When I was working barista shifts at Starbucks over the winter, we'd get Medicine Ball orders every single hour. And not going to lie, I really hated them. Let me get this straight — I didn't hate the drink, but I more so disliked the fact that the customers ordering them almost always demanded their tea between a swarm of thick coughs and countless small sniffles. Yuck.
It truly felt like I was on the fence of getting sick pretty much every time someone stepped up to the register. But, I remained strong and I did what I had to do as a service worker, which in this case, was to pour the peachy-citrus tea into a pool of honey syrup, then top it with steamed lemonade. Coughs and sniffles aside, I often questioned why someone would order the Medicine Ball, based on the cost of the drink alone (up to $6, and that gets expensive when you're ordering it all the time).
Popular during sick season, the Starbucks Medicine Ball (AKA the Honey Citrus Mint Tea) may be good, but it's not good enough to cure you of that semi-flu, or whatever other pathogens might have been floating around in my café. It's also not worth putting someone else's health in jeopardy. Turns out, you can make the Medicine Ball at home — which saves money and effort (and spares others' safety) in the long run.
Scroll on to find out how simple making the Starbucks Medicine Ball really is!
@k.ard Medicine Ball for only $1.69 each! #medicineball#fluseason#coldseason#starbucksdupe#budgettok#SephoraConcealers#DrPepperTuitionContest#halloween#fall2022♬ Halloween - KenZie DarkStar
TikTok always makes recipes look effortless. So, I took this trusty tutorial into our own hands to compare how good an at-home Medicine Ball could really be against the real one from Starbucks.
Ingredients for the Starbucks Medicine Ball Drink
Starbucks
How can I make a Medicine Ball at home?
Anna Pou / PEXELS
Making a Starbucks Medicine Ball at home is pretty straightforward:
- Heat 1 cup of lemonade in the microwave for 45 seconds to a minute.
- Add 1 cup of hot water and stir in 1 tablespoon honey.
- Add one bag of Peach Tranquility and one bag of Jade Citrus Mint, then steep for a few minutes.
- Enjoy your Medicine Ball!
How I Made The Starbucks Medicine Ball At Home
Meredith Holser
First, I embarked on an ever-iconic Target run to gather my copycat Starbucks Medicine Ball recipe ingredients. Since they were out of the exact Teavana teas I needed to replicate the TikTok recipe, I picked up two similar ones: first, the Good & Gather Organic Peach Honey Tea, and the Good & Gather Organic Mint Tea. I also picked up a jug of lemonade, and planned to use the honey I already had at home. All together, the three ingredients I needed ended up costing me about $9.50.
Step 1: Heat Lemonade
Tara Winstead / PEXELS
I measured a cup of lemonade, and just popped my Starbucks mug in the microwave for a minute.
Step 2: Add Water and Honey
Roman Odinstov / PEXELS
While the lemonade was in the microwave, I set some water on in my electric kettle. Once both liquids were heated up, I measured a cup of water and combined it in the mug with a tablespoon of honey. Yum!
Step 3: Steep Tea Bags
Anna Pou / PEXELS
Then, I put the two teabags in the mixture to steep. The tea wasn't overly hot either, and I steeped them for about 3 minutes before giving my homemade Medicine Ball recipe a lil' sip.
Is the homemade version of the Medicine Ball as good as the one from Starbucks?
Meredith Holser
To my surprise, my homemade Medicine Ball recipe was extremely delicious, and it mimicked the Starbucks one so closely. Before tasting, I gave my tea a sniff, and the smell was pretty much identical to the drink made in stores. The flavor hit the exact same mark.
Overall, I rate my homemade Starbucks Medicine Ball a 4.7/5.
The only detracting factors are the temperature of the drink – Starbucks steams their lemonade to make the drink super hot, and mine wasn't nearly as piping. Of course, this is just personal preference, and next time, I can heat the lemonade for a longer duration, or reheat the drink altogether. Another reason for the minimal point deduction is the drink wasn't as sweet as I expected it to be. Again, this is a personal preference, and you can add as little or as much sweetener you desire!
