DIY Basics: Studded Flats, Chucks, and Pumps

1. Slouchy Boots

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Take a page from Charli XCX's style book with some slouchy boots this winter. This shoe trend has roots that go back to the '80s, but you can absolutely rock them with some modern flair.

Banana Republic Factory Vegan Tall Slouch Boots

A sleek black pair of boots like these are easily wearable with everything from maxi skirts and dresses, to jeans and jorts. I like that the slouch here is a bit more understated, though you can definitely find styles that are way more exaggerated. Jennifer Lopez recently rocked a statement trench coat with her slouchy boots, and the look's living in my head rent-free.

Free People Extra Slouch Boots

Remember what I said about exaggerated? This is what I was talkin' about. These suede boots from Free People embrace folds on folds, bringing an interesting bit of texture to this boho-leaning look. The pointed toe and stitch work throughout also give this pair some nice Western flair.

Steve Madden Smith Red Leather Boots

Another fun iteration of slouchy boots you can wear this winter is the foldover boot. Though smoother, you still get quite the unique silhouette! These red boots were simply made to be seen.

2. Tall Moto Boots

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Moto boots are the winter shoe trend to snag if you like your outfits to have a some edge. What sets them apart from a regular ol' boot is typically the hardware visible on the sides and a chunky heel that can withstand wear.

Maguire Lucca Boots

These are extremely reminiscent of the famous Frye Campus boots, especially in color. The harness gives them a good biker edge, though you can also choose to remove it based on your mood. Since most moto boots hit right under the knee, they work just as well with mini dresses as they do wide-leg jeans.

Ash Trinidad Boots

Black pairs with everything, plus the darker color adds a good amount of mystery to any moto-inspired winter look. I'd rock these with some vintage jeans and a warm, chunky sweater. Bonus points for a vampy makeup look.

Steve Madden Ruskin Chestnut Suede Boots

Suede is undoubtedly one of the main stars in this winter's shoe trends, no matter what kind of shoe it's featured on. The more you wear these, the more character the suede takes on. It's a win-win.

3. Pointy Flats

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Let's get straight to the point: pointed toes are in. They're perfectly fierce and feisty – I think they're the ultimate style for happy hours or nights out with the gals. You can shop all kinds of shoes with pointed toes, like boots, booties, and kitten heels, but pointy ballet flats are truly where it's at if your main consideration is comfort.

Linea Paolo Noella Flats

The lace-up bow styling and dotted trim on these flats give 'em the cutest coquette vibe.

Jeffrey Campbell Lilly Buckle Slingback Flats

For an edgier take, these slingback flats boast some real eye-catching buckles. Pair them with some baggy jeans, a basic tee, and a chore jacket to totally nail all of this year's fashion trends.

Jeffrey Campbell Pistil Pointed Toe Flats

These flats are iconic not only in shape, but in color, too. Brighten up the drab winter season with this playful burst of yellow! I promise you won't regret it.

4. Platform Mocaasins

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You have the Clarks Wallabees to thank for the resurgence of moccasins this season. I personally adore them for their standout silhouette, and it's only a bonus that they're uber-comfortable for the cold temps! Moccasins come in many different styles across the brands we love, listed below.

Clarks Wallabee Boots

These booties are perfect for laid-back winter outings. Pop on a pair of jeans and your go-to cold weather layers, and you're ready to conquer anything – in style.

SeaVees Hayward Platforms

The contrast between these shoes' upper and lower halves is so cute to me. They were purposefully designed to be part-sneaker, part-loafer, so you can easily dress them up or down based on the day.

UGG Women's Disquette Alpine Slippers

Though more of a slipper, these UGGs still retain a ton of classic moccasin details. The laces and stitching are a dead giveaway, plus you get to enjoy the comfort of a slipper (thanks to the lining) without them wearing out super quick (just look at that thick outsole)!

5. Burgundy Loafers

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Burgundy (AKA dark cherry red) proved to be one of 2024's hottest colors across all sectors of fashion. Thus, it's no surprise that it's been creeping its way towards footwear! Burgundy is quite the sophisticated color, finding its match with an equally sophisticated shoe style: loafers.

Mia Amore Hali Penny Loafers

Though more polished, you can still wear loafers casually with jeans and graphic tees. I think they look best when you have a basic sock on, too.

Dr. Martens Adrian Snaffle Pebble Grain Leather Kiltie Loafers

The burgundy color trend also gives you the perfect opportunity to work in a pop of color to your wardrobe without going too bold, if you're not really ready to invest in brights (or if they're just simply not your thing).

Steve Madden Madison Burgundy Box Leather Loafers

You can literally put some prep in your step with these classic leather loafers.

