10 Things No One Tells You About Parenting a Newborn

Unique Baby Names for Girls 

• Aria — All we can think about is, "Here comes Queen Aria," whenever we see this name. Similar to Arielle's name from The Little Mermaid, Aria is synonymous with something melodic.
  
• Iris — Just like the iris of your eye, this name means your daughter will more than likely have a bright and colorful personality!
• Maia — Instead of the traditional spelling of Mya, this name has Latin roots and means "great."
• Ayla — Your daughter will have sturdy characteristics thanks to her Hebrew name!
• Asha — Let your little girl's name remind you that there's much to be hopeful about.
• Naomi — Take a cue from famed model Naomi Campbell and let your daughter's name introduce her beauty to the world.

Gender-Neutral Unique Baby Names

• Campbell — This Scottish name means "beautiful field" so we're sure it means your son's being will be full of beautiful traits and perspectives .
• Reese — There's a reason why Reese Witherspoon has such a enthralling personality. Her name means "passion" and "enthusiasm."
• Greer — We can hear Beyoncé's song "Protector" playing when we say this name because it means "guardian."
• Lennon — There's a reason the world was so drawn to John Lennon's name. Lennon means "dear one" and we know that's how you'll feel about your newborn!
• Sterling — "Twinkle, Twinkle little star" has nothing on the name Sterling. On second thought, it could serve as your baby's unofficial theme song.

Unique Baby Names For Your Son

• Lennox — Trade the 'n' in Lennon for an X to get this Scottish name. It rolls off the tongue, making it easier for others to pronounce.
• Adler — Your little eagle is sure to soar high under your watchful eye.
• Rowan — Have a cute baby that was born with a head full of red hair? Name him Rowan which means "little Red one." While you're at it, check out these lucky Irish baby names for more ideas!
• Banks — If you feel drawn to water during your pregnancy, there's a good chance there's a reason why. Banks translates to "edge of the river."
• Rigg —Whether you choose this as your baby's first or middle name, it'll be easy for others to remember it!

1. Change your approach and mindset to organizing.

Unless cleaning and organizing makes you feel absolutely giddy, chances are...you dread doing it. This isn't a call-out because I'm right there in the trenches with you. I went from loving being a part of the cleaning process to realizing my mom intended to spend half of Saturday morning doing *just* that. Although I maintained the understanding that cleaning my space is necessary, I was never thrilled about it.

However, Ria said it's important to shift the way we think about cleaning. "I think the biggest reasons my kids look forward to helping me keep different parts of our home clean is because I make things fun. We're a very competitive household, so I make up games like 'who can clean the fastest,' so it doesn't make them feel I'm taking away time they want to spend doing something else."

2. Ask yourself why it's important for you to get organized.

Raise your hand if you've ever asked yourself why you didn't remember something or uttered, "How could I be so stupid?" First, here's a virtual hand-to-heart moment because I've done the same. Second, know that being clear about your reasoning for having an organized space is necessary for you to get started. "Maybe you feel you can't function unless things are perfectly organized and experience discomfort when they aren't," Ria said.

Reading the book helped me personally identify my main goals for wanting an organized space and I realized two things:

1. I want my apartment to feel peaceful.
2. I don't want to feel like I never know where anything is when I need it.

It may look completely different for you and that's totally okay. Ria's organization tips are designed in a way that help you tailor them to your needs.

3. Involve your partner or supportive village in the organization process.

Ria and I both agreed that there are tons of books about how to prepare for your baby's arrival, but there aren't many that shed light on truly helpful organization tips in the midst of it. It can be overwhelming when you realize all of the gifts or clothes you received during your baby shower have to find a place to go in your home. On top of it all, you probably didn't even think about discussing with your partner or supportive village, or ask them to help lighten your housework's load.

"When my first daughter was born, I wanted to do everything myself," Ria said. While it's cool to have an independent nature, it can lead to feelings of burnout. The Organized Home for New Parents outlines how to have conversations with the people in your life so everyone is able to effectively work together to provide support that goes beyond feeding the baby while mom takes a nap.

