As Seen on ‘Live With Kelly and Ryan’: My Favorite Hacks for Prepping Holiday Food

STARTERS

Whipped Feta Dip With Roasted Olives

Go easy on yourself this holiday with this Mediterranean-inspired dip that takes just minutes to make! (via The Real Food Dietitians)

Savory Stuffed Mushrooms

Serve these party-appropriate stuffed mushrooms made with cheese, peppers, and fresh herbs. (via Clean Cuisine)

Antipasto Tree

Turn your charcuterie board ingredients into a festive tree with mozzarella cheese, olives, pepperoncini peppers, and fresh rosemary! (via Averie Cooks)

Prosciutto Wrapped Asparagus

This veggie side is super simple, calling for just two ingredients and 10 minutes of prep work. Throw them in a skillet right before showtime and let the prosciutto get nice and crisp while the asparagus turns bright green and tender. They turn out perfect every time, trust us. (via Damn Delicious)

Puerto Rican Papas Rellenas

There's nothing more tasty on earth than crispy potato croquettes, unless it's potato croquettes stuffed with savory picadillo. Prepare for the onslaught, because *everyone* is going to want this Christmas Eve dinner menu idea. (via Kitchen Gidget)

Red Onion Dip

Kick your guests' tastebuds in gear with this easy and delicious dip! (via This Wife Cooks)

Maple Pecan Baked Brie

Baked brie is so ooey-gooey delicious that it's definitely one of our favorite Christmas Eve dishes, and this one calls for ingredients you probably already have on hand. Serve it as an appetizer with a crisp white wine or in place of rolls at the table. It's always a crowd pleaser and goes great with dessert. (via Fake Ginger)

Bacon Pastry Twists + Beer Cheese Dip

It doesn't have to be a game day to enjoy the this tasty Christmas Eve food idea. Serve these appetizers to everyone before dinner, or snack on them as you're preparing the rest of the food. Either way, you'll love this recipe! (Brit + Co)

Delicious Christmas Dinner Side Dishes

Creamy, Cheesy Gratin

With sweet potatoes, Gruyère, cream, and sage all mixed in together, this is one easy Christmas Eve dinner dish (or Christmas brunch idea) that you'll never leave off your holiday menu ever again. (via Brit + Co)

Shaved Brussels Sprout Salad with Pomegranate and Candied Pecans

This shaved Brussels sprout salad with pomegranate, candied pecans and a lemon dijon vinaigrette went viral and is perfect for potlucks! (via Crowded Kitchen)

Sourdough Stuffing

This vegetarian stuffing is easy and loaded with flavor, making it perfect for your Christmas feast! (via Hello Little Home)

Creamy Stovetop Mac and Cheese

Skip the box in favor of this homemade recipe that takes less than 30 minutes! (via Kathryn's Kitchen)

Kale Pear Salad with Candied Walnuts

This kale salad is loaded with pears, and cranberries, topped with walnuts, and blue cheese with a homemade vinaigrette, making it perfect for the holiday table. (via Feel Good Foodie)

Roasted Butternut Squash Salad

Butternut squash is one of those seasonal foods that's perfect in salads and adds a bit of weight to any Christmas Eve recipe. (via Brit + Co)

Pumpkin Curry

This side dish can also serve as a main course for any plant-based eaters around your dinner table this Christmas Eve. The flavors of pumpkin and vegetables keep things light and bright, while the spicy curry will warm you to your toes. (via Brit + Co)

A Green Bean Casserole for Every Dietary Need

Green bean casserole is so tasty that everyone should be able to enjoy it! With mushroom sauce, beans, and plenty of vegan and gluten-free swaps, this dish will be a Christmas favorite. (via Brit + Co)

Slow Cooker French Onion Soup

There's nothing quite as cozy as a bowl of warm soup on Christmas Eve, and this slow cooker version is about as convenient as it gets. More time for wrapping presents! (via Brit + Co)

Crockpot Salsa Verde Chicken Pozole

This green pozole is bubbling over with the goodness of peppers and tomatillos, zucchini and sweet corn, avocado and cotija cheese — with fresh baked tortilla strips and roasted pumpkin seeds on top. One bite and your taste buds will be singing hallelujah! (via Half Baked Harvest)

