skills on the fly, but like Carrie, it all worked out in the end (and I had some cash left over for shoes, too!)

Fake it 'til you make it!

Max

Sure, Carrie is a member of the press, but she’s a sex columnist at a D-list publication. No shade to a fellow writer, but I love how Carrie didn’t let this stand in her way. She attended fashion week and befriended Vogue editors and talked up her accomplishments enough to get into any door she wanted (except for that LA premiere, but we'll forgive it). One thing I’ve learned is that you’re your own best advocate, and no one else is going to do the work for you — it’s up to you to make things happen for yourself.

Know your worth, and don't settle for less.

HBO

When Carrie decided to buy her condo, but she didn't have enough cash saved (a different story for a different day), she proclaimed that she was offered "$4 a word at Vogue — most people get $2." Now, even in the '90s/early millennium this was seriously delulu, but Carrie believed in herself, went after what she wanted, and earned what she was worth. In-universe, this is double what the average Vogue writer was earning, which is a major win.

Don't let the fear of making a mistake stop you from thinking big and taking calculated risks!

HBO

When Carrie is approached to write a book based on her column, she's in shock and even considers turning down the opportunity. She decides to take a meeting, but it doesn't go well and she questions whether she should be writing a book at all. Luckily, Carrie pushes through these moments of self-doubt and completes her book, which becomes a huge success and the first of many. The lesson here is that self-doubt is normal, but letting those thoughts take over will hold you back from your full potential.

Remember to trust the process, because good things won't happen overnight!

Max

One of my favorite things about Carrie is that she's a flawed character and forever a work-in-progress, from her love life to her career path. When we first meet Carrie, she's writing a weekly column for a local newspaper. We see her writing the column every day (for six seasons!), which may seem insignificant, but she's laying the groundwork and putting in the hours for her next career move, whatever that may be. Little by little, we see Carrie start to take on bigger projects, and she ends the series as a Vogue writer, a best-selling author, and a highly respected figure in NYC society. TV and movies can present success as an overnight sensation, but in real life — and in Carrie's case — it's more often a marathon than a sprint. Remember to give yourself grace and trust the process.

Looking for more career advice? Sex and the City? Whatever you need, be sure to follow us Facebook!

Header image via HBO

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20 Home Decor Accounts To Follow Right Now For Major Fall Inspiration

I turn to Instagram for mainly two things: hilariously adorable pet videos to share with my daughter before bedtime — a nightly ritual we started a year back — and a steady stream of home decor inspiration. Having studied interior design and spent years writing about stunning spaces, my love for beautiful interiors runs deep. The home decor bloggers I follow offer a mix of styles and experiences, from cozy vintage vibes to refined and sophisticated homes and rooms. Whether you’re looking to refresh your space for the season or simply find joy in nesting at home, there’s a little something from everyone here to inspire you. Happy decorating!

PrettyOnFridays

PrettyOnFridays

Writer Deema Tabbara Lopez's Friday newsletter, Merci Ktir, offers a glimpse into all the pretty things bringing her joy each week. Her home is so cozy, filled with vintage charm and lovely DIYs and how-tos (and stunning paint colors!). You'll want to dive into her feed for all the inspiration this fall.

ThisHouse5000

ThisHouse5000

Home decor enthusiast Elena Lohse and her handyman husband have been renovating their 1935 home in Toronto’s west end, the Junction, for the past 4+ years. Her style is clean, fresh, and never boring. I love her DIY videos, and her blog follows their travels too through a unique design lens.

Erin Conway Kismet House

Kismet House

For a masters in warm, cozy traditional spaces, follow Erin and Matthew of Kismet House who share tips and tricks for creating homes that feel unique and full of character.

Michael P.H. Clifford

a1000xBetter

Designer Kirsten Blazek creates rooms that are authentic, stylish, and so comfortable. She really thinks about spaces you want to live in. I'm still swooning over this kitchen of hers that we featured. Her first book A1000xBetter: A Rebel By Designshowcases her eclectic interiors and love of vintage treasures along with her design inspirations and tips.

Banda Property

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NYC-based Christiane Lemieux is an author, designer, entrepreneur and the founder of LEMIEUX ET CIE, a luxury home furnishings brand. If you're looking for elevated interiors with a smidge of fantasy and the unexpected, her feed is the place to be. She was also the co-host and a judge on Ellen’s Design Challenge on HGTV and is a regular guest on MSNBC.

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Everything You Need To Know About The Silk Press, Fall's Biggest Hairstyle

From Kamala Harris-inspired bobs to silky Lindsay Lohan-esque tresses, the season of the silk press (or straighter hairstyles) is officially here! It's been fun watching watching TikTok videos of women going to the salon to get their hair straightened, but it made me ask myself if people truly know how to maintain this style at home. It's one thing to watch a licensed hairstylist work their magic, but the upkeep may not be as straightforward for some people!

