Why Young Millennials Actually Want More Traditional Marriage Roles

Women have fought hard decade after decade to make society a more equitable place for us, from the workplace to the home to even just walking around on the sidewalk. Given the highly visible work for women’s rights, it’s easy to assume that most women are on the same page on this issue, even if some men lag behind. But a new study flips this assumption on its head, revealing that among young millennial men and women, both feel that men should be the main earners AND decision-makers in the home.

The study, Trending Towards Traditionalism? Changes in Youths’ Gender Ideology, led by Joanna Pepin, a PhD student of sociology at the University of Maryland and co-authored by Dr. David Cotter of Union College, examined 40 years of data on the attitudes of high school seniors’ views on family, relationships, and work.

Cotter and Pepin note in their report that while we might expect each generation to get more progressive than the last, today’s young millennials are reaching back in time when it comes to women’s roles at home. However, they ALSO believe that women should be equal to men in the workplace.

So what gives?

According to the study, 42 percent of high school seniors in 1994 felt that it was to the benefit of families for men to be the breadwinners while women cared for the home. This number increased 15 percentage points to 58 percent in 2014. This means more than half of high school seniors want traditional gender roles in the home. There has also been a return to the idea that men should make all the important decisions for a family.

In an email to Brit + Co, Pepin explains that while one might expect ideas about workplace equality and equality at home might progress together, that just isn’t the case with today’s young people. Pepin tells us that the study shows that high schoolers think men and women should be on equal footing at the office, but as soon as married people step foot back in their houses at the end of the day, the man should default to a more powerful position.

The big question here is “why?” Why do both men and women want women to be more submissive at home, but be on equal footing with men at work? As Pepin puts it, this is the “question of the hour,” and will require more research to narrow down. However, the study provides some insight.

There’s a clear reason why women and men would be on the same page about women’s roles in the workplace, Pepin says. In one word: money! More money for women in a couple means more money for the whole family, so it makes sense that men who have wives and families would be supportive of a higher family income. What’s harder to make sense of is why both men and women in the study want women to go back in time when it comes to home life.

Pepin explains to us that for men and women to be on equal footing at home, it’s men’s behavior that would have to change. As the report notes, this would mean men would have to start doing more household work that is traditionally reserved for women, such as cooking, cleaning, and laundry. As Pepin put it to us, “What’s the incentive for doing that?” Men could be hesitant to do their fair share around the home, but it does leave the question as to why young women don’t see an incentive.

What can be at least partially explained is why the young people who prefer a more equal setup at home feel the way that they do. According to a 2016 study of 22 European and English-speaking countries, parents in the United States are overall less happy than non-parents, and are the least happy of all the parents studied.

The “happiness gap,” as the study’s author, Dr. Jennifer Glass of the University of Texas at Austin put it, can be explained by the dire lack of social support for families in the United States compared to the other 21 countries examined. Because the non-US countries offer widely available subsidies for childcare and even housework, there’s less of a need for parents themselves to deal with the domestic tasks that weigh so heavily on parents (and mothers especially) in the United States.

Observing the unhappiness of their own parents, it’s easy to suppose that young millennials don’t want to have the same family dynamics that their parents have, and assume that recreating old traditional gender roles at home could sort some of that out. The findings of Glass’s study do in fact demonstrate that more support at home makes for happier parents.

Pepin tells us the findings of Trending Towards Traditionalism? were not what she and Dr. Cotter expected. There’s a prevalent belief that each generation is more progressive than the last, but young millennials have demonstrated that this theory doesn’t necessarily hold. Because of this, Pepin cautions that society can’t bank on new generations working toward gender equality.

All of this sounds pretty grim, but Pepin says we should remember that while “change toward gender equality feels really slow, it really is happening fast in a historical context.” If we take a look back at where we really were in the ’50s, we’ve come along way, and there’s nothing in the study that says the movement is stopping now.

What are your thoughts on women’s equality in the home? Tell us about it on Twitter @BritandCo.

(h/t New York Times; Photos via Pixabay + Pexels + Wikimedia Commons)

A lot of people pride themselves on being optimists, and TBH, if you canstay positivewith everything that’s going on in the world today, major props to you. For most people who consider themselves the glass-half-full type, it’s a lifestyle. They try to look at everything that comes their way, from relationship troubles to work mistakes, with a positive spin. But a recent study investigated whether optimists still stay more positive than pessimists when things get really tough, and what they found was pretty surprising.