Romanesco Holiday Trees With Parmesan Snow

If you need a festive and easy Christmas Eve dinner idea, think of these pointy florets like miniature Christmas trees. Set them in a creamy cheese sauce and dust with Parmesan for a snowy (and tasty) side dish for your dinner. (via Brit + Co)

Pan Fried Zucchini with Basil and Pecorino

Side dishes don't have to be underwhelming before your big Christmas dinner. Whip up this delicious pan of fried zucchini with basil and Pecorino Romano cheese that will make your guests ask for the recipe! (via Vikalinka)

Sweet Potato Cornbread

If you can't wait until Christmas to treat your family something sweet, make this sweet potato cornbread to go with your meal! You can either serve it as a side dish or treat it like dessert. (via Averie Cooks)

Make-Ahead Mashed Potatoes

Make-ahead sides are a real life saver at holiday time. These potatoes are whipped up with cream cheese, sour cream and eggs, so you can keep them in the fridge until the very last minute and they'll bake up to perfection, casserole style. (via Seasons and Suppers)

Maple Roasted Brussels Sprouts With Bacon

Toss Brussels sprouts with bacon grease, maple syrup, salt, and pepper, then roast until perfectly crispy and browned. So tasty! (via Bowl of Delicious)

The Best Baked Spinach Rice

This rice casserole is rich with three kinds of cheese, spices and lemon zest. Make a double batch and hold one back in the fridge for leftovers; you'll be thanking yourself amid tomorrow's wrapping paper frenzy. (via The Iron You)

Secret Ingredient Honey Garlic Roasted Carrots

The trick to feeding a crowd with your Christmas Eve meal ideas is to make a meat or fish entreé with a plethora of easy and tasty sides. Well… nothing could be easier than these carrots that caramelize slowly to perfection in a balsamic glaze in a low-heat oven. This is one sweet veg you won't have to beg the kids to eat. (via Carlsbad Cravings)

The Best Christmas Dinner Main Courses

MAIN COURSES

Cranberry-Glazed Roast Turkey

Make a turkey full of the flavors of the season with this simple, easy-to-follow recipe. (via Brit + Co)

Baked Ham with Brown Sugar Ham Glaze

Made with a flavorful brandy and brown sugar glaze, this baked ham is the perfect main dish for Christmas. (via A Spicy Perspective)

Crisp, Golden Turkey

Here's everything you need to know about prepping, roasting, and serving the best bird you'll eat this year. You'll learn how to thought and season the turkey, as well as everything else you need in the kitchen to prepare it just right. (via Brit + Co)

Mushroom Wellington

Not just for vegetarians at the table, this Mushroom Wellington, flavored with roasted garlic, thyme and Parmesan cheese, then baked in flaky puff pastry, is an everyone pleaser! (via Julia Frey of Vikalinka)

Spiced Rack of Lamb With Citrus Salad

Racks of lamb served with a fresh, vibrant citrus salad is a unique, refreshing take on holiday dinner. (via The Original Dish)

Garlic Rosemary Prime Rib Roast With Horseradish Cream

Prime rib is always a showstopper, but the real star of this show is the homemade horseradish sauce. It cuts right through the richness of the beef, adding just the right amount of savory zing to this Christmas Eve dinner recipe. (via NeighborFood)

Vegetable Béchamel Lasagna

If you haven't had lasagna made the old school way, with béchamel sauce instead of cheese, you are in for a *tasty* treat. This is one meatless dish even the carnivores in the house will be clamoring for — definitely add it to your Christmas eve dinner menu! (via Donna Hay)

White Wine Miso Braised Pot Roast

Slow-cook a beef pot roast braised in wine with onions, carrots, and fresh thyme, serve it alongside creamy mashed potatoes for a one-pot meal that’ warms a holiday crowd. (via Half Baked Harvest)

Crock Pot Mojo Pork With Cuban-Style Black Beans

This pork shoulder is cooked the traditional way — in a tasty citrus trio of orange, lemon and lime juice, spiked with onion, jalapeño, herbs, spices and an entire head of garlic. Start it in the morning and it will bubble away happily in your slow cooker all day, giving you time (and counter space) to get the rest of the feast prepared. (via Iowa Girl Eats)

