The New Olivia Rodrigo "Guts" Music Video Is "The Summer I Turned Pretty" Meets "Wednesday"

olivia rodrigo guts

Olivia Rodrigo's Guts is the sonic equivalent of a no-holds-barred burn book, its pages crying out to be plastered on lockers and bathroom walls, to be seen by everyone. This sophomore album is even more relatable than the singer's first, and seamlessly touches on every half-written, heartbroken rant lying dormant in our notes app, transforming them into electrifying lyrics you can't help but belt.

Unlike its predecessor, Sour (the 2021 chart-topper that truly launched Rodrigo from High School Musical star to global sensation), Guts delves deep into the duality of heartbreak — and the existentialism we all feel, no matter our age. "It's SO GOOD, social lead Mallory Levy said after the drop. "I'm not in this age group but I feel [their experience] and am instantly transported. The perfect mix of Taylor [Swift]-level lyrics + Paramore-level angst that I never knew I needed."

Y2K-inspired pop punk guitars echo throughout the album, adding an extra layer of intensity to Rodrigo’s rage-fueled confessions. Guts undeniably provides the soundtrack to those earth-shattering breakups that propel every girl into womanhood, those gut-wrenching moments when it's hard to let go, even when you know it’s for the best. It’s a collection of anthems for identity crises, and a musical odyssey through female fury and adolescent heartbreak.

Is there a music video for Obsessed by Olivia Rodrigo?

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Olivia Rodrigo - obsessed (Official Music Video)

Yes, the "Obsessed" music video debuted on March 22, and it's giving major Wednesday and The Summer I Turned Prettyvibes! The song is all about being, well, obsessed with your partner's ex. You can just *feel* Olivia's anxiety through the lyrics. And the music video is a super fun take on a beauty pageant/cotillion situation, with all of her partner's exes prepping to compete against each other. While all the other women are in white, Olivia wears an edgy black dress Wednesday Addams would approve of, with her socks adding Guts' signature red to the outfit.

Is there a deluxe version of GUTS?

Image via Jason Kempin/Getty Images for ABA

Yes, during her Oliva Rodrigo's tour, the singer announced the Guts deluxe edition, which she's calling Guts (Spilled)! The new edition will be released Friday, March 22. In addition to the songs we already have from the original album, Olivia Rodrigo is releasing the fan-favorite “Obsessed,” as well as “Girl I’ve Always Been,” “Scared of My Guitar,” “So American,” and “Stranger.”

What song did Olivia Rodrigo sing at the Grammys?

Image via Kevin Winter/Getty Images for The Recording Academy

At the 2024 Grammys, Olivia Rodrigo sang "Vampire" in a red silk dress. The purple virtual background featured some red flowers, but as Olivia sang, the flowers started to bleed. And the longer the song went on, the gorier the scene got (including some fake blood makeup Olivia smeared on her face). I love this approach to the "Vampire" music video because it captures its chaotic energy but feels much more sophisticated. Plus Olivia sounded amazing!!

Ranking Every Track On Olivia Rodrigo's "Guts," A Nearly Impossible Task

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Olivia Rodrigo - vampire (Official Video)

Making The Bed

Most Relatable Lyric: “Every good thing has turned into somethin' I dread // And I'm playin' the victim so well in my head”

Now that dreaming about fortune and fame is in Rodrigo’s rearview, "Making The Bed" walks us through the bittersweet reality of getting everything you’ve ever wanted. After all, we can probably all relate to putting our desires on a pedestal and then feeling confused when the reality of those dreams isn't what we expected.

Vampire

Most relatable lyric: "I tried you help you out, now I know that I can't // 'Cause how you think's the kind of thing I'll never understand."

What could be considered the only power ballad on the album, the lyrics in "Vampire" remind us of the “Driver's License"-esque emotions we’ve come to love (and expect) from Rodrigo. She's proven she can fuse anger and regret while still empowering listeners, and "vampire" sinks its teeth in, a theatrical roller-coaster ride worth the repeat.

Lacy

Most relatable lyric: "I feel your compliments like bullеts on skin // Dazzling starlet, Bardot reincarnate // Wеll, aren't you the greatest thing to ever exist?"

Reminiscent of classic green-eyed songs before it, like Dolly Parton’s “Jolene,” "Lacy" is a portrait of the other woman. Rodrigo doesn’t outright beg Lacy not to steal her man, but instead details her own flaws through Lacy’s perceived perfections. For Rodrigo, “lacy” is but a characterization of unrealistic expectations that she’s made real.

