An Ode to My Freshman Year Roommate, and an Overdue Apology for That Diary Entry

1. Listen without judging if your friend reveals an ongoing argument about a family will

Being a good listener is one of the most basic — and yet most important — things you can do as a friend 365 days of the year, but when tensions run high near the holidays, those listening skills become all the more crucial. You might even consider resisting the urge to speak, like, at all. “Be a good listener and don’t give advice,” licensed marriage and family therapist Katie Ziskind says. “Supporting someone doesn’t mean that you have to fix their problem. Instead, truly being supportive means giving a hug when someone is crying and being a caring friend.”

2. Prep your pal to expect drama if your uncle's invited his new girlfriend and ex to dinner

Rather than reassuring your friend that things at family celebrations may not be as bad as they fear, trust what they know about the situation and help them wrap their head around what’s to come. This should minimize the stress for them in the long run. “If you expect it and it happens, situation normal,” certified life coach Susan Golicic tells us. “If you expect it and it doesn’t, well, then, a bonus!”

3. Help your bestie make a plan in case their fight-or-flight mode gets triggered

Going into any situation with a plan almost always feels better than going in unprepared. Per writer, speaker, and healing expert Alisa Zipursky, a helpful plan might include specific check-in times, a code word that indicates your friend needs extra support, and ideas for creating healthy boundaries with family members who make them feel especially triggered. “The idea is to make asking for help as easy as possible,” Zipursky says. “Making sure a proactive plan is in place well before someone enters the stressful situation can help relieve some of the anticipatory anxiety.”

4. Check in often by sending your friend periodic texts 

Licensed counselor Maria Inoa recommends that you prioritize regular touch-base texts over the course of whatever event is causing your friend the most stress. It’s not about solving the conflicts or taking away their pain. Instead, you can focus on offering gentle reminders that you are thinking of them and are available if they need you.

5. Create a new tradition that revolves around you and and your bestie's favorite Christmas movies

If your friend’s family holiday celebrations don’t exactly inspire positive feelings about the occasion, why not help them establish some better associations? Licensed clinical professional counselor Anna Poss suggests planning a “low-stress, fun way to celebrate with each other before or after the actual holiday.” Get a seasonal movie night or cookie swap on the calendar before everyone leaves town to hang with family. Those cozy vibes may help dull the negative, anxious feelings.

6. Write down words of affirmations for them to look at

Grab some pretty stationery and put your love and support on paper for your BFF. “In the note, remind her how strong, courageous, and capable she is,” licensed psychotherapist and life coach Diane Petrella says. “Let her know how much you love and admire her and how grateful you are for her friendship. Write whatever you think your friend needs to hear to feel supported, grounded, and loved.” Remind her to hide the note in her pocket or bag so she can read it whenever she needs a little extra TLC over the course of the holidays. You can even go one step further and send them home with a care package, per therapistShannon Thomas.

7. Invite your friend to your family celebration

If things have gotten so bad with your bestie’s family that she wants to steer clear of their celebrations entirely, you may want to invite her to join you and your crew instead. Even if she opts to decline your invitation, it will mean a lot to her to know that she has choices. If your friend does take you up on the offer, Mountainside Treatment Center‘s family wellness manager Tina Muller recommends that you try to incorporate some of her favorite traditions into your holiday schedule.

8. Keep your phone nearby if your friend needs to talk about everything that happened

“Before an event with possible family issues even happens, schedule a time not long after to see the friend,” marriage and family therapist Sarah Epstein suggests. “Now you’ve become the light at the end of the tunnel for them.” Be prepared to be a listening ear over dinner or a workout session so your pal can vent about everything that’s gone on and (hopefully) be ready to move on from there.

Don't Fall For "Perfect Families" On Social Media

The first VERY important step to having a joyous holiday season when you're going it alone is to stop believing the narrative that others' family situations are perfect, Eichler says.

"Remember people only post a moment in time, and only the moments when they look their happiest and best."

In addition to the fact that everything you see on social media is curated for the 'gram, it's also important to remember that by focusing on what others have and you lack, you risk failing to see the great things at play in your own life.

"These holiday periods can become a time of focusing on who and what we don't have, rather than who or what we do, and can cause a negative spiral into depressing and dreadful feelings of inadequacy," says Eichler.

Gratitude is the reason for the season, after all. So instead of only seeing the negative, try some gratitude journal prompts to help you focus on what's actually really wonderful about your life right now.

Make An Effort To Deepen New Connections

While it may seem like everyone has friends and family to spend time with during the holiday season, that doesn't mean no one is available for deepening a blossoming relationship or new friendship.

