Upgrade Your Sneakers for Summer With This Easy Hack

4th of July = BBQs, booze and flags, flags, flags! In our eyes, 4th of July kicks off summer, and we can’t wait! Step up your 4th of July style with some red, white and blue patterned sneakers. We went for the all-American brand Converse to wear and rock all summer long, but if you only plan to wear your sneaks for one day, head over to H&M for some cheaper canvas sneaks.

Materials + Tools:

– white canvas sneakers

– red and blue paint pens

– pencil

– paper

– ruler

Instructions:

1. Sketch out your patriotic design on a piece of paper to avoid making mistakes on the sneaks.

2. Create 1/2-inch lines along the shoe to provide a grid for your pattern.

3. Grab your paint pens and color away!

Practice makes perfect! Or in this case, it makes for a kickass pair of shoes. We recommend drawing your pattern on paper before putting your pen to the sneakers. This will allow you to develop your idea.

Tribal Sneaker

Unlace your shoes — it will be a whole lot easier to color on them without the laces. Pro tip: Color your laces too! Or replace them with fun colorful ribbon.

Create vertical lines every 1/2 inch on the shoe to provide a grid for your pattern. This is extremely helpful in creating the same proportional pattern on both shoes. Our first piece was an arrow-shaped line — we decided it would take up a 1/2 inch section.

Our next chunk took up four sections of our grid. After the arrow-shaped line, we created a straight line followed by a dotted line. Next we created a tribal-like shape that was designed using rectangles and triangles. Then we filled in the surrounding area of the shape with the opposite color.

We finished up the pattern with some more straight, dotted and arrow-shaped lines. On to the next one!

Use an eraser to clean up all of the unwanted pencil marks, then lace those babies back up to wear!

These shoes are clearly not just for The 4th of July. You can definitely wear these all summer long!

Create a grid of horizontal lines that are 1/2 inch apart. Color every other one in red to create the stripes of the flag.

American Flag Sneaker

Now for the stars! Draw your own star or print one out here to use as a stencil for your design. Trace them on your shoe, leaving the same amount of space between each star, and then color in the background.

flag shorts

flag sunnies?

Time to party! What is your favorite 4th of July tradition? Share with us below!

Nike isn't a leading name in the sneaker world – if not the leading name – for nothing. From basketball and track shoes to more fashion-forward styles, Nike sneakers are undeniably recognizable, no matter how you wear 'em. If you're searching for your next staple shoe, I've rounded up only the most iconic Nike sneakers for you here. You may recognize all-star silhouettes like the Air Force 1's and Cortezes, but I threw in a few lesser-known (yet still so cute) picks to inspire your next purchase. Scroll on for my favorites!

Nike

Nike Cortez Leather

These leather Nike sneakers have been in the game for decades – and for good reason. Though they're shoppable in a classic black + white colorway, I think this red + blue iteration has just enough color and flair without totally distracting your outfit. They're undeniably vintage-y, yet perfectly modern to match every ensemble you put together. What's more is these are as easy to wear as they are to style, thanks to the comfy foam midsole and thick wedge heel.

Nike

Nike Air Max SC

The mixed materials on these shoes are influenced by their practical track and field origins, but they've taken on more of a sporty streetwear vibe over the years, which I love. I've had friends throughout the years that won't go anywhere without these Nike sneakers. They're a great match with with jeans and sweatpants alike, and seamlessly go with any color palette you're working with, since they're just drenched in neutrals.

Nike

Nike SB Zoom Blazer Low Pro GT

Since low-profile sneakers are undoubtedly having a moment right now (everyone say "thank you" to the Adidas Sambas and Puma Easy Riders), these skater shoes are going to instantly make you look right on trend. If you want to make an even bigger "It" girl move wearing them, swap out the plain white laces for colorful ones, or even mix and match between the left and right shoes!

Nike

Nike Spark

These "thoughtfully crafted" sneaks are not quite for the streetwear fiends out there, but those who embrace being active every single day. Just by the structured look of them, you can see that they're geared specifically toward higher-impact movements, like walking long distances (and running even farther). Their feel on the feet is equal parts cushy and bouncy – literally putting some pep in your step.

