How to Low-Key Slide into Someone’s DMs

Scoot over dating apps, we’ve found a new way to bag the bae of our dreams. We’ve heard plenty of stories of successful DM relationships that left us wondering: What did she say? How did she say it? And how long did she wait to reply? After a girl successfully slid into Michael B. Jordan’s DMs and then proceeded to hang out with him, people were filled with hope to shoot their shots via the web. Social media can be a daunting place though, full of accidentally sending people hearts, screenshotting, and un-sending; we’re here to break down some simple dos and don’ts of sliding in your McDreamie’s DMs.

Dos

1. Be confident. This is the most important — don’t end your statements with “I guess,” “If you want,” or “Sorry.” These statements make it seem like you’re not sure of yourself. Come on, you only get one first impression, so you gotta make it a good one! Figure out what you’re going to say, and say it like you don’t care if they reply or not (even though you’ll likely be staring at your phone waiting for a notification).

2. Appeal to their interests. We know you’ve been creeping on them for a while, and you may or may not have liked most of their pictures and left cryptic emoji captions on a few. You know where they hang out, what kind of music they like, and their dietary restrictions, so use that to your advantage. Try something like replying to their story of a piece of pizza by asking if they’ve ever been to your favorite pizza place in town. Easy.

3. Ask questions. While there’s a lot we can interpret from somebody’s online presence, there is plenty to this person that’s still a mystery (because they’re basically a stranger). When you’re in the DMs and they reply to your joke, introduction, or story, this is the perfect time to ask them about themselves. Where they’re from, how old they are, and what they do are all good basic places to start.

4. Be yourself. Just because Michael B. Jordan replies to his DMs doesn’t mean he’s responding to every “hey” and “you’re so hot” text. It’s the messages that carry character and personality that catch people’s attention, so when you’re going for that first intro, make sure that you sound like yourself. In other words, don’t say anything you wouldn’t say in person.

5. Reply in a timely manner. There’s an age-old idea that if a someone takes an hour to reply to your message, you should take the same amount of, if not more, time to reply to theirs (resulting in a simple conversation sometimes taking days to complete). This idea is ready to be retired, because not only is it annoying to be on the receiving end of someone replying to your messages an hour late, it also does you no good to stare at the message for 59 extra minutes. So forget about thinking you’re replying too fast, and let them know you’re interested as soon as you see that notification.

Don’ts

1. Send memes. Unless it’s a really really relevant meme, you really shouldn’t start an interaction with a new person using a meme. Memes are the modern-day version of flirting with icebreakers; sending a pic of “Justin Bieber” eating a burrito the wrong way is the same as asking “Do you know how much a polar bear weighs?” during a first convo. So save your killer sense of humor for the second or third in-person get-together.

2. Send “Hello??” messages. We all get antsy when that little “seen” text pops up under your message, but it’s important to resist the urge to double message. If days pass and you still haven’t gotten a response, don’t send a message that says “hello” or includes multiple question marks. Most likely the recipient of your attention will think you’re a little weird and not reply at all. Give them time.

3. Play all your cards. Try to avoid giving them your life story right off the bat. It can be hard if you’ve been looking at their selfies for weeks thinking about all the things you could say to them if you got the chance, but keep it brief. Starting off with your name is probably a good first step.

4. Start with a picture of yourself. Even if it’s your best selfie, leading with a photo of yourself may come off as a little self-centered. It’s like going up to someone at a party and screaming in their face, “Look how hot I am!” Keep it strictly text and GIFs until they fall in love with you IRL.

5. Send a message in the middle of the night. So you ignored “Do” number five and decided to wait a little too long to reply to their message; now it’s the middle of the night, and you’re wishing you’d said something earlier and are considering responding now, at 3:06am. Don’t. Do. It. You don’t want to come off as though you’re doing a DM booty call by reaching out at odd hours of the night, and chances are, your message could get buried beneath other notifications before they wake up. Keep your conversation safely between 10am and 8pm to play it safe.

Share your best DM convos with us on Twitter @BritandCo.

(Photo via Getty)

HBO Max renewedEuphoria for a third season back in 2022, but we sadly haven't seen any progress on the show in the way of filming. Though details surrounding the plot for Euphoria season 3 haven't been revealed, we are awaiting the TV show with excitement!