All of this goes to say, that a homemade Starbucks Medicine Ball is just as yummy as the one you can get at a Starbucks cafe. By following the steps above, you can make a copycat recipe that's going to satisfy your hankering for a citrusy, hot tea!
Looking for more at-home copycat recipes like this Medicine Ball from Starbucks? Browse our site for more DIYs!
Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.
This post has been updated.
There are so many items cluttering up our homes and lives, and if we're honest, sometimes asking for physical gifts feels like an unnecessary weight to add to the holiday season. All we really need this year is time with the people that our closest to us, and maybe the opportunity to experience something new.
If you're looking for out-of-the-ordinary gift ideas for your friends and family, look no further than these experience gifts. From one-of-a-kind adventures to super easy ideas that will fit into any budget, these experience gifts are sure to make anyone smile.
Experience gift ideas you haven't thought of for 2024:
Brit + Co
Take Them Ice Skating
Ice skating simply makes winter more magical. It also gives us a chance to live out our Ice Princess dreams – but that's beside the point. Even if you don't live somewhere that has an iconic rink like New York City's Rockefeller Center, you can still make it a whole evening with hot chocolate and cozy sweaters.
Buy Them Concert Tickets
Take your best friend or S.O. to their favorite artist's concert for an unforgettable evening. Not only do you get to hear some awesome music, but concerts are always an excuse to get dressed up in a crazy outfit and dance like no one is watching.
Visit An Aquarium
Something about walking around and looking at animals under the sea makes us feel extra calm, and is great for anyone who wanted to be a mermaid as a kid. Our favorites? Otters, beluga whales, and turtles, but we love regular old fish tanks, too. This is a great way to get a taste of summer while it's dang cold outside!
Give Them A B+C Classes Subscription
If your giftee loves to learn, then they'll get a kick out of a subscription to our online classes. There's something for every stage of life, with classes like painting and freelancing to learning how to combat imposter syndrome.
Go Hiking Together
This is one experience gift that is super easy and super affordable to pull off. You can hike in every state in the country (granted, your hikes might look different in the mountains than in a coastal town), plus you can pack a picnic of their favorite foods or grab takeout from their favorite local restaurant.
Pack A Beautiful Picnic
Speaking of picnics, they're on our list of favorite date ideas *and* an ideal way to spend any day. You can hire a picnic service (like this one for NY) to set up your table before you get there, but you can also go all-out yourself by packing a basket with their favorite foods, drinks, books, and flowers. If it's too cold (or it's pouring out!), set up your picnic indoors among some candles and a nostalgic movie.
Book Some Travel
Travel is an experience gift that will rarely disappoint, especially if you're going to a dream destination. There are so many locations all over the world — big cities like London, historical homes like Biltmore, and even filming locations from your favorite TV shows and movies — this is always a good idea. You can also book AirBnB experiences of all kinds for wherever you choose to stay.
Gift A Language Class
With programs like Duolingo and Rosetta Stone, gaining access to other languages is easier than ever right now. It's never too late to pick up something new, whether or not you're living your Emily in Paris dreams. Bon voyage!
Ride A Hot Air Balloon
See the world from a totally new perspective by going up in a hot air balloon. You can take them at different times of day depending on the view that your giftee loves the most (we're always up for a sunrise adventure), and you can even book one that comes with wine.
Host A Photoshoot
This experience gift idea is totally up to interpretation. Whether your best friend or S.O. wants to be a model for a day with fun props and outfits, or your mom has been asking for a family photoshoot for the last few years, this is the perfect opportunity to gift a photoshoot! You can also turn this experience gift idea on its head and gift your family and friends a photography classthey can do from their home.
Bookstore
If your sibling, best friend, or S.O. loves books, take them to their favorite bookstore, buy them a coffee, and let them peruse the shelves for one (or more!) books that they want to get their hands on. This is a super simple idea that will certainly make them smile.
Cooking Class
If you've never taken a cooking or baking class before, then it's definitely time to add that to your list. Not only is it a fun activity that also rewards you with food, but it makes for a great experience gift, especially for recipients who love spending time in the kitchen.