Luckily, celebrity hairstylists, Takisha Sturdivant-Drew and Natalie Lamorena, are here to answer all my burning questions. Sturdivant-Drew has over 20 years of experience working in the film and commercial industry, styling clients such as Kerry Washington, Lucy Liu, and Ashley Graham. She also worked on TV series like Suits and the Oscar-nominated film Ray. Lamorena owns Polished Pub Hair & Nail Bar— not to mention she invented the viral "Headicure" service for clients who love the idea of getting a manicure while receiving the best blowout of their lives. And with all that experience, the two of them have plenty to say about silk presses.

TL;DR

  • You should rely on professionals for the majority of your silk presses, but you can maintain them at home with "the right tools and products."
  • Different hair types require different temperatures and products — be sure to research and check with your hair dresser to make sure your treating your hair the right way.
  • Don't get a silk press if you've recently straightened your hair.
  • Heat protectant is key for any silk press or hair straightening.
  • Naturally curly or textured hair should limit silk presses to once or twice a month; other hair types should keep it to no more than once a week.
  • Be sure to wrap your hair correctly and use a bonnet to maintain your style.

How do you know when to straighten your hair at home or go to the salon?

Sephora

Desperate times call for desperate measures when you're due for a hair appointment and can't book one. I'm sure all of us have turned into an armchair hairstylist by giving ourselves a trim, quick haircut, or dye job. You've probably even watched a few tutorials about how to give yourself a homemade silk press or blowout. I know I've recently purchased a few things to help me maintain my hair at home, but should we be straightening our hair at home?

Lamorena says, "While it’s possible to straighten hair at home, I’d recommend going to a professional for the best results. Stylists know how to work with different hair types, adjust heat settings accordingly, and use high-quality products that protect your hair." If we decide to forego a stylist's expertise, she says we can "accidentally cause damage with uneven heat or over-processing."

Sturdivant-Drew agrees that it's best to see a stylist "for the first few silk presses," but it's not impossible to safely straighten your own hair. "If you have the right tools and products, along with research, you can achieve this hairstyle at home," she says.

How should different hair types approach a silk press?

Sephora

Just like everyone doesn't have the same skin complexion or undertones, hair types can differ too. This means someone with a fine hair isn't always going to have the same routine as someone with thicker strands — which is why all silk presses aren't the same. "There's definitely no one-size-fits-all approach. The technique used depends on the client’s hair type and texture," Lamorena confirms. This isn't to scare you, however!

Sturdivant-Drew says, "The process of getting a silk press is pretty standard — prepping the hair with shampoo, conditioner, and heat protectant, followed by straightening with a blow dryer and flat iron, and finishing with a lightweight oil or serum."

She and Lamorena do agree that some hair textures require a little more than others though. Lamorena says you could only need "a simple blowout and flat iron" while someone may need "more intensive treatments like keratin or a Brazilian blowout for longer-lasting results." If your hair is very curly or textured — and you're ultimately not seeing the results you want — she says chemically straightening your hair is another option. However, Sturdivant-Drew reminds me, "Stylists usually adjust heat settings based on their client's hair health and texture."

Either way, we always recommend you check with your stylist before making any permanent or lasting decisions!

What should you avoid doing before getting a silk press?

Mike Jones

Getting a silk press doesn't always involve chemicals, but there are still things you need to avoid before your appointment. Unlike the steps you may follow at home, Lamorena wants you to "avoid loading your hair with a bunch of heavy products " because this can "make the straightening process less effective and lead to more heat being used" than you need. Also, she doesn't want you to wash your hair because "natural oils protect your hair from the heat."

It probably goes without saying, but you also shouldn't book a silk press appointment if you've already straightened your hair. "...that can make it harder for the stylist to work with and could increase the risk of damage," says Lamorena. Besides that, Sturdivant-Drew advises against "using color or relaxers should be avoided before getting a silk press" because "this could lead to a lot of breakage."

What increases a risk of heat damage with this style?

Amazon

As gorgeous as silk presses are, it's possible to use "too much heat," according to Lamorena. She says, "People tend to crank up the heat on their flat irons and blow dryers, but that can seriously damage the hair cuticle, especially if your hair is fine or already fragile." Something I've learned over time is that a licensed and experienced hair stylist has better knowledge of what's really going on with our hair. They're able to have a clearer view of your scalp, roots, split ends, and more.

The other thing that contribute to damage is not protecting your hair. Lamorena implores that heat protectant products are "are crucial for minimizing damage." Even if you use the right products, you could be straightening your hair way too often. It's normal to want to have straighter hairstyles for a little while, but you should keep in mind that you don't want to overdo it.

