8 Relationship Resolutions That Will Make You a Better Boo

For many of us, 2016 was a doozy, but we here at Brit + Co are ready to hit refresh in 2017! Follow our Hit Refresh series through January for new ideas, hacks and skills that will help you achieve (and maintain!) those New Year’s resolutions.

Ah, 2016: the year that iconic celebs like David Bowie, Alan Rickman and, most recently, Carrie Fisher, passed away. The year of a stressful, dramatic election and ugly fashion trends we won’t miss. But “that year” (as we’ll refer to it), also brought us some really heartwarming moments, like a historic World Series win by the Chicago Cubs and ah-dorable baby announcements. Still, 2016 left us a bit on edge. That stress definitely affects our relationships, so when 2017 throws the first curveball of the year at us, we’re preparing to take it on — not take it out on our S.O. — by making these seven good person/good girlfriend resolutions.

1. Listen more. The old saying goes that we were given two ears and one mouth in order to listen more than we speak. While listening is still difficult (okay, it’s the hardest) to master, it’s the most effective skill you can have in relationships. Even if you resolve simply to interrupt less, your S.O. will thank you for it.

2. Exercise selfless love. The hardest form of affection is that which doesn’t directly benefit you. Doing the dishes after you two make dinner doesn’t necessarily make you happier, but these little acts of selflessness will go a long way in making your partner feel loved. Here’s the key to executing them well: Do them and expect absolutely nothing in return.

3. But put yourself first. Just because you act selflessly in your relationship doesn’t mean your partner should always come before you. In fact, it’s quite the opposite. Continue to take time for your goals, friends and the solo activities you love. It’s amazing how much being fulfilled outside of your relationship will strengthen the bond between you and your boo.

4. Start with the little things. Big, lofty resolutions are hard to accomplish, sometimes simply because of their vagueness. Instead of resolving to “be a better partner,” pledge to keep a shared space tidier or to spend less time on your phone while together.

5. But focus on the big picture. While little measurable goals are optimal for creating change, keeping your big ideals and hopes in mind when executing them will help keep your relationship heading in the direction you want it to. Perhaps you need to check in with your partner about where you want things to go, or are ready for a new life stage such as co-living or an engagement. Whatever stage you’re at, being open about your long-term goals will put the short-term ones in much greater perspective.

6. Say you’re sorry and mean it. The ability to apologize ranks high on the list of relationship deal-breakers. One tangible way to up your game as an S.O. is to improve your ability to admit when you’re wrong. Your relationship will be much more enjoyable for you and your boo if you both promise to wholeheartedly apologize.

7. Forgive. Apologies are null if not for forgiveness. Just as you’d hope for your partner to accept your apology, exercise forgiveness when it’s their turn to say sorry. Don’t just add their mistakes to a growing list you bring up during every fight.

8. Love yourself too. There are a million ways to be a better partner. However, these are totally void if you don’t first love yourself. Plain and simple. If you can’t achieve the above resolutions all at once, don’t beat yourself up! Trying to be a better partner is a worthy goal to continue pursuing, but don’t make it so much of a priority that you forget to practice self-love.

What 2017 resolutions do you have for your relationship? Let us know @BritandCo!

(Photos via Getty)

Sometimes we're looking for love in all the wrong places — and sometimes we're just looking for love in all the wrong ways. That's where your rising sign can come in. In this week's Ask An Astrologer column with Lumi Pelinku, our reader feels like they just can't find their footing romantically. Luckily, Lumi has the best relationship advice — and it all starts with your rising sign! Here's how you can use your own rising sign to level up your romantic life!

Juan Pablo Serrano

Dear Lumi: Will I ever be worthy of being loved romantically? I have never been in a relationship, and I’m scared I will never be. I have so much love to give, but I don’t think I’ll ever have the chance to show it.

Bean, Illinois

  • Sun sign: Virgo
  • Rising sign: Cancer
  • Moon sign: Gemini

Yuri Manei

Dear Virgo: I understand where you're coming from, as many people feel this way these days. Here’s a little personal story from my journey: In my early 20s, I was pretty inexperienced in love and pressured by societal expectations to settle down by 30. Sigh...

I went to great lengths to attract a partner, even dabbling in spells and misleading manifestation techniques. Please tread carefully if you're trying this. Instead of finding true love, I drew a series of “ghosts” and situationships. I felt I had so much love to offer, but it all led to emptiness and eventually a toxic relationship with someone I thought was my soulmate, but turned out to be my karmic partner. There’s more to this story, but let’s save it for another time.

The end of that relationship led me to discover the essence of self-love and self-acceptance, eventually stepping into my own worth. Astrology has become a guiding light for me in that regard — and can be for you, too.

