What to Do If You’re in Love With Your Best Friend

On the spectrum of risky (like dating someone in the office) to reliable relationships, your tight friendship with your bestie is about as stable as they come. But beware if you start catching feelings for your BFF. On one hand, it could end up as the ideal Ron/Hermione situation; and on the other, you could find yourself facing a BFF breakup. To keep yourself sane and navigate this sticky situation, follow these six tips.

1. Consider their relationship situation. You know your best friend’s relationship status — even if it’s super complicated or they have a secret crush — better than anyone. Whether they’re single, totally tied down, or somewhere in-between, take note of their status if you’re thinking about them as more than a friend.

2. Respect their relationship situation. This is especially important if your friend is in a relationship or going through a tough breakup. While it might be tempting to try to uplift them during a hard time by telling them how amazing you think they are, make sure you’re not taking advantage of their vulnerable state or butting in on an already-existing relationship.

3.Differentiate your romantic feelings and platonic feelings. If you’ve started harboring feelings beyond friendship, make sure those feelings are truly rooted in attraction. Being friends with someone already means that you care about them way more than the average person, so it’s worth checking in with yourself to ensure that those romantic feelings really are there.

4.Don’t feel guilty. Once you’ve established that your feelings are romantic, don’t allow yourself to feel guilty for them. You can’t control what you feel. You can only control what you do about it.

5. Weigh your options. The hardest part about being attracted to your best friend is the fear of losing their friendship. You’re between a rock and a hard place. If you tell them and it doesn’t work out, your friendship might change; but if you choose not to tell, you’ll have the burden of your feelings and won’t be sure what could really develop between you two. The key is choosing the option that’ll stress you out the least.

6. Stick with your plan. Once you choose what to do — to tell or not to tell — fully accept that you decided that course of action for a reason. If you decide to share your feelings with your friend, believe that your friendship will stay intact if they truly are your best friend. But sure, things might feel awkward for a bit if they don’t feel the same way. Telling them can also have the biggest payoff ever. There’s a reason that some of the best love stories begin with friendships!

How have you dealt with having feelings for your bestie? Let us know @BritandCo!

(Photos via Getty)

Life comes at you fast when you're in love, while you're juggling career goals, pets, babies, friends, family, and whatever else folded in to your very, very filled cup. One minute you and your spouse can't enough of each other, but then time passes and you might start to feel like you're roommates. "Ugh, what is that about," is a question I used to ask when my own relationship's spark felt like tiny embers amongst our ever-growing responsibilities. Licensed psychotherapist Lucas Saiter, LMHC, owner and director of Manhattan Therapy NYC, says, "It's crucial for couples to acknowledge periods of disconnection without judgement."

According to him, you can start "by having an open conversation about feeling disconnected" which is a "positive step" in the desired direction. But, he wants this to happen during "a calm moment" instead of "during a conflict or when there are distractions."

The ultimate goal is for "each partner" to feel like they have "the opportunity to express their feelings openly and honestly, using 'I' statements to avoid blaming, while the other partner actively listens without interrupting or getting defensive," according to him.

8 ways to renew your marriage when you're busy checking off your to-do list

Your marriage isn't doomed because you feel like it's gotten off track. Saiter says, "Rekindling the spark in a marriage goes beyond physical intimacy; it's about creating emotional closeness and shared experiences. Couples can focus on deep, meaningful conversations that go beyond the day-to-day logistics."

1. If you don't cook often, surprise your spouse with their favorite dinner recipe.

cottonbro studio

Saiter says you or your spouse "can make time for small gestures of kindness and thoughtfulness, like cooking" each other's "favorite meal." We don't know everything, but we're aware that home-cooked meals mean a lot to some people. Eating out is fun, but seeing someone put time and effort into a meal for you feels more personal.

2. Allow your partner to sleep in while you handle bank runs, grocery shopping, and other chores.

Michael Burrows

One of the other ways to each other's heart is "...running errands to show love and appreciation," according to Saiter. This can look like letting your partner rest while you handle early morning visits to the bank or grocery store before traffic picks up on the weekend.

