Ask An Astrologist: Is It Time To Break Up? Cord Cutting Could Be Your Answer

cord cutting

Knowing when a relationship should end is incredibly challenging, especially if you saw a long-lasting, beautiful future with that person. However, stepping out of a situation that's not right for you can be incredibly empowering, as you're taking the first step to embracing the life you want for yourself. In today's Ask An Astrologist column, one Scorpio wants to know if — and how — she should break free from a long-term relationship that's not giving her what she needs. Read more to learn how our favorite astrologist, Lumi Pelinku, suggests she finally cut the cord!

Abbey Kline

Dear Lumi: Here is my challenge: I have been with a man for ten years — someone I have deeply loved and to whom I tied all my hopes and dreams. Yet, he has shown me that my hopes and dreams will never come true with him. He proposed and then changed his mind. I wanted to start a family, but he had a nervous breakdown instead. While he wants to stay together, we are only great companions, which has been a real challenge for the past three years. The fear of never having what I want if I leave overwhelms me. So, the question is: should I stay or should I go?

-Nicole, Brooklyn, NY

Supriya Bores

Dear Nicole: A woman who knows what she wants from the start, but doesn't see those promises fulfilled often falls into a repeating pattern. Love evolves, but the mind and body can play tricks if you're not aligned with your soul's desires. Observe how much energy you have left after waiting for him to change. How much effort are you putting into making him happy? As a holistic synergy coach, I see that you have given him your mind, body, and soul, yet he hasn’t delivered on his promises of family or commitment. If you’re ready to break ties, you must believe another person can grant your wishes. The Universe reflects what we embody and experience. Patterns of disappointment and false security will persist if your partner remains stuck in his reality. This situation might work for him, but is it working for you?

Your Scorpio Sun signifies a path of regeneration and self-empowerment. Your role is to rise above outdated patterns and align with your true vision. Scorpios are on a quest to confront and transform the sources of their struggles. We all create our destinies, but when we cling to wishing for someone or something to change, it won’t unless we take action. Having strong Scorpio energy in your chart, I’ve been where you are. I faced similar fears in my marriage. I realized over time that my partner wouldn’t change, and staying made me feel depleted and cut off from abundance. I feared the grief of ending the relationship, which felt like facing death. Yet, from the other side of that grief, I can tell you that you’ll emerge restored and vibrant, like a phoenix rising from the ashes. As a Pisces Sun, I can attest that leaving was incredibly hard, but I’m grateful for it.

Hannah Quist

With your Pisces rising, you have the tools to adapt to life's changes. You’re spiritually gifted and connected, and you will become stronger as you align with your intuition. Your Leo Moon gives you the fire to attract incredible opportunities or, conversely, fall into recurring patterns. Embrace your worth, and know you deserve a love story that nurtures your well-being.

Your chart’s blend of water and fire shows powerful manifestation abilities. Believe you can attract an amazing partner, but focus on clearing your energy and moving forward. Looking back should only help you avoid repeating past mistakes. If you decide to leave, commit to moving forward without second-guessing. Breaking free will allow you to attract the life and love you truly desire. For you, as a Scorpio Sun, this is an essential rite of passage. Once you move through it, you’ll be amazed at the magic that awaits you.

With Love and Stars,

Lumi

How To Cord-Cut In Relationships

Irene García

1. Prepare: Close your eyes and enter a meditative state. Ground yourself by feeling connected to the Earth and center your energy by focusing on your breath.

2. Identify Cords: With your energy senses active, scan your aura to find toxic cords of attachment. Gently trace each cord to see what it's connected to — people, places, objects, beliefs, or past experiences.

3. Cut the Cords: Visualize your dominant hand as an energetic knife. Spread your fingers and move your hand through each cord to sever it. As you do this, say silently or aloud, "I completely release you from my life." Breathe deeply between cuts to stay centered.

Destiny Buchman

4. Send Thanks: After cutting all the cords, sit quietly for a few minutes. Send gratitude and love to what you've released, acknowledging their role in your growth.