​Let’s Talk About Your Rising Sign & How It Defines Your Relationship Standards

Luke Miller

In astrology, examining your rising sign can offer profound insights. With Cancer rising, your soul yearns for deep, emotional connections. Creating a biological or soul family may bring you joy and fulfillment. Opposite Cancer is Capricorn, which governs the 7th house of your birth chart — the area that reveals the type of partners you need and what you should embody to feel complete, whether you’re with someone or not. A Capricorn-ruled 7th house suggests that a structured, secure, and straightforward partner will align with your needs. If you find yourself in a relationship that feels stagnant or uncertain from the start, it’s a sign that you’re not embodying Capricorn’s qualities, and it might be time to move on.

Arina Krasnikova

Your natural tendency to give and care deeply for others stems from a place of genuine concern and desire to ensure everyone’s well-being. However, it’s crucial for you to seek security from within. Feeling at home in your skin and living in the moment are great starting points.

Avoid individuals who offer unrequited love or broken promises. You may have an intuitive sense that you might overlook — trust it. By becoming more aware of your physical and emotional responses to others, you can discern between genuine connections and energy-draining situations. Establishing a practice of quiet reflection and observation can facilitate understanding the root of your heightened emotions.

Cliff Booth

The core message here is to build security within yourself and extend grace and understanding to yourself throughout your journey. It’s perfectly okay to be single right now; you're worthy of attracting a partner who will cherish all of you. To find the love of your life, you must first love yourself — not in a self-centered way, but by honoring your own needs and boundaries. Saying no to situations and people not aligning with your sensitive soul will make you stronger than you realize. The Universe will respond with an endearing relationship by practicing this because you’ve learned to honor yourself.

With Love and Stars,

Lumi

​How Your Rising Sign Cultivates Self-Acceptance and Attracts the Love You Need

Alexander Mass

Like an outfit, your rising sign showcases your personality, identity, and perception of the world. What if I tell you that the rising sign can also attract the love you need in your journey? Think of your rising sign as your energy and how you embody it. It's the mirror we carry, and by our energy, we can keep it clean and pristine or murky and distorted. Sometimes, we cannot stand what we see in ourselves, and that channeled energy emanates outward, creating distortion-filled experiences. When this happens, you lose your 'main character' energy, which results in you leaving your life to chance rather than writing your chapters. When you embody complete self-acceptance and happiness within yourself, these are the key ingredients in powering up your rising sign and your 7th house.

As you begin to feel at peace, love, and harmony to the best of your ability, this will attract what you desire in your life and in love. The world will respond and reflect back all that we project. It’s that simple. Our rising sign is responsible for this active energy, and learning how to master it, will be the key to help you understand the nature of your personality while also attracting your dreams. The ascendant is the portal of your experiences, good and bad. Now that we understand the gist of the rising sign, let's explore your rising sign and how you can tap into your main character energy.

​Love Alchemy: How Your Rising Sign Shapes Relationships

Brit + Co

Aries Rising

Aries Rising radiates a bold, adventurous energy, often attracting equally spirited partners. To attract the love of their life, they should embrace their assertiveness and passion. By channeling the competitive energy of their 7th house (Libra), they can cultivate harmony in relationships without sacrificing their individuality. Self-acceptance means recognizing their fierce independence while being open to collaboration and compromise. The dynamic energy of Mars empowers them to attract a partner who admires their fiery spirit yet values partnership.

Brit + Co

Taurus Rising

Grounded and sensual, Taurus Rising can attract lasting love through their nurturing nature. Their 7th house energy in Scorpio encourages depth and intensity in relationships. To manifest their ideal partner, Taurus Rising must embrace their inner beauty and the pleasure of self-care. By embodying their desire for stability and security, they can project an aura of comfort and reliability, making them irresistible to those seeking genuine connections. Venus, their ruling planet, enhances their allure, helping them draw the right kind of love.

Brit + Co

Gemini Rising

With a quick wit and charm, Gemini Rising attracts partners through intellectual stimulation. Their 7th house in Sagittarius encourages exploration and adventure. To attract their soulmate, they should openly embrace their duality and communicate their needs and desires. Their self-acceptance journey involves acknowledging their inquisitiveness while finding ways to ground themselves in relationships. Mercury, their ruling planet, sharpens their communication skills, enabling them to draw in a partner who shares their passion for life and learning.

Brit + Co

Cancer Rising

Cancer Rising embodies warmth and nurturing energy, making them deeply appealing to potential partners. Their 7th house in Capricorn requires a balance between emotional depth and practical commitment. To attract a lasting love, Cancer Rising should accept their need for security while being open to vulnerability. Utilizing their emotional intelligence to discern their connections creates a safe space for love to flourish. The Moon, their ruling planet, enhances their intuition and empathy, helping them attract a partner who values their nurturing nature and ambition.

