40 Sweet DIY Valentine’s Gifts for All Your Loves

Listen, we have absolutely nothing bad to say about chocolate. Especially chocolate on Valentine’s Day. But sometimes the same old routine of a red box and assorted chocolate gets boring, not only for us, but for our gift recipients as well. So this year, as part of our New Year’s making resolutions, we want to give out some simple, pretty, and totally DIY-able presents to the ones we love. From jewelry to accessories and yes, even a bit of chocolate, here are some of our favorite DIY valentines.

1. Clay Bead Statement Necklace: You’ve been besties since the ‘90s, so why not give her a nostalgia-inducing piece of statement jewelry? Laugh and reminisce over summer camp with this Sculpey bead necklace. (via Brit + Co)

2. Watercolor Throw Pillows: This gift is perfect for that one friend who is always hosting parties and/or rearranging her bedroom. These customizable pillows are sure to be her favorite new statement piece. (via Brit + Co)

3. No-Bake Chocolate Bourbon Balls: You didn’t really expect us to stay away from chocolate, did you? These little mouthfuls are too good to pass up. (via Brit + Co)

4. DIY XO Mug: Do you know what would go perfectly with those bourbon truffles? Some spiked hot cocoa served up in this lovely mug. (via The Proper Pinwheel)

5. DIY Infinity Wire Necklace: This project couldn’t be simpler. Make a big batch of these in a snap, then hand ’em out to your entire group of friends. (via Studs and Pearls)

6. Lovely Catchall: Everyone needs a pretty tray to catch all their miscellaneous accessories. All you need for this DIY is a Sharpie and some creativity. (via Believe and Inspire)

7. Pop-Up Photo Box: This sweet keepsake will be right at home in a shared space you and your honey find special. Open it up to reflect on all your lovely times together. (via Brit + Co)

8. Felt Mug Coozie: Craft this cute felt cozy to keep your loved ones’ drinks warm and toasty. Hot cocoa optional. (via Believe Inspire)

9. Geometric Patterned Trays: These babies can be used as a catchall or hung on walls for some unique art that doubles as storage. (via Brit + Co)

10. Heartbeat Necklace: Got someone who sets your heart aflutter? Show them just how much with this funky heartbeat necklace. (via Instructables)

11. DIY Sugar Lip Scrub: It’s our go-to winter beauty accessory for a reason. Chapped lips, be gone! (via Brit + Co)

12. Leather Conversation Hearts: Leave the candy heart boxes to the little ones. These DIY key chains are just as cute and much more functional. (via Polkadot Chair)

13. Heart Wire Ring: Need to whip up a pretty gift at the last minute? We’ve got you covered. (via Brit + Co)

14. Valentine’s Countdown Calendar: Just can’t wait for the day of love? This pretty calendar will keep track of the countdown, with a little surprise for your loved one on each day! (via Brit + Co)

15. Woven Heart Pouch: This soft leather pouch isn’t the same as actually giving your heart to someone, but it’s a pretty good start. (via The House That Lars Built)

16. 3D-Printed Roses: Last year we delivered 3D-printed roses to loves across the city. What do we have in store for this year? (via Brit + Co)

17. Heart Socks: Have your loved ones get cozy and cuddly with these socks. Apart, they may not look like much, but together, they’re as cute as can be. (via Clones ‘n’ Clowns)

18. Matchbox Valentine: These little beauties are a perfect Galentine’s gift for your ladies. Pack ’em with candy, painted bobby pins, or whatever li’l thing you think they’ll love. (via Brit + Co)

19. Painted Hearts Ceramic Cup: Give this to your most unorganized friend in the hopes that she’ll use it to manage some clutter. Worst case, she’ll have an extra cup to drink from before needing to do dishes. And doesn’t everyone want that? (via Inside My Hideaway)

20. Homemade Valentine’s Chocolates: You’ve never seen a box of chocolates quite like this. Conversation heart bark and sprinkles are much more unique than the drugstore stuff. (via Brit + Co)

21. Floral Friendship Bracelet: Your friends will always be your valentine through thick and thin. So show them your love with these friendship bracelets packed full of fresh flowers. (via Oh Joy)

22. Sculpey Jewelry Dish: With all those lovely rings and bracelets you’ve handed out, you might as well give your friends a cute dish to hold everything. May we suggest this fun DIY? (via Brit + Co)

