Here’s Why Dancing Is Good for Your Brain

Are there really assigned roles in friend groups or am I just imagining things?

Like I said before, it can seem like you and your friends unintentionally gravitate toward certain 'roles.' It's not like anyone woke up one day and decided, "I'm going to be the 'mother hen' of the group," but it tends to happen. Why?

Paruolo says, "In my clinical work, I've consistently observed that our friendship roles often mirror our early family dynamics. These patterns show up naturally — think about who in your friend group gets the first crisis call, who plans all the gatherings, or who everyone turns to for emotional support." I'm willing to bet you thought of a name for each scenario — including yours — because I know I did!

"Like in families, we each fall into specific roles that feel familiar to us," Paruolo further explains.

What actually makes someone an empathetic person?

There's so many definitions for empathy, but I thought it would be wise to ask a licensed professional for her opinion on the matter. "Empathy means to feel what others are feeling. You do not have to have a personal direct experience with something to feel empathy for another person," shares Paruolo.

For example, your friend could call to tell you she has to have fibroid removal surgery and is feeling scared. You may have never had surgery, but you could find yourself feeling the need to comfort her in spite of this. Paruolo says, "The cool thing about our brains is that we have mirror neurons, which means part of our brain is set up to feel what others feel. The ability to attune to others' emotional states comes naturally to some people, while others may need to develop this capacity more consciously."

To break it down even further, here's signs that Paruolo says point to your empathetic nature.

Physical Signs:

• Getting physically exhausted after being in crowds
• Feeling drained after social interactions, even enjoyable ones (OMG I feel so seen!)
• Needing extra time alone to recharge

Emotional Signs:

• Absorbing other people's emotions like a sponge
• Feeling anxious or overwhelmed in emotionally charged environments
• Finding it hard to watch violence or cruelty in movies/TV

Social Signs:

• Feeling responsible for others' happiness
• Having trouble saying "no" to people who need help

Mental Signs:

• Picking up on subtle changes in others' moods
• Being highly attuned to body language and tone
• Finding it hard to distinguish your feelings from others' feelings

It sounds like I'm the empathetic friend, but are there any downsides to this?

I've been an empath for as long as I can remember and I've found that I have to 'recharge' my social batteries at times. I thought it was because I was trying to be superwoman by fixing others' problems, but it turns out theres more to it than that. Paruolo says, "Empathetic friends and people have an uncanny ability to sense others' emotional states even when unspoken, and frequently need recovery time after intense social interactions. They tend to be deeply affected by others' experiences and naturally consider situations from multiple perspectives."

In the long run, she says it can be "distressing" for some people to always feel the feelings of others. Over time, she says, "it can cause you to shut down and retract." This can look like not being as quick to respond to the funny memes your friends send you or not even answering their phone calls right away.

But, this doesn't mean you're the only person who tends to go through this. "Many empaths struggle with maintaining boundaries due to their deep emotional attunement," she says. Color me guilty because this sounds so much like me. It got so bad at one point that my sister nicknamed me 'Captain Save-A-Lot,' which is actually the clean version of what she truly meant. Still, empathy fatigue is no laughing matter nor does it mean you're defected. You just have the natural ability to show people their feelings are important to you.

How can I protect my peace as the empathetic friend?

You know you need to set boundaries, but what does that mean? Paruolo says, "The key is understanding that empathy needs to be balanced with compassion - it's not just about feeling others' emotions but also knowing how to help without depleting yourself."

One of the things she loves to do is "encourage empaths to set clear boundaries around their emotional availability and make time for regular grounding exercises." As with gratitude journaling, try to focus on an activity that calls for you to be present. Focus on what you can hear, see, touch, taste, and smell.

"Self-care isn't just a luxury; it's essential maintenance for empaths. This might mean scheduling alone time, finding a supportive therapist, or joining communities where you can process your experiences," Paruolo implores.

I know how to be there for others, but how do I ask for emotional support when I need it?

You may feel like it's impossible to ask others for help since your shoulders are the ones people cry on, but you're only doing yourself a disservice by not speaking up. No one's super resilient or able to handle all of their distressing feelings alone. We're not meant to.

It's the reason Paruolo wants you to speak up about what you need. "The most effective approach I've seen is being direct about your needs rather than hoping others will figure them out," she says. I made this mistake during postpartum and found myself expecting my family & friends to know exactly how I felt, but they're not mind readers. The more I verbally asked for help with little or big tasks, the more my mental and emotional load lightened.

Paruolo wants you to look at "asking for support as strengthening your friendships through trust and vulnerability, instead of waiting until you're overwhelmed." By the time you reach that point, you'll be ready to enter rage or full-blown shut down mode and they're not fun.

Avoid unlocking their proverbial doors by scheduling "regular check-ins with trusted friends," suggests Paruolo. "This creates a sustainable support system and helps prevent emotional crisis points.