Brit + Co

Leo Rising

Confident and charismatic, Leo Rising draws people in with their radiant energy. Their 7th house in Aquarius encourages them to seek uniqueness in relationships. To draw in the love they need, Leo Rising must embody self-love while giving space for individuality. By embracing their creativity and leading with generosity, the Sun, their ruling planet, inspires them to attract a partner who appreciates their vibrant spirit and shares their vision for a progressive, loving partnership.

Brit + Co

Virgo Rising

Practical and detail-oriented, Virgo Rising has a unique charm that attracts partners seeking stability and support. Their 7th house in Pisces invites them to explore relationships' emotional and spiritual aspects. Virgo Rising should love their imperfections and the beauty of vulnerability to attract an epic partnership. By cultivating self-acceptance and finding joy in the little things, Mercury, their ruling planet, helps them draw in a partner who appreciates their grounded nature while encouraging emotional exploration.

Brit + Co

Libra Rising

Charming and harmonious, Libra Rising attracts partners through their innate ability to create beauty and balance. Their 7th house in Aries prompts them to be more assertive in love. Libra Rising must embrace the desire for partnership to attract their ideal partner while also recognizing the importance of self-identity. Being bold in expressing their needs will ignite their main character energy, as Venus, their ruling planet, empowers them to draw in a partner who values connection and independence.

Brit + Co

Scorpio Rising

Intense and magnetic, Scorpio Rising naturally attracts people with their enigmatic presence. Their 7th house in Taurus urges them to seek relationship stability and loyalty. Scorpio Rising should tap into their emotional depth and learn to communicate openly to attract the love they desire. Valuing their worth is vital to mastering their life path. By engaging in self-love and finding a balance between their passionate nature and a desire for security, Pluto and Mars, their ruling planets, will manifest in attracting a partner who appreciates their intensity and commitment.

Brit + Co

Sagittarius Rising

Adventurous and free-spirited, Sagittarius Rising attracts partners through their love of exploration and philosophy. Their 7th house in Gemini encourages communication and curiosity in relationships. To attract their ideal love, Sagittarius Rising has to tap into their quest for knowledge while remaining open to commitment. By cultivating self-worth and expressing their authentic self, Jupiter, their ruling planet, guides them in drawing in a partner who shares their passion for adventure and intellectual pursuits.

Brit + Co

Capricorn Rising

Disciplined and ambitious, Capricorn Rising manifests partnerships through their drive and determination. Their 7th house in Cancer encourages them to explore emotional depth in relationships. To attract lasting love, Capricorn Rising should tap into their nurturing side and allow themselves to be vulnerable. By practicing self-love while balancing their ambitions with emotional availability, Saturn, their ruling planet, aids them in attracting a partner who admires their strength while valuing emotional connection.

Brit + Co

Aquarius Rising

Innovative and independent, Aquarius Rising draws in partners with their unique perspectives and humanitarian spirit. Their 7th house in Leo invites them to ignite creativity and passion in relationships. Aquarius Rising must acknowledge their desire for freedom while recognizing the value of connection to attract the love they desire. By embodying their authentic and unique self, Uranus, their ruling planet, inspires them to draw in a partner who appreciates their individuality and shares their vision for a better world.

Brit + Co

Pisces Rising

Dreamy and compassionate, Pisces Rising attracts partners through their empathetic and intuitive nature. Their 7th house in Virgo encourages them to seek practicality and service in relationships. To attract true love, it's vital for Pisces Rising to embrace their sensitivity while grounding themselves in reality. By practicing self-love and setting healthy boundaries, Neptune and Jupiter, their ruling planets, will manifest a partner who appreciates their depth and aligns with their desire for meaningful connections.

Katerina Holmes

Understanding your rising sign can be a powerful tool for self-discovery and personal growth. Exploring your ascendant's unique traits and energies will help you get to know yourself and all its shades and how you navigate love and relationships. This awareness empowers you to embrace your authentic self and enables you to identify patterns that may hold you back. As you align with your rising sign's essence and ruling planet, you can cultivate more happiness and confidence, opening pathways to attract meaningful connections and experiences that resonate with your true essence. Embracing your rising sign invites you to step into your main character energy, allowing you to write your story with intention and authenticity.

Want to find out how astrology can be the guiding tool to self-acceptance and fulfillment? Click here and claim your copy of Lumi's Beginner's Astrology Book.

For more astrology advice, be sure to Ask Lumi for advice, and follow the conversation on Facebook!

Zoë Kravitz and Channing Tatum made headlines for their whirlwind romanceafter they met while making Zoë's directorial debutBlink Twice. Fans were so excited to learn they were engaged, but on October 29, multiple sources reported that the couple had broken up — and called off their upcoming wedding. Here's a look back at their relationship timeline.

Zoë Kravitz And Channing Tatum's Relationship Timeline

Image via Michael Loccisano/Getty Images

February 10, 2017 — The Lego Batman Movie Premieres

Glimmers of their love story began in 2017 when Zoë Kravitz and Channing Tatum lent their voices to the hit animated film, The Lego Batman Movie. Little did they know that this animated connection would pave the way for their real-life love story a few years later.