"Not prepping or using a heat protectant on your hair will cause a lot of damage. Silk presses require a lot of heat, so it's best to use good heat protectant," adds Sturdivant-Drew. She personally prefers to use Smooth Moisture's Thermal Hair Strengthener because "their system is built for silk presses specifically." She loves that it truly upholds against heat and "adds a nice shine to the hair" once you apply it.

When would it be recommended that a client avoid getting a silk press?

Kaboompics.com

Here comes the not so fun part. As much as you don't want to hear this, your hair may not be able to handle getting a silk press right now. "If your hair is already damaged, it's best to hold off on straightening. Hair that's brittle, dry, or over-processed can be further damaged by heat styling," says Lamorena. What you can do in the meantime is help strengthen your hair by giving yourself "deep conditioning treatments," according to Lamorena.

This is completely up to you and your stylish, but Lamorena suggests staying away from having your hair straightened "during really humid months...if you're prone to frizz" because "the style may not last as long."

Is there a limit to how often clients should receive a silk press?

Tomaz Barcellos

I'm not an expert, but even I know too much of something can become a bad thing. In the case of using excess heat, I can imagine the implications of that over time. Lamorena says, "There's definitely a limit. You don't want to be straightening your hair too often," and shares her rule of thumb for textures:

  • Naturally Curly or Textured Hair — Limit silk presses to once or twice a month to avoid weakening the hair or losing your curl pattern.
  • Other Hair Types — Keep it to no more than once a week.

All hair types are capable of experiencing "long-term damage," but giving "your hair a break between sessions helps maintain its health," Lamorena says.

Sturdivant-Drew stresses, "Taking a break between silk presses is important in allowing your hair to recover and maintain the health of your hair. I recommend limiting your silk presses to every 6-8 weeks."

How can clients maintain this style at home during the fall?

Sephora

Even though cooler temperatures means you won't have to fight against possible frizz, you still have to take care of your silk press. "Maintaining a straight style during the fall can be tricky with cooler weather, wind, and dryness in the air, but it’s doable," says Lamorena. She suggests that you use:

  • Use a flat iron with adjustable heat settings to avoid unnecessary damage. Tools like the Dyson Corrale or GHD Platinum+ are solid options
  • A wide-tooth comb is great for detangling without pulling or breaking the hair

"Keeping up with a regular routine and using the right tools and products can really help your style last, even through the challenges that fall weather brings," she says.

No matter what your hair type is, Sturdivant-Drew suggests "wrapping your hair correctly and using a bonnet" as they're "key to maintaining" a silk press. Similar to what Lamorena said earlier, Sturdivant-Drew believes "humidity is your worst enemy...so try to avoid humid environments as best as possible!"

Shop Other Expert Silk Press Recommendations

Amazon

Bumble and Bumble Invisible Oil Primer

"Always apply a heat protectant before using any hot tools. Some favorites include Oribe Royal Blowout and Bumble and Bumble Invisible Oil Primer," she says.

Amazon

Moroccanoil Treatment

"For taming frizz, try an anti-frizz serum like Moroccanoil Treatment," suggests Lamorena. or John Frieda Frizz Ease.

Amazon

John Frieda Frizz Ease

Another option you can use to beat the frizz is John Frieda's Frizz Ease. It's another one of Lamorena's recommendations that will "help seal in moisture and keep your style sleek even in windy fall weather."

Amazon

Kérastase Discipline Fluidissime

Lamorena says, "A good leave-in conditioner is key to keeping hair smooth and hydrated; Kérastase Discipline Fluidissime works wonders."

Amazon

Living Proof Perfect Hair Day

"To extend your style without washing, use dry shampoo. This is a great option to absorb oil without having to restyle with heat," she says.

Our Silk Press Recommendations

Amazon

Giovanni Frizz Be Gone Serum

This anti-frizz serum will not only keep humidity from messing up your silk press, but it'll help improve your hair's elasticity over time and will even add an extra boost of shine to it.

Amazon

Wavytalk Professional Hair Dryer with Diffuser

If you decide to straighten your hair at home, you need a good blow dryer that'll work with your texture. Wavytalk has an inexpensive option that comes with a comb attachment, diffuser, and nozzle to help you dry your hair no matter what style you're wearing. It also has the right amount of heat settings that'll lessen the chance you cause any damage.

Amazon

CHI 44 Iron Guard Heat Protectant

Not only do I personally love this heat protectant, so does our Affiliate Writer Meredith Holser! It's been our go-to product whenever we straighten our hair because it truly does a great job of protecting our hair from heat and has a slightly fragrant smell we can't get enough of. In my experience, a little goes a long way so you'll get plenty of uses out of it.

Follow our Amazon storefront to see which hair products we'll always keep in our bathrooms.

Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

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