5. Finalize: Conclude the meditation and take a shower to cleanse and ground your energy.

Join Lumi live on September 15th for an insightful astrology event held remotely! She will dive into the Lunar Eclipse's impact on each zodiac sign and experience a live sound bowl healing session to help you realign and recharge. Don't miss this chance to connect with the cosmos and yourself. Click this link to learn more!

Looking for more astrological advice? Be sure to submit a question to Lumi here!

Header image via Cora Pursley

Welcome to October. It’s time to slip into cozy sweater weather, and pumpkin-spice-flavored everything is back on the menu! Mornings are crisp and light while the trees are transitioning into a kaleidoscope of vibrant hues of yellow, amber, red, and deep burgundies – go on a Fall Foliage tour, and you'll get inspired. Also, let’s not forget Halloween, where everyone cannot help but feel a mystical pull while unleashing their wild side by throwing on a costume that reveals their alter ego.

Speaking of mystical, Libra season continues its powerful run with eclipse season in tow. It will be a revelatory month as it will help initiate changes, truth, and possibility. Let’s look at the astrology of October 2024 and observe what is in store for your sign. Read on for your sun, moon, and rising sign October horoscopes!

Astrology Overview for Your October 2024 Horoscopes

Cora Pursley

This month begins with the Solar Eclipse in Libra on October 2, promising balance, truth, and fairness to be restored in your life and relationships as you align with your heart. This isn’t a time to settle — it's a moment to start living a more authentic path.

This solar eclipse sets the stage.

On October 10, Jupiter retrograde begins, a period that will last until February 4, 2025. This cosmic event encourages you to slow down and take a closer look at the bigger picture of your goals. Use this time to turn inward and embrace spiritual lessons. Consider taking a class or starting that book you've been contemplating. This slowdown provides the perfect opportunity to map out your future dreams.

Jupiter's retrograde in 2024 allows you to become open to possibility. It begins by stepping out of your comfort zone.

The fantastic news is that Pluto Direct is happening on October 11, which will motivate you even more than you have felt these last several months.

It can signal peaceful endings and a willingness to let go of the past.

The conversations will flow in a mysterious rhythm as Mercury enters Scorpio on October 13. It is an ideal time to investigate the mysteries in your life. Probing and asking the right questions will get you the necessary answers. It is a fantastic time to begin release work and cord-cutting if you have barricading thoughts or unwelcome situations.

On October 17, the Full Moon in Aries calls in a significant moment, particularly in the realm of relationships. If you're in a romantic connection, be prepared for potential shifts in leadership dynamics. An aspect of yourself or your partnership may need to undergo review, leading to growth and healing opportunities.

Challenge leads to growth and infinite possibilities.

Patience and receptivity are crucial to navigating this intense lunation. Also, Venus enters Sagittarius on this day, igniting an air of wandering and the desire to be untethered. As you remain invested in growing with your partner or in life, you will experience a deeper connection.

Love will be an adventure.

As we conclude October, Scorpio season begins on October 22, edging in a misty vibe. It’s a perfect time to begin spirit work or personal development because the ability to become receptive to subtle information heightens. Scorpio season will reveal the steps to finding the solution if you have unanswered questions regarding your path.

​Key Dates + Planetary Transits for Your October Horoscope

Andrew Worung

  • 10/2 Solar Eclipse in Libra
  • 10/9 Jupiter Retrograde
  • 10/11 Pluto goes Direct
  • 10/13 Mercury enters Scorpio
  • 10/17 Full Moon in Aries, Venus enters Sagittarius
  • 10/22 Sun in Scorpio

​Is Your Sign in For a Big October Change? Discover Which 6 Signs Will Level Up

Cora Pursley

October 2024 is gearing up to bring some exciting changes just for us. If you're a Libra, expect a strong push for personal growth with a Solar Eclipse in your sign — it’s the perfect moment to rethink your goals and self-image. Aries, get ready to gain clear insights into your ambitions with a Full Moon lighting up your sign. Scorpio, you’ll dive deep into self-discovery as Mercury and the Sun focus on your sign, making this an ideal time for reflection. Taurus, it’s time to reassess your daily routines and health, influenced by the Solar Eclipse, while Jupiter’s retrograde encourages a fresh look at your long-term goals. Pisces, you’ll shift your focus to finances and close relationships, with the Solar Eclipse and Jupiter’s retrograde offering new perspectives. Sagittarius, you’ll shine brightly with Venus enhancing your charm and creativity, and the Full Moon will spark new inspiration for your passions. These cosmic shifts are not just about change, but about the potential for personal growth and transformation that they bring.

