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What is a tradwife?

A tradwife is just short for "traditional wife," meaning that a woman falls into the more stereotypical or traditional roles for women in society — think cooking, cleaning, domestication, or homemaking. None of these acts are inherently negative or punitive for a tradwife, but simply the way they live their lives and lean into those traditional roles.

Is this attainable for most women?

Dr. Charlynn Ruan, Licensed Clinical Psychologist and the founder of Thrive Psychology Group, explains that it's not harmful for a woman to choose to be a homemaker "as long as she is in an arrangement that protects her financially and otherwise." For most women, however, this lifestyle is solely dependent on your partner. You cannot work a full-time job, raise your children, be a wife, and cook completely from scratch every single day. Even the recent Sunday Times article featuring Ballerina Farm suggests that she would lay in bed for weeks from exhaustion trying to keep with this lifestyle.

Given how dependent this lifestyle ultimately is, Dr. Charlynn recommends that you have an arrangement in place that protects you from solely relying on your partner to take care of you financially. She says that her concern is that women aren't seeing the long term consequences of the “tradwife” role and are instead inextricably linking one’s financial stability and wellbeing with one’s relationship. This has, historically, not often worked out well for women.

Can the tradwife lifestyle be harmful?

While the tradwife trend may seem fun to consume, it could potentially have longterm mental health effects that we have yet to see. I talked to licensed mental health professional, Natalie Rosado, to ask what implications this may have and she said it affects these spheres of womanhood:

• Autonomy: These women are portraying a deflection of self, instead focusing on the servitude of their family. Which can be an incredible gift, and joy for many, but the content is primarily focused on the servitude of others, thus communicating the message that autonomy/independence as a woman doesn't matter.
• Unrealistic Expectations: Rosado says that this new fad is enchanting to look at but is subconsciously romanticizing an unrealistic expectation of motherhood and family roles. She said that this could be detrimental to mental health because it can create immense pressure on women to live up to these standards, leading to feelings of inadequacy, guilt, and low self-esteem when they inevitably fall short.
• Mental Health Risks: Women have increasingly high expectations put on them by so many people: society, their families, their husbands, their kids, other women. So this is just creating another layer of expectations for them to meet, which, however unrealistic, will make women guilty that they are not meeting these standards.
• Perpetuation of Gender Stereotypes: Rosado says that this aesthetic reinforces outdated gender stereotypes, which can hinder any progress we may have made toward gender equality. She says that this perpetuation suggests a woman's primary value lies in only her domestic abilities. This way of thinking can be incredibly damaging to her sense of worth and potential.

Who is Nara Smith?

Nara Smith was essentially deemed the mom of the tradwife trend, based on her Tiktok claim to fame for creating outlandishly fresh, "from scratch" meals in full glam and a gown at six in the morning. Smith is only 23 years old, but is already a mom to three children, stepmom to another child, wife, model, content creator, and homemaker. Her husband, Lucky Blue Smith, is also a Tumblr "It Boy" turned model. They married each other quite young, and immediately started having children to start a family. The two now live in Texas, but previously lived in L.A. and Germany (where Nara's family is from).

Smith started off with rather simple recipes like easy Mediterranean dishes, but the more followers she gained, the progressively more difficult she made her dinners and the more elaborate gowns she wore. It became clear that she was going to play into this "tradwife" culture as much as possible.

Why does she live this lifestyle?

While I've come to enjoy this content, it can definitely be bit jarring when it's noon on a Sunday and I still haven't cooked breakfast — and definitely not from scratch. And although Smith may have multiple nannies or family members watching her kids while she films all of this, her content becomes much more relatable when you realize that it stems from her having debilitating eczema that is caused by what she eats so she cooks from scratch to prevent that. So although Smith's recipes have gotten more and more elaborate and untouchable, it takes a sweeter tone when you realize that she's cooking from scratch in order to give her and her family a healthy lifestyle that doesn't cause her skin to flair up.