Nike

Nike Air Force 1 '07 LX

These sneakers take the Air Force 1 – Nike's most classic basketball sneaker – and turn it on its head, while still retaining all the details that make the AF1's, well, the AF1's. You'll spot the timeless thick soles, signature side swoops, and breathable mesh paneling across the toe boxes, except this version is swarmed in chic, cream-colored suede and features a fun royal blue accent at the heels that definitely set them apart from the original (and at this point, tired) all-white colorway.

Nike

Nike Waffle Debut Vintage

Directly influenced by the shoe styles of the '70s, Nike slapped some soft suede on these sneakers along with a vibrant orange color that feels extremely indicative of the disco decade. Though they look like they're from another time period, they're a perfect fit for today's trends – pair 'em with a sleek matching set or baggy jeans for a sporty boost.

Nike

Nike Air Force 1 '07 Next Nature

These all-white shoes are uber-reliable for those moments you don't exactly know what shoes to reach for. Not only do they match with practically any 'fit, they feel super comfortable and virtually never wear out, as long as you take good care of them. You'll earn some serious street cred wearing them, too. They're that iconic.

Nike

Nike Tech Hera

The wavy design along the sides of these sneakers combined with the skinny laces up top makes for a playful visual effect that instantly amps up any get-up you've got goin' on, even if it's just jeans and a white tee. They almost have a Y2K feel to them, with an added height boost from the chunky soles. I need these on my feet ASAP.

Nike

Nike Blazer Mid '77

These high-rise sneaks have been hot since the '70s, beloved through the '80s and '90s, and perfectly revamped for the 2000's and beyond. They are still stamped with the vintage logo on the tongue, and massive swooshes on the sides for recognizable brand appeal.

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There are so many items cluttering up our homes and lives, and if we're honest, sometimes asking for physical gifts feels like an unnecessary weight to add to the holiday season. All we really need this year is time with the people that our closest to us, and maybe the opportunity to experience something new.

If you're looking for out-of-the-ordinary gift ideas for your friends and family, look no further than these experience gifts. From one-of-a-kind adventures to super easy ideas that will fit into any budget, these experience gifts are sure to make anyone smile.

Experience gift ideas you haven't thought of for 2024:

Brit + Co

Take Them Ice Skating

Ice skating simply makes winter more magical. It also gives us a chance to live out our Ice Princess dreams – but that's beside the point. Even if you don't live somewhere that has an iconic rink like New York City's Rockefeller Center, you can still make it a whole evening with hot chocolate and cozy sweaters.

Buy Them Concert Tickets

Take your best friend or S.O. to their favorite artist's concert for an unforgettable evening. Not only do you get to hear some awesome music, but concerts are always an excuse to get dressed up in a crazy outfit and dance like no one is watching.

Blue Ox Studio

Visit An Aquarium

Something about walking around and looking at animals under the sea makes us feel extra calm, and is great for anyone who wanted to be a mermaid as a kid. Our favorites? Otters, beluga whales, and turtles, but we love regular old fish tanks, too. This is a great way to get a taste of summer while it's dang cold outside!

Give Them A B+C Classes Subscription

If your giftee loves to learn, then they'll get a kick out of a subscription to our online classes. There's something for every stage of life, with classes like painting and freelancing to learning how to combat imposter syndrome.

PNW Production

Go Hiking Together

This is one experience gift that is super easy and super affordable to pull off. You can hike in every state in the country (granted, your hikes might look different in the mountains than in a coastal town), plus you can pack a picnic of their favorite foods or grab takeout from their favorite local restaurant.

Pack A Beautiful Picnic

Speaking of picnics, they're on our list of favorite date ideas *and* an ideal way to spend any day. You can hire a picnic service (like this one for NY) to set up your table before you get there, but you can also go all-out yourself by packing a basket with their favorite foods, drinks, books, and flowers. If it's too cold (or it's pouring out!), set up your picnic indoors among some candles and a nostalgic movie.

Philipp

Book Some Travel

Travel is an experience gift that will rarely disappoint, especially if you're going to a dream destination. There are so many locations all over the world — big cities like London, historical homes like Biltmore, and even filming locations from your favorite TV shows and movies — this is always a good idea. You can also book AirBnB experiences of all kinds for wherever you choose to stay.