Slow Cooker Ham With Maple Brown Sugar Glaze

Ham is one of those hearty dishes that's great for feeding a crowd, but it's actually pretty tricky to get it just right. This recipe uses the slow cooker to your advantage, gently heating the meat all day in delectable juices without ever drying it out. Serve it in slices the next day for a Christmas morning breakfast add-on. (via No. 2 Pencil)

Beef Stroganoff

This 30-minute meal makes a great holiday main with tender strips of beef, mushrooms, and a rich and creamy sauce, serve dover egg noodles or mashed potatoes. (via Two Peas And Their Pod)

Ranch Pork Tenderloin

If you're making a whole feast, this 30-minute meal with the tastiest gravy and tender and juicy pork would be the perfect addition! (via Salt & Lavender)

Carnitas Tamale Pie

Christmas Eve menu ideas for a buffet cannot be complete without pie! Tamales are a tradition this time of year, but you know the old saying: It takes a village! If you're craving the flavor but dreading the assembly line, your new go-to recipe has arrived. (via Pinch of Yum)

Lasagna Bolognese With Fontina Béchamel

Sometimes you want to mark a special occasion with a challenging dish. This lasagna bolognese is made completely from scratch, including the pasta, and your guests will appreciate that effort with every delicious bite they take. (via Nerds With Knives)

Easiest Ever Lasagna Roll Up Recipe

When you love the *thought* of made-from-scratch lasagna but you just don't have the time, roll ups to the rescue! This Christmas Eve party menu idea is jump-started using store-bought ingredients, but no one will ever taste the difference. (via Crystal & Co.)

Crock Pot General Tso's Chicken

Do you have fond memories of Chinese takeout on Christmas Eve? Before you dive into your Christmas desserts, serve up this crockpot version of everyone's fave, which tastes every bit as good as the real thing in case you were wondering. (via Host The Toast)

Christmas Eve Food Directly from the Sea

Lobster Fra Diavolo

When it comes to seafood, lobster is the crème de la crème. This Christmas Eve recipe, flavored the old fashioned way with clam juice and cognac, is sure to impress everyone at your holiday party table. (via A Spicy Perspective)

Fish Pie With Cheesy Mash

Nothing beats a creamy fish pie when the *crust* is made of mashed taters. Here's a meal that's guaranteed to taste better if you eat it in your jammies followed by your favorite holiday cocktail. (via Nicky's Kitchen Sanctuary)

Whole Roasted Branzino With Fennel and Onions

Whole roasted fish dishes are an Italian tradition on feast days. While this one looks like a culinary work of art sitting on your table, it actually comes together easily and calls for just seven ingredients. (via Saveur)

Christmas Eve Sweet Treats

Gingerbread Layer Cake with Cream Cheese Buttercream

This stunning gingerbread layer cake with cream cheese buttercream is surprisingly easy to make and perfect for the holidays! (via Completely Delicious)

Dark Chocolate Shortbread Cookies

Indulge in a cookie dessert that is delicious and not at all hard to make! (via Vanilla and Bean)

Cookies With Strawberry Jam

Make these quick and easy thumbprint cookies with only five ingredients. (via The Fast Recipe)

Black Forest Cupcakes

For a decadent and delicious twist on holiday dessert, try these chocolate cupcakes with cherry filling and whipped cream. (via Barley & Sage)

Mini Cinnamon Sugar Pumpkin Muffins

These sweet fall treats are sure to become a fan-favorite when you serve them as part of your Christmas Eve dinner. (via Averie Cooks)

Fry Bread with Cinnamon Butter Honey

This recipe makes us think about funnel cake combined with yummy cinnamon butter honey. (via Completely Delicious)

Apple and Cranberry Cobbler

This egg-free Apple Cranberry Cobbler recipe is infused with vanilla, star anise, and optional bourbon, and served well with a scoop of vanilla ice cream! (via Vanilla and Bean)

White Christmas Truffle Cake

Turn this fluffy sponge cake with white chocolate truffle topping into a stunning dessert centerpiece with edible pearls and a sweet pine decoration.(via Vikalinka)

Slice and Bake Christmas Cookies

These homemade slice and bake Christmas cookies are surprisingly easy to make, taste better than the ones in the tube, and are customizable so you can choose your favorite holiday shapes! (via Crowded Kitchen)

Chocolate Beet Cake

For a healthier spin on Christmas dessert, try this unique Chocolate Beet Cake. It's so moist and delicious, your guests won’t even know you used beets! (via Give Recipe)

