Brit Learns About Paranormal Activity & UFOs with Jeffrey Kripal

1. Choose your battles ahead of time.

You're not going to change everyone's opinion about all of the things over the course of a meal and a football game. You might want to show up ready for a duel of words with your Facebook-meme-king cousin, but that's just going to put your opinionated family member on the offensive from the moment you walk in. Decide ahead of time if there's one issue that you really cannot keep your mouth shut about if it comes up, and have two or three talking points ready that clarify your position on that topic. If your hot button does get pushed, your talking points will help you keep from making things personal.

2. Confer with the host.

If you feel comfortable with the person that's organizing or hosting Thanksgiving, speak to him or her in advance about how you can be on Team Keep the Peace. Most people aren't keen on a political brouhaha breaking out around their dinner table, so they'll probably be relieved to hear that you're on board and willing to help make the day go smoothly for everyone. Brainstorm some ideas about seating arrangements or wholesome activities to fill the idle family time that can lead to trading barbs.

3. Make it a game.

Caitlin Bergstein, a Boston-based matchmaker and relationship expert for Three Day Rule, suggests a fun twist on the swear jar concept. “If your family is up for the challenge, you can even make it a game. Each time someone mentions something political, they have to put a dollar in a jar (or take a drink, depending on how your family celebrates the holiday). At the end of the night, that cash can be put aside for the next family get together!"

4. Have a moment of silence.

Sometimes the idea of a quiet table can be intimidating (all those chewing noises!), but encouraging a moment of reflection among your holiday guests can actually be transformative. Whether you observe several seconds of silence in honor of relatives you've lost, as a way to silently acknowledge your individual blessings, or as an act of prayer or meditation, you've hopefully brought the room back to focus on each other's company and the gift that it is to be together.

5. Be an active listener.

If your one doggedlypersistent aunt can't let go of her obsession with the latest political scandal, reconsider what she's actually trying to tell you. Chances are, it's not just about what she saw on the news. “Assume that your polarizing relative actually probably just wants to connect, feel respected, and reduce their own anxiety about holiday gatherings, and interpret even difficult behavior as such," advises Mary Fisher, a Salt Lake City psychotherapist who specializes in family relationships. “Express the desire to connect while redirecting the conversation," Fisher recommends. Emphasize the fact that you're interested in protecting the time your family spends together. That can help soften the blow when you ask to instead hear them share a family memory or talk about a hobby you both share.

6. Disengage.

Remember that if angry words or offensive language start flying at you across the sweet potato pie, you don't have to respond. Have a script in mind to use, something like, “While I hear where you're coming from, I don't share your opinion, and I'm done talking about it today." Convey the message that you're quite clear on the matter being discussed, and you're not going to take the bait. You may have to repeat yourself several times, or you may choose to remain silent until things cool down around you. Either one is okay.

7. Duck out early.

If you feel like you have to retreat from the situation entirely, do it. One of the best things about being an adult is leaving when you want to leave. You don't have to subject yourself, your spouse, or your family to any kind of dialogue that is insulting, bigoted, or aggressive. Fisher shares these words of advice: “While we might think that the holidays are the time to resolve differences, they are actually the time to affirm and nurture connection, which can be an uphill battle with politically polarizing relatives." If you don't feel like a connection is being nurtured and the environment is not good for you to be in, say goodbye and make a break for it.

Did the Beach Read movie already find its Gus and January?

When Paul Mescal and Ayo Edebiri started posting selfies together, fans immediately picked up on their chemistry — and started calling for the two actors to star in a rom-com together. "The Paul Mescal and Ayo Edebiri romcom is imminent," one X user tweeted.

And when Emily Henry reposted one of their selfies on her story? Fans of the author's first romance novel immediately fancast the two actors as Gus and January. And with their personalities, and the way they complement each other, there's literally no one else I could see playing these roles at the moment.

While Emily "can’t confirm or deny anything with casting for any movie," the author did admit that "they would be amazing. I actually saw them being discussed [online] for several different roles — and I definitely have a favorite. But it’s fun, because different adaptations would either have one of them playing to type, or one of those adaptations would have them both playing to type, and one of them would have them both playing against type. It’s an interesting thing. I mean, they’re great, they could do anything.”

Are Paul Mescal and Ayo Edebiri in a rom-com together?

Paul Mescal and Ayo Edebiri haven't officially joined a rom-com together, but after Paul told Awards Watch he wants to do a romance movie with Ayo in "the next five years," The Bear actress agreed she's game...on one condition.

"If somebody writes us a good script," she says. "It has to be in an About Time vibe. Something that’s got, like, a heart, so he can still flex his drama muscles where it’s like, the covert rom-com. Like, still a rom-com, but we got to get something inventive."

Is Beach Read going to be a movie?

Yes, the Beach Read movie is coming soon! Writer-director Yulin Kuang told Brit + Co exclusively that she "really cares" about giving fans of the book a good experience.

"I truly believe that art belongs to the audience once it's out in the world," she says. "And so saying too much, it feels prescriptive, you know? So I hope they enjoy it. I hope that they know that a lot of care is going into the adaptations. I remember what it's like to be watching with anxious hearts about the announcements of all my favorite adaptations. And so that's the main thing. I hope they know that I really, really care."