Dinner + Sailing
Rent your own sailing cruise for the evening to get a dining experience that's unlike any other. Eat dinner at sunset or wait until mid-morning for an extra-fun brunch. In addition to a gift idea, this also makes a great date idea. That's a win-win in our book.
Museum
Take your giftee to their favorite museum, and spend an entire day looking at their favorite paintings and sculptures, or reading up on scientific discoveries. This is one gift idea that's great for all ages, and since there are so many different museums across the country, you can have a different experience every time.
A Spa Day
As much as we love doing our own spa day at home, there's no denying that having someone take care of the self-care is really nice from time to time. If gifting a professional massage or facial is in your gift giving budget, just go for it. The relaxation will be well worth it, and your recipient will be thanking you for eternity.From personal experience, we definitely recommend gifting a massage from Hand & Stone, and a facial from HeydayEscape Room
We're big fans of escape rooms, and we're convinced they're fun for anyone who wants to be a spy for an afternoon. It's great for a couple of people or for a whole group of friends, so you can get all your favorite people in on it. Plus not only is it fun, but having a time limit to solve a problem teach you about your communication styles very quickly.
Wine Tastings + Vineyard Tours
Take the wine lovers in your life to a nearby vineyard to experience the wine up close and personal with a wine tour. This is a great way to try multiple wines so you can figure out which one is your favorite.
Learn To Fly
Great for adrenaline junkies and adventure seekers, this experience gift idea takes you right up into the air. Learn to fly a plane or a helicopter over landscapes that you don't usually get to see from the air.
Let us know which experience gifts you'll be giving this year on Twitter and check out our email newsletter for more ideas.
This post has been updated with additional reporting by Meredith Holser.
Christmas wreaths are great way to elevate your front door, entryway, or mantel during the holidays. From faux cedar and pine wrapped in velvet ribbon to a beautiful mix of dried fruit and flowers, these wreaths satisfy any holiday aesthetic and budget. To preserve your wreath outdoors, try to keep it away from direct sunlight and limit its exposure to rain, snow, whatever elements come your way. Prefer to make your own? Check out our pom pom, succulent, and holiday wreath DIYs you can make at a fraction of the cost.
Here are 20 wreaths you'll want to deck the halls, doors, mantel, and more this holiday season.
Real Touch Norfolk Pine Wreath with Velvet Bow and Bell
A simple velvet bow will elevate your door wreath for the season. This handmade and customizable faux Norfolk pine and juniper wreath is a very demure, very mindful way to decorate for the holidays, indoors and out.
Anthropologie Faux Cedar Wreath (optional trimmings)
Add velvet ribbon and ornaments to this faux and luxe cedar wreath and you have a colorful wreath for many years to come.
Crate and Barrel Faux Red Mini Berry Wreath
Available in holly berry red or winter white, this faux wreath brings holiday cheer to your door or mantel or even as wall art!
Food52 Vintage Bell Olive and Eucalyptus Wreath
Handmade in Monterey, CA, this stunning olive and eucalyptus wreath is very woodland vibes with two vintage bells strung with jute.
West Elm Faux Shimmer Wreath
Bring an instant glow to your holiday decor with this pre-lit wreath and matching garland.
Anthropologie Mistletoe Iron Wreath
For those who love kissing under the mistletoe, this wreath is the perfect holiday addition and tradition.
Maisonette Berry & Bright Ball Wreath
Go for vintage holiday party vibes with this cheeky glass wreath.
World Market Faux Eucalyptus and Red Berries Wreath
Deck your trad door with this lifelike eucalyptus wreath in two-tone green hues.
Afloral Real Touch Norfolk Pine Wreath
This super natural-looking pine wreath is faux and fabulous all year-round. Add small ornaments, ribbon, lights or just keep it au naturel.
William Sonoma Rainbow Kaleidoscope Live Wreath
Holiday wreath, but make it rainbow with air-dried botanicals like delphinium, larkspur, craspedia, strawflower, avena and eucalyptus. So fun!