Read Your Sun, Moon, and Rising Signs For Your Monthly Horoscope

Brit + Co

Aries

Theme: Personal Clarity

This month, a fresh wave of self-reflection takes center stage as the Solar Eclipse prompts you to reassess your relationships and partnerships. As you navigate these changes, Jupiter’s retrograde in your financial sector encourages you to fine-tune your budget and values. Mid-month, Mercury’s shift into Scorpio brings deep insights into shared resources and intimate connections, possibly reshaping your understanding. The Full Moon in Aries later in the month shines a light on your personal goals, driving you to assert your individuality. By month’s end, Venus entering Sagittarius inspires a quest for new experiences, whether through travel or learning. The Sun’s position in Scorpio further urges you to explore your inner self and deepen connections, making it a time for transformative growth.

Brit + Co

Taurus

Theme: Routine and Health

Transformation in your daily routines and work environment is on the horizon as the Solar Eclipse prompts a thoughtful reassessment. Jupiter’s retrograde invites you to reflect on your personal goals and self-image, guiding you to align them with your long-term aspirations. Mid-month, Mercury’s move into Scorpio focuses on your partnerships, bringing meaningful conversations that may redefine your relationships. The Full Moon in Aries highlights insights related to personal introspection and behind-the-scenes matters. As the month concludes, Venus entering Sagittarius brings attention to enhancing emotional connections and exploring new ways to manage shared resources. The Sun’s presence in Scorpio emphasizes the importance of clear communication and understanding in your partnerships, paving the way for deeper connections.

Brit + Co

Gemini

Theme: Creativity and Romance

A burst of creative energy drives your month as the Solar Eclipse encourages you to reevaluate your approach to romance and self-expression. Reflect on how these areas contribute to your joy and fulfillment. Mid-month, Jupiter’s retrograde invites you to revisit past dreams and inner motivations, offering clarity on your current path. Mercury’s entry into Scorpio shifts your focus to daily routines and work, prompting a reassessment of your health and tasks. The Full Moon later in the month illuminates your social networks and long-term goals, potentially leading to significant changes. As Venus enters Sagittarius, relationships come into focus, promoting growth and deeper connections. The Sun’s presence in Scorpio further highlights the need for clarity and transformation in everyday life.

Brit + Co

Cancer

Theme: Home and Family

This month centers around emotional security as the Solar Eclipse prompts you to reassess your domestic environment and personal foundations. Jupiter’s retrograde shifts your attention to long-term goals and friendships, offering new insights into your social circle. Mid-month, Mercury’s move into Scorpio encourages authentic self-expression and exploration of new passions. The Full Moon focuses on your career and public image, potentially leading to shifts or realizations in your professional life. By the end of the month, Venus entering Sagittarius redirects your attention to improving your daily routines and well-being. The Sun in Scorpio further emphasizes creativity and self-expression, making this a fruitful period for pursuing personal projects and enjoying life’s pleasures.

Brit + Co

Leo

Theme: Communication and Learning

Your communication style and local environment are spotlighted this month as the Solar Eclipse prompts you to reflect on how you connect with others. Mid-month, Jupiter’s retrograde encourages a review of your career goals and public image, offering valuable insights into your professional path. Mercury’s shift into Scorpio focuses on home and family matters, inviting deeper conversations and resolutions. The Full Moon later in the month highlights broader horizons, such as travel or higher learning, potentially leading to important realizations. As Venus enters Sagittarius, a fresh, joyful energy invigorates your personal life and creativity. The Sun’s presence in Scorpio underscores the need for balance and emotional clarity in your domestic sphere.

