Why Taking a Personal Retreat Is Like a Vacation for Your Mental Health

The Difference Between 'Body Drama' And 'The Real Body Manual'

If you've had the pleasure of sticking your nose in Nancy Redd's Body Drama, you're familiar with how well-researched and thorough it is. In that regard, The Real Body Manual is no different — but Redd highlights it's still a "totally different book." She says, "The world has changed dramatically, and we're talking so much more about bodies, and we see a lot more bodies."

Despite seeing all those "real" bodies on TV and otherwise, women — and people in general — still don't feel great about themselves. According to a 2022 study, 32% of teens had a negative opinion about their acne, while 31% weren't comfortable with their weight. Meanwhile, another study shows that 80% of women have referred to themselves as "fat."

To combat troubling statistics like those, Redd hopesThe Real Body Manual can help. "I think we're all operating with not enough information about the world we live in, and I think the more information we can receive in a safe, educated, medically-accurate space, the better," she explains.

Redd also really wanted to write a book that taught both her son and her daughter about their changing bodies — and she feels this is the perfect time for everyone to come together and learn about the way bodies not only look, but function. She likens these lessons to learning about world geography. "We don't just need to know about the small town we live in. We need to know about the state, country, the world-at-large," she stresses. And she thinks The Real Body Manual can help you "learn about your own body, your friends, and the people in society you live with."

If you look at the group of friends I have today, everyone doesn't have the same body shame. One of my friends is a little taller and curvier than I am while another is shorter and rounder. I dealt with acne-prone skin and dark spots while my best friend Cookie didn't really struggle with that. It's honestly rare that everyone will look the same — and that's okay! But learning about what's going on with all of us helps bridge our experiential gaps and creates better shared understanding.

And with that in mind, here are the 4 things I learned about my body — and all bodies — when chatting with Nancy and reading The Real Body Manual.

1. Understanding Your Body Doesn't Have To Look Like Everyone Else's

I grew up during a time where certain body types were celebrated more than others in media, and it had a negative effect on how I perceived my own body. I believed I wasn't supposed to have stretch marks because video vixens didn't, and became horrified when I discovered them in middle school as a slender girl. Not only that, but I didn't really develop curves until after I gave birth which made me feel like an outlier in my community.

Recent studies found there's a link between teens aged 16-18 years old developing body dysmorphia and social media...which doesn't sound surprising. And while there are countless body positive accounts that also exist — and I really do promise I'm not saying to completely ditch your socials — sometimes you have to take a step away from it (and other influencers) if it's having a negative impact on your self-esteem.

"Some bodies naturally look like those in music videos. I think separating that from being able to find love or have purpose in your life — they're completely separate things," Redd insists. She breaks things down even further by explaining why you not looking a certain way doesn't discount you from enjoying life. "Some people are born with the ability to be tennis stars, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't pick up a tennis racket because you're not Serena Williams."

The main point she drives home is that "every person can have a great time with their bodies" which is why The Real Body Manual reads like an encouraging, evidence-based love letter to readers.

2. Loving Yourself Is A Choice

Just like I had to make the decision to fully accept the body I have, it's something Nancy says everyone has the ability to do. "It's literally a choice," she says before one of her kids quickly pops into our convo. In a tender moment, she asks her child, "Hello, do you love your body?"

This brief encounter circles back to the reason why The Real Body Manual matters — it opens up these conversations with our kids, offering a tangible resource for others. I know I try to have more conversations like this with my son, and I've even encouraged him to hug himself when he needs a little dose of self love.

"The things that matter — having purpose in life, feeling love, being a good community member — don't have much to do with whether you have hyperpigmentation, freckles, cellulite, etc.," she says. "The more you know from the beginning of your journey that bodies look different, the easier it is for you to accept [yourself]. But if the only bodies you're seeing are sexualized in pornography, videos, and magazines, you don't have a real basis."

It's one of the biggest reasons she intended for The Real Body Manual to be a visual guide.

3. Your Naked Body Is Beautiful

"I really like showing people what the body actually looks like for the most part," Redd says. Yeah, that's right — The Real Body Manual features real people's bodies, not just illustrations. In doing so, she says, "Everyone can see someone who resembles them." It doesn't matter if you're heavy-set, a person with different sized breasts, or anything in-between. The point is that you'll be able to find yourself somewhere in The Real Body Manual.

My mother told me how little information her own mom shared with her about bodies. Because of that, my mom always stressed that she wanted my sister and I to have access to whatever information we needed. She wanted us to be informed, and never inhibited by her own lack of comfort over a topic. But not all parents feel comfortable sharing with their kids.