"Make a list of people you can or would like to connect with, and try to reach out to at least one of them," advises Eichler.

Reaching out doesn't have to mean a big plan or an hour-long conversation. Even a quick text letting a friendly coworker know you're thinking about them can go a long way toward deepening the relationship and moving it in the direction of closer friendship.

Don't have an acquaintance in mind? Then it's time to make new acquaintances. What's more in line with the Christmas spirit than attending a Meetup or event full of people eager to make new friends?

"Join groups with similar interests to yours, such as hiking, baking, or games. Push your boundaries and be brave - you might find new people who have much in common with you."

Give Back

The holiday season is a great time to focus on giving back to your community, and coincidentally, acts of generosity and kindness are known to reduce loneliness and help people feel happier. One study found that knowing a few of your neighbors and doing small acts of kindness for them — such as cheering them up, listening to them, mowing their lawn, providing advice about local business recommendations and job opportunities, and chatting over the fence — was statistically correlated with feeling less lonely and having a lower risk of depression.

Helping out elderly neighbors can be a particularly gratifying way to give back.

"Notice older lonely people in your neighborhood or community who might have no family at all, and offer to help them," says Eichler. "These can become mutually meaningful connections, and help you 'adopt' a grandparent."

Connect With Others Online

Finally, use the Internet for its highest and best purpose: to connect people. Whether you're using Meetup to find in-person events, digital forums for having conversations about special interests, or programs like Circle for getting support from others in your situation, the opportunities to create new connections are practically endless.

"There are many interest groups that can be found digitally, where or any person can connect with others in the same life stage, going through the same challenges, or who would like to explore the same interests," Eichler states. "Meaningful connections can be formed easily in these circumstances. The Internet enables us to find and connect to people all over the world who fit this, and to whom we can become more easily attached, as we are able to find people with the exact interests that energize us."

Is Mamma Mia 3 happening?

Yes, Mamma Mia 3 is in its early planning stages! Christine Baranski just told The Hollywood Reporter that she's met with producer Judy Kramer, and that Kramer has plans for the third movie. "She gave me the narrative plotline of how it’s going to happen," Baranski says. "That’s all I can say! But, it’s not like, 'Oh, I wish it could happen!' Judy Kramer makes things happen. She made number two happen, and it was a phenomenal hit. I wouldn’t put it past Judy Kramer to get everybody back together."

A third installation was first mentioned way back in 2020, during a Collider interview with Mamma Mia! star Amanda Seyfried. Seyfried said she was on board — and at the time, she thought the rest of the star-studded cast would be too.

"Listen, every single person in that movie would say yes in a heartbeat because we want to hang out with each other," Seyfried told Collider at the time. "That's what we talked about last time, like did we ever think that we'd end up here again on an Island in Croatia?"

When will Mamma Mia 3 come out?

We don't have an official answer about when to expect this highly anticipated sequel. The project is in the "earliest stages," according to creator and producer, Judy Craymer. Cher also revealed to Entertainment Weekly that everyone is "talking about it," but she doesn't "know when they're going to do it."

Has casting information been shared about Mamma Mia 3?

While nothing's been made official, Amanda Seyfried just said something that made my heart skip a beat. She told ABC News she loves Sabrina Carpenter's music and dropped this admission: "If Sabrina Carpenter wants to play my daughter, I’ll make it happen."

But before she admitted that, the actress said something else that made me raise my eyebrows. "Everybody says it’s gonna happen, but I mean, I haven’t seen a script."

Cher is also eager to return to the beloved franchise and is rooting for Meryl to make an appearance again. "I keep saying, 'Meryl, you've got to come back,'" she said (via Entertainment Weekly). She also said she's told her, "'It'll be fun. You'll have a good time. You'll be able to sing.'"

I don't know what it'll take, but hope someone gets a script in Amanda Seyfried, Cher, and Meryl Streep's hands ASAP!

What is the first Mamma Mia about?

The first film follows Donna (Streep) and Sophie (Seyfried) as mother and daughter living on a remote Greek island. When Sophie is about to marry Sky (Dominic Cooper), she sets out to learn who her real father is after discovering it could be one of three men (played by Pierce Brosnan, Stellan Skarsgard, and Colin Firth).

Who does the second Mamma Mia follow?

Mamma Mia 2takes viewers back to 1979, where young Donna (Lily James) embarks on a series of adventures throughout Europe following her Oxford University graduation. On her journeys, she makes the acquaintances of Harry, Bill and Sam – the latter whom she falls in love with. In the present day, pregnant Sophie dreams of renovating a taverna while reuniting with her mother's old friends and boyfriends on a Greek island island.