Brit + Co

Virgo

Theme: Finances and Values

Financial reassessment and realignment of personal values are key themes this month as the Solar Eclipse prompts you to review your budget and financial goals. Mid-month, Jupiter’s retrograde guides you to reflect on your beliefs and plans, offering insights into educational or travel aspirations. Mercury’s entry into Scorpio focuses on communication and local connections, sparking meaningful interactions. The Full Moon highlights transformations related to shared resources or intimate bonds, leading to important realizations. Venus entering Sagittarius brings a nurturing energy to your home and family life. The Sun’s presence in Scorpio further emphasizes the need for clear communication and thoughtful connections with those around you.

Brit + Co

Libra

Theme: Personal Transformation

Personal transformation is at the forefront this month as the Solar Eclipse in your sign prompts a reevaluation of your goals and self-image. Reflect on new beginnings and how you present yourself to the world. Mid-month, Jupiter’s retrograde encourages introspection on shared resources and financial partnerships, leading to valuable insights. Mercury’s move into Scorpio shifts your focus to personal finances and values, urging a deeper review of your financial habits. The Full Moon highlights your relationships, potentially bringing clarity or resolution to partnership dynamics. Venus entering Sagittarius infuses your interactions with lively energy, sparking new connections and ideas. The Sun’s presence in Scorpio emphasizes financial matters, encouraging you to address lingering money issues and set a solid foundation for future prosperity.

Brit + Co

Scorpio

Theme: Self-Discovery

Inner growth and introspection define your month as the Solar Eclipse prompts a deep dive into personal transformation. Reflect on hidden concerns and past patterns that influence your present. Mid-month, Jupiter’s retrograde invites you to review your partnerships and collaborations, providing fresh insights into these relationships. As Mercury enters your sign, your communication and self-expression come to the fore, allowing you to clearly articulate your thoughts and intentions. Later in the month, the full moon highlights work and daily routines, possibly revealing significant changes or achievements. Venus entering Sagittarius shifts your focus to finances and personal values, offering a new perspective on your material resources. With the Sun in your sign, you’ll feel empowered to pursue your goals with renewed energy.

Brit + Co

Sagittarius

Theme: Creativity and Charisma

This month, reevaluating your social circles and long-term goals takes precedence as the Solar Eclipse prompts reflection on your friendships and aspirations. Mid-month, Jupiter’s retrograde directs your attention to daily routines and health, offering insights into improving your approach to work or self-care. Mercury’s transition into the private sector invites introspection and revisiting past issues. The Full Moon illuminates your creative pursuits and passions, leading to breakthroughs or new inspirations. Venus entering your sign enhances your charm and self-confidence, making it an excellent time to focus on personal appearance and self-expression. The Sun’s presence in your introspective realm encourages deeper self-reflection and clarity.

Brit + Co

Capricorn

Theme: Career and Public Image

Career and public image are highlighted this month as the Solar Eclipse prompts a reassessment of your professional path and ambitions. Consider new strategies to align your career goals with your values. Mid-month, Jupiter’s retrograde invites reflection on creative projects and personal joys, offering insights into how these fit into your broader life plans. Mercury’s entry into the social sector emphasizes strengthening connections and group dynamics. The Full Moon later in the month focuses on your home and family life, potentially revealing new insights or changes. Venus entering the private sector supports introspection and a deeper connection with your inner self. With the Sun in your social sphere, engage with your community and collaborate on shared goals.

Brit + Co

Aquarius

Theme: Expansion and Beliefs

Exploring new horizons and expanding your beliefs are key themes this month as the Solar Eclipse inspires you to rethink your educational pursuits and perspectives. Mid-month, Jupiter’s retrograde shifts focus to home and family life, prompting you to create a more supportive environment. Mercury’s move into a professional sector clarifies your career goals and public image, helping you tweak your plans. The Full Moon later in the month highlights your local environment and communication, potentially leading to significant revelations. Step into the spotlight — you are ready. Venus entering your social sphere boosts friendships and group activities, encouraging new connections. The Sun’s presence in your career sector emphasizes increased focus on professional ambitions.