Ballad Of A Homeschooled Girl

Most relatable lyric: "Everythin' I do is tragic // Every guy I like is gay // The morning after I panic // Oh, God, what did I say?"

Rodrigo reckons with her fear of being seen and of saying the right things. From constantly missing social cues to speaking just to have something to say, "Ballad Of A Homeschooled Girl" mirrors the life of a girl who spends her time twiddling her thumbs one minute and over-analyzing literally everything the next. SO RELATABLE.

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Olivia Rodrigo - bad idea right? (Official Video)

All-American B*tch

Most relatable lyric: ”And I am built like a mother and a total machine // I feel for your every little issue, I know just what you mean”

Leading the already iconic tracklist, "All-American B*tch" foreshadows the growing pains and base level of dissatisfaction young women often endure. Caring so much about other people who don't return the favor — even when you wish you didn't — can be really uncomfortable, and whether you're shouldering the emotional baggage of an unattached partner or struggling to maintain the cool girl image, "All-American B*tch" hits the nail on the head.

Bad Idea Right?

Most relatable lyric: ”And I'm sure I've seen much hotter men // But I really can't remember when”

If the saying “rose-colored glasses” existed as a lyric, this would be it. In her second single following “Vampire,” Rodrigo falls into the trap of reconnecting with her ex. “Bad idea right?” It’s a tale as old as time. Do we really need to explain more?

The Grudge

Most relatable lyric: “We both drew blood, but, man, those cuts were never equal // I try to be tough, I try to be mean // But even after all this, you're still everything to me”

Seeing the end of any relationship that once meant a lot to you is so, so painful — especially when you still care about the person. Grudges usually have a purely negative connotation, and we love to see how Rodrigo emphasizes how her grudge is one of love as much as it is hate, making it extra bittersweet.

Logical

Most relatable lyric: "Said I was too young, I was too soft // Can't take a joke, can't get you off"

"Logical" is for every woman who has ever been infantilized by someone she adored. Gaslighters beware. Rodrigo’s merry-go-round storytelling highlights the emotional tension between the love she felt for her ex and their emotional manipulation.

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Olivia Rodrigo - get him back! (Live From The Today Show / 2023)

Get Him Back!

Most relatable lyric: "I wanna kiss his face with an uppercut // I wanna meet his mom and tell her her son sucks!"

This song bares the consequences of not immediately hitting the block button when your ex calls. While some of the slower songs on Guts highlight the way love and regret coexist, “Get Him Back!” takes a more upbeat, funny approach that also touches on Rodrigo's frustration.

Love Is Embarrassing

Most relatable lyric: “God, love's f*ckin' embarrassin'”

Another running theme throughout Olivia Rodrigo's Guts? Confusion. But instead of just talking about a partner, Rodrigo's confusion in "Love Is Embarrassing" is also directed towards the nature of romance itself, as well as the lengths we're willing to go for people we tell ourselves we shouldn't care about. In short: yes, love is very embarrassin'.

Pretty Isn't Pretty

Most relatable lyric: "I could change up my body and change up my face // I could try every lipstick in every shade // But I'd always feel the same // 'Cause pretty isn't pretty enough anyway"

Social media, photo editing, and the like have taken a serious toll on the way we see ourselves (after all comparing yourself to the people you see on social media can literally make you more unhappy with your appearance). In what feels like an indirect sequel to Sour's "Jealousy, Jealousy," "Pretty Isn't Pretty" is a reminder that external beauty isn't the end-all-be-all.

Teenage Dream

Most relatable lyric: "When am I gonna stop being a pretty young thing to guys? // When am I gonna stop being great for my age and just start being good? // When will it stop being cool to be quietly misunderstood?"

Rodrigo comes out swinging on Guts' finale (the title of which calls back to a lyric from Sour's opening number "Brutal"). She worries that her glory days are already behind her, and like so many of us, craves to be known, chosen, and loved for exactly who she is — and not for her talent, or her looks, or her brain — whether or not that makes her the ultimate "teenage dream."

What songs are on Guts?

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We first got the Guts tracklist thanks to an Instagram video:

  1. "All American B*tch"
  2. "Bad Idea Right"
  3. "Vampire"
  4. "Lacy"
  5. "Ballad of a Homeschooled Girl"
  6. "Making The Bed"
  7. "Logical"
  8. "Get Him Back"
  9. "Love Is Embarrassing"
  10. "The Grudge"
  11. "Pretty Isn't Pretty"
  12. "Teenage Dream"

Are there any music videos?

