25 Unusual Ways To Repurpose Your Jeans

An old pair of jeans is either distressed to perfection and fits like a glove, or simply last season’s news. When you come across the latter, resist the urge to add to your cut off collection and instead, transform this durable and versatile fabric into something totally wow-worthy. From unique home decor items to stylish accessories, here are 25 ways to repurpose denim.

1. No-Sew Kindle Cozy: Spray adhesive is the key to creating this jeans-covered no-sew project that protects your tech. We not-so-secretly love that the cover is bejeweled in chunky rhinestones. (via Punk Projects)

2. Jean Cocktail Napkins: While jeans may not be the most appropriate attire for a cocktail party, they sure make cool cocktail napkins! You can even customize them for the occasion with bleach stamps! (via Brit + Co.)

3. Patriotic Denim Bunting: Don’t let this patriotic denim bunting sit in darkness post Independence Day. This upcycled decor would look perfectly in place at a family BBQ or picnic, too. (via Pretty Handy Girl)

4. Modern Denim Quilt: Diagonally quilted rows and an ombre fade from light to dark denim make this jean quilt thoroughly modern. This crafty project is definitely a time commitment, but so worth the hard work! (via It’s Always Autumn)

5. Recycled Denim Headband: Here’s another brilliant no-sew project that’s fit for fall. A pair of jeans is cut into two strips of fabric that are criss crossed to create a beautiful turban-style head wrap. (via Three Mustard Seeds)

6. Woven Denim Rug or Trivet: Ready to get your weave on? Depending on your enthusiasm for the task, you can create a small, useful jean trivet or an impressively woven denim rug. (via Liesl Made)

7. Recycled Denim Pouch: Basic sewing skills aren’t all that’s needed to make this pouch, because in our book, it’s the creative painted tribal pattern that makes this pouch. (via Jessica Rebelo)

8. Denim Scrap Stamps: Use the scraps from your jeans as swirling stamps? Genius! (Jean-ius?) This denim hack is not just insanely resourceful, but also totally fabulous! (via Crafting in A Green World)

9. Denim Snack Bag: You’ll never guess how easy it is to make this seriously chic creation. We’d proudly tote around more than just snacks in this rugged clutch.(via Between the Lines)

10. Patchwork Denim Throw Rug: The free fabric scrap bin is your bestie for this patchwork project. Squares of contrast fabric and denim give an unmistakably boho vibe to this rug. (via Free People Blog)

11. Jean Coasters: Snip the seams of your jeans to create the thin strips that make this spiral denim coaster. In a set of two or four, these table accessories would make the perfect housewarming gifts. (via Sierra)

12. DIY Denim Phone Case: Here are two ways to trick out a denim pouch for your phone! If you’re like us and we can’t decide which style you like more, why not make one for your phone and one for your music player? (via Free People Blog)

13. Patchwork Jean Bowl: We love seeing all the ways that this DIY basic can be done, and this patchwork bowl is no exception. Just generously apply Mod Podge to scraps of jean to make this stiff and stylish denim bowl. (via Henry Happened)

14. Denim Hair Bows: Here’s more proof that dingy denim scraps can be turned into adorable upcycled accessories. And since they’re so cheap to make, you can practically make a different hair bow for each day of the week! (via Salute to Cute)

15. DIY Denim Whale: Can you believe that this insanely cute whale toy was hand sewn from denim scraps? It just goes to show you that amazing things are possible with a little imagination and DIY chops! (via Valaan Villapaita)

16. Denim Fabric Flowers: We just can’t stop thinking about the many ways that you can use these dynamic fabric flowers. From gift wrap toppers to rustic buffet decor and pretty party favors, the possibilities are nearly endless! (via Miss Party)

17. DIY Denim Pencil Case: Want a totally customizable carrier? Try your hand at this awesome denim pencil case. Though we wouldn’t change a thing about the light denim, seafoam green zipper, and stark white skull! (via A Dash of D.I.Y.)

