A Woman's Place: Women in Food and Beverage


A Woman's Place: Women in Food and Beverage

“A Woman’s Place” is a series spotlighting the women making bold moves in male-dominated industries.

No one ever said working in food and drink is easy. Restaurant and bar jobs often involve grueling hours in a high-intensity (and often overheated) environment, always being on your feet, barely making above minimum wage, and rarely, if ever, getting so much as a break. In many instances, service industry jobs come without perks like health insurance, retirement plans, or even basic sick days. What’s more, the nature of service work means doing it all with a smile on your face, particularly in front-of-house roles where your take-home pay depends on it.

If that wasn’t hard enough, being a woman and/or marginalized person adds another level of sexism, racism, and bigotry within this mostly white male-dominated field.

Things are changing, however. The #MeToo movement has helped to shed light on the widely known back-of-the-house behavior from high-profile chefs and restaurateurs like Mario Batali, Ken Friedman, John Besh, and Mike Isabella, all the way up the chain to a massive walk-out at McDonald’s franchises across the country. And while it’s an embarrassingly late acknowledgement that women shouldn’t have to “lighten up” about predatory behavior on the job, there’s no denying that the impact is huge and opening the door for women to make career advances they might not have dreamed of even a decade ago.

The number of women-owned restaurants increased 40 percent from 2007 to 2012, according to a 2016 report from the National Restaurant Association, and issues impacting women have become a hot topic at industry conferences across the country, setting a precedent for a progressive future.

“20 years ago, you could be cursed at, you could be ‘lovingly touched’ by a superior — what I thought was completely normal behavior, I have seen it all,” says Gayle Pirie, chef-owner of San Francisco’s Foreign Cinema. “So at this point, we are very grateful where there is a movement to reach equilibrium, though it’s taking time and there’s still much to be done.”

























ASCENDING THE LINE

Imagine this scenario: You’ve fallen in love with cooking and decided to turn it into a full-time career. You go to culinary school with grand ambitions of becoming a chef, ascending the line, and eventually becoming the next Alice Waters. Except, as soon as you enter the kitchen, a bunch of dudes shove you to the pastry station. Wait, what?

Pastry is the one area in the restaurant that women dominate, whether they want to or not. Women are frequently pigeonholed in this so-called “pink dungeon” — often seen as a more “feminine” line of work — and have a harder time moving up, simply because they’re not placed in positions supporting their intended career track. Teresa Montaño, chef-owner of Otoño in Los Angeles, learned this the hard way during her first couple of years working at her second restaurant, which, despite being owned by two women, had a roughly 95 percent male staff.

“I was clearly one of the best cooks and working every station, but they kept scheduling me as a pastry plater at the back of the line,” she tells us. “Friday and Saturday night, I was ready to cook on the line, but they kept putting me in the back. I would finish all of my work and prep, then I’d go on the line, and the chefs would say, ‘What are you doing?’ So, I was a nuisance until they taught me. I knew I wanted to be on the line and had to do what I had to do to get known.”

Along the way, she had to deal with harassment, slurs, and sexism. But men and women alike in the industry ascribe to the “suck it up” mentality.


“A lot of people were scared to speak up against the chefs in place. I personally never brought it up to them and in hindsight, I don’t know why. It comes with the territory. You deal with it, and if you complain, you’re being weak or something. As a young cook, I was the bottom of the barrel, so I kept my mouth shut,” she says.


Deborah VanTrece, owner of Twisted Soul Cookhouse & Pours in Atlanta, was warned before she even entered the kitchen. “My first slap in the face was culinary school itself. There were very few women, more so very few women of color,” she tells us. “In culinary school, they let you know what's going to happen. So, it wasn’t a well-kept secret; it was the norm.”


A former flight attendant who transitioned mid-career into the restaurant industry, VanTrece was used to working alongside a staff of mostly women. Idealistic and eager to learn everything she could about cooking, she not only had to fight against being relegated to the pastry station but also butted heads with male egos.

“As I’m going up through the ranks, some [male chauvinism] you can’t help but notice. Period,” she says. “The first position I got was an executive sous chef for a major catering company in Atlanta. I was ecstatic. I thought, ‘Look at me, I got a job as a sous chef!’

"About two months in, the male executive chef cornered me and told me that if he knew how good I was, he would have never hired me. For a minute, it kind of crushed me; I thought the purpose was to be good. But that was my first real dose of reality.”


Because she had the means to leave, VanTrece managed to make a quick exit. But when she tried interviewing for other positions, she encountered a whole new set of issues.

“There were quite a few times that I knew the interest was more in me than in what my skill was,” she says. “It was real obvious in interviews: ‘[Are you] married? Let me walk you to your car.’” Eventually, she was able to find a place working among other women before opening her own restaurant, but even entrepreneurship can present its own kind of gender discrimination.

WHO'S THE BOSS?