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Olivia Rodrigo - vampire (Official Video)

Yes! We've gotten three music videos so far: "Vampire," "Bad Idea Right?," and "Get Him Back!" The "Vampire" music video emphasizes the scrutiny Olivia Rodrigo feels in the spotlight.

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Olivia Rodrigo - bad idea right? (Official Video)

The "Bad Idea Right?" music video totally feels like a scene out of Euphoria — which helps highlight how youthful and chaotic the song actually is.

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Olivia Rodrigo - get him back! (Official Video)

The music video for "Get Him Back!" is genius for one reason: by adding multiple Olivia's throughout the video, she highlights how it feels like there are multiple versions of herself because of how many different things she wants.

When did Guts come out?

Image via Olivia Rodrigo/Geffen Records

Olivia Rodrigo's Guts dropped on September 8 and we cannot tell you how many time we've listened to the whole thing.

When did Vampire come out?

"Vampire" began streaming on all music platforms June 30, while the follow-up single "bad idea right?" was released on August 10.

Who is Olivia Rodrigo?

Image via Emma McIntyre / Staff

Olivia Rodrigo, 20, rose to fame during her role as Nini on High School Musical: The Musical: The Series. A talented singer and actress, Rodrigo was launched into the public spotlight thanks to Sour and fans' speculation that it touched on a suspected love triangle between her, her (now ex) BF and HSMTMTS co-star Joshua Bassett and singer Sabrina Carpenter.

While the public has (mostly) moved on from the rumors, Rodrigo’s talent shined and the singer sent TikTok spiraling with the release of “Driver's License,” followed by Sour in 2021.

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Olivia Rodrigo - drivers license (Live From Saturday Night Live/2021)

Today, the three-time Grammy winner is besties with pop culture power players Iris Apatow, Conan Grey, Billie Eilish, Selena Gomez, Taylor Swift, Charlie D’Amelio, Maddie Ziegler, and more. She's also shared the stage with celebrity icons such as Avril Lavigne, Paris Hilton, and Billy Joel.

What are your thoughts on Olivia Rodrigo's Guts? Stay updated on all of the latest music releases with Brit + Co.

Lead image Mike Coppola/Getty Images for Spotify

This post has been updated, with former reporting done by Olivia Taylor and Kaitlyn Ingram.

No matter how many times I rewatch The Vampire Diaries, there's nothing like seeing a cast reunion — and the weekend of December 6, we finally got to see our three favorite Mystic Falls gals together again! Nina Dobrev, Kat Graham, and Candice King were just some of The Vampire Diaries cast members who reunited for Epic Con to chat all things Elena, Bonnie, and Caroline...but things took a turn in the middle of the interview when one of the backdrops almost fell on Nina!

Keep reading to see what happened during The Vampire Diaries cast reunion with Nina Dobrev, Kat Graham, and Candice King.

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Even after all these years, Bonnie and Caroline are still saving Elena #tvd #thevampirediaries #ninadobrev #candiceking #katgraham #elanagilbert #carolineforbes #bonniebennett #epiccons

As someone who's done plenty of interviews myself, I know how fast a situation can spiral — and this interview accident is crazy. While talking on stage about the show, one of the backdrops begins to lean forward, and right before it falls on top of Nina, Candice and Kat quickly move to push it in the opposite direction.

"I don't want to see any 'Bonnie saves the day' memes," Kat jokes, referencing the fandom's love for Bonnie consistently helping the group throughout the show's eight-season run. "I don't want to see it, I don't want to hear it!" You can also see a relieved Nina hug Candice before revealing she thought it was a spider!

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In addition to this "Bonnie saves the day" moment (sorry, Kat, I couldn't help it!), the internet went crazy when Nina posted a video of her, Candice, and Kat recreating a photo they took during season 1 — especially after rumors have circulated for years that Kat Graham was mistreated on The Vampire Diaries set.

While these rumors have never been outright confirmed, fans have paid very special attention to what Kat has said...especially when she confirmedshe was the lowest-paid cast member and cried over her natural hair after revealing she wasn't really allowed to have an afro while filming.

"Love you girls so much!!!!!! 🥹❤️❤️❤️❤️" Kat commented on Nina's post, while a fan added, "And now the rumors can definitely be ended 🫶🏼❤️." These women are so powerful and clearly love each other so much, and I will take any and every cast reunion we can get!

