10 Tips To Boost Your Confidence In Your 30s And Beyond

confidence tips

My confidence was at an all-time high in my late 20s. I had a great circle of friends, a busy social life, a long-term boyfriend, and a career that was looking up. But then I moved to NYC when I turned 30 and had to rebuild my core group. It was hard starting a new-ish life and my confidence took a hit.

I look back at that time and want to tell her to relax and focus on the positive — and there were A LOT of positives. But sometimes just one negative can make us see everything through a cloudier lens.

It wasn’t until my later 30s that I regained that confidence and started to see my life turn in a positive new direction: a publisher accepted my book proposal, I was traveling on an Eat, Pray, Love-style trip, and I was looking and feeling my best. After all, confidence is sexy, right? It also has a way of multiplying the good in life.

Here are some reminders of how to find your confidence, even when things seem to be falling apart.

Celebrate Your Strengths

Mwabonje Ringa

What do you love most about yourself, for real? How do you stand out from your peers? Celebrate all the things that make you YOU. Take time to celebrate your achievements, no matter how small, and be patient with the areas that might need improvement. Accepting yourself as you are is the first step to building genuine confidence.

Live Passionately

Antoni Shkraba

One of my favorite authors, Isabel Allende has a great Ted Talk about living passionately at any age. Be curious, say yes to worthy experiences, and seek out the things that bring you joy, such as a hobby or a cause you care about. Helping others can enhance your sense of purpose and confidence.

Count Yourself In

ThisIsEngineering

Sports exec Emily Jaenson talks about counting yourself in – when you're afraid to address a difficult situation, confront someone, or need to present at work with confidence. She likes to countdown before she goes "live," so pause, take a deep breath, and count 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 before you start anything hard. This can help calm your nerves and help you perform better.

Remind Yourself That Hard Times Do Pass

Laker

When I was going through a hard time, my friend sent me Pema Chödrön’s When Things Fall Apart. It sounds sort of ominous, but it’s the complete opposite. What I gained is that when things do seem to fall apart they always eventually rise, and I sort of find comfort in that now. This too shall pass, right? It’s about finding the happiness within all of us no matter how hard things are, and embracing failure or suffering — fearlessly, compassionately, and with curiosity.

Set Achievable Self Care Goals

Sam Lion

If one area of your life isn’t going well – say, relationships or career – focus on the things you can control. Prioritize self-care routines that make you feel nurtured and valued. Start a fitness routine or join a team sport to improve your physical health and boost your mood and energy levels, which contribute to overall confidence. Establish achievable goals, breaking down larger ones into smaller ones, based on your strengths and interests. Start with a vision board!

Overcome Negative Self Talk

Ketut Subiyanto

I love the Eleanor Roosevelt quote, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” (Yes, that's who Joe quoted in The Princess Diaries) Challenge and reframe your negative thoughts. Focus on your achievements and positive experiences, and replace the negative thoughts with affirmations and constructive self-talk. Be honest with yourself and remind yourself of all the good you've accomplished!

Be Happy For Others

Elina Fairytale

Your time to shine might not be right now, but appreciate that good things happening to those around you. You’ll appreciate it more when the good stuff happens to you, and have a group of cheerleaders by your side.

Connect With Your Favorite People

ELEVATE

Nothing like a girl date to lift our spirits. Hang with the people you care about most, and who lift you up when you're feeling down. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable and let them know the good, the bad, and the sometimes ugly. If you can't meet in person, schedule some time to talk on the phone to connect and catch-up.

Meditate Or Find Ways To Manage Stress

Anna Tarazevich

A morning meditation practice or other relaxation techniques can help you refocus, manage stress, and improve your overall mood and well-being. Here's what happened when I meditated for just 11 minutes a day for one month. Spoiler: I really loved it!

Break Out Of Your Comfort Zone

Isabell De La Cruz

Stepping out of your comfort zone can help build your confidence in so many ways. Travel, adventure, even taking a class can help you see new perspectives, build resilience, and realize how awesome and strong and capable you are. Afraid of failure? Trying new things is already bringing you closer to success. Failure is a way of learning, not a setback. Shift your thinking around failure and embrace it, learn from it, and gain from it. You've got this!

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Lead image by Kampus Production

Ask anyone who’s found success in their career, hobby, or health – they’ll admit that they didn’t find it overnight. Instead, they’ll attribute their achievements to a simple concept: consistency.

