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Why do people want to share their relationship status with others?

My sister used to ask me this question when I was in my 20's, and I always looked at her like she had two heads growing. I couldn't fathom the idea that people wouldn't want to talk about their relationship online because it felt like everyone was doing it. I mean, a study from Pew Research Center shows 8 in 10 people on social media see relationship posts, so it clearly wasn't outrageous to think it was normal.

But, that still doesn't answer why people are drawn to sharing cute little updates about their partner or relationship. Luckily, Bray has a good indication of what drives people to give others a sneak peek into their lives. "People share their relationship status for all kinds of reasons. Some want to mark their territory — nothing says 'back off' quite like a cute couple selfie! Others are just excited and proud of their partner and want to share the joy," she says. That stems from people's "need for a sense of belonging or to receive positive reinforcement from others," she adds.

But, this doesn't necessarily make people weird. It's just human nature that makes us act the way we do. "We as humans are just hard wired to seek connection, and broadcasting our connections, makes us feel more accepted and secure in our social lives."

Should couples have conversations about their social media expectations?

I don't care how hot you think someone is, you're going to have to learn how to communicate with them. It's true even if your chemistry is off-the-charts because healthy relationships don't fall out of the sky. They're built via honesty, respect, forgiveness, and other important factors.

Before assuming your partner is or isn't okay with you posting about your relationship, Bray is 100% convinced you should talk things through. "Social media is still in the wild west of relationship etiquette, and without discussions, assumptions about 'correct' behavior can run wild," she hints. For example, you could be happily posting about your partner only for someone to point out that they're not following you on social media.

"Some people are super private, while others practically live their lives online. Misunderstandings happen when expectations aren't laid out so talking about it can prevent messiness in the long run," Bray observes.

If two people have gone on a couple of dates, should one of them be upset if the other isn't publicly talking about them?

So, you swiped right on Tinder or Bumble, and you had a few amazing dates with one of your matches. Before you start publicly declaring your love for them, Bray wants you to reconsider. "Hold on! It's just a few dates! Let’s pump the brakes. The early stages of dating is not the time to make grand social declarations," she declares. As someone who tried to 'date' people from Tinder, those first few dates aren't a guarantee that you've found the love of your life.

"Posting someone on social media can feel like a big step to some people so expecting that level of public commitment too soon might be too much pressure. If you’re already thinking, 'Why haven’t they posted about me yet?' after two dates, it might be a good time to check in with yourself about where those expectations are coming from," advises Bray.

I've recovered from my former, "Is he the one" obsession so also take it from me — see where things go first and then refer back to question #2!

Is it a red flag if someone doesn't post their partner on social media?

It would be so much fun if we personally had Dustin Poynter, the flag guy, from TikTok helping point us in the right direction — but this is one of those things that errs on the subjective side. Though Bray doesn't feel it's necessarily healthier to keep your relationship private, she thinks "context matters." "Some people are just more private or feel weird about social media in general," she says.

But, that doesn't mean certain behaviors don't warrant a few eyebrow raises. She notes," If someone is super active on social—like posting about their dog’s morning routine and every cupcake they’ve ever had—but doesn't ever mention their partner, it could create a need for a deeper conversation." Before you feel justified about grilling your partner — as satisfactory as that may feel — take a second to breathe.

Bray would prefer you work to understand "why they don't post, rather than assuming your partner is keep you a secret." If you discover the latter to be true, follow your instincts and let that person go because you don't deserve that!

Do you think it's healthier for couples to keep certain aspects of their relationship private?

Everyone has a different view of what makes a romantic relationship healthy, so this is one of those things Bray says, "absolutely depends on the couple" because some "genuinely enjoy sharing their lives online." You've probably seen your share of couples who make cute content together whether they're married or not. I'd be lying if I said I don't specifically keep up with a few whose content makes me smile.

But, other couples may not be interested in sharing their relationship online because they "want to be private and keep the relationship free from the judgements or opinions of others," according to Bray. That's not to say they have something to hide, though. Instead, think of it as a personal preference.

"As long as both partners are on the same page and it’s not a source of tension, it’s all about finding the balance that works for them. If it starts to feel like a performance for likes rather than genuine connection, though, that’s where it can become problematic," Bray reminds.

How can someone bring up their partner's posting habits without sounding accusatory?

You may feel eager about posting about your partner while they're less enthusiastic and this could make you feel upset. It's easy to jump to conclusions when you're already upset, but Bray feels "tone is everything." Ironically, she suggests something I've heard in therapy sessions and that's "to be curious, not confrontational." Hopefully this stopped you in your tracks if you were ready to give your partner a piece of your mind.

"You can say something like, 'Hey, I’ve noticed we haven’t shared much about each other on social media? What’s your take on sharing stuff about us online?' It’s important to frame it as a mutual exploration of rather than a demand for a public declaration," Bray points out.

What would you tell someone who wants to emulate couples who consistently post content together?