Redd says, "I don't think it was done with malice. I think people are just working with whatever they have which is not a lot." She further notes people have chosen to refer to genitals as "down there" for both men and women instead of saying the proper term for them for their autonomy. I'll be honest — growing up in a religious background often means sexual shame was attached to very normal things like breasts and penises.

Not everyone was on board with me telling my toddler he has a penis instead of saying "pee pee" — or not talking about it at all, if we're being honest. But I wanted him to feel comfortable with what he was born with, and to know that his dad having the same anatomy is normal. "We just don't use the proper names for things which increases this shroud of secrecy about it. We aren't taught health literacy," Redd says.

4. 'The Real Body Manual' Is A Must-Have For Pre-Teens, Teens, And Adults

Funnily enough, Redd informs me that October is actually Health Literacy Month, making all this really round out. We should know what's going on with our bodies, whether it's the proper terminology, what changes we're going through, what we can look like. Ignorance only makes our experiences more confusing and harder — especially when we're young and probably have a million different questions.

She explains that if you ask people specifics like 'How does a period work,' then they may not know the answer. "The same goes for if you ask what's the difference between a freckle and a mole," Redd explains. "It may not seem like these things are a big deal, but when something goes wrong, you need to know 'I need to get this thing checked out.'"

Information is power, and when armed with information about our bodies we can lead safer, healthier lives. Instead of wondering why we don't talk about things enough, Redd decided to take the bull by the horns and talk about them — and she thinks you should talk about them, even (and sometimes especially) when they're uncomfortable. She says, "Any time you feel shame or discomfort discussing your body, that's a sign you don't have enough information."

If you find yourself unable to ask other people questions, but want to start feeling comfortable in your body, I highly recommend that you read both Body Drama and The Real Body Manual because they're equipped with detailed explanations — and helpful imagery — about how bodies actually look, work, and feel.

Buy 'The Real Body Manual' Here!

The Real Body Manual

Where To Stay In Lake Geneva

There are so many hotels to stay at in Lake Geneva, but there are definitely a few that really standout properties you should consider during your visit!

Grand Geneva Resort & Spa

The Grand Geneva Resort & Spa is luxurious — yet somehow wonderfully quaint — property located an hour from Chicago that's great for your fall getaway. You'll find standard rooms and suites alongside a plethora of dining options and amenities to utilize during your stay including an indoor and outdoor pool, golf courses, a fitness center, a spa, and an on-site trolley. Plus, the resort has packages for the fall available where you can receive free rounds of golf during your stay on The Brute or The Highlands courses. Might I suggest sending the boys on a golfing spree while you and the girls savor the spa? 😉

Maxwell Mansion

Book lovers, this one's for you! The Maxwell Mansion is a boutique hotel that's two blocks away from Geneva Lake. The historic mansion has 28 rooms, some of which are inspired by historic figures such Emily Bronte, Charlotte Bronte, Louisa May Alcott, Jane Austen, General Grant, and Virginia Woolf. You'll also find a hidden speakeasy that's open to resort guests, and it's definitely worth checking out if you have some free time. Otherwise, you can find an indoor bar or grab a drink at the seasonally open tiki bar by the pool!

Warning: This hotel is adults only, so it's best suited for a romantic getaway or a girls' trip!

The Abbey Resort

For a more full-service experience, The Abbey Resort is a great option for families and solo travelers. Aside from spacious rooms, the property has indoor and outdoor pools, live music, an entertainment center, and a 35,000 square-foot spa. The Avani spa is absolutely a highlight at this property, too — you can book a massage, manicure, pedicure, hair and makeup services depending on what you're interested in. Outside of all that, the resort is simply stunning, making it an even better spot to enjoy the fall foliage and take some totally Instagram-worthy photos.

Where To Eat In Lake Geneva

While you'll eat lots of cheese curds (and cheese in general, let's be real) in Lake Geneva, you'll probably want to swing by a restaurant for a more hearty meal. Here are some top options to add to your reservations!

Pier 290

You can't visit Lake Geneva without dining alongside Geneva Lake, and Pier 290 is the city's only lakeside restaurant! While the view alone has plenty of allure, the menu loaded with familiar favorites from cheese curds to lobster rolls. Plus, if you stop by on the weekend, you'll be able to enjoy some awesome live music as you eat!