Setting aside time for shared hobbies or interests can also be incredibly rejuvenating. For instance, taking a class together, whether it’s cooking, dancing, or photography, can help in discovering new aspects of each other and create fun, shared memories.

3. Sign up for a dance or photography class together.

cottonbro studio

If you've been thinking about taking a cooking, wine, dance, or photography class together, now's the time to do so! Saiter says, "Setting aside time for shared hobbies or interests can also be incredibly rejuvenating." Before you roll your eyes because you think you and your spouse don't have anything in common anymore, take a step back to remember what it was like when you were dating.

You probably went on different dates like going to the bowling alley, visiting a pumpkin patch, or even taking a candle class together for fun. Doing this again "can help in discovering new aspects of each other and create fun, shared memories," according to Saiter.

4. Verbally share why you're grateful for each other.

Andrea Piacquadio

Yes, it's time for you and your spouse to remember why you chose to exchange vows. "...practicing gratitude by regularly expressing appreciation for each other's qualities and contributions can strengthen the emotional bond and bring back the warmth and closeness," Saiter says.

You can tell your partner you appreciate the times they've sensed something was wrong and knew just what to say to cheer you up. Also, you could simply thank them for remembering to take out the trash without you having to ask.

There's no rulebook that says expressing thanks for each other has to be elaborate and drawn out. It's just something to help you remember how much you see each other.

5. Set aside time to hold hands or cuddle everyday.

Pavel Danilyuk

If you or your spouse are experiencing a drop in your libido, physical intimacy be hard to navigate. Saiter says, "Overcoming a 'dry spell' requires open communication and a willingness to explore underlying issues." As difficult as it may be, don't be afraid to express concerns because "there are many feelings and unsaid wants underneath the 'dry spell,'" he adds.

Doing something as simple as "prioritizing physical, non-sexual touch" is one way way Saiter believes can help you and your spouse become close again. You do things like "holding hands, cuddling, or sharing a long hug," to add a little spark back to what you had.

6. Pencil in date nights.

Jep Gambardella

How many times have your or spouse asked, "Who has time for date night?" Wait, we don't want to know because chances are one of you have said it one too many times to count. Saiter says, "Planning regular date nights or weekends away can also help break the routine and create a sense of adventure in the relationship."

Communicating and being open to trying new things in the bedroom, like role-playing, using toys, or trying new positions, can also reignite the spark and make things exciting again.

You can also try revisiting places or activities that were significant earlier in your relationship to evoke nostalgic, passionate feelings and remind you both of your deep connection.

7. Let your adventurous side show in the bedroom.

Andrea Piacquadio

If one of you are comfortable initiating sex again, let your fun side call the shots. However, Saiter wants to make sure you're "communicating" before surprising your spouse. "...being open to trying new things in the bedroom, like role-playing, using toys, or trying new positions" is one of the ways he thinks you can reconnect behind closed doors. It's all about finding safe ways to "reignite the spark and make things exciting again," he shares!

8. Revisit the place you fell in love with your spouse.

Taylor Thompson

If you remember the exact time and place you knew your spouse was the one, Saiter suggests revisiting it to "evoke nostalgic, passionate feelings and remind you both of your deep connection." Whether it was at your local pizza parlor, the park, or even at a place like Disney World, find your why again.

My spouse and I are doing great after incorporating these tips, but how can we stay consistent?

Ba Tik

Saiter says, "Life gets busy, but it’s crucial to carve out time for each other. Treat it like any other important appointment—block off time in your schedule for date nights, family dinners, or just time relaxing together." Maybe you think it should sound so simple, but it is. Like Saiter says, you have to prioritize your marriage just like you do everything and everyone else.

Ways to help you do so are limiting "distractions by putting away phones and other devices" to "talk about your dreams, unwind together or simply enjoy each other's company," he adds. Still struggling?

"It might also be helpful to look over your daily responsibilities together to make sure the workload at home is shared fairly. Building a strong and fulfilling relationship takes effort and commitment. By prioritizing your partner, communicating openly, and making time for each other, you can strengthen your bond and reignite the spark," Saiter suggests.

All in all, Saiter believes "seeking couples counseling can be a great step toward getting the conversation flowing," if you and your spouse are still having trouble finding the spark in your marriage.

