How to Be Honest Without Being Mean

Having to address tough topics at work or with people you care a ton about is the worst, even when you’re a crystal-clear communicator who has perfected the art of body language, never interrupts anyone, and has mastered walking that fine line between confidence and cockiness. After all, no one wants to share something that might sink someone’s spirit or cause conflict. Since we all want to be liked, and having to share something less-than-stellar at some point is pretty much inevitable, we talked with Raleigh, NC-based Thumbtack pro and certified life coach Lisa Kincaid. She reminds us that being likable is about more than just feeling good — it can directly impact your career success and personal relationships — so she’s sharing how you can say what needs to be said in a way that’ll help you keep the respect you’ve worked so hard to earn.

Why We Care About Being Likable

Kincaid believes that being able to stand your ground while maintaining your relationships is critical for living a life that’s true to who you are and what you believe in. But she also thinks it’s vital to pay attention to how you do it: “Whether it’s personal or professional, being ‘likable’ matters because it increases your ability to lead others, create, and inspire others.”

When we ask for specific contexts, Kincaid clues us in that this applies in biz, personal endeavors, and all kinds of relationships, and she reminds us that you’ll always want and need people in your corner. “Remember that the idea of ‘likable’ is much more than just being a nice person. It’s about being approachable and having the ability to feel and convey empathy, compassion, humor, trustworthiness, and confidence.” In other words, being likable is super closely tied to emotional intelligence — a skill Kincaid promises can be developed and improved.

Tactics to Maximize Your Likability

Anyone who’s had to speak up knows how hard it can be. Since fears range from being perceived as a bad person to feeling vulnerable or even stepping on toes, Kincaid is giving us some tried-and-true tactics to consider when having to say something that the other person will be less than ecstatic to hear.

1. Share with honesty. “Leading with honesty (and not hiding facts) promotes quick respect,” Kincaid advises. “People tend to know when things aren’t exactly as they seem on some level, which can lead to distrust and/or a defensive response.” She explains that when you tell it like it is, without delay and with honesty, those receiving the bad news or an opinion you’re afraid to share are more likely to receive it well and respect you.

2. Embrace your positivity. Though consistently being the most cheerful person in the room might earn you a few eye rolls, Kincaid says being positive packs a major punch when it comes to being perceived as likable in a tough situation. “When you need to speak up or deliver bad news, try focusing on what the best-case potential solutions or outcomes could be,” she shares. “This will help you get everyone looking forward to a path of possible success.” How inspiring!

3. Don’t forget about compassion. Remember: It doesn’t matter *how* great you are at anything if you totally fail to treat people with respect and compassion. “You won’t succeed for long without learning how to work well with others,” Kincaid emphasizes. “Life requires us to do this on so many levels. To get ahead, succeed, and be heard, make personal connections with how you communicate. Take what’s happening to others to heart. Be a good listener, and you’ll open the door for good things.”

4. Invite discussion and collaboration. “When you have to deliver bad news or speak up, always invite collaboration! Never, ever walk away leaving something heavy in someone’s hands or heart,” Kincaid suggests. “Speak up, but ask questions too. People will have a way easier time moving forward when they feel like they have a safe space to share their thoughts and ideas.” We can totally get behind this beautiful advice.

5. It’s okay to be vulnerable! Being vulnerable is super scary, but sometimes it’s just what you’ve gotta do. Like a company CEO whose company crumbles or a lawyer who does their best to represent a client and loses, being truly vulnerable when sharing the worst will show how human you are AND resonate with your audience. “When appropriate, being vulnerable triggers engagement and likability,” Kincaid agrees. “Though we all can come off as defensive or try to distance ourselves from a problem or something uncomfortable, the ability to open up will set you apart. You’ll show people that you aren’t selfish, critical, or a know-it-all. You’ll demonstrate how much you care.”

Have you recently had to share something upsetting, or have you been on the receiving end? What helped soften the blow? Tell us on Twitter @BritandCo!