Why work for a crappy boss when you can be your own boss? Entrepreneurship allows women to set their own rules, but even that has its own gender-bias problems. For one, women can face barriers to accessing funding — which isn’t shocking, considering that even in more lucrative industries like the start-up world, female founders received a paltry two percent of venture capital funding in 2017.

VanTrece had already heard “No” enough times that she didn’t even bother going to the bank and opened her first two concepts, Edible Art Cafe and Catering and The Catering Company by VanTrece, with her own money. Despite her entrepreneurial expertise, she still had trouble finding investors when she wanted to enter the market for a third business.

“I think it’s easier for male chefs to find investors, and being African American, it’s another notch,” she says. “I’m watching people all around me, like they’re giving away candy at the candy store. The banks say no, and that’s the reality of that. It makes it harder to find people willing to invest. It’s a very white male-dominated industry.”

Even with capital, VanTrece encountered real estate issues within the highly segregated city of Atlanta, waiting five months before the landlord would agree to let her have her space for Twisted Soul.

”I can’t imagine if I had gone into an area that was all African American, if it would have taken that long. It just wouldn’t have. Unfortunately, those who do own Black-owned restaurants are systematically segregated and we don’t get to venture out much,” she says.

“Prior to the restaurant I’m in now, I fell on what I thought was a great opportunity to open in a very much white male-dominated community of chefs, and I was the lone ranger,” she continues. “And it brought back feelings of isolation, even now, because I thought better of the city that I lived in. But the way that I was treated, the way I was excluded, was real obvious to me that I was not a part of that gang. I chose another area that I thought would promote more diversity. I wanted all people, that’s how I grew up. I wanted all people to enjoy my food.”

Once everything is up and running, there’s also the issue of management. Every female chef we interviewed says they’ve encountered some form of male subordinates not taking as well to direction.

“As I became a stronger line cook and I was walking into the supervision/management world, line cooks who were men were a lot more difficult to corral,” says Pirie of her time ascending during the early ‘90s. “A lot more attitude, problems with certain people, more so than females. You just have to be strong. You want to respect the employee and work with them, and be judicious and fair, and you just get shunned if you’re a girl. I wasn’t an effective manager, but I did have to tippy toe around male cooks. There was ego.”

When Montaño eventually worked her way up to sous chef, becoming “one of the guys” meant dealing with being treated like one. “Some of them wanted to treat me like one of the guys, because I also like women. So, they thought I’d treat women and talk about women in the same way,” she says. “Some of them knew I was in a relationship, and my girlfriend at the time would come to the restaurant and they would comment on that. It was more like they wanted to treat me like one of the guys, and of course I’m not going to say disrespectful things about my girlfriend or colleagues. Just because I like women, doesn’t mean I want to treat them like that.”

Codified roles remain an ongoing problem on both sides of the house, particularly in the front of the house, where customers routinely exploit the role of female service workers based on appearance and temperament. (The tipping system, in particular, lends to a reward/punishment system often tainted by misogynistic entitlement.) Buckle under the pressure or don’t handle it with grace? You’ll be judged more harshly for that, too.

“Honestly, I left the front-of-the-house environment because it was so frustrating to me,” says Shelby Allison, who took a sabbatical from a decade-long career in the restaurant industry to work in hospitality writing and PR before moving into a leadership position as the co-owner of Chicago’s Lost Lake and co-founder of industry conference Chicago Style.

“All of the roles felt very stratified," Allison tells us. "If you were white, if you were an immigrant, if you were old, young — the role was already planned out for you and I didn’t see a whole lot of roles that I was interested in or people like myself.

“I think in any field, you’ll find that women need to be more measured in their responses to situations. It’s very easy for people to view our reactions as being overly emotional, so learning to code switch into a meeting full of men so you’re not being ‘the over emotional one,’ that goes for any industry.”

'HAVING IT ALL' IN THE RESTAURANT INDUSTRY

It’s the epic struggle plaguing women since we entered the workforce on our own terms: Where is the balance between holding down a career and raising a family? It’s a tough question for any industry, but particularly in food service, where maternity leave and health insurance are non-existent and unpredictable working hours often run much later than childcare services.

After she divorced, VanTrece became the primary caregiver of her daughter. To keep the benefits of being able to provide her with insurance, she had to let her two restaurants go and segue solely into catering. “With catering, I had more control with the time spent preparing the food; she could be with me. I hired staff that could deliver and even cooked out of my home. But it made it a lot easier for me, so it’s something that I try to tell other females coming up,” she says. “The restaurant thing, it takes over your life, and I had to let it go.”

Pirie and her husband, John Clark, managed to raise two children while running Foreign Cinema, but she has watched many of her own female cooks leave to tend to their families.

“In the past, it has driven women to leave the industry and it has driven line cooks into corporate venues where the time has left,” she says. “Part of the logic of it is, there’s only so many years to be a line cook, and when you get older, administrative or executive. You don’t have line cooks that are 60 years old — I mean, you do, but there’s a beginning, middle, and end with a culinary career. You start doing things because you’re physically able to, and as it winds down, you move onto food styling or it’s all kind of fleeting. And then there’s an arc to people’s careers. That’s all understood.”