Skinny Peppermint Mocha

Try a low-calorie version of this Starbucks favorite you can make at home! (via The Girl on Bloor)

Spiced Mascarpone Cranberry Cake

In charge of dessert this year? This stunning spiced cake will wow your guests in terms of taste and looks. It makes a delicious breakfast too! (via The Original Dish)

Christmas Frosting Board

What a fun idea! Swap your charcuterie for a dessert board where guests can pick and dip! (via Kathryn's Kitchen)

Vegan Chocolate Orange Cheesecake

This no-bake cheesecake, made with cashew and coconut, is so delicious and stunning they won't believe there's actually no cheese. (via The First Mess)

Vegan Mini Chocolate Pies with Pecan Caramel

Mini pies are the perfect Christmas dessert because they're hand-held and bite-sized, plus these feature chocolate, pecan, and caramel flavors! They're also vegan, which just makes us love them even more. (via Brit + Co)

The Best Sugar Cookies

These sugar cookies are so good, they don't really need any embellishments, but would it really be a Christmas party without reindeer cookies?! Save a few to leave out for Santa, too. (via Brit + Co)

Peppermint Macarons with White Chocolate Ganache

Find a new way to enjoy the minty flavor of peppermint with this macarons recipe. Covered in white chocolate, it's a nod to the traditional French pastry. (via Brit + Co)

Chocolate Pumpkin Tart with Gingersnap Crust

Move over white chocolate ganache, because this pumpkintart is ready for its turn in the spotlight. We love that the gingersnap crust helps balance the rich taste of dark chocolate. (via Brit + Co)

Puff Pastry Apple Roses

These roses look good enough to eat – because they are indeed edible! It's the one time you'll enjoy stopping to smell the roses. (via Brit + Co)

Sweet Chai Latte Cupcakes

Turn your favorite morning beverage into a sweet treat with these cupcakes. The flavors and spices make for the perfect holiday season dessert. (via Brit + Co)

Paleo Christmas Cookies

Cookies will never be totally healthy, but there are definitely ways that you can make them healthier. Check out this easy Christmas dessert that's paleo-friendly. (via Brit + Co)

Vegan Apple Cake

If puff pastry apple roses feel like too much of a lite dessert, you'll want to keep this vegan apple cake recipe handy. (via Brit + Co)

Baked Hot Chocolate Doughnuts

We have a *major* sweet tooth for anything that involves gooey chocolate, so combining our love of doughnuts and hot chocolate sounds like a dream come true. (via Brit + Co)

Eggnog with Sugared Rosemary

Who says desserts have to be food? This sweet drink is a classic Christmas dessert, whether you're decorating the tree or curling up for a movie night. Our favorite detail is definitely the sugared rosemary. (via Brit + Co)

Oreo Red Velvet Cheesecake

If you love red velvet cake and you love cheesecake, then this is the dessert for you. The crust, cheesecake filling, and whipped cream come together beautifully so that every bite you take is better than the last! Plus, the Oreos on top are the perfect finishing touch. (via Brit + Co)

Frozen Chocolate Peanut Butter Yogurt Cups

Take a break from traditional Christmas desserts and make candy recipes instead! Who knows, someone may request that you make frozen chocolate peanut butter yogurt cups for their birthday next year. (via Brit + Co)

Mini Gingerbread Cheesecakes

If regular slices of cheesecake are too rich for you, try these mini bite-sized options for your next get-together. They're a little bit spicy, a little bit sweet, and just the right amount of creamy. (via Brit + Co)

Even Santa Will Want A Bite Of These Christmas Desserts!