Euphoria has inspired our coolest makeup looks and on-point Halloween costumes, so we can’t wait to see what the next season of this neon-lighted, drama-filled story holds. Here’s what we know about season 3, thus far. Stay tuned for more updates!

Keep reading for everything we know about Euphoria season 3, filming in 2025.

  • Euphoria season 3 is officially moving forward, and will start filming in 2025.
  • Cast members like Zendaya, Sydney Sweeney, Jacob Elordi, and Hunter Schafer are returning.
  • Despite the fact creator Sam Levinson suggest Zendaya's schedule caused Euphoria production delays, the actress said she's "just waiting" to return to the show.

Is Euphoria season 3 coming out soon?

Eddy Chen / HBO

Euphoria Season 3 Release Date

Variety confirmed that we should be seeing Euphoria season 3 in 2026...but after an almost-three year wait...does anyone actually care anymore? I'm excited to see Zendaya return to the role that won her an Emmy (as well as the rest of the cast, obvi), but it's hard to be thrilled about something after such a long time. Luckily, fans are familiar with waiting a long time for new releases (remember that 2 ½-year wait for Euphoria season 2?), and hopefully the pent-up hype will be worth it when the show finally comes to streaming.

What's going to happen in Euphoria season 3?

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Euphoria Season 3 Plot

Season 2 of Euphoria left us with a lot to unpack: Rue’s (potential) sobriety, Lexi’s chaotic play, Fez and Ash’s shootings, Cal’s insane sexual spiral, and of course, the glorious girl fight between Maddy and Cassie. The third season has some loose ends to tie up, and we can’t wait to see how it’s done.

Sam Levinson tells EllethatEuphoria season 3 is more of a “film noir,” and that Rue's plot line will “explore what it means to be an individual with principles in a corrupt world.”

Originally, Sam showed multiple story ideas to both Zendaya and HBO (and although Z doesn't have total creative control, as an executive producer, she does get a say in where her story goes). The show will feature a time jump, bringing the characters closer to the actors' ages. According to Variety, the first draft of the script gave the "meaty" storyline to Sydney Sweeney and Jacob Elordi, and featured Zendaya's Rue as a private detective in more of a background role. More recent rewrites incorporated Z's idea of making Rue, who would now be sober, a pregnancy surrogate. Unfortunately, "the new scripts simply didn’t feel like the show tonally."

HBO chairman & CEO Casey Bloys told Variety that Sam Levinson is furiously working on the scripts. "One of the issues I think that Sam is thinking about is that he doesn’t want to have it in high school anymore. That’s where it was set and what made sense then," he says. "So when you take it out of that, there’s a lot of back and forth about where to set it and how far in the future to set it and all that stuff. But I think he’s got a take that he’s excited about, and he’s busy writing."

Is Storm Reid going to be in Euphoria season 3?

Eddy Chen/HBO

Euphoria Season 3 Cast

No, Storm Reid won't be in Euphoria season 3. On November 20, she revealed she wouldn't return as Zendaya's onscreen sister Gia. “I’m very excited for Season 3,” she said in a Rotten Tomatoes interview at the Governors Awards. “Unfortunately, Gia’s not returning to the third season, but I am so so indebted to the cast and the crew of that show, to HBO. Euphoria’s a really special thing and I’m so glad that that’s a part of my legacy and that I was a part of such a cultural phenomenon.”

However, we also know that Barbie Ferreira (Kat) won’t be returning for season 3, due to butting heads one too many times with the show’s creator, Sam Levinson.

Okay, so who's actually in Euphoria season 3?

Eddy Chen / HBO

At the 2024 Sundance Film Festival, Dominic Fike (who played Elliot in Euphoria season 2) told Variety it “would be dope” to come back for Euphoria season 3, but that “I don’t really talk to them anymore.” And after Angus Cloud's (Fez) tragic passing, some fans were calling for HBO Max to cancel the series.

But when we finally do see the series again, we’ll see more of the main cast: Zendaya (Rue), Sydney Sweeney (Cassie), Hunter Schafer (Jules), Alexa Demie (Maddy), Jacob Elordi (Nate), Maude Apatow (Lexi), and more – but who knows? The production team may surprise us with new additions, like they did with Dominic Fike’s Elliot.