(Photos via Getty)

Gwyneth Paltrow's kids were destined to be in the spotlight the moment she announced the name "Apple." Unique name choices aside, we've watched Gwyneth's kids grow up over the past couple decades. Given all this time, I shouldn't be so surprised to find out these "little ones" are in college now, but WOW — I guess this means we're all officially old now.

Wondering what Apple and Moses are up to these days? Here's everything you need to know about them — including how Gwyneth's processing the "empty nest" life.

How many kids does Gwyneth Paltrow have?

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Gwyneth has two children — Apple and Moses Martin — with her ex-husband Chris Martin. She's been very vocal about them throughout the years, so it's totally bittersweet to see how fast they've grown.

How old are Gwyneth Paltrow's kids?

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Apple is currently 20 while Moses is — gulp! — 18 years old. I told you time flew by fast!

Why did Gwyneth name her daughter Apple?

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How gorgeous is Apple? She's the perfect blend of Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin, giving her a stunning visage that channels Tyra Banks' 'smize.' But many people have wondered why Gwyneth decided to name her Apple. In 2004, she sat down with Oprah Winfrey to dish about the inspiration behind her daughter's name, and we can't help but fully stan the meaning.

"When we were first pregnant, her daddy said, ‘If it’s a girl I think her name should be Apple.' It sounded so sweet, and it conjured such a lovely picture for me," she said. "Apples are so sweet and they're wholesome, and it's biblical."

Gwyneth went on to explain that even though the name sparked "international outrage," she'd actually heard of a few other Apples out in the world since then! Still, we know this Apple's been one-of-a-kind since day one. Gwyneth said, "The first morning we woke up together in the hospital bed, and we were facing each other, and I opened my eyes, and she's got these huge blue eyes...She was just staring at me with this unbelievable intensity."

Name aside, it's clear Apple Martin was destined to be unique!

How has Gwyneth Paltrow approached motherhood over the years?

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Last year, Gwyneth talked about what made her put acting on the back burner — and it was probably the realest thing she could've said as a mom. "Well, it's kind of ironic because I really stepped away from acting when Apple was born," she admitted to PEOPLE. "When I had her, it just, everything felt redefined for me, and I thought, 'I'm not sure that I want to do this so much as a career. I definitely don't want to...I'm not going to go away for months on end,'" she remembers thinking.

In 2021, the Goop founder also opened up about becoming a stepmom to her husband Brad Falchuk's two children — Isabella and Brody. Talking to actress Gabrielle Union — who's also been vocal about her own parenting journey — on The Goop Podcast, Gwyneth said, "When I became a stepmother, when I knew I was going to become a stepmother, I was like, 'S–t, I have no idea how to do this." However, she added that stepping into that role was an "interesting challenge" and that she's "learned so much" about herself.

Where do Gwyneth Paltrow's kids go to college?

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Apple has been at Vanderbilt University for the past two years (The Zoe Report). Located in Nashville, Tennessee, it's well over 2,000 miles away from where Gwyneth lives in California (via US Weekly). On the other hand, Moses goes to college at Brown University (via News Week) which is even further away — as in a little over 3,000 miles far.

As a first-time mom, I can only imagine how it feels to know the babies you've raised are so far away!

How does Gwyneth Paltrow feel about having an empty nest?

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Being a mom is a wild ride of emotions whether you're a celebrity like Gwyneth Paltrow or not. Gwyneth revealed her feelings about her kids no longer living at home during a Q&A session she had on her Instagram stories Tuesday. Someone asked, "How's life as a free bird?" according to PEOPLE, and it made Gwyneth reflect about her outlook. After she thanked the person for their question, she said, "It's very different. I have waves of grief and sadness."

From pregnancy to the newborn stage to the land of unruly teenagers, there's never a time where things like mom guilt cease to exist. But more often than not, moms have an overwhelming amount of love for their kids and experience a new pang of hurt when they leave home and leave an "empty nest". It's something Gwyneth Paltrow's finding herself dealing with now that her babies are now adults and don't live with her anymore.