6. Fur-Lined

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Peeps of fur (or preferably, faux fur) are this winter's final prominent shoe trend, mostly thanks to the UGG brand's signature faux sheepskin lining. These styles are undeniably cozy and functional for providing all the warmth your feet need this season.

UGG Classic Chillapeak Boots

Boosted with furry texture and height from the platform soles, these UGGs are perfect for wearing aprés ski or just on those bone-chilling cold days in the city.

Tommy Hilfiger Lined Lace-Up Snow Boots

These lined boots were specifically made to stand up to snow, but still look so stylish. I love the crossing laces and suede paneling on the sides that make them feel more a tad more upscale!

UGG New Heights Genuine Shearling Cuffable Boots

You can wear these rolled up or cuffed down to show off more of the soft shearling lining. I love that these UGGs push past the brand's typical look with a funky curved footbed and chunky sole.

As a gal with a little more meat and muscle on her bones, this has always been a problem for me. It’s infuriating, but it feels even more isolating. I can’t always wear the same styles that smaller women do, and even if I do find similar boot designs fashioned for wide calves, they look noticeably cheap or simply don’t check all the boxes in terms of my desired look.

I grew tired of saving all the “perfect” tall boot outfit inspo pics to my Pinterest board only to find that the boots in question had way too small of calf sizes, so I did what I always do when I shop for size-specific pieces: I took to Reddit.

I primarily consulted r/femalefashionadvice, r/plussize, and r/ausfemalefashion to see what people like me are saying about wide calf boots. The frustrations with finding good-looking, comfy tall boots was pretty similar across all three subreddits. As one passionate user put it:

“Even at a size 6, I have never been able to just buy any old pair of boots and have them fit. It is interesting to me how we've made great progress the past several years in regards to body inclusivity, yet somehow there seems to be a huge lack of sizing in regards to tall boots… It makes me so sad to see these beautiful boots everyone else gets to wear, slouchy, over the knee, western inspired, leopard/snake print, etc. Nothing like that comes in wide calf.”

Luckily, Redditors across all three threads suggested a handful of brands that actually offer cute wide calf boots with extended sizing. I had never heard of a few of them, but after scrolling through their sites, it felt like I struck gold.

The top-recommended brands for wide calf boots:

• Penningtons
• Børn
• DuoBoots
• Franco Sarto
• Sam Edelman
• Billini

Franco Sarto Bowman Wide Calf Knee High Boots

You're meaning to tell me these chic boots can really accomodate my calves?! The deep red color already had me sold, but that 15.75-inch calf circumference made this style so much better. They also come in a smooth brown color and a foxy faux-snake pattern, if those speak to your personal style more.

Børn Hayden Extended Calf Boots

The suede leather construction of these boots honestly rivals that of the beloved Campus boot, but their fit is much more roomy, boasting a 16.5-inch calf circumference. These zippered boots also have a playful lace-up detail on the back that's utterly unique.

Penningtons Extra Wide Width Black Tall Heeled Boots with Harness Straps

The calf circumference on these bad boys starts at around 17 inches for shoe size 6, and tops out around 19 inches for shoe size 12. I can't get enough of these moto-style boots and I love that they have the signature harness with silver hardware around the base that other similar boots do.

DuoBoots Saffron Knee High Boots

The fact that you can choose the calf sizing yourself when purchasing these Western-esque boots is ahh-mazing. The options start at 13 inches and go up to 20 inches to hold your beautiful legs without any fuss.

Billini Granger Extended Curve Boots

From all the wide calf boot brands suggested on the Reddit threads I scrolled through, Billini has to be my favorite. They state that these adorable camel-colored boots can fit calf sizes from about 18.11 to 21.42 inches, and while they do have an elastic panel on the sides to stretch even further, I think it's discreet enough that it doesn't distract from the overall look. Score!

Baretraps Thalia Wide Calf Boots

A very similar style to my wishlist Sam Edelman boots, this black pair actually has a 16.5-inch calf circumference that'll fit my legs to a tee. The block heel is the perfect shape and height, plus the toe isn't overly pointed (I don't necessarily care for pointy toes).

Sam Edelman James Wide Calf Western Boots

Finding cowboy boots with wide calves can be a big challenge – but no more! These reddish-brown boots have a 16-inch calf circumference so you can confidently rock any and all Western looks.

Billini Oshea Curve Boots

Immediately yes. These broader-fit boots are everything you need to make a statement with your shoes. They're definitely going on my wishlist! The calf circumferences for this style start at 16 inches and go up to 19 inches based on your shoe size.

Vince Camuto Seshon Extra Wide Calf Boots

With a 18-inch calf circumference, you won't have to worry about squeezing into these tall boots. I adore the timeless squared toe and wide block heel on these!