23. Paper Heart Earrings: A simple little way to say “I love you,” these pretty DIY earrings can easily be adapted into stars, circles, or other cool geometric shapes. (via Spark and Chemistry)

24. Bud Valentine: Who needs an entire bouquet? One pink bud in a brightly colored vase would certainly make our hearts go aflutter. (via Brit + Co)

25. DIY Heart Cutting Board: This board will be great for preparing Valentine’s Day dinner, or used as a charming cheese and fruit plate to set the mood. (via Hello Natural)

26. Hand-Lettered Valentines: Put your calligraphy skills to the test with these gorgeous hand-lettered cards that will earn their place on the mantel. (via Brit + Co)

27. Heart-Covered Flats: Not gonna lie, we might just have to keep this gift for ourselves. If we start handing out pairs, soon enough everyone will want some. (via Adventures in Fashion)

28. Stamped Air Clay Desk Accessories: Be on your loved one’s mind all day with these pretty-in-pink desk accessories. A cute carved message will let them know just how much you *heart* them. (via Brit + Co)

29. Chocolate Ring Pops: They’re bold, colorful, easy to make, and delicious. Warning: Everyone who gets one will immediately be asking for seconds. (via Brit + Co)

30. Conversation Heart Rings: Unlike the real things, you won’t be tempted to eat these, and they’ll go perfectly with all your pastel knits. (via Studio DIY)

31. Valentine’s Day Gift Baskets: Nothing says #squadgoals like personalized gift caddies for all of your besties. Fill each one with their favorite goodies and treats for some eternally grateful friends. (via Sarah Hearts)

32. Conversation Heart Piñata Care Packages: Maybe someone in your life needs a little pick-me-up ahead of the 14th, and if they do, a piñata packed with love is how you cheer them up. (via Brit + Co)

33. Stitched Felt Love Pennants: You’ve always wondered what to do with the felt you see in the craft store, and now you know! Make pennants to cheer on the home team AKA love. (via Paper and Pin)

34. The Ultimate Valentine: Even if you don’t have a friend who would go b-a-n-a-n-a-s for a giant decoupage card like this, you should totally make one for yourself. (via The Glitter in My Tea)

35. Painted Mini Canvases: Sometimes a heartfelt gift is as simple as sweet nothings painted on a mini canvas. Pick wacky colors or go with the classics — just have fun with it! (via PMQ for Two)

36. Valentine’s Day Bath Bombs: It’s easier than you think to make your own beautifully scented bath bombs. You can infuse them with all kinds of goodness to help spread the love this February. (via Camille Styles)

37. Scrabble Love Coasters: A little effort goes a long way when you’re using stain and pre-cut wood slices. Make an entire set to spell out their name — or maybe even a marriage proposal. (via Blue i Style)

38. Conversation Heart Sweater: There isn’t usually much clothing in stores for this occasion, but you can make your own. You’ll be getting orders from friends who want one too! (via Studio DIY)

39. Embroidered Library Card Valentines: Instead of the tired old store-bought card, get creative and make something that they’ll want to keep around for a while. (via The House That Lars Built)

40. XO Glittery Wine Stoppers: Single on V-day? You and your girls know what’s up. Time to bust out the rosé and raise a glass to each other. The gift will come in handy later when the night is over. (via We’re Going to Make It)

Follow us on Pinterest for more adorable Valentine’s Day ideas!

(Additional reporting by Ariel Garneau)

As much as I appreciate a practical gift (like the humidifier or ergonomic desk chair I tacked onto my very adult-y Christmas list this year), there’s truly no other gift I love getting more than a good beauty find. It’s no secret I’m a fiend for all things skincare, hair, and makeup, and the holidays are prime time for the cutest products – from travel-size picks to full-blown gift sets.

The beauty lover in your life is gonna adore one (or all!) of these gift ideas. The best part is they’re all worthy of stocking stuffer status. Plus, they're all easily shoppable via Amazon. Love!

Surprise them with these beauty stocking stuffers so they can glow all season long:

Scroll on to discover what I love most about these Amazon beauty stocking stuffers!