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But it's not all doom and gloom! Now that Gwyneth Paltrow's kids are finding their way in the world as young adults, she's entering a season where she's learning more about herself. "I am kind of getting back in touch with this part of myself that I haven't felt like since I was in my 20s before I had kids," Gwyneth shared. "Like, a little more space and imagination, maybe. A little more inner space for what I might want to do that day, stuff like that. So, it's evolving. It's interesting."

How do you feel about Gwyneth Paltrow's comments about having an empty nest? Let us know on Facebook!

If I'm completely honest, there are very few celebrity couples I care about the way I care about Tom Holland and Zendaya. Aside from the fact this couple is like a walking friends-to-lovers plotline IRL, and are both power houses on their own, these two actors and philanthropists are just unstoppable together. They also keep their relationship pretty private. Here's the latest news on it.

The Latest News On Tom Holland And Zendaya's Relationship

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July 2016 — Tom Holland And Zendaya Join Spider-Man: Homecoming

Tom Holland and Zendaya met and became friends when they were cast in the MCU's Spider-Man: Homecoming. Tom had already made an appearance in Captain America: Civil War, but the new Spider-Man movie was a huge deal for both Marvel fans and the couple themselves! Not only did Tom Holland and Zendaya spend time together on set, but they also hung out at the pool together during their free timeand goofed around during San Diego Comic Con.

Image via Carlos Alvarez/Getty Images

November 2016 — Tom Holland And Zendaya Are On The Cover Of The Hollywood Reporter

Tom Holland and Zendaya basically broke the internet when they graced the cover of The Hollywood Reporter's Nov. 2016 issue. The shoot was filled with plenty of classic Hollywood throwbacks, but I have always *loved* the blue dress Z wears on the cover. "Over the moon with my first cover," Tom writes on Instagram. "So grateful that I got to share it with the one and only @zendaya. Thanks mate for helping me out."

"Honored to share it with the very best...Spider-Man himself @tomholland2013," Zendaya says in her post. "Thank you for this beautiful cover @THR."

Image via Kevin Winter/Getty Images

May 7, 2017 — Tom Holland And Zendaya Attend The MTV Movie And TV Awards

At the 2017 MTV Movie And TV Awards, Tom Holland and Zendaya premiered a clip from Spider-Man: Homecoming...and Tom did a flip onstage and then asked Zendaya to homecoming.

Image via Robert Marquardt/Getty Images for Sony Pictures

July 13, 2017 — Tom Holland And Zendaya Are Reportedly Dating

In July 2017, a source seemingly confirmed what many fans had been wondering for months: that Tom Holland and Zendaya had been dating. Considering the two other sets of Spider-Man leads (Tobey Maguire and Kirsten Dunst and Emma Stone and Andrew Garfield) both dated, it felt like this was one relationship that was bound to happen.

"They started seeing each other while they were filming Spider-Man," the insider tells People. "They've been super careful to keep it private and out of the public eye but they've gone on vacations with each other and try and spend as much time as possible with one another."

"They're both really ambitious and they challenge each other — but, most importantly, they make each other crack up," says another insider. "They seem to have a really similar sense of humor and love joking around together."

Tom Holland and Zendaya actually took to Twitter (now X) to tackle the rumors. "Wait wait...my favorite is when it says we go on vacations together HA! I haven't been on a vacation in years!" Zendaya says, to which Tomreplies, "Does the press tour count[?]"

Image via Frazer Harrison/Getty Images

August 8, 2017 — Zendaya Shuts Down Dating Rumors

"We are friends," Zendaya tells Variety. "He's a great dude. He's literally one of my best friends. This past how many months we've had to do press tours together. There's very few people that will understand what that's like at 20 years old."

Image via Noam Galai/Getty Images for New York Magazine

May 8, 2018 — Tom Holland Supports Zendaya's Iconic Met Gala Appearance

Zendaya showed up to the 2018 Met Gala (which had the theme Heavenly Bodies) as Joan of Arc, and it's quickly become one of her most iconic and recognizable carpet looks. Tom loved it just as much as we did and wrote on Instagram, "All hail the queen. Killing it mate."

