5 Wedding Traditions You Should Break, According to Lauren Conrad

May 18, 2016

Hello again, lovely Brit + Co readers! I’ve been having a wonderful time being the Guest Editor this month, and I hope you’ve all been enjoying my posts — read about how to plan every event leading up to your wedding and my must-know bridal beauty tips. Today I’m sharing my third installment on a topic that we all know and love (and sometimes need to update): wedding traditions. From something borrowed to something blue and everything in between, there are certain wedding traditions that many people assume they have to include in their own special day.

I’m here to tell you that there’s always room to (tastefully) break the rules. To mix things up, here are five new wedding traditions that will make your big day that much more unique and personal. After all, weddings should be a reflection of you and your partner + the traditions that you will be starting together as a new family.

While a church official or other authority figure traditionally conducts weddings, nowadays many couples are opting to have a friend or family member marry them. Speaking from experience (William and I were married by a close friend), our wedding day felt that much more intimate with someone we knew officiating our vows. Think of it as a way of honoring one of your loved ones or including someone special in your big day.

Choosing a wedding cake is as much a part of your special day as picking out your wedding dress. But having a multi-tiered, white frosted cake isn’t for everyone, especially if your sweet tooth is pointing to another favorite dessert.

For my own wedding, I chose to serve our guests apple pies — handmade and freshly baked by me and my closest friends. It added a personal touch and still kept the traditional dessert element involved. If you aren’t too keen on having a wedding cake, I recommend creating your own dessert bar or serving up one of your favorite sweets.

It seems that the cardinal rule when it comes to weddings is that the bride is the only one that wears white. I’m here to tell you that rules were made to be broken! Recently I’ve been seeing bridesmaids wearing white or ivory alongside the bride-to-be, and it looks gorgeous! Switch up the silhouettes or add a splash of texture like beading or lace to differentiate the bridesmaids dresses from the bride’s.

My Paper Crown Bridesmaids Collection has the perfect assortment of ivory dresses that your ‘maids are sure to love!

Traditionally wedding guests sit in rows on either side of the aisle. Instead of setting up chairs in rows that face the altar, set them up in a semicircle. That way everyone has a better view of you and your partner as you tie the knot. Setting your chairs up this way will give your ceremony a more intimate feeling and your guests will feel that much closer.

Grand exits are a fun way to have your wedding guests send you and your beau off at the end of the night — think: sparklers or running through a human tunnel. Usually that means that the party has come to an end and that your friends and family won’t see you until after your honeymoon. Not everyone is ready to close the party down just yet though!

Couples are now inviting their closest friends and family to an after-wedding party to keep the celebration going. Since venues typically have a curfew, consider taking the party home, to the hotel with the highest concentration of your guests or to another nearby location that stays open late.

I’d love to hear how you switched things up at your own wedding! Tweet me and let me know if you’ve tried any of these new wedding traditions!

XO Lauren

(Photos via Slaven Vlasic/Getty Elizabeth Messina, Ailyn La Torre Photography + KT Merry)

Not Close With Your Family? Here's How To Have a Joyous And Connected Holiday Season

Last year, some of us celebrated the holidays apart from our families for the first time. COVID has brought with it many changes, some of them arguably positive (like increased flexibility to work from home), some difficult (such as the realization of vastly different political and social views between family and friends), and some horrible (obviously, the health implications of a global pandemic). However, for some of us, celebrating the holidays without family members isn't exclusively due to COVID. In addition to so many of us living in different areas than our families of origin, some of us simply don't have close bonds with the people we grew up around. Sometimes, this can cause loneliness.

If you're not close with your family members, the holidays can be a difficult time. This is doubly true if you don't have a close circle of friends to call upon. But make no mistake, if this sounds like your situation, you're not alone — there are thousands of other people going through the same struggles you are. We sat down with Irad Eichler, founder of Circles, a website that connects people who are sharing similar struggles, like heartbreak, grief, or loneliness. Here are some of Eichler's tips for coping — and even thriving! — during the holiday season when you're not planning on spending it with your family, for one reason or another.

Don't Fall For "Perfect Families" On Social Media

Laura Chouette

The first VERY important step to having a joyous holiday season when you're going it alone is to stop believing the narrative that others' family situations are perfect, Eichler says.