18. Denim Napkins: This whimsical DIY will have you switching out your table linens for denim in no time! We love how this table setting is dolled up with lace and lavender for a more upscale feel. (via The Pocket Stylist)

19. DIY Christmas Decor: Already gathering inspiration for Christmas crafting? Then feast your eyes upon this delightful denim gingerbread man! This stuffed softie would also be an adorable addition to any baby shower gift. (via Eat Drink Chic)

20. One Tough Pouf: We tip our hats to this Maker who conquered the process of making this amazing denim pouf. We need to commission a few of these for Brit HQ! (via Michele Made Me)

21. Old Denim Corner Bookmark: Feeling like furniture is too tall an order for denim DIY? Start small with this heart-shaped bookmark. Durable denim will no doubt protect your page ends. (via The Cheese Thief)

22. Denim Cut-Offs Wine Bag: Tote your wine around in this terrifically preppy wine bag. We’re nuts about the striped handle and neon pink thread. (via Design*Sponge)

23. Denim Pom Poms: Have you made these denim pom poms yet? If not, what are you waiting for!? We love the idea of using them as tassels on gift wrap, or strung as festive garland. (via Zakka Life)

24. Denim Arrow Cushion: This geometric patterned pillow would make a great weekend project for experienced seamstresses. We’re gushing over these gorgeous designs. (via Etsy)

25. Recycled Jeans Footwear ($4 for pattern): Denim footwear? Count us in! The cost of this pattern is a small price to pay for the promise of this casual footwear. (via DoNight)

Have you turned an old pair of jeans into something totally wow-worthy? Tell us in the comments below!

Denimis essentially seasonless, but come fall and winter, we’re reaching for jeans and jackets like it’s a full-time job. Gone are the days of shorts and skirts – and even your favorite pair of leggings won’t cut it once the temperatures dip. It’s officially time to trade in your years-old skinny jeans for trendier denim pieces that’ll instantly lift your looks! Let these denim trends guide your every style move.

This season erases everything you thought you knew about jeans. They're no longer the uncomfortable, restricting silhouettes of years past – this year’s most popular denim styles are all about comfort. I’m talking baggy silhouettes and wide-leg styles that not only feel good on the body, but provide a unique shape to your outfits that you’ll have tons of fun playing with.

Baggy Jeans

Hollister

Hollister Low-Rise Dark Wash Super Baggy Jeans

I simply cannot escape the baggy jeans trend. After experiencing the sheer comfort of this pair from Hollister, I don’t see myself reaching for high-waisted, skin-tight styles any time soon.

Meredith Holser

The low waist aspect of this pair in particular provides an elongating effect to my torso, and I love wearing them with basic tops. They honestly feel like I’m wearing sweatpants, but don’t look lazy at all.

Urban Outfitters

BDG Ozzy Loose Jean

If it’s a relaxed fit you’re looking for, these loose jeans from BDG are it. They have a straight leg that’s reminiscent of vintage denim styles, so they’re super timeless and easy to wear with just about anything. I know what you may be thinking – baggy jeans aren’t necessarily flattering around the bum. And while that is true, everyone’s going crazy for this low-key style. You can definitely up the baggy look by going all-out with layers and accessories.

Super Wide Leg Jeans

Free People

Levi's Ribcage Wide-Leg Jeans

I’m a big believer that wide leg jeans look good on everyone. Their natural flared effect can help shape out your waist, adding to an hourglass look. They have a very laid back feel to them that looks truly iconic alongside some statement boots!

Abercrombie & Fitch

Abercrombie & Fitch High Rise Wide Leg Jean

Though you can shop wide leg jeans in all sorts of waist heights, I think high-rise styles are the most flattering of them all. This Abercrombie & Fitch pair comfortably (but snugly) hugs your waist and hips before falling into a more relaxed fit around your legs.

Huge Cuffs

Free People

We The Free Final Countdown Cuffed Low-Rise Jeans

Want that off-duty model look? Cuff it. Jeans with exaggerated cuffs are everywhere this season! They’re perfect for drawing attention to the bottom half of your outfits, so there's no excuse not to rock these with your favorite fall shoes!

American Eagle

American Eagle Stretch High-Waisted Stovepipe Cuffed Jean

The cuffing in question also works in a two-toned denim look that’s super easy to achieve. I love that this pair from American Eagle still boasts a simple, familiar silhouette, but has a unique style twist in the cuffs. I’d wear them with some fall-esque clogs and an oversized flannel up top.