Sopra

If you're craving Italian food, then you'll definitely want to head on over to Sopra. This Italian-American bistro located on main street is home to scrumptious eats including fish, pastas, salads, and more. A majority of the menu items have unique names — I'm looking at you, "donald from delhi" — adding a little extra fun and flair to your dining experience. So grab a "b positive" cocktail (blood orange vodka, club soda, splash of blood orange juice), and enjoy your evening!

240 West

Chow down on locally sourced ingredients at The Abbey Resort's 240 West Restaurant. Chef Noah Gumustekin curated a selection of dishes from pappardelle to a grilled ribeye that'll get your mouth watering at the thought. Plus, if you're staying on the property, you can eat to your heart's content and make your way to a lovely night's sleep in no time!

What To Do In Lake Geneva

Go On A Mail Cruise

Looking to actually get out on the lake itself? Lake Geneva Cruise Line hosts a US mailboat tour where you can sit on a boat as employees deliver mail to over 75 homes around the lake. During the two hour tour you'll learn all about the different mansions on the lake, plus some fun facts about Lake Geneva in general! This is a must-do for first-time visitors!

Visit Yerkes Observatory

Science lovers will want to take a trip over to Yerkes Observatoryfor all things space. The historic building is home to the world's largest refracting telescope (wow!), alongside plenty of other exhibits which you can browse at your own leisure. If you're looking for a more guided experience, the observatory offers tours to help you understand what the heck you're actually observing.

Walk Along The Shore Path

You should totally take some time out of your busy itinerary to walk the shore path around Geneva Lake. The entire path is over 20 miles — which would take you almost all day to complete in its entirety — but you can just start and end wherever you'd like to get a gorgeous view of the lake and the larger-than-life mansions. The best part? It's free and open to the public, so you can stroll around at any time.

Take A Cooking Class

If you're looking to spend time like a local in Lake Geneva, then you'll want to register for a class at Lake Geneva School of Cooking. Join Chef John Bogan and his team as you participate in a hands-on cooking class alongside other locals and vacation go-ers. You can browse the classes offered online and pick one that suits your palate, whether that's a meat-driven dinner or a perfect pasta dish. Classes are priced at $150 per person, so it's a bit on the expensive side, but think of it this way: this experience goes beyond the class! You can cook this menu over and over again at home, remembering the fabulous time you had in Lake Geneva.

Try Some Local Cheese

You can't visit Wisconsin without trying some local cheese. Head on over to Hill Valley Dairy to get your hands — and taste buds — on locally produced cheeses. Once you figure out what you like, you can buy them to take home with you, so you can enjoy them even after you leave Lake Geneva! And who doesn't want more cheese in their lives?

Why is Lake Geneva so famous?

Lake Geneva is famous given all its fine dining, larger-than-life mansions, and absolutely beautiful body of water. Additionally, this quaint town is also in a pristine location located only an hour away from Chicago, making it an easy way to escape the hustle and bustle of city life and be a little more in tune with nature.

On top of that, plenty of travelers compare Lake Geneva to more expensive destinations across the globe, from Lake Comoto Newport. This lets you get all the beauty and luxury of those bucket list towns without the high price tags!

How do I spend a day in Lake Geneva?

When it comes to activities, Lake Geneva has plenty to offer! Whether you're simply walking the shore path, indulging in delicious locally grown dinners, or taking a cruise around the lake, you'll find fun everywhere you turn! And just because this is a lake town, doesn't mean you have to be outdoorsy. You can cater your experience based on your interests, including relaxing in one of the lovely luxury hotels.

Speak Now Spritz

Very few combos scream "Halloween" like purple and glitter. This Halloween cocktail is totally magical, and it's so pretty, it's basically party decor! (via @thespritzeffectfor Brit + Co)

Vampire's Kiss Cocktail

This is one Halloween cocktail that tastes good *and* looks good. Add it to all your spooky get-togethers to totally freak out your guests. Bonus points if you're dressing up as a vampire for Halloween! (via Brit + Co)

Cranberry Is The New Black Halloween Cocktail

Did you know that black vodka exists? Well, thankfully, it does, and it goes effortlessly into this sparkling cranberry drink. (via Brit + Co)

Black & Orange Rum Punch

It's a Halloween party, so there has to be some orange and black on the menu. This delicious rum punch is a welcome change from all of those pumpkin drinks out there. (via Brit + Co)

Blood Bones Halloween Cocktail

This campy cocktail is something your guests will be talking about all night. Prep your Jello bones ahead of time using some molds, and there's no need for any other garnish. Unless, of course, you want blood bags for the drinks. (via Brit + Co)