Image via Theo Wargo/Getty Images

July 2019 — Tom Holland And Zendaya Have A Very Chaotic Press Tour For Spider-Man: Far From Home

For Spider-Man: Far From Home in 2019, Tom Holland, Zendaya, and Jacob Batalon did dozens of junkets together, and many of the interviews have gone viral — like Tom and Jacob finally meeting their favorite Watch Mojo hostandthe cast playing games with Jimmy Kimmel. Junkets are always fun to watch, and this one is no exception!

Image via Cindy Ord/Getty Images for SiriusXM

July 2, 2021 — Tom Holland And Zendaya Are Seen Kissing

After years of denying they were dating, Tom Holland and Zendaya really and truly broke the internet when pictures of them kissing in a car showed up on social media. This was such a vital moment that I remember exactly where I was when I found out.

"THEY ARE END GAME DREAM COUPLE," one X user tweeted. "I don't know if I want to be Tom Holland to kiss Zendaya or be Zendaya to kiss Tom Holland," another user joked.

Tom Holland and Zendaya were later seen attending a friend's wedding...and sitting very close to each other.

Image via Tom Holland/Instagram

September 1, 2021 — Tom Holland And Zendaya Make Their Relationship Instagram Official

On Zendaya's 25th birthday, Tom Holland posted the sweetest picture from the Spider-Man makeup trailer on Instagram. "My MJ, have the happiest of birthdays," he says in the caption. "Gimme a call when [you're] up xxx."

Image via Michael Loccisano/Getty Images

November 17, 2021 — Tom Holland And Zendaya Open Up About Their Relationship

In an interview with GQ, Tom Holland opened up about his relationship with Zendaya and how their relationship to fame has impacted everything. "One of the downsides of our fame is that privacy isn’t really in our control anymore, and a moment that you think is between two people that love each other very much is now a moment that is shared with the entire world,” he says of their July 2 kiss. “I’ve always been really adamant to keep my private life private, because I share so much of my life with the world anyway...We sort of felt robbed of our privacy.”

“It was quite strange and weird and confusing and invasive,” Zendaya agrees. “I think loving someone is a sacred thing and a special thing and something that you want to deal with and go through and experience and enjoy amongst the two people that love each other."

“Our relationship is something that we are incredibly protective of and we want to keep as sacred as possible," Tom later told The Hollywood Reporter. "We don’t think that we owe it to anyone, it’s our thing, and it has nothing to do with our careers.”

Image via Emma McIntyre/Getty Images

December 15, 2021 — Zendaya Posts A Tribute To Tom Holland As Spider-Man

Before Spider-Man: No Way Home hit theaters, Zendaya posted a pair of photos featuring Tom in his superhero costume on set, and in a costume as a kid. "My Spider-Man," the caption reads. "I’m so proud of you, some things never change and good thing♥️." Adorable!

Image via Aurelien Meunier/Getty Images

February 22, 2022 — Tom Holland Says He'd Love To Be In Euphoria

Zendaya shattered records when she became the youngest person to win the Emmy for Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series for Rue in Euphoria. Tom also made headlines related to Euphoria when he said he'd be interested in making a cameo in the series. "I would be in Euphoria. I think I would be a really good Maddy," he jokes during a BuzzFeed puppy interview. "I'm a big Euphoria fan. I love the show and I love season 2. I visited a lot while they were shooting it and I really, really enjoyed it...I would love to guest star or just be an extra in it. Or maybe I am and you just don't know."

Image via Momodu Mansaray/Getty Images

April 20, 2022 — Zendaya Talks About Tom Holland's Support During Euphoria

"I think it's great to have that support and love around you, because you need that," Zendaya tells Entertainment Tonightduring Euphoria's Emmy For Your Consideration event. "This isn't an easy job, so it's good to have that to free you up from it every now and then."

Images via Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images for TIME and Carlos Alvarez/Getty Images

June 1, 2022 — Zendaya Celebrates Tom Holland's Birthday

For Tom's 26th birthday, Zendaya posted a rare photo of her with Tom, captioning the post, "Happiest of birthdays to the one who makes me the happiest <3."