I know from experience, having eczema myself, some of the products in America can be particularly unhealthy and modified so it makes complete sense that she would want to protect herself — and her skin — from that. Especially since, her parents are from South Africa and Germany, where the food is a bit more healthy and less processed.

Is there a positive impact when it comes to tradwives?

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While this trend has its implications, there are many who say that — like any fad on social media — it has to be taken with a grain of salt. You have to view it as fiction, because that's partly what it is. There aren't many average people who have the ability and resources to wake up before a 9-5 to make three meals from scratch in a full face of makeup and dress — it's simply unrealistic.

So, if you take tradwife videos as fiction — like most reality shows — then you're able to take a step back and enjoy it for what it is: content and inspiration. In the case of Smith, she's a stunningly gorgeous woman with a sweet family and a penchant for recreating complicated and elaborate meals. You can either ignore it, or enjoy it! I can definitely say that I decided to make a few of Smith's recipes myself...they were failures, but I still tried!

The point is, this content can be fun! And as someone who's watched far more videos than I'd like to admit, I've definitely seen a ton of moments that are so outlandish and entertaining that I have to wonder if Smith is trolling us. So, I present to you five moments where Nara Smith went so tradwife that I'm not sure what's real and what's fake.

Nara Smith Makes Her Own Cheese

@naraazizasmith absolute perfection 🫶🏽 #easyrecipe#homemade#baking#toddlersoftiktok#grilledcheese#fypシ♬ Me Cry - NGOTUAN NGUYX

One of the first times I came across Nara Smith was when she made grilled cheese. I remember thinking, "Oh that's great that she makes her own bread — how cute." Then she began to curdle and cook her own cheese, and I was fascinated immediately. This isn't your average home-cooked meal, this is a tradwife home-cooked meal. With fresh baked bread and cheese for her toddlers upon request.

Nara Cooks A Mediterranean Meal In A Gown

@naraazizasmith family dinners 🥺 #easyrecipe#homecooking#fypツ#mediterranean#dinnerideas♬ Just Give Me One More Day - Alej

This next video came on my FYP, and I realized that she has to be playing into this narrative that people have created of her: the picture perfect "tradwife." And it's smart! In fact, it's a genius marketing tactic. People are already talking about how crazy she is for getting glammed up to cook from scratch, so why not make it even crazier? Honestly, I love it. The more unattainable it is, the less guilty I feel for not being able to cook at all most days. The more the lore intertwines with reality, the more digestible it becomes.

Nara Smith Cooks Crepe In Chanel

@naraazizasmith Oh my… what do you like on your crepes or pancakes?🫶🏽 #easyrecipe#homecooking#dessert#fypツ#crepes#marriage♬ La vie en rose (Cover Edith Piaf) - 田东昱

Only Nara Smith could make home-made Nutella and crepes in a full Chanel Ready-To-Wear outfit that costs upwards of $20,000. In this video, she makes her own home-made Nutella with hazelnuts that she roasted and cooked herself. Then she proceeds to make the crepe from scratch as well. Let's hope she didn't leave a scratch on her Chanel outfit, because that's an expensive mistake. But then again, with her over 9 million followers, she can probably afford it!

Nara Smith Makes Home-Made Bubblegum

@naraazizasmith this was fun! What’s your favorite roadtrip snack? #easyrecipes#homecooking#fypツ#candy#bubblegum♬ Just Give Me One More Day - Alej

In typical Nara Smith fashion, she makes her own bubblegum! I didn't even know this was possible (a phrase I constantly utter when watching her videos), but it's fun to think about doing. It seems relatively easy, and I'd imagine it's quite yummy! This is an unhinged moment that people have been loving to recreate! BRB, adding the ingredients to my cart right now...

Lucky Smith Makes Sunscreen

@naraazizasmith 🤍 #fypツ#easyrecipe#sun#fromscratch#skincare#marriage♬ Just Give Me One More Day - Alej

In this incredibly unhinged moment, Nara has her husband make sunscreen from scratch... that's right. Sunscreen. While this may be fun to watch, dermatologists have come out to say how very dangerous and irresponsible this is to do yourself. This video has to be one of her most unhinged and controversial videos, which occurred after she made her own toothpaste in a separate video. Let's keep to the FDA approved ones for now, folks!

