My Immigrant Background Taught Me — and My Kids — to Embrace Difference

Brit + Co staffers’ stories on immigrant heritage and the lessons of an American dream.

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Until I moved to California in my 20s, I didn’t really consider, much less embrace, my second-gen immigrant-ness. My mom had come to the US so very long ago. She came at a time when being an immigrant was common, but assimilating was 100 percent the goal. She never taught me Japanese, because she never wanted me to have an accent. She wanted me to do better and have more, and she thought being a ‘believable’ American was the only way to win.

But growing up as the only Asian in my Southern, rural small town, everyone *definitely* knew that I was the kid of a very foreign-looking and -sounding immigrant, and there was likely zero chance I’d be a believable American to them. But that wasn’t gonna stop me from trying! There were white and Black people and communities in our town, and — since I wasn’t Black — I figured I must be white. And I tried SO hard to be that white girl I thought I was. I applied all of the hardcore Japanese work ethic and competitiveness that my Tiger-Mom mother instilled in me into trying to will that whiteness into reality.

Just before high school, I finally wised up and stopped trying to be white, and just started becoming a weirdo, a decision that actually served me well. Being my own person got me out of that town and off to college in Boston. Being a poor, immigrant outcast put that fight in me to kick ass and keep pushing. And being driven by that immigrant mom made me work hard until I was good at what I wanted to do. But it wasn’t until that move to San Francisco that I truly stopped trying to deny my heritage.

Growing up isolated with my mom and no other family, I had never shared a common culture and cultural experience. Here, there were people legitimately PROUD of who their families were and where they were from, and that was very liberating. I finally had people who I could connect with on this entirely new cultural level. It took time, but I slowly embraced it. I was eventually motivated to go with my mom to Japan to meet my family, and this year I took my kids back to Japan to meet *our* family. It was one of the most fulfilling and moving experiences of my life. I’m so happy my kids don’t start out with my baggage; they can start off life being proud to be from immigrants, and to never stop feeling that pride.

After decades of literally wishing my difference away, I’ve finally lovingly accepted it. My difference now gives me a community that I never have to earn. My difference gives me dimension and stories and traditions that I can pass on to my children. And now that I’m finally here after my long journey of acceptance, I’ve never been more fiercely protective of that difference and of all the other beautifully, wonderfully different immigrants who have come here to make America *truly* great.

Annette Cardwell is the VP of Editorial at Brit + C0.

(Banner illustration by Yising Chou. Photos provided by author.)

Last week, Kirstjen Nielsen, the Homeland Security Secretary, testified once again in front of Congress in an attempt to justify the federal government’s ongoing actions against undocumented people at the border. Among her assertions, Nielsen said that the chain-link enclosures used to hold undocumented children could not really be described as cages, and that some parents who had been separated from their children at the border were subsequently deported without their kids. These grim updates to the Trump administration’s “zero-tolerance” policy of immigrant family separation shortly preceded a report from the New York Times that revealed the extent to which family separation remains ongoing — despite a federal judge’s order to halt the practice some nine months ago.

“The latest data reported to the federal judge monitoring one of the most controversial of President Trump’s immigration policies shows that 245 children have been removed from their families since the court ordered the government to halt routine separations under last spring’s ‘zero tolerance’ border enforcement policy,” reads the March 9 Times report.

The Texas Civil Rights Project (TCRP) reports that the total number of immigrant children removed from their families since the summer of 2018 may be even higher. In the six months after Trump issued an Executive Order to end the practice, the organization interviewed nearly 10,000 immigrants and asylum-seekers who entered US border custody at or near McAllen, Texas. Through that process, the TCRP identified 272 adults who said they had been forcibly separated from one or more children under the age of 18.

“The government has admitted what we’ve known for months: they never stopped separating families who came to this country seeking safety,” Efrén C. Olivares, the Racial and Economic Justice Program Director at Texas Civil Rights Project, said in a statement made available to us. “The Trump Administration has tried every strategy it can think of in our courts to continue taking children away from their parents, with no transparency about how these decisions are made, no plan to reunite them, and no accountability.”