California is a rarity in the service industry, because grassroots movements have developed to provide benefits to help with paid leave and childcare. Occasionally, some restaurants will individually create their own benefit plans and work with employees to assist individuals. But overall, the industry still has a long way to go to address the type of limitations and commitment required to raise a family.

THE SILVER LINING

Despite the infinite list of hardships caused by the gender disparity in the restaurant industry, everyone agrees that airing its dirty laundry around gender has made a huge improvement in pushing forward change.

Otoño is only three months old, but Montaño has already started hiring a staff with an even male-to-female ratio in the back-of-the-house and female-heavy front-of-the-house.

“I just think it’s the responsibility of the chef or the owner to create a safe environment for their workers and that’s where it starts,” she says. “There’s a lot of finger-pointing, but I’m really delighted to see a generation of chefs and owners taking that role very seriously and putting it at the forefront. The culture of their restaurant dictates the outcome and what people feel when they walk through the door. That’s something I’m definitely passionate about.”

Social media has also had a major impact, creating an environment for more women in the industry to connect and help each other.

“For years, I felt like it’s just me, figure it out,” says VanTrece. “It’s not to say I’ve never heard of another female chef of color or just another female chef, in general, but you didn’t hear about them as often. Now, I can hit a search on the internet and a million come up. Every day, there are five or six I’m getting a request from. I see us helping each other. I now have a group of female chefs here in Atlanta that I didn’t even know really exist, and we have a camaraderie and we look for other chefs.”

Conversations surrounding #MeToo and intersectional feminism inspired Allison to co-found Chicago Style, which focuses on thoughtful conversations within the cocktail community in hopes of creating a more inclusive industry that factors in women, people of color, queer people, and people with varied immigration status.

“With the MeToo movement, things are changing across the board,” she says. “What I can speak to for the hospitality industry, women and other marginalized people are emboldened by the consequences that poor managers are facing, so this culture as a whole is starting to change. I’m not going to take credit for that — I only have a small corner bar — but I hope that by example I can help give people the courage to not stand for that kind of treatment at work, and I hope through Chicago Style we’re able to help people in other cities not to stand through. As a whole, it feels like there's a sea change.”

(Design by San Trieu/ Brit + Co)

Sexis often considered taboo...even though it's a natural human need and desire. But — thanks in part to the entertainment industry — it's slowly becoming normalized in the many different shapes and sizes it comes. From quickies in random places to passionate lovemaking, the actors in shows like Bridgerton and Sex and the City show us the sides of sex we're remiss to talk about. And while Phoebe Dynevor is no stranger to a sex scene (literally HOW did she get through filming with Regé Jean?!), she took this "taboo" subject matter to another level in the opening scenes for her new movie Fair Play.

Image via Sergej Radovic / Courtesy of Netflix

Emily (Phoebe Dynevor) is seen getting busy with her fiancé Luke (Alden Ehrenreich) at a wedding. While that's not necessarily gag-worthy, there's one determining factor that could be — she's on her period. Not only that, but there's oral sex involved that Luke happily engages in. It's a highly erotic and graphic scene that has the potential to leave viewers reeling, but Emily and Luke aren't grossed out by what they're doing. They're too caught up in bliss to think there's something wrong about being pleasured during one's period.

I'll be honest — younger me would have immediately ran for the heels at this description because...ew. I'm not personally comfortable with the oral aspect of the scene, but I'm familiar with putting down a towel during period sex. It's all about preference, and no matter where you stand on the period sex issue, it's nice to have a partner that doesn't treat you like a walking science experiment during your period.

What did Phoebe Dynevor say about filming the sex scene in "Fair Play"?

She's actually happy the scene was filmed, and thinks director Chloe Domont did an excellent job showing that sex doesn't have to be skipped the week of someone's period. She told Ellethat male directors would've questioned the necessity of it. "We as women know these things happen all the time, but why are we not seeing it on our screens," she asked.

When does the period sex scene appear in "Fair Play"?

Image via Sergej Radovic / Courtesy of Netflix

Trigger warning — this sex scene appears at the very beginning of Fair Play. Talk about starting off with a bang!

What is the plot of "Fair Play?"

Fair Play centers around the work culture of a hedge fund company that begins to take a toll on a couple. In a deeper plot analysis, Ellereports that Dynevor's character Emily has a secret engagement to her coworker, but "she gets a surprise promotion, which causes issues in their relationship outside of work." It takes a deep dive into the gender norms that can begin to stifle a relationship if both people have different views of how things are supposed to fall in place in and outside of the home.

What else has Dynevor said about "Fair Play"?

Image via Sergej Radovic / Courtesy of Netflix

She pointed out that it's an excellent marker for how far society has to go in terms of respecting women. She also told Elle, "We have this idea that world is so progressive...but there's still so much progress to be made and so many things that haven't been done or still taboo." To drive this point further home, Dynevor said, "The thing that was really interesting to me is how modern feminism is clashing with traditional masculinity...Emily is really trying to make herself small to make him [Luke] feel masculine."