And the cast is even more excited for the show to return than we are! While Sydney Sweeney says she "honestly" doesn't “know anything about it,” (although she's hoping for "Crazy Cassie": "The crazier, the better for me."), Sweeney can't wait to reunite with Zendaya, Jacob Elordi, Alexa Demie, and everyone else from the show.

“They were the crew and the cast that were there at the beginning of my career,” she tells The Hollywood Reporter. “We all came up from different places but came together and were navigating so much at the same time, so it’s really nice having that core group. They’re experiencing a similarity to what I’m going through. It’s nice to have that community.”

Why is Euphoria season 3 delayed?

Eddy Chen / HBO

We've been waiting for Euphoria season 3 for over two years, but there's a very good reason for the delay. After a source told THR Zendaya was to blame, the actress reportedly laughed at the idea. “I will say, I have been off for a couple years, so not delayed because of my [schedule]…I’ve been open, just waiting,” the actress told Vanity Fair. "I haven’t read anything yet, but I’m excited to see what everyone has been working on, and what the future looks like for Euphoria...My most important thing is to do justice by the people who love and care about Rue, and make sure that she’s looked after as a character. I think that’s my number one duty."

Actor Colman Domingo has another explanation for the delay: “[Sam Levinson is] a person who writes and rewrites and writes and rewrites again, because I think he's wrestling with what's important,” he tells GQ. “He's responding immediately to what the ills of the world are. I know that the one thing I can tell you is that he's very much interested in the existential question of who we are right now. Our souls. That's what he wants to figure out with season three.”

“HBO and Sam Levinson remain committed to making an exceptional third season,” HBO says in a statement to Deadlineabout the show's official, if temporary, pause. “In the interim, we are allowing our in-demand cast to pursue other opportunities.”

So much has happened in the real world since the end of Euphoria season 2 that could have an impact on the new installment, and I can't wait to see what that looks like!

When will Euphoria season 3 start filming?

Eddy Chen / HBO

Euphoria season 3 will begin filming in January 2025. “We are shooting Euphoria,” HBO's Casey Bloys said at an HBO/Max press event on November 12. "I think we have a start date, mid to late January. Nothing’s changed...We are shooting the season. I have read the scripts. We’re happy. We’re moving ahead. All of the actors are in the show.”

The Euphoria season 3 delay comes down to significant script rewrites (not to mention how busy the cast is!). According to Variety, the original plan was for the Euphoria cast to work on other projects throughout 2024, and that filming the new season could take at least 25 weeks. However, it looks like that plan could change at any time.

In a March 2024 interview with Who What Wear, Sydney Sweeney shared her excitement to return. "It’s going to be very, very wild,” she says. And regarding the time gap between seasons 2 and 3, Sydney “actually [likes] it because there’s so much room for growth for both me as a person and also Cassie as a character."

Storm Reid, who plays Rue's (Zendaya) little sister Gia in the series, expressed her hope (and a bit of hesitance) in for Euphoria season 3 in talks with E! News at the Challengerspremiere in April 2024. "We're on pause right now, but we're anxious to get back," she said. "If it's meant to be, we'll be back soon and we'll give the audience what they want and deserve. Hopefully, we will be back."

On the other hand, according to an article published by Vanity Fair, another cast member (who wished to remain anonymous) said at the time, “I just don’t think it will happen.”

The anonymous actor also shed some light on the show's delay. “Since January of 2022, we have had a start date of March that turned into June, that turned into January,” they say. “And then they kept pushing every month from then on. It was two full years of HBO telling all the actors we were going back soon, so we couldn’t take some jobs.”

Now that Euphoria season 3 is officially on hiatus, the cast members aren't barred from taking further jobs, they say: “Before last week I couldn’t take any TV jobs. Since they have put it on hiatus, I can now take any job. But what sucks is that we all had more momentum right when the show came out but now it’s been 2 years of waiting.”

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Hunter Schafer, who plays Jules in the series, joined the Call Her Daddy podcast podcast in August 2024, discussing everything from relationships to fame. The topic of whether or not Euphoria season 3 is going to happen came up – as it's pretty hard to ignore at this point – and Schafer immediately got emotional.