Deep, Dark Washes

Gap

Gap Mid Rise '90s Loose Jeans

If I had to sum up the dark wash denim trend in one word, it’d be ‘sophisticated.’ The deeper, almost-black blue color is definitely less casual than a light or medium wash would be, so I think they’re perfect for elevating a still-cozy outfit.

J.Crew

J.Crew Denim Trouser

You could even wear them to the office with the right silhouette and matching garments – these loose-fitting denim trousers could become a total main character moment when paired with ballet flats, a belt, and a tailored cardigan.

Denim Barn Jackets

J.Crew

J.Crew Denim Barn Jacket

Moving away from pants territory, denim jackets will always be a proper fit for fall. Right now, barn jackets (also referred to as chore jackets or barn coats – they’re all the same style) are having a moment, taking on denim in the cutest way. This J.Crew jacket is the perfect final piece for layering on top of sweaters and flannels, and it would even look chic worn with a pair of jeans in a coordinating wash!

Free People

We The Free Denim Barn Coat

This Free People jacket boasts a contrasting corduroy collar that can add a bit of spice to your looks. The oversized, loose fit gives that cool-girl effect that works well with more form-fitting garments like dresses or skirts. I think this is a definite staple that you can wear year after year!

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For your friend who just can’t resist making a charcuterie board for every occasion to your cooking-crazy uncle, we’ve got the coolest edible gifts for 2024 right here. Gift something deliciously unforgettable – from decadent chocolate truffles to zesty spice mixes, these edible gifts bring joy to every bite. Edible gifts are also perfect for those who host you during the holidays and even coworkers! Get ready to spread some cheer with these edible gifts.

The 24 best edible gifts of 2024:

Below, find our top favorite edible gifts for everyone on your list!

Amazon

Graza Olive Oil Variety Pack

Any foodie will instantly recognize Graza's iconic squeezable olive oil bottles. This variety pack includes both their "Drizzle" and "Sizzle" oils that work wonderfully for a wide range of recipes.

Amazon

Coop's Original Hot Fudge

This hot fudge is crafted from super wholesome ingredients: pure chocolate, fresh cream, organic sugar cane, natural cocoa powder, and a touch of sea salt all come together for a heavenly (and very chocolatey) experience. Glob it on top of some ice cream to achieve pure dessert-y bliss.

Amazon

Tate's Bake Shop Chocolate Chip Cookies

These cookies may be light and crispy, but they're decadent as ever. Snag this 4-pack of bags (with 14 cookies each) to totally nail any sweet tooth's gift this year!

Flamingo Estate

Flamingo Estate Spicy Extra Virgin Olive Oil

This luxurious olive oil is infused with Guajillo chiles that bring an undeniable kick to whatever you cook with it.

Amazon

Hickory Farms Farmhouse Sausage & Cheese Food Gift Basket

Because who doesn't love snacking on meat and cheese? This loaded gift basket will keep them munching and satisfied during the in-between moments around the holidays.

Compartés

Compartés Boozy Chocolate Gift Box

This gift box's boozy chocolate flavors range from espresso martini to strawberry champagne. Gift them the entire box or split it up amongst friends for a fun (and alcoholic) stocking stuffer moment!

Fly By Jing

Fly By Jing Sichuan Starter Gift Set

This gift set from Fly By Jing includes four different chili crisps and sauces so your giftee can instantly spice up their dishes. We love using the OG Sichuan Chili Crisp on eggs, noodles, chicken, and more.

Kola Goodies

Kola Goodies Lilly's Maple Chai Box

This adorable book-shaped gift box is packed with a delicious maple chai drink mix for the perfect cozy beverage, which is simply a necessity around the holidays (and wintertime as a whole).

Fishwife

Fishwife The Starter Pack

Fishwife's variety of tinned fish can be used across a wide range of different dishes like sandwiches, wraps, salads, pastas, and more. Gift them this set of 7 tins so they can test out different recipes and find their absolute fave!

Uncommon Goods

Custom Message Shortbread Cookies

Let these sweet treats deliver your holiday wishes for you! You're able to customize the text on each piece of shortbread to bring even more cheer.