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- YouTube

When Brit + Co caught up with Ian Somerhalder, he also expressed how much he loved filming The Vampire Diaries. "Every single day it was a laugh," he says. "I mean we had to be serious, you're running from ghosts and vampires and stuff, and you know, someone makes a fart joke and a 130 people erupt in laughter, there's only so much you can run for your life."

And thank goodness, Ian confirms just how much fun the cast had! "We laughed, that's how we kept each other sane," he says. "I spent 8 years on the show and now it's [been] 15 years. It's my longest relationship."

"I cannot believe it's been 15 years," he continues. "And so everyone who's seen the show, watched the show, supported us — and me — in any way, shape, and form regarding the show, I thank you from the bottom of my heart."

What would your dream The Vampire Diaries reunion look like? Let us know on Facebook!

I’ve triedtons of different food trends in my day. From dumping chili oil on ice cream to concocting my very own Sleepy Girl Mocktail, nothing I’ve eaten measures up to the sheer weirdness we saw go viral on social media this year (major side eye to Dua Lipa’s pickle Diet Coke).

These are the top 5 most ridiculous TikTok-viral food trends of 2024 that left us questioning whether they really should’ve gone viral in the first place.

@claudiaeatsgood chamoy pickles are so good😋😩❤️ @Bussin Snacks #chamoypickle#chamoy#chamoypicklekit#bussinsnacks#takis#fruitrollup#mukbang#asmr#asmrmukbang#chamoypicklemukbang#juicy#pickle#mexicancandy♬ original sound - Claudia💕

1. Chamoy Pickles

People couldn't quit it with the chamoy pickles (AKA chickles) this year. I never would've guessed that chamoy, a condiment made from dried fruits, chilies, sugar, and lime juice, would be slathered atop the sourest pickles money can buy.

But the food trend didn't stop at just chamoy – many snackers stuffed their pickles with everything from the likes of Hot Cheetos, Takis, and Fruit Roll-Ups. What?!

This insanely sour, tangy treat kickstarted what the internet's coined as the 'Red 40 Diet', which certainly cannot be medically advised.

If you care for your GI tract, this food trend is 100% worth skipping and leaving behind in 2024.

@dualipaofficial

What do we call her?

♬ original sound - Dua Lipa

2. Pickle + Jalapeño-Infused Diet Coke

Diet Coke, pickle juice, and jalapeño juice = all the ingredients needed to concoct Dua Lipa's controversial 2024 drink. She loves it, but I on the other hand, do not.

Now, don't get me wrong: I love a good unexpected flavor combo, but gulping down a simultaneous dose of both pickle juice and jalapeño juice was not tasty to me whatsoever.

This trend even sparked a slew of Sonic diners to start ordering their soft drinks with pickles – but as divisive as this trend can be ("Don’t knock it till you try it," TikToker Mississippi Memaw told Food and Wine), it's just flat out weird.

@logagm

New cucumber recipe 🚨

♬ original sound - Logan

3. Cucumber Salad

If you bought a mandolin slicer recently, you might as well admit you're a victim of the TikTok-viral cucumber salad trend that made its rounds this year.

"Sometimes you need to eat an entire cucumber," TikTok user @logagmsounds off in the intro of every single one of his cucumber salad videos. And thus, the food trend was born.

It felt like I couldn't go a day on TikTok without seeing at least 5 recipes for a damn cucumber salad. When it comes down to it, I can appreciate the novelty (and taste) of this trend, but not the oversaturation. I'm gonna eat an entire cucumber one day, and get so tired of it the next. New innovations in 2025, please!

@kylekruegerr Would you try these?😂 #foodreview#seagrapes#food#review#tastetest#weirdfood♬ original sound - Kyle Krueger

4. Sea Grapes

It was like people wanted to eat the weirdest, grossest things in 2024. I can't blame 'em, especially if it's for clicks and views. But this food trend in particular literally made me want to gag – and I was only watching people eat through a screen (any fellow ASMR fans out there?).

They don't look like they're supposed to be crunchy, but they are. Sea grapes grow from aquatic plants and are filled with essentially what is a "salty liquid." They burst in the mouth when you eat them (one TikToker called them 'edible Orbeez'). Yuck.

@julieta.asmr I figured it out!! Blooper at the end 🥴 #asmr#asmrcommunity#asmrtiktoks#asmrvideo#asmrsounds#asmreating#asmrfood#asmrfyp#asmrmukbang#mukbang#asmreatingsounds♬ original sound - Julieta ASMR 🍒

5. Exploding Candies

The final (and especially weird) food trend I propose we leave behind in 2024 is these dang exploding jelly candies. They also made their rounds on ASMR TikTok, and I truly cannot stand to watch a single video featuring them.