Alex Cooper, the host of the podcast asked, "Is season 3 happening? What are we doing?"

"I think everyone feels a certain sense of anticipation for, like, if we are supposed to do a season 3," Schafer said between tears. "Obviously, I'm still coming to qualms with what's happened, and losing people that we really loved and were a part of this family and everything," she said, referring to the passings of co-star Angus Cloud and screenwriter Kevin Turen.

"If we do go back, that's going to be tough," Schafer said. "I think there's a world in which we can channel that into making it a beautiful season 3."

Will there be a time jump in Euphoria season 3?

Eddy Chen / HBO

Multiple stakeholders in the Euphoria-verse expressed their interest in seeing the characters out of high school. When asked about season 3 in an interview with The Hollywood Reporter, Zendaya expressed her eagerness to see what post-East Highland will look like for the cast:

“I think it’ll be exciting to explore the characters out of high school,” said Zendaya. “I want to see what Rue looks like in her sobriety journey, how chaotic that might look. But also with all the characters, in the sense where they’re trying to figure out what to do with their lives when high school is over and what kind of people they want to be.”

Heidi Bivens, the HBO show’s costume designer, hinted further at a time jump between seasons 2 and 3 when talking with Vogue: “There is talk of [season 3] being approximately five years in the future, and that they’re not in high school anymore. Dorothy’s not in Kansas anymore.”

How many Euphoria seasons are there?

Eddy Chen / HBO

There are currently two seasons of Euphoria — both of which you can stream on HBO Max now. And it sounds like Euphoria season 3 will be the final installment. The Euphoria cast is contracted for the junior season, and according to a Variety source, they're all committed to seeing the story "through to the end with a third season."

Sign up for our newsletter to stay updated on all things Euphoria season 3 — plus all the new TV shows coming your way, like Stranger Things 5 and The Last of Us season 2!

This post has been updated.

It's official: Blue Ivy looks totally grown up now — especially in her gorgeous gold gown at the Mufasa: The Lion Kingpremiere. It honestly feels like just yesterday that Beyoncé announced she was born, and now she's a star in her own right! She celebrated her Disney film debut with her family by her side on the red carpet (and everyone looking as gorgeous as ever).

While Jay-Z was one of the latest celebrities caught in the crosshairs of P. Diddy allegations, it didn't stop mom and dad from showing their unwavering support. The family put on a united front, smiling for the cameras and praising Blue's work on her latest Disney film, further proving that they're in this together. Here's everything we know!

Details about the Mufasa: The Lion King premiere

Beyoncé & Jay-Z Amazing Support Of Blue Ivy's Role In 'Mufasa'

Jesse Grant/Getty Images for Disney

Blue Ivy stars in Mufasa: The Lion King as Kiara with Beyoncé voicing Nala again. The highly anticipated film will show Mufasa's origins from a young cub to the majestic king we've come to know, love, and mourn.

In this cute BTS clip, Beyoncé and Blue are initially shown in separate recording booths while the latter says, "Don't stare at me." It's a typical response all kids eventually give their parents, but it doesn't bother Beyoncé. She simply smiles and says, "I can't help it. You're just too beautiful girl." Still, she offers a bit of reassurance to Blue. "I'mma be right here closing my eyes."

Blue briefly talked about what it feels like to work on a movie by saying, "If I like told my younger self that I was in a movie, I'd like never believe myself."

The star couldn't help but tear up as she continued to watch Blue and said, "Give me a second. I'm still...just can't believe that's my baby." While sitting side by Blue, Beyoncé eventually turns to look at her to let her know she's "so proud of her." Even Rumi, Beyoncé and Jay-Z's youngest daughter, makes a quick appearance!

The Mufasa: The Lion King premiere occurred December 9 with Beyoncé, Jay-Z, and grandma Tina Knowles standing by Blue Ivy's side. They looked stunning on the red carpet as they wore coordinating outfits. Although the ladies seemed to be present and excited, Jay-Z temporarily looked distracted while all of them were standing together (via PEOPLE).

If we had to guess, it may have something to do with the recent allegations connecting he and P. Diddy weighing on his mind. After the accusation went public, Jay-Z penned his own public statement and shared it to Roc Nations' social channels. The most heartbreaking aspect of it is realizing his children will be able to see everything.