Amazon

OUAI Jingle All The OUAI Travel Size Gift Set

This festive set includes all of my OUAI faves: a delicious scalp and body scrub, anti-frizz creme, leave-in conditioner, and a detox shampoo, which I particularly love to use when I notice any build-up on my scalp. Each pick comes in a travel-friendly size, which offers your giftee the great opportunity to test out the products before they commit to the full-size version. And trust me: they'll absolutely want to repurchase 'em.

Amazon

NuFACE MINI+ Microcurrent Facial Device Kit

This skincare tool may be small, but it's oh-so mighty. It employs microcurrent technology to tone muscles in the face and neck, resulting in a noticeably firmer face and neck, plus reduced fine lines. Just 5 minutes a day delivers results, so it's the perfect gift for the low-maintenance beauty lover. This kit even comes with a gel and brush applicator that only help to boost the skin's hydration. Forget expensive spa treatments – this at-home tool is where it's at!

Amazon

Each & Every All Natural Deodorant Best Sellers Multipack

These aluminum-free deodorants are ideal for both gals and guys with sensitive skin. Each formula is rid of artificial fragrances and irritating ingredients, like baking soda or alcohol. Though they're very au naturel, these deodorants deliver dependable odor protection (I'm talkin' all day, baby) with delicious scents like the lavender, citrus, and coconut-forward ones you get in this trio.

Amazon

Lanolips Baby Baby Balms Set

I am thoroughly obsessed with Lanolips' unique formula – it includes lanolin, which expertly mimics the skin's natural oils to heal and hydrate dry lips, elbows, and even cuticles. This cute lil' trio comes complete with three mini-sized summery scents to give your giftee a nice taste of the warmer season. You could even break up the set between three different gifts if you plan to gift a bit more economically this year.

Amazon

Grace & Stella Under Eye Patches Eye Glow Trio Set

These under eye patches are sooo nice for a quick self care session whenever you really need it. I like stowing them away in my fridge (as I do with face masks, too) so they go on cool when I apply 'em, which is especially helpful for de-puffing. This gift set is packed with 12 pairs, all boosted with niacinamide, peptides, and amino acids for brighter, more hydrated under eyes.

Amazon

Mando Acidified Cleansing Bar

This cleansing bar is clinically proven to remove and control odor for 24 hours after showering – impressive, right? The formula is free of any SLS, SLES, phthalates, and parabens, so you can feel confident gifting it to sensitive skin-havers. This scent boasts notes of mandarin, lemon, and lime, which offers a real rejuvenating boost after the busy holiday season.

Amazon

OUAI Fine Shampoo and Conditioner Set

I wish I could make you smell this shampoo and conditioner through the screen. Seriously, it's that good. Keratin and biotin help strengthen hair strands while chia seed oil nourishes the scalp. Your (or your giftee's!) hair will be full of life after a good wash. This OUAI set will supply a very luxe-feeling upgrade to the drugstore shampoo + condish they're likely using every day. I'm already plotting a restock for myself...

Amazon

Lume Whole Body Deodorant 5 Pack Sampler

Whole body deodorant is a total game changer, and it comes in especially helpful for long camping or backpacking trips. I practically slather my entire body in it when I'm in the backcountry. This sampler set comes with 5 different scents to conveniently throw in a backpack, purse, or carry-on. Or, better yet, divide and conquer with this 5-piece to fill 5 different stockings! You never know when it'll come in handy for your gift recipient(s).

Amazon

Lanolips 12 Hour Overnight Lip Mask

As fun as potted lip masks can be (I'm looking at you, Laneige), tubes like this one are definitely preferable since they're a bit easier to travel with. This mask's formula is power-packed with lanolin, hyaluronic acid, vitamin C, and ceramides that put in the work to heal dry or chapped lips while you sleep. I'm obsessed with the soft, buttery formula of this pick, mostly because it stays on for a long period of time!

Amazon

Solawave 4-in-1 Radiant Renewal Wand and Serum Bundle

I am a Solawave truther a thousand times over. Ever since testing and reviewing it, I use it almost every day to give my complexion a nice boost. The tool employs red light therapy, galvanic current, and therapeutic warmth (fancy!) to tackle fine lines. This would make arguably the most impressive beauty stocking stuffer for the skincare-obsessed!