Image via Frazer Harrison/Getty Images

March 20, 2023 — Zendaya Wears A Ring With Tom Holland's Initials

I am always in favor of cute, meaningful, and minimalist jewelry, and apparently, Zendaya is too! When Zendaya's nail artist posted a video of the actress' new ballet pink manicure, fans quickly noticed the "TH" ring Z was wearing.

Image via Ethan Miller/Getty Images

April 27, 2023 — Tom Holland And Zendaya Go To An Usher Concert

2023 was the year of concerts for everyone, including celebrities! While Zendaya attended CinemaCon to promote Dune 2, she also went to an Usher concert with Tom Holland. "Childhood dreams come true, going to an @usher concert," Zendaya said on her Instagram story (via People).

Images via Frazer Harrison/Getty Images and Pascal Le Segretain/Getty Images

May 4, 2023 — Tom Holland And Zendaya Attend An NBA Game

Tom Holland and Zendaya had another date night in May, complete with the perfect athleisure, popcorn, and relaxed smiles.

Image via Xavi Torrent/Getty Images

January 12, 2024 — Tom Holland Confirms His Relationship With Zendaya Is Still Going Strong

After Zendaya unfollowed everyone on Instagram ahead of her new movie Challengers (Blake Lively pulled a similar move before her film A Simple Favor, as did Taylor Swift before Reputation), rumors started swirling that the pair had called it quits. When asked whether they had broken up, Tom says (via TMZ), "No, absolutely not."

Image via Frazer Harrison/Getty Images

January 14, 2024 — Tom Holland Says He Loves Watching Spider-Man: Homecoming With Zendaya

During the 2024 Critics Choice Awards, Tom Holland told Extra how much he loves rewatching his first Spider-Man movie, especially when he watches it with Z. "Zendaya and I will, every now and then, watch Spider-Man 1 and reminisce about being 19 and making those movies again," he says. "I love those movies, and I love savoring those moments, so I try not to watch them as often as I would maybe like to because it’s so special. It's such a luxury, such a gift to be able to sit down and sort of relive your youth.”

Image via Tom Holland/Instagram

January 23, 2024 — Tom Holland Shows Zendaya Some Love

Since Tom Holland and Zendaya are very private, they don't often post about their relationship on social media. But when Zendaya debuted a new look at Paris Fashion Week, Tom Holland couldn't help but post a pic of Z to his Instagram story with three heart-eye emojis. We share the same sentiment, Tom, what a coincidence!

Image via Joe Maher/Getty Images

February 15, 2023 — Tom Holland Supports Zendaya's Dune 2

The London premiere of Dune 2 was *very* eventful. Zendaya basically broke the internet by wearing a Mugler "Machinenmensch" robot suit (before changing into this chic black dress from Mugler by Casey Cadwallader), a certain actress spoiled her appearance in the movie by showing up to the carpet, and Tom Holland and Zendaya were spotted at the afterparty together. I love the care and attention Tom shows Zendaya (I, too, would be overwhelmed if I was surrounded by paparazzi like in this video of the couple), and I hope they got to unwind after a crazy night!

Image via Tom Holland/Instagram

February 21, 2024 — Tom Holland *Also* Supports Zendaya's Challengers

After the new trailer for Challengers dropped, Tom Holland shared it to his Instagram story, promising the movie looks just as good as we're hoping. "You ain't ready for this one!" he says alongside the trailer.

Image via Chung Sung-Jun/Getty Images

February 21, 2024 — Zendaya Says Tom Holland Has The Best "Rizz"

When asked who has the best "rizz" (short for charisma) in the Dune 2 cast, Zendaya immediately pivots and makes the answer more personal! "Everybody's kind of got their own [rizz]," she tells Buzzfeed. "I think someone who has beautiful charisma, not on the Dune cast, but...it works for me, is Mr. Tom Holland."

"I'm more shy and kind of quiet, so it takes a little bit more to pull me out of my shell but he's great at just talking to people and getting to know people," she continues. "He's just naturally very good at that. Or as for me, I've definitely had to pull it out of me a little bit. He's got that natural gift."