DIY Holiday Wreath
Say hello to our embroidery hoop mixed with fringe, florals and wood. Take it a step further and add in succulents and some gold detailing to make it the cutest DIY Christmas wreath on the block. (via Brit + Co)
Etsy Large Beaded Natural Dried Wreath
This mix of boho botanicals on a lovely beaded wreath include: baby’s breath, banksia flowers, brunia stems, phylica, and flowers in green, red, yellow, and pink hues.
Anthropologie Paper Village Wreath
How cute are these colorful paper houses? Add a little village to your wreath this year for a whimsical look.
Etsy Boho Wreath
This boho-inspired pampas wreath is lush and beautiful and would look stunning on a dark-colored door.
DIY Pom Pom Wreath
Here's a wreath that's festive, colorful, and could be hung year-round. All it takes is some pom-pom skills (read: scissors) and a good Netflix binge to get you there. Get ready to bring pom-pom holiday decor to your home. (via Brit + Co)
ETSY DRIED FLOWER PAMPAS WREATH
Dried flowers combined with oats, wheat, pampas grass, and mixed cereals will turn your front door into an actual conversation piece.
Terrain Iron Constellation Wreath
This wreath is made up of a constellation of weathered iron stars for a little celestial vibe.
Cost Plus Mini Pinecone and Faux Greenery Wreath, Set of 2
Why go with just one big wreath when you can adorn your door with these sweet 6-inch wreaths with real pinecones, snowy faux pine sprigs and white eucalyptus leaves. Add them to doors, tablescapes or chair backs during your holiday feast.
Amazon Prime Snow-Covered Faux Spruce Wreath
With a mix of white berries, brown pine cones and festive stars, this "Welcome" wreath will cheer up your door instantly.
DIY Succulent Wreath
Here's a holiday wreath refresh, desert-style. It also makes a great handmade gift! (via Brit + Co)
Sign up for our newsletter to receive more creative home decor ideas, delivered right to your inbox and check out our creative DIY classes on B+C Classes!
Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.
Did you know how common eczema really is? According to the National Eczema Association, "more than 31 million people" are living with this condition — including everyone in my household. If you've been dealing with flare-ups since childhood, you know how irksome it can be to find products that avoid flagging down our body's internal inflammation guide. Anything from extreme temperatures to itchy fabric can make our bodies say, "Attack the part of the body that's in contact with the intruder!" It can be something super small that turns into a fiasco, but we're not condemned to suffer forever.
I've been using the best body wash for eczema all year — Dove's Soothing Relief Body Wash — and I can't wait to dish about it! But, I thought it would be helpful to learn more about the condition and why certain things make it go haywire. Board-certified dermatologists Dr. Heather Woolery-Lloyd and Dr. Kristina Collins were kind enough to share informative answers about eczema, including what they think you should be using if you're tired of not knowing what to use!
- Dr. Woolery-Lloyd is an internationally recognized dermatology and wellness expert who serves as Director of the Skin of Color Division for the University of Miami Department of Dermatology.
- Dr. Collins specializes in Mohs micrographic surgery, as well as surgical and cosmetic surgery, having earning her M.D. as valedictorian from Vanderbilt University.
Check out the best body wash for eczema here:
- Dove Soothing Relief Body Wash
- Vanicream Gentle Body Wash
- Aveeno Skin Relief Body Wash
- Cetaphil Pro Dry Skin Soothing Wash
- CeraVe Soothing Body Wash
- Naturium The Glow Getter Multi-Oil Body Wash
- Kopari Hydrating Body Wash
The Best Body Wash For Eczema-Prone Skin
Target
This fragrance-free body wash stays in my shower not only because it's doesn't have pesky (and irritating) perfumes, but it's also super soothing. I feel like I'm at a spa each time I use it, and I've definitely noticed my skin isn't dry when I get out of the shower. It has a 5% nourishing serum in it along with colloidal oatmeal and was co-created by dermatologists who get it. The best part is that it not only does my skin look better, but I haven't experienced much body acne with it either. Plus, Amazon's customers less likely to return it!
Prior to using this, I was an avid Bath & Body Works body wash user. Before you throw tomatoes at me, I didn't know how much they were affecting my skin until I started doing more research in college. Once I learned better, I stopped using them and haven't looked back.