"My wife and I will have to sit our children down, one of whom is at the age where her friends will surely see the press and ask questions about the nature of these claims, and explain the cruelty and greed of people," he wrote (via X). Only time will tell how everything pans out, but we hope this doesn't overshadow Blue Ivy's success, nor do we want to see people vilify her or her siblings for alleged misdeeds of Jay-Z.

At the end of the day, we're so proud of Blue for letting her light shine bright despite everything else!

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Everyone deals with family issues, but some people had more dysfunctional childhoods than others. Are there ways to tell? According to family psychologist Caitlin Slavens of Mamapsychologistsand therapist Rachel D. Miller, Ph.D., LMFT of Hold The Vision Therapy, yes!

Slavens says, "As a family psychologist, I’ve seen how growing up in a dysfunctional family leaves its mark. Sometimes the signs are glaring, like obvious chaos or neglect." However, she said the signs can also be "more subtle" being that they're "things you don’t even realize were 'off' until you’re older." You may even "start noticing patterns in yourself or your relationships" if you've become retrospective, according to her.

Here are all the subtle signs you grew up in a dysfunctional family

1. You're never sure what kind of mood your parents will be in before you walk in the living room or kitchen.

Emma Bauso

Let's put this on record: parenting is tough — especially on top of trying to maintain a work-life balance. But, this doesn't mean you're meant to be unsure of what to expect every time you come around your parents. If you have to "'read the room'" a lot "before speaking," Slavens indicates this is one of the more subtle signs of dysfunction.

This is where you may have learned how to become passive-aggressive if that's something you struggle with. The reason for this is because "clear and direct communication is avoided and/or seen as bad or aggressive," according to Dr. Miller.

2. You tend to feel like you're constantly compared to and in competition with your siblings.

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My heart truly wants to believe this isn't intentional behavior from parents, but I can't say I haven't heard people talk about feeling like they'd never measure up to the 'golden child' of their family. You may have felt insecure about your grades, the college you chose to go to, your career goals, or even your physical appearance. Slavens says this "struggle with self-worth or second-guessing yourself constantly" is yet another sign that your family's dynamic wasn't the healthiest.

Also, Dr. Miller says this could've caused you to learn to "shrink yourself in the presence of loved ones." Even worse, you may "feel the need to hide pieces of yourself in order to be loved and accepted."

3. There was constant yelling and screaming during arguments, making you fearful of disagreements or hardships.

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If you grew up in a home where arguments always led to screaming and yelling, chances are you're not a fan of loud voices or hard moments. Honestly, Slavens says it's not hard to believe that "conflict make you anxious, even when it’s minor." Unsurprisingly, you may have become a referee during these arguments and currently find yourself being a mediator in your platonic or romantic relationships. Why?

Dr. Miller says, "You constantly feel the need to manage everyone else’s emotions often at the cost of your own needs and wellbeing." You know, to keep the peace.

Here are some more obvious signs you grew up in a dysfunctional family

4. You had to take on a parental role when one of your parents decided to stop being an adult.

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I imagine that having an emotionally immature parent is one of the most aggravating and stressful things to deal with. Not only that, but you may have had to help keep the household afloat. You may have had to get a job or two to help pay bills, listening to an adult conversation as your mom or dad laid their problems at your young feet, and more!

If you "family roles were flipped" and you "maybe had to parent your own parents," Slavens says this is a form of emotional dysfunction.

5. You weren't allowed to go anywhere with your friends because your parents wanted to keep an eye on you at all times.

Ketut Subiyanto

Slavens says boundaries that "didn't exist" or "were rigid and controlling" is a sign your home was a little...interesting. Being concerned about your whereabouts is one thing, but it's another when you're unable to do anything without your parents' eagle-eyes on you. Something as simple as going to the mall with your friends may have become a lecture about the dangers of shoplifting or car wrecks. Again, these are valid concerns but they shouldn't be treated like the verbal form of doom scrolling.

6. You consistently witnessed one of your parents abuse alcohol or drugs at home.

Ksenia Chernaya

This is a tough because substance abuse is so prevalent in varies socioeconomic statuses and communities. From the functioning alcoholic to the one who becomes belligerent after they've had too much to drink, it always affects those around them. Slavens says if "there was ongoing neglect, substance abuse, or verbal/physical aggression," your home probably didn't safe.