According to the TCRP, among the 272 adults they spoke to who said they had been separated from child family members, 38 were parents or legal guardians who reported being separated from a total of 46 children were separated. 25 of these children were reportedly under the age of 10. The youngest infant impacted was 8.5 months old at the time of separation from her mother.

“To date, the government has not reported these children to anyone — neither to the courts nor to Congress — and the government has admitted it may be impossible to find all separated children,” TCRP reports.

The TCRP report recounts an interview with a father who was allegedly separated from his seven-year-old son because of a misdemeanor conviction for battery over 10 years ago. Another father was reportedly separated from his one-year-old daughter and nine-year-old son on “uncorroborated allegations of gang affiliation.” A woman, who fled her country because she was being held captive as a sexual slave, was reportedly separated from her child because officials said she was “a danger to society and unfit to be a parent” after they learned she had shot her captor non-fatally in self-defense. The list goes on and on.

According to NBC News, immigration officials can separate children “if the adult is not the parent or legal guardian of the child” and “if the safety of the child is at risk or because of ‘serious criminal activity’ by the adult.” Legal recourse can be limited for these parents.

But there is hope. Earlier this year, we reported that several law firms including the Southern Poverty Law Center have filed a lawsuit on behalf of 10,000 detained immigrant children due to allegations of unfit facilities, illegal prolonged stays, sexual abuse, and much more.

On March 8, in a promising victory for undocumented families, US District Judge Dana Sabraw ruled in favor of a separate lawsuit by the American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) against the Trump administration and said that “all migrant families separated during the government’s border crackdown should be included in a class-action lawsuit,” the Texas Tribunereports.

“The hallmark of a civilized society is measured by how it treats its people and those within its borders,” Sabraw wrote in a 14-page ruling. “That Defendants may have to change course and undertake additional effort to address these issues does not render modification of the class definition unfair; it only serves to underscore the unquestionable importance of the effort and why it is necessary (and worthwhile).”

(Photo by John Moore/Getty Images)

My best friends mean the world to me, and though I wish I could give them the world, this year, I just want to get them gifts that are as special as our friendship. Whether it’s a personalized pendant, a cute skincare set, or the lip shade they simply can’t stop talking about, I want them to know just how much I care about their companionship! Thus, I’ve curated the ultimate list of gifts for best friends to help you gift your besties something they’ll truly love, especially if it comes from you. These gifts are so good, I really want them for myself, too.

Our 40 favorite gifts for best friends:

Scroll on to see the absolute best gifts for best friends to give in 2024!

Amazon

1. Scent Beauty by Sabrina Carpenter Cherry Baby Eau de Parfum

Leave it to Sabrina Carpenter to influence my list of gifts for best friends. Her "Cherry Baby" scent carries sultry notes of vanilla, peony, cherries, and chocolate, which is the perfect aroma for a night out with the girls.

Summer Fridays

2. Summer Fridays Lip Butter Balm

This lip balm is viral for a reason. Your besties' lips deserve all the instant moisture, color, and shine this tube provides. This brown sugar shade looks decadent AF, but you can also snag it in other fun 'flavors' like iced coffee and mint.

Urban Outfitters

3. Camp Snap Screen-Free Digital Camera

For the one that's always documenting the friend group's antics, they'll enjoy taking this unique, screen-free digicam on nights out, weekend trips, and cozy nights in! It captures film-style photos (without the time-consuming film photography process), and it can be used over and over again since it's rechargeable.

SeaVees

4. SeaVees Hayward Platform Shoes

Moccasin-style shoes are super popular this winter. I love how comfortable SeaVees' shoes are, so I might just have to share the love with my besties this holiday season... and snag a pair for myself so we can match, of course!

Dieux

5. Dieux Angel Face Cleanser + Moisturizer Bundle

Dieux is one of my go-to skincare brands for effective products that still take it easy on my sensitive skin. Their Baptism cleanser, part of this giftable duo, provides a nice clean without stripping any moisture from my skin. I also use their Instant Angel moisturizer religiously in the wintertime since things tend to get real dry. I'd say you can confidently gift this set to besties of any skin type.