Image via Matthew Stockman/Getty Images

March 17, 2024 — Tom Holland And Zendaya Watch A Tennis Game

Ahead of Zendaya's spring movie Challengers (in which she plays a tennis pro-turned-coach opposite Mike Faist and Josh O'Connor), she watched the BNP Paribas Open Men's Final at Indian Wells Tennis Garden. Alongside Tom Holland and her assistant Darnell Appling, who she frequently calls her brother, Zendaya got comfy in a cream-colored tennis skirt, tank top, and zip-up hoodie ensemble. Spring really is here!! My favorite part of the afternoon is when Tom Holland and Zendaya sang along with Whitney Houston's "I Wanna Dance With Somebody."

Image via James Gourley/Getty Images

April 9, 2024 — Zendaya Raves About Tom Holland

In her Vogue cover story for May 2024, Zendaya talks a lot about how fame has affected both her life and Tom Holland's. “His [career] changed overnight. One day you’re a kid and you’re at the pub with your friends, and then the next day you’re Spider-Man,” she says. “I definitely watched his life kind of change in front of him. But he handled it really beautifully.”

That star power was evident in 2022, when Tom Holland and Zendaya spent the afternoon at the Louvre in Paris...and almost broke the internet. “You just kind of get used to the fact that, 'Oh, I’m also one of these art pieces you’re going to take a picture of. I just gotta be totally cool with it and just live my life,'" Zendaya continues. (She also says that when the museum let them walk around after-hours, "it was like Night at the Museum.”)

This spring, Zendaya can't wait to see Tom Holland in his London production of Romeo & Juliet: "[I] could not be more proud. I’m going to try to see as many shows as I possibly can.”

Image via Gareth Cattermole/Getty Images

April 10, 2024 — Challengers Premieres In London

Tom Holland showed up for the London premiere of Challengers, and got to support Zendaya in the sweetest way. In this video captured at the premiere, you can see Tom and Z share a hug and a kiss on the cheek during the evening. Even the smallest gesture can mean a lot during a busy night, and I love how in sync Tom Holland and Zendaya are!

The latest viral clip about Tom Holland and Zendaya also has to do with Challengers. During another Challengers press tour stop, Zendaya's overjoyed to be presented with a bouquet of gardenias. “These are my favorite flowers!” she exclaims. When asked if Tom Holland buys her flowers, she points at the camera and jokes, “I hope he's watching!”

While not every girlfriend necessarily wants a bouquet, every couple definitely has to figure out each other's love languages so they can get to know each other better — and apparently A-listers are the exact same!

Arnold Jerocki/Getty Images for LVMH x Vogue x NBC

August 31, 2024 — Zendaya And Tom Holland Match On A Day Date

After a summer starring in Romeo and Juliet, Tom Holland took a late-summer stroll with Zendaya in Calabasas, California. They also ended up wearing matching white tanks (Zendaya styled hers with trousers and ballet flats, while Tom opted for cargo-esque joggers and white sneakers) for the ultimate twinning moment.

Bero

October 15, 2024 — Tom Holland Launches A New Company With Unexpected Help From Zendaya

After going sober in 2022, Tom Holland announced on October 15 he was launching a non-alcoholic drink company called Bero. “When I got sober, I started exploring the world of non-alcoholic beers and realized there was space for me to fit in,” Tom says in an interview with Forbes. “My first year sober was really difficult, and had I had Bero, I think it would have been easier.”

“Zendaya hates beer, like, absolutely hates beer," he continues. And when she helped with the taste testing, a joke helped guide the overall brand. "She does not drink beer at all, and the first round of testing she was like, ‘Wow, these are really tasty’, and I was like, ‘Well, that's probably not a good sign.'"

And at the launch event for Bero in New York City, Tom and Zendaya wore matching shades of burgundy! Z stunned in a floor-length leather dress while Tom paired a short sleeve sweater with black trousers.