Brit + Co

Pisces

Theme: Finances and Recognition

Expect a transformative month focused on reevaluating your financial and intimate connections as the Solar Eclipse urges you to examine shared resources and personal bonds. Explore how these areas impact your overall direction early in the month and consider any necessary changes. Mid-month, Jupiter’s retrograde encourages you to revisit past communications and learning experiences, clarifying unresolved issues and neglected projects. This is the moment for reflection and refinement — you thrive at this. With Mercury moving into Scorpio, you'll discover broader perspectives and beliefs, gaining valuable intel into your long-term aspirations. As the month progresses, the Full Moon focuses on financial matters, revealing new insights or adjustments in your approach to money and possessions. Venus’s entry into your career sector opens doors for professional advancement and recognition. The Sun’s presence in your exploration sector further motivates you to set ambitious goals and broaden your horizons, driving personal and professional growth.

Want to find out how astrology can be the guiding tool to self-acceptance and fulfillment? Click here and claim your copy of Lumi's Beginner's Astrology Book.

For more astrology advice, be sure to Ask Lumi for advice, and follow the conversation on Facebook!

I set a color palette for myself for every season. Every. Single. One. It gives me a north star as to how I style what's in my current wardrobe, and what I need to keep an eye out for when shopping. Otherwise, I tend to veer off and shop things that I wouldn't normally wear, or that won't go with what I already own.

After looking at what's currently trending for fall, it appears my color palette is spot on for this season. So, if you're curious what colors are currently in style — and how you can where them — I've got you covered! From dresses to jackets to shoes, keep reading to see the best ways you can add color to your closet this season!

Burgundy

Dôen

Dôen Elowen Skirt

I can't stop thinking about this skirt for fall — it's my #1 must-have. I just know I can get so much wear out of it, which is the testament to any piece of clothing or purchase you're going to make. I could style it with a basic tee or tank, or style it with a cashmere cardigan and heels like above. The options are endless!

Madewell

Madewell Greta Flat

A great way to incorporate new hues into your wardrobe this fall — especially if you're a little nervous to use too much color — is through your shoes! That way you can keep a simple fit, with dress or a basic top, and add an extra pop of color to your shoes. That will create a fun mixture of classic pieces, with a fun statement for juxtaposition. Madewell also has the best new arrivals for the season, so definitely check it out ASAP!

Terracotta (or Tomato Cream)

Quince

Quince Vintage Wash Dress

Maxi dresses are a staple of mine, no matter what season it is. I will throw on a comfortable, airy maxi dress over sweatpants any day of the week. This dress is not only a maxi, but it's also in the perfect shade of tomato cream, which is the "It" color for fall 2024. I love the shape, color, and even the brand, Quince! I've bought a few pieces from them and ended up loving every single one!

Cuyana

Cuyana Classic Easy Tote

Cuyana makes fantastic bags, and it's no surprise to me that they would jump on the terracotta trend with their classic tote silhouette. This spacious bag can hold just about anything, and even has a little inside pocket for goodies like keys, lip gloss, and other essentials that can get lost in the bottom of your purse. I definitely recommend throwing this over your shoulder if you're eager to try out this color trend!

Nordstrom

Mille Suki Polka Dot Long Sleeve Cotton Blend Dress

Remember what I said about maxi dresses? Well, I couldn't help but add another one! This adorable polka dot number is a lovely take on the terracotta trend! The semi-puff sleeves paired with the keyhole cutout in the bust make for a chic sort of cottagecore silhouette that I just can't get enough of!

Bright Red

Ann Taylor

Ann Taylor Tuck Stitch Cardigan

I love Ann Taylor for all their classic staples, and this red sweater is no exception! It pulls together that vintage, old money style in a more modern way which is just the look I'm going for when styling this shade of red. The gold buttons are the perfect cherry on top to this stitch cardigan.

Lucky Brand

Lucky Brand Boot Leg Jean

These classic, red boot leg jeans are on sale for only $39! They're the perfect way to make a statement for fall, while being perfectly on trend. I love them, because they make getting dressed easy. Since they're a statement piece, themselves, all you have to do is add a button down and some simple shoes for a put-together look.