Scientists analyzed nine previous studies to see how both optimists and pessimists brace themselves for receiving important and potentially negative news, like medical test results. They found that even though people who identify as optimists tend to be more positive in general, they too start assuming the worst as the moment of truth about something important nears. It’s easy to understand this instinct, since some people tend to believe that preparing yourself for the worst will ultimately make it less shocking if it happens. On the other hand, some people would rather stay positive whenever possible, since it’s easier to fight off stress and anxiety when you have a sunny outlook. Here, we’ve gathered some of our favorite expert tips for staying optimistic when you’re dealing with some super hard stuff.

How To Stay Positive

1.Learn to reframe negativity. “The trick to positivity is not avoiding pessimism,” says Elaine Taylor-Klaus, a certified professional coach. “It’s really about how quickly you can redirect your focus from negative to positive. Critical thinkers are going to see problems to be solved, but the ability to ‘reframe’ the conversation is the really important skill for people to practice.” She recommends getting into the habit of acknowledging negative thoughts and then asking, “What else is possible here?” This can guide you back into a positive mindset more quickly.

“Bottom line: Negativity happens,” she says. “Positivity is a choice, and the quicker you learn to reframe, the more time you’ll spend in a positive space. Then, over time, the more likely you are to turn directly to a positive interpretation of events.”

2. Ask yourself if this will matter a month or year from now. Sometimes things seem crucial AF in the moment, but might be inconsequential even just a few days after that. Just think about high school drama. “When we can leave the past behind and even know in the present moment that this feeling won’t last, it can help to remind us that time heals and life goes on,” explainsSharon Stokes, life-fulfillment coach.

3.Give back. Volunteering is an amazing way to change your entire perspective, saysLyssa Menard, a clinical health psychologist, founder of Strategies for Changeand assistant professor at Northwestern University’s medical school. “There are many organizations that don’t require an ongoing commitment, so sign up for an event that’s meaningful. Research shows that giving to others is one of the quickest routes toward happiness. While happiness and positivity are different, they’re correlated,” Lyssa says.

4. Role play to be more objective. Playing a little mind trick on yourself can work wonders, says Lori Scherwin of Strategize That, a career coaching service. “We’re often better at helping others than ourselves,” she notes. “Make the situation more objective and less personal to you. For example, consider if it were anyone else in the situation (like your best friend, partner or colleague). How would you see the same ‘problem?’ What advice might you give them to get out of it?” she asks. This will help you shift from being super hard on yourself to more objective, and most likely, more positive.

5. Make changes to things that are within your control. Spending time worrying about something that you can’t change isn’t really worth the effort. Instead, “Focus on areas where you have agency,” suggests Holly Burton, a career coach for women in male-dominated industries. “You may be stuck in a role you don’t love at work, but you could probably work a few extra hours a week and take on a project that interests you. You could also schedule some proactive meetings with your boss to make an action plan to develop the skills you need to make a lateral move,” she says. In most situations, whether they’re career-related or not, it’s possible to take actions to make things better for yourself.

6. Practice radical acceptance. Some professional coaches suggest trying out the idea of radical acceptance, which is basically accepting the things you cannot change, even if they’re not right or you don’t agree with them.

7.Try this gratitude challenge. First, journal about one event each day for seven days that made you feel happy and/or thankful and include the specifics of why it made you feel that way, going deep into the details. Second, send one random thank you email or text to someone each day, either personally or professionally. This message should include what they did and why it’s worthy of the shout out. Detailed gratitude journals are proven to improve your life satisfaction, so try to stick to a gratitude practice, even in the good times!

What do you do when you’re trying to stay optimistic? Have you tried any of these techniques? Tell us about it @BritandCo!

This article has been updated.

New York City is a home and a hub for celebrities across all industries, and the glitzy appeal of Gossip Girl’s NYC is made all the more glamorous by its numerous celebrity cameos. Given that Blair and Serena run in the upper echelon of the city’s It girls, it actually makes total sense for them to be rubbing shoulders with Alexa Chung and Lady Gaga. You never know who you’re going to run into on the Upper East Side — and in Gossip Girl’s case, you may not even remember half the celebs you meet.

Over the course of six wonderfully melodramatic seasons, Gossip Girl racked up quite a stacked cast list on IMDB. From stars with recurring roles to those who pop in to play themselves for one scene, here are 17 celebrities who appeared on Gossip Girl that you probably forgot about.

Scroll down to see all the celebrity Gossip Girlcameos we're totally obsessed with!

1. William Baldwin

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Serena van der Woodsen’s got some serious daddy issues. One of Gossip Girl’s longest subplots is Serena’s search for her father, who essentially walked out on her when she was a kid. He finally appears for the first time in Season 3 Episode 19 (“Dr. Estrangeloved), where he’s played by a member of one of NYC’s royal families, William Baldwin. (In case you’re wondering, he’s Hailey Bieber’s uncle.)

