This Is the Desktop Instagram Hack You Should Know About

Why do people want to share their relationship status with others?

My sister used to ask me this question when I was in my 20's, and I always looked at her like she had two heads growing. I couldn't fathom the idea that people wouldn't want to talk about their relationship online because it felt like everyone was doing it. I mean, a study from Pew Research Center shows 8 in 10 people on social media see relationship posts, so it clearly wasn't outrageous to think it was normal.

But, that still doesn't answer why people are drawn to sharing cute little updates about their partner or relationship. Luckily, Bray has a good indication of what drives people to give others a sneak peek into their lives. "People share their relationship status for all kinds of reasons. Some want to mark their territory — nothing says 'back off' quite like a cute couple selfie! Others are just excited and proud of their partner and want to share the joy," she says. That stems from people's "need for a sense of belonging or to receive positive reinforcement from others," she adds.

But, this doesn't necessarily make people weird. It's just human nature that makes us act the way we do. "We as humans are just hard wired to seek connection, and broadcasting our connections, makes us feel more accepted and secure in our social lives."

Should couples have conversations about their social media expectations?

I don't care how hot you think someone is, you're going to have to learn how to communicate with them. It's true even if your chemistry is off-the-charts because healthy relationships don't fall out of the sky. They're built via honesty, respect, forgiveness, and other important factors.

Before assuming your partner is or isn't okay with you posting about your relationship, Bray is 100% convinced you should talk things through. "Social media is still in the wild west of relationship etiquette, and without discussions, assumptions about 'correct' behavior can run wild," she hints. For example, you could be happily posting about your partner only for someone to point out that they're not following you on social media.

"Some people are super private, while others practically live their lives online. Misunderstandings happen when expectations aren't laid out so talking about it can prevent messiness in the long run," Bray observes.

If two people have gone on a couple of dates, should one of them be upset if the other isn't publicly talking about them?

So, you swiped right on Tinder or Bumble, and you had a few amazing dates with one of your matches. Before you start publicly declaring your love for them, Bray wants you to reconsider. "Hold on! It's just a few dates! Let’s pump the brakes. The early stages of dating is not the time to make grand social declarations," she declares. As someone who tried to 'date' people from Tinder, those first few dates aren't a guarantee that you've found the love of your life.

"Posting someone on social media can feel like a big step to some people so expecting that level of public commitment too soon might be too much pressure. If you’re already thinking, 'Why haven’t they posted about me yet?' after two dates, it might be a good time to check in with yourself about where those expectations are coming from," advises Bray.

I've recovered from my former, "Is he the one" obsession so also take it from me — see where things go first and then refer back to question #2!

Is it a red flag if someone doesn't post their partner on social media?

It would be so much fun if we personally had Dustin Poynter, the flag guy, from TikTok helping point us in the right direction — but this is one of those things that errs on the subjective side. Though Bray doesn't feel it's necessarily healthier to keep your relationship private, she thinks "context matters." "Some people are just more private or feel weird about social media in general," she says.

But, that doesn't mean certain behaviors don't warrant a few eyebrow raises. She notes," If someone is super active on social—like posting about their dog’s morning routine and every cupcake they’ve ever had—but doesn't ever mention their partner, it could create a need for a deeper conversation." Before you feel justified about grilling your partner — as satisfactory as that may feel — take a second to breathe.

Bray would prefer you work to understand "why they don't post, rather than assuming your partner is keep you a secret." If you discover the latter to be true, follow your instincts and let that person go because you don't deserve that!

Do you think it's healthier for couples to keep certain aspects of their relationship private?

Everyone has a different view of what makes a romantic relationship healthy, so this is one of those things Bray says, "absolutely depends on the couple" because some "genuinely enjoy sharing their lives online." You've probably seen your share of couples who make cute content together whether they're married or not. I'd be lying if I said I don't specifically keep up with a few whose content makes me smile.

But, other couples may not be interested in sharing their relationship online because they "want to be private and keep the relationship free from the judgements or opinions of others," according to Bray. That's not to say they have something to hide, though. Instead, think of it as a personal preference.

"As long as both partners are on the same page and it’s not a source of tension, it’s all about finding the balance that works for them. If it starts to feel like a performance for likes rather than genuine connection, though, that’s where it can become problematic," Bray reminds.

How can someone bring up their partner's posting habits without sounding accusatory?

You may feel eager about posting about your partner while they're less enthusiastic and this could make you feel upset. It's easy to jump to conclusions when you're already upset, but Bray feels "tone is everything." Ironically, she suggests something I've heard in therapy sessions and that's "to be curious, not confrontational." Hopefully this stopped you in your tracks if you were ready to give your partner a piece of your mind.