Visit more of our stories about relationships for dating, friendship, and family tips!

The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives totally dominated the reality TV space in 2024 — and season 2 is will be here before you know it. The show premiered on the Hulu on September 6, and quickly became the year's most-watched unscripted season premiere. Well, MomTok watchers: drop everything (except your phones) because Taylor Frankie Paul and Whitney Leavitt just teased a crazy season 2 of Secret Lives of Mormon Wives.

Here's what Taylor Frankie Paul and Whitney Leavitt said about The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives season 2.

Taylor Frankie Paul & Whitney Leavitt say season 2 is "better" than the first.

"With the second season, you're having conversations constantly with your peers and sitting in your interviews or confessionals where they're constantly asking you questions about yourself and about a scenario. It can be very therapeutic," Whitney Leavitt tells People.

Taylor Frankie Paul admits she has some nerves around filming season 2, considering they're not in total creative control. "It's exciting but I guess I'm always a bit nervous," she says. "We're used to making content that we can control and edit and we don't have control with this. It's nerve-wracking going into it knowing that what happens isn't exactly how the edit might make it look."

"But I do think this one is going to be just as good, if not better, than our first season," she continues. "So far, I think everything has been so fun and entertaining to experience for myself."

And one detail we'll see from both ladies in The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives season 2 are their new babies! Taylor Frankie Paul had her third baby Ever on March 19, 2024, and Whitney Leavitt gave birth to her third baby Billy on October 24, 2024.

"It was a beautiful moment that you'll see more of in season 2. I'm so thankful for him," Taylor says.

And they're still getting used to their 'Secret Lives of Mormon Wives' fame!

Despite their cult followings on social media, both women admit they're still getting used to their fame in the TV space, and how wildly successful the first season was. Taylor says she's "at a loss for words sometimes."

"I remember thinking, 'This will do okay. It should do well, given that we all have a story that people haven't heard about, and all of us do have a following," she adds. "I didn't know the extent of how well it was going to do, so it was shocking as it happened."

And it wouldn't be a show about MomTok without some surprising DM's! "The people that are in your messages reaching out, just unexpected people that you have fangirled over, we've all fangirled over," Taylor continues. "So that was really cool to see. And sometimes I just forget that people are out there watching it. It's a nationwide thing. To this day, I still don't think I even realize it, to be honest."

Maybe season 2 will reveal who's sliding in their DM's. 👀

Have you seen all of this month's incredible December TV shows? They make for the perfect weekend watch.

Having toxic friends, family members, or romantic partners in your life can feel like standing in the rain for hours on end. You usually feel drained of energy on top of being drenched in bad energy. Though it's clear you probably need to set boundaries, it's not always easy to decipher what you should say during a conversation where a narcissist is doing what they do best.

Clinical social worker, and Clinical Director of Villa Oasis San Diego, Michelle Beaupre, MSW, Ph.D., LCSW has helped clients navigate this very topic at different points in their lives and has 6 phrases you can say to either shut down a narcissist or let them know you're uninterested in their behavior.

6 things to say when a narcissist thinks they're getting the last word

1. What to say if your romantic partner makes you question whether you saw inappropriate texts on their phone

Alex Green

If I had things my way, gaslighting would be outlawed. Unfortunately, some people just can't seem to take responsibility for their actions, and they really love to make it everyone else's problem. Even more infuriatingly, it can appear in romantic relationships when one person is caught doing something that breaches the trust between them and their partner.

If your boyfriend or girlfriend spins a tale that makes you question what you’re sure you saw, try not to panic. Instead, take a page from Beaupre’s book. She suggests saying, “I’ll stand by what I know is true. If we need to agree to disagree, that’s fine, but I’m not going to let this change what I know or how I feel.”

She says doing this “shows them you’re not going to be swayed or pulled into their ‘game.’” It also helps “keep you grounded and firm, making it clear that their gaslighting isn’t going to work.” The more you stand your ground, the more someone is “less likely to continue trying to manipulate/control you,” according to her.