Being consistent is way easier said than done, but it becomes less daunting when you’ve got someone by your side to keep you accountable.

Read on to learn more about Zabit, a new habit coaching app that empowers you to achieve your goals with the help of an expert personal coach.

Zabit

That’s why Roddy Lindsay founded Zabit, a new habit coaching service that relies on pairing clients with personal coaches – AKA the ultimate accountability buddies!

Whether you want to improve your workout plan, decrease your use of social media, limit your alcohol consumption, or get better sleep, Zabit coaches are there to motivate you toward your goals with one-on-one personalized messages, just like you're texting your best friend.

Zabit

“Zabit’s mission is to make accountability universal and affordable. Adding accountability to everyday habits to make them long-lasting should be as easy as ordering an Uber,” said Lindsay, founder and CEO of Zabit. “By combining the empathy of human coaches with the ubiquity of mobile technology, Zabit is forging a new paradigm for behavior change.”

Zabit

Zabit’s personal coaches are psychologists, wellness professionals, and advanced clinical psychology students with at least three years of training, so they’re equipped with all the right knowledge to help you stay on track with your goals, no matter what they are.

When it comes to your personal goals, it’s important to remember that you’re not alone. Pair with a Zabit coach today – you can get started now with a free 2-week trial. From there, plans start at just $8.99 per week.

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I've been working from home since long before it became the norm. And my "office" has evolved from a spindled-back chair at the kitchen table to an airy home office with a view. Back then, my productivity took a hit without essentials like adequate storage space, comfortable seating, and a bit of privacy. While it has its perks, working from home comes with its fair share of challenges; your home office setup doesn't need to be one of them.

Here are 10 ways to redesign your home office for better productivity!

Caio

1. Bad Lighting

Dim or harsh overhead lighting can strain your eyes and limit your focus. Try to get close to a window for natural light or use daylight bulbs to mimic sunlight to boost your mood, creativity, and focus. Find a desk lamp that works for you too!

Ella Jardim

2. Clutter Everywhere

A cluttered desk equals a cluttered mind, IMO. Reduce the stress that comes with a disorganized and cluttered desk by bringing in shelves and organizers; finding sleek cable-management solutions; and removing any unnecessary items to reduce visual distractions.

Vlada Karpovich

3. Uncomfortable Furniture

If you're sitting most of the day, it's so important to invest in a good desk chair. An unsupportive chair or poorly sized desk can be uncomfortable, making it harder to stay focused for long periods of time. Your back will thank you!

Ketut Subiyanto

4. No Boundaries Between Work and Home

Distractions at home like kids and partners can kill your productivity. Avoid blurring the line between work and home life by designating a private space, separate from high-traffic spaces, for your work hours if you can. Use rugs, curtains, or acoustic panels to reduce noise too.

Mizuno K

5. Lack of Storage

I get it, they're not the best-looking pieces in your home, but without proper filing systems you’ll waste time hunting for important documents or supplies. Invest in modern storage options that look good too from Mustard Made and The Container Store.

Vlada Karpovich

6. Unoptimized Tech Setup

Slow Internet or outdated tech tools can make you feel totally frustrated and can slow down your productivity. Upgrade your Internet to a faster connection, and refresh your tech gadgets and programs to make sure you work more efficiently.

Ivan Samkov

7. Awkward Desk Placement

Placing your desk in a spot with too much noise, traffic, or distractions — like facing a TV — will guarantee to disrupt your concentration. Find a more zen spot where you can focus on the tasks of the day.

Anna Shvets

8. Ignoring Ergonomics

Check your monitor height, keyboard positioning, and add a wrist rest so you don't lead to feeling uncomfortable and fatigued, cutting your workday short.

Mikhail Nilov

9. Lack of Personalization

A sterile, uninspiring office design does your motivation and creativity no favors. Make work feel less like a chore by adding personal touches through artwork, personal photos, candles, some fresh flowers or plants. Greenery can improve air quality and actually reduce work stress. Add a little snack station for quick energy boosts and keep water handy. Also, your Zoom backgrounds should reflect your personality!

Serpstat

10. No Inspiration

No matter what you do — whether it's a creative work or something more analytical — you want to feel inspired. Personalization can help, but dive into vision boards, books, magazines, quotes that inspire your work and help you bring fresh ideas to your workday. Color psychology can help too: blues and greens encourage focus and reduce stress while pops of yellow or orange can spark creativity! Break out the paint if needed!