Amazon

OSEA Undaria Algae Body Oil

Body oils, from my experience, are such a luxurious way to boost the skin's hydration when used alongside a good lotion. I like to use this OSEA pick a couple times a week since it feels so nourishing. I really enjoy that the formula isn't noticeably greasy, too. It also just smells like straight-up candy, which makes applying it all the more delightful!

Amazon

Lanolips Golden Dry Skin Salve

I clearly do not play with dry skin – and this is the toughest season for it! That's where this salve comes in: hands, lips, or feet, it deeply hydrates and protects the skin from the elements. The gentle, clean formula is friendly on eczema, dermatitis, and psoriasis, so you really can't lose when you gift this cutie beauty stocking stuffer.

Amazon

OUAI Leave In Conditioner & Heat Protectant Spray

Like I mentioned before, this is one of my all-time favorite OUAI products. I own about 5 different leave-in conditioners (don't ask, I might have a problem), and none of them are as smoothing and good-smelling as this one. Snag a travel size to make the perfect beauty stocking stuffer this year!

Amazon

Tower 28 MakeWaves Mascara

Anyone who's tuned into the viral beauty scene will adore this Tower28 mascara. It simultaneously volumizes, lengthens, and defines, all while having some adorable packaging. Plus, your giftee won't see a single smudge or clump from the sleek applicator wand.

Amazon

e.l.f. Monochromatic Multi Stick

I love keeping one of these bad boys in my purse when my face is needing a blush or lip color refresh. That's right – a single stick (shoppable in 7 different shades) can cover multiple parts of the face. The formula is relatively lightweight, and I love that it has just a hint of shimmer for the glow!

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Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

I’ve triedtons of different food trends in my day. From dumping chili oil on ice cream to concocting my very own Sleepy Girl Mocktail, nothing I’ve eaten measures up to the sheer weirdness we saw go viral on social media this year (major side eye to Dua Lipa’s pickle Diet Coke).

These are the top 5 most ridiculous TikTok-viral food trends of 2024 that left us questioning whether they really should’ve gone viral in the first place.

@claudiaeatsgood chamoy pickles are so good😋😩❤️ @Bussin Snacks #chamoypickle#chamoy#chamoypicklekit#bussinsnacks#takis#fruitrollup#mukbang#asmr#asmrmukbang#chamoypicklemukbang#juicy#pickle#mexicancandy♬ original sound - Claudia💕

1. Chamoy Pickles

People couldn't quit it with the chamoy pickles (AKA chickles) this year. I never would've guessed that chamoy, a condiment made from dried fruits, chilies, sugar, and lime juice, would be slathered atop the sourest pickles money can buy.

But the food trend didn't stop at just chamoy – many snackers stuffed their pickles with everything from the likes of Hot Cheetos, Takis, and Fruit Roll-Ups. What?!

This insanely sour, tangy treat kickstarted what the internet's coined as the 'Red 40 Diet', which certainly cannot be medically advised.

If you care for your GI tract, this food trend is 100% worth skipping and leaving behind in 2024.

@dualipaofficial

What do we call her?

♬ original sound - Dua Lipa

2. Pickle + Jalapeño-Infused Diet Coke

Diet Coke, pickle juice, and jalapeño juice = all the ingredients needed to concoct Dua Lipa's controversial 2024 drink. She loves it, but I on the other hand, do not.

Now, don't get me wrong: I love a good unexpected flavor combo, but gulping down a simultaneous dose of both pickle juice and jalapeño juice was not tasty to me whatsoever.

This trend even sparked a slew of Sonic diners to start ordering their soft drinks with pickles – but as divisive as this trend can be ("Don’t knock it till you try it," TikToker Mississippi Memaw told Food and Wine), it's just flat out weird.

@logagm

New cucumber recipe 🚨

♬ original sound - Logan

3. Cucumber Salad

If you bought a mandolin slicer recently, you might as well admit you're a victim of the TikTok-viral cucumber salad trend that made its rounds this year.

"Sometimes you need to eat an entire cucumber," TikTok user @logagmsounds off in the intro of every single one of his cucumber salad videos. And thus, the food trend was born.

It felt like I couldn't go a day on TikTok without seeing at least 5 recipes for a damn cucumber salad. When it comes down to it, I can appreciate the novelty (and taste) of this trend, but not the oversaturation. I'm gonna eat an entire cucumber one day, and get so tired of it the next. New innovations in 2025, please!