Anthropologie

6. By Anthropologie Monogram Heart Locket Necklace

Personalized gifts will always feel special. Kick this gift idea up a notch by inserting a little pic of you and your BFF in the locket before wrapping and handing it over!

Urban Outfitters

7. Baggu Mini Nylon Shoulder Bag

I carry this Baggu bag just about everywhere I go. It's perfect for happy hours or dinners since it's small and not too much of a hassle to tow along, but don't let its size fool you: this baby can fit a lot. Your most stylish best friend will be wearing it the moment they open their gift!

Target

8. Jingle & Mingle 5 Days of Rosé Wine Set

You can never go wrong with rosé, baby! This gift set carries 5 personal-sized bottles of different varieties for them to sip on around the holidays.

Kulfi Beauty

9. Kulfi Beauty All Night Out Eye Set

This eye makeup set is complete with a bold eyeliner shade and a shimmery pot of eyeshadow. You get to choose the exact shades of each before purchasing, so this is truly one of the most fun personalized gift ideas. The set also comes with a funky pair of mismatched hair clips – so cute!

Dame

10. Dame Massage Oil Candle

This soothing candle melts down into a sweet-smelling massage oil that's easily dispensable, thanks to the pointed spout on the glass. This is a great gift for your single and partnered pals alike, whether they're using it to wind down themselves or for sexy time with their S.O.!

Life is Good

11. Life is Good 'I Deserve A Little Treat' Boxy Crusher Tee

Everyone deserves a little treat. Wrap up this awesome (and comfy!) tee alongside your bestie's favorite snack, sweet treat, or freshly-baked dessert to totally nail their gift this year!

Compartés

12. Compartés Pistachio Sea Salt Chocolate Truffles

These aesthetically-pleasing truffles could be the perfect sweet treat in question!

Nordstrom

13. OSEA Super Glow Body Set

I know anyone in my close friends circle would be happy to be gifted some nice skincare goodies. This luxe set from OSEA comes with a body wash, oil, and serum to keep skin looking and feeling happy!

Subscribe to our newsletter for even more holiday gift ideas!

Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

From the get-go, a major priority of the Trump administration’s anti-immigration policy has been the restriction of “chain migration,” the trickle-down immigrant sponsorship process by which many families — including his wife Melania’s — immigrate to the US. To this end, the administration has rolled out one policy after another that specifically targets immigrant families, from separations at the US-Mexico border to threats on birthright citizenship. The administration has also made it nearly impossible for immigrants to become citizens if they’ve used social services like children’s health insurance or SNAP.

All the while, the president and his staff have repeatedly insisted that the country would continue to welcome skilled “legal” immigrants who would be an asset to the economy, even announcing a plan to increase the number of H-1B visas the US would give. Now, the Trump administration is targeting tens of thousands of those same, highly skilled visa holders at the family level by moving to eliminate their spouses’ legal right to work in the United States.

On Wednesday, US Citizenship and Immigration Services (USCIS) reportedly submitted a proposed regulation to the White House Office of Management and Budget that would put an end to a program that gives work permits to the spouses of H-1B visa holders who are waiting to receive green cards — a process that can take years.

H-1B visas are temporary work visas provided to foreign-born workers in “specialty services,” such as a STEM field. The visas are chosen through a random lottery that workers must apply for in advance. Spouses or dependents of H-1B visa holders who are above age 21 have, in the past, been able to apply for H-4 visas so that they can work while their partners wait to receive permanent residency. The rule that permits certain spouses of H-1B visas to qualify for temporary work visas of their own was only put into place in 2015, under the Obama administration.

Ending the program would mean some 90,000 people who are married to temporary work visa holders will lose their ability to work legally in the US. According to Bloomberg, most of the spouses who will be impacted by this policy change are women from India.