Dôen

Dôen Marianne Dress

This red dress from Dôen may seem like a statement piece, but it's actually a staple piece, too. This dress has carried me through so many different occasions, and so many different outfits because of how versatile it is. It can be styled up with heels or down with flats. A gem of a piece to add to your everyday wardrobe essentials!

Green (In Every Shade)

Madewell

Madewell Belted Trench Coat

This coat, while slightly khaki-colored rather than green, is a great example of incorporating green into your wardrobe in a mild way. Plus, styling it with chocolate brown like above is another amazing way to add a popular color theme for fall! I'm all about this shade of green!

Gap

Gap Cashsoft Sweater

This sweater is made with a plush-like cashmere that is almost identical to the soft, quintessential fall fabric. It's incredibly cozy, just like cashmere, but on a budget for those of us that are trying not to spend $100+ on a sweater. This cardigan is in this autumn season, because #BratSummer is extending into fall! Grab this green sweater for a fun pop of color!

White

Dôen

Dôen Leah Dress

No, folks, this color is not going anywhere post Labor Day! It's still around, and better than ever for the fall! In fact, millennials are describing it as "old money" to wear white this fall, so take notes ladies and gentleman. One of my favorite ways to wear white in autumn is with a cream shade — just like this absolutely gorgeous Dôen dress that's what dreams are made of (at least what mine are)! I can see it as my quintessential daily fall fit paired with either flats or tall boots!

Ann Taylor

Ann Taylor White Corduroy Pants

This entire 'fit is such a look — and something I will definitely wear this autumn, including these incredibly chic corduroy pants in white. The pants honestly take the outfit to a whole other level! I like the added texture that feels fall but still approachable, and could be worn year-round.

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It's Taylor Swift's world and we're just living in it. Today, "The Alchemy" singer might be the VMAs' most-decorated solo artist, and the only artist to win Album of the Year four times at the Grammys, but when the popstar released "Love Story" as a part of Fearless in 2008, I don't think any of us knew the song would become one of the most recognizable tunes of the 2000s — or that it'd be the soundtrack for hundreds of wedding receptions, dance parties, and even marriage proposals.

Among dozens of proposal videos taking place during the Eras Tour, one video has gone extra viral for one simple reason: it captures the moments before the proposal, making it even more special. The video, posted by @lexihaen, has garnered three million likes since it was posted on July 16.

@lexihaen First time i witnessed a love story proposal and I got to be the one to record! #tstheerastour#taylorswift#swifttok#lovestory#ttpd♬ original sound - L E X 🪩

"I started recording early because I thought it'd be so cute to have the moments of before she knew," Lex writes on the video. If you didn't know what was about to happen, you'd think the couple was dancing to the song without a care in the world. But look close enough and you can see just a bit of nervous fidgeting. And NYT Bestselling Author Allison Raskin promises nerves are a normal experience.

Is it normal to be nervous for a proposal?

"I think it is helpful for the proposer to remember the moment will be special even if it isn't perfect," Raskin, whose book I Do (I Think): Conversations About Modern Marriage comes out October 15, says. "You don't have to pull off every elaborate detail flawlessly to show your partner you care and can't wait to build a life together. Also, nerves aren't inherently bad! They can be a signal that you are excited and care about what you are about to do, which can be a helpful reframe from thinking you are just panicking."

"It's very exciting to propose but also deeply vulnerable," Krystal Mazzola Wood, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist at Confidently Authentic & The Healthy Relationship Foundation, agrees. "You’re truly being honest about how much someone means to you and risking rejection which is scary. It’s natural to be nervous even if you have discussed this issue before and 'know' you will get a 'yes.'”

In the event you're feeling an extra bout of nerves, Mazzola Wood has a few exercises that can help you feel more prepared. "You will want to breathe into your belly (rather than your chest) and try to make your exhales longer than your inhale," she says, like breathing in for four seconds and out for seven seconds. Visualizing the proposal going well can give you a boost of confidence, but for those of us who like to have a plan for every possible situation, it can also help to envision the worst case scenario.

"No amount of coping well with your nerves will make them go away necessarily," she continues. "This is a big step – it’s natural to be nervous. And most people will say that they didn't feel 'ready' to take the biggest risks of their life i.e. proposing, going after their dream job, but they acted courageously anyway!"