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When it comes to clothing, there's nothing more empowering than a good-fitting pair of jeans. And I'm not just talking good, I'm talking these-jeans-were-literally-made-for-me good. As a midsize gal who once exclusively shopped in the plus size section, I know how hard it can be to track down that quality in jeans. Luckily, I've done the research through lived experience (and lots of shopping) and found a handful of brands who've absolutely mastered making on-trend jeans for gals with curvier proportions. Scroll on to see 11 downright flattering pairs of plus size jeans, all perfectly eligible for year-round wear to boost your confidence and complement your personal style.

Levi's

Levi's 501 Original Fit Women's Jeans

Levi's 501 jeans silhouette is the literal blueprint when it comes to denim. They're utterly timeless, and thankfully, very flattering. With a high waistline and straight legs, they're also really easy to wear any way you like. This medium-wash pair in particular will fit closer around the waist and hips before flaunting a looser fit along the legs. The material they're made of boasts a gentle stretchiness to move with you perfectly! Available in sizes 16-24.

Old Navy

Old Navy Extra High-Waisted Sky-Hi Wide-Leg Jeans

One major quality I look for in plus size jeans is a high waistline, because I've found it fits my body best and helps smooth out my tummy. This pair from Old Navy features an extra high waist which is balanced out by wide legs, creating a silhouette that favors bodies that might be more top-heavy. The coolest part is the colorblocked design that'll absolutely turn heads wherever you wear 'em. Available in sizes 00-30.

Gap

Gap High Rise Barrel Jeans

Gap also has tons of plus size jeans to pick from! Barrel jeans are hot right now, and no one should be left out of the trend. This style is shoppable in a wide size range and four different denim washes to help you find your perfect pair! This one is especially comfy since the legs are meant to be very drapey and loose. The waistline is definitely more fitted, and the hem of these jeans tapers inward to create a playful shape that can work stylish wonders with your body. Available in sizes 24-35.

Good American

Good American Always Fits Good Legs Straight Jeans

Good American's plus size jeans are really unique in that they follow a versatile one-size-fits-four sizing chart and always flaunt a gap-proof waistband. The material they're made of has 100% stretch that "ensures optimal flexibility and unrestricted movement." You'll find that the mid-rise waistline and straight leg styling will work with a variety of outfits and garments, making these a great pair to rock year-round. Available up to size 32.

Madewell

Madewell The Plus '90s Straight Jean

These jeans are made from a stretchy material that still retains some rigidity for shaping your body, but not restricting it. They are fairly fitted through the hips and thighs but boast a higher back rise for a "curve-enhancing lift." I really enjoy the darker wash on these, too. It feels perfectly formal for in-office days or date nights, but can easily be styled for casual outings. Available in sizes 14-24.

Abercrombie & Fitch

Abercrombie & Fitch Curve Love Low Rise Baggy Jean

Abercrombie & Fitch's Curve Love line is a total godsend for curvy and plus size people. The bespoke fit "eliminates waist gap with additional room through the hip and thigh," and while you may feel weary about rockin' a low-rise pair, I'd argue they're the comfiest silhouette you could ever rock, since the waistband won't dig into your stomach. The baggier fit around the hips and legs is helpful on lazy days, too, all while still making you look put-together. This style comes in so many different washes and lengths. Available in sizes 23-37.

Old Navy

Old Navy High-Waisted OG Loose Utility Jeans

The vertical seaming on these jeans can help shape your body and supply a nice elongating effect for your legs. The waistline sits at the belly button while the fit is only semi-fitted through the hips and thighs. These also have a slight stretch to them, thanks to 1% spandex. Available in sizes 00-30.

American Eagle

American Eagle Stretch Super High-Waisted Straight Jean

American Eagle also brings the range when it comes to plus size jeans. If you're on the hunt for a solid everyday pair, these straight-leg jeans are it! They're crafted from a mid-weight structured denim material with "just enough stretch" for everyday comfort. The medium wash is perfect for pairing with anything from blazers to t-shirts, though they also come in two lighter colors. Available in sizes 000-24.

Free People

We The Free CRVY Gia Wide-Leg Jeans

These designed-for-curves jeans have an additional 2-inch difference between the waist and hips to accomodate for larger, curvier bodies. The high waist-wide leg combo is ultimately super flattering since it can help balance out your figure. I'd absolutely wear these with my fave sweater and ballet flats for fall time! Available in sizes 28-35.

