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Annoying Wedding Guest Habits

Forgetting (Or Outright Refusing) To RSVP

We've all heard about wedding guests who choose not to RSVP to a wedding, and even worse — those who don't RSVP and bring others along for the ride when they unexpectedly show up. In Dreizen's opinion, this a major nuisance. "Bringing a plus one that hasn't been invited (or worse a plus MULTIPLE) is top of the list for unacceptable wedding guest habits. Weddings are expensive and well planned events and rolling up with people who weren't invited, weren't included in food counts, chair counts and more is super not okay," she says.

One way the bride and groom can get around this is to be firm about their RSVP expectations. The Gilchrist Collection says, "Be firm when crafting your guest list — no RSVP means there's no meal or table setting, no wedding favor, and you haven't factored them into any evening catering arrangements."

Let's say that you did RSVP to a couple's wedding, but find out that you won't be able to attend for a personal reason. It's likely that they'll be understanding, but need to know ahead of time. "Again, weddings are highly planned and exhaustingly executed events, so RSVPs are not just suggestions or nice-to-haves — they're an imperative element needed to properly organize a wedding. Additionally, if you cannot attend last minute please communicate this to the couple or someone who is representing them," says Dreizen.

Being Rude To Other Guests Or Hospitality Staff

Face palm... Clearly this shouldn't happen, but I know it does.

Dreizen explains, "I find the most unforgivable offenses being rude to other guests or those working the wedding. As a Professional Wedding Officiant I was once approached by someone's very cantankerous aunt who berated me for the couple hiring me. She battered me with questions as to why they would chose me to marry them, made rude comments about their ceremony selections and generally left a bad taste in my mouth. Respect the couples choices for their wedding, and save your snark for the car ride home."

Dreizen says, "Being rude or belligerent to other guests or the hospitality staff is another unacceptable wedding guest habit. Treating people with respect and kindness is always in fashion and always out is being rude, cruel or abusive, whether alcohol is involved or not."

This goes back to being kind to everyone at a wedding no matter if they're a guest or have been hired by the couple to help create a beautiful experience. Maybe we just follow this age old rule: if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all, folks.

Wearing A White Dress That Steals the Bride's Shine

This isn't like the 'no white after Labor Day' rule that a lot of us grew up hearing. Jenny says the rule of thumb when deciding what to wear is not to really stress about it, "...as long as you avoid an all white dress or jeans (assuming the dress code doesn't specifically ask for either!)."

Complaining About The Dress Code

"Knowing exactly how to dress for an ever evolving vocabulary of wedding attires can be tough, and I don't believe that if you put in solid effort a wedding couple will ever worry too much about what you're wearing-- they've got bigger fish to fry...," Jenny says.

That being said, don't show up in shorts and sneakers when the dress code specifically requests formal or black-tie wear. Also, don't complain about what other people are wearing just because you chose to break the rules. I know not everyone cares about getting dressed up, but the least you can do is respect the couple's dress code requirements especially if they decided to invite you.

Hot Take: Allowing Kids To Scream Or Cry Uncontrollably

I love kids, and think they can be absolutely wonderful, but...a wedding ceremony may not be the best place for them to be. Kids are generally just more emotionally impulsive than we are, so when they feel an outburst coming on, it's coming on whether you like it or not. While adults often know how to sit still for 45 minutes to an hour, that's a lot to ask of a little person.

If you couldn't find a sitter, or kids were welcomed guests, make sure to take control of the crying. Go to another room, area, or anywhere else during the ceremony and speeches if your child is having a meltdown. Nobody's gonna be mad that your kid's sad — they're gonna be mad that you didn't do anything about it.

Getting Overly Drunk

We get it. You're looking for a reason to celebrate and love the open bar option. But, you should proceed with caution if you know you're prone to certain outbursts when you drink. This could look like crying uncontrollably, becoming angry, or even getting sick to your stomach while you're on the dance floor.

For brides and grooms who are afraid of this happening, Gilchrist Collectionsuggests making sure plenty of mocktails are available for guests. They also suggest, "Opting for a sober wedding can also positively impact your budget and avoid potential fallout from intoxicated guests spelling disaster!"

Posting Pics From The Wedding Before The Newlyweds

We know you want to share a weekend or event recap with your followers on social media, but don't post anything from the wedding before the married couple actually does — particularly if there's a "no cellphones" policy. Nobody's trying to take away from your good time, but the newlyweds like spent a lot of time and effort to coordinate this event and they may just want the rest of the world to see their vision first.

However, if a couple is cool with it, post on!

Requesting Songs A Couple Doesn't Want Played During Their Reception

Some couples try to be mindful that they're grandparents may not want to know they can chant all the lyrics to Cardi B and Megan Thee Stallion's "WAP." OR sometimes they're just annoyed with certain songs that seem cliché. Whatever the reason is actually doesn't matter — if the couple said no, just don't do it.

It's not the time to be a prankster by requesting a song that's on their "no play" list. If you do want to play something, check in with the newlyweds to gauge their moods!

Proposing Right After The Wedding Or At The Reception

It may seems romantic to propose to your partner at someone else's wedding, but it doesn't always go over well. We can understand if you asked for permission beforehand — we all remember that Golden Bachelor moment — but some people make impulsive decisions when their adrenaline is pumping and just go for it without thinking about how it affects the couple they're there to celebrate in the first place.

All we can say: just don't.

1. RSVP "no" early

As soon as you receive an invitation, you probably have an idea of whether or not you can or want to attend. Decline ASAP so the host has an opportunity to invite someone else, get a refund on your seat, and plan accordingly. Plus, you don’t want to carry the burden of accepting and dreading the event for weeks. It’s way more emotionally draining, and confusing for the host.