@kylekruegerr Would you try these?😂 #foodreview#seagrapes#food#review#tastetest#weirdfood♬ original sound - Kyle Krueger

4. Sea Grapes

It was like people wanted to eat the weirdest, grossest things in 2024. I can't blame 'em, especially if it's for clicks and views. But this food trend in particular literally made me want to gag – and I was only watching people eat through a screen (any fellow ASMR fans out there?).

They don't look like they're supposed to be crunchy, but they are. Sea grapes grow from aquatic plants and are filled with essentially what is a "salty liquid." They burst in the mouth when you eat them (one TikToker called them 'edible Orbeez'). Yuck.

@julieta.asmr I figured it out!! Blooper at the end 🥴 #asmr#asmrcommunity#asmrtiktoks#asmrvideo#asmrsounds#asmreating#asmrfood#asmrfyp#asmrmukbang#mukbang#asmreatingsounds♬ original sound - Julieta ASMR 🍒

5. Exploding Candies

The final (and especially weird) food trend I propose we leave behind in 2024 is these dang exploding jelly candies. They also made their rounds on ASMR TikTok, and I truly cannot stand to watch a single video featuring them.

First off, they look so annoying to consume. The fruit-shaped jellies are contained in a thin layer of plastic that's meant to burst open when you sink your teeth into it, prompting you to slurp out the sweetness inside. But what irks me the most is the fact that many people trying them can't even break the seal.

I'd rather watch someone make a simple PB&J than go to town on these microplastic-infused candies.

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Who says thoughtful gifts have to come with a hefty price tag? With a little creativity (and even more searching online), you can find some pretty neat gifts under $15 that are sure to impress. These budget-friendly finds pack a big personality into a small price.

Check out the 16 best gifts under $15:

These are our top favorite gifts under $15!

Anthropologie

Anthropologie Bistro Tile Monogram Mug

Nothing beats a personalized gift. Even if it's just their initial on a stylish mug like this one, they're gonna love it. Morning coffees will never be the same!

Anthropologie

Daily Practice Athletic Icon Socks

These socks will allow your giftee to truly start their day off with a smile. They're perfect for workouts, walks, or even just lazy days spent at home.

Flewd

Flewd Ache-Erasing Bath Soak

This bath soak is specially designed to work out and relieve tight knots in muscles and achy joints – the perfect gift under $15 for your pals who are always nagging about their back pain.

Amazon

Compendium ThoughtFulls Pop-Open Cards

This deck of thoughtful pop-open cards delivers 30 different inspiring messages that are sure to brighten anyone's day.

Amazon

Tony's Chocolonely Chocolate Bar Variety Pack

This sustainably-made chocolate that comes in cheery rainbow packaging is an instant boost (sugar rush included) for anyone's holiday season. You could even divide up this 6-pack among different family members and friends for a tasty stocking stuffer.

Anthropologie

Capri Blue Mini Volcano Hand Cream

This stuff smells like heaven. Now, with this travel-size tube, they can take Capri Blue's iconic Volcano scent anywhere.

Urban Outfitters

Craighill Wilson Brass Keyring

For the always put-together and design forward, this brass keyring pushes the boundaries of what you thought you knew about carabiners.

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Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

First loves are TOUGH — especially when you start to see all the red flags you missed along the way once it's over. If you've been dissecting your own early love stories by reading Reddit threads or chatting with your girlfriends about their own relationship experiences, just know this: you're not alone! The entire Brit + Co staff even found ourselves discussing the first person we ever fell in love with...and the recounts did not disappoint. From realizing 19 seemed to be a common age for our all-time worst relationships to understanding how our first love was probably not as ideal as we originally thought, it made us wonder why we couldn't pinpoint red flags back then.

Licensed Psychotherapist Prerna Menon, founder of Boundless, LCSW-PLLC and Licensed marriage and family therapist Joseph Cavins, LMFT have a few thoughts that have helped us decode the precarious time in our lives.