First off, they look so annoying to consume. The fruit-shaped jellies are contained in a thin layer of plastic that's meant to burst open when you sink your teeth into it, prompting you to slurp out the sweetness inside. But what irks me the most is the fact that many people trying them can't even break the seal.

I'd rather watch someone make a simple PB&J than go to town on these microplastic-infused candies.

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Deep breaths – Daisy Jones And The Six might actually return for Season 2. Even though the Amazon Prime show ended its first season on March 24, fans are demanding more of their favorite band of six, and TBH...we can’t blame them!

The show, which was set to be a limited series with one season, might return for more, according to cast member Josh Whitehouse (Eddie Roundtree). He uploaded a rather cryptic TikTok earlier this year that alluded to a potential second season, but our hopes of seeing a tour were dashed. But, not all hope is lost!

Here's what we know so far.

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Sadly, we won't be getting a Daisy Jones And The Six Tour due to the SAG-AFTRA actors' strike that halted many ongoing and new projects — bummer! Riley Keough took to Instagram to share the gloomy news where Reese Witherspoon commented, "Aghhhh! Still hoping for this live performance.. one day !!"

She's not the only one who's saddened over this news though. Other comments mimicked her sentiments and we can't help but long for what could've been. Let's keep our fingers crossed that someone will give the fans what we want later this year!

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Hm, funny thing happened today 😙🎸🎶🕺🏻🤭 #daisyjonesandthesix

Prior to this, Josh Whitehouse previously captioned an unavailable TikTok video “Just arrived at a rehearsal studio, to, uh, have a band practice with Daisy Jones and the Six. But we already finished the TV show, so why would we be doing that?” Whitehouse questioned.

Taylor Jenkins Reid, the bestselling author and co-producer of Daisy Jones and The Six (who also wrote some of our other favorite books, BTW) has “certainly thought” about a second season.

Reid and Executive Producer Brad Mendelsohn aren’t ruling anything out. “I think we’re in a really fortunate position where we have a story that is final, and has an ending that feels really good,” Reid said in an exclusive interview with Variety. “I would only open that back up if it felt like there was a story here that we have to tell. Have I been thinking about what that is? I certainly have.”

Fans have already flooded social media with demands for more of their favorite ‘70s show.

Daisy Jones and The Six is based on the novel by Jenkins Reid, which is loosely inspired by the tortured IRL romance of Fleetwood Mac’s Stevie Nicks and Lindsey Buckingham. The incredibly talented cast also produced an album, AURORA, which we truly cannot stop listening to.

In a TikTok posted by Sam Claflin (Billy Dunne), some of the Daisy Jones crew could be seen in a studio with guitars and mics in hand.

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Cooking.

This mysterious post followed the album “Special Gift to Our Fans,” which included two singles that initially debuted during the show. The releases were, “It Was Always You,” sung by leading lady Daisy Jones (Riley Keough) and a second rendition of “Aurora,” which was performed by the whole band on Saturday Night Live.

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THE RIVER FT SIMONE WHEN?? 💳 💥💳💥💳💥 also whoever authorized this release I hope you live a long, happy life. #daisyjonesandthesix #djats #daisyjones #billydunne #foryou #daisybilly #daisybilly #booktok #rileykeough #djandthesix #samclaflin #itwasalwaysyou #amazonprime

The rumors of a rumored tour circled ever since the show aired, and cast members shared their thoughts on taking the band from TV to real life.

“You know there’s rumblings…I don't know if we have anything in terms of a full tour, but there might be an opportunity for us to get together in places. So if anyone’s looking forward to something like that I’d say just, eh, keep an eye out,” Will Harrison (Graham Dunne) said in an interview. When asked if he received a call about a tour, Harrison replied, “I would absolutely answer the call in a second.”

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Will Harrison tells @saragoretv about an opportunity for “Daisy Jones & The Six” to play live. Plus, he tells us what he thinks about going on tour. #NewYorkLive #WillHarrison #DaisyJones #daisyjonesandthesixshow #daisyjonesandthesix @daisyjonesandthesix

Since an IRL tour isn't happening any time soon, we'll be on the lookout for a second season of our favorite band.