This is true because we're seeing the effects of attacks on reproductive and maternal health. Not only that, but there's still an expectation for how women are supposed to carry themselves whether they're mothers or not. As far as we've come, the work to fully recognize that women aren't monolithic and deserve to have our voices, time, and efforts respected is ongoing. That we shouldn't have to shrink so that men don't feel threatened or emasculated. That us asking to be appreciated and respected has nothing to do with attacking men's self esteem.

Until we get to that point, films like Fair Play will continue to exist to push the conversation forward.

When can you watch "Fair Play"?

Fair Play will premiere in theaters September 29, 2023 and will be available to stream on Netflix beginning October 13, 2023.

Watch The Trailer For "Fair Play"

www.youtube.com

FAIR PLAY | Official Trailer | Netflix

What do you think about Phoebe Dynevor's "taboo" sex scene in Fair Play?Let us know in the comments and follow the conversation on Facebook!

Lead image via Kate Green/Getty Images.

It's The Holiday season — which means it's time to fangirl over Jude Law again. (Although some would argue it's always time to fangirl over Jude Law). His character Graham is a total heartthrob, as well as Iris' (Kate Winslet) big brother, but he's also a single dad to two daughters, which is where he's most swoon worthy, IMO. And the internet agrees that showing Amanda (Cameron Diaz) his dinner party alter ego Mr. Napkin Head is one of the best moments of the film. So it's safe to say that when he recreated the scene with director Nancy Meyers, the internet lost its mind.

Check out the video of Jude Law & director Nancy Meyers recreating Mr. Napkin Head from The Holiday — and teasing a potential The Holiday 2.

Jude Law & Nancy Meyers recreate Mr. Napkin Head.

Jude Law and Nancy Meyers reunited on Thursday December 12 to celebrate Jude getting a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. "Congrats Jude! ⭐️" Nancy said on Instagram. "I was thrilled to be at a lunch for Jude today and I had one question for him…."

While filming Jude from the other side of the table, an off-camera Nancy says, "It’s so great to see you. I don’t think I’ve seen you since we wrapped up The Holiday. Speaking of which. I’ve seen you interviewed a lot, and they keep asking you if there’s going to be a sequel, what do you think?”

In lieu of a verbal answer, Jude grabs a napkin and glasses and transforms into Mr. Napkin Head. That's not a no, Jude!!! Is this a hint that we'll see Graham again? "For the love of god, please give us a sequel 😩😩😩😩 we are dying without a new Nancy Meyers movie!!!" one user commented, while another says, "We desperately need you back in the director’s chair making another movie."

Jude Law has also revealed he's "love" to do a 'The Holiday 2'!

Jude has said in the past that the possibility for a potential sequel rests with Nancy, so the fact she's playing into the hype definitely gives me hope. “I’d love to see where they’re at,” Jude says on Today. “I’m a yes. You need to check in with everyone else...I'll ask Kate."

“I think Graham still has cardigans and glasses, and reads,” he adds in an interview with E! News. “He’s probably worried sick 'bout the girls, right? The daughters will be 28, 29.”

And in addition to teasing The Holiday 2, Jude Law also recently went viral for revealing The Holiday movie cottage doesn't actually exist — and breaking thousands of hearts in the process!

"So [Nancy Meyers], she's a bit of a perfectionist," he told BBC Radio. "She toured that whole area and didn't quite find the chocolate box cottage she's looking for...She just [rented] a field, and drew it and had someone build it."

But while the outside of the cottage looks like the perfect London Christmas card, the inside was, well...empty. "So here's the funny thing, if you watch it...We were shooting in the winter here," he continues. "And every time I'd go in that door, we'd cut, and we shot the interiors in L.A. about three months later...Just burst the bubble. Sorry!"

How do you feel about a potential The Holiday 2 in the era of sequels? Want more behind the scenes facts on the movie? Read up on Kate Winslet Still Goes By This Nickname Jack Black Gave Her During The Holiday!

I think we can all agree that the Netflix sensation To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before has firmly cemented itself as a classic teen movie (and one of the best rom-coms) that will continue to get better the more we watch it. Needless to say, Peter Kavinsky (Noah Centineo) captured our hearts with his swagger, his symphony of “whoa”s, and that back pocket spin. But truth be told, 16-year-old Lara Jean (Lana Condor) and the Covey sisters became our #WCWs with their solidarity, healthy family dynamic, and emphases on self-love and self-confidence. That goes hand-in-hand with how proud they are about their Korean heritage and how it’s become such an integral part of their identities. That sense of confidence and deep pride emanates from their characters throughout the film and is manifested in everything they do.

Despite their high school and middle school settings and accompanying cliques, rumors, and Instagram posts, the Covey sisters are lacking in teenage angst or sisterly rivalry, quite comfortable in driving each other to school and spending the night watching reruns of The Golden Girls without lamenting about their — er, Lara Jean’s — lack of a social life.