If you do want to attend, but are unsure if you can, check your calendar and let the host know your circumstances. Perhaps your sister is expecting her first baby around the same time as your college roommate’s wedding. Reach out to your friend directly and let them know that you may be able to come, or would like to come, but it’s dependent on another important factor.

Chances are, the host will respect and appreciate your honesty. And remember: for big events like weddings, guests = money, so giving the hosts as much time as possible to make adjustments before their event is imperative.

2. You don't have to explain yourself

This is a bit contradictory to what we just said, but if it’s not an up-in-the-air type of situation, you can just say “no.” Plain and simple. Hosts don’t need a laundry list of reasons you can’t go, and you don’t need to share yours.

3. Declining is *actually* quite respectful

Responding to someone, whether it’s an enthusiastic “yes” or a “no,” is way better than not responding at all – or worse, canceling at the last minute. It shows that you care enough about the person to give them an answer, and that your friendship allows for open communication. With anyone in your life, you should be allowed to ask for what you want, and what you need. If you can’t do this for yourself, do it for Future You.

4. Don't make up excuses

It’s just a no-no. If you fabricate an excuse, it can lead to way worse (and certainly more awkward) situations. For example, if you say you can’t go deep sea fishing this Saturday (when it’s really about not wanting to fish), the person might ask you to go with them another time, evidently putting you on the hook (pun VERY intended) for future excursions.

Alternatively, if you opt for blowing them off and they find out, they’ll probably feel worse and assume your response was personal to them. Whether or not that’s true is besides the point.

Being a bit more honest always goes a long way. Oh, and BTW, refusing an invitation isn’t that deep! Truly. It’s literally fine.

5. How to say "no"

Saying no is all about what you say and how you say it. Aim for a warm, neutral and matter-of-fact tone paired with a short, candid response. Don’t beg for forgiveness (and TBH if you have to do this, they’re probably not a great friend in the first place), give them a vague reason as to why you can’t go, or get defensive if they have questions. Repeat after us: saying no is normal!

BTW – by declining an invite you have to allow others to do the same. So if someone declines an invitation to your birthday party (which we know will be totally amazing), it’s OK.

What foods are gentle on your stomach?

Foods like toast, rice, bananas, eggs, applesauce, and oatmeal are known to be easy on your stomach. I had to do a lot of trial and error over the course of a few months, and have cut my diet back to safe foods I know will leave me feeling good.

I rarely drink alcohol (shout out to these delicious mocktail recipes!!!), and I have one coffee every six weeks or so, opting for a daily chai or matcha instead. Sugar's also proven to be a pain point, so I usually stick to dark chocolate. But the most surprising foods I've started to avoid are gluten and oats. All this to say, it's all about what works for you and your lifestyle.

My go-to healthy foods for stomach problems are sweet potatoes, broccoli, Greek yogurt, eggs, chicken sausage or grilled chicken, bell peppers, and rice. I also love the occasional ginger ale.

Sweet Potatoes + Broccoli + Chicken Sausage

I will never go without sweet potatoes, like, ever again. I used to find them disgusting but they have become my saving grace on days my stomach feels awful. Whether I'm making fries, mixing them with other veggies, or turning them into vegan mac and cheese (yes, really), they're sooo versatile. One of my favorite recipes is roasting sweet potatoes and broccoli in the oven (I do 325 degrees for around 20 minutes), then adding in some cooked chicken sausage. I even add some ketchup and mustard on top for a deconstructed hot dog and fries!

​Vegan Mac and Cheese

This has been one of my go-to dishes recently, and I promise it's way easier to make than it sounds. I was inspired by this recipe from @itslivb, but since making it the first time, I've started eyeballing every measurement and adjusting the flavors. As someone who love pasta, this is one comfort food recipe that I can indulge in without feeling sick. All I do is boil cubed sweet potatoes until they're soft, then add them to a blender with nutritional yeast, salt, spices like garlic powder and onion powder, and cashews for a creamy consistency.

Gluten-Free Pasta

As someone whose comfort food is pasta, you can imagine how sad I was when I realized gluten makes me feel awful. I've been on the hunt for the best gluten-free pastas around, and after making some less-than-ideal chickpea pasta recipes, I'm totally obsessed with Trader Joe's rice pasta. Trust me on this. I can't wait to try it in this creamy avocado pasta recipe!

​Grilled Chicken

My taste buds have always loved chicken, and now that I've realized grilled chicken makes me feel so much better than fried chicken, my stomach does too! I always buy a bag of frozen chicken tenders so I can keep them until I'm ready to cook 'em up. After they've defrosted for a couple hours, I use this hack to remove the tendon, and then I'm ready to grill it! I'll eat grilled chicken with literally everything: pasta, sweet potato fries, a bunch of vegetables. I could eat it every day. Here's our ultimate guide toHow To Stop Grilling Dry Chicken For Good.

​Seafood

That being said, when I need to shake it up, salmon, shrimp, and other seafood are also great protein options. I just usually have to eat a little more to make sure I'm full. I'm dying to make These Flavorful Fish Tacos.

​Cooked Veggies

Even though I definitely prefer raw vegetables, ever since I realized cooked veggies are easier to digest, I haven't gone back. Roasting a ton of peppers, sweet potatoes, and broccoli at the top of the week sets me up for a successful — and tummy ache-free — week of meals. This Vegetable Galette is calling my name (with a GF crust, of course).

Greek Yogurt & Strawberries

I have the same breakfast every day: an egg and turkey bacon, either a chai latte or a matcha latte, and Greek yogurt and strawberries. I can't believe I never regularly ate Greek yogurt before, but now that I'm on the train, I'm never getting off. Sometimes when I want a little extra treat I add some chocolate chips, too! This dish helps fill me up without leaving me weighed down.