Levi's

Levi's Classic Bootcut Jeans

Another staple in the Levi's jeans vault, this bootcut pair is especially laidback. They have a hint of stretch that's perfect for sporting every day, and the vintage-inspired silhouette is totally on-trend for this season. Levi's says they're their "softest jeans ever." Available up to size 26.

Abercrombie & Fitch

Abercrombie & Fitch Curve Love High Rise Cropped Wide Leg Jean

Cropped jeans are especially fun to wear with boots, so you can show off your best footwear. These A&F jeans also follow the brand's Curve Love guidelines, being made with additional room along the hips and thighs. The material is equal parts drapey and rigid to help shape your bod. Available in sizes 24-34.

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If you're finding it hard to make friends as an adult, or maintain friendships from different life stages, you're definitely not alone. According to Dr. Deborah Gilboa, MD, Scientific Advisor for Azar, and a recent study from Azar and Talker, it's not abnormal to feel heightened levels of loneliness. In fact, that study suggests Gen Z feels lonely every day.

"Loneliness feels isolating because it goes beyond just lacking company; it’s a lack of meaningful connection," she says over email. "Social contact without meaning can worsen loneliness as it increases the individual’s perception of isolation and lack of belonging. The antidote is true social connection."

But how can we find that real social connection and community? I talked to Dr. Gilboa, JustAnswer Mental Health Expert Jennifer Kelman, and NYC Psychologist Dr. Alexandra Stratyner PhD, for some insight into behaviors that attract friends. Here are some behaviors that will simply make you irresistible — and will help you identify good friends in others!

Keep reading for some advice on how to attract friends — and easy ways to be a better friend to the people you love.

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There's no shame in realizing you're feeling lonely, but it's also important to identify when that loneliness morphs into isolation. "Even though many might be experiencing the same feelings, that doesn't mean they are reaching out for support," Kelman says. "Many are not feeling enough strength to reach out to others or feel like they are being a burden so they reason alone with their feelings."

"It's also become more evident as our reliance on digital communication has grown, sometimes leaving us more connected online but feeling less understood and less connected in more meaningful, in-person ways," Dr. Stratyner adds. And then there's the social expectation of it all. "Many people tend to hide their loneliness because they feel shame or embarrassment about it. This can make it even harder to open up and connect with others who might be feeling the same way. The more we keep these feelings to ourselves, the more it reinforces the isolation, even though we all experience it in varying forms."

"It is hard to see light when things feel dark, and many go inward to deal with their feelings," Kelman points out. "Many are so burdened by their feelings that they might not feel capable to care for those around them or to show up and be present for others."

And just like Dr. Gilboa says, we're looking for true connection, not just surface-level friendships. But how can we make true social connection? Here's what they suggest.

1. A good friend shows care and empathy for the people around them.

If you care for the people around you, there's a very good chance others will want to be your friend. "People that show empathy toward others are very attractive qualities as it shows that one has the capacity to care for others and be present for them," Kelman says. "Those that are gregarious and selfless can be quite appealing as well. Those that are self-involved tend to repel others rather than attract."

Focusing on others instead of yourself can be easier said than done, but the it's definitely worth it. "People are drawn to those who show genuine care and understanding," Dr. Stratyner agrees.

​2. A good friend is reliable and trustworthy.

Our inner circle is going to be made up of people who know us inside and out, but it's unlikely someone will reach that level of emotional intimacy unless you really trust them. "In friendship people rate reliability, honesty and trustworthiness more highly [than romantic relationships]," Dr. Gilboa says.

​3. People are attracted to humor.

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I'm sure we can all think of someone who never fails to make us laugh. And being the funny friend can mean a lot of things: you know how to poke fun at yourself or you don't take things too seriously (unless they need to be taken seriously, of course). But that doesn't mean making other people the butt of mean jokes.

"A good sense of humor helps foster a positive, lighthearted atmosphere, making interactions feel enjoyable and memorable," Stratyner says. "Plus, everyone loves to laugh."

​4. You need to be a good listener.