Peppermint Bark Cannoli

You just can’t get through the snowy season without indulging in some sweet and cool peppermint bark. No surprise, it's amazing in cannolis. (via Sugar and Cloth)

Mott's Gingerbread Cups

These lil cups are a fun, festive, and fabulous treat to make with and for your little ones — or for anyone else, frankly! Just look how cute they are! (via Mott's)

Rum and Eggnog Bundt Cake

We like big bundts and we cannot lie; a slice of this, we can't deny! Flavored with rum and eggnog, this luscious cake is slathered with a generous coating of eggnog cream cheese icing that will make your tastebuds sing. (via Liv for Cake)

Vegan Christmas Cookies Recipe

Packed with nutty almonds and made without butter, eggs or oil, these gluten-free cookies are actually delicious and easy to make. Powdered sugar for the win! (via Veggie Society)

Chocolate Molasses Crinkle Cookies

Serve up a plate of melt-in-your-mouth crinkle cookies with a rich chocolate flavor.(via Whole and Heavenly Oven)

Black Forest Trifle Cake

Get creative with this trifle cake made with Black Forest layers. (via Woman Scribbles)

Coconut Balls

Make it snow with these easy and delicious coconut balls! (via The Fast Recipe)

Eggnog Cheesecake Brownies

With creamy eggnog cheesecake swirling into fudgy goodness, these brownies will make even eggnog naysayers fall in love with the soft and chewy bites. (via A Cookie Named Desire)

Chocolate Peppermint Bundt Cake

We know you’re thinking it because we’re thinking it — be still, my heart! This rich, minty, and chocolatey cake is dripping with glaze and topped with crushed candy canes. Can you say flavor bomb? (via Two Peas & Their Pod)

Champagne Donuts With White Chocolate Glaze

One of the best things about donuts is they can be enjoyed as both a dessert *and* as a sweet breakfast option. The Champagne-infused dough and white chocolate glaze create the ultimate holiday treat. (via Sugar and Cloth)

Apple and Mincemeat Filo Wreath

This swoon-worthy recipe stuffs crisp apples and mincemeat into a flaky filo pastry, resulting in complete dessert heaven. Adorned with cranberries and drizzled with custard, this treat is guaranteed to be a hit at any holiday party. (via Domestic Gothess)

Mexican Wedding Cookies

These tiny snowballs are slightly salty, nutty, buttery, and downright delish. (via Two Peas & Their Pod)

Cranberry Dark Chocolate Biscotti

We hope you’re ready for additional caffeine, because you’ll be brewing an extra cup a day just for an excuse to dip and devour these beauties. Totally addicting, these munchies are packed with nuts and cranberries and drizzled with chocolate. (via Pinch of Yum)

Homemade Marshmallows

Storebought marshmallows will never taste the same after you make these. Dip them in chocolate or add them to your hot cocoa for a truly decadent treat. (via The Real Food Dietitians)

Eggnog Panna Cotta with Spiked Cranberry Sauce

Silky smooth panna cotta may seem like a summery dessert, but when made with eggnog and topped with orange liqueur-spiked cranberry sauce, it's completely festive. (via Sprinkle Bakes)

You Won't Want To Share These Delicious Christmas Desserts

White Christmas Sparkle Cake

If you prefer snowflakes and twinkly lights to bright red and green decorations, you'll love this fluffy vanilla almond cake with cream cheese frosting. (via How Sweet Eats)

You Won't Believe How Tasty These Christmas Desserts Are

Meringue Christmas Wreath Cake

But if you do love colorful decorations, opt for this wreath cake, decked out with nonpareils and candy canes. (via Sprinkle Bakes)

Holiday Sugar Cookie Bars with Cream Cheese Frosting

Instead of rolling out dough to make individual cookies, bake up these bars, and have fun making your own sprinkle design on top. (via Averie Cooks)

Marmalade Thumbprint Cookies

It truly isn’t the holidays without some jam-filled thumbprint cookies to munch on. Though a berry jam is most commonly used, the choice of this orange jam is brilliant. (via The View From Great Island)

Christmas Tree Mousse Cups

You don't have to be an artist to make an adorable tree-shaped dollop of mousse in these chocolate cups. (via My Life Cookbook)

Peppermint Cream Puffs

Bite-size cream puffs are the ideal treat, and with a light peppermint ganache and festive sprinkles, they're holiday-ready. (via Best Friends for Frosting)

Chocolate Peppermint Mousse

We love how fluffy mousse is, and this Christmas dessert (which only needs four ingredients, FYI!!) mixes in peppermint extract for the perfect seasonal flavor. Add some crushed candy canes on top for an extra cute detail. (via Feel Good Foodie)

Funfetti Christmas Cake Roll

Don't be intimidated by the cylindrical shape; this colorful cake is both easy to bake and easy to roll up while hot. (via Passion for Savings)