Image via Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images for ABA

Summer 2021 — Zoë Kravitz And Channing Tatum Work Together Again

Kravitz was all set to work with Tatum in her directorial debut film P*ssy Island. This creative endeavor brought the two closer, both personally and professionally, setting the stage for a unique partnership. While working on the film, Tatum advised Kravitz not to take on too much, showcasing the supportive and collaborative nature of their relationship. Both stars had nothing but praise for each other's work and creativity.

Image via Neilson Barnard/Getty Images

August 2021 — Zoë Kravitz Gets A Fresh Start

At the start of 2021, Zoë Kravitz divorced her former spouse, eventually sparking rumors a possible romance with Channing Tatum. This marked the potential for the beginning of their exciting journey as a couple, with their personal lives becoming increasingly intertwined. August was a pivotal month for these two, too. Channing Tatum showed his love and support by following various fan-run Instagram accounts dedicated to Zoë Kravitz. It wasn't long before their relationship made its way into the public eye. And hello, did you see that Brooklyn bike ride? It was clear this couple was meant-to-be kinda cute from the beginning!

Images via Theo Wargo/Getty Images/Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images for The Met Museum/Vogue

September 13, 2021 — Zoë Kravitz And Channing Tatum Make Their Red Carpet Debut

The couple made their debut — stepping up and out at the iconic Met Gala, a night filled with glamour and romance. Their joint appearance in multiple after party pictures confirmed their blossoming relationship to the world. Kravitz wore a sexy chain dress, while Tatum looked incredibly handsome in a black tux.

Image via Joe Maher/Getty Images

November 15, 2022 — Zoë Kravitz Calls Her Relationship With Channing Tatum "Sacred"

In a GQ interview, Zoë Kravitz opened up about her relationship with Tatum. She shared that they chose to keep their love story relatively low-key, wanting to keep it sacred and private for as long as possible. “He’s just a wonderful human," she says. "He makes me laugh and we both really love art and talking about art and the exploration of why we do what we do. We love to watch a film and break it down and talk about it and challenge each other."

“You want to keep it sacred and private as long as you can,” Kravitz continues. “So that you don’t have to even think about what the world thinks about it.”

Image via Jeff Spicer/Getty Images for Paramount Pictures

January 17, 2023 — Channing Tatum Says He's A "Monogamist"

Channing Tatum candidly discussed the early days of his relationship with Zoë Kravtiz in Vanity Fair, revealing they briefly lost touch before rekindling their connection on the set of P*ssy Island. He also opened up about his struggles in matters of the heart.

“Relationships are hard for me,” Channing says. “I am a bit of a monogamist...but heart things, when it comes to people I love, I have a really hard time. I end up trying too hard, you know?”

Image via Ilya S. Savenok/Getty Images for Kering

June 2023 — Zoë Kravitz And Channing Tatum Are Taking Things Slowly

Sources close to the couple revealed to US Weeklythat Zoë Kravitz and Channing Tatum were in no hurry to get engaged, as both had experienced failed marriages before. "They are perfectly happy with where things are and cherish [their] special relationship," the source says. "Having a baby is a very real possibility. But they enjoy taking things slowly."

Images via Emma McIntyre/Getty Images for Academy Museum of Motion Pictures/Amy Sussman/Getty Images

October 31, 2023 — Zoë Kravitz And Channing Tatum Are Engaged!

After a romantic date night in Paris during Fashion Week, Zoë Kravitz and Channing Tatum are getting married! In October, the lovebirds finally took the next step and got engaged, per PEOPLE, promising a future filled with love and adventure. YAY! We love love!

www.instagram.com

January 26, 2024 — Channing Tatum Supports Zoë Kravitz' New Movie

Channing recently took to Instagram to show his support of Zoë directing Blink Twice (formerly named P*ssy Island) and even shared a cute BTS video of them looking intently at a scene being filmed. "MISS DIRECTOR LADY HERSELF IN ACTION!!" he says in the caption. "ABSOLUTELY CRUSHING IT. CAN’T WAIT FOR YALL TO SEE."

Image via Ilya S. Savenok/Getty Images for Kering

March 4, 2024 — Zoë Kravitz And Channing Tatum Are Doing "Fantastic"

"Channing and Zoë are doing fantastic and could not be more in love," a source tells ET. "They’re so thrilled about their engagement and to be taking this next step together." The fact that *they're* excited about their engagement makes *me* even more excited for them!

August 9, 2024 — Zoë Kravitz And Channing Tatum Attend The Blink Twice Premiere

Look out world because Zoë Kravitz and Channing Tatum have officially stepped out on the red carpet together! They stunned in gorgeous, minimalistic black ensembles at the premiere of Blink Twice and made us wish we could've been specks of dust on what they were wearing.