On

October 15, 2024 — Zendaya Reveals Why She'd Never Take A Dance Class With Tom Holland

While speaking to Teen Vogue for her partnership with On, Zendaya reveals she'd probably avoid dance classes with Tom Holland because "he's too good, it would piss me off," she jokes. "I would want to take someone who could be equally as bad as me."

"Kayaking, I would choose Tom because I think that, if I can remember correctly, with the kayak, you have to be in sync with the person," she continues. "And I think it would be hilarious because we are both very controlling and we both want to be in charge. So it would be funny to watch us be like, no, we're going to go this way. No, we're going to go that way. And I think it would be a good story after the fact."

Keep checking back here for the latest news on Tom Holland and Zendaya's relationship, and see what Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce are up to as well!

This post has been updated.

Blake Lively is as multifaceted as they come. She's an actress who has starred in titles like Gossip Girl, A Simple Favor, and The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants (plus It Ends With Us). She's the founder of Betty Buzz, which has a variety of non-alcoholic mixers that taste just as good on their own as they do with liquor. And, she's also a mom. Lively has been outspoken about protecting her children from the paparazzi, making rare public appearances with them for events like her husband Ryan Reynolds' Hollywood Walk Of Fame Ceremonyandcozy date nights.

When Lively and Reynolds seemingly announced the birth of their fourth child last year, we melted. Here's everything you need to know about Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively's kids.

How do Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively prioritize their kids?

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At the end of September, Ryan Reynolds revealed how different parenting seems to be now than when he was a kid. "Parents today are so different. We're so soft," he said at HubSpot’s INBOUND tech conference (via People). "I don't yell. I grew up with like — it was nuts, it was an improvised militia.”

“Now it's like, I can go look at all my resources for parenting and remind myself how to be perfectly compassionate,” he continued. "Something I love about [conflict resolution], and I know this is not very fancy, but what I love about it is that you can meet somebody where they are, and you don't have to be right or wrong...You can disagree and still connect."

Blake Lively recently joined an episode of her Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants' costar Amber Tamblyn's Further Adoand revealed the one unbreakable rule she made with Ryan Reynolds.

“When Ryan and I got together, we made a rule not to work at the same time,” she says. “So that we could always prioritize our personal life...That takes working really hard when we're not. Just like financial planning and sustaining that; it takes balance.”

I love that Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds are serious about their family life, and that they have identified what works for them and are sticking with it.

What is the name of Blake Lively's 4th baby?

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Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds' fourth baby is named Olin, which he revealed during the July 22 premiere of Deadpool & Wolverine!

Before Ryan chose to reveal the name, he appeared on the Today show and made a cheeky joke about it after the hosts urged him to spill the beans. He said, "We always wait for Taylor to tell us what the child's name will be. We'll say this: we're still waiting."

What gender is Ryan and Blake's fourth child?

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On July 26, Ryan Reynolds confirmed that he and Blake Lively's fourth baby, born in February 2023, is a boy in an Instagram video supporting mental health charity Walking 4 Hope. Speaking with founder John Bell, who struggled with suicidal ideation after the 2020 loss of his son Jake, Reynolds says, “I want to share with you that I, too, have a son...Boy, John, if I love him one-tenth as much as you love Jake, I’ll feel like I’ve done a pretty d—mn good job.”

Considering how adorable James, Inez, and Betty are, I can only imagine how cute Blake Lively's son is!

How many children do Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds have?

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Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively have four kids. They welcomed their third daughter in 2019, making this new addition to the family their fourth child.

What are Blake Lively kids ages?

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Blake Lively's kids are all under 10. James is 9 (turning 10 on December 16), Inez is 7 (turning 8 on September 30), Betty is 4 (turning 5 on October 4), and Olin turned 1 in February.

Did Blake Lively have a 4th baby?

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Blake Lively posted a pic on Super Bowl Sunday in 2023 showing what appears to be a post-baby body with the caption "Been busy."

Lively confirmed her fourth pregnancy in September 2022 when she arrived at her Forbes event in NYC cradling a baby bump and by posting her own personal photos on Instagramhoping that "the 11 guys waiting outside [her] home for a 🦄 sighting will leave [her] alone."