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The astrology for this week will reflect sensitive, dreamy, unfocused energy and yet it also stimulates a real pathway to our personal evolution through creativity, spirituality, and sensuality. On January 11, the nodes of the Moon, representing our collective transformation will change from the dynamic paradox of Aries and Libra to the dreamy manifesting axis of Pisces and Virgo. We are collectively encouraged to let go of our need to control and release tendencies of perfectionism. Instead, trust and faith are emphasized. I will talk more about this in future writings.

Keep reading to see your lucky weekly horoscope for the week of January 5-12, 2025.

What's happening astrologically during January 5-12, 2025?

Destiny Buchman/Dupe Photos

Mars, the planet of action, is traversing the tender, family-oriented sign of Cancer on its retrograde track this week. Memories will likely surface that either make us nostalgic for better times or remind us of painful times we thought were safely in the past. Use this energy to face whatever comes up, learn from the lessons your memories provide, and move forward to create the life you desire.

Mars has a lot of power, and while it is retrograde, it is wise to take things slowly, try not to rush, but also to take action to harness what you need to grow. Look back in your journal or photo library in October through early November 2024, when Mars was direct in Cancer. Did something become evident during that time that tugged at your heartstrings? We will all yearn for a simpler time. Mars will turn direct again in February 2025 and will remain in Cancer until mid-April. These months will likely be bittersweet. Practice self-care and self-compassion.

Daisy Davis/Dupe Photos

Our reflections of the past are a catalyst to healing. If we can face, accept, and own our vulnerabilities, we can rise above any self-limiting beliefs. The energies support exercising our capacity for resilience. On January 8th, Chiron, the wounded healer and Shaman of the Zodiac in Aries, is squaring the Sun in Capricorn.

Don’t believe everything you think, as Mercury in Sagittarius squares Neptune in Pisces on January 6th. Events will likely be dramatic on the world stage, and unless you thrive in a dramatic environment, it is best to lay low until Mercury moves into the stable, practical sign of Capricorn on January 8th. Use the early part of the week to get creative, practice your art, or spend time meditating, doing yoga, or walking in nature. Stay clear of mind-altering drugs or alcohol as things will be hazy or confusing. If you must engage in important business or legal matters, be sure to consult a professional to get advice or to review important documents before signing the bottom line.

Jenna Langford/Dupe Photos

Acts of kindness, courage, and standing up for the underdog will fulfill an essential need to be part of your community. This week is an excellent time to volunteer at the local food bank or to walk dogs at the local shelter. Ask yourself, “How can I make the world a better place?” and act on every chance you get to be courteous, kind, and generous as Mars forms a trine with Neptune, exact on January 12.

If you would like to know more about how these and other transits affect you personally, contact me at SevenSistersAstrology.com for a reading.

Read Your Weekly Horoscope For Your Sun & Rising Signs

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Aries (March 21 – April 19)

You will likely crave anything that provides a new experience or an expanded viewpoint. It is a perfect time to broaden your horizons, be it through travel or learning. Make sure you are motivated by more than boredom but by a true desire to grow and learn. Take advantage of this opportunity to synthesize your life by joining together seemingly disparate parts. The big picture will become clear if you consciously seek ways to learn and grow.

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Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Your emotions will be heightened this week. You might find yourself attracted to intense people and a desire to experience life on more soulful or profound levels. Allow yourself to explore these emotions. Spend time in quiet contemplation to get clear about what it means to live life in a more profound way. Take advantage of any opportunity to express yourself about topics that are usually taboo or not easy to discuss.

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Gemini (May 21 – June 20)

In your personal life, you can successfully broach sensitive topics with your loved ones to create more harmonious relationships. Use compassionate language and approach each opportunity to get closer with patience and kindness. In your professional life, negotiations are favored if you meet each occasion with respect and a desire for long-term collaboration. Communicate with a desire for reciprocity and fairness for all concerned.

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Cancer (June 21 – July 22)

Focus on details, stay organized, and be ready for any mutually beneficial encounters as you actively pursue your goals. Your intellect will be keen, and you will have an eye toward practical, achievable solutions. Strive to maintain an energetic balance in your activities and tend to your mental, physical, spiritual, and emotional health. This is potentially a busy week; keep any anxieties in check and practice mindfulness daily.