Image via Netflix

(L-R) Janel Parrish as Margot and Anna Cathcart as Kitty in To All The Boys I've Loved Before.

“I love The Golden Girls and I love hanging out with you,” Lara Jean tells 11-year-old Kitty, who canceled her own plans so her sister wouldn’t be alone. But boyfriend or not, these sisters put themselves and each other first. They are more content with loving each other and themselves than finding love — or at least needing it for validation.

Before oldest sister Margot leaves for college in Scotland, she [SPOILER ALERT!] breaks up with her longtime boyfriend Josh. She doesn't want to be tied down to a relationship and she's unwavering in her decision. This decision goes some way in dismantling the pattern that we’ve seen so many times in pop culture where the girl often gets left in the dust for greener pastures. Don’t get me wrong: Every time I watch To All The Boys I've Loved Before, my heart still hurts for Josh and I want the boy next door to have his own happy ending. But Margot’s decision to be selfish about her college experience is not cold or harsh; it’s a power move, and that’s not necessarily a bad thing.

And while Margot jets off for a new adventure, Kitty deliberately sends out the love letters Lara Jean wrote to all her former crushes, including Josh. She gives Lara Jean the push she needs to get out of her shell and act on her feelings, thereby jumpstarting the premise of the movie. Not only does Lara Jean start a fake relationship with Peter to throw off Josh so Margot doesn’t get upset, but she unequivocally shuts down all conversations with him. She refuses to give even the tiniest thought to any lingering feelings she may have. It’s less of an adherence to an arbitrary girl code and more of a natural decision that her love for Margot trumps any adolescent feelings she’s had for Josh.

Image via Netflix

(L-R) Anna Cathcart as Kitty, Janel Parrish as Margot, and Lana Condor as Lara Jean in To All The Boys I've Loved Before.

What the movie so powerfully captures here is Covey girls’ sense of camaraderie — the proverbial “sisters before misters”— that invites viewers to understand that this story, at its core, is a celebration of sisterhood. It’s a rom-com of sisterly love (and the extents the Coveys will go for one another) more than it is of romantic love with cute teen boys.

To All The Boys I've Loved Before doesn’t use gimmicky storylines of sibling rivalry or slut-shaming (Peter is quick to shut that down) to turn this into a caricature version of high school, nor does it perpetuate Lara Jean’s seemingly invisible persona to maintain the shy vs. popular girl dichotomy. In fact, she’s stronger and bolder than Genevieve and Peter — two of the most popular people in school — combined. Lara Jean might not be very experienced, but from the beginning, she’s sure of herself, comfortable in her own skin, and does not ever feel the need to conform to a high school status quo to make a place for herself. When Genevieve makes a snarky remark about her platform boots, Lara Jean is quick to remind her they're vintage. As Peter says, she doesn’t let Gen steamroll over her.

Image via Netflix

(L-R) Lana Condor as Lara Jean, Anna Cathcart as Kitty, and Noah Centineo as Peter in To All The Boys I've Loved Before.

Lara Jean is scared of getting hurt, but she makes Peter work for her trust because she knows her worth. She’s insecure about his feelings for her, but not about whether or not she’s good enough for him. As far as she’s concerned, they’re on equal footing; she makes that quite clear when she suggests that if he’s only dated one girl, he’s not quite the expert he thinks he is. Though the fake romance is his idea, the ball has been in her court since the beginning. She’s delineated her boundaries and decided when to give him a chance and express her true feelings to him. Both scenes of her strutting through the lacrosse field to talk to Peter — when she’s good and ready, mind you, with her back ramrod straight and her head held high — are proof of how self-assured and in control she chooses to be; her popularity or lack thereof has no bearing on that.

Lara Jean’s character may have moments of peak embarrassment in this movie, but she carries herself with confidence and owns her actions, unapologetic about who she is. Much to our chagrin, this movie is fictional, but Lara Jean’s confidence is contagious and all-too-real. While there aren’t enough Peter Kavinskys in the world for all of us, To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before sets a wonderful standard of self-love and confidence that are not bound by social hierarchy. As much as we love falling in love, our love stories start with ourselves.

What's your favorite part of To All The Boys I've Loved Before? Let us know in the comments!

This post has been updated.

Lead image via Netflix

Since moving from downtown Atlanta, I've been sad about not having a convenient commute to Whole Foods or Trader Joe's anymore. To circumvent my lack of access to them, I've been making frequent trips to Publix. It's been one of my go-to grocery stores lately because it has some of the freshest produce and incredible deli selections I've tasted.

Whether my fiancé and I are looking for inexpensive parmesan cheese or pasta salad that doesn't skimp on quality, Publix truly has everything we need! But, I've recently discovered the most amazing appetizer that cost me less than $15 — and I can't wait to share it with everyone who may not have the patience (or know how) to make a delicious charcuterie board yet. With just two ingredients, you can make an easy holiday appetizer that's totally giving bougie! Here's how!