Zoë wore a satin Saint Laurent dress and kept the rest of her look simple while Channing took dapper to the next level with a tailored black suit. Honestly, this is one sexy couple whose engagement rumors we hope are true.

Rodin Eckenroth/Getty Images

August 14, 2024 — Lenny Kravitz Is Excited For Zoë's Wedding

Fans may be surprised to know Zoë Kravtiz and Channing Tatum didn't know each other before she shared her idea for Blink Twice. Spending time together snowballed into the romantic relationship they have today, but wedding bells aren't ringing soon. Though her dad, Lenny Kravitz announced he's excited for the couple's wedding (via Entertainment Tonight), Zoë admitted that she and Channing have talked about it "in passing," (via Esquire).

Also, you might want to erase the image of Zoë being a mother from your brain because she doesn't think she'll be taking on that role. It's something she used to be scared to admit, but feels more comfortable talking about these days (via Esquire).

"There’s a lot of pressure on women to have children, and there’s a feeling that if you don’t, you don’t have purpose here. But this movie, it feels like I gave birth," she said.

October 29, 2024 — Zoë Kravitz And Channing Tatum Have Broken Up

Multiple sources told People that Channing Tatum and Zoë Kravitz have split after three years together, and called off their wedding. TMZ also confirmed the news. Check back here for statements from the actors.

​What are Channing Tatum & Zoë Kravitz ages?

Image via Gareth Cattermole/Getty Images

Channing Tatum was born on April 26, 1980, making him 43 years old. Zoë Kravitz (who's 35 years old) was born on December 1, 1988, so there's an 8-year age gap between the two.

Looking for more celeb news? Be sure to sign up for our email newsletter and if you love Zoë Kravitz and Channing Tatum's relationship, check out the latest news on Tom Holland And Zendaya and Taylor Swift And Travis Kelce!

Header image via Rodin Eckenroth/Getty Images

This post has been updated.

We live in a "post your relationship so we know it's real" landscape, and I'd be lying if I said it hasn't made me wonder if there's a larger conversation to be had about it. Some people don't feel the need to post their romantic partner while others share their relationships in a way that rivals the best celebrity couples.

Everyone's different, but it's not not unheard of to question your partner's devotion if they're not posting you on Instagram. You may feel justified in your anger because "so and so" are always in cute pictures and videos together on social media — but are your feelings valid? The best person to answer this is licensed therapist Suzette Bray, LMFT. She has over 25 years of specializing in Dialectical Behavior Therapy, and she's seen this topic come up plenty of times during sessions with clients, so grab a pen and paper to take notes!

Why do people want to share their relationship status with others?

Afif Ramdhasuma

My sister used to ask me this question when I was in my 20's, and I always looked at her like she had two heads growing. I couldn't fathom the idea that people wouldn't want to talk about their relationship online because it felt like everyone was doing it. I mean, a study from Pew Research Center shows 8 in 10 people on social media see relationship posts, so it clearly wasn't outrageous to think it was normal.

But, that still doesn't answer why people are drawn to sharing cute little updates about their partner or relationship. Luckily, Bray has a good indication of what drives people to give others a sneak peek into their lives. "People share their relationship status for all kinds of reasons. Some want to mark their territory — nothing says 'back off' quite like a cute couple selfie! Others are just excited and proud of their partner and want to share the joy," she says. That stems from people's "need for a sense of belonging or to receive positive reinforcement from others," she adds.

But, this doesn't necessarily make people weird. It's just human nature that makes us act the way we do. "We as humans are just hard wired to seek connection, and broadcasting our connections, makes us feel more accepted and secure in our social lives."

Should couples have conversations about their social media expectations?

Katrin Bolovtsova

I don't care how hot you think someone is, you're going to have to learn how to communicate with them. It's true even if your chemistry is off-the-charts because healthy relationships don't fall out of the sky. They're built via honesty, respect, forgiveness, and other important factors.

Before assuming your partner is or isn't okay with you posting about your relationship, Bray is 100% convinced you should talk things through. "Social media is still in the wild west of relationship etiquette, and without discussions, assumptions about 'correct' behavior can run wild," she hints. For example, you could be happily posting about your partner only for someone to point out that they're not following you on social media.

"Some people are super private, while others practically live their lives online. Misunderstandings happen when expectations aren't laid out so talking about it can prevent messiness in the long run," Bray observes.

If two people have gone on a couple of dates, should one of them be upset if the other isn't publicly talking about them?

RDNE Stock project

So, you swiped right on Tinder or Bumble, and you had a few amazing dates with one of your matches. Before you start publicly declaring your love for them, Bray wants you to reconsider. "Hold on! It's just a few dates! Let’s pump the brakes. The early stages of dating is not the time to make grand social declarations," she declares. As someone who tried to 'date' people from Tinder, those first few dates aren't a guarantee that you've found the love of your life.

