Why a Post-Breakup Haircut Like Katy Perry’s Isn’t Such a Bad Idea

Some days, you quickly check social media on your commute home. And others, you dive deep in the Instagram rabbit hole of checking your BFF’s cousin’s BF’s Christmas photos from 2016. (Don’t worry, we’ve been there too.) Today, all of that changes. Facebook and Instagram just announced tools to help harness and monitor your mindless scrolling time, including an activity dashboard, a daily reminder, and a new way to limit notifications. Translation? We may have just found a permanent fix to our (bad) browsing habits.

The goal of this change is a promising one — to encourage people to pass the time on Facebook and Instagram in a positive way. “Our hope is that these tools give people more control over the time they spend on our platforms and also foster conversations between parents and teens about the online habits that are right for them,” said Ameet Ranadive, Product Management Director at Instagram and David Ginsberg, Director of Research at Facebook in a recent press release.

The good news is that you can implement these time-saving features ASAP. To do so, head to the settings page on Facebook or Instagram. On Instagram click “Your Activity,” and on Facebook, press “Your Time on Facebook.” From there, you’ll see a dashboard showcasing the time you’re spending. For an added perk, you can activate a daily reminder to flag platform overuse. Or, on the days when you really need to get down to business, head to “Notification Settings” to mute these.

Now excuse us while we go enjoy some undistracted work time!

Looking for more tech news? Follow us on Twitter @BritandCo.

(Main photo via Getty; Body Image via Instagram/Facebook)

Single mother.

The words may conjure images that are neither reflective nor encompassing of the reality. If you were to think “cold, detached career woman who has neglected her children in the pursuit of her own self-interest, paycheck, and career,” or “ragged, lazy, mooching-off-of-someone-else’s-paycheck occupier of the sofa and faithful reality TV viewer,” or maybe a combination of both or somewhere in between, you’d be off. Being a single mother is knowing all too well the stretch of being pulled in 15 different directions at once.

In the morning, I exist as a student. My day begins at 4am when I jump out of bed, hurrying to turn off the alarm blaring out of my iPhone before it wakes my sleeping children. I tiptoe out of the dark bedroom that the three of us share and prepare myself for a morning of productivity (or at least, that’s the goal). The next stop is the kitchen for coffee and whatever breakfast is the fastest to prepare and consume. I complete and submit the day’s assignments to my professors and take half a second to breathe before my second shift begins.

Once the kids wake up, I exist as Mom. I give good-morning hugs, lay out the day’s clothing, pack lunchboxes, serve breakfast, and hurry everyone out the door so we’re not late to school for the second time this week. This is the part of my day that brings me the most joy. No matter how many times the same routine is repeated, I continue to be in awe of these little humans that follow me around everywhere and call me Mom.

After school drop-off comes the rush to catch my train, where I exist as a writer. Believe it or not, the MTA can be an excellent makeshift office for the writer-in-training — if you can find a seat, that is. My two-hour commute to campus is spent brainstorming ideas for new pieces or improving and expanding the ones I already have. If I’m not writing, I’m engrossed in the latest book I’m reading.

On campus, I’m back to being a student again, and a darn good one, thank you very much. My hand raised in every class, classroom discussions are my favorite. As a student of international studies, there is never a shortage of theories to grapple with, current events to analyze, or debates to (respectfully) hash out in class.

After a day’s worth of studies, a downtown A train takes me to Amnesty International, where I exist as intern. There, I scurry around my desk in an effort to complete the tasks I’m focusing on that week. Phone calls, emails, meetings, brainstorming — all in a day’s work and for some of the best causes. I’m blessed to call it my place of work.

Another hop onto the train and I’m headed home for the day. For a brief moment I exist as daughter when I pick my children up from my mother’s — their grandmother’s — house, checking in to make sure she is doing well and has everything she needs. Then I’m back in mom mode, with after-school snacks, homework help, pretend games, puzzles, Legos, and more. This is usually followed by bath time and bedtime stories, at which point I transition back into student mode to go through the readings I need to be prepared to discuss for tomorrow’s classes. And the next morning, the cycle starts again.

The reality of single motherhood is living with society’s insistence that we are incomplete without that one last piece of the puzzle we’re always told we are lacking, be that a job, a partner, or whatever else is on the menu of deprecation for the day. It is the tendency for granola bars and caffeinated beverages to become your lifeline. It is mom guilt: that pesky little thought that you are always, somehow, falling short. It is the combination and juggling of all these roles, with their responsibilities and expectations, into one very tired woman. And it is experiencing all of that alone.

My life is hectic, there is no doubt about that. Beyond the roles I play in my daily life, I also occasionally cameo as older sister, ex-wife, and friend, among other things, every day. I exist at an intersection of sorts; as a Muslim American woman living in New York City in a post-9/11 world, the parts that make up my identity can too easily feel like they are at odds with one another, and adding “single mother” to the mix makes for an extra kick. To my right is the Muslim community, with all its demands of what I should be, how I should raise my children, and how I should live my life, and to my left are the Western notions of what freedom, success, and living well looks like.

And there I am in between, this person standing somewhere in the middle who is a part of both and none at the same time, eagerly trying to fulfill all requirements that both sides have for her. Early on, my head would constantly swing left to right and back again in an effort to satisfy all demands, to be everything I was expected to be and more, often at the expense of my own best interest.