@karolinaski2024 Help me find Jason (i think his name was) who proposed to Megan at the Eras tour Melbourne Night 2! @taylornation #melbournetstheerastour#tstheerastour#taylorswift#taylorsversion#theerastour#proposallovestory#proposalvideo♬ original sound - Karolina💕

Taylor Swift proposals have created a lot of conversation online about whether such a public proposal is appropriate or even enjoyable. "I would be so mad if my nonexistent partner did this to me lol," one Reddit user says. "I actually have a friend who is going with his girlfriend to Eras in Scotland this summer, and they are likely getting engaged fairly soon, and I’m like 'just don’t propose during Love Story.'"

Another disagrees, saying, "If a public proposal is your thing, and you’re a Swiftie, AND a conversation has previously taken place about actually wanting to marry said person, BY ALL MEANS! That is adorable!"

Should your partner have the same interests as you?

Mark Angelo Sampan/Pexels

While I personally wouldn't want to get engaged in front of so many strangers, these proposals always make me emotional. Because for there to be a proposal in that environment at all, both partners have to actually be at the concert in the first place. After having countless conversations with people who totally dismissed my 14-year love for Taylor Swift's music, and its impact on my own writing, knowing these partners agreed to go to the Eras Tour just because they love their significant other brings a smile to my face. And showing an interest in your partner's hobbies & interests, even when you're not interested in them yourself, can be the sign of a healthy relationship.

"You don't need to have the exact same interests as your partner to be compatible," Raskin says. "But it is important to respect what your partner loves — even if it's not your thing. It can also be lovely to take the time to learn more about why they like it and what parts excite them to understand the appeal — and your partner — better. You might even find you enjoy it more than you originally thought!"

"At the very least you want your partner to feel encouraged to talk about their interests with you because it's a wonderful thing to see the person you love excited about something," she adds. "And it's a horrible thing to feel like you need to hide parts of yourself from the person you love."

Getting to know your partners' interests better can, in turn, help you get to know them better. "One of the best ways to build on your friendship with your partner is to show interest in what brings them joy," Mazzola Wood says. Ask questions about their interests, and dive deeper in to why they love a musical artist, a TV show, or a video game.

"This is what it means to build a 'love map' of your partner which is recommended by relationship researcher John Gottman," she continues. "To strengthen a relationship both partners must build their love map by seeking to understand their partner’s interests and dreams. However, it’s also okay and healthy to take time to enjoy your separate interests alone. Healthy relationships which are centered around friendship do involve balance."

How to make a proposal perfect?

Jasmine Carter/Pexels

Before you pop the big question, Raskin recommends making sure you're on the exact same page. "Ideally you wouldn't propose to someone before discussing that you both feel ready to get married first. While a surprise proposal is fun, a surprise engagement is a bit too risky for my blood," Raskin says. "You want to have talked about what marriage means to each of you before committing to it."

To make a proposal go as smoothly as possible there are a few things you can do to make the process more enjoyable. "The proposal itself is normally so fast and overwhelming it can be hard to remember later," Raskin admits. "That's why I think having a plan to celebrate more intimately right afterwards can be a great addition. It will give you both a chance to process what happened and rewatch the video (a few thousand times). So maybe have a second spot in mind or a plan to go back home to celebrate just the two of you."

"The best proposal is unique and personal to each couple," Mazzola Wood says. "Trying to make it 'perfect' can take all the joy and fun out of it. Rather the best proposals are ones that honor the unique couple’s journey and interests."

While a world tour might be the perfect place for one couple, another might choose to propose at the spot the couple went on their first date, a local garden, or even at home. "The best proposal goes back to having a clear 'Love Map' of your partner," she says. "If you’re building the friendship and paying attention, you’ll know the right proposal for the two of you."

What do you think about the Taylor Swift proposal trend? Have you thought about your dream proposal, or have a funny proposal story to share? DM us on Instagram!