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suki waterhouse bringing out camila morrone at new york n1 AHHH #sukiwaterhouse #camilamorrone #daisyjonesandthesix #concerts #livemusic #newyork #nyc

You know what's better than a tour? Seeing Suki Waterhouse and Camila Morrone unite onstage again! They both looked so freakin' good with Suki wearing a cropped purple fur coat and metallic boots while Camila wore a pink, fur-trimmed, and shimmery number. As far as we can tell, Suki and Camila looked like they were excited to surprise unsuspecting fans.

Comments on the fun clip ranged from "THIS IS SO IMPORTANT TO ME" to "This makes me want to rewatch Daisy Jones for the 4th time." All I can say is something about seeing Suki and Camila share a carefree moment is making my heart smile.

Tell us, Brit + Co readers, what do you think about Daisy Jones and the Six? Do you think a follow up is in our future?

Stay updated on all things entertainment with Brit + Co.

This post has been updated.

First loves are TOUGH — especially when you start to see all the red flags you missed along the way once it's over. If you've been dissecting your own early love stories by reading Reddit threads or chatting with your girlfriends about their own relationship experiences, just know this: you're not alone! The entire Brit + Co staff even found ourselves discussing the first person we ever fell in love with...and the recounts did not disappoint. From realizing 19 seemed to be a common age for our all-time worst relationships to understanding how our first love was probably not as ideal as we originally thought, it made us wonder why we couldn't pinpoint red flags back then.

Licensed Psychotherapist Prerna Menon, founder of Boundless, LCSW-PLLC and Licensed marriage and family therapist Joseph Cavins, LMFT have a few thoughts that have helped us decode the precarious time in our lives.

Here's why some of us ignored how awful our first love might've been

1. We thought our first love was perfect and would argue with anyone who wanted us to take things slow with them.

Savannah Dematteo

I'll never forget the first time I fell in love at 19. I thought my ex was the "wind beneath my wings" because he had a great sense of humor and was creative like me. I told myself he was the person I was going to marry so I was offended when my parents didn't think he was mature enough to be in a serious relationship. If this sounds familiar, pull up a chair because Menon explains why we tend to idealize our first love.

"Your first love is your first experience with romantic love too, hence you typically see it with rose-colored glasses. The overwhelming emotion is often infatuation, which tends to overshadow the more critical and analytical part of our brain," she says. Sadly, this sounds like something my parents told me before but I couldn't fathom how true it was as a teen.

As the Clinical Director at Southern California Sunrise Recovery Center, Cavins has seen this play out before too. He says, "In your first relationship, there is a tendency to put your partner on a pedestal. The excitement of new love can create a powerful emotional fog that makes it hard to see flaws clearly."

Essentially, this "excitement of having a boyfriend, girlfriend, or partner supersedes" our ability to questions things we normally wouldn't put up with, according to Menon.

2. We tried to ignore the how many times our first loves disagreed with our values or goals.

Keira Burton

While some couples are able to make their relationship work despite having a different outlook on life, sometimes it can be a sign that things aren't going to work long-term. Cavins says, "One major red flag is disregarding differences in values or goals for the future. For instance, you wish to become a parent someday while your spouse swears this will never happen— or vice versa. Early on, you might dismiss these differences, believing love will conquer all. However, these mismatched priorities can lead to resentment and challenges over time."

Honestly, I probably should've ran whenever my ex would mock my belief in God only for us to have to attend his mother and stepfather's church whenever I visited. There was so much confusion there, but I tried to dismiss it as something he needed time to work out.

Menon adds, "If this relationship makes you feel like you'e standing in quick sand - where you are trying to move forward but often feel held back in your individual aspirations, it may not be the right fit for you."

3. We thought it was 'cute' when our first loves made suggestions about which friends to avoid or what clothes to wear.

Luis Zambrano

Cavins says, "Excessively possessive behaviors are another red flag that people often ignore easily when they fall in love for the first time. People tend to justify such behaviors by citing that it's due to love or protective instincts." I'm all for being in a relationship where your partner's able to see different sides of a picture, but controlling behavior shouldn't come with that. What might that look like?

Cavins says, "Your partner may frequently check in on you, offer opinions on who you should spend time with, or subtly pressure you into making choices that suit them." For example, your partner could start off making suggestions about your style that slowly morph into them controlling everything you wear. Somehow I went from being a self-professed 'girly-girl' to trying to emulate the style of 'sneakerheads' in a short amount of time. Though I love wearing everything from New Balance to Niké sneakers now, it's in a way that feels cohesive with my style.