"Labeling things and letting your support system know where they are so they feel adequately equipped to help is one of the things I was adamant about putting in the book," said Ria. The fact she doesn't gloss over this section in Chapter 2 is so helpful, and serves as a conversation starter for those at different stages of parenthood.

4. Be open to pivoting as your children grow.

Although Ria wanted to specifically make sure new parents felt seen with her book, she wrote it in a way she hopes feels timeless. "Organization is never over. There's always going to be constant editing that occurs over time. Look, my kids are 8, 6, and 4 so I had no choice but to pivot," she said.

If you don't have small kids, The Organized Home for New Parents is still helpful because it can help you think about how you want to approach organizing in the different seasons of your life. You might not have to organize your kids' diapers anymore, but they're still going to wear other clothes that need to be folded and put away. And let's not forget the mountain of toys kids tend to accumulate over the years...*side eye*

5. Don't be afraid to find ways to optimize small spaces.

Regardless of where you live — house, townhouse, apartment, or otherwise — you probably have a few small spaces that you haven't figured out how to organize. They could be your kitchen drawers, a corner in your living room or even the small space on the side of your toilet that's collected random Amazon boxes. Yes...I'm speaking from experience.

The Organized Home helps you reimagine those spaces so that you're able to collect your overflow in a more organized way. One of these ways is by making use of a three-tier rolling cart. Since I built one of my own over the weekend, it's helped to transform my bathroom so that other essentials are securely stored there. Surprisingly, my toddler thinks it looks "cool" and even helped me put back his Boogie Wipes that were on it.

My final verdict of "The Organized Home for New Parents"

I'll be honest — I'm pretty critical of books geared towards parents because some feel like you're having a ton of instructions thrown at you. Although The Organized Home for New Parents is filled to the brim with actionable steps you can take to get your home organized, they're easy to digest and break down step-by-step. Ria said, "The goal isn't to tackle everything at once. Do what you can a little at a time to help lessen the chance you feel overwhelmed."

Taking her advice, I chose three areas of my apartment to clean this weekend, and I was able to organize my pantry and my toddler's bathroom station without feeling discouraged. I also didn't do everything in one day. Ria's tips are helping this mom communicate better about the household things I need help with, and the areas I've gotten around to organizing feel damn good to look at and walk into.

Take it from me, The Organized Home for New Parents by Ria Safford is worth buying and isn't another pretty book that's going to collect dust on your coffee table. You'll probably bookmark and annotate sections throughout it for years to come. Plus, it makes for a great gift for other moms in your life!

Purchase a copy (or two) of "The Organized Home for New Parents"

The Organized Home for New Parents

​In which episode does JJ die?

JJ dies at the end of Outer Banks season 4 episode 10, "The Blue Crown" after rescuing Kiara from his father Chandler Groff. "I feel mad, betrayed, disappointed and heartbroken to say the least," Bruder adds. "JJ went through a lot of crap through the show and he was the one character who deserved his happy ending the most. When the series first came out, people fell in love with JJ and [Kiara]."

While the cast obviously found out about the ending while filming, fans are frustrated with how they chose to promote the show. "Obviously the cast can’t spoil a character death, but to blatantly lie and mislead fans by saying that Jiara was 'evergrowing' and fans would be happy with how the season plays out?" Bruder says. "Jiara fans deserved so much better than what we got, ESPECIALLY when they knew they were killing JJ off."

Why are Outer Banks fans so upset?

The show is the kind of phenomenon that made instant stars out of its cast, but it also made waves because of how the first season portrayed issues like classism, substance abuse, and domestic abuse. "As someone who has been around domestic abuse, I think the handling of the character JJ was detrimental culturally," another fan (who would like to remain anonymous) says. "The character suffered abuse at the hands of a man who was not even his biological father, and the writers almost framed it as if that was okay because in the beginning, his father loved him. Instead of telling a story to victims of abuse about hope and making it through trials, the writers went the opposite way. I also find it interesting that they stated this was a planned death. I think writing a character who is suffering from anxiety and clear mental health issues as well as abuse who is very young like JJ only to let him fall in love and kill him right when he starts to feel happiness doesn’t necessarily make a lot of sense narratively."