Another alternative to this is something Dr. Woolery-Lloyd suggests using — Dove's Sensitive Skin Body Wash. I used to use it prior to falling in love with Soothing Relief formula because it's hypoallergenic and equally moisturizing. It's just a little creamier!
Customer Reviews For Dove's Soothing Relief Body Wash
Target
Some of the top reviews on Amazon for this body wash are:
- "I absolutely love this wonderful, silky, smooth, make you feel so sexy type of body wash! I have eczema & to find a body wash that works for me is saying A LOT! For having sensitive skin, I love how this is fragrance free, my skin is smooth & soft, not dry or dried out, not itchy, & great for after shaving, no razor bumps or redness!"
- "This seems to have really improved my skin. It's great for sensitive skin."
- "This has NO SCENT. Not even a weird “unscented” scent- you other itchy folk know what I’m talking about.
Creamy but lathers like a dream and you only need like two pumps! Rinses off easily. Skin doesn’t feel dry or tight or… itchy! Like, at all! I will be ordering this over and over!" - "I have uber sensitive skin and have to be very careful in which products I use. This product feels really nice on my skin and has a positive, moisturizing and calming effect. I would highly recommend."
Other Great Body Washes For Eczema:
Amazon
Vanicream Gentle Body Wash
Dr. Woolery-Lloyd and Dr. Collins both recommend this body wash for those who have eczema: "It's free of dyes, fragrance, lanolin, and other common irritants.This product helps maintain moisture and reduce irritation, making it suitable for regular use," says Dr. Collins.
Amazon
Aveeno Skin Relief Body Wash
Dr. Collins loves Aveeno's Skin Relief Body Wash because it "contains colloidal oatmeal, which is soothing and helps relieve itching."
Amazon
Cetaphil Pro Dry Skin Soothing Wash
"It's soap-free, fragrance-free, and designed for sensitive skin," says Dr. Collins.
More Eczema-Friendly Body Wash Recommendations
Amazon
CeraVe Soothing Body Wash
This body wash has more of an oil consistency because of the Omega Oils found in it. They help to add moisture back to dry skin while Niacinamide helps soothe it if you've been experiencing irritation.
Amazon
Naturium The Glow Getter Multi-Oil Body Wash
This hydrating body wash may start off as an oil, but it quickly forms into a rich, moisturizing lather that we love. Although it's not specifically designed for eczema-prone skin, but the good news is that it works for everyone. It has over 50% glycerin and phyto lipids in to help "maintain healthy skin barrier and acid mantle" so you'll enjoy something luxurious for only $16!
Amazon
Kopari Hydrating Body Wash
This hydrating body wash has moisturizing coconut water and sea kelp in it, making it the vegan option you'll be glad you tried. It also has aloe vera juice in it which helps maintain the skin's collagen.
What is eczema?
Eczema isn't necessarily a secret, but not everyone knows how it's actually defined or characterized. Both Dr. Woolery-Lloyd and Dr. Collins agree that eczema is also referred to as atopic dermatitis. Dr. Collins says, "It's a chronic skin condition characterized by inflamed, itchy, and often red or discolored patches on the skin. It can affect people of all ages but is commonly seen in children." The Asthma & Allergy Network reports "15-20% of children globally" have it which seems to coincide with the CDC discovering "nearly 1 in 5 children have a seasonal allergy." Dr. Woolery-Lloyd adds, "It tends to run in families." This makes sense because my mom had eczema, passed it on to me, and now my son has it!
She also says, "People with mild eczema may experience persistent dryness and itchiness, while more severe cases can lead to painful, cracked, and even bleeding skin." While it's not central to one location, Dr. Woolery-Lloyd says eczema commonly shows up "inside of the elbows, behind the knees, and the face."
Some cases of eczema differs from others, but it can become severe. The reason it exists in the body is because of "a dysfunction in the skin barrier" that leads to "an increased loss of moisture and heightened sensitivity to external irritants, allergens, and microbes," Dr. Collins expounds.
What triggers eczema flare-ups?