“USCIS continues reviewing all employment-based visa programs,” USCIS spokesperson Jessica Collins said in a statement Thursday. “No decision about the regulation concerning the employment eligibility of certain H-4 spouses is final until the rule-making process is complete.”

The Trump administration announced its intentions to alter these programs in the spring of 2017, when the president signed the “Buy American and Hire American” executive order. The order outlines the administration’s general plans to exclude more and more foreign-born workers from the American workforce and to discourage the purchase of certain products made outside the US. Following this order, the US Citizenship and Immigration Services indicated that it would do away with the H-4 program, according to Wired.

Very soon after the Obama administration implemented the H-4 program for the spouses of certain H-1B visa-holders, a group of IT workers calling themselves “Save Jobs USA” filed a lawsuit against the Department of Homeland Security, claiming that the government was illegally taking jobs from US-born citizens. The group was represented by John Miano, an attorney for the Center for Immigration Studies, a far-right anti-immigration group. But now there’s no longer a need for the lawsuit to continue on, as the government will be ending the program itself — a win for the far-right groups who supported the suit.

In a 2018 Wired article about those who stand to lose their ability to work with the end of the H-4 program, one woman, Sampada Khanapurkar, summarized how this change is acting as a deterrent for families like hers. “I mean, I’ve been here so long, I just thought, ‘These people are mine.’ And now people aren’t accepting me. It’s not a good feeling,” Khanapurkar said. “I told my husband yesterday, if this is how we’re feeling and this is how we’re going to be feeling every single day of our lives, living in fear, never know when our visas will be revoked, never know when we’ll be accepted here legally, in spite of being legal, we might as well go to a place where people are accepting of us.”

Deterring Black and brown immigrants from coming to the US, or staying in the US, is exactly what these policies are designed to do. The administration spelled out clearly that the cruel policy of separating children from their parents at the US-Mexico border was intended as a deterrent measure, to scare asylum-seekers and migrants from even attempting to come to the US. The new proposed policy represents yet another example of a measure that creates a hostile environment for individuals who wish to immigrate.

What do you think? Tell us on Twitter @BritandCo.

(Photo by Scott Olson/Getty Images)

Our favorite dancing queens (Meryl Streep included) might be returning to the big screen for a third encore of Mamma Mia! and we’re already rewatching the first two movie musicals in preparation.

In an interview with Deadline in May of 2023, Mamma Mia! franchise creator and producer Judy Craymer said a third movie musical is in "earliest stages." She also shared that she has come up with a way to bring Meryl Streep back again.

"I don't want to over-egg it," she said of the unofficial news, "but I know there's a trilogy there…and I do think Meryl should come back, and if the script is right, she would, I think, because she really loved playing Donna."

"Of course I want to do it," Streep said during the 2024 Cannes Film Festival (via Deadline). Sounds promising to us!

Is Mamma Mia 3 happening?

Universal Pictures

Yes, Mamma Mia 3 is in its early planning stages! Christine Baranski just told The Hollywood Reporter that she's met with producer Judy Kramer, and that Kramer has plans for the third movie. "She gave me the narrative plotline of how it’s going to happen," Baranski says. "That’s all I can say! But, it’s not like, 'Oh, I wish it could happen!' Judy Kramer makes things happen. She made number two happen, and it was a phenomenal hit. I wouldn’t put it past Judy Kramer to get everybody back together."

Universal Pictures

A third installation was first mentioned way back in 2020, during a Collider interview with Mamma Mia! star Amanda Seyfried. Seyfried said she was on board — and at the time, she thought the rest of the star-studded cast would be too.

"Listen, every single person in that movie would say yes in a heartbeat because we want to hang out with each other," Seyfried told Collider at the time. "That's what we talked about last time, like did we ever think that we'd end up here again on an Island in Croatia?"

When will Mamma Mia 3 come out?

Universal Pictures

We don't have an official answer about when to expect this highly anticipated sequel. The project is in the "earliest stages," according to creator and producer, Judy Craymer. Cher also revealed to Entertainment Weekly that everyone is "talking about it," but she doesn't "know when they're going to do it."

