This Notebook Instantly Syncs Your Handwriting to Your Phone

On BBC Radio's Woman's Hourpodcast, Michelle shared her story of infertility — both how it hurt her, but also how she was able to come to terms with it over time. In discussing what she calls a "shattered mirror moment," Michelle explained that her lack of children wasn't for "lack of trying." She said that she loves children, babies, and even has six godchildren, but she simply wasn't able to bear a biological child.

"I believe that it's a woman's choice — it's your choice whether you want to have children, and shouldn't be imposed on you. Just because you're a woman, you should have a child — that should not be the case," she said. "But as a very personal thing, I wanted — I always wanted to have children."

She elaborated that in her first marriage with Sir Dickson Poon, it was a "very clear path about having children." When she couldn't conceive, she went to get fertility treatment "to aid in the process" — and she made it clear that the process was a very painful one for her. When describing her attempts at conception, she said, "And I think the worst moment to go through is every month you feel like such a failure."

"And then you go, why? And I think at some point you stop blaming yourself. I go, there are certain things in your body that doesn't function in a certain way. That's how it is," she continued. "You just have to let go and move on. And I think you come to a point where you have to stop blaming you."

While she may have practically moved on from her dream of carrying biological children — of that, she said, "I'm 62. Of course I'm not going to have a baby right now," — Michelle can't seem to help thinking of it still. She said, "Sometimes, honestly, I still think about it."

Getting to this place of peace and understanding for her fertility scenario came with a series of heartbreaks, though, as Michelle explained this likely ended her first marriage. Although she believed they loved each other, she knew in the next decade of the relationship, she ultimately couldn't give her ex-husband the family that he wanted. Now, she feels like it was "very brave" for the former couple "to admit" that they shouldn't "drag this out."

Thankfully, the end of her marriage didn't mar the love shared there — Michelle said she's actually godmother to Sir Dickson Poon's eldest child. And she even got remarried! Though her new husband, Jean Todt, proposed the very first month they were together, Michelle waited to marry until about 20 years later.

As mentioned before, Michelle is surrounded by plenty of beautiful children in her life — one of which is her granddaughter via her stepson, Nicholas Todt. In regards to that, Michelle noted, "Then you feel you're still very, very blessed because you do have a baby in your life.”

And as for having a little one in her life outside of children? Let's just say she has a golden boy of her own — and yes, I'm referring to the Oscar she won in 2023 for Everything Everywhere All at Once. Needless to say, Michelle is definitely not a failure. 🙌