I briefly mentioned some things that can trigger eczema flare-ups, but they're not all encompassing. Dr. Collins says, "Eczema flare-ups can be triggered by several factors, including environmental irritants (like certain fabrics, soaps, and fragrances), allergens (such as dust mites, pet dander, and pollen), stress, dry or cold weather, and even certain foods in some individuals."
If your dermatologist suspects you may be allergic to something you're eating, they may want you to take an allergy test. This is how I found out I was allergic to a ton of environmental factors, cats, and dogs! But why does this happen, you ask? "The skin’s barrier function is compromised in eczema-prone individuals, making it more reactive to these external and internal triggers," says Dr. Collins. So, it's rarely your fault when your skin gets triggered!
Dr. Woolery-Lloyd also says "emotional stress can exacerbate eczema symptoms" as well! This is usually my first sign that I'm super stressed or heading towards burnout!
How can someone with eczema care for their skin during cooler months?
My son has been seeing a dermatologist for the past couple of months, and she's made it clear that he needs to not only avoid certain factors (fragrances, itchy fabrics, etc), but she also let us know his skin actually requires we add other elements to his routine, too. Both Dr. Collins and Dr. Woolery-Lloyd want you to stay as moisturized as possible.
Dr. Collins says, "During cooler months, it’s essential to focus on hydrating and protecting the skin barrier." Her tips are to"
- Moisturize regularly with rich, fragrance-free creams or ointments.
- Use a humidifier indoors to combat dry air.
- Take lukewarm showers and avoid hot water, which can further dry out the skin.
- Wear soft, breathable fabrics to avoid irritation, especially when layering.
- Avoid long showers, as prolonged exposure to water can dehydrate the skin.
Dr. Woolery-Lloyd echoes her sentiments. "In the winter, people with eczema should consider switching to a more hydrating moisturizer to combat dry winter skin and prevent an eczema flare. Reapplication of the moisturizer is also important. This is especially important for the hands since taking gloves on and off on windy winter days can cause the hands to be especially vulnerable to dryness and eczema."
In other words, keep your moisturizer handy because you never know when you'll need to reapply it throughout the day!
Which products and ingredients should people with eczema avoid?
Over the years, I've learned that anything that has artificial fragrances in them tends to trigger itchy and splotchy hives. Sometimes they're tiny clusters, but they can look like welts if my skin is super irritated. Dr. Collins says, "Individuals with eczema should avoid products with harsh fragrances, alcohol, sulfates, and synthetic dyes, as these can irritate the skin further." Also, sodium lauryl suflate (SLS) is also good to avoid because it "can strip the skin of its natural oils, exacerbating dryness," explains Dr. Collins. Sadly, she feels you shouldn't use popular "exfoliating ingredients" like salicylic acid or retinoids because they "can be too harsh for sensitive, eczema-prone skin."
A list of other things Dr. Woolery-Lloyd wants you to avoid are:
- Harsh surfactants - Harsh surfactants, such as sodium laureth sulfate (SLES), can strip the skin of its natural oils, leading to dryness and irritation.
- Alcohol - Alcohol can be drying to the skin, which can worsen eczema.
- Essential oils - Essential oils can be irritating to the skin and can trigger a flare-up of eczema.
- Alpha hydroxy acids (AHAs) and Beta hydroxy acids (BHAs) - Acids in skincare can be irritating to eczema-prone skin.
- Dyes - Dyes can sometimes irritate eczema-prone skin and can trigger a flare-up of eczema.
She encourages you to "read product labels carefully."
What are good eczema-friendly body washes?
Amazon
Knowing this, both Dr. Collins and Dr. Woolery-Lloyd want you to use a body wash that's going to cleanse your skin instead of hurting it. "For eczema-prone skin, it’s best to choose gentle, fragrance-free body washes that are formulated to support the skin barrier," says Dr. Collins.
Follow our Amazon Storefront for more beauty products we love!
Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.
With the holidays now approaching almost eerily quickly, you might already be feeling slightly uneasy about the family stresses that are bound to be on your plate (along with delicious Christmas cookies, of course). Spending a lot of time face-to-face with family can dig up old arguments or squabbles that everyone may have forgotten during the rest of the year.