Ghostly Halloween Cocktail

Turn your cocktail a ghoulish hue by mixing red and green food coloring together with Chambord. Dry ice added before serving makes the drink smoke like a spooky potion. (via Brit + Co)

Apple Cide-Car

This spin on the classic Sidecar cocktail is like the grown up (and tastier) version of bobbing for apples. You can serve this Halloween cocktail hot or cold, depending on your preference. (via Brit + Co)

Zombie Cocktail

This delicious drink uses rum for a fruity, tropical finish that will remind you of summer – even on Hallow's Eve. (via A Couple Cooks)

Apple Butter Old Fashioned

Put your fall stock of apple butter to good use in this Old Fashioned recipe. The tart-sweet apple flavor mellows out bourbon's fiery bite for smooth sipping all night long. (via Half Baked Harvest)

Prosecco Punch with Cranberry + Orange

Tangy cranberry and sweet orange set this Prosecco punch apart, giving it a festive harvest flair. Change up the cranberry and orange ratio until you find a mix that you like the best. (via Chattavore)

Eyeball Martinis

Make your guests squirm with this ingenious Halloween hack. Stuff some Spanish olives into cocktail onions, and they look just like eyeballs – ready to grace your glass with gross. (via Sprinkles & Sprouts)

YoCo Vodka’s Monster Halloween Cocktail

To make this spooky sip, add 1 ½ oz YoCo Vodka, ¾ oz Lemon Juice, 1 oz Black Raspberry Liqueur, ½ oz Simple Syrup, and ½ tsp Activated Charcoal to a cocktail shaker. Fill the shaker with regular ice and shake vigorously. Strain into a glass, add 1 pea-sized Dry Ice Chip on top, and watch your "monster" come alive! (via YoCo Vodka)

Death Eater Negroni

This moody take on the Negroni is the drink your Harry Potter-themed party craves. (via Half Baked Harvest)

Hallowine Sangria

Here's a sweet sangria to add to your spooktacular holiday list! It's made with Cabernet Sauvignon, sugar, orange juice, orange liqueur, and club soda. Easy! (via The Seasoned Mom)

Spooky Punch

This tasty fruit punch gets a spooky upgrade when you swap the fruit garnishes for faux spiders. Serve in small glasses or go big with fancy goblets that would make Dracula proud. (via Culinary Hill)

Glow-in-the-Dark Infected Brain Cocktail

If you're into the blood and gore of The Walking Dead or 28 Days Later, this bright concoction may be right up your alley. While it's not quite as eerie as a brain hemorrhage shot (eek!), this whole drink glows in the dark thanks to the tonic water, so serve it when the lights go out. (via Boulder Locavore)

Pulparindo

Natali Villarruel, National Tequila Ambassador for Mi Campo crafted this stellar cocktail inspired by Halloween candy. “This drink is a throwback to my childhood growing up in Mexico and the Pulparindo candy we’d get on Halloween," she said. To make it, shake 1.5 oz Mi Campo Reposado, .5 oz Ancho Reyes Liqueur, and .5 oz lime juice with ice before straining into a glass. Top it with some Jarritos Tamarindo, and get ready to gulp! (via Mi Campo Tequila)

Haunted Orchard Cocktail

A mysterious rustling noise in the orchard... a mist creeping in between the trees... it sounds like after your apple picking adventure, you could use a drink! (via Half Baked Harvest)

Magic Cotton Candy Martini

Impress your friends with an alcoholic magic trick by playing magician mixologist at your party. Pour shaken grape juice and vanilla vodka over cotton candy, and watch it dissolve into a delicious syrup to sweeten your Halloween cocktail. (via The Cookie Rookie)

Toil & Trouble

Craving a Hallowen cocktail that's a bit more elevated? This recipe from Elvie's in Jackson, Mississippi infuses edible glitter into your holiday elixir. To make it, combine 1.5 oz black sesame-infused scotch, 0.5 oz Cathead Hoodoo Chicory liqueur,0.5 oz Cocchi sweet vermouth, and 2 dashes blood orange bitters with some edible glitter! (via Elvie's)

Pomegranate Cider Mimosas with a Salted Caramel Rim

Start your Halloween celebration early by serving up these pomegranate cider mimosas. Of course, it wouldn't be trick-or-treating season without adding some candy to the mix with the salted caramel rim. (via How Sweet Eats)

Beetle Juice

This Halloween cocktail boasts a haunting blood red color, perfect for spooking your friends with. To make it, shake 1.5 oz Espolon Blanco tequila, 0.75 oz Grand Marnier Cordon Rouge, 0.75 oz orange juice, 0.5 oz lime juice, and 0.5 oz beet syrup over ice. Strain the mix into an iced glass and garnish with an orange slice! (via Grand Marnier)