Here's why some of us ignored how awful our first love might've been

1. We thought our first love was perfect and would argue with anyone who wanted us to take things slow with them.

Savannah Dematteo

I'll never forget the first time I fell in love at 19. I thought my ex was the "wind beneath my wings" because he had a great sense of humor and was creative like me. I told myself he was the person I was going to marry so I was offended when my parents didn't think he was mature enough to be in a serious relationship. If this sounds familiar, pull up a chair because Menon explains why we tend to idealize our first love.

"Your first love is your first experience with romantic love too, hence you typically see it with rose-colored glasses. The overwhelming emotion is often infatuation, which tends to overshadow the more critical and analytical part of our brain," she says. Sadly, this sounds like something my parents told me before but I couldn't fathom how true it was as a teen.

As the Clinical Director at Southern California Sunrise Recovery Center, Cavins has seen this play out before too. He says, "In your first relationship, there is a tendency to put your partner on a pedestal. The excitement of new love can create a powerful emotional fog that makes it hard to see flaws clearly."

Essentially, this "excitement of having a boyfriend, girlfriend, or partner supersedes" our ability to questions things we normally wouldn't put up with, according to Menon.

2. We tried to ignore the how many times our first loves disagreed with our values or goals.

Keira Burton

While some couples are able to make their relationship work despite having a different outlook on life, sometimes it can be a sign that things aren't going to work long-term. Cavins says, "One major red flag is disregarding differences in values or goals for the future. For instance, you wish to become a parent someday while your spouse swears this will never happen— or vice versa. Early on, you might dismiss these differences, believing love will conquer all. However, these mismatched priorities can lead to resentment and challenges over time."

Honestly, I probably should've ran whenever my ex would mock my belief in God only for us to have to attend his mother and stepfather's church whenever I visited. There was so much confusion there, but I tried to dismiss it as something he needed time to work out.

Menon adds, "If this relationship makes you feel like you'e standing in quick sand - where you are trying to move forward but often feel held back in your individual aspirations, it may not be the right fit for you."

3. We thought it was 'cute' when our first loves made suggestions about which friends to avoid or what clothes to wear.

Luis Zambrano

Cavins says, "Excessively possessive behaviors are another red flag that people often ignore easily when they fall in love for the first time. People tend to justify such behaviors by citing that it's due to love or protective instincts." I'm all for being in a relationship where your partner's able to see different sides of a picture, but controlling behavior shouldn't come with that. What might that look like?

Cavins says, "Your partner may frequently check in on you, offer opinions on who you should spend time with, or subtly pressure you into making choices that suit them." For example, your partner could start off making suggestions about your style that slowly morph into them controlling everything you wear. Somehow I went from being a self-professed 'girly-girl' to trying to emulate the style of 'sneakerheads' in a short amount of time. Though I love wearing everything from New Balance to Niké sneakers now, it's in a way that feels cohesive with my style.

You may have brushed this kind of behavior off because, again, you thought it meant your first love wanted the best for you. "It is understandable that such behavior hypothetically may come off as pleasant or affirming; however, they often signal an unhealthy dynamic of control rather than mutual respect," says

4. We always gave in when our first loves forced us to be affectionate.

Adely

*Sigh* I'm shaking my head for my younger self because there were many times I didn't advocate for myself in my first romantic relationship. I'd often give in to affectionate or intimate moments despite wanting personal space so I wouldn't be seen as 'boring' or uninterested in my ex. Menon says, "Given the infatuation, your first relationship can feel all-consuming and often is codependent. Hence, this may result in you overlooking that your partner does not respect your boundaries or desire for personal space."

Partly because the excitement of the relationship makes you want to spend all of your time together, until you don't. And then, it is often too late to correct a maladaptive historical pattern.

4. We always made excuses for why our partners would shower us with affection only to ignore us days later.

Pavel Danilyuk

Let's be clear, 'love bombing' feels confusing and awful. No one should make you feel like you're the center of their universe only to ignore your calls or texts days later. But, this probably happened while you were with your first love. Cavins says, "There's a tendency for people to brush off their first love's emotional unavailability. When, for example, a partner is not responsive and not engaging in intimate discussions or does not express their feelings, some may rationalize this as them being 'just not ready.'" If that were the case, this person wouldn't have made you feel like being with you is something they truly wanted.

