What Getting Rid Of Childhood Stuff Taught Me About Growing Up

7 Times You Should Never Send A Venmo Request

1. You don't always have to Venmo request someone for their coffee. Gasp!

I can't believe we're living in the land of $9 lattes, so I totally understand not being able to cover the tab every single time you meet a friend at a coffee shop. But if you haven't seen a friend in a long time, or, dare I say, you know they're struggling (whether it be emotionally or financially), cover the bill y'all! And if someone has opened their home to you? A coffee is the perfect thank you.

2. Don't ask to be paid back for small, generous favors.

Getting into the weeds of every little penny will turn any enjoyable activity into a nightmare. "I had a college friend who would Venmo request every person in the car for gas money when we would drive to the grocery store," one anonymous Brit + Co reader says. "Like girl, don’t offer to drive 15 minutes then."

A Reddit user also points out that asking to be paid back for a cheap favor can come off as rude. "$10 is less than 1 hour minimum wage," they says. "$30 maybe. $50 absolutely. If this became a habit, then sure. But you don't see each other regularly."

3. Don't send a Venmo request if you're helping someone who's sick.

If you've offered to help out a sick friend who can barely get out of bed, it's probably not appropriate to charge them for things like medicine, water bottles, and soup.

4. Definitely don't ask for money if you offered to cover the cost in the first place.

When I went to a movie and a friend offered to cover my soda? So kind! When they texted me the next day to ask I send them money? I was a little taken aback. I didn't mind paying for my own drink, of course, but I would have also appreciated some clearer communication...

5. Maybe don't send a Venmo charge if your friend is being generous in other areas.

I have to admit that I never realized how expensive it is to host friends. Well, one Reddit user explains that when they hosted some friends, and offered them food, one guest ended up sending a charge to cover just a couple of dollars.

"This is after I hosted her and was very generous with my time, home, and food," they say. "Charging me for crappy cheap grocery store muffins and a soda just feels like a slap in my face."

6. Do NOT send a Venmo request just to be passive aggressive.

Just like the idea that "it's only weird if you make it weird," relationships can get messy if you let them. Case in point: money situations aren't the time to be passive aggressive.

"I once quit my job at the college coffee shop to help open a local cafe and my former boss at the college...made me feel so bad for taking the new job, like I was betraying everyone," says photographer Brittany Melissa. "He randomly sent me a Venmo request charging me $1 for emotional stress. I cried. I ended up paying it and told him it upset me and then he sent a Venmo paying me $1.50 'for causing you emotional distress.'"

7. And you shouldn't send a Venmo request if you're just avoiding confrontation.

Friendship really is all about communication, and when you find yourself splitting a bill, make it clearer for everyone and actually discuss who's paying what.

"I’ve had friends in the past Venmo request me for food or for when we go out rather than messaging me & I feel like as a friend & someone I know & when dealing with money, it’s kinder to ask for the money rather than Venmo requesting," Brit + Co reader AspenGrace Ricks says. "When requesting on Venmo, it feels like there is more of an obligation to do it."

3 Times Venmo Requests Are Totally Appropriate

1. It's okay to send a Venmo request when you have communal living needs.

If you live with friends, there's no way to avoid the fact you'll be using some of the same products (unless you buy two of everything). My roommate and I go back and forth on things like toilet paper and paper towels, but when it comes to items like the folding table we just ordered for Thanksgiving — yeah girl, send that Venmo request.

2. Feel free to send a request if you're running their errands.

Listen, as someone who's in a very happy relationship with my Instacart, I understand not having time to grocery shop. But (unless you find yourself in the aforementioned "small, generous favors" situation) if you're already at the store and a friend asked you to pick up a few things just because they're short on time, I think it's totally okay to ask for them to chip in.

But if you want to give them the favor out of the kindness of your heart and cover the cost? It'll make their day!

3. Going on a roadtrip means splitting roadtrip travel essentials.

I know the internet can have some differing opinions on what "essentials" mean, but I'm talking, like, the cost of a rental car. If your friend group is splitting the ride, then everyone should absolutely split the cost. And if you ask me, the same goes for gas money!

4. Send a Venmo request if your bill had to be on one credit card.

We've probably all been there: your 6-person bill arrives to the table (where you were all very respectful and kind to your waiter RIGHT?!) and no one wants to pick up the tab. If you end up swooping in to save the day, and you've all agreed to pay your own way, take a picture of the receipt and send those Venmo requests. Dinner ain't cheap!

But even Larson has days she feels off, saying she knows that feeling "very well," and whether it's seasonal blues or mental health days, she knows routine is where she thrives — and seasonal affective disorder lamps. "Light is a big game changer for me because I grew up in California," she says.

To engage her other senses, she relies on movement, breathing techniques, and temperature changes to keep in touch with her body. "A hot bath, a cold shower, both — anything that sort of wakes your brain up and kind of jolts it," she says. "I have a pretty demanding schedule and I truly don't have room to not feel like I'm present in my life. And so you come up with ways to figure out how to do that."

That includes everything from drinking plenty of water and prioritizing sleep to packing foam rollers and bands in her carry on. "It looks like a clown bag!" she says. "I always do [those exercises] every morning because even if I don't want to do it, which I always don't want to do it, I feel a lot better after I do it."

Admittedly, that's exactly how I feel some days about making breakfast — but a powerhouse like Larson knows how important fueling our bodies is. "Pretty consistently I'm having an egg, like a breakfast sandwich, egg on toast first thing in the morning," she says. "I can't think beyond that for breakfast because I wake up so early. It's like there's no creativity happening in the morning. I'm sorry. No."