Italian Pear Cranberry Tart

If the cranberry sauce at your Thanksgiving dinner didn’t satisfy your cranberry needs, this festive tart will. Fresh cranberries are piled into a shortbread crust over a luscious layer of almond cream, and it’s kind of the best thing ever. (via Just a Little Bit of Bacon)

Viennese Crescent Cookies

Popular in Austria, these melt-in-your-mouth Christmas cookies are a simple blend of hazelnuts, butter, and powdered sugar. (via Leite's Culinaria)

We'd Recommend These Christmas Desserts To Everyone

Mincemeat, Marzipan, and Apple Bread Wreath

Filled with mincemeat, marzipan, and apricot jam, this impressive buttery wreath is packed with flavor. And since it's fruity, you can get away with eating it for breakfast. (via Domestic Gothess)

Sugar Cookie Chocolate Crème Brûlée

Have more Christmas cookies than you know what to do with? Use them to top these velvety, chocolate-rich crème brûlées. (via Half Baked Harvest)

Gingerbread Bundt Cake

If you want to get real fancy, haul out your bundt cake pan and try this recipe. The patterned cake looks even more impressive when laden with a shiny glaze. (via The View From Great Island)

Slice and Bake Heart Cookies

These heart-shaped cookies are so much easier to make than you'd think. Impress your Christmas guests with a bout of sugar cookies! (via Crowded Kitchen)

Easy Puppy Chow Recipe

You probably already have everything you need for this DIY dessert recipe: peanut butter (or another nut butter), chocolate chips, Chex cereal, butter, and powdered sugar. The red and green candies are just a bonus! (via Brit + Co)

Tahini Brownies

If you can't handle full-on sweetness, try these brownies that mix in some tahini for a nutty flavor addition. The flaky salt on top adds an edge that you do not want to miss out on. (via Forks and Foliage)

Vegan Peanut Butter Blossoms

Is there a better duo than chocolate and peanut butter? These blossoms feature creamy peanut butter and dark chocolate chips for a rich, smooth take on the classic combo. (via Rachel Mansfield)

Olive Oil Orange Cake

This citrusy, just slightly olive-oily cake will brighten up your winter diet, and the touch of Grand Marnier makes it taste extra-elegant. (via Averie Cooks)

Hazelnut Shortbread with Salted Ganache Sandwich Cookies

Okay, regular Oreos. We raise you one with these uniquely delicious (and super festive!) homemade sandwich cookies! (via Vanilla and Bean)

Sugar Dusted Donut Christmas Tree by Chef Genevieve LaMonaca

For this delicious Christmas dessert, roll 60 (3lbs) white donut holes in 2.25oz green sugar sprinkles, then cover a 5.5 x 13.5-inch foam cone in plastic wrap. Insert your toothpicks (you'll need 60) into the foam, then push donut hole on the toothpick. Start from the bottom and work your way up. Add 1/2 cup peanut M&M’s to fill holes to resemble Christmas ornaments. Top with gold star cupcake topper. Cover with saran wrap until ready to use. Make up to 3 days ahead of time!

Cookies and Milk Shot Glass Dessert

Made in a shot glass, you can make this cookie dessert boozy or kid-friendly. It's play on Santa's milk and cookies, and a cute way to share with friends. (via Clean Cuisine)

Dark Chocolate Peppermint Bark

Chocolate bark makes the perfect gift for everyone on your list. (via Hello Little Home)

Candy Cane Kiss Cookies

Try this peppermint twist on the Hershey's Kiss thumbprint cookies. (via This Wife Cooks)

1. We thought our first love was perfect and would argue with anyone who wanted us to take things slow with them.

I'll never forget the first time I fell in love at 19. I thought my ex was the "wind beneath my wings" because he had a great sense of humor and was creative like me. I told myself he was the person I was going to marry so I was offended when my parents didn't think he was mature enough to be in a serious relationship. If this sounds familiar, pull up a chair because Menon explains why we tend to idealize our first love.

"Your first love is your first experience with romantic love too, hence you typically see it with rose-colored glasses. The overwhelming emotion is often infatuation, which tends to overshadow the more critical and analytical part of our brain," she says. Sadly, this sounds like something my parents told me before but I couldn't fathom how true it was as a teen.