Of that, Cavins believes "it's important to recognize these behaviors early" because "they can result in a one-side emotional investment that leaves one party feeling unfulfilled in the long run." Sadly, my first love would have days where he was super sweet to me only to feel like I was smothering him with attention. This is also the same person who begged me to remain in our romantic relationship when he went to basic training although I felt it would be better if we chose to be friends. Imagine my surprise (and hurt) when he told me we should have an open relationship months after getting stationed for the first time.

I should've known better because he was never 100% on board with the idea of marriage until after he graduated from basic training. Cavins calls this "emotional disconnectedness." His further explanation is this is "when the initial chemistry between the partners subsides that emotional attachment matters." To avoid this, he feels "identifying and addressing any of these is critical in a case where you are looking to create a strong and healthy bond."

5. We ignored the ways our former partner blamed us whenever they got in trouble with their parents or an authority figure.

Ketut Subiyanto

Did your first love have a hard time taking responsibility for things that went wrong by gaslighting you to absorb the blow of their mistakes? If you've furiously nodding, we should start a support group. Cavins says, "A key sign is a lack of personal or relational growth. Healthy relationships encourage mutual development, but if one partner stays stuck in old patterns while the other grows, it can create frustration and distance."

At no point should you be the reason why your first love got in trouble after answering their parents' house phone late at night after telling you to call at a certain time. It's situations like this that should've alerted us to awful behavior, but I can see how easy it is to dismiss things.

What if I'm in love for the first time and recognize these signs?

Andrea Piacquadio

First, my heart goes out to you for being in a relationship that doesn't feel healthy. It hurts when we realize the person we thought was so great is anything but. The road to letting go of idealization may be long, but you can and will get better. Cavins says, "In the process of self-healing and recovery, the first step that must be taken is self-reflection. Ask yourself all of the necessary questions that arise, such as what this relationship means for you, what your boundaries are, and what this partnership has revealed about you as an individual."

I keep saying this, but relying on journal prompts can help you unpack a lot of things and, thankfully, Cavins agrees. He says, "You could always opt to talk to a specialist or being journaling in order to find some closure and draw meaning from the experience." Also, he wants you to start "making new memories." But, don't be passive about it.

"You will have to engage yourself in activities that will help redirect the focus of your thoughts. This could include joining a new class, engaging in a hobby, or traveling that involves some independence. These experiences can help shift your mindset from loss to growth and reinforce your identity outside of the relationship," says Cavins.

Another important thing you can do is "solicit help from others," according to him. "Calling on people you trust, like friends and family, to talk about these feelings can significantly help in healing," he says. This also helped me navigate life outside of my first real romantic relationship, reminding me that I still had a lot of love in my life that didn't begin or end with my ex.

Here are Menon's tips:

  • Let yourself grieve — Let this loss run its course. If you need to feel angry, sad, distraught, nostalgic. Allow yourself the full breadth of this experience. If I ask you right now "don't think a out a yellow monkey", I can bet you just thought of a yellow monkey. We call this "the imp of the mind". When you reject feelings, or thoughts, they come back 10 times more fiercely. To move the feeling along, we must let ourselves experience it.
  • Rediscover your identity (So important) — Your first love is often intertwined with self-discovery, and identity formation. Reconsider your goals, interests, values, friendships and hobbies and try to build your own sense of identity and individuality.

Anastasia Nagibina

I saw my first love again and it feels like we're falling in love all over. Can we have a happy and healthy relationship?

I'm not going to tell you to run even though I told my ex I never wanted to speak or talk to him again. You could easily reconnect with the first person you fell in love with and realize that you're both in a place where you can have something beautiful. However, Cavins and Menon want you to be mindful if you're in this position.

"Reconnection is possible," begins Menon, "if both parties can objectively claim that they have grown emotionally and resolved the issues that held their relationship back." But, "if the reconnection is built on one person growing and the other not, it is likely to fail," she alerts. You'll need to "proceed with caution," she says because "your first love was a nostalgic era in your life that can cloud your judgement." To put it more clearly, she doesn't want you confuse "the fuzzies" with a "true knowing that the two of you can make it work."

Cavins says, "Reconnecting with a first love can trigger a strong wave of emotions, but it is important that such a decision is made with caution and a strong sense of pragmatism. Personal growth is a primary factor. Each party in the relationship must ask themselves how they have grown and evolved as individuals over time. If past patterns of conflict, immaturity, or unhealthy dynamics remain unaddressed, the same issues could resurface."