We've all seen couples who we think have the cutest relationship, even though we've never met them before. As much as you may admire a couple, Bray thinks it's a "slipper slope" if you want to try to recreate their online moments. "I’d encourage someone to focus more on what makes their own relationship feel fulfilling, rather than chasing #couplesgoals," she encourages.

However, this isn't a sign that you're not supposed to ever share anything about your partner or relationship! "If posting together feels fun and real, go for it! But if it starts feeling like a performance or that you are in competition with other couples, it's probably good to take a step back," she warns.

Also, keep in mind that social media doesn't show you every single moment of couples' lives so don't worry about trying to look picture perfect based on a 30 second to 30 minute video.

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Of the 4 new drinks is a traditional café staple – the cortado – that Starbucks has never served before. It’s rumored to be made with shots of the chain’s “higher profile” ristretto espresso.

It also appears as though Starbucks is finally rethinking their approach to matcha lattes. Their current matcha powder comes pre-sweetened, enough to bulk up a single drink with 29 whopping grams of sugar. But, the new (rumored) powder will come “completely unsweetened” and only be sweetened with Starbucks’ classic syrup by default. Plus, the menu leak claims baristas will prepare matcha lattes in a blender moving forward – rather than a shaker – to better infuse the matcha powder for a smoother sip.

The menu leak comes about a month after Starbucks announced they’re no longer charging extra for alternative milk.

All in all, the leaked Starbucks winter menu for 2025 suggests that the chain is making small strides towards authenticity – perhaps a reflection of new CEO Brian Niccol‘s vision to return “back to Starbucks.”

Drinks On The Leaked 2025 Starbucks Winter Menu

NEW! Cortado

Starbucks' cortado debut will reportedly include 3 ristretto shots of blonde espresso and steamed whole milk. Ristretto shots are essentially more condensed than your traditional shot of espresso – they use half the amount of water for a more concentrated, sweeter taste.

Due to the traditional construction of a cortado, this drink will only be available in Starbucks' short size.

This drink is rumored to join the Starbucks winter menu on January 2, 2025.

NEW! Brown Sugar Oat Milk Cortado

The Brown Sugar Oat Milk Cortado is speculated to follow the same recipe, but swaps whole milk for oat milk and adds brown sugar syrup and cinnamon to the mix. It's extremely similar to the chain's popular Brown Sugar Oat Milk Shaken Espresso. It looks delish.

This drink is rumored to join the Starbucks winter menu on January 2, 2025.

NEW! Blackberry Sage Refresher

Now this is how you do a flavor combo. Like most Starbucks Refreshers, this rumored iteration will be available to order as a plain Refresher or with lemonade.

This drink is rumored to join the Starbucks winter menu on February 4, 2025.

Chocolate-Covered Strawberry Crème Frappuccino

This blended frozen bev hit the Starbucks menu back in February 2024, just in time for Valentine's Day (AKA the best holiday ever)! It's supposed to taste just like chocolate-covered strawberries, which makes me want a sip ASAP.

This drink is rumored to join the Starbucks winter menu on February 4, 2025.

NEW! Chocolate Hazelnut Cookie Cold Brew

Hazelnut syrup and chocolate cream cold foam make this cold brew sweet as can be. It gets topped with some cookie crumbles for a fun texture, too. I love hazelnut and chocolate flavors respectively, so when mixed together, it's gotta be tasty!

This drink is rumored to join the Starbucks winter menu on February 4, 2025.

Pistachio Latte

Oh, I can't wait until the Pistacho Latte is back on the menu. Let's hope the rumors are true!

This drink is rumored to join the Starbucks winter menu on January 2, 2025.

Pistachio Cream Cold Brew

Speculated to join the famed Pistacho Latte is the Pistachio Cream Cold Brew, which layers a creamy layer of pistachio-infused cold foam on top of Starbucks' strong cold brew.

This drink is rumored to join the Starbucks winter menu on January 2, 2025.

Food On The Leaked 2025 Starbucks Winter Menu

NEW! Spicy Falafel Pocket

Ooh, this new food item is vegan, according to menu leaks! It's rumored to include smashed falafel, creamy hummus, roasted red bell peppers, pickled onions, and a spicy herb sauce inside a toasted piece of lavash flatbread. Plus, it'll include a dippable cup of Bitchin' Sauce, which I am practically addicted to. I can't wait to try this one!

This item is rumored to join the Starbucks winter menu on January 2, 2025.

Vanilla Bean Custard Danish

This danish is just like Starbucks' classic Cheese Danish, but leans sweeter, thanks to the vanilla bean.

This item is rumored to join the Starbucks winter menu on January 2, 2025.

NEW! Valentine Cake Pop

Finally, this adorable little cake pop – Valentine's-themed, no less – flaunts a cute heart design with flavors of vanilla and buttercream.

This item is rumored to join the Starbucks winter menu on February 4, 2025.