Lead image via Jasmine Carter/Pexels

This is not a drill – Trader Joe’s famous mini tote bags are coming back this month! According to a TJ’s representative who spoke with KCAL News, the popular totes will hit shelves on September 18. Here’s how to get your hands on one!

@athenaspud#traderjoes#totebag♬ O Fortuna - Epic Trailer Version - Hidden Citizens

The Trader Joe’s mini tote bags first dropped at the grocer in March, and shoppers went absolutely crazy for them. Some stores were totally flooded with a frenzy of customers hoping to add one to their cart. They were sold for a limited time, and there’s since been hundreds of eBay listings marking the bags up 3 to 4 (and even 6) times their original price.

eBay

According to the Trader Joe’s website, the canvas mini tote bags are crafted from a “heavy duty” blend of 65% cotton and 35% polyester. Made to be a scaled-down version of their original canvas totes, the mini bags still boast “long, comfortable handles” to help you carry your grocery hauls comfortably.

Trader Joe's

They come in four “vibrant” colors: navy, yellow, red, or forest green, and measure about 13 inches long, 11 inches tall, and 6 inches wide. The Trader Joe’s mini tote bags also feature a single side pocket to set aside certain items. They retail for just $2.99.

Trader Joe’s mini tote bags are rumored to return to stores on September 18, but right now, there’s really no telling if there will be another crazy customer frenzy for buying them. Based on previous drops, these limited-time items will certainly stir up some substantial hype, so if you want to snag one, it might be a good idea to stop in at your closest TJ’s the minute they open on September 18.

Trader Joe's

Many stores typically open around 8am, but make sure to check your local location’s hours beforehand. More importantly, when you arrive, act appropriately and ensure you’re respecting the workers there!

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In a world where people are hopping onto strange food trends without hesitation, like making pizza with naan and customizing their morning coffees beyond repair, it’s amazing anyone could still be grossed out by food. Needless to say, we still have our limits… especially when it comes to those itty bitty white worms wiggling around in our pretty pink salmon fillets (HUH?). But before you swear off these healthy omega-3-rich fillets for good, let’s understand what these worms in salmon are, why they’re present, and why you don’t have to snub your fave lox at brunch this Sunday.

Monstruo Estudio

The white worms we occasionally spot in salmon fillets are parasites called roundworms. Though these worms are more noticeable in salmon due to the contrast in color, they can be found in many white fish too — they’re just camouflaged.

But we shouldn’t be freaking out.

Huy Phan / PEXELS

Despite the fact that our knee-jerk reaction is to panic and consider things contaminated, roundworms are as natural to fish as insects are to fruits and veggies. A teeny white worm in your salmon is the equivalent to an aphid, thrip, or mite in your recently harvested greens. Yes, it’s still yucky AF, but totally natural.

Valeria Boltneva / PEXELS

The good news is that roundworms don’t pose health risks when fish is thoroughly cooked to an internal temperature of 145 degrees Fahrenheit, which is the FDA’s recommendation. When it comes to lightly preserved or raw fish — like sushi, sashimi, ceviche, or gravlax — as long as the product was commercially frozen to an internal temperature of -4 degrees Fahrenheit for at least seven days prior to preparation, parasites are terminated. (High five, fellow sushi lovers!)

Just be sure to avoid sketchy sushi joints; when you hear about people getting sick from eating at low-profile all-you-can-eat sushi spot, it’s because they aren’t handling their fish properly.

Lum3n / PEXELS

It is believed by some that wild-caught fish are more susceptible to roundworms due to the fact that they interact with an external ecosystem, while farmed fish are segregated from the wild and are fed pellets treated for parasites. This isn’t something *we* can confirm, but it’s food for thought nonetheless.

Mister Mister / PEXELS

If you really want to feast on fish but paranoia has now gotten the best of you, there is an at-home method you can try: fish candling. This method has you place a bright light beneath a fillet of fish so you can see the shadows of any worms present. You can then grab some tweezers and remove, then discard of the worms yourself. (This method obviously isn’t for the faint of heart.)

We say, thoroughly cook your fish and pretend worms never happened!

Would finding worms in your salmon deter you from eating it ever again? Let us know @BritandCo!

This post has been updated.