As the Clinical Director at Southern California Sunrise Recovery Center, Cavins has seen this play out before too. He says, "In your first relationship, there is a tendency to put your partner on a pedestal. The excitement of new love can create a powerful emotional fog that makes it hard to see flaws clearly."

Essentially, this "excitement of having a boyfriend, girlfriend, or partner supersedes" our ability to questions things we normally wouldn't put up with, according to Menon.

2. We tried to ignore the how many times our first loves disagreed with our values or goals.

While some couples are able to make their relationship work despite having a different outlook on life, sometimes it can be a sign that things aren't going to work long-term. Cavins says, "One major red flag is disregarding differences in values or goals for the future. For instance, you wish to become a parent someday while your spouse swears this will never happen— or vice versa. Early on, you might dismiss these differences, believing love will conquer all. However, these mismatched priorities can lead to resentment and challenges over time."

Honestly, I probably should've ran whenever my ex would mock my belief in God only for us to have to attend his mother and stepfather's church whenever I visited. There was so much confusion there, but I tried to dismiss it as something he needed time to work out.

Menon adds, "If this relationship makes you feel like you'e standing in quick sand - where you are trying to move forward but often feel held back in your individual aspirations, it may not be the right fit for you."

3. We thought it was 'cute' when our first loves made suggestions about which friends to avoid or what clothes to wear.

Cavins says, "Excessively possessive behaviors are another red flag that people often ignore easily when they fall in love for the first time. People tend to justify such behaviors by citing that it's due to love or protective instincts." I'm all for being in a relationship where your partner's able to see different sides of a picture, but controlling behavior shouldn't come with that. What might that look like?

Cavins says, "Your partner may frequently check in on you, offer opinions on who you should spend time with, or subtly pressure you into making choices that suit them." For example, your partner could start off making suggestions about your style that slowly morph into them controlling everything you wear. Somehow I went from being a self-professed 'girly-girl' to trying to emulate the style of 'sneakerheads' in a short amount of time. Though I love wearing everything from New Balance to Niké sneakers now, it's in a way that feels cohesive with my style.

You may have brushed this kind of behavior off because, again, you thought it meant your first love wanted the best for you. "It is understandable that such behavior hypothetically may come off as pleasant or affirming; however, they often signal an unhealthy dynamic of control rather than mutual respect," says

4. We always gave in when our first loves forced us to be affectionate.

*Sigh* I'm shaking my head for my younger self because there were many times I didn't advocate for myself in my first romantic relationship. I'd often give in to affectionate or intimate moments despite wanting personal space so I wouldn't be seen as 'boring' or uninterested in my ex. Menon says, "Given the infatuation, your first relationship can feel all-consuming and often is codependent. Hence, this may result in you overlooking that your partner does not respect your boundaries or desire for personal space."

Partly because the excitement of the relationship makes you want to spend all of your time together, until you don't. And then, it is often too late to correct a maladaptive historical pattern.

4. We always made excuses for why our partners would shower us with affection only to ignore us days later.

Let's be clear, 'love bombing' feels confusing and awful. No one should make you feel like you're the center of their universe only to ignore your calls or texts days later. But, this probably happened while you were with your first love. Cavins says, "There's a tendency for people to brush off their first love's emotional unavailability. When, for example, a partner is not responsive and not engaging in intimate discussions or does not express their feelings, some may rationalize this as them being 'just not ready.'" If that were the case, this person wouldn't have made you feel like being with you is something they truly wanted.

Of that, Cavins believes "it's important to recognize these behaviors early" because "they can result in a one-side emotional investment that leaves one party feeling unfulfilled in the long run." Sadly, my first love would have days where he was super sweet to me only to feel like I was smothering him with attention. This is also the same person who begged me to remain in our romantic relationship when he went to basic training although I felt it would be better if we chose to be friends. Imagine my surprise (and hurt) when he told me we should have an open relationship months after getting stationed for the first time.

I should've known better because he was never 100% on board with the idea of marriage until after he graduated from basic training. Cavins calls this "emotional disconnectedness." His further explanation is this is "when the initial chemistry between the partners subsides that emotional attachment matters." To avoid this, he feels "identifying and addressing any of these is critical in a case where you are looking to create a strong and healthy bond."

5. We ignored the ways our former partner blamed us whenever they got in trouble with their parents or an authority figure.