I recognize some of these signs of a dysfunctional family. But that doesn't mean they're affecting my current relationships, right?

Ron Lach

I hate to break it to you, but it's possible your childhood wounds have shown up before. "Dysfunctional dynamics don’t stay in childhood — they tend to creep into how you connect with others," says Slavens. Similarly, Dr. Miller agrees that "we typically repeat what we learned at home with our families in our other relationships." How?

"This includes the beliefs and rules we follow, often completely subconsciously, about what can and can’t talk about and why, as well as what emotions are allowed to be expressed, who can express them and how, and how we should or must respond to those people and their emotions," explains Dr. Miller.

Another way to look at this is how Slavens has outlined it:

In Platonic Relationships:

  1. Overextending yourself to please others, even at your own expense
  2. Feeling like you have to "earn your friends' affections.
  3. Avoiding vulnerability because it feels unsafe.

In Romantic Relationships:

  1. Struggling to trust your partner or feeling overly suspicious
  2. Repeating patterns like dating people who are emotionally unavailable or controlling.
  3. Feeling overly responsible for your partner's happiness — or relying on them for yours.

OMG! How do I unlearn habits from my dysfunctional family?

Antoni Shkraba

Honestly, everyone has a few bad habits they've carried from their childhood to adulthood. You're not an outlier because some things weren't 100% normal so I don't want you to feel like you're a failure for not having having it all together. "Dysfunction doesn’t have to define your future relationships," Slavens assures. Dr. Miller says you can start to unlearn things "that aren't working for you anymore" by "gathering your family's larger context to gain insight into how and why, for them, the behaviors make sense."

By taking a look at your family's "history and larger social and political contexts" gives you a chance to "see them as whole people with full lives," she says. Once you do that, she believes "you can examine what pieces make sense for you to keep and what parts you'd like to learn to do differently." Her other suggestion? Don't forget you're ability to utilize a "therapist who works systemically, like an LMFT" who "can be a huge support in this process."

Anastasia Shuraeva

Slavens' tips include the following:

  1. Practice self-awareness: Notice when a response feels automatic — like people-pleasing or shutting down during conflict — and ask yourself, Is this helping me, or is this a leftover habit from the past?
  2. Set boundaries: If your childhood lacked healthy boundaries, learning to say “no” without guilt is a game-changer. Boundaries protect your energy and teach others how to treat you.
  3. Learn healthy conflict skills: If conflict made you feel unsafe growing up, it’s natural to avoid it. But healthy conflict is necessary in relationships. Practice expressing your needs calmly and directly.
  4. Therapy, therapy, therapy: A good therapist can help untangle the messy, “weird” things that got normalized and give you tools to rebuild healthier ways of relating to yourself and others.
  5. Surround yourself with healthier models: Whether it’s friends, mentors, or books/podcasts, seek examples of functional relationships and start observing what feels different.

While you're busy unlearning things, Dr. Miller also wants you to remember something. "Recognize that how your family does something is simply that; how your particular family system figured out and were taught to navigate the world. It isn’t inherently right because you’ve normalized it nor is the way another person or family does it inherently wrong," she says.

Slavens' final thoughts? "It’s not about blaming your family but recognizing how your experiences shaped you — and giving yourself permission to do things differently. You’re allowed to rewrite the script."

Visit the top signs to recognize if you have toxic friends on Brit + Co!

Ahhh…Paris Geller. Where does one even begin with the best Gilmore Girl whose name isn't actually Gilmore? The woman we all came to know and love. The purveyor of backhanded compliments, deadpan humor, the quickest wit one can imagine and an absolutely ungodly work ethic. The sole character of the series who I would 100% watch a spin-off of, and love every minute. Sure — she once said that everyone around her needed to be sterilized immediately. And that Rory’s boyfriend offers “nothing to women or the world in general.” And that she can “scare the stupid out of you. But the lazy runs deep.”

She may, in fact, be the only character whose absurdity warrants such unhinged comments, and I am so here for it. You may be reading this because you too believe that Paris Geller deserves way more praise than she receives. Or you hate her. Or perhaps you don’t even know who she is. Regardless, allow me to delight you with the many — shall I say — unique musings of my favorite Gilmore Girls character, and explain exactly why Paris was not only what the cult-classic show needed, but the feminist icon TV needed, too.