Learn the 8 best ways to support your friend while they're in the middle of family drama
You’re not the only one dealing with the drama, though, and while your own family issues might feel somewhat out of your control, there might be more you can do to take the edge off the stress that your friends are feeling in anticipation of holiday gatherings. Keep scrolling for eight expert tips for how to best offer support to your most stress-ridden BFFs.
1. Listen without judging if your friend reveals an ongoing argument about a family will
Being a good listener is one of the most basic — and yet most important — things you can do as a friend 365 days of the year, but when tensions run high near the holidays, those listening skills become all the more crucial. You might even consider resisting the urge to speak, like, at all. “Be a good listener and don’t give advice,” licensed marriage and family therapist Katie Ziskind says. “Supporting someone doesn’t mean that you have to fix their problem. Instead, truly being supportive means giving a hug when someone is crying and being a caring friend.”
2. Prep your pal to expect drama if your uncle's invited his new girlfriend and ex to dinner
Rather than reassuring your friend that things at family celebrations may not be as bad as they fear, trust what they know about the situation and help them wrap their head around what’s to come. This should minimize the stress for them in the long run. “If you expect it and it happens, situation normal,” certified life coach Susan Golicic tells us. “If you expect it and it doesn’t, well, then, a bonus!”
3. Help your bestie make a plan in case their fight-or-flight mode gets triggered
Going into any situation with a plan almost always feels better than going in unprepared. Per writer, speaker, and healing expert Alisa Zipursky, a helpful plan might include specific check-in times, a code word that indicates your friend needs extra support, and ideas for creating healthy boundaries with family members who make them feel especially triggered. “The idea is to make asking for help as easy as possible,” Zipursky says. “Making sure a proactive plan is in place well before someone enters the stressful situation can help relieve some of the anticipatory anxiety.”
4. Check in often by sending your friend periodic texts
Licensed counselor Maria Inoa recommends that you prioritize regular touch-base texts over the course of whatever event is causing your friend the most stress. It’s not about solving the conflicts or taking away their pain. Instead, you can focus on offering gentle reminders that you are thinking of them and are available if they need you.
5. Create a new tradition that revolves around you and and your bestie's favorite Christmas movies
If your friend’s family holiday celebrations don’t exactly inspire positive feelings about the occasion, why not help them establish some better associations? Licensed clinical professional counselor Anna Poss suggests planning a “low-stress, fun way to celebrate with each other before or after the actual holiday.” Get a seasonal movie night or cookie swap on the calendar before everyone leaves town to hang with family. Those cozy vibes may help dull the negative, anxious feelings.
6. Write down words of affirmations for them to look at
Grab some pretty stationery and put your love and support on paper for your BFF. “In the note, remind her how strong, courageous, and capable she is,” licensed psychotherapist and life coach Diane Petrella says. “Let her know how much you love and admire her and how grateful you are for her friendship. Write whatever you think your friend needs to hear to feel supported, grounded, and loved.” Remind her to hide the note in her pocket or bag so she can read it whenever she needs a little extra TLC over the course of the holidays. You can even go one step further and send them home with a care package, per therapistShannon Thomas.
7. Invite your friend to your family celebration
If things have gotten so bad with your bestie’s family that she wants to steer clear of their celebrations entirely, you may want to invite her to join you and your crew instead. Even if she opts to decline your invitation, it will mean a lot to her to know that she has choices. If your friend does take you up on the offer, Mountainside Treatment Center‘s family wellness manager Tina Muller recommends that you try to incorporate some of her favorite traditions into your holiday schedule.
8. Keep your phone nearby if your friend needs to talk about everything that happened
“Before an event with possible family issues even happens, schedule a time not long after to see the friend,” marriage and family therapist Sarah Epstein suggests. “Now you’ve become the light at the end of the tunnel for them.” Be prepared to be a listening ear over dinner or a workout session so your pal can vent about everything that’s gone on and (hopefully) be ready to move on from there.
How do you and your pals support each other through the not-so-fun parts of the holidays? Tweet us @BritandCo.
(Photo via Getty)