Here's the inexpensive, luxe appetizer from Publix that'll fill your fancy snack needs!

Jasmine Williams

1. Firehook Baked Crackers

My childhood was filled with eating saltine crackers with soup whether I had a viral cold or upset stomach, but I've been looking for something that feels elevated. The problem is that I can be picky about the taste and texture of what I eat. But surprisingly these Firehook Baked Crackers have passed both tests!

They're super crisp and don't have an overwhelming sea salt taste, which makes my taste buds happy. They're also sturdy unlike some flimsy snacks I've tried. This is important because I knew I wanted to pair them with a tasty dip or spread. I just didn't know which until I took a chance on a new brand.

P.S. It does contain wheat, so steer clear if you're allergic to it!

Jasmine Williams

2. Alouette Garlic & Herbs, Soft Spreadable

This soft spreadable has all the makings of what I imagine bliss to taste like. I know you're thinking, "But it's garlic & herbs," — but this is what my uninterrupted staycation desires consist of! It's flavorful, yet somehow manages to remain lightweight...which is honestly rare with spreads. However, this gluten-free option will make you see stars.

A Tasty Two-Ingredient Luxe Appetizer 

Jasmine Williams

Okay, don't judge me...I had to dig in before I snapped a pic. Sorry, but my camera doesn't eat first!

In short, I stand by this quick and inexpensive luxe appetizer from Publix. It's helping me to remember to eat when I'm in the thick of working and caring for a busy toddler. It doesn't require a ton of prep time either. In less than two minutes you'll be tasting a delicious blend of sea salt, garlic, and herbs!

If you're hosting this holiday season, you can delicately arrange this duo on a tray, with the garlic spread dolloped in the middle and the crackers beautifully fanning out around it. However, this is my preferred method of eating it: getting the crackers and dip on my plate as quickly as possible so I can eat it even faster.

Happy snacking!

Follow us on Pinterest for more fun appetizer ideas!

When you’re in need of some relaxation worthy of a year of stressors, look no further than these cozy self-care products. They’re all about winding down, chilling out, and treating yourself to some much-deserved decompression. On our list, you’ll find soothing scents, luxurious skin care, plush confines, and all the other feelings you may be seeking when you want to destress. And we’re willing to bet there are a fair few items that you wouldn’t have thought to look for. With just a few of our selections, you’ll be set to treat yourself or someone special to a day that only a spa could rival.

Thanks for reading about our favorite finds from across the internet! FYI: We participate in affiliate programs and may get a share of the revenue from your purchase.

A Guided Anxiety Journal Can Help You Curb Negative Patterns

Amazon

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, or CBT, is a technique for becoming aware of and changing one’s behaviors and thought patterns. This guided anxiety journal was designed to help you engage in the practice on your own, containing thought-provoking pages and spaces for writing that can help you self-reflect and improve.

See it on Amazon

Give This Meditation Hand Chime a Tap

Amazon

Be it for yoga, mindfulness or some other technique for relaxation, a meditation hand chime can help you keep a calm pace. One tap on this instrument produces a long and even tone than gently fades to silence.

See it on Amazon

Dig Into a Cuisinart Fondue Pot

Amazon

Last we checked, your mouth is a part of you, thus justifying a Cuisinart fondue pot as self-care. Once you’ve melted down some cheese or chocolate, you can get cozy by yourself or with loved ones around this delectable group treat.

See it on Amazon

This Tabletop Tiered Water Fountain Looks and Sounds Rejuvenating

Amazon

With the exception of having a full bladder, the sound of gently trickling water can be a source of relaxation for many. This tabletop tiered water fountain can provide just that, featuring three tiers of reservoirs through which water flows. Plus, the other pillars on this decorative piece are the perfect size for flickering tea candles.

See it on Amazon

Let Your Hair Air Dry With Wave Spray

Amazon

Create effortless beachy waves with the OUAI wave spray. This aromatic hair product adds texture, body, and shine to any hair type. It's color-safe and won't damage a keratin treatment.

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Aromatherapy Fragrance Pillow Packs Are a Tempting Self-Care Buy

Amazon

Some aromatherapy products rely on showering or use in diffusers, but these aromatherapy fragrance pillow packs can be poured right into the tub whenever you need some calming. They come in a pack of 50, offering an assortment of scents that you can use at home and share with friends.

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See Why This 3-in-1 Facial Steamer is So Well-Loved

Amazon

This 3-in-1 facial steamer has been getting a ton of attention for its use in improving skin health. Using Nano-Ionic humidity, this steamer can prove more effective than traditional varieties at penetrating skin and unclogging pores.

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Get Creative With This Felt Succulents Craft Kit

Amazon

Setting aside your gadgets and engaging in a skill with your hands can be a form of self-care you didn’t know you needed. In the case of this felt succulents craft kit, you can put together some surprisingly realistic faux succulent plants that you can use to add some natural color to your environment.

