Joy Looks Different For Everyone — Here’s One Tip For Finding Yours

Rediscovering Your Purpose

Lasan’s journey began after her college graduation in 2009, when the recession meant that jobs were scarce. Even though she left school feeling like she had no purpose, she realized that she could use her time to pour into other outlets.

“[I had] time to be creative, time to explore my talents, and time to really sit down and evaluate what I wanted to do next,” she says. “The jobs I was applying to weren’t calling me in for interviews, but the more honest I was with myself, the more I came to accept that I didn’t even want those jobs! So I took time to get super clear about what a joy-led life looked like for me.”

Coming up with a vision for the life you want to lead is the first step in Lasan’s 3-Step JOYrney To Purpose™, which exists to help you rediscover, reconnect, and recommit with your purpose. The idea of rediscovering your purpose instead of discovering it is an important detail here — because just like priorities, joy can change depending on what season of life you’re in.

“We are constantly evolving, growing, and absorbing new information that transforms our ways of thinking and how we live [and] the same can be said of our joy,” she says. “The things that brought me joy in my 20s aren’t necessarily the same things that bring me joy in my 30s – or at least, not in the same way. So it’s really important that we are always assessing where we are, and evaluating how we feel about things in the PRESENT.”

Not only does focusing on joy benefit the present, Lasan says, but it has a domino effect, because once you rediscover your joy, it opens you up to childlike faith, which gives us access to hope. Suddenly you have a network of different emotions that make every area of life feel brand new.

“Cultivating and protecting our joy nourishes the rest of our lives because it allows us to unlock the power of our purpose, and pour everything into it (without guilt),” Lasan says. “Your purpose is LITERALLY why you were born and what you were put on this planet to do. That doesn’t come into the picture the moment you decide to go on a ‘quest’ for purpose. Your purpose is always present…The challenge is really for us to recognize this early on, and OWN it. It really starts with rediscovering your joy, reconnecting with it in an intentional way, and nurturing it on a daily basis."

How Your Purpose Connects To Your Joy

Lasan says one of the great things about joy and purpose is how interconnected they are (“Oftentimes our purpose is tied to our natural gifts, talents, and things that we consider to be fun…in other words, the things that bring us joy!”) and how we benefit the people around us when we act on them (“What many people don’t realize is that our joy allows us to serve others from a position of lightness and overflow!”).

C.S. Lewis once said that “Love is never wasted for its value does not rest upon reciprocity” and that’s exactly what Lasan is getting at — love is the only thing that doesn’t diminish when it’s given away.

“When you feel good and you’re happy, you see things from a perspective of abundance that makes you more open to helping others – but not from a state of burnout, guilt, and overwhelm where you’re looking to pacify others,” she says. And in turn, that joyful love creates a ripple effect that promotes vulnerability and communication.

“If we engage with joy from this perspective we see that it not only benefits each of us as individuals, but it benefits our families, our friendships, our working relationships, and even the way we engage with strangers and the world-at-large!”

As fun as it is to discuss the theory of joy, it can seem difficult to actually put into practice when so much of our personal lives and shared experiences are dark. That’s why Lasan recommends taking agency over the small, daily things that bring you joy and make you feel more alive.

“The best tip I have about finding joy is this – don’t just make time for joy, you have to be selfish about taking time for joy,” she says. “It can feel counterintuitive and it goes against what so many of us have been taught. But taking time for joy means not waiting for perfect or ‘opportune’ time for joy, but really making sure that you're prioritizing it as a part of your everyday lifestyle.”

That consistency will be a foundational part of your longterm joy, Lasan says. “The more you do, the better equipped you will be to handle hard times when they come, but you’ll also be able to navigate all of life’s blessings presently and with gratitude."