Has casting information been shared about Mamma Mia 3?

Jonathan Prime/Universal Studios

While nothing's been made official, Amanda Seyfried just said something that made my heart skip a beat. She told ABC News she loves Sabrina Carpenter's music and dropped this admission: "If Sabrina Carpenter wants to play my daughter, I’ll make it happen."

But before she admitted that, the actress said something else that made me raise my eyebrows. "Everybody says it’s gonna happen, but I mean, I haven’t seen a script."

Cher is also eager to return to the beloved franchise and is rooting for Meryl to make an appearance again. "I keep saying, 'Meryl, you've got to come back,'" she said (via Entertainment Weekly). She also said she's told her, "'It'll be fun. You'll have a good time. You'll be able to sing.'"

I don't know what it'll take, but hope someone gets a script in Amanda Seyfried, Cher, and Meryl Streep's hands ASAP!

What is the first Mamma Mia about?

Universal Pictures

The first film follows Donna (Streep) and Sophie (Seyfried) as mother and daughter living on a remote Greek island. When Sophie is about to marry Sky (Dominic Cooper), she sets out to learn who her real father is after discovering it could be one of three men (played by Pierce Brosnan, Stellan Skarsgard, and Colin Firth).

Who does the second Mamma Mia follow?

Universal Pictures / NBCUniversal

Mamma Mia 2takes viewers back to 1979, where young Donna (Lily James) embarks on a series of adventures throughout Europe following her Oxford University graduation. On her journeys, she makes the acquaintances of Harry, Bill and Sam – the latter whom she falls in love with. In the present day, pregnant Sophie dreams of renovating a taverna while reuniting with her mother's old friends and boyfriends on a Greek island island.

TBH, we’re pretty happy that Mamma Mia! is far from over, and we can’t wait to see what the franchise has in store for us next. Stay updated on all the latest entertainment news with Brit + Co.

This post has been updated.

There's nothing ~normal~ about how much we love Normal People's Paul Mescal & Daisy Edgar-Jones. While it turns out we're not getting a Normal People season 2 (yet), the two actors are starring in some of 2024's biggest blockbusters (Twisters and Gladiator II, namely), and we've been soaking up their presences ever since.

Paul recently exhibited his ongoing friendship with Daisy at the Gladiator II premiere in Los Angeles. While he approached Brittany Broski on the red carpet for an interview, he recognized her from her recent 'Royal Court' interview with Daisy:

"You were with Daisy!" he chimed in excitingly. We just love this power duo!

Enda Bowe/Hulu

Daisy Edgar-Jones also revealed that she's remained incredibly close to Paul Mescal after their time on Hulu's Normal People. "Paul is one of my lifetime best friends," she says. "He’s an incredibly grounded person and I am too, I think, so it’s nice to be able to have those touchstones and those people you can laugh about it with and be lighthearted with. We met when I was 20 and Paul was 22; I’m so excited to see where we’ll be at 32, 42, and what life will bring us."

But the coolest thing is that not only is Normal People special for Paul and Daisy, but they've also been able to see the effect of the show on its fans.

"The thing I love people saying the most is, 'It made me contact my ex,'" Daisy continues. "Especially when much older people say, 'I just wanted to reach out to the person I was with when I was 17 just to say you were a big part of my history and thanks for being part of who I am, the tapestry of my life.' And that I really love, because I’m a massive romantic."

Daisy recently revealed they bonded over their training for Twisters and Gladiator II.

"I did running lessons — isn’t that crazy?" she told Variety. "Actually, Paul [Mescal] and I were laughing about it, because he was training for 'Gladiator II' and I was training for 'Twisters,' and obviously he had to be huge and I was like, 'Don’t worry, I’m going to be right up there with you.'"

Let us know your favorite Normal People moment in the comments and check out 5 Leading Ladies We'd Love To See In A Paul Mescal Rom-Com.

This post has been updated with additional reporting by Meredith Holser.