Gift A Language Class

With programs like Duolingo and Rosetta Stone, gaining access to other languages is easier than ever right now. It's never too late to pick up something new, whether or not you're living your Emily in Paris dreams. Bon voyage!

Don Hainzl

Ride A Hot Air Balloon

See the world from a totally new perspective by going up in a hot air balloon. You can take them at different times of day depending on the view that your giftee loves the most (we're always up for a sunrise adventure), and you can even book one that comes with wine.

Host A Photoshoot

This experience gift idea is totally up to interpretation. Whether your best friend or S.O. wants to be a model for a day with fun props and outfits, or your mom has been asking for a family photoshoot for the last few years, this is the perfect opportunity to gift a photoshoot! You can also turn this experience gift idea on its head and gift your family and friends a photography classthey can do from their home.

Pixabay

Bookstore

If your sibling, best friend, or S.O. loves books, take them to their favorite bookstore, buy them a coffee, and let them peruse the shelves for one (or more!) books that they want to get their hands on. This is a super simple idea that will certainly make them smile.

Cooking Class

If you've never taken a cooking or baking class before, then it's definitely time to add that to your list. Not only is it a fun activity that also rewards you with food, but it makes for a great experience gift, especially for recipients who love spending time in the kitchen.

SHVETS production

Dinner + Sailing

Rent your own sailing cruise for the evening to get a dining experience that's unlike any other. Eat dinner at sunset or wait until mid-morning for an extra-fun brunch. In addition to a gift idea, this also makes a great date idea. That's a win-win in our book.

Museum

Take your giftee to their favorite museum, and spend an entire day looking at their favorite paintings and sculptures, or reading up on scientific discoveries. This is one gift idea that's great for all ages, and since there are so many different museums across the country, you can have a different experience every time.

Photo By: Kaboompics.com

A Spa Day

As much as we love doing our own spa day at home, there's no denying that having someone take care of the self-care is really nice from time to time. If gifting a professional massage or facial is in your gift giving budget, just go for it. The relaxation will be well worth it, and your recipient will be thanking you for eternity.From personal experience, we definitely recommend gifting a massage from Hand & Stone, and a facial from Heyday

Escape Room

We're big fans of escape rooms, and we're convinced they're fun for anyone who wants to be a spy for an afternoon. It's great for a couple of people or for a whole group of friends, so you can get all your favorite people in on it. Plus not only is it fun, but having a time limit to solve a problem teach you about your communication styles very quickly.

Antoni Shkraba

Wine Tastings + Vineyard Tours

Take the wine lovers in your life to a nearby vineyard to experience the wine up close and personal with a wine tour. This is a great way to try multiple wines so you can figure out which one is your favorite.

Learn To Fly

Great for adrenaline junkies and adventure seekers, this experience gift idea takes you right up into the air. Learn to fly a plane or a helicopter over landscapes that you don't usually get to see from the air.

Let us know which experience gifts you'll be giving this year on Twitter and check out our email newsletter for more ideas.

This post has been updated with additional reporting by Meredith Holser.

Whether the kiddo in your life needs new back to school swag or you're getting a jump on this year's holiday shopping, New Balance is the place to look! From stylish sneakers to comfy clothes, they've definitely got something your little one will love. We're happy to share an exclusive discount code you can use at checkout to save some $ on your next spree: use code BRITCO15 for 15% of kids' products plus free shipping!

We've sifted through the New Balance kids section for the coolest picks that'll ensure your kid looks and feels their best – here are our favorites!

Kids' Shoes

New Balance

2002 Sneaker

These athletic sneaks are designed to provide "essential cushioning" and shock absorption with ample support around the durable midsole and outsole. They're perfect for the kiddo that can't stay away from the playground since they stay on securely with a lace-up closure. Available in toddler & babies, little kid, and big kid sizes.

New Balance

9060 Sneaker

These stylish shoes are equally supportive and soft, all while boasting some eye-catching, tech-inspired details. Available in toddler & babies, little kid, and big kid sizes.

New Balance

480 Sneaker

For a more fashion-forward look, the 480's basketball-inspired silhouette can work on and off the court. The rubber outsole is impressively durable, providing a good amount of traction in every step. Available in little kid and big kid sizes.