2. What to say when a friend keeps lying about their accomplishments

Pavel Danilyuk

This is a tricky one because you probably know one of your friends likes to embellish the truth a bit. It’s one of the things that used to be funny because they could always come up with a story on the spot. But, it can be confusing if you notice your friend tends to lie about something they’ve accomplished. Just don’t think you have to go out of your way to expose them though.

Beaupre says, “If it’s not harming anyone, sometimes it’s okay to leave it alone because, eventually, the truth will catch up to them anyway, and they will learn their lesson on their own.” But she says if you notice “their lies are causing major problems or hurting others,” speak up “gently.”

“You can ask them why they feel the need to lie, and if there’s something they’re struggling with that they might want to talk about,” she continues. Her suggestion is to say, “I’ve noticed that sometimes, you say things that don’t really add up, and I’m just wondering if there’s a reason. Is everything okay?”

3. What to say when someone complains about you setting boundaries

Pavel Danilyuk

If there’s one thing a narcissist can’t stand, it’s boundaries. If you know someone who has a tendency to overreact when you set them, Beaupre knows what you can say to them. “I’m not okay with how you’re reacting. If you can’t respect my limit, then I’m going to have to take a step back and distance myself,” she suggests.

She feels “this makes it clear that you’re serious about your boundaries.” Also, it signals that you “won’t let their reaction change what you need to feel respected, safe and secure.”

4. What to say if someone utters "I love you" after a few weeks of dating

Katerina Holmes

If only some of us would’ve asked this question during some of our prior relationships, we may have avoided unnecessary heartbreak. Should you find yourself faced with someone’s eager declarations of love early on, Beaupre wants you to “to be honest about how you feel and not feel pressured to say it back if you’re not ready.”

What you can say is, “Thank you. That means a lot, but I’m not there yet. Maybe one day, but not now.” By doing this, you’re not discrediting their emotions. Instead, you’re letting them “know you appreciate them and their feelings” while setting “the pace that works for you,” according to Beaupre. Please don't force yourself to feel something if you don't.

5. What to say when someone makes light of something or someone you're grieving

RDNE Stock project

This reminds us of one of the relationship red flags we recently dug into. We know why people say passive-aggressive things, but it's still painful no matter what the situation is. In the case of grieving, it's a hard no for us. Beaupre says, “In times like this, when you’re going through a lot of heavy emotions, it’s important to set a boundary for your peace.”

If you feel yourself questioning whether your feelings are valid, Beaupre says not to do that. "Don't let others downplay/dismiss what you’re feeling or going through, especially if it's something that's really taking a toll on you." What she urges you to say is, "I know you may not fully understand, but this is really important to me, and I need you to respect that.” In her opinion, it's a way of letting that person "know you're serious about protecting your emotional space without being confrontational."

And if they're still being a grade-A jerk about it? It may be time to limit the time you spend with them.

6. What to say if someone uses 'jokes' to constantly critique your appearance

SHVETS production

We think laughter is good for the soul, but not at the expense of hurting other people's feelings. This means no one should have the luxury of repeatedly commenting about the way you present yourself. Beaupre says, "If the way you look, what you’re wearing or how you speak isn’t hurting anyone, they really shouldn’t be commenting on it." Should you notice this unfortunate pattern in someone close to you, it's time to address it.

Beaupre wants you to try saying, "I’m fine with how I look and speak. You can let me know if there's a problem, but please don’t make me feel bad about it." That way, you can "set a clear limit about what you won't tolerate," according to her. She believes it's also a "chance to share any concerns without crossing into criticism or bullying."

Still, someone who refuses to stop disguising their obvious issues with you as harmless 'jokes' isn't someone who deserves a long-term spot in your life.

Scroll through more relationships stories to see how you should navigate everything from tense friendships to conversations about money.

I truly feel like I’ve been living under a rock when it comes to what’s good at Whole Foods. Turns out, they’ve been hiding some really impressive deals on groceries in the shadows, but I’m here to shed some light on ‘em. Whole Foods offers savings every week, and I’m fully convinced that my local Whole Foods will be seeing a whole lot more of me from now on.

Scroll on for details on Whole Foods’ top deals to shop starting today!