No one wants to be talked at and never listened to. After all, we do have two ears and one mouth! But simply nodding your head and zoning out won't cut it. "People appreciate feeling truly heard," Dr. Stratyner says. "This demonstrates respect, interest, and a willingness to connect on a deeper level."

"Be a great listener without asserting your own views or agenda," Kelman adds. "Be available, vulnerable and present. Ask those around you how they are and truly listen to how they feel. Be open and direct and most of all, be a constant. Nothing better than knowing that you will be there for all things."

So engage with what your friends are saying and, even better, remember it later!

5. A good friend is generous.

Is there a better time to talk about generosity than Thanksgiving? Be generous with your time, resources, and your heart — but don't worry, that doesn't mean you have to let someone else steam roll you. After all, a good friend also won't take advantage of you!

"Giving to others and the community are wonderful traits and habits that are very attractive to others and may draw people in," Kelman says. "People want to be around people that give and are easy-going in their interactions with individuals and the world around them."

​6. New friends are attracted to positivity.

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When things feel dark, new friends will be attracted to someone who can make the world feel a little lighter. "People are often attracted to those who can find the silver lining, stay hopeful, and spread good vibes, especially in challenging situations," Dr. Stratyner says.

That's not to say you can never have bad days or process things like disappointment and grief. It just means you aren't ruled by them. (Listen, as an Enneagram 4, I'm talking to myself!)

Ok, you might be thinking, this is great but what do I do with this information? Here are some easy, actionable steps to take if you want to make new friends.

1. Understand why you're feeling lonely will help you address the real problem.

"First is to get an understanding of the loneliness and where it is coming from...finding community too soon may cause an increase in loneliness even while being surrounded by others," Kelman recommends.

You can't reach a solution if you don't know what the real problem is. I realized since I work from home, I need to do better about leaving the apartment, and my favorite way to spend an afternoon is coworking with a friend at a coffee shop.

​2. Finding new hobbies will connect you with similar people.

I met some of my best friends through a big movie group, which means when I have a meme or a piece of news to fangirl over, I know exactly who to contact. "Find activities that ignite you, find like minded individuals with whom to connect," Kelman adds. "Join a book club, pick up a new sport or hobby, but again, trying to immerse yourself too soon may not have any impact on the lonely feelings."

"The antidote to loneliness is social connection — true connection that paves the way for belonging," Dr. Gilboah says. "Talking to people to learn what interests and values are shared will open the door for the types of relationships that become community."

​3. Don't be afraid to put yourself out there.

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Listen. If you only ever order takeout and watch Netflix, you'll simply never make new connections. You gotta get after it! "Look for community events, clubs, or hobby groups that align with your interests, whether book clubs, sports leagues, or volunteering opportunities," Dr. Stratyner says. "Being around people with shared passions makes it easier to start conversations and find common ground."

​4. And don't be afraid to reach out first.

For some reason, we've decided that reaching out first (or double texting) means we're needy and insufferable. This is simply not the case because who doesn't want to know they were thought of!! Plus, there's a good chance that if you're overthinking every little detail, other people are too.

"Reach out, even in small ways, to those around us who may be feeling the same," says Dr. Gilboah. "Loneliness often leads to rumination - the act of dwelling on or spiraling downward through negative thoughts. Ruminating can cause further isolation and distracts us from the people and stimuli around us."

​5. Be present when you're finally with people.

When you do make special connections, it's super important to make sure you're offering your full attention. "Showing up emotionally and physically makes them feel valued and heard, strengthening your bond," Dr. Stratyner says. She also recommends checking in to remind them you're there, and genuinely celebrating their wins (which, separately, is definitely a sign of being a girls' girl). "If a friend is going through a tough time, offer to help in any way you can," she adds. "Sometimes, simply acknowledging their struggle and offering your time can make all the difference."

"The best news about friendship is that Gen Z values authenticity above just about any other factor in friendship," Dr. Gilboah says. "Gathering the courage to be your true self and [mixing] that with empathetic listening will make you a sought after friend."

What's your favorite way to get to know new friends? Here are 10 Thought-Provoking Questions To Know Close Friends More Intimately!

With the holidays now approaching almost eerily quickly, you might already be feeling slightly uneasy about the family stresses that are bound to be on your plate (along with delicious Christmas cookies, of course). Spending a lot of time face-to-face with family can dig up old arguments or squabbles that everyone may have forgotten during the rest of the year.