New Balance

530 Sneaker

The New Balance 530s are truly iconic. The 2000's design is made to absorb any sort of impact through a combination of cushioning and compression resistance that runs throughout the entire shoe, so your kiddo will definitely feel comfortable wearing them as an everyday style! Available in toddler & babies, little kid, and big kid sizes.

New Balance

574 Sneaker

This "reliable" sneaker takes on road and trail shoe details in the lightweight EVA foam midsole cushioning and mesh paneling up top for added breathability. They currently come in 4 other colorways to suit your kiddo's personal style! Available in toddler & babies, little kid, and big kid sizes.

New Balance

990V6 Hook & Loop Sneaker

Designed for toddlers & babies as well as little kids, these velcro-able sneakers provide a nice and easy on-and-off option for busy bees. The leather upper has reflective details for an unmissable look, plus the shoe is appropriately padded throughout for unmatched comfort.

New Balance

327 New-B Hook & Loop Sneaker

These lil' sneakers boast a "generous" toe box and instep that's designed specifically to support any first-walker's needs. The outer layers are durable, so they'll stand up nicely to daily wear. Available in toddler & babies, little kid, and big kid sizes.

Kids' Clothing

New Balance

BB Global Crew

This 80% cotton and 20% polyester crewneck pullover is fitted with a brushed-back fleece material for a "soft and cozy feel." It makes the perfect fall and winter layer for your kiddo to bring to school on chilly days!

New Balance

CDL Floral Shoe Graphic T-Shirt

We want this adorable graphic tee for ourselves! The bold pink and yellow design will give your little one's look some serious street cred, since it features the iconic New Balance logo. Wears well with any NB sneaker!

New Balance

Brush Back Circle Floral Graphic Crew

This girly crewneck is also designed with a super-soft brushed-back fleece to keep 'em undeniably comfy and cozy.

New Balance

French Terry Small Logo Short

These soft shorts designed with an adjustable drawstring and side pockets are the ultimate school day uniform!

New Balance

Queue Tee

Another stylish graphic tee option, this pick available in kids' sizes XS-XL pairs seamlessly with anything from jeans to gym shorts.

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Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

Did you know how common eczema really is? According to the National Eczema Association, "more than 31 million people" are living with this condition — including everyone in my household. If you've been dealing with flare-ups since childhood, you know how irksome it can be to find products that avoid flagging down our body's internal inflammation guide. Anything from extreme temperatures to itchy fabric can make our bodies say, "Attack the part of the body that's in contact with the intruder!" It can be something super small that turns into a fiasco, but we're not condemned to suffer forever.

I've been using the best body wash for eczema all yearDove's Soothing Relief Body Wash — and I can't wait to dish about it! But, I thought it would be helpful to learn more about the condition and why certain things make it go haywire. Board-certified dermatologists Dr. Heather Woolery-Lloyd and Dr. Kristina Collins were kind enough to share informative answers about eczema, including what they think you should be using if you're tired of not knowing what to use!

  • Dr. Woolery-Lloyd is an internationally recognized dermatology and wellness expert who serves as Director of the Skin of Color Division for the University of Miami Department of Dermatology.
  • Dr. Collins specializes in Mohs micrographic surgery, as well as surgical and cosmetic surgery, having earning her M.D. as valedictorian from Vanderbilt University.

Check out the best body wash for eczema here:

  1. Dove Soothing Relief Body Wash
  2. Vanicream Gentle Body Wash
  3. Aveeno Skin Relief Body Wash
  4. Cetaphil Pro Dry Skin Soothing Wash
  5. CeraVe Soothing Body Wash
  6. Naturium The Glow Getter Multi-Oil Body Wash
  7. Kopari Hydrating Body Wash

The Best Body Wash For Eczema-Prone Skin

Target

This fragrance-free body wash stays in my shower not only because it's doesn't have pesky (and irritating) perfumes, but it's also super soothing. I feel like I'm at a spa each time I use it, and I've definitely noticed my skin isn't dry when I get out of the shower. It has a 5% nourishing serum in it along with colloidal oatmeal and was co-created by dermatologists who get it. The best part is that it not only does my skin look better, but I haven't experienced much body acne with it either. Plus, Amazon's customers less likely to return it!