2. Lady Gaga

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You probably blocked out the time Blair and Dan put on a jukebox version of Snow White at NYU given that the whole ordeal was painfully cringe. That means you probably also blocked out the fact that real-life NYU alum Lady Gaga gives a dead-eyed performance of “Bad Romance” at the end of the episode (Season 3 Episode 10, “The Last Days of Discostick”).

3. Hilary Duff

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Also included in the Season 3 NYU timeline is Hilary Duff as Olivia Burke. Olivia’s a famous actress who balances attending NYU, starring in the vampire romance franchise Endless Knights, and dating Dan. She’s basically the Gossip Girl universe’s hybrid of Kristen Stewart and Emma Watson.

4. Sebastian Stan

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Okay, there’s absolutely no way you forgot this one. Before Sebastian Stan was the MCU’s BB, he was Gossip Girl’s lesser-known CB — Carter Baizen. Stan played St. Jude’s sleaziest graduate and one of Serena’s most questionable exes from Seasons 1 through 3.

5. Karlie Kloss

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Karlie Kloss will always attend a NYFW party — even if that party only exists within Gossip Girl’s Season 4 premiere (“Belles du Jour”).

6. Armie Hammer

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Serena’s dating history includes one man whose bite may be worse than his bark. In Season 2, she starts dating a con man named Gabriel Edwards, played by Armie Hammer.

7. Cyndi Lauper

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Girls just wanna have Cyndi Lauper do a surprise performance at their eighteenth birthday party — at least, Blair Waldorf does. Lauper makes a cameo in Season 2 Episode 10 (“Bonfire of the Vanity”).

8. Tyra Banks

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Tyra Banks plays Ursula, a famous actress who Serena keeps from crashing out at a movie premiere, in Season 3 Episode 4 (“Dan de Fleurette”).

9. Clémence Poésy

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When Chuck goes to France in Season 4 and attempts to restart his life as Henry Prince, he takes Fleur Delacour — err, I mean, Clémence Poésy — along for the ride.

10. Mädchen Amick

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Sorry, Archiekins — Alice Cooper’s got her eye on a different Archibald. Riverdale star Mädchen Amick appears in Season 2 as Nate’s first foray into MILF territory.

11. Elizabeth Hurley

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Mädchen Amick walked so Elizabeth Hurley could run … Nate’s life into the ground. Hurley plays shady media mogul Diana Payne throughout Season 5.

12. Aaron Tveit

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This guest star lives rent-free in Broadway fans’ minds. Aaron Tveit, the patron saint of tenors, appears in Seasons 2 through 5 as Nate’s cousin, politician Tripp van der Bilt.

13. Alexa Chung

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In Season 6 Episode 3 (“Dirty Rotten Scandals”), Alexa Chung, the minimalist darling of the 2010s fashion blogging scene, refuses to walk the runway at Blair Waldorf’s debut fashion show.

14. Rachel Bilson & Kristen Bell

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Rachel Bilson and Kristen Bell show up in the series finale as two actresses auditioning for a role in Inside Out, the movie adaptation of Dan’s bestselling book, Inside. Bell’s voice should ring a bell — she’s the voice ofGossip Girl.

15. Tim Gunn

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Project Runway’s iconic mentor, Tim Gunn gives Jenny a little mentorship in Season 4 Episode 6 (“Easy J”).

16. Rachel Zoe

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Rachel Zoe: celebrity stylist, fashion designer, and extremely good sport. In her GG cameo in Season 4 Episode 7 (“War at the Roses”), Zoe takes a tumble and spills chocolate sauce all over her head before delivering her iconic catchphrase, “I die.” We die, too.

17. Florence Welch

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Welch’s performance of “Cosmic Love” in Season 4 Episode 14 (“Panic Roommate”) was reportedly due to her real-life friendship with Blake Lively. The actress suggested to the producers that they should use Florence’s music in the show. The producers went one step further, and we’re all the better for it.

Wonder what other celebs have appeared in your favorite TV shows? Check out these 24 Sex and the City cameos and 11 Gilmore Girls cameos you may have missed!

It's fun to learn more about ourselves and to feel understood — that's why we take personality tests so incessantly. And since we live in an age of increased self-awareness, we can apply those tests to so many things, like our Hogwarts house and makeup preferences. Clearly, knowing thyself has taken on a whole new meaning lately, and we love the things that these tests can tell us — but did you ever wonder how your personality might affect your dreams? In a new study, Best Mattress Brand set out to discover whether specific types of people had particular types of dreams. Read on for their fascinating results.