Learn the 8 best ways to support your friend while they're in the middle of family drama

You’re not the only one dealing with the drama, though, and while your own family issues might feel somewhat out of your control, there might be more you can do to take the edge off the stress that your friends are feeling in anticipation of holiday gatherings. Keep scrolling for eight expert tips for how to best offer support to your most stress-ridden BFFs.

1. Listen without judging if your friend reveals an ongoing argument about a family will

RDNE Stock project

Being a good listener is one of the most basic — and yet most important — things you can do as a friend 365 days of the year, but when tensions run high near the holidays, those listening skills become all the more crucial. You might even consider resisting the urge to speak, like, at all. “Be a good listener and don’t give advice,” licensed marriage and family therapist Katie Ziskind says. “Supporting someone doesn’t mean that you have to fix their problem. Instead, truly being supportive means giving a hug when someone is crying and being a caring friend.”

2. Prep your pal to expect drama if your uncle's invited his new girlfriend and ex to dinner

Rather than reassuring your friend that things at family celebrations may not be as bad as they fear, trust what they know about the situation and help them wrap their head around what’s to come. This should minimize the stress for them in the long run. “If you expect it and it happens, situation normal,” certified life coach Susan Golicic tells us. “If you expect it and it doesn’t, well, then, a bonus!”

3. Help your bestie make a plan in case their fight-or-flight mode gets triggered

Going into any situation with a plan almost always feels better than going in unprepared. Per writer, speaker, and healing expert Alisa Zipursky, a helpful plan might include specific check-in times, a code word that indicates your friend needs extra support, and ideas for creating healthy boundaries with family members who make them feel especially triggered. “The idea is to make asking for help as easy as possible,” Zipursky says. “Making sure a proactive plan is in place well before someone enters the stressful situation can help relieve some of the anticipatory anxiety.”

4. Check in often by sending your friend periodic texts 

Licensed counselor Maria Inoa recommends that you prioritize regular touch-base texts over the course of whatever event is causing your friend the most stress. It’s not about solving the conflicts or taking away their pain. Instead, you can focus on offering gentle reminders that you are thinking of them and are available if they need you.

5. Create a new tradition that revolves around you and and your bestie's favorite Christmas movies

If your friend’s family holiday celebrations don’t exactly inspire positive feelings about the occasion, why not help them establish some better associations? Licensed clinical professional counselor Anna Poss suggests planning a “low-stress, fun way to celebrate with each other before or after the actual holiday.” Get a seasonal movie night or cookie swap on the calendar before everyone leaves town to hang with family. Those cozy vibes may help dull the negative, anxious feelings.

6. Write down words of affirmations for them to look at

Photo By: Kaboompics.com

Grab some pretty stationery and put your love and support on paper for your BFF. “In the note, remind her how strong, courageous, and capable she is,” licensed psychotherapist and life coach Diane Petrella says. “Let her know how much you love and admire her and how grateful you are for her friendship. Write whatever you think your friend needs to hear to feel supported, grounded, and loved.” Remind her to hide the note in her pocket or bag so she can read it whenever she needs a little extra TLC over the course of the holidays. You can even go one step further and send them home with a care package, per therapistShannon Thomas.

7. Invite your friend to your family celebration

If things have gotten so bad with your bestie’s family that she wants to steer clear of their celebrations entirely, you may want to invite her to join you and your crew instead. Even if she opts to decline your invitation, it will mean a lot to her to know that she has choices. If your friend does take you up on the offer, Mountainside Treatment Center‘s family wellness manager Tina Muller recommends that you try to incorporate some of her favorite traditions into your holiday schedule.

8. Keep your phone nearby if your friend needs to talk about everything that happened

Photo By: Kaboompics.com

“Before an event with possible family issues even happens, schedule a time not long after to see the friend,” marriage and family therapist Sarah Epstein suggests. “Now you’ve become the light at the end of the tunnel for them.” Be prepared to be a listening ear over dinner or a workout session so your pal can vent about everything that’s gone on and (hopefully) be ready to move on from there.

How do you and your pals support each other through the not-so-fun parts of the holidays? Tweet us @BritandCo.

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