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Leo (July 23 – August 22)

Take advantage of every opportunity to express yourself creatively and clearly. Don’t forget to interject playfulness and joyfulness in your life. Connect with your natural child-like enthusiasm and approach everything you can with curiosity and wonder. Engage in lively conversations whenever you can. Interactions with strangers, through social media or in direct conversations, will illuminate your strengths and unique attributes. You are an essential part of the greater fabric of life, and the more you express yourself, the clearer that becomes to you.

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Virgo (August 23 – September 22)

Dig deep to access your courage this week. Don’t let a fear of criticism or failure keep you from pursuing your goals. Seek like-minded allies and use family connections for support. Rely on your sharp intellect to communicate. Focus on solid solutions and practical proposals. Keep in mind that what you actively strive for needs to benefit not only yourself but those around you, as well. You are entering a powerful time to align your desires with the zeitgeist.

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Libra (September 23 – October 22)

Your mental abilities are strong. Use your sharp intellect to maintain curiosity and keep an open mind to learn new things. Listen more than talk as your conversations will broaden your horizons; challenge the status quo by expanding your understanding. This is a time for gathering information and knowledge from a wide variety of sources to tap into solutions that apply to a wide audience. Remain adaptable, flexible, and open-minded.

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Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)

This is a critical time to integrate your internal value system with the outer manifestations of your life. How do your financial and material realities reflect your deeper beliefs? It is a time to align these parts of your life. Use your strong rational mind in balance with your acute inner intuition when faced with making choices and decisions. Our bodies hold accumulated wisdom from our lives and our ancestors’ lives. Tap into how a choice feels in your body before acting.

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Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)

Conversations this week offer a chance to not only articulate your ideas but to refine them. The seeds you plant, if properly tended to, will likely result in successful endeavors. Use this time to expand your ideas by engaging with people who may not think or believe as you do. Travel during this time will be especially fruitful as you will be forced to see life from a fresh perspective. You might also be interested in changing your appearance and the way you present yourself to the world. Observe any reactions to these changes from a curious viewpoint.

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Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)

Solitude is essential as you connect with the deep layers of your essence. Hidden facets of your nature are yearning to come to your awareness, and as you take time for introspection, these obscure elements of yourself can be revealed. A clear mind and heart will allow these new parts of yourself to be released. Refrain from judging whatever is uncovered. Try expressing any newfound awareness with written words or through music or poetry. Connect with your spiritual side as often as you can.

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Aquarius (January 20 – February 19)

Use this week to network and engage in community activities. You might find yourself questioning if your social networks and friends share your dreams and aspirations. If they do, use the time to strengthen, nurture, and honor those connections. If you feel disconnected, engage in honest and truthful conversations about your priorities and visions, and listen to their dreams on an equal level. Be willing to envelop their ideas into yours to enhance compassion and inclusivity. This is not a time to go it alone but to find strength in numbers and diversity.

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Pisces (February 20 – March 20)

Your career is in focus. It is a good time for strategic, long-term planning. Envision a way to expand your skills through education or training. Invest in yourself to achieve your ambitions. Make every effort to keep the big picture in mind and not get lost in the small details. Focus on your core values as you strive for your ideals. If sacrifices need to be made to reach your goals, any short-term discomfort will be worth the effort. Emphasize your unique talents when making decisions.

Looking for a more thorough reading? Reach out to Tina at SevenSistersAstrology.com!

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The world watched as the devastating L.A. fires swept away home after home last week — including reality TV icons Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt's. To say it was heartbreaking for the L.A. community would be a gross understatement, and these two have been very open about the toll it's taken on their family. In an interview with Good Morning America, the couple opened up to share about their experience — and share the incredible way friends and fans have come together to support them.

Looking for ways to help L.A. after the devastating fires? Here's a very helpful list of resources you can donate to!

Here's how fans are helping Spencer Pratt & Heidi Montag after the L.A. fires

www.youtube.com

- YouTube

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt joined Good Morning Americaon January 15, 2025 to talk about how the L.A. fires continue to impact them. The couple shared what it was like having to quickly leave their home in a moment's notice. Heidi explained that Spencer told her to grab anything she wanted to keep, so she ended up grabbing her kids' teddy bears because she was so flustered.