Then these two beautiful little humans who call me Mom came to mind. And I realize that there is a lesson for them in everything I do. I think back to all the lectures I’ve given them about being all of themselves, unapologetically and openly, and understand that if I don’t model that, they won’t learn it.

Through them, I’ve learned the importance of putting down roots where I stand and allowing myself to grow there, uninhibited by the demands for conformity echoing all around me. I’ve learned that in order to give the best me I possibly can to my children, I had to allow myself to exist completely as I am, marvelously and completely with all of my flaws and accept myself as such. And, moreover, to celebrate myself for it.

So, sometimes my family doesn’t fit society’s mold of what it is to be “right,” or “correct.” And that’s okay. Because at the end of the day, this parenting thing? No one is doing it “right.” “Right” is a myth.

(Photo via Getty)

This weekend, news dropped that Blake Lively filed a bombshell lawsuit against It Ends With Usco-star Justin Baldoni, and everyone is rushing to her support — including her Sisterhood of the Traveling Pantsco-stars!

One day we need to have a conversation about how easy it is to assign the 'mean girl' role to women like Anne Hathaway, Hailey Bieber, Meghan Markle, and now, Blake Lively. Since that's a separate article, let's focus on the situation at hand. According to Deadline, Lively's suing Baldoni for "sexually harassing her and subsequently enacting 'a coordinated effort to destroy her reputation.'" After the news dropped, The New York Times subsequently published article that details the winding allegations against Baldoni, producer Jamie Heath, and more players in the supposed targeted attack against her.

While a lot of public opinion turned against Lively during the It Ends With Us rollout, it's clear those closest to her showed unyielding support. Now, fellow celebrities are showing up in droves to stand with Lively amid the allegations. One bold show of support that we're totally here for? Alexis Bledel, America Ferrera, and Amber Tamblyn taking their "sisterhood" to new heights. Here's what they — and everyone else — has said in support of Blake Lively so far.

Scroll down to see everyone who's supported Blake Lively amid the Justin Baldoni lawsuit so far!

Stephen Lovekin/Getty Images

Blake Lively's The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants Co-Stars

Alexis Bledel, Amber Tamblyn, and America Ferrera made it clear that they're firmly in support of their friend Blake Lively. They released a message on Instagram that left no room for assumption about their beliefs following Blake's lawsuit against Baldoni.

The statement reads:

As Blake's friends and sisters for over twenty years, we stand with her in solidarity as she fights back against the reported campaign waged to destroy her reputation. Throughout the filming of It Ends With Us, we saw her summon the courage to ask for a safe workplace for herself and colleagues on set, and we are appalled to read the evidence of a premeditated and vindictive effort that ensued to discredit her voice.

Most upsetting is the unabashed exploitation of domestic violence survivors' stories to silence a woman who asked for safety. The hypocrisy is astounding.

We are struck by the reality that even if a woman is as strong, celebrated, and resourced as our friend Blake, she can still face forceful retaliation for daring to ask for a safe work environment. We are inspired by our sister's courage to stand up for herself and others.

For anyone seeking more information or engaging in this important conversation online, please read the full legal complaint in the investigative reporting by Megan Twohey, Mike McIntire, and Julie Tate for the New York Times.

We love the lasting, strong friendship between these four!

Cindy Ord/Getty Images

Colleen Hoover, Author of It Ends With Us

According to Entertainment Weekly, Colleen Hoover also spoke up in light of the damage Baldoni inflicted. She tagged Blake via Instagram Stories and wrote, "You have been nothing but honest, kind, supportive and patient since the day we met. Thank you for being exactly the human that you are. Never change. Never wilt." A picture of the author and star hugging followed Hoover's words, adding to the depth of the moment.

Paul Feig, Director of A Simple Favor

Director Paul Feig also shared his thoughts about what it's like to work with Blake on X. He said, "I’ve now made two movies with Blake and all I can say is she’s one of the most professional, creative, collaborative, talented and kind people I’ve ever worked with. She truly did not deserve any of this smear campaign against her. I think it’s awful she was put through this."

Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images for Michael Kors

Robyn Lively, Blake Lively's Sister

The sisterly energy is real and we're so glad Blake is surrounded by it. Robyn, Blake's big sister, shared her full thoughts in a lengthy Instagram caption just 10 hours!

While encouraging people to do research for themselves by reading The New York Times article that details the devious plot to publicly destroy Blake, she had other things to say. "We live in an age where we have access to people’s personal lives like never before — especially actors. It makes us feel like we know them. We see them on social media, watch clips of them, and make snap decisions about their character," she wrote. This reminds me of the parasocial relationships author Amanda Montell detailed in The Age of Magical Overthinking — definitely something for us all to keep in mind.

She also called out how easy it is for the media to warp the public's perception of the truth. "The 'truth' in the tabloids is hardly ever what you think," she added before eventually expressing how "proud" she is that her sister "didn't allow herself to be silenced in the face of adversity and lies."

Bart Johnson, Blake Lively's Brother-in-law

According to Page Six, Blake's brother-in-law Bart Johnson didn't hesitate to share his thoughts about the behavior of Baldoni and his team. He reportedly wrote, "Her complaints were filed during the filming. On record. Long before the public conflict. The cast unfollowed him [Baldoni] for a reason." in the comment section of the NYT Instagram post about the lengthy deep dive into what happened.

He continued by writing, "His PR team was stellar. Gross and disgusting but highly effective. Read the article, their text message exchanges and his PR campaign strategy to bury her by any means necessary. No one is with out [sic] faults. But the public got played."

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