Did your first love have a hard time taking responsibility for things that went wrong by gaslighting you to absorb the blow of their mistakes? If you've furiously nodding, we should start a support group. Cavins says, "A key sign is a lack of personal or relational growth. Healthy relationships encourage mutual development, but if one partner stays stuck in old patterns while the other grows, it can create frustration and distance."

At no point should you be the reason why your first love got in trouble after answering their parents' house phone late at night after telling you to call at a certain time. It's situations like this that should've alerted us to awful behavior, but I can see how easy it is to dismiss things.

What if I'm in love for the first time and recognize these signs?

First, my heart goes out to you for being in a relationship that doesn't feel healthy. It hurts when we realize the person we thought was so great is anything but. The road to letting go of idealization may be long, but you can and will get better. Cavins says, "In the process of self-healing and recovery, the first step that must be taken is self-reflection. Ask yourself all of the necessary questions that arise, such as what this relationship means for you, what your boundaries are, and what this partnership has revealed about you as an individual."

I keep saying this, but relying on journal prompts can help you unpack a lot of things and, thankfully, Cavins agrees. He says, "You could always opt to talk to a specialist or being journaling in order to find some closure and draw meaning from the experience." Also, he wants you to start "making new memories." But, don't be passive about it.

"You will have to engage yourself in activities that will help redirect the focus of your thoughts. This could include joining a new class, engaging in a hobby, or traveling that involves some independence. These experiences can help shift your mindset from loss to growth and reinforce your identity outside of the relationship," says Cavins.

Another important thing you can do is "solicit help from others," according to him. "Calling on people you trust, like friends and family, to talk about these feelings can significantly help in healing," he says. This also helped me navigate life outside of my first real romantic relationship, reminding me that I still had a lot of love in my life that didn't begin or end with my ex.

Here are Menon's tips:

• Let yourself grieve — Let this loss run its course. If you need to feel angry, sad, distraught, nostalgic. Allow yourself the full breadth of this experience. If I ask you right now "don't think a out a yellow monkey", I can bet you just thought of a yellow monkey. We call this "the imp of the mind". When you reject feelings, or thoughts, they come back 10 times more fiercely. To move the feeling along, we must let ourselves experience it.
• Rediscover your identity (So important) — Your first love is often intertwined with self-discovery, and identity formation. Reconsider your goals, interests, values, friendships and hobbies and try to build your own sense of identity and individuality.

I saw my first love again and it feels like we're falling in love all over. Can we have a happy and healthy relationship?

I'm not going to tell you to run even though I told my ex I never wanted to speak or talk to him again. You could easily reconnect with the first person you fell in love with and realize that you're both in a place where you can have something beautiful. However, Cavins and Menon want you to be mindful if you're in this position.

"Reconnection is possible," begins Menon, "if both parties can objectively claim that they have grown emotionally and resolved the issues that held their relationship back." But, "if the reconnection is built on one person growing and the other not, it is likely to fail," she alerts. You'll need to "proceed with caution," she says because "your first love was a nostalgic era in your life that can cloud your judgement." To put it more clearly, she doesn't want you confuse "the fuzzies" with a "true knowing that the two of you can make it work."

Cavins says, "Reconnecting with a first love can trigger a strong wave of emotions, but it is important that such a decision is made with caution and a strong sense of pragmatism. Personal growth is a primary factor. Each party in the relationship must ask themselves how they have grown and evolved as individuals over time. If past patterns of conflict, immaturity, or unhealthy dynamics remain unaddressed, the same issues could resurface."

He wants you to consider these things:

• Are there any active relationships or past engagements that would make it rather difficult? That's because the feelings that come with reigniting old flames are very strong and can alter a person’s life, making it essential to start thinking from all angles before going ahead with it.
• Address previous challenges that caused the breakup in the first place. If the reasons behind the breakup have been resolved or do not exist anymore, then yes, meeting again has its prospects. However, keep in mind that, at times, memories can be selective and unfavorably distort the truth by overplaying the good qualities while avoiding the negative ones.
• Only rekindle things if both individuals are in a healthy emotional state and the decision is grounded in practical, mutual considerations—not just sentimentality or romanticized memories. Clear and honest discussions and an understanding of purpose are vital in ascertaining if rekindling the relationship will be worthwhile for both parties or if it will simply be an act of revisiting unresolved emotions.