"Posting someone on social media can feel like a big step to some people so expecting that level of public commitment too soon might be too much pressure. If you’re already thinking, 'Why haven’t they posted about me yet?' after two dates, it might be a good time to check in with yourself about where those expectations are coming from," advises Bray.

I've recovered from my former, "Is he the one" obsession so also take it from me — see where things go first and then refer back to question #2!

Is it a red flag if someone doesn't post their partner on social media?

Budgeron Bach

It would be so much fun if we personally had Dustin Poynter, the flag guy, from TikTok helping point us in the right direction — but this is one of those things that errs on the subjective side. Though Bray doesn't feel it's necessarily healthier to keep your relationship private, she thinks "context matters." "Some people are just more private or feel weird about social media in general," she says.

But, that doesn't mean certain behaviors don't warrant a few eyebrow raises. She notes," If someone is super active on social—like posting about their dog’s morning routine and every cupcake they’ve ever had—but doesn't ever mention their partner, it could create a need for a deeper conversation." Before you feel justified about grilling your partner — as satisfactory as that may feel — take a second to breathe.

Bray would prefer you work to understand "why they don't post, rather than assuming your partner is keep you a secret." If you discover the latter to be true, follow your instincts and let that person go because you don't deserve that!

Do you think it's healthier for couples to keep certain aspects of their relationship private?

Fábio Carvalho

Everyone has a different view of what makes a romantic relationship healthy, so this is one of those things Bray says, "absolutely depends on the couple" because some "genuinely enjoy sharing their lives online." You've probably seen your share of couples who make cute content together whether they're married or not. I'd be lying if I said I don't specifically keep up with a few whose content makes me smile.

But, other couples may not be interested in sharing their relationship online because they "want to be private and keep the relationship free from the judgements or opinions of others," according to Bray. That's not to say they have something to hide, though. Instead, think of it as a personal preference.

"As long as both partners are on the same page and it’s not a source of tension, it’s all about finding the balance that works for them. If it starts to feel like a performance for likes rather than genuine connection, though, that’s where it can become problematic," Bray reminds.

How can someone bring up their partner's posting habits without sounding accusatory?

Timur Weber

You may feel eager about posting about your partner while they're less enthusiastic and this could make you feel upset. It's easy to jump to conclusions when you're already upset, but Bray feels "tone is everything." Ironically, she suggests something I've heard in therapy sessions and that's "to be curious, not confrontational." Hopefully this stopped you in your tracks if you were ready to give your partner a piece of your mind.

"You can say something like, 'Hey, I’ve noticed we haven’t shared much about each other on social media? What’s your take on sharing stuff about us online?' It’s important to frame it as a mutual exploration of rather than a demand for a public declaration," Bray points out.

What would you tell someone who wants to emulate couples who consistently post content together?

Vlada Karpovich

We've all seen couples who we think have the cutest relationship, even though we've never met them before. As much as you may admire a couple, Bray thinks it's a "slipper slope" if you want to try to recreate their online moments. "I’d encourage someone to focus more on what makes their own relationship feel fulfilling, rather than chasing #couplesgoals," she encourages.

However, this isn't a sign that you're not supposed to ever share anything about your partner or relationship! "If posting together feels fun and real, go for it! But if it starts feeling like a performance or that you are in competition with other couples, it's probably good to take a step back," she warns.

Also, keep in mind that social media doesn't show you every single moment of couples' lives so don't worry about trying to look picture perfect based on a 30 second to 30 minute video.

If you feel that your partner doesn't post you enough on social media, talk to them before launching into an angsty rant because your assumptions might not always be right. I wish someone would've shared this advice 10 years ago, but all that matters is knowing you don't have to let being upset about your partner's lack of relationship posts be the reason your day is ruined.

The problem arises when your partner doesn't seem receptive to talking about your concerns because dismissive or evasive attitudes are a no-no!

We have more relationship advice if you're looking for more romantic tips and tricks!

If neutrals aren’t your thing — or you’re ready to refresh your space — earthy accents are the perfect way to bring warmth and character into your home. Colors like chocolate and caramel, earthy greens, Bordeaux, and burgundy are making our neutral rooms a little richer and less monotone. Here’s how to create a modern earthy-neutral aesthetic that feels fresh, grounded, and cozy for a new season.

How To Create An Earthy-Neutral Aesthetic

Design: Allprace | Photography by Michael P.H. Clifford

  1. Layer textures: Mix natural materials like woven jute, natural fiber linens, and rustic ceramics to create a cozy, layered look. The more textures, the richer the effect!
  2. Choose warm neutrals: Instead of stark whites or cool grays, go for warm tones like sandy beige, terracotta, and clay that give you an organic, lived-in feel.
  3. Add greenery: Everything is better with plants. Bring in indoor trees, succulents, and hanging plants to accentuate that earthy vibe.
  4. Mix in wood and stone: These materials instantly ground a space. Think raw wood furniture or stone accents to capture an earthy, timeless vibe.
  5. Use earth-toned accents: From throw pillows to wall art, shop for decor in muted browns, greens, and rusty reds that echo the colors of nature.