1. Talking About Money Can Expose Hidden Feelings

It's impossible to know how someone feels every second of the day, but we probably all think we have a good understanding of the people we're close to. But people are capable of hiding how they feel about something or burying their discomfort until certain situations 'expose' them. Why does it seem like money has a way of doing this?

Both Irwin and Dunlap agree that "money is taboo," leading people to avoid conversations about it. "Data tells us that we are more likely to talk about any other taboo topic—sex, politics, religion, even death—before we’ll talk about money," says Dunlap. West agrees and says, "Money is like that one friend who’s incredibly helpful but totally untrustworthy—everyone likes what they bring to the table, but no one wants to talk about them directly." Did you think of someone specific? It's okay because I did too!

The problem is that money can make "hidden insecurities come out, old sibling rivalries rear their heads," and more, according to West. "Even something like 'who paid for what' can suddenly become a life-or death conversation," she says. It's strange because Irwin says a Wells Fargo study shows that "many Americans across all ages are worried about money," proving we're all thinking about it, despite our avoidance issues.

2. And Money Can Also Create Unease In Conversations

"When we don’t have open conversations about money, we’re left to navigate it on our own, which can keep us feeling underpaid, overworked, or unsure about our financial situation," Dunlap points out. She feels "discussing money requires a huge amount of vulnerability" which "isn't easy for everyone." You may have seen how other topics are swept under the rug by family members or friends based on reasons they're not ready to talk about.

Though Irwin believes saying something like saying, "'Here's what's keeping me up at night' or 'here's what my goals are' could strengthen connections," Dunlap knows that "shame, comparison, or fear of judgement" can cause people to remain tight-lipped about their finances.

If you've experienced a weird moment because of money or had to be the unfortunate witness of an awkward conversation, my apologies. It's not fun no matter who's involved because, unfortunately, "money carries layers of emotions, like pride and insecurity, that turn simple conversations into potential minefields," says West.

Dunlap says there's a silver lining if people are willing to be open, however. "The key is respecting each person’s comfort level, and encouraging openness if they're willing to meet you there. It’s not going to be perfect at first, but by starting to share more about your own financial experiences, you can start to break the cycle of shame and fear around money. You might be surprised at how quickly others are willing to open up too."

3. Making Assumptions About Other’s Money Status And Financial Situation Can Lead To Disrespecting Boundaries

No one's saying you should never lend friends money, but being mindful about the decision is worth noting. West feels "it's complicated" while Dunlap believes the issue "can be tricky." There's a chance a low-key loan becomes an expectation that you should dish out money every time someone needs help, even if you're trying to maintain your own bills. "Lending money to a friend is like sharing your Netflix password—simple in theory, but one wrong move, and things get weird," West forewarns.

Dunlap also says, "When you lend money to someone close to you, there's always the chance that you won’t get it back. You want to be mentally prepared for that! Otherwise, it can strain your finances and your relationship. The emotional toll can be just as heavy, as unpaid loans can lead to resentment or awkwardness." It's not unusual to hear about certain friends being unreliable in more ways than one after you've let them borrow something. Unfortunately, Irwin indicates this happens because some people "don't expect to give something back that they've borrowed."

Because of this, Dunlap thinks "it's best to avoid loans if possible." Should you decide to move forward with helping out a friend who's in a bind, make sure you're both in agreement about repayment and what to expect moving forward. West says "having clear terms" or "gifting a small amount if you can afford it" is like "buying their friendship insurance." The latter is something Dunlap agrees with because it "helps prevent resentment if they can't pay you back as planned." Plus, she feels it also "keeps the loan within an amount you're okay with potentially losing."

4. Lending Money Is A Slippery Slope That Can Lead To Distrust And Resentment

It's amazing how money can lead to a friendship breakup if boundaries aren't created or respected. "Money is a sneaky little devil who can push everyone’s buttons. It can cause resentment if one person feels taken advantage of or someone’s 'casual loan' becomes an epic saga of unpaid IOUs," West says. Not only that, but Dunlap knows "money can strain relationships between friends and family by highlighting differences in how we value it, expect to use it, or feel about sharing it."

Friends and family members shouldn't take each other's kindness for granted, but human nature is fickle at times. That's not an indicator that someone you love is a "bad" person, but they may feel like you owe them your time and money. However, Irwin says this isn't "de facto that that person is entitled." Still, Dunlap is more than aware how this can play out. "For example, it can lead to resentment if one person is always the one picking up the tab, while another might feel uncomfortable or indebted because they’ve been helped financially," she says.

On the other hand, it can show up a little differently in families. She adds, "Issues like unequal inheritance or constant requests for financial help can lead to deep emotional tension. Money can also become a tool for power imbalances, where one person feels in control and the other feels dependent, and that can mess with trust and respect."

