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Why do people want to share their relationship status with others?

My sister used to ask me this question when I was in my 20's, and I always looked at her like she had two heads growing. I couldn't fathom the idea that people wouldn't want to talk about their relationship online because it felt like everyone was doing it. I mean, a study from Pew Research Center shows 8 in 10 people on social media see relationship posts, so it clearly wasn't outrageous to think it was normal.

But, that still doesn't answer why people are drawn to sharing cute little updates about their partner or relationship. Luckily, Bray has a good indication of what drives people to give others a sneak peek into their lives. "People share their relationship status for all kinds of reasons. Some want to mark their territory — nothing says 'back off' quite like a cute couple selfie! Others are just excited and proud of their partner and want to share the joy," she says. That stems from people's "need for a sense of belonging or to receive positive reinforcement from others," she adds.

But, this doesn't necessarily make people weird. It's just human nature that makes us act the way we do. "We as humans are just hard wired to seek connection, and broadcasting our connections, makes us feel more accepted and secure in our social lives."

Should couples have conversations about their social media expectations?

I don't care how hot you think someone is, you're going to have to learn how to communicate with them. It's true even if your chemistry is off-the-charts because healthy relationships don't fall out of the sky. They're built via honesty, respect, forgiveness, and other important factors.

Before assuming your partner is or isn't okay with you posting about your relationship, Bray is 100% convinced you should talk things through. "Social media is still in the wild west of relationship etiquette, and without discussions, assumptions about 'correct' behavior can run wild," she hints. For example, you could be happily posting about your partner only for someone to point out that they're not following you on social media.

"Some people are super private, while others practically live their lives online. Misunderstandings happen when expectations aren't laid out so talking about it can prevent messiness in the long run," Bray observes.

If two people have gone on a couple of dates, should one of them be upset if the other isn't publicly talking about them?

So, you swiped right on Tinder or Bumble, and you had a few amazing dates with one of your matches. Before you start publicly declaring your love for them, Bray wants you to reconsider. "Hold on! It's just a few dates! Let’s pump the brakes. The early stages of dating is not the time to make grand social declarations," she declares. As someone who tried to 'date' people from Tinder, those first few dates aren't a guarantee that you've found the love of your life.

"Posting someone on social media can feel like a big step to some people so expecting that level of public commitment too soon might be too much pressure. If you’re already thinking, 'Why haven’t they posted about me yet?' after two dates, it might be a good time to check in with yourself about where those expectations are coming from," advises Bray.

I've recovered from my former, "Is he the one" obsession so also take it from me — see where things go first and then refer back to question #2!

Is it a red flag if someone doesn't post their partner on social media?

It would be so much fun if we personally had Dustin Poynter, the flag guy, from TikTok helping point us in the right direction — but this is one of those things that errs on the subjective side. Though Bray doesn't feel it's necessarily healthier to keep your relationship private, she thinks "context matters." "Some people are just more private or feel weird about social media in general," she says.

But, that doesn't mean certain behaviors don't warrant a few eyebrow raises. She notes," If someone is super active on social—like posting about their dog’s morning routine and every cupcake they’ve ever had—but doesn't ever mention their partner, it could create a need for a deeper conversation." Before you feel justified about grilling your partner — as satisfactory as that may feel — take a second to breathe.

Bray would prefer you work to understand "why they don't post, rather than assuming your partner is keep you a secret." If you discover the latter to be true, follow your instincts and let that person go because you don't deserve that!

Do you think it's healthier for couples to keep certain aspects of their relationship private?

Everyone has a different view of what makes a romantic relationship healthy, so this is one of those things Bray says, "absolutely depends on the couple" because some "genuinely enjoy sharing their lives online." You've probably seen your share of couples who make cute content together whether they're married or not. I'd be lying if I said I don't specifically keep up with a few whose content makes me smile.

But, other couples may not be interested in sharing their relationship online because they "want to be private and keep the relationship free from the judgements or opinions of others," according to Bray. That's not to say they have something to hide, though. Instead, think of it as a personal preference.

"As long as both partners are on the same page and it’s not a source of tension, it’s all about finding the balance that works for them. If it starts to feel like a performance for likes rather than genuine connection, though, that’s where it can become problematic," Bray reminds.

How can someone bring up their partner's posting habits without sounding accusatory?

You may feel eager about posting about your partner while they're less enthusiastic and this could make you feel upset. It's easy to jump to conclusions when you're already upset, but Bray feels "tone is everything." Ironically, she suggests something I've heard in therapy sessions and that's "to be curious, not confrontational." Hopefully this stopped you in your tracks if you were ready to give your partner a piece of your mind.

"You can say something like, 'Hey, I’ve noticed we haven’t shared much about each other on social media? What’s your take on sharing stuff about us online?' It’s important to frame it as a mutual exploration of rather than a demand for a public declaration," Bray points out.

What would you tell someone who wants to emulate couples who consistently post content together?

We've all seen couples who we think have the cutest relationship, even though we've never met them before. As much as you may admire a couple, Bray thinks it's a "slipper slope" if you want to try to recreate their online moments. "I’d encourage someone to focus more on what makes their own relationship feel fulfilling, rather than chasing #couplesgoals," she encourages.