Schoolhouse

Schoolhouse x Clare V. Felix Shag Wool Rug

This collab between two of our favorite brands created a cozy graphic rug for the living room or dining room in the season's earthy palette. Love!

Quince

Quince European Linen Duvet Cover Set

Available in a mix of colors, this European flax linen duvet cover is pre-washed so it's super soft for a more lived-in vibe.

Etsy

Etsy Terra Cotta Flatwoven Kilim Rug

Clay colors are having a moment this season, and this 100% cotton kilim rug is the perfect accent to your fall decor.

Anthroplogie

Anthropologie Cozy Cocoon Fringed Throw Blanket

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Our favorite murder mystery is returning for another season! Only Murders in the Building, which stars Steve Martin, Martin Short, and Selena Gomez, is Hulu's most-watched original comedy — and season three was the platform's most-streamed original project this year. It looks like Arconiacs really DO want more because Only Murders in the Building season 4 is here — and that finale is CRAZY. Here's everything we know about the upcoming installment of the show, and don't forget to read our interview with costumer Dana Covarrubias! After you've rewatched seasons 1-3 (again), check out The Best New TV Shows Coming In 2024for more!

What happened at the end of Only Murders in the Building season 4?

Patrick Harbron/Disney

After learning Marshall is Sazz's killer, Mabel, Charles, and Oliver are almost his next victims before Jan shoots him in the back from the empty apartment across the courtyard. But the season 4 finale isn't all drama! Oliver and Loretta finally tie the knot, and Oliver decides to stay in NYC while Loretta has to film in New Zealand. But in the final moments of the episode, we see that Lester is our next murder victim. HOW COULD YOU HULU?!

Tune into Only Murders season 5 to unmask the killer!

Does Selena Gomez like Steve Martin and Martin Short?

Selena Gomez/Instagram

Yes, Selena Gomez, Steve Martin, and Martin Short are all close! While presenting the award for Best Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series, Selena Gomez and Martin Short had a moment onstage that totally reminded me of Oliver and Mabel. While making their way to the mic, Selena had to jog to keep up with Martin and Steve (she was wearing a stunning Ralph Lauren dress, after all). And when she expresses some nerves about tripping, Martin grabs her arm and says, "I got you baby." The sweetest!!

And Selena shows just as much love to her iconic costars. "I want to thank @stevemartinreally and Marty (who hates social media) for truly being the most kind, gentle, warm and powerful influences in my life," Selena Gomez says on Instagram. "You have shown me a level of class, intellect and humor that doesn’t seem to be easy to find anymore. You guys are truly best friends to me forever." I love this trio so much!

When is the next season of Only Murders in the Building coming out?

Image via Selena Gomez/Instagram

Only Murders in the Building season 4 is coming to Hulu Tuesday August 27, 2024. That means we're getting the Olympics, Bridgerton, The Bear, Emily in Paris, and House of the Dragon all in one summer. WOW.

Selena Gomez posted a screenshot on March 1 announcing that filming had begun! In honor of Day 1, Martin Short and Steve Martin sent her a bouquet of flowers with a note that reads, "We're so happy to be back with you, love, Steve and Marty." Okay cute!!

What is the Only Murders In The Building Season 4 filming like?

Image via Only Murders/Instagram

The official Only Murders in the Building Instagram account shared the first shot from set, and we couldn't be happier to see our favorite trio! "The besties are back," the post reads. "Season 4 🎥." And it looks like the costume color palette is still shades of green, blue, and red like in previous seasons, with Steve Martin's Charles wearing blue slacks and green shoes, and Martin Short's Oliver wearing rust-colored pants. Selena Gomez' Mabel is sticking to neutrals for now, but I'm sure we'll see plenty of color in her wardrobe in the weeks to come!

Selena Gomez also revealed to The Hollywood Reporter that shooting season 4 was a blast. "This is our most exciting season yet. That’s what I would definitely say with confidence, because it was far too fun," she says. "It’s going to be, to date, probably my favorite season."

But Only Murders in the Building season 4 also came with its own challenges. "We used to shoot everything in order, and that would help me a lot," she continues, "but because we had so many different things that were happening, and we wanted to make sure everybody was comfortable and we could adjust to people’s schedules, it jumped all over the place [this season]."

Who's going to be in the Only Murders in the Building season 4 cast?

Image via Patrick Harbron/Hulu

Unfortunately, Mabel and Tobert won't reunite for Only Murders season 4 because actor Jesse Williams just confirmed with People he's not returning for the series with a very straightforward, "I'm not on that show anymore."