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So let’s start from the beginning. Paris Geller (played by Liza Weil) joined the GG crew in Season 1, right as Rory Gilmore (the show’s sort-of protagonist) walked into Chilton Academy, a private school where Paris was attending, for her first day. A far cry from Rory’s relatively timid and soft-spoken personality, Paris tore up the screen with her high-strung personality and immediate rivalry with Rory (Rory did not feel the same), who Paris viewed as the only candidate who could possibly challenge her spot at the top of the class standing. As the year progresses, the two become friends, which of course Paris still highly questioned.

The rest of their high school experience is plagued with repeated ups and downs, from Paris’s parents’ highly publicized divorce to their joint student government campaign and, most notably, Paris’s C-SPAN meltdown, courtesy of a Harvard rejection fueled by what she can only assume to be wide-spread knowledge that she lost her virginity. Despite losing the Valedictorian slot to Rory (which Paris comes to terms with after finding out Salutatorians tend to be more successful), Paris walks across the graduation stage and accepts her diploma from the school’s headmaster, to which she iconically quips, “no hard feelings.”

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Fast forward to Paris’s first year at Yale, a school she knew Rory was attending but had no intention of ever seeing again. Not to the surprise of Paris’s life coach, the two frenemies were placed together as suitemates, a pairing that ultimately served as a catalyst for lifelong friendship. Throughout college, Paris pursues pre-med and pre-law degrees, joins the Yale Daily News alongside Rory, dates an elderly professor (he passes away, leaving Paris to grieve), moves on with the editor of the Yale Daily News, Doyle McMaster, and potentially saves Rory from abandoning Yale forever by admitting to Lorelai that Rory is the only person who ever listened to her, challenged her and motivated her.

Paris then proceeds to become the editor of the Yale Daily News, a position in which her power-hungry tendencies took full-force, resulting in a forcible resignation, kick Rory out of their shared apartment, let Rory move back into their shared apartment (now with Doyle), be accepted to a slew of prestigious medical and law schools. She ultimately chose to attend med school and break up with Doyle, to which he refused, and tells Rory that they’re on their own but she can still do great things (Of course this doesn’t last, the two are meant to be best friends.)

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Somehow this doesn't even scratch the surface of the character of Paris. As you can tell, Paris is a fiercely loyal, protective woman who fights for herself to no end. She (literally) doesn’t care what other people think (so long as they’re not within her immediate circle) and never stops pursuing her dreams, no matter how many times she probably should have. She is the epitome of feminism in modern television — perhaps taken to an extreme — and serves as a necessary counterweight to Rory’s floundering sense of self.

So long as she keeps her need for perfectionism in check, Paris has one of those few personality types whose wild ambition and outspokenness is directly beneficial to her success, a success that she, and only she, can define. Sure, she has an exaggerated sense of self-importance, but when balanced by Rory’s soft-but-straightforward approach, Paris can quickly reset, reevaluate and move forward.

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rory & paris (175)

That's the thing with Paris — she’s always moving forward. She doesn't get into Harvard? Tough. She takes a few days to wallow before considering her other options: Yale, Columbia and Princeton. She doesn’t know whether to choose med school or law school, so she takes stock of her bearings, reflects on her past dreams, and makes a clear, concise decision that she moves forward with.

Her brutally honest nature (both internally and externally) is exactly why Paris works. She’s generous when needed, comfortable with giving tough (and oftentimes tougher) love, is able to express vulnerability with the people she loves, doesn’t allow outside influences to affect her path and never let’s someone (especially a man) tell her she’s less than (*cough, cough*—Rory). For an early 2000s show, she showed women that there is power in education. There’s power in stepping away from a caretaker role. There’s power in expressing your opinion, no matter your age.

Image via WB

There’s no doubt in my mind that she’s inspired countless women over the years — after all, she’s inspired me! Even though she’s had her controversial moments, she’s always been a cheering voice for women, even if it’s behind her resting grimace. For these reasons, and so many more, I am hereby deeming Paris Geller the best of Gilmore Girls — the heroine, perhaps, and a feminist icon to all.