However, this isn't a sign that you're not supposed to ever share anything about your partner or relationship! "If posting together feels fun and real, go for it! But if it starts feeling like a performance or that you are in competition with other couples, it's probably good to take a step back," she warns.

Also, keep in mind that social media doesn't show you every single moment of couples' lives so don't worry about trying to look picture perfect based on a 30 second to 30 minute video.

Is It Ends With Us streaming?

Yes, you can now watch It Ends With Us at home! The movie is finally on Netflix, but it's also available to rent or buy on Amazon Prime. That means you can watch the movie while reading up on all the cast drama without shame.

Is Ryan Reynolds involved in It Ends With Us?

Yes, Blake Lively revealed Ryan Reynolds helped write one of It Ends With Us' most memorable scenes. "The iconic rooftop scene, my husband actually wrote it," she tells E! News."He works on everything I do, I work on everything he does. So his wins, his celebrations are mine and mine are his."

Lively also says that Reynolds showed up in the movie in another unexpected way: through his clothes! "I have a few of my husband's shirts and socks randomly in the movie," she tells People. She also wears her own boots in the birthday party scene, and her own Louboutins in the bar.

"I have some of Gigi Hadid's sweaters in the movie," she continues. "She has this line, Guest In Residence, but also she would run out and I would be like, 'I want this one' because of all the really cool patterns and whatnot, and she’d be like, 'I have that. You can wear mine.'"

The way I IMMEDIATELY slapped my hand over my mouth at the first notes of "My Tears Ricochet" from Taylor Swift's Folklore. What a song choice for the first trailer! And then to have Ethel Cain's "Strangers" lead the second trailer makes me want to cry! This is the one trailer we have been waiting for all year, and it totally captures the emotion, heart, and drama of the book.

When is the It Ends With Us movie coming out?

It Ends With Us premiered in theaters August 9, 2024. With so much color, plus the fact Blake Lively's Lily runs a flower shop, a summer release is perfect! Because of the writers' strike and actors' strike, production on the film paused over the summer of 2023, meaning the movie got delayed from its original February 9 (then June 21) release date.

Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni (who also directed) star in the film as Lily and Ryle, respectively. On April 20, 2023, it was announced that 1923 star Brandon Sklenar would join the duo as Atlas, and on May 1, Jenny Slate joined the cast as Ryle's sister Allysa. Hasan Minhaj joined the film on May 25 as Alyssa's husband Marshall.

Baldoni also posted a TikTok confirming that after an open casting call, they found Isabela Ferrer for young Lily!

Fans were initially unhappy with Blake's casting, because in the book, Lily is supposed to be in her early 20s. But author Colleen Hoover explained a bit of the intention behind the casting with TODAY, explaining that the "new adult" genre at the time favored characters in their early 20s — and that the point of the book is its message, not its cast or costumes.

“As an author, we make mistakes,” she says. “There’s no 28-year-old neurosurgeons, you know? You go to school for 15 years. And so to make corrections to what I messed up in the book, we aged the characters up somewhat...I love that there’s discourse surrounding it, I do. I think that people are going to be very pleased. I’m very pleased.”

What is It Ends With Us about?

It Ends With Us follows Lily Bloom after she moves out of her small town to start a flower shop in Boston. When she meets Ryle on a rooftop and quickly falls head over heels, it seems like fate. That is, until she comes face-to-face with her first love Atlas. It's a story of strength, deep-rooted relationships, and identity that made waves on social media.

It Ends With Us filmed primarily in New Jersey. The first set images from It Ends With Us are from a scene that takes place between Lily and Ryle. While Baldoni is wearing a simple black sweater, Lively is wearing two different shades of pink over a brown dress. I love the way costumes highlight all the ways characters are different, and this is the perfect example!

On January 6, 2024, Blake Lively and Justin Baldoni were finally spotted in Jersey City again. While the costumes have gotten some backlash, I really love the texture and visual interest in this patchwork jacket + jeans combo! It feels creative and bright — just like Lily :).

And on April 30 we FINALLY got the first official images from the movie. The colors are just as bright and yet still have some emotional weight behind them to match the story. I'm particularly obsessed with this Blake Lively look — I'm a sucker for a jeans + tank + cardigan combo.

Is Colleen Hoover making a movie out of It Starts With Us?

We might have just gotten a movie adaptation of It Ends With Us, but fans are already hoping for a sequel movie based on It Starts With Us! There's no word on the potential sequel, but star Brandon Sklenar is totally down to return.

"I would love to do it, I really would, I would love to do it," Brandon Sklenar told Access during New York Fashion Week. "I hope we can get it together because I think the fans deserve it, and I'd just love to tell more of Atlas' story and get into his past a little more. Yeah, it would be beautiful if we can do it. I would love to."

Who else is working on the film?

Lively, Baldoni, Hoover, Steve Sarowitz, and Andrew Calof all served as executive producers, while Alex Saks, Christy Hall, and Jamey Heath produced. Hall also wrote the script for the film.