"Remember people only post a moment in time, and only the moments when they look their happiest and best."

In addition to the fact that everything you see on social media is curated for the 'gram, it's also important to remember that by focusing on what others have and you lack, you risk failing to see the great things at play in your own life.

"These holiday periods can become a time of focusing on who and what we don't have, rather than who or what we do, and can cause a negative spiral into depressing and dreadful feelings of inadequacy," says Eichler.

Gratitude is the reason for the season, after all. So instead of only seeing the negative, try some gratitude journal prompts to help you focus on what's actually really wonderful about your life right now.

Make An Effort To Deepen New Connections

Joel Muniz

While it may seem like everyone has friends and family to spend time with during the holiday season, that doesn't mean no one is available for deepening a blossoming relationship or new friendship.

"Make a list of people you can or would like to connect with, and try to reach out to at least one of them," advises Eichler.

Reaching out doesn't have to mean a big plan or an hour-long conversation. Even a quick text letting a friendly coworker know you're thinking about them can go a long way toward deepening the relationship and moving it in the direction of closer friendship.

Don't have an acquaintance in mind? Then it's time to make new acquaintances. What's more in line with the Christmas spirit than attending a Meetup or event full of people eager to make new friends?

"Join groups with similar interests to yours, such as hiking, baking, or games. Push your boundaries and be brave - you might find new people who have much in common with you."

Give Back

Priscilla Du Preez

The holiday season is a great time to focus on giving back to your community, and coincidentally, acts of generosity and kindness are known to reduce loneliness and help people feel happier. One study found that knowing a few of your neighbors and doing small acts of kindness for them — such as cheering them up, listening to them, mowing their lawn, providing advice about local business recommendations and job opportunities, and chatting over the fence — was statistically correlated with feeling less lonely and having a lower risk of depression.

Helping out elderly neighbors can be a particularly gratifying way to give back.

"Notice older lonely people in your neighborhood or community who might have no family at all, and offer to help them," says Eichler. "These can become mutually meaningful connections, and help you 'adopt' a grandparent."

Connect With Others Online

Thought Catalog

Finally, use the Internet for its highest and best purpose: to connect people. Whether you're using Meetup to find in-person events, digital forums for having conversations about special interests, or programs like Circle for getting support from others in your situation, the opportunities to create new connections are practically endless.

"There are many interest groups that can be found digitally, where or any person can connect with others in the same life stage, going through the same challenges, or who would like to explore the same interests," Eichler states. "Meaningful connections can be formed easily in these circumstances. The Internet enables us to find and connect to people all over the world who fit this, and to whom we can become more easily attached, as we are able to find people with the exact interests that energize us."

If you're struggling with loneliness, you're not alone. Connect with our digital community of makers and creatives here at Brit+Co by following us on IG and signing up for our newsletter!

This post has been updated.

Zach Bryan & Brianna Chickenfry's Break Up Is COMPLICATED — Here's What To Know

Zach Bryan and Brianna "Chickenfry" LaPaglia's explosive breakup is everywhere right now. From his seemingly one-sided social media posts to all the bombshell revelations she keeps dropping, it's clear this split is NOT amicable. Both parties are dropping tons of lore, info, and everything in between — including new music?! — right now, so it makes sense if you can't keep up. Luckily, I'm here to help break this breakup down for you! Here's everything you need to know about Zach Bryan and Brianna Chickenfry's relationship...or lack thereof.

Neilson Barnard/Getty Images for The Recording Academy

October 22, 2024 – Zach Bryan Announces His Breakup With Brianna Chickenfry

On October 22, 2024, after some recent speculation that Zach Bryan and Brianna Chickenfry split up, Zach took to his Instagram stories. The country star said, "Addressing something: Brianna and me have broken up with [each other] and I respect and love her with every ounce of my heart. She has loved me unconditionally for a very long time and for that I'll always thank her."

He continued, noting, "I have had an incredibly hard year personally and struggled through some pretty severe things. I thought it would be beneficial for both of us to go our different ways. I am not perfect and never will be. Please respect Brianna's privacy and space in this and if you have it in your heart, mine too."