What's your take on Paris Geller? Let us know in the comments, and sign up for our email newsletter for more pop culture musings!

Header image via Netflix, Warner Bros

This post has been updated.

Gilmore Girlstakes up more of my brain space than I'd care to admit. The show is undeniably great. I mean, there's a reason it's become an absolute cultural phenomenon! The banter is witty and memorable, the Stars Hollow, Connecticut setting is warm and friendly, and the character dynamics feel natural and comforting. All of these elements combined create the perfect comfort show thatI personally rewatch again and again. However, despite having an overall positive opinion of the show, there is one bone I have to pick with it. This grievance makes my blood boil and keeps me tossing and turning at night.

While I can't pose my all-too-important question to the creators of the show, I will ask it to you, reader: Why in the world was Lane Kim's storyline such a travesty? Considering the show is not shy about uplifting and celebrating Rory (despite her many mistakes) it feels especially unfair how short of a stick Lane (played by Keiko Agena) truly got. Here are my unfiltered thoughts on the subject.

Lane deserved better after a life of seeking independence

Photo via WBLane Kim's Treatment On "Gilmore Girls" Is The Ultimate TV Tragedy

Throughout Lane's formative teenage years, she was forced to hide her true identity and interests in order to appease her mother. From hiding CDs in her floorboards and changing her clothes when she got to school, Lane was under a lot of pressure to keep her mom happy, while still trying to figure out who she was. Her mother even kicked her out after finding out about her "secret life," causing Lane to have to move into Rory's dorm. Rory, on the other hand, had a mother who supported her every dream and who she could be fully herself with.

I'm not sure why only one of these two besties got to live out their dreams, but if it did have to play out this way, it should have been Lane Kim. Given how difficult her upbringing was, couldn't the show have given her a win by having *her* be the one who gets to follow her dreams?

Lane's love life is lackluster

Image via Saeed Adyani/Netflix

Once again, the show propped up Rory and gave her not one, not two, but three love interests. Whether or not you love all three of them, we can all admit that each boyfriend was compatible with Rory in their own way, and helped her learn and grow. Lane, however, did not get this. Her first boyfriend, Dave, is great. He's kind and sweet and understanding of her family situation, but the show breaks them up because they can't handle being long-distance. (Technically, we know actor Adam Brody had to leave for The O.C. but where is the justice??!)

After Dave, it all goes downhill from there for poor Lane. She ends up with Zack, who isn't bad but isn't great. And, as soon as Lane is finally getting to pursue her passion by going on tour with her band, she finds out she and Zack are pregnant. Considering how long Lane dreamed of getting to be her authentic herself and openly express her interests, it feels cruel that this twist of fate took it away from her at this exact moment.

Lane made the best of her situation

Image via Neil Jacobs/Netflix

Despite Rory having almost every opportunity available to her, we find out in Gilmore Girls: A Year in the Life that she is making bad decisions (like, er, sleeping with an engaged man) and is struggling to find her way. Lane, on the other hand, has made the best out of the cards she's been dealt. She's still married to Zack, is taking care of her twins, and has even kept music in her life by joining a band. I can't help but think if Lane can forge ahead despite all of her unfortunate circumstances, how fantastic could her life have been if the writers had served her just a little bit more good fortune?

Lane could have served as the role model so many girls needed

Image via Saeed Adyani/Netflix

Lane's experience mirrors many Asian-American girls' lives. She had a strict upbringing and struggled to strike a balance between fitting in with her American peers and forming her own identity, while still trying to manage her mother's expectations of who she should be. As an Asian-American, Lane's experiences mirrored many of my own, and, at a time when there was such little Asian representation, this was extremely impactful.

With the lack of representation at the time, it was even more important that Lane was dealt an ending that she and her viewers could be proud of. Instead of turning her into somewhat of a cautionary tale, her story could have been utilized to empower an audience of individuals who saw themselves in her. For that reason, Lane's treatment on Gilmore Girls will never quite sit right with me.

What do you think about Lane Kim's storyline on Gilmore Girls? Let us know in the comments and check out our guide to Where Is The Gilmore Girls Cast Now? to keep up with your favorite Stars Hollow residents (even if they're not in Stars Hollow anymore).

Lead image via Warner Bros

This post has been updated.