The test explored each component of the Myers-Briggs types, which can be broken down into eight characteristics:

Extraversion or Introversion: This is the way you focus your energy. Extroverts focus on the outside world, and Introverts focus on their inner world.

Sensing or Intuition: This is the way you process information. Sensing individuals focus on the facts, and Intuitive individuals interpret the facts.

Thinking or Feeling: This is the way you make decisions. Thinkers process decisions logically, and Feelers make decisions with context and emotion in mind.

Judging or Perceiving: This is the lens through which you interpret the world. Judgers prefer decisive action, while Perceivers like to keep their options open.

Together, your individual combination of these eight traits creates your personality type. Given these traits as variables, the study surveyed 1,000 people on their Myers Briggs traits and their sleep habits.

As you'd imagine, there were a lot of discrepancies between Introverts and Extroverts. Interestingly enough, Extroverts are 17.7 percent more satisfied with their levels of energy during waking hours than their introverted counterparts. Perhaps it's because of their dream habits: Extroverts also have 8.3 percent fewer nightmares than Introverts. Extroverts also dream about traveling 13.9 percent more often than Introverts do.

What about the content of these dreams? If you're Intuitive, you're 16.8 percent more likely to dream about being killed than Sensers are. ­Apparently, Intuitive individuals' dreams are more violent across the board: They also dream about getting attacked and “punching something with no effect" more often.

There's also a substantial difference between Thinkers and Feelers when it comes to dreams. The more emotional Feelers dream about getting pregnant more often than Thinkers do, and they dream about their friends more often too. Perhaps Thinkers are just thinking too hard; they talk in their sleep almost 10 percent more than Feelers do.

The Judgers and Perceivers have their differences as well; in fact, Perceivers have night terrors 10.2 percent more often than Judgers, probably due to the fact that they experience reality so deeply.

Does your personality type match up with these findings? Let us know @BritandCo.

(Photo via Brit + Co)

This post has been updated.

This weekend, news dropped that Blake Lively filed a bombshell lawsuit against It Ends With Usco-star Justin Baldoni, and everyone is rushing to her support — including her Sisterhood of the Traveling Pantsco-stars!

One day we need to have a conversation about how easy it is to assign the 'mean girl' role to women like Anne Hathaway, Hailey Bieber, Meghan Markle, and now, Blake Lively. Since that's a separate article, let's focus on the situation at hand. According to Deadline, Lively's suing Baldoni for "sexually harassing her and subsequently enacting 'a coordinated effort to destroy her reputation.'" After the news dropped, The New York Times subsequently published article that details the winding allegations against Baldoni, producer Jamie Heath, and more players in the supposed targeted attack against her.

While a lot of public opinion turned against Lively during the It Ends With Us rollout, it's clear those closest to her showed unyielding support. Now, fellow celebrities are showing up in droves to stand with Lively amid the allegations. One bold show of support that we're totally here for? Alexis Bledel, America Ferrera, and Amber Tamblyn taking their "sisterhood" to new heights. Here's what they — and everyone else — has said in support of Blake Lively so far.

Scroll down to see everyone who's supported Blake Lively amid the Justin Baldoni lawsuit so far!

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Blake Lively's The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants Co-Stars

Alexis Bledel, Amber Tamblyn, and America Ferrera made it clear that they're firmly in support of their friend Blake Lively. They released a message on Instagram that left no room for assumption about their beliefs following Blake's lawsuit against Baldoni.
The statement reads:
As Blake's friends and sisters for over twenty years, we stand with her in solidarity as she fights back against the reported campaign waged to destroy her reputation. Throughout the filming of It Ends With Us, we saw her summon the courage to ask for a safe workplace for herself and colleagues on set, and we are appalled to read the evidence of a premeditated and vindictive effort that ensued to discredit her voice.

Most upsetting is the unabashed exploitation of domestic violence survivors' stories to silence a woman who asked for safety. The hypocrisy is astounding.

We are struck by the reality that even if a woman is as strong, celebrated, and resourced as our friend Blake, she can still face forceful retaliation for daring to ask for a safe work environment. We are inspired by our sister's courage to stand up for herself and others.

For anyone seeking more information or engaging in this important conversation online, please read the full legal complaint in the investigative reporting by Megan Twohey, Mike McIntire, and Julie Tate for the New York Times.

We love the lasting, strong friendship between these four!