"You can say something like, 'Hey, I’ve noticed we haven’t shared much about each other on social media? What’s your take on sharing stuff about us online?' It’s important to frame it as a mutual exploration of rather than a demand for a public declaration," Bray points out.

What would you tell someone who wants to emulate couples who consistently post content together?

We've all seen couples who we think have the cutest relationship, even though we've never met them before. As much as you may admire a couple, Bray thinks it's a "slipper slope" if you want to try to recreate their online moments. "I’d encourage someone to focus more on what makes their own relationship feel fulfilling, rather than chasing #couplesgoals," she encourages.

However, this isn't a sign that you're not supposed to ever share anything about your partner or relationship! "If posting together feels fun and real, go for it! But if it starts feeling like a performance or that you are in competition with other couples, it's probably good to take a step back," she warns.

Also, keep in mind that social media doesn't show you every single moment of couples' lives so don't worry about trying to look picture perfect based on a 30 second to 30 minute video.

Christmas Appetizer Ideas

Bacon Pastry Twists with Beer Cheese

While cradling a cocktail in one hand, an easy-to-grab appetizer is essential. These flaky, cheesy bacon twists are both easy and delicious to dunk in a three-cheese beer dip. (via Brit + Co)

Sun-Dried Tomato Pesto Bites

A red and green holiday treat without sugary sprinkles? Count us in. These phyllo shells are filled with whipped pesto cream cheese and topped with basil and sun-dried tomatoes for some yummy Christmas food. (via Well Plated by Erin)

Cranberry Goat Cheese Balls

These cranberry goat cheese balls are the perfect balance of salty and sweet — a definite crowd-pleaser for any Christmas dinner! (via Chef Genevieve)

Holiday Crostini Trio

Spread avocado, mascarpone, and provolone onto toasted baguette slices for a tasty appetizer, and top away for three versatile holiday food ideas that will please any palate at your holiday party. (via The Baking Fairy)

Honey Almond Baked Brie

Add this this gooey, sweet, and salty baked brie to your Christmas dinner menu and guests will gather around it like it's a fireplace on a cold day. (via The Seasoned Mom)

Christmas Food Ideas For Side Dishes

Sesame Shrimp Pastry Puffs

The seafood lover in your home will be elated to munch on these sweet and umami-rich (thanks to the oyster sauce) sesame shrimps blanketed in buttery puff pastry. You'll definitely want to add this dish to your best Christmas recipes list! (via Brit + Co)

Cheesy Sweet Potato Gratin

This savory combination of sage, gruyère cheese, and heavy cream is here to make sweet potato casserole even more indulgent. This is definitely one of our favorite Christmas dinner ideas. (via Brit + Co)

Healthy Butternut Squash Salad

Fill your guests' bellies with the seasonal flavors of butternut squash, apple cider, and pecans. The bacon is just the icing on the cake, so to speak. (via Sarah Anderson for Brit + Co)

Romanesco Christmas Trees with Parmesan "Snow"

Turn Romanesco broccolis into snow-capped trees with just six ingredients in this healthy yet cheesy dish for your next party. (via Brit + Co)

Slow Cooker French Onion Soup

Nothing will warm you to your toes quite like a good soup, and whipping one up in the slow cooker can save you time, mess, and energy. This French onion creation is a perennial favorite. (via Brit + Co)

Waffle Iron Latkes

These latkes make the perfect addition to any celebration, and the best part is how easy they are! From an apple butter topping to pomegranate and Greek yogurt, there's something for everyone. (via Brit + Co)

Cornmeal Biscuits with Cheddar, Chives, and Jalapeños

These slightly spicy biscuits are ideal for soaking up all that gravy goodness. (via Brit + Co)

Taco Salad

Okay, you might be thinking, "why in the world would someone serve taco salad at Christmas?" But hear us out – this recipe is full of delicious veggies, and it's just brimming with color. Keep things red and green to stay festive, or go all-out with every color of the rainbow. (via The Girl on Bloor for Brit + Co)

Crispy Leaf Potatoes with Rosemary Butter

If ever there were a bulletproof case for buying a mandoline, it's these potatoes, which are sliced chip-thin, layered upright in a baking dish, and gloriously bathed in salty rosemary butter. (via Rasa Malaysia)

Cozy Pumpkin Curry

If you're looking for vegan Christmas recipes, look no further than this warming, insanely delicious, and seasonal pumpkin curry. Just leave out the fish sauce to make it fully plant-based! (via Sarah Anderson for Brit + Co)

5-Ingredient Christmas Salad

A complicated salad is the last thing you need to worry about when picking out Christmas dinner recipes. This palate-cleansing dish is simply butter lettuce, pomegranate seeds, and a white wine vinaigrette. (via My Kitchen Love)