“As I went through a very long journey of finding I did have a mental health diagnosis — and then I was misdiagnosed and then I had to go through that — I was blessed to have the resources to do that,” Teefey, who received an ADHD and trauma diagnosis after a 20-year bipolar misdiagnosis, says. “Whenever I started my journey of discovering what mental condition I had…I didn't have anybody to lean into or explain the way I was feeling.”

While these personal experiences helped Teefey better understand mental health, it wasn’t until she produced Netflix’s 2017 series 13 Reasons Whythat she saw just how far the mental health conversation goes. The hit show went viral almost as soon as it aired because of its realistic depiction of mental health and all the aftershocks of trauma.

“After we did 13 Reasons Why and saw the reaction and the need for that support, me and Selena were trying to really figure out what could be next,” Teefey says. “Everybody was releasing things [at] different times. It's like you have to have 12 apps to have a program, and then remember to use them all. So that's when we decided to create a mental fitness ecosystem. So it's all-encompassing, but there's something for everyone.”

“We're not a medicinal company [but] we do have an advisory committee that oversees everything that we do,” Teefey continues. “We're technically not doctors, but we are for everyone when it comes to feelings. Everybody has feelings and they can go to our content hub and just kind of explore that for a while.”

Admittedly, that exploration bit is pretty fun. The articles are inspiring, and the worksheets (which are each created by an expert) are incredibly helpful. Seeing every program, article, and podcast episode feels like an opportunity to start fresh, but once you have all the ideas in front of you, what do you actually do? Teefey recommends journaling, even if it’s just a sentence every day. (She also loves watching journaling videos from Planning Annie: “Anytime I'm feeling sad or like a little unmotivated, I put her on.”)

Journaling every day, even if your entries are short, allows you to track your mood over an extended period of time. If you notice a consistent sadness, for example, it could be a sign it’s time to check in with your doctor. Plus, journaling can help prepare you for the conversations mental health appointments bring up.

“Sometimes if you go into a therapy session and you're not really settled or concrete in who you are and what may be going on, you might go through what I went through, which is being misdiagnosed,” Teefey says. “It's more important for you to know who you are and what you need prior to going in. So you can give that to them instead of them guessing and working around that process with you.”

Establishing a consistent routine can help decrease your stress, whether you’re eating the same breakfast every day, or you stick to a tried and true skincare regimen like Sydney Sweeney’s Cassie does on Euphoria. I immediately thought of this teen drama when Mandy Teefey mentioned how important her 4 a.m. routine is. But while Cassie spends time doing her skincare and makeup, Teefey spends time nurturing her soul.

“If I don't have [that routine], I'm usually really off kilter,” she says. “So I get up at 4 when everyone's still asleep, and I found that time could be about me, and I'm not taking it away from anybody. And so that's really what helped me be more grounded throughout the day.”

I can attest that my own quiet time in the morning is vital for a successful day — as is knowing what my boundaries need to be. Because honestly, boundaries can change daily! Teefey and I both acknowledge we have to stay away from sad music to protect our mental health, and she also recommends staying off social media when you feel your mental health struggling.

“I can go three days without looking at social media and then when I go on there, I start having anxiety because I'm like, ‘Oh my gosh, I haven't liked this person. I haven't even liked our own pictures [for] Wondermind.’ And then I start feeling guilty,” she says. “There's just some kind of [expectation] to do social media and you really don't. Not everybody needs to know everything, you know? There's beauty in privacy.”

Even Selena Gomez admitted at the 2024 Time100 Summit that taking time off Instagram "was the most rewarding gift I gave myself."

The idea of staying off social media is way easier said than done (speaking from first hand experience here). If you feel like you’re drowning in engagement announcements, anxiety-inducing news, and FOMO, Teefey recommends keeping tabs on your reactions to gauge when it’s time to take a serious break.