Prior to using this, I was an avid Bath & Body Works body wash user. Before you throw tomatoes at me, I didn't know how much they were affecting my skin until I started doing more research in college. Once I learned better, I stopped using them and haven't looked back.

Another alternative to this is something Dr. Woolery-Lloyd suggests using — Dove's Sensitive Skin Body Wash. I used to use it prior to falling in love with Soothing Relief formula because it's hypoallergenic and equally moisturizing. It's just a little creamier!

Customer Reviews For Dove's Soothing Relief Body Wash

Target

Some of the top reviews on Amazon for this body wash are:

  • "I absolutely love this wonderful, silky, smooth, make you feel so sexy type of body wash! I have eczema & to find a body wash that works for me is saying A LOT! For having sensitive skin, I love how this is fragrance free, my skin is smooth & soft, not dry or dried out, not itchy, & great for after shaving, no razor bumps or redness!"
  • "This seems to have really improved my skin. It's great for sensitive skin."
  • "This has NO SCENT. Not even a weird “unscented” scent- you other itchy folk know what I’m talking about.
    Creamy but lathers like a dream and you only need like two pumps! Rinses off easily. Skin doesn’t feel dry or tight or… itchy! Like, at all! I will be ordering this over and over!"
  • "I have uber sensitive skin and have to be very careful in which products I use. This product feels really nice on my skin and has a positive, moisturizing and calming effect. I would highly recommend."

Shop The Best Body Wash For Eczema

Amazon

Dove Soothing Relief Body Wash

Other Great Body Washes For Eczema:

Amazon

Vanicream Gentle Body Wash

Dr. Woolery-Lloyd and Dr. Collins both recommend this body wash for those who have eczema: "It's free of dyes, fragrance, lanolin, and other common irritants.This product helps maintain moisture and reduce irritation, making it suitable for regular use," says Dr. Collins.

Amazon

Aveeno Skin Relief Body Wash

Dr. Collins loves Aveeno's Skin Relief Body Wash because it "contains colloidal oatmeal, which is soothing and helps relieve itching."

Amazon

Cetaphil Pro Dry Skin Soothing Wash

"It's soap-free, fragrance-free, and designed for sensitive skin," says Dr. Collins.

More Eczema-Friendly Body Wash Recommendations

Amazon

CeraVe Soothing Body Wash

This body wash has more of an oil consistency because of the Omega Oils found in it. They help to add moisture back to dry skin while Niacinamide helps soothe it if you've been experiencing irritation.

Amazon

Naturium The Glow Getter Multi-Oil Body Wash

This hydrating body wash may start off as an oil, but it quickly forms into a rich, moisturizing lather that we love. Although it's not specifically designed for eczema-prone skin, but the good news is that it works for everyone. It has over 50% glycerin and phyto lipids in to help "maintain healthy skin barrier and acid mantle" so you'll enjoy something luxurious for only $16!

Amazon

Kopari Hydrating Body Wash

This hydrating body wash has moisturizing coconut water and sea kelp in it, making it the vegan option you'll be glad you tried. It also has aloe vera juice in it which helps maintain the skin's collagen.

What is eczema?

Kaboompics.com

Eczema isn't necessarily a secret, but not everyone knows how it's actually defined or characterized. Both Dr. Woolery-Lloyd and Dr. Collins agree that eczema is also referred to as atopic dermatitis. Dr. Collins says, "It's a chronic skin condition characterized by inflamed, itchy, and often red or discolored patches on the skin. It can affect people of all ages but is commonly seen in children." The Asthma & Allergy Network reports "15-20% of children globally" have it which seems to coincide with the CDC discovering "nearly 1 in 5 children have a seasonal allergy." Dr. Woolery-Lloyd adds, "It tends to run in families." This makes sense because my mom had eczema, passed it on to me, and now my son has it!

She also says, "People with mild eczema may experience persistent dryness and itchiness, while more severe cases can lead to painful, cracked, and even bleeding skin." While it's not central to one location, Dr. Woolery-Lloyd says eczema commonly shows up "inside of the elbows, behind the knees, and the face."

Some cases of eczema differs from others, but it can become severe. The reason it exists in the body is because of "a dysfunction in the skin barrier" that leads to "an increased loss of moisture and heightened sensitivity to external irritants, allergens, and microbes," Dr. Collins expounds.