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Get in Position Atop an Amazon Basics Extra Thick Yoga Mat

Amazon

With its additional padding compared to comparable options, the highly rated Amazon Basics extra thick yoga mat is a great starter for getting into yoga. In fact, its cushioned surface is all you need to get stretching while protecting your joints from hard floors.

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Become a Mixologist With This Perfectly Displayed Bartender Kit

Amazon

If your Instagram has multiple photos of beautifully made cocktails, you can bet I'm about to give you a follow (and possibly invite myself to your house for a drink). Make it happen with this lovely bartender kit. It has everything you need to get started making all kinds of cocktails, and it all comes in a handsome bamboo stand that will look gorgeous on your kitchen counter.

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Paint, Wait and Repaint On The Zen Artist Board Mini

Amazon

The impermanence of artwork made on a Zen Artist Board Mini is one of the biggest parts of its appeal for mindfulness and meditation. With water alone, this board can be painted on using the included paintbrush, which eventually erases itself to be painted on anew.

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This Mattress Top Massage Cushion Turns Your Regular Bed Into a Massage Bed

Amazon

A mattress top massage cushion takes two to tango, but it’s well worth nabbing for you and your partner. Once mounted to your bed frame, this cushion can cradle your head face up or face down like in a real massage parlor.

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A Deep Steep Bubble Bath Will Make You Feel and Smell Divine

Amazon

With many scents to choose from and many reviews to back it up, Deep Steep bubble bath is an adult bubble bath formula that’s both soothing and fun. Select from options like lavender chamomile, eucalyptus mint, or pure coconut and treat your senses to the scent and feel, free of parabens, silicones, and other well-known harmful ingredients.

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This Gooseneck Cell Phone Holder Keeps Your Phone Front and Center

Amazon

When you just want to decompress in bed with your phone and watch some videos, you’ll be glad you purchased a gooseneck cell phone holder. Using a strong clamp, this gadget can attach to a bed frame, nightstand or desk to suspend your phone in front of you hands-free.

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Heat Up and Breath in Your Microwavable Scented Stuffed Animal

Amazon

Not only is this microwavable scented stuffed animal a cute and cuddly companion, but it comes infused with a lavender scent. After a little time in the microwave, yours will emit its scent more strongly, not to mention become warm for even better snuggling.

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Indulge With This 20-Finger Scalp Massager

Amazon

Odd as it may appear, this highly popular 20-finger scalp massager should feel heavenly on the top of your head. By gently moving it up and down atop your head, the fingers on this handheld tool gently scratch and massage your scalp.

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These Premium Exfoliating Mitts Are So Popular

Amazon

Oodles of buyers are gushing over these premium exfoliating mitts. Because they wrap around your hands, they are as versatile as your reach, allowing you to make your skincare routine more efficient. It also just works incredibly well according to said buyers.

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A Cordless Electric Hand Massager Gives Your Grabbers a Shiatsu Massage

Amazon

Some of the more neglected parts of your body that also deserve relaxation are your hands. This Cordless Electric Hand Massager addresses various portions of your hand, utilizing both heat and pressure that should make your digits melt with comfort.

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Light Some Relaxing Scents and Watch Your Ceramic Backflow Incense Burner Work

Amazon

Along with 120 included incense cones, this ceramic backflow incense burner adds a mesmerizing visual flare to the art of incense burning. Within the ceramic structure are several ramps off of which the incense smoke flows, giving a waterfall-like effect as it descends into a reservoir in the bottom.

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Address Your Posture On This Neck and Shoulder Relaxer

Amazon

Loads of buyers have found success using this neck and shoulder relaxer, which aims to stretch your neck and even improve your posture. By gently laying down atop it, the relaxer orients your neck in a more ergonomic position, a therapeutic result according to many reviews.

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You Can’t Go Wrong With a Warm Fleece Robe

Amazon

Nobody can resist the allure of getting nice and comfy in a warm fleece robe. This variety is made for both men and women, offering a plush exterior and interior in multiple sizes and colors.

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Treat Your Face to This Clay Mask Set

Amazon

With this clay mask set, you can skip the spa and pamper your face from home. Available in three different combinations, these masks can deeply cleanse your pores and hydrate your skin. Don’t skip out on the cucumber slices for your eyes while you’re at it.

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Try a Candle Wax Warmer As an Alternative to Candles

Amazon

No self-care story would be complete without mentioning a candle wax warmer. Rather than relying on flames, this warmer warms up wax cubes or your existing candles to release fragrances with less fire risk.

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Lean Back and Relax Thanks to a Luxury Bath Pillow

Amazon

A classic buy in the realm of self-care is a product like this luxury bath pillow. With one at your back, you can sit up in your bath and relax rather than sinking in. It’s definitely one of the simplest ways to turn your bath into a spa when you feel like treating yourself.

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Freeze and Reuse an Aculief Mask

Amazon

When it comes to headaches, migraines and other head discomfort, you can find relief in the form of an Aculief mask. Thanks to the gel packs inside, you can freeze this reusable mask and lay it over the problem area to alleviate symptoms.