“If it invokes any emotion that is a negative emotion, I [know] it's not worth being angry about, it's not worth losing sleep about,” she says. “It just feels like there's an unintentional taunting on social media and, ‘Wait a minute, is that about me?’ You don't know this person and then you start running with all this stuff in your mind.”

Like every area of life, social media is all about balance, and if you’re looking to unplug while still staying informed, Mandy Teefey recommends bringing a journal with you when doing your morning news scroll — that way, you can process emotions while keeping tabs on what’s happening. “If anything evokes emotion, I'm meditating during the quiet time,” she says.

Studies have found journaling can help decrease your anxiety, and that it can help you break obsessive thought cycles. And while you’re the only one who can process your thoughts and emotions, it’s important not to isolate yourself from your community — especially when you’re struggling. “You gotta build trust and you gotta build the boundary of who you volunteer [your] help to,” she says.

When it comes to her own daughters, Mandy Teefey knows it’s a process. “You have to work with them and meet them where they're at, and then see the help they need and don't assume [they’re going through] what you went through,” she says. “You've got to really understand them to be able to give that advice.”

In her own life, Mandy Teefey got to experience building that trust first-hand with Selena Gomez! “One time it was very, very cold in California and me and Selena were on the opposite sides of the pool,” she says. “We were in sweats and she says, ‘Do you trust me?’ And I went, ‘Yeah.’ And she goes ‘Okay, if you trust me, on three, we're gonna jump in this ice cold pool.’”

While Teefey wasn’t convinced, she trusted Gomez, and they both ended up in the freezing cold water! Which is both a funny story and a fond memory: “We couldn't get out of the pool because [our clothes were] so heavy. It was madness!”

“There's a lot of things I know my daughters don't tell me and that's their right,” she continues. “It's so sensitive between teenagers — especially teenagers — and their parents. They're going through that phase and they don't want to be around them and they don't wanna tell them things. It's definitely not easy but maybe put some feelers out there and just make sure that they know you're there and make it okay to have these conversations.”

Thanks to all this actionable advice, we know that Mental Health Awareness month isn’t limited to TikTok videos or Instagram posts we can reshare. There are real tips we can use to take care of ourselves — and a place to go when we need a boost.

Watch Our Full Interview With Mandy Teefey Here!

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Nicola Coughlan (who plays Penelope Featherington — er, Bridgerton — on the show) and Hannah Dodd (Francesca Bridgerton) reunited to sit front row at Gucci's Milan Fashion Week show on September 20. "Thank you @sabatods for a beautiful show and a class party after," Nicola said on Instagram, while Hannah added, "@sabatods you are magic. 💛 u @gucci - thank you for a gorgeous trip x."

The two actresses sat beside Daisy Edgar-Jones and Dakota Johnson, and looked stunning in complementary outfits that were totally giving Mary Kate and Ashley.

Hannah rocked a white button down and jeans with pointed-toe heels and a camel-colored bag, while Nicola paired the dreamiest capelet and white button down dress with bejeweled heels. And TBH, this duo has me dreaming about what Bridgerton would look like in 2024!

Now that the Ton knows Penelope is Lady Whistledown, she's going to have all kinds of celebrity that would totally score her a front row ticket to fashion week in the present day. And as a former wallflower, I think Penelope sees and understands shy Francesca in a really special way.

Ahead of Bridgerton season 3, Nicola told Brit + Co that she loved seeing Penelope "finding her self-worth — that side of her I really loved getting to play." Hannah also admitted she feels a similar shyness to Francesca amid the buzz of joining the global phenomenon.

"I'm so excited to see what the writers come up with," she saidof Bridgerton's (and Francesca's) future. "I just hope she steps into herself a little bit more and kind of goes after things that make her happy, and knows that she's deserving of that. But I'm new here. So, like anything they give me, I'm gonna be happy with."

I can't wait to see how these characters continue to grow and evolve, and I hope we get another Bridgerton reunion soon!

Tell us your favorite Bridgerton cast moment in the comments and check out our interview with the cast!