What triggers eczema flare-ups?

Keira Burton

I briefly mentioned some things that can trigger eczema flare-ups, but they're not all encompassing. Dr. Collins says, "Eczema flare-ups can be triggered by several factors, including environmental irritants (like certain fabrics, soaps, and fragrances), allergens (such as dust mites, pet dander, and pollen), stress, dry or cold weather, and even certain foods in some individuals."

If your dermatologist suspects you may be allergic to something you're eating, they may want you to take an allergy test. This is how I found out I was allergic to a ton of environmental factors, cats, and dogs! But why does this happen, you ask? "The skin’s barrier function is compromised in eczema-prone individuals, making it more reactive to these external and internal triggers," says Dr. Collins. So, it's rarely your fault when your skin gets triggered!

Dr. Woolery-Lloyd also says "emotional stress can exacerbate eczema symptoms" as well! This is usually my first sign that I'm super stressed or heading towards burnout!

How can someone with eczema care for their skin during cooler months?

Kaboompics.com

My son has been seeing a dermatologist for the past couple of months, and she's made it clear that he needs to not only avoid certain factors (fragrances, itchy fabrics, etc), but she also let us know his skin actually requires we add other elements to his routine, too. Both Dr. Collins and Dr. Woolery-Lloyd want you to stay as moisturized as possible.

Dr. Collins says, "During cooler months, it’s essential to focus on hydrating and protecting the skin barrier." Her tips are to"

  • Moisturize regularly with rich, fragrance-free creams or ointments.
  • Use a humidifier indoors to combat dry air.
  • Take lukewarm showers and avoid hot water, which can further dry out the skin.
  • Wear soft, breathable fabrics to avoid irritation, especially when layering.
  • Avoid long showers, as prolonged exposure to water can dehydrate the skin.
Dr. Woolery-Lloyd echoes her sentiments. "In the winter, people with eczema should consider switching to a more hydrating moisturizer to combat dry winter skin and prevent an eczema flare. Reapplication of the moisturizer is also important. This is especially important for the hands since taking gloves on and off on windy winter days can cause the hands to be especially vulnerable to dryness and eczema."
In other words, keep your moisturizer handy because you never know when you'll need to reapply it throughout the day!

Which products and ingredients should people with eczema avoid?

Bruno Cervera

Over the years, I've learned that anything that has artificial fragrances in them tends to trigger itchy and splotchy hives. Sometimes they're tiny clusters, but they can look like welts if my skin is super irritated. Dr. Collins says, "Individuals with eczema should avoid products with harsh fragrances, alcohol, sulfates, and synthetic dyes, as these can irritate the skin further." Also, sodium lauryl suflate (SLS) is also good to avoid because it "can strip the skin of its natural oils, exacerbating dryness," explains Dr. Collins. Sadly, she feels you shouldn't use popular "exfoliating ingredients" like salicylic acid or retinoids because they "can be too harsh for sensitive, eczema-prone skin."

A list of other things Dr. Woolery-Lloyd wants you to avoid are:

  • Harsh surfactants - Harsh surfactants, such as sodium laureth sulfate (SLES), can strip the skin of its natural oils, leading to dryness and irritation.
  • Alcohol - Alcohol can be drying to the skin, which can worsen eczema.
  • Essential oils - Essential oils can be irritating to the skin and can trigger a flare-up of eczema.
  • Alpha hydroxy acids (AHAs) and Beta hydroxy acids (BHAs) - Acids in skincare can be irritating to eczema-prone skin.
  • Dyes - Dyes can sometimes irritate eczema-prone skin and can trigger a flare-up of eczema.

She encourages you to "read product labels carefully."

What are good eczema-friendly body washes?

Amazon

Knowing this, both Dr. Collins and Dr. Woolery-Lloyd want you to use a body wash that's going to cleanse your skin instead of hurting it. "For eczema-prone skin, it’s best to choose gentle, fragrance-free body washes that are formulated to support the skin barrier," says Dr. Collins.

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With the holidays now approaching almost eerily quickly, you might already be feeling slightly uneasy about the family stresses that are bound to be on your plate (along with delicious Christmas cookies, of course). Spending a lot of time face-to-face with family can dig up old arguments or squabbles that everyone may have forgotten during the rest of the year.