Kaboompics / PEXELS

1. BOGO 50% off packaged soups (Tuesdays)

Tuesdays and Fridays are the main days of the week that Whole Foods offers savings on their groceries. The first amazing deal for Tuesdays is BOGO 50% off packaged soups – perfect for this time of year!

They’ve got every kind of flavor from minestrone and chicken noodle to Italian wedding and broccoli cheddar. Their packaged soups average out at about $9 per 24-ounce tub, so saving 50% on one when you buy one is pretty good, especially for meal prep purposes.

Lukas / PEXELS

2. $2 off classic and organic rotisserie chickens (Tuesdays)

You can take $2 off two kinds of Whole Foods’ rotisserie chickens every Tuesday. Their classic rotisserie chicken goes for $9 while the organic version sells for $13. I love using rotisserie chicken for soups, sandwiches, wraps, and pastas, so getting a whole chicken to use for recipes all week long for just $7 is so nice!

Nadin Sh / PEXELS

3. $8 large cheese pizzas (Friday)

Sometimes you just do not feel like cooking on a Friday evening after work – that’s where this Whole Foods savings hack comes in! Every Friday, you can get a large cheese pizza for $8. While there’s nothing wrong with a plain cheese pizza (nostalgia galore!), I’d take advantage of this deal then bulk up my slices with various toppings like peppers, pepperoni, and olives.

Nadin Sh / PEXELS

4. 12 for $12 wild caught oysters (Friday)

Ooh, fancy! Every Friday, Whole Foods’ wild caught oysters go for $1 a pop. Buy a dozen for just $12, and you’re golden. This deal would be perfect for a bougie at-home date night.

Pixabay / PEXELS

5. BOGO 50% off packaged sushi rolls (Friday)

This is another great date night pick! Buy one packaged sushi roll, and get another 50% off on Fridays only. From rainbow rolls to California rolls, this Whole Foods savings hack has my cravings going crazy.

Minchephoto Photography / PEXELS

6. $10 family-sized tiramisu (Friday)

Got a hankering for a sweet treat? Don’t fret – you can shop a whole family-sized serving of tiramisu at Whole Foods for just $10 every Friday.

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7. $12 bottles of prosecco (Friday)

The death of the work week and start of the weekend is obviously a cause for celebration, and Whole Foods has you covered with $12 bottles of Presto prosecco every Friday. Cheers!

Subscribe to our newsletter to discover more deals!

If there’s one recipe you 100 percent need to crank out some seriously festive Christmas dessert ideas, it’s the classic, basic sugar cookie. Some of the most intricately ordained, masterpiece cookies (like pink Christmas decorations, jolly reindeer, and llamas) begin with a simple foundation. Let’s start with this recipe we love for a vanilla-bean-speckled version that’s sure to hold its own under all that royal icing.

Ingredients

  • 1 cup butter (room temperature + cubed)
  • 3/4 cup sugar
  • 2 teaspoons vanilla bean paste
  • 1 egg
  • 3 cups flour

Directions

Using an electric mixer, beat butter and sugar until light and fluffy, then add vanilla bean and egg. Mix until just incorporated. Stop mixer and scrape down the sides of the bowl with a spatula.

Gradually add flour (you may not need the full three cups), and mix until dough forms and pulls away from the bowl. Divide dough into two even discs and wrap in cling wrap, then refrigerate for at least two hours or overnight.

When ready to roll dough, pre-heat oven to 350°F and line baking trays with parchment paper or silicone baking mats.

Using a rolling pin, roll cookie dough between two pieces of parchment paper to 1/4-inch in thickness, and use cookie cutters to cut out cookie shapes.

Transfer cookies to a baking tray using a lightly floured spatula. Refrigerate for 10-15 minutes before baking.

Bake for approximately 15 minutes, or when edges begin to brown. The time will be dependent on size and thickness of cookies.

Allow to cool on tray until warm to touch, then transfer onto a wire cooling rackbefore decorating.

Decorate your easy Christmas cookies to you and your family's liking!

Check out our baking and cooking classes for more recipes to make at home!

Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

See our ‘Grammable Holiday Cookie Guide.

Recipe via Vickie Liu; photos via Brittany Griffin/Brit + Co