Another viewer adds that ending JJ's story that way felt "disrespectful...especially when in an interview following the episode, one of the creators literally referred to his death as pointless." She even says "it feels almost like the show died along with him."

Actress Madelyn Cline (Sarah Cameron) called JJ the "heart of Outer Banks"and for a lot of fans, JJ also became a beacon of hope, a reminder that you can endure, persevere, and come out stronger on the other side. Since the first season of the show dropped during April 2020, it's been one consistent, fun thing for TV fans since the COVID-19 pandemic began, which makes the loss feel even greater.

"Seeing him die at the hands of another abusive father was honestly kind of sickening," the viewer adds. "It’s also unfortunate that his death didn’t seem to mean anything. A character death like this would be one thing if it meant something. If he had died protecting his friends or actively protecting Kiara, rather than having already saved her and then getting killed afterward, it might’ve be easier to get past."

"It’s like a connection to something good and steady was just broken," X user @onlykiep4l says. "Killing a character that has literally gone trough so much trauma and was finally happy just doesn’t make sense. It’s not just the character that’s gone — it feels like a part of the show has ended too."

Why does JJ get killed off?

Rumors have been circulating for years about behind-the-scenes drama between actors Rudy Pankow and Madison Bailey, which has fans believing Rudy asked to be written off the show(for the record, Outer Banks creators Josh & Jonas Pate and Shannon Burke have said it was the plan from the beginning). With Rudy's exit, the writers had a difficult choice in front of them. JJ isn't the kind of guy to abandon his friends, meaning the writers obviously felt like killing him was the only option. But according to an additional viewer, "Outer Banks hasn't been that type of show."

"To attempt to turn this fun, summer, boat show into some dark, depressing story where the heart of the show is gone destroys everything that the show started out as," she says.

Another anonymous fan calls the choice "a character assassination," adding other moments from the season that feel like a different character than the one fans have come to love: barely reacting to John B. and Sarah's pregnancy announcement, or to the fact Rafe had come to talk to Kiara — especially after his reaction to Rafe catcalling Kie in the first season is a moment that led fans to ship them in the first place.

The fan continues by calling JJ's treatment a "lack of respect" toward the character. "The fact that the writers tried to make us dislike him, to soften the blow of him dying. It didn’t work. It has everyone distraught because many people’s favorite character ended up dying after 'finding happiness' for about 10 minutes in Episode 10."

​Does Sarah get pregnant in Outer Banks season 4?

But JJ's death isn't the only moment that has fans reeling. In addition to the fact viewers are saying the Pogues barely reacted to the death of their lifelong best friend, Pope is now a murderer and Kiara makes an absolutely chilling vow to get revenge on Groff — a far cry from the characters we fell in love with in season 1.

"Outside of the JJ of it all, a lot of plot lines/dynamics in part 2 felt off," one of our anonymous fans continues. "Sarah’s pregnancy plot line, especially when coupled with the quote from a creator about ‘giving her a baby specifically because she wasn’t ready’ feels incredibly tone deaf given the current state of things here in the US. The fact that there wasn’t even a conversation of if she wanted to continue with the pregnancy felt very icky. Overall, episodes 1-4 of this season did feel like Outer Banks, but everything after that felt like it was from an entirely different piece of media."

However, some fans are excited to see where the show goes from here. "JJ was such a strong character and his presence will obviously be missed, [but] I am excited to see how the Pogues react and what they do to get revenge on Groff," Virginia McGrew says in an email. "I also think that the scene of JJ dying with Kiara was extremely well done and emotional, making his passing even sadder. I ultimately believe that JJ’s passing serves as a reminder of the themes the show."

"JJ made the group even more aware of friendship, the importance of chosen family, and loyalty, which was seen throughout the season and especially in the finale," she continues. "Now that he is gone, the other Pogues will have to step up even more, creating a shift in their dynamic. While many believe that Outer Banks might not be worth watching after this finale, I truly think that it is only going to get even deeper and more interesting."