Learn the 8 best ways to support your friend while they're in the middle of family drama

You’re not the only one dealing with the drama, though, and while your own family issues might feel somewhat out of your control, there might be more you can do to take the edge off the stress that your friends are feeling in anticipation of holiday gatherings. Keep scrolling for eight expert tips for how to best offer support to your most stress-ridden BFFs.

1. Listen without judging if your friend reveals an ongoing argument about a family will

RDNE Stock project

Being a good listener is one of the most basic — and yet most important — things you can do as a friend 365 days of the year, but when tensions run high near the holidays, those listening skills become all the more crucial. You might even consider resisting the urge to speak, like, at all. “Be a good listener and don’t give advice,” licensed marriage and family therapist Katie Ziskind says. “Supporting someone doesn’t mean that you have to fix their problem. Instead, truly being supportive means giving a hug when someone is crying and being a caring friend.”

2. Prep your pal to expect drama if your uncle's invited his new girlfriend and ex to dinner

Rather than reassuring your friend that things at family celebrations may not be as bad as they fear, trust what they know about the situation and help them wrap their head around what’s to come. This should minimize the stress for them in the long run. “If you expect it and it happens, situation normal,” certified life coach Susan Golicic tells us. “If you expect it and it doesn’t, well, then, a bonus!”

3. Help your bestie make a plan in case their fight-or-flight mode gets triggered

Going into any situation with a plan almost always feels better than going in unprepared. Per writer, speaker, and healing expert Alisa Zipursky, a helpful plan might include specific check-in times, a code word that indicates your friend needs extra support, and ideas for creating healthy boundaries with family members who make them feel especially triggered. “The idea is to make asking for help as easy as possible,” Zipursky says. “Making sure a proactive plan is in place well before someone enters the stressful situation can help relieve some of the anticipatory anxiety.”

4. Check in often by sending your friend periodic texts 

Licensed counselor Maria Inoa recommends that you prioritize regular touch-base texts over the course of whatever event is causing your friend the most stress. It’s not about solving the conflicts or taking away their pain. Instead, you can focus on offering gentle reminders that you are thinking of them and are available if they need you.

5. Create a new tradition that revolves around you and and your bestie's favorite Christmas movies

If your friend’s family holiday celebrations don’t exactly inspire positive feelings about the occasion, why not help them establish some better associations? Licensed clinical professional counselor Anna Poss suggests planning a “low-stress, fun way to celebrate with each other before or after the actual holiday.” Get a seasonal movie night or cookie swap on the calendar before everyone leaves town to hang with family. Those cozy vibes may help dull the negative, anxious feelings.

6. Write down words of affirmations for them to look at

Photo By: Kaboompics.com

Grab some pretty stationery and put your love and support on paper for your BFF. “In the note, remind her how strong, courageous, and capable she is,” licensed psychotherapist and life coach Diane Petrella says. “Let her know how much you love and admire her and how grateful you are for her friendship. Write whatever you think your friend needs to hear to feel supported, grounded, and loved.” Remind her to hide the note in her pocket or bag so she can read it whenever she needs a little extra TLC over the course of the holidays. You can even go one step further and send them home with a care package, per therapistShannon Thomas.

7. Invite your friend to your family celebration

If things have gotten so bad with your bestie’s family that she wants to steer clear of their celebrations entirely, you may want to invite her to join you and your crew instead. Even if she opts to decline your invitation, it will mean a lot to her to know that she has choices. If your friend does take you up on the offer, Mountainside Treatment Center‘s family wellness manager Tina Muller recommends that you try to incorporate some of her favorite traditions into your holiday schedule.

8. Keep your phone nearby if your friend needs to talk about everything that happened

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“Before an event with possible family issues even happens, schedule a time not long after to see the friend,” marriage and family therapist Sarah Epstein suggests. “Now you’ve become the light at the end of the tunnel for them.” Be prepared to be a listening ear over dinner or a workout session so your pal can vent about everything that’s gone on and (hopefully) be ready to move on from there.

How do you and your pals support each other through the not-so-fun parts of the holidays? Tweet us @BritandCo.

(Photo via Getty)