You may have brushed this kind of behavior off because, again, you thought it meant your first love wanted the best for you. "It is understandable that such behavior hypothetically may come off as pleasant or affirming; however, they often signal an unhealthy dynamic of control rather than mutual respect," says

4. We always gave in when our first loves forced us to be affectionate.

Adely

*Sigh* I'm shaking my head for my younger self because there were many times I didn't advocate for myself in my first romantic relationship. I'd often give in to affectionate or intimate moments despite wanting personal space so I wouldn't be seen as 'boring' or uninterested in my ex. Menon says, "Given the infatuation, your first relationship can feel all-consuming and often is codependent. Hence, this may result in you overlooking that your partner does not respect your boundaries or desire for personal space."

Partly because the excitement of the relationship makes you want to spend all of your time together, until you don't. And then, it is often too late to correct a maladaptive historical pattern.

4. We always made excuses for why our partners would shower us with affection only to ignore us days later.

Pavel Danilyuk

Let's be clear, 'love bombing' feels confusing and awful. No one should make you feel like you're the center of their universe only to ignore your calls or texts days later. But, this probably happened while you were with your first love. Cavins says, "There's a tendency for people to brush off their first love's emotional unavailability. When, for example, a partner is not responsive and not engaging in intimate discussions or does not express their feelings, some may rationalize this as them being 'just not ready.'" If that were the case, this person wouldn't have made you feel like being with you is something they truly wanted.

Of that, Cavins believes "it's important to recognize these behaviors early" because "they can result in a one-side emotional investment that leaves one party feeling unfulfilled in the long run." Sadly, my first love would have days where he was super sweet to me only to feel like I was smothering him with attention. This is also the same person who begged me to remain in our romantic relationship when he went to basic training although I felt it would be better if we chose to be friends. Imagine my surprise (and hurt) when he told me we should have an open relationship months after getting stationed for the first time.

I should've known better because he was never 100% on board with the idea of marriage until after he graduated from basic training. Cavins calls this "emotional disconnectedness." His further explanation is this is "when the initial chemistry between the partners subsides that emotional attachment matters." To avoid this, he feels "identifying and addressing any of these is critical in a case where you are looking to create a strong and healthy bond."

5. We ignored the ways our former partner blamed us whenever they got in trouble with their parents or an authority figure.

Ketut Subiyanto

Did your first love have a hard time taking responsibility for things that went wrong by gaslighting you to absorb the blow of their mistakes? If you've furiously nodding, we should start a support group. Cavins says, "A key sign is a lack of personal or relational growth. Healthy relationships encourage mutual development, but if one partner stays stuck in old patterns while the other grows, it can create frustration and distance."

At no point should you be the reason why your first love got in trouble after answering their parents' house phone late at night after telling you to call at a certain time. It's situations like this that should've alerted us to awful behavior, but I can see how easy it is to dismiss things.

What if I'm in love for the first time and recognize these signs?

Andrea Piacquadio

First, my heart goes out to you for being in a relationship that doesn't feel healthy. It hurts when we realize the person we thought was so great is anything but. The road to letting go of idealization may be long, but you can and will get better. Cavins says, "In the process of self-healing and recovery, the first step that must be taken is self-reflection. Ask yourself all of the necessary questions that arise, such as what this relationship means for you, what your boundaries are, and what this partnership has revealed about you as an individual."

I keep saying this, but relying on journal prompts can help you unpack a lot of things and, thankfully, Cavins agrees. He says, "You could always opt to talk to a specialist or being journaling in order to find some closure and draw meaning from the experience." Also, he wants you to start "making new memories." But, don't be passive about it.

"You will have to engage yourself in activities that will help redirect the focus of your thoughts. This could include joining a new class, engaging in a hobby, or traveling that involves some independence. These experiences can help shift your mindset from loss to growth and reinforce your identity outside of the relationship," says Cavins.

Another important thing you can do is "solicit help from others," according to him. "Calling on people you trust, like friends and family, to talk about these feelings can significantly help in healing," he says. This also helped me navigate life outside of my first real romantic relationship, reminding me that I still had a lot of love in my life that didn't begin or end with my ex.