When their $2.5 million home actually caught fire, Spencer got choked up talking about watching their kids' rooms burn on their cameras. He said, "Our son’s bed started just burning in the shape of a heart. The fire started in the shape of a heart. I was like, ‘This is like, out of body insane.’"

Outside of that, the couple detailed the loss beyond the material items of it all. Spencer opened up about the memories lost throughout it all, too. He said, “I feel like a ghost. I don’t have a single photo now from before an iPhone existed. I don’t have any of the dumb little things that are on your shelves in your parents’ they’re all gone. Not a single nothing.”

And to Heidi, their home was more than a physical place to live. She shared, “It’s a place that you love that you live, it’s a refuge from the world. And to have that be gone, it’s a really difficult concept to continue to daily deal with."

www.youtube.com

- YouTube

In the midst of the devastation, fans and friends have banded together to support Heidi and Spencer in a really unique way. After Spencer posted on TikTok that people should stream Heidi's 2010 album Superficial, so they can generate revenue to rebuild their lives with, people took that and ran with it. The song eventually hit #1 on iTunes, and Spencer even shared that there's potential for it to hit Billboard's Hot 100 Dance Chart, too.

And it's not just fans blasting this throwback song. Friends and fellow celebrities like Paris Hilton and Flava Flav both posted the song on TikTok. Plus, former The Hills co-stars shared the song as well, including Brody Jenner, Kristin Cavallari, and Audrina Patridge.

Heidi said, “The fan support has been such a light in such a darkness for us. It’s life-changing.”

We're sending love to Heidi and Spencer — and all the families impacted by the terrible L.A. fires this year.

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Joe Goldberg (Penn Badgley) is back for another season of snooping and stalking in New York City, and thanks to the new You season 5 teaser, we know exactly when this new TV show is returning. In addition to showing us characters from the past like Guinevere Beck (Elizabeth Lail), Love Quinn (Victoria Pedretti), and Marienne Bellamy (Tati Gabrielle), Joe straight-up says goodbye to the one person who's always been there: you. Yep, Netflix went there.

“Every season they manage to find new space to make it interesting and relevant,” Penn Badgley told Tudum. “And this season, I think somehow coming back to where it started allowed for it to just become grounded in the way that it needs to also have this kind of spectacular finish.”

Here's a breakdown of that brand new You season 5 teaser.

"Hello, you. Do you remember me? Cause I remember you," Joe asks in the You season 5 teaser, over shots of New York City and Mooney's Books. "Here we are together again, back to where it began."

"A lot has happened these many years together," he continues. "Identities, cities, loves, complications." The trailer is a walk down memory lane for viewers and for Joe as he remembers Beck, Love, and Marienne — and locking them up. Plus some fights and escapes he made along the way.

"All that led me here to now, to where I as always meant to be," he says. "And the one constant, the one thing that has always been there for me, is you. You who have been there the whole time and will be there with me to the end. Goodbye, you."

Okay, this is totally giving me Black Mirror, metaverse vibes, especially since Joe's in his creepy underground bunker with all that blue lighting. I have chills down my spine just watching this!

Is season 5 of You coming out?

Yes, You season 5 is dropping on Netflix April 24, 2025.

We've been waiting for new episodes since season 4 premiered in 2023, but the writers and stars have been planning Joe's ending for much longer. "We have some ideas that we've been talking about pretty much from the beginning," Sera Gamble told EW when she was showrunner in 2023. "It's really the debate about what kind of justice would be fair and appropriate for a guy like Joe. And then do we believe that he would get that kind of punishment? My short answer is like, maybe not from the American system. But there might be other ways. So that's the stuff we're talking about."

But whatever these writers and directors have up their sleeves, Penn Badgley promises You season 5 will come to a "perfect" conclusion. “I would love for people to just be like, ‘Wow, it’s over and I feel good and I don’t want to watch it again,'" he told Harper's Bazaarin March of 2023. And honestly, a perfect ending is all TV fans can hope for these days, right?

Who's in the You season 5 cast?

The final season of You stars Penn Badgley, Madeline Brewer, Anna Camp, Charlotte Richie, and Griffin Matthews.

Are you excited for the final season of You? I cannot wait to see the way Penn Badgley and Netflix bring the show to a close. Follow us on Facebook for the latest You season 5 news — and updates on all your favorite TV shows!