He wants you to consider these things:

  • Are there any active relationships or past engagements that would make it rather difficult? That's because the feelings that come with reigniting old flames are very strong and can alter a person’s life, making it essential to start thinking from all angles before going ahead with it.
  • Address previous challenges that caused the breakup in the first place. If the reasons behind the breakup have been resolved or do not exist anymore, then yes, meeting again has its prospects. However, keep in mind that, at times, memories can be selective and unfavorably distort the truth by overplaying the good qualities while avoiding the negative ones.
  • Only rekindle things if both individuals are in a healthy emotional state and the decision is grounded in practical, mutual considerations—not just sentimentality or romanticized memories. Clear and honest discussions and an understanding of purpose are vital in ascertaining if rekindling the relationship will be worthwhile for both parties or if it will simply be an act of revisiting unresolved emotions.

Menon's final piece of advice is similar in that she encourages you to be "self-critical, self-aware, and self-nourishing." She doesn't want you to be afraid to be "clear and transparent about your expectations for the relationship" either. Though we weren't a fan of the outcomes of our first real romantic relationships, they've made us wiser. So, shout out to our first loves for being the worst because they've become our best learning lessons.

That's not all! We have even more helpful articles about relationships & family if you're looking for everything from celebrity couples to navigating hard conversations during the holidays.

No matter how many times I rewatch The Vampire Diaries, there's nothing like seeing a cast reunion — and the weekend of December 6, we finally got to see our three favorite Mystic Falls gals together again! Nina Dobrev, Kat Graham, and Candice King were just some of The Vampire Diaries cast members who reunited for Epic Con to chat all things Elena, Bonnie, and Caroline...but things took a turn in the middle of the interview when one of the backdrops almost fell on Nina!

Keep reading to see what happened during The Vampire Diaries cast reunion with Nina Dobrev, Kat Graham, and Candice King.

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Even after all these years, Bonnie and Caroline are still saving Elena #tvd #thevampirediaries #ninadobrev #candiceking #katgraham #elanagilbert #carolineforbes #bonniebennett #epiccons

As someone who's done plenty of interviews myself, I know how fast a situation can spiral — and this interview accident is crazy. While talking on stage about the show, one of the backdrops begins to lean forward, and right before it falls on top of Nina, Candice and Kat quickly move to push it in the opposite direction.

"I don't want to see any 'Bonnie saves the day' memes," Kat jokes, referencing the fandom's love for Bonnie consistently helping the group throughout the show's eight-season run. "I don't want to see it, I don't want to hear it!" You can also see a relieved Nina hug Candice before revealing she thought it was a spider!

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In addition to this "Bonnie saves the day" moment (sorry, Kat, I couldn't help it!), the internet went crazy when Nina posted a video of her, Candice, and Kat recreating a photo they took during season 1 — especially after rumors have circulated for years that Kat Graham was mistreated on The Vampire Diaries set.

While these rumors have never been outright confirmed, fans have paid very special attention to what Kat has said...especially when she confirmedshe was the lowest-paid cast member and cried over her natural hair after revealing she wasn't really allowed to have an afro while filming.

"Love you girls so much!!!!!! 🥹❤️❤️❤️❤️" Kat commented on Nina's post, while a fan added, "And now the rumors can definitely be ended 🫶🏼❤️." These women are so powerful and clearly love each other so much, and I will take any and every cast reunion we can get!

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When Brit + Co caught up with Ian Somerhalder, he also expressed how much he loved filming The Vampire Diaries. "Every single day it was a laugh," he says. "I mean we had to be serious, you're running from ghosts and vampires and stuff, and you know, someone makes a fart joke and a 130 people erupt in laughter, there's only so much you can run for your life."

And thank goodness, Ian confirms just how much fun the cast had! "We laughed, that's how we kept each other sane," he says. "I spent 8 years on the show and now it's [been] 15 years. It's my longest relationship."

"I cannot believe it's been 15 years," he continues. "And so everyone who's seen the show, watched the show, supported us — and me — in any way, shape, and form regarding the show, I thank you from the bottom of my heart."

What would your dream The Vampire Diaries reunion look like? Let us know on Facebook!