To wrap it all up, he closed by apologizing to his fans. He said, "With everything I am and to anyone I let down, I am sorry. I try my best in everything. I failed people that love me and mostly myself."

www.youtube.com

- YouTube

Brianna hopped on her own Instagram stories shortly there after. She posted, "Hey guys I'm feeling really blindsided right now. Gonna hop off social media for a while and attempt to heal privately, when I'm ready I'll be back and ready to talk. I love you guys so much thank you for all of your kind words. Remember you are so loved and everything's always gonna be okay 🫶"

The Brianna got on Youtube next, posting a raw, emotional video about the situation. Sitting on the floor of her bathroom, she opened up as much as she could in the moment about her breakup. She said, "I just woke up to Zach posting on his Instagram that we broke up and I had no idea that post was going up. He didn't text me, he didn't call me. I just woke up to a bunch of texts, like, 'Are you okay?'"

Brianna, with her teary eyes and red face, explained she's been crying for "five days straight." She said, "I'm at the point where it's like, how can you give someone everything and love them so unconditionally, like through stuff that you shouldn't because you just love them and you want them... like you see the good in them?"

The internet personality said that this is all "so embarrassing" and "really, really heartbreaking." She elaborated that the couple broke up on October 21, but wanted to process on her own and "didn't want it to be public."

Much like her Instagram story, she told her audience that she'll come back when she's ready.

www.youtube.com

- YouTube

November 7, 2024 — Brianna Claims Zach's Emotionally Abusive, Wanted $12Mil NDA

Well, it appears this week, Brianna decided she's ready. On Barstool Sports' BFF's Pod November 7, 2024, Brianna gave an inside look at the breakup unlike any other. Not only did she claim Zach was abusive, but she also alleged that he offered her a $12 million NDA to "not talk about the relationship."

After saying it's been the hardest year of her life, she said. "I'm still scared right now because I'm scared of him. My brain's rewired and I'm scared to make him mad and last week, I didn't want to talk about it 'cause I was scared."

Brianna then described the alleged emotional abuse. She noted that everything was cyclical and that he would build her up only to break her back down again. "There was always another excuse as to why he was treating me so poorly and why I'm crying myself to sleep every night, why he's screaming at me," she said. "And then you wake up, it's the apology, it's the 'I'm going to be better like I need you in my life,' but if you've been through this — I don't expect people to understand emotional abuse if you haven't been through it. I hope you never have to go through it but if you've been there you know what I'm talking about."

Not only does Brianna allege she was offered an NDA, but she said that other women that came before her had to sign their own agreements. She declined the offer because she didn't want to "sign away [her] experiences and what [she] went through to protect someone that hurt [her]." She also wanted to share this experience for other women who've suffered something similar.

And when it comes to the logistics of losing out on the famous lifestyle and alleged $12 million? She said, "It was never about the money — I was with the dude because I loved the dude."

Jason Kempin/Getty Images for Pilgrimage Music & Cultural Festival

November 8, 2024 — Zach Quit Touring Amid Abuse Allegations

On November 8, 2024, Zach posted on Instagram — where he clearly loves to share all his big news — that not only is his new single "High Road" out today, but that he's also ending his tour early. Read his full statement here:

After not being home for a year and a half I drove out to my mothers gravestone in the dead of night a few days back on familiar Oklahoma roads and I came to realize just like in the past, that she never would call me again

Told her I quit touring because I got accepted to get my masters in Paris next year, I told her I was back in Oklahoma, told her about all my best friends in New York and all the nights we howled with the moon, told her about the immeasurable laughter my band and me have shared these last five years, all the calluses on my finger tips, every tear shed, told her about making it on The Rolling Stone and most importantly told her about porch swinging with my beautiful sister.
I wrote the chorus for this song a month or two back and finished it when I realized I was blessed with all these things.

I figured it was about time I released it.

Thank you guys for listening to ‘This Worlds a Giant’ last night and thank you to all the people who love me; who have truly carried the weight with me.

Seems that all these Quiet Dreams have gotten much too heavy but I’m home now and I’ll hold you through the pain.

High Road is out today and I appreciate all of you"

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