Selena Gomez, Martin Short, and Steve Martin will return to lead Only Murders in the Building season 4. We'll also see Meryl Streep return alongside newcomers Eugene Levy, Eva Longoria, Kumail Nanjiani, Desmin Borges, Siena Werber, Lilian Rebelo, and White Lotus star Molly Shannon. While we don't have any info on Eugene and Eva's role, we'll see Molly as a "high-powered Los Angeles business woman who finds herself drawn into the world of the investigation in New York,” via Variety.

As someone who was head over heels obsessed with Cheaper By The Dozen 2 as a kid, I can't wait to see Eugene Levy and Steve Martin onscreen again!

What is Only Murders in the Building season 4 about?

Image via Patrick Harbron/Hulu

"I think the idea of what you create is a thing you put out to the world, and sometimes you can’t be prepared for the repercussions of what potentially the world does with your thing," showrunner John Hoffman tells The Hollywood Reporter. "So, the podcast and everything else that’s happened, and what it all means, and what it could have been meaning all along."

We've seen the way Mabel, Oliver, and Charles' podcast has catapulted them into danger and adventure in the last three seasons, and it sounds like Only Murders in the Building season 4 will focus even more on the repercussions of their podcast — and it's going to happen in Los Angeles.

"Well, I’m very excited to see Steve, Martin and Selena take a little break from the apartment building and come to Los Angeles," ABC boss Craig Erwich tells Deadline. "So in the same way that John Hoffman used the canvas of Broadway to tell [Only Murders season 3], the same unique Only Murders take will be applied to Los Angeles, which I’m really excited about."

How many episodes of Only Murders In The Building on Hulu are there?

Image via Patrick Harbron/Hulu

All three seasons of Only Murders in the Building have 10 episodes each. We're definitely going to binge watch all 30 multiple times before season 4 comes out!

Who dies at the end of season 3 of Only Murders in the Building?

Image via Patrick Harbron/Hulu

At the very end of Only Murders season 3, we see Sazz (played by Jane Lynch) get shot while walking around Charles' apartment — and then try to write him a message with her own blood. Crazy! But even crazier is the fact she was dressed up like him, meaning the murderer was actually after Charles. But the great thing about Only Murders in the Building is that the victim becomes an even larger part of the story than they were before.

"The more personal you can make the victim to one of our trio, or the murderer to one of our trio, the better," showrunner John Hoffman tells THR. "It felt like a perfect opportunity to let Charles have this connection and explore more of that connection. It’s one of the great characters. We’ve loved writing Sazz so much, and that’s the beauty of the show is, you get a lot more time with the victims. They’re not gone when some ill fate happens to them."

Where is the Arconia in New York?

Image via Patrick Harbron/Hulu

In real life, the Arconia is the The Belnord Apartments. The building takes up an entire city block, and the Italian Renaissance Revival style it was made in is absolutely beautiful. You can see the outside of the building in New York City's west 86th street, but since it's a real apartment building, you won't be able to go inside!

How did they get Sting to be in Only Murders in the Building?

Image via Craig Blakenhorn/Hulu

Sting was a guest star in the first season of Only Murders in the Building thanks to his friendship with Steve Martin and casting director Bernard Telsey! That's also how Meryl Streep (who's also friends with Steve Martin and Martin Short) got to be a part of season 3.

Where can I watch Only Murders in the Building?

Image via Patrick Harbron/Hulu

You can watch the Emmy-nominatedOnly Murders in the Building on Hulu now!

Where did the inspiration for the costumes come from?

Image via Patrick Harbron/Hulu

In our interview with costume designer Dana Covarrubias, she mentioned how much her and Selena Gomez' Mexican heritage influenced her outfits in season one, while the aesthetics of The Hardy Boys and Alfred Hitchcock's films influenced her looks in season two.

"I was trying to figure out something within that [murder mystery] world again, but our whole season is about Broadway and about theatre, and I think that just trumped everything else," she says. "It was very exciting to re-explore some of my favorite musicals...Almost all of Mabel's costumes this season are directly inspired by one or two musicals."

We're talking Guys and Dolls, Chicago, and Little Shop of Horrors. Check back here for the season four costume inspo!

Will there be a season 4 of Only Murders in the Building?

Image via Patrick Harbron/Hulu

Yes, Only Murders in the Building season 4 is confirmed! The official Instagram announcement post features our favorite trio against a vivid green backdrop. Selena Gomez stuns in a bright red sweater dress with a cold shoulder silhouette, while Martin Short wears a blue suit and Steve Martin wears purple. This definitely feels like a nod to the Only Murders in the Building costumes — Selena's Mabel wears a lot of marigold and red, while Steve's Charles started off the show in blue and Martin's Oliver chose shades of purple.

Are you excited for Only Murders In The Building Season 4? Check out our email newsletter for more pop culture news!

Lead image via Patrick Harbron/Hulu

This post has been updated.