Clonakilty Witches Brew Cocktail

This drink pays homage to Ireland's myths and legends through the essence of Samhain, which is, essentially, the ancient Celtic version of Halloween! To make it, mix together 1.75 oz Clonakilty Port Cask Whiskey, .5 oz orange juice, a splash of ginger ale, and garnish it all with an orange slice. (via Clonakiilty Distillery)

Witches Brew Cocktail

Use regular or black vodka to make this eerie cocktail. The recipe *also* includes a special hack for rimming the glasses with colorful sugar. It's scary good! (via Sprinkles & Sprouts)

The Grave Digger Halloween Cocktail

This creepy cocktail mixes bourbon, hard cider, and ginger ale for a drink that will make even the scariest of demons disappear. (via Boulder Locavore)

Sour Frankenstein Halloween Cocktails

What makes these cocktails *so* delightfully sour? Homemade margarita mix, shaken with freshly squeezed limes. Oh, and that's not real blood on the rim — just a little corn syrup and red food coloring. (via The Girl On Bloor)

The Quick Demise Halloween Cocktail

You wouldn't think that a drink with such a poisonous name would be good for you. With ingredients like carrot, lime, and orange juices, this cocktail is more likely to extend your life... rather than end it. (via Best Friends for Frosting)

Spider Bite Cocktail

Give the *illusion* of a spider's web, without having to deal with the real thing (or having to clean up a party prop!). This Halloween cocktail is bright and colorful, which is perfect for anyone who's not a huge fan of darker decor this time of year. (via A Beautiful Mess)

Vampire's Drip Cocktail

If vampires had access to these boozy milkshake-inspired cocktails, maybe they wouldn't be thirsting for blood all the time. Yum! (via Half Baked Harvest)

Ilegal Mezcal Margarita de Granada

This spookily strong Halloween drink is powered by mezcal. To make it, add 2 oz Ilegal Mezcal Joven, 1 oz agave syrup, and 0.5 oz pomegranate juice to a shaker, shaking well until chilled. Strain into a rocks glass with fresh ice, garnish with pomegranate seeds and a lime wheel, and you're set to sip! (via Illegal Mezcal)

Slow Cooker Vampire Punch

It's always a nice gesture to make a special drink for guests who don't consume alcohol. Simmer this mocktail punch in the slow cooker so they can help themselves whenever they get thirsty — it'll also make your house smell deliciously like cinnamon. (via Boulder Locavore)

White Widow Halloween Cocktail

Sure, a black widow sounds scarier, but this white widow will knock you out with one swing (or swig, ha!). Garnish the top with a black gel icing web that will catch all of your Halloweentime prey. (via Best Friends for Frosting)

Witch's Brew Cocktail Recipe

You certainly wouldn't catch any self-respecting witch with a single beer. She would most definitely be drinking a fabulous purple cocktail, complete with a glitter spider garnish. (via Pizzazzerie)

Pumpkin Beer-mosas

Pumpkin juice (like they drink in Harry Potter) is mixed with pumpkin beer for a brunch drink that's truly autumnal. (via Growing Up Gabel)

Candy Corn-Infused Vodka

Didn't think the all-time best Halloween candy (we know it's an unpopular opinion, but still, the right one) could get any better? This infused vodka will make you think again. (via Kitchen Treaty)

Diplomatico Rum Blood Moon Negroni

To craft this delicious Halloween negroni, stir 1 part Diplomatico Mantuano with 1 part sweet vermouth and 1 part of a bitter Italian aperitif over ice to chill. Strain into a rocks glass with a big block of ice, then garnish with grapefruit peel! (via Diplomatico Rum)

Poison Apple Cocktail

These spookily sour cocktails emulate everything you love about a margarita and make it Halloween-friendly. (via Crowded Kitchen)

Pumpkin Margaritas

The season's favorite ingredient gets blended into a frozen sip that'll leave you with the spooks all Halloween long. (via Clean Cuisine)

Smoke & Mirrors Halloween Cocktail

Love a Halloween cocktail, but aren't a huge fan of spooky drink accessories? This sip is equal parts sweet and smokey, and features one of our favorite ingredients: orange blossom water. (via A Spicy Perspective)

Halloween Punch with a Severed Hand

You can create an icy 'severed hand' using a glove for this big ol' bowl of spooks. (via The Edgy Veg)