When certain negative patterns show up in relationships, it can make people decide to take a step back from being available. "And once distrust settles in, it’s hard to shake; nobody wants to be 'that friend' who’s forever dodging a Venmo request or getting side-eye from relatives at every family BBQ," West points out. How many times have you built up a wall with the people you love because of repeated unreliability or the expectation that you're supposed to help them whenever they ask? If you didn't hesitate to think of a moment, you're living proof that distrust can affect even the closest relationships.

Dunlap says, "When money becomes a main factor in a relationship, it can overshadow the connection, making it difficult to maintain genuine trust and understanding. You can avoid this by having open conversations with friends and family about your financial situation. Clear communication can help keep the focus on the relationship, not the money."

5. You Can Worry You're Not A Good Friend Or Family Member For Setting Money Boundaries

Worrying about how other people feel can keep us from setting boundaries. There's a difference between being an empath and a people pleaser, but it's easy to blur the lines. You can absolutely empathize with someone's hardship while knowing you're not in the position to lend the amount they may be looking for. I'm a huge fan of saying that two things can be true at once — because they can.

Irwin says you need to "address the conversation head on" if a friend does ask you for a loan. Your response may depend on if their ask was "emotionally-charged or "in an uncomfortable environment," but Irwin doesn't recommend ignoring it. If you're not in the space to respond, here's what she suggests saying in a "timely" fashion:

1. "Hey, I need time to think about this. Let me get back to you."
2. "We can help you, but here are our boundaries."
3. "We see and understand you, but we're unable to help because we're trying to pay off debt or save for _______."

Yes, Financial Boundaries Are Essential

Don't think you need to create financial boundaries for yourself and your friends? Think again. West says, "Establishing some ground rules is a lifesaver—think of it adding airbags to the friendship. Setting boundaries early on, like when you’re still in the happy, non-monetary part of the relationship, can protect both sides if things get sticky."

Here's how she advises you proceed with creating boundaries:

1. Keep it light and be honest; you’re not making a prenuptial agreement here, just letting them know you’d like to avoid “financial fireworks” later.
2. Say, “I’m your friend, not your ATM.” It’s funny but helps set the tone that your wallet isn’t a free-for-all.
3. Set a gift cap, such as, "I'm happy to chip in for brunch or a birthday, but let’s not get into home-loan territory.”
4. If you do lend, draw up a repayment plan. Think of it as adulting with a side of accountability to avoid “accidentally” becoming their financial fairy godmother.
5. Limit talk of big financial choices unless you’re genuinely invested together. After all, nobody needs to know how much their friend spends on avocado toast or scented candles, let alone home renos.
6. A little humor and some boundaries go a long way. You’ll save yourself a lot of awkwardness and keep the friendships intact, one “non-loaned” dollar at a time!

Tori says, "It's so important to have transparent conversations about money, set clear boundaries, and ensure that relationships are prioritized in any money exchange." Here are a few things you can try:

1. Communicate about your budget with a “gratitude sandwich.” Say you’re invited to an outing—a dinner, or a sports game—that isn’t within your budget right now. You can respond with the “gratitude sandwich.” The “pieces of bread” are positive, and the “meat” is the money thing you’re scared to say. Thank that person for the invite, let them know it’s not within budget right now, and then offer a cheaper alternative, reassuring them that you’d really love to see them. Offering an alternative reminds that person that declining their invitation isn’t about them, and you still care about them. In doing so, you prioritize your budget AND your relationship in the process.When in doubt, remember that no is a complete sentence. You don’t need to overcomplicate things, and sometimes a simple “no” is all you need.
2. Set expectations early. When planning trips with friends, discuss the budget and how costs will be split upfront. Having these conversations ensures that everyone is on the same page and helps avoid any misunderstandings. It creates a supportive, stress-free environment where everyone can enjoy the experience together without any added worries!

The Final Verdict:

Once you've weighed your options and considered what you need, you can decide to loan your friend money. However, Irwin wants you to consider being formal about it. "You can absolutely draft a promissory note or loan agreement so that your friend knows how serious you are about your boundaries. If you want, you can also put an interest rate on it," she says.

It's not to hurt your friend's feelings, but it is a boundary you can put in place so they think to themselves, "This is truly a loan because I'm borrowing money with the intent to pay it back," Irwin says. It could change the dynamics of your friendship, but it's more about being "purposeful about the language being used" so you and your friend can both move in the "right direction," according to Irwin.

If the idea of creating a 'loan agreement' sounds icky to you, Dunlap wants you to seriously consider it as "an extra bit of protection." She says all you need to do, again, is "try setting up a simple contract to outline repayment terms" because it "can help both of you stay on the same page and avoid misunderstandings down the road."

Her ultimate piece of advice? "Only lend what you're comfortable giving and potentially losing, and keep open communication to maintain trust and respect in the relationship."