With the New Year just around the corner, many of us are undoubtably thinking about what kinds of changes we want to manifest in our lives next year. Perhaps we want to stop a bad habit — maybe we're planning to drink less alcohol, work out more, or get a promotion.
As a society, it's getting less and less trendy to be harsh on ourselves around New Year's resolutions. Instead, we're starting to embrace the idea of change from a place of compassion. Instead of wanting to alter our body shape, for example, maybe we just want to start new hobbies that make our bodies stronger and healthier.
Whatever your goals might be this year, it can be scary to embark upon the process of change. Fear of failure can hold us back from ever starting, We spoke with an energy expert Dana Lord Lewis, Founder of Energy Think, about New Year's resolutions, making lasting change, and how to realign your energy so that you're more likely to manifest your goals.
Why do most New Year's Resolutions fail?
Dana: Most resolutions fail because of lack of energy.
It’s not that people don’t have enough energy to get things done, but the amount of energy that they get from NOT doing what they intend to outweighs the energy they get from DOING what they intend to, and this throws them back into old habits.
Any situation in our lives is there for a reason – it is playing some role and its presence giving us some form of energy. When we want to make change its because that particular way of getting energy isn’t enjoyable, sustainable, or doesn’t provide an overall energy enhancement, but actually loses us energy in the long term.
If an energy income stream gets stopped, even one that might not be healthy, this feels very uncomfortable to our systems. If we are just starting to make the change and are still in “investment mode” (i.e. going to the gym, spending energy working out but not yet seeing results and getting the payback) then it can be overwhelmingly uncomfortable.
This is when we see relaxing out of the discomfort and back into the established ways of intaking and spending energy.
How do energetics work when it comes to achieving our goals?
Dana: All goals are endpoints that require energetic investment to arrive at.
I am not speaking exclusively about physical energy – such as the ‘doing’ of a thing. I am also talking about non-physical energy which is directed largely through mental and emotional experience.
People get confused because they can have goals they are conscious of, such as “I want to earn more money this year,” and they can direct much mental energy towards this and still see no changes. This is because most people do not realize how much mental energy is being output by their subconscious mind – thoughts, beliefs and ways of spending and intaking energy that are actually working for the opposite goals, in this case to stay small and stressed about money.
In order to achieve our goals we have to make sure we are directing our energy to what we want. This means having a clear vision rooted in a self-truth that is deeper than our mind. It means operating from a place that is connected to a stronger flow of energy than our self-doubts can siphon away from us.
It also means digging deep into what some of those unconscious fears and sources of self-doubts are and bringing them into the light of awareness where inevitably, they fade.
What are the first steps in rewiring your energetics?
First up, get plugged into a community of people who are impressive to you in the way you want to be. This will create a field for you that you hook into and will begin to pull you toward it. Energetically, this is becoming “resonant” with the things you want to see in your life and as this happens, events will begin to organize in your life around the resonance without your active participation.
Unexpected turns of events take place. If you want to get in better shape, maybe you learn of a new workout routine you fall in love with, or a Soulcycle opens up next door — or maybe you meet a new friend who inspires you to go hiking, which becomes a weekly thing.
We have to remember that anything can happen and serendipities are always available to us when we allow the conditions for them.
Why is it so important to dismantle fear in order to manifest your dreams and goals?
There are two ways to answer this.
Firstly, often when fear is operative in your life, you cannot manifest what you want. Things go sideways. Relationships end before they have begun, promotions pass you by, important conversations didn’t go the way you want them to.
Energetically, fear is a derailer of useful energy being directed at what you want. It actually redirects energy to potentialities that you do not want, which often stagnates manifesting.
So in order for energy to flow directly and freely towards what you want, fear cannot be present and operational. By ‘operational’, I mean fear cannot be what your actions are based from. It can be felt and experienced but in most cases fear cannot be where you are acting from to see truly successful manifestation.
There are, however, situations where acting from fear does get you what you want and this brings me to the second part of this answer.
Sometimes you can achieve a goal through acting from fear and living fearfully. Perhaps you are desperately afraid of poverty and so you make your career decisions based in fear and choose a relatively conservative job track for yourself. We see this all the time!
In this case, a person can desire more success and may well achieve it through working hard out of fear of failing. The catch, though, is that the energetics with which you create are the energetics of the creation.
If you create something from a place of fear to calm yourself in the face of it, then you will perpetuate that fear. You will see it show up in the creation and again and again there will be triggers that cause you to experience your fear regularly. You will not have freed yourself from it, and in fact it will get worse.
For example, the lawyer who chose law for a sense of security is first trapped in paying student debt and then trapped in an affluent lifestyle, having to work long hours just to feel like she won’t lose her house.
You see, to manifest freely fear must not be exalted. It must be seen as a part of our experiences, but it does not hold any rank you do not give it. If you choose so, fear can be understood as a complete illusion and have no bearing on your choices. It is this state of being that is free, and free to manifest the truest expression of the self.
Do you have any recommendations for daily routines/practices to assist in the rewiring process?
First you have to commit to living in your truth. To finding your personal alignment.
Just that initial commitment is a big deal for some people – most are too comfortable (read: uncomfortable) in the constructs they have created to keep them safe from whatever they fear the most. But if you believe in the power of you, the power that we are all connected to, then a life in alignment with your truth is the penultimate joy.
I call this Radical Self Ownership and it begins by starting to pay attention to what happens in your body when you are faced with life’s unfolding. Start paying attention to your reactions more and bring awareness to your behavior.
Move from unconsciously living to consciously living, and then you have power to make change.
What goals are you trying to manifest in the New Year? Tweet us at @BritandCo and let us know! Don't forget to subscribe to our newsletter for all the latest in wellness, food, and creativity.