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Colleen Hoover, Author of It Ends With Us

According to Entertainment Weekly, Colleen Hoover also spoke up in light of the damage Baldoni inflicted. She tagged Blake via Instagram Stories and wrote, "You have been nothing but honest, kind, supportive and patient since the day we met. Thank you for being exactly the human that you are. Never change. Never wilt." A picture of the author and star hugging followed Hoover's words, adding to the depth of the moment.

Paul Feig, Director of A Simple Favor

Director Paul Feig also shared his thoughts about what it's like to work with Blake on X. He said, "I’ve now made two movies with Blake and all I can say is she’s one of the most professional, creative, collaborative, talented and kind people I’ve ever worked with. She truly did not deserve any of this smear campaign against her. I think it’s awful she was put through this."

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Robyn Lively, Blake Lively's Sister

The sisterly energy is real and we're so glad Blake is surrounded by it. Robyn, Blake's big sister, shared her full thoughts in a lengthy Instagram caption just 10 hours!

While encouraging people to do research for themselves by reading The New York Times article that details the devious plot to publicly destroy Blake, she had other things to say. "We live in an age where we have access to people’s personal lives like never before — especially actors. It makes us feel like we know them. We see them on social media, watch clips of them, and make snap decisions about their character," she wrote. This reminds me of the parasocial relationships author Amanda Montell detailed in The Age of Magical Overthinking — definitely something for us all to keep in mind.

She also called out how easy it is for the media to warp the public's perception of the truth. "The 'truth' in the tabloids is hardly ever what you think," she added before eventually expressing how "proud" she is that her sister "didn't allow herself to be silenced in the face of adversity and lies."

Bart Johnson, Blake Lively's Brother-in-law

According to Page Six, Blake's brother-in-law Bart Johnson didn't hesitate to share his thoughts about the behavior of Baldoni and his team. He reportedly wrote, "Her complaints were filed during the filming. On record. Long before the public conflict. The cast unfollowed him [Baldoni] for a reason." in the comment section of the NYT Instagram post about the lengthy deep dive into what happened.

He continued by writing, "His PR team was stellar. Gross and disgusting but highly effective. Read the article, their text message exchanges and his PR campaign strategy to bury her by any means necessary. No one is with out [sic] faults. But the public got played."

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The most important detail about any romantic movie is chemistry between its leads. Even the worst movie can be rescued by two characters you believe actually love each other. But that's not a problem for A24's Babygirl (in theaters December 25) because Nicole Kidman and Harris Dickinson have chemistry in spades. The new A24 movie follows CEO Romy (Kidman), who begins a torrid affair with a young intern named Samuel (Dickinson). And AMC queen Nicole says she knew Harris was different the moment he walked in the room.

Here's what Nicole Kidman and Harris Dickinson had to say about their chemistry in our exclusive Babygirl featurette.

Nicole Kidman and Harris Dickinson connected the moment they met.

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"As soon as he walked in, I was like, 'Oh good, here's somebody who's gonna play with me," Nicole Kidman says in our exclusive Babygirl featurette. "We spent a lot of time in bed. Hours would go by, and it was like you would step out of there and you would say, 'What just happened?'"

"From the moment [Samuel] sees her, he's attracted to her. He realizes there's someone at the height of their power," Harris says. "There was an element of mystique that needed to be there for the exploration of the relationship."

Harris continues that "perhaps there's something unfulfilled going on," perhaps referencing Romy's fizzled-out marriage with Jacob, while Nicole adds that "she's searching for something else" as the movie examines "desires, wants, [and] needs."

"Drink it in and be transported," she says.

​And their chemistry in 'Babygirl' was so intense, Nicole Kidman had to take breaks from filming.

In addition to spending "hours" in bed (which, honestly sounds like a pretty good work day to me), Nicole told The Sun in October that filming those scenes with Harris Dickinson became so intense, she would need breaks. “There were times when we were shooting where I was like, ‘I don’t want to orgasm any more,'” she said. “Don’t come near me. I hate doing this. I don’t care if I am never touched again in my life!”

But having a woman at the helm of the film (writer-director-producer Halina Reijn) both made Nicole feel more comfortable, and empowered her to tell this story. "Doing this subject matter in the hands of the woman that wrote the script, that's directing it and is a really great actress herself — we became one in a weird way, which I'd never had with a director before," she says in a statement. "When you're working with a woman on this subject matter, you can share everything with each other.”

"I really decided in the beginning, I want to make a sexual film, just as sexual as all these films that I've always admired so much," Halina says, "but now I'm going to do it completely through female eyes. What does that mean and what does that look like?” See Babygirl in theaters December 25 to find out.

Here are the 10 New December Movies You Need To Add To Your Calendar ASAP.