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Unisex Adult Slippers Are a Cozy Treat For Feet

Amazon

When you’re lounging around the house, the last thing you want to do is step on cold tile flooring/ With a pair of unisex adult slippers on, you can treat yourself to cozy and warm feet no matter where you go in your home.

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A Professional Pedicure Kit Can Treat Your Sole, and More

Amazon

Unless you’re a podiatrist, there’s not much you can’t do for your feet using the tools in this professional pedicure kit. From files and picks to clippers to callus removers and much more, you’ll have the softest tootsies in town.

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Lather Up Using Some Viral African Bath Sponges

Amazon

These African bath sponges are popping off on social media with over 30K bought just last month. The design of these helpful self-care tools is ideal for lathering up soap and exfoliating all at once, and they come in many color combinations.

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Bask in the Warm Glow Of This Diffuser & Himalayan Salt Lamp

Amazon

This diffuser & Himalayan salt lamp combines two favorites in the art of being cozy. The diffuser itself can emit cool scented mist to fill your home with pleasant aromas, while Himalayan salt chunks glow warmly in the reservoir below.

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You Won’t Overheat Underneath Your Cooling Weighted Blanket

Amazon

Combining the secure feeling provided by a weighted blanket with a breathable material comes this cooling weighted blanket. With one of these draped over your body, you can enjoy the comfortable heft for longer periods without overheating beneath it.

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The ProsourceFit Acupressure Mat Can Improve Circulation

Amazon

Tens of thousands of buyers have logged back on to applaud the ProsourceFit acupressure mat. This Best Seller sports over 10K spikes upon which you can sit or lay in order to stimulate circulation, relieve aching muscles, and promote relaxation.

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Have a Snack Atop a Couch Arm Tray

Amazon

For some, self-care consists of having a snack on the couch and enjoying a good show or movie. So in the spirit of couch-care, check out this Best Selling couch arm tray. Its sturdy hinged arms can hold the tray securely on your couch or armchair’s arm, providing an ample surface for snacks and a drink. There’s even a slot for holding up your phone or tablet.

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Wind Chimes Are a Peaceful Piece Of Home Decor

Amazon

The arrhythmic jingle of some wind chimes could be all you need to unwind. Even if you’re not outside with them, these chimes should be audible when a breeze rolls in, acting as decor that’s easy on both the ears and the eyes.

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Some Organic Matcha Green Tea Powder Can Help You Center Yourself

Amazon

A steaming cup of green tea is part of many peoples’ formula for relaxation. So if you’re running low or looking for new methods for treating yourself, this organic matcha green tea powder is a quality choice. The authentic unflavored taste leaves room for you to add your own additions to drink it in its unaltered form.

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Blow Off Some Steam Using This Desktop Punching Bag

Amazon

When all else fails, a desktop punching bag could be the solution you’ve been seeking to blow off some steam. This one comes with both a desk clamp and a suction cup, which can secure the bag to a desk or table as you go a few rounds with it.

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This Hot Stone Massage Set Gives You Access to a Well-Loved Technique

Amazon

As another technique that is used in many real spas, this hot stone massage set has proven to be highly relaxing time and time again. Once heated to temperature by a partner or loved one, the nine variously sized stones are then placed on specific points of the body.

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Stand Beneath a Torrential High Pressure Rain Shower Head

Amazon

There’s little that’s more relaxing than a hot shower — except for a hot shower beneath a high pressure rain shower head. When you’re beneath the wide and even coverage of this attachment, you’ll know why it’s such a popular replacement. Plus, it comes with an additional handheld spraying head.

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Kick Back Atop a Vibrating Massage Bean Bag Chair

Amazon

As if flopping onto a bean bag chair wasn’t relaxing enough, this vibrating massage bean bag chair introduces another layer of chilling. On days when work was extra stressful, you can push the button on the arm and enjoy the strong vibration.

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Organic Aloe Vera Face Gel Hydrates and Soothes

Amazon

If you appreciate self-care products with short ingredient lists, organic aloe vera face gel is right up your alley. This hydrating solution is made to keep your face moisturized and calm irritation by way of natural ingredients.

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Get Cozy in This Human Dog Bed

Amazon

Snuggling with your dog is already one of the most relaxing activities as far as we’re concerned. But to make this self-care activity official, you can do so in a human dog bed. Whether you’re alone or with your fuzzy friend, this bed is big enough to curl up in like you’re one of the pack.

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Electric Blanket Comes in Sizes Up to Queen

Amazon

Most electric blankets come in throw size, but this large variety is available in twin, full and queen sizes as well. With one of those larger sizes, you can fully envelop yourself in its warm and plush surface on a cold day.

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Pick Up a Squishy Lying Bear Night Light

Amazon

A colorful lying bear night light by your bedside, or any of the other glowing animals on this product’s page, is a worthwhile self-indulgence. The mesmerizing lights and cute companionship of this light can help you foster a more comfortable environment, day or night.

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