Main Dish Ideas For A Christmas Feast

If you're tasked with cooking the bird this holiday season, look no further than this foolproof roast turkey recipe. (via Brit + Co)

Beef Short Ribs with Vegetables

Make a statement with a delicious short rib recipe that's cozy, filling, and features an unbelievable wine sauce. Everyone will be talking about it until next Christmas. (via Baldacci Family Vineyards for Brit + Co)

Cranberry Glazed Turkey

Make your turkey extra-special with a delicious cranberry-pomegranate glaze everyone is sure to adore. (via Sarah Anderson for Brit + Co)

Roasted Chicken with Carrots

For a Christmas dinner or otherwise, every home cook needs a roast chicken recipe in their back pocket. Start with this step-by-step recipe, which shows you how to stuff, truss, roast, and baste the bird until juicy and golden brown. (via Simply Recipes)

Prosciutto-Wrapped Pork Loin with Apple and Rice Stuffing

This dish combines a classic holiday side with a crowd-pleasing main, and it's wrapped in prosciutto for a show-stopping finish. (via Host The Toast)

Creamy Tortellini Vegetable Soup

Pasta doesn't get enough credit when it comes to holiday recipes, but nothing's cozier than a delicious bowl of warm tortellini. Except tortellini soup, that is! (via Half Baked Harvest for Brit + Co)

Roast Beef Tenderloin with Mushrooms and White Wine Cream Sauce

This melt-in-your-mouth holiday meal is cooked in one pan in under an hour. Sauté mushrooms in an oven-safe skillet, put the beef on top, roast, rest, and make a cheesy, herby cream sauce with the pan drippings. (via Half Baked Harvest)

Turkey Roulade with Apple Cranberry Stuffing

This dish is all about texture, from the crispy bacon coat to the tender turkey in the middle and soft stuffing interior. This is one Christmas dinner recipe you won't want to miss out on. (via Boulder Locavore)

Delicious Christmas Dessert Ideas

Keto Eggnog

Got guests who are committed to the low-carb lifestyle? This keto eggnog is the perfect dessert to serve the carb-conscious. (via Annelies Zijderveld for Brit + Co)

Peppermint Bark

This easy peppermint bark recipe is so simple to make, you'll have plenty of time on your hands for more ambitious endeavors — like cooking the turkey. (via Jessica Smith Wall for Brit + Co)

Holiday Puppy Chow

Your go-to sweet treat gets a festive upgrade when you add in red and green candy! Bonus points if you have a red or green bowl to put it in. (via Brit + Co)

Jacques Torres' Chocolate Chip Cookies

No surprise here: the secret to Torres' high-quality chocolate chip cookies is high quality ingredients, like butter, flour, and chocolate. Letting the dough age for 24 hours and sprinkling it with sea salt at the end doesn't hurt, either. (via Jacques Torres for Brit + Co)

3-Ingredient Peanut Butter Cookies

When it's your first year hostessing, the simpler you can keep your Christmas dinner recipes, the better. That's why we're huge fans of these 3-ingredient vegan Christmas cookies. (via From Eat Your Feelings by Lindsey Smith for Brit + Co)

Baked Hot Chocolate Donuts

Donuts are an all-purpose treat that can serve as Christmas breakfast, brunch, or dessert. This baked hot chocolate-inspired version doesn't require any special tools to make and is uber delicious. (via Half Baked Harvest for Brit + Co)

Dulce de Leche Cream-Filled Churro Donuts

These six-ingredient donuts, made with biscuit dough, have a cinnamon-y exterior and a rich dulce de leche filling that pairs wonderfully with Mexican hot chocolate. (via Brit + Co)

Eggnog French Toast

Another recipe you can serve as a Christmas dinner or brunch is this sweet French toast. The secret to nailing that 'nog flavor is the nutmeg and vanilla combo. Yum. (via St Pierre Bakery for Brit + Co)

Easy Vegan Slow Cooker Hot Cocoa

Give your oven and your plates a break and add this dairy-free hot chocolate to your easy Christmas dinner menu, or enjoy with Christmas waffles! Add all ingredients to the slow cooker, and let the gadget do the rest for you. (via Justina Huddleston for Brit + Co)

Champagne Ice Cream

This egg-free, celebration-worthy holiday dinner idea gets its creaminess from cream cheese and, better yet, its booziness from sparkling wine. (via Brit + Co)

Cinnamon Roll Pecan Pie

We call this pie holiday crack for a reason (or two): the pie crust is made of mini cinnamon rolls and the pecan filling is buttery on the verge of illegal, which definitely makes it one of our favorite holiday dishes. (via Brit + Co)

Easy Spiced Hot Fruit Bake

Hear that? That's a scoop of ice cream begging to top this sweet tray of apple, pear, cranberry, pineapple, and gluten-free dessert. (via Cotter Crunch)