A Gratitude Journaling Idea For When You're Worried About The Future

Write Down 5 Things You're Grateful You Can See, Touch, Hear, And Smell

This is actually a practice I picked up in therapy to help redirect my anxious thoughts. It's something I often refer to when I'm fixated on the future and things that might happen. Any time you feel yourself not being present because you're worried about what's next, focus on things that are immediately in front of you or around you.

For example, here's what's reminding me to be present:

• I can hear one of my favorite gospel songs playing and the subtle humming I'm doing.
• I can see two lime green books on my desk.
• I can smell the clean laundry my fiancé took out of the dryer.
• I'm touching the keys on my keyboard as I type this.

Gratitude Journaling Idea For When You're Experiencing Sadness

Write Down 3 Things You're Grateful For Today

Practicing gratitude when you're sad isn't so you can pretend the sadness doesn't exist. It's a very real emotion that calls for us to be curious about why we're feeling that way. However, if you feel like you're 'stuck' in your sadness, you can try writing down 3 things you're grateful for right now. Again, they don't have to be grandiose. They just have to make sense to you.

You could be grateful for:

• Eating a delicious meal
• Having a good night's sleep
• Hearing your favorite song at the right moment
• Morning snuggles with your pet or toddler
• Having access to binge watch your favorite TV show when you need to escape reality for a bit

Write Down The People You're Grateful You Can Rely On

My hope is that everyone has at least one person they can rely on during difficult moments in life. I know everyone doesn't have huge villages for different reasons, but I'd rather focus on who is there.

This gratitude journaling idea doesn't require you to go in depth about why you're grateful for the people in your corner unless you want to. You can simply write their names down if that's all you have the bandwidth for.

Recount A Memory That Always Makes You Smile

When in doubt, think about a moment that was hilarious or filled you with joy. It can be from your childhood, first year in college, or even your wedding day! The one memory that always makes me smile is from an interesting moment I told one of my uncles he looked like Santa Claus. I was around 5 or 6 years old, so it was a super innocent comment, but still it was hilarious nonetheless. No one in my family has let my uncle or me forget that moment. It's small, but it's one of the memories I'm grateful I can remember when I'm feeling sad.

A Gratitude Journaling Idea For When You Feel You're Not Doing Enough

Write Down 1 Thing You've Grateful You've Accomplished

I know some journal prompts ask you to list multiple things you've recently accomplished, but I've found that makes me a little more anxious that necessary. If this sounds like you, I see you and think it's just as impactful to be grateful for one thing you've done that you're proud of. It could be as simple as:

• "I had the strength to get out of bed today after wanting to do nothing more than hide under the covers."
• "I did laundry and put everything away."
• "I made myself a meal instead of ordering lunch like I usually do."
• "I stuck to my budget this week."
• "My presentation at work or school went really well."
• "I made that scary phone call I've been putting off."
• "I went for a walk around my neighborhood or local park."

Ariana Grande & Ethan Slater's Full Relationship Timeline

Late 2022 — Ariana Grande & Ethan Slater Meet While Filming Wicked

After Ariana and Ethan were both cast in Jon M. Chu's Wicked, the movie began filming in early December. Ariana Grande was cast as Glinda, while Ethan Slater got the role of Boq, one of Glinda's Shiz University classmates.

March 27, 2023 — Ariana Grande & Ethan Slater Were "All Over Each Other"

Ariana and Ethan reportedly could get enough of each other at Michelle Yeoh's Oscars party. A source told The Daily Mail later that summer that "They were seen making out at a pub in Hampstead, and they were all over each other at Michelle Yeoh's Oscar party."

July 2023 — Ariana Grande & Ethan Slater Split From Their Partners And Start Dating

News of Ariana's split from her then-husband Dalton Gomez broke on July 17, while TMZ also reported Ethan filed for divorce from his wife at the time, Lilly Jay, on July 26. (Ariana and Dalton ended up filing for divorce in September).

After People reported Ariana and Ethan were now in a relationship of their own, Lilly told Page Six that “[Ariana’s] the story, really. Not a girl’s girl. My family is just collateral damage.” However, other sources claim Lilly and Ethan had been separated for a couple months before his relationship with Ariana started.

August 2, 2023 — Ethan Slater & Ariana Grande Are Moving Fast

Ariana Grande and Ethan Slater reportedly fell head over heels so quickly, their friends were telling them to pump the breaks. “Ariana’s been told it’s too soon to go public with him and to take things slower,” said an Us Weekly insider at the time. “She’s very aware of how she’s perceived by her fans, and she’s trying to be mature. [But] if it were up to her, she’d be seen with him tomorrow.”

September 4, 2023 — Ariana Grande & Ethan Slater Are Learning How To Balance Their Relationship

Sources told People at the beginning of September that the costars and couple are trying to figure out how to balance their relationship with their celebrity.

“While this entire situation has been blown out of proportion, it’s much different than what has been portrayed in public,” a friend of the couple says. “They are just trying to navigate their new relationship in private."

Another reemphasizes that Ariana and Ethan only started dating after they were separated from their spouses, while a third adds, “They are doing their best to balance the fact that they are in the public eye with the desire to be respectful to all parties involved.”