And while her mornings are all about wellness, her evenings are all about getting cozy, and she tells me her dream night in includes playing a new video game, wearing Gelato Pique sweatpants, and ordering Thai food. But when she's in the kitchen? "I've been making pasta and sausage quite a bit and I make tacos quite a bit. I mean, I kind of just do like protein and veggies and a little bit of a carb," she says.

Cozy nights in wouldn't be the same without a movie, and there's a very good chance you've seen Larson on your screen recently, whether you're rewatching Captain Marvel, 13 Going on 30, or Lessons in Chemistry. But how does the actress consistently choose such beautiful, inspiring pieces to work on? She equates the feeling to having a crush.

"When I feel like [a story] hits something that lives so truthfully in me that I just want to know if it's true to other people," she says. "I just know that we all have more that's the same than different...Film and television, it lives in a way that is beyond me physically. So I'm here talking to you, but anybody can be watching whatever they want. And so I try my best to think through what the pieces are saying so that they go out in the world and I don't get to be at the end of it and explain it or tell people what to feel or what to take from it. It lives a life outside of me. So I try and make sure that it has a complete message in it that I feel like I'll be able to live with for the rest of my life."

Just like Carol Danvers and Elizabeth Zott empower so many viewers, Brie Larson says she feels empowered by her own Hollywood heroes. "Earlier in my career, like when I was trying to visualize what kind of career I wanted, it was Toni Colette and she's still a hero of mine, but she was truly the one that I was like, 'I want to disappear into characters the way she does.'"

"There's so many incredible [actors]," she continues. "Some of them are people that are more my age and some are older than me. But that's the fun part of my job is that there's so many good people and so many things that are getting made. And so it just feels like we're constantly kind of maneuvering, and when they take on certain roles and represent certain things, it frees up for other people to do other things. And so we kind of all work as a unit."

One movie on the horizon that I'm excited for is Mattel's new American Girl movie. Like many 80s and 90s kids, Brie Larson loved American Girl dolls — and borrowed her stage name from pioneer Kirsten Larson! And just like the rest of us AG kids, she tells me she can't wait for the movie. "I've also seen that there's going to be adult Halloween costumes, which I'm also very excited about," she says. Will she be grabbing a Kirsten one for herself? "I just might!"

Q+A With Brie Larson

What's the first thing you did after you won your Oscar?

I probably drank champagne...I drank champagne and I put sneakers on, and then I went to the airport.

What's the best piece of advice you've received?

"When I think I know, I miss so much." We all get stuck in these things — I think an easy one to think about is like, you're in a fight with your sibling or your partner, and you are just so right in how angry you are. And then maybe the next day you wake up and you're like, "Maybe there was another side to that." And so we miss things when we're in a space where we believe that we know. Having an openness to what something can be or that things can be different than what you think makes things easier.

What's on your holiday bucket list?

I love the holidays. Because I'm in California, I really am looking forward to this year having a chilly winter. I love a cold winter, cozy winter. I love Christmas markets, so I'll definitely hit things like that. All the little holiday markets pop up around, yeah, it's just like a rare time when everybody is resting at the same time.

What are you watching, reading and listening to right now?

Okay. I am reading a book called Patricia Wants To Cuddle. I am watching Love is Blind season 7 because I am not silly. And listening to Chappell Roan, obviously.

What is the Oh Canada movie about?

Oh, Canada Plot

Oh, Canada follows the life of legendary (albeit fictional) filmmaker Leonard Fife. This story probably approaches Leo's career the way we think about Steven Spielberg's. AKA, he's very important. Leonard decides to tell his life story before he runs out of time. And even though he's got an impressive resumé, he also has to decide if he wants his Vietnam draft dodge and sticky relationships to become public knowledge.

"Leonard sits for an extended interview with his former student Malcolm (Michael Imperioli), relating candid stories about his younger self (Jacob Elordi) in the tumultuous 1960s and beyond," the synopsis says, adding that "at Leonard’s insistence, his wife and indispensable artistic partner, Emma (Uma Thurman), bears witness to it all."

How to watch Oh Canada?

Oh, Canada Release Date

Jacob Elordi's new movie is coming to theaters December 6, 2024 — the same day as Rachel Zegler's Y2K and Amy Adams' Nightb—ch!

Who's in the movie?

Oh, Canada Cast

The cast of Oh, Canada includes Richard Gere, Jacob Elordi, Uma Thurman, Michael Imperioli, and Victoria Hill, while the movie is written and directed by Paul Schrader (who also worked with Richard on 1980's American Gigolo!

What has the cast said about the movie?

Uma Thurman has been vocal about how excited she is to be a part of the project and told Deadline the movie feels like a "reverie" and has a "lyrical, sort of loosely knit, poetic" quality about it.

"The cinematic hand of Paul, of course, carried the day, as far as bringing this sort of illusionary dream together into something that you walk away from with the strong impression of a story," she says. "Just the presence of a master like Paul Schrader on a set of any size, is as distinct as, I don’t know, a warm wind. It’s like the wind that hits you when you get off a plane in the tropics. There’s only one thing of its ilk, and he’s kind of a master like that. You could really be anywhere; you can’t miss it."

That sounds like my kind of movie.

Director Paul Schrader revealed he fell in love with Jacob's performance the moment he saw him — which was before he took the world by storm in Priscilla. “I saw his performance on Zoom and, if this was 40 years ago, this is the guy I would have cast for American Gigolo,” he told The Hollywood Reporter.