Here are Menon's tips:

  • Let yourself grieve — Let this loss run its course. If you need to feel angry, sad, distraught, nostalgic. Allow yourself the full breadth of this experience. If I ask you right now "don't think a out a yellow monkey", I can bet you just thought of a yellow monkey. We call this "the imp of the mind". When you reject feelings, or thoughts, they come back 10 times more fiercely. To move the feeling along, we must let ourselves experience it.
  • Rediscover your identity (So important) — Your first love is often intertwined with self-discovery, and identity formation. Reconsider your goals, interests, values, friendships and hobbies and try to build your own sense of identity and individuality.

Anastasia Nagibina

I saw my first love again and it feels like we're falling in love all over. Can we have a happy and healthy relationship?

I'm not going to tell you to run even though I told my ex I never wanted to speak or talk to him again. You could easily reconnect with the first person you fell in love with and realize that you're both in a place where you can have something beautiful. However, Cavins and Menon want you to be mindful if you're in this position.

"Reconnection is possible," begins Menon, "if both parties can objectively claim that they have grown emotionally and resolved the issues that held their relationship back." But, "if the reconnection is built on one person growing and the other not, it is likely to fail," she alerts. You'll need to "proceed with caution," she says because "your first love was a nostalgic era in your life that can cloud your judgement." To put it more clearly, she doesn't want you confuse "the fuzzies" with a "true knowing that the two of you can make it work."

Cavins says, "Reconnecting with a first love can trigger a strong wave of emotions, but it is important that such a decision is made with caution and a strong sense of pragmatism. Personal growth is a primary factor. Each party in the relationship must ask themselves how they have grown and evolved as individuals over time. If past patterns of conflict, immaturity, or unhealthy dynamics remain unaddressed, the same issues could resurface."

He wants you to consider these things:

  • Are there any active relationships or past engagements that would make it rather difficult? That's because the feelings that come with reigniting old flames are very strong and can alter a person’s life, making it essential to start thinking from all angles before going ahead with it.
  • Address previous challenges that caused the breakup in the first place. If the reasons behind the breakup have been resolved or do not exist anymore, then yes, meeting again has its prospects. However, keep in mind that, at times, memories can be selective and unfavorably distort the truth by overplaying the good qualities while avoiding the negative ones.
  • Only rekindle things if both individuals are in a healthy emotional state and the decision is grounded in practical, mutual considerations—not just sentimentality or romanticized memories. Clear and honest discussions and an understanding of purpose are vital in ascertaining if rekindling the relationship will be worthwhile for both parties or if it will simply be an act of revisiting unresolved emotions.

Menon's final piece of advice is similar in that she encourages you to be "self-critical, self-aware, and self-nourishing." She doesn't want you to be afraid to be "clear and transparent about your expectations for the relationship" either. Though we weren't a fan of the outcomes of our first real romantic relationships, they've made us wiser. So, shout out to our first loves for being the worst because they've become our best learning lessons.

That's not all! We have even more helpful articles about relationships & family if you're looking for everything from celebrity couples to navigating hard conversations during the holidays.

Brown butter pasta. Wedge salads. Espresso martinis. Actual martinis. What do these foods and bevs all have in common? They make me fancy as ever when I’m chowing down on them.

But there’s one flavor in particular that goes above and beyond in the way of fancy foods, and it just so happens to be featured in one of Trader Joe’s tasty new dips.

Trader Joe's

I’m talkin’ truffle, baby! Not one, but two types of the earthy, richly-umami fungus stars in Trader Joe’s Truffle Dip, and TJ’s fans can’t get enough.

Trader Joe’s Truffle Dip boasts an “exceptionally creamy” base made up of ricotta, parmesan, and cream cheese. Most importantly, it earns its super sophisticated flavor from a blend of black truffle paste and white truffle-infused olive oil. Yeah, I’m obsessed.

@traderjoesobsessed

Trader Joe’s fan account @traderjoesobsessed recently shared all the truffle goodness on their page, with truffle-infused favorites like Truffle Burrata, Truffle Brie, andTruffle Oil joining the ranks. Their followers truly blew up the comment section with lots of love for the famed Truffle Dip

“Come through truffle!!!!🔥❤️,” one person wrote.

“I use this as a pasta 🍝 sauce,” another commenter said. “It's amazing!!”

“I think it’s soooo good with the brioche toasts,” someone else said.

“I buy one every week,” another person commented. “I'm obsessed!”

The Trader Joe’s Truffle Dip is shoppable in stores for just $5.49 for 7.5 ounces of the creamy, dreamy product. It’s the perfect addition to slather on lunch wraps and sandwiches and will definitely make your holiday charcuterie spread shine this year.

No matter how you enjoy it, you’re sure to become absolutely obsessed, too.

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