September 2023 — Ethan Slater & Ariana Grande Go To Disney World

Surrounded by their friends and family, the Wicked movie stars headed for a day at the happiest place on earth. "They went with a big group of friends as well her mom and brother," a source told People. The source also said they're "really happy and really good for each other. All of her friends love him."

October 31, 2023 — Ariana Grande Supports Ethan Slater's Spamalot

Ariana Grande showed up to support her boyfriend for Spamalot's opening night at Broadway's St. James Theater.

December 23, 2023 — Ariana Grande & Ethan Slater Grab Dinner In New York City

To celebrate the holidays, Ariana and Ethan headed out to a nice Italian dinner, reportedly with Ari's dad Ed Butera. "They love to support each other in their work," a source told People. "When she’s done with work, Ariana loves going to the theater when she can."

Considering she's a musical girlie, and has been on Broadway herself, I totally believe Ariana heads to the theatre whenever she gets a chance!

December 28, 2023 — Ariana Grande Says She Feels "Deeply Misunderstood"

“I’ve never felt more at the mercy of and in acceptance of what life was screaming to teach me,” Ariana Grande said in an Instagram story. “I have never felt more pride or joy or love while simultaneously feeling so deeply misunderstood by people who don’t know me, who piece whispers together and make what they want out of me and their assumptions of my life.”

A source also told People that the popstar is “serious with Ethan. She loves being with him."

January 12, 2024 — Ariana Grande Releases "Yes, And?"

In a line heard 'round the world, Ariana Grande's "Yes, And?" (the lead single from her Eternal Sunshine album) begs the question, "Why do you care so much whose d—k I ride?" The song doesn't mention Ethan by name, but there's a lot of room to infer.Although, when the album releases in March, Ariana also talks about a new "interaction" on “Intro (End of the World)," and wonders "if he’s judgin’ me like I am right now."

September 30, 2024 — Ariana Grande Defends Ethan Slater

In a Vanity Fair cover story, Ariana opened up about the reaction to her relationship with Ethan Slater, revealing that “the most disappointing part was to see so many people believe the worst version of [the story]."

“There couldn’t be a less accurate depiction of a human being than the one that the tabloids spread about him,” she says. “No one on this earth tries harder or spreads themselves thinner to be there for the people that he loves and cares about. There is no one on this earth with a better heart...I’m 31 years old and I’m not a perfect person, but I am definitely deeply good, and I’m proud of who I’m becoming. I will never let disreputable evil tabloids ruin my life or my perception of what is real and good.”

October 30, 2024 — Ethan Slater Finally Speaks Out About His Relationship With Ariana Grande

Almost two years after meeting Ariana Grande, Ethan Slater finally opened up about their relationship in a new interview with GQ. “Obviously, it was a really super big year and I think there was something that was really difficult about things in your private life being commented on and looked at by the public," he says. "There were a lot of big changes in private lives that were really happening, so it’s really hard to see people who don’t know anything about what’s happening commenting on it and speculating, and then getting things wrong about the people you love. So just to address that part of it, that feels really hard."

But the clouds also came with silver linings. “Of course, it was an amazing year and a really beautiful thing, and I’m just really excited," he continues. "I’m just really, really proud of Ari and the work she’s done on this. She’s poured herself into it. I’m really proud that I got to be there for that part of it, and I’m really excited to be there for this next step of it when the world gets to see the amazing thing that she did.”

November 3, 2024 — Ariana Grande & Ethan Slater Go Instagram Official

These two took their relationship to the next level in the modern dating age — they put it on the grid. Well, not exactly. In Instagram posts celebrating the Australian premiere of Wicked, Ariana and Ethan both shared a picture of themselves. Is it blurry? Sure. Are their faces in it? No. But does this still count as an Instagram hard launch? Absolutely.

November 5, 2024 — Ethan Slater & Ariana Grande Pack On the PDA During Wicked

And after taking photos for the new Wicked movie in Sydney, Australia, Ethan and Ariana were more than happy, walking with their arms around each other and big smiles on their faces! And during the LA premiere of the film, Ariana was seen fixing Ethan Slater's bow tie.

November 11, 2024 — Ethan Slater Praises Ariana Grande's Comedy Acting Chops

In an exclusive interview with Brit + Co, Ethan Slater couldn't stop hyping up Ari's humor. And if you saw her hosting SNL, then you definitely understand. "I cannot wait for like the roll out of everything that Bowen said that isn't in the movie, or Ari, honestly, said that isn't in the movie. Just take after take," he says. "The moments where somebody broke, it was always great. There's one that's seared into my memory of, in Doctor Dillamond's classroom, I don't remember what Ari said but she got Cynthia [Erivo] and it's just the two of them across the way and they're staring at each other and she got her so good. There's something really wonderful about breaking. It's delightful."

He also praised Ariana and Cynthia for how they welcomed the rest of the cast their first days on set. "[They] would hug everyone who came in," he continues. "This huge movie is something that we've been waiting for for 20 years on a big scale with the biggest stars in the world, it could have felt really intimidating and it felt really familial immediately."