How old was Blake Lively when she had her first child?

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Blake Lively was 27 when she gave birth to her first daughter, James, in December of 2014.

Why did Blake Lively name her daughter James?

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The couple decided to name their daughter James after Reynolds' late father. While the name connects both James and Reynolds to his father, it also gives Lively the chance to bond with her daughter over having historically male names. "I liked having a boy's name," Lively said on Good Morning Americain 2015. "I thought I'd pass it on."

Their third daughter Betty's name is a tribute to Lively's late father. We didn't know the name of the couple's third baby until Taylor Swift used all three names in her 2020 album folklore. Swift also used James' voice at the beginning of her 2017 track "Gorgeous"! Does that mean we'll hear one of Ryan Reynolds' children in Reputation (Taylor's Version)? I hope so!

What has Ryan Reynolds said about raising their kids?

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In a conversation with Hugh Jackman ahead of Deadpool & Wolverine, Ryan Reynolds opened up about how his family has helped his anxiety. "I think it makes it better because your focus is less on yourself and more on your kids," he says (via People). "I love that I've had anxiety because when I see my kids experiencing some of that, which is probably genetic, I know how to address it in a way that is compassionate, that actually allows them to feel seen. I know that I can't just fix it. And I can communicate all that stuff to them and with them. I'm always grateful for it."

Per People, Ryan Reynolds has also made it clear he and Blake are wholly invested in the kids' daily lives. The doting husband and father enjoys the moments of "walking them to school and walking them back" as it deepens their bond. More than anything, Ryan and Blake's main goal is to make sure they teach their kids how to be introspective with Ryan saying "the thing we sort of hang our hat on the most is self-awareness with our kids."

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However, that doesn't mean Blake and Ryan don't absolutely love being parents. "We're very excited [and] we wouldn't do this four times if we didn't love it," he says in an interview with CNBC's Power Lunch. "Everybody's doing great. Everybody's actually doing fantastic. I think if we hadn't figured it out by now, I think we'd be in deep, deep trouble."

"It's a zoo over here," he jokes. "This is my office here, this is where I'll probably — to be honest, I'll probably spend the rest of my life in here."

We love how much energy Ryan and Blake are pouring into their kids. It's always beautiful when parents are able to be present with their kids and teach them how to be present with themselves. Ryan Reynolds has also mentioned how having daughters "has been such a ride." Since he comes from a family of all boys, having daughters is something that was beyond his wildest dreams! “I love being a girl dad,” Ryan tells Access in 2020. “I have three daughters, which I never in a million years would imagine.”

He mentioned his newest child in June of 2023, when he announced his new series Bedtime Stories. "The idea for a show made to help everyone fall asleep was born the same day as my fourth child," he says on Instagram.

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The Deadpool actor also recently offered some parenting advice on Amanda Hirsch’s hit podcastNot Skinny But Not Fat. "Embrace the chaos,” he tells Hirsch. "[Blake] always says, ‘They're all under our roof right now. The whole family's under our roof right now. We have them all.’ And that is a fleeting thing. Not an infinite resource, you know?”

While Reynolds understands firsthand how overwhelming parenting can feel, he also doesn't wish away this time with four young kids: “Just say, ‘Think about what you would give in 40 years or 30 years to come back and enjoy this one moment.’"

How has motherhood affected Blake Lively?

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Blake Lively opened up about how Ryan Reynolds and she monitor screen safety for their kids, which is definitely something top-of-mind in 2024. “This is not an ad. I get nothing out of this. I just love @tappityapp,” she said of the STEM-focused educational app. “It’s engaging, informative, fun and they care about safety."

She also jokes that she's learning new things right along with her kids! But, no matter how educational or fun an app is, Blake Lively also emphasizes the importance of engaging with her kids' devices: "I’m always triple checking any kids app constantly for safety because that’s my responsibility not an app’s, but I do LOVE this one.”

Despite its fun and funny moments, the actress has admitted being a mom is hard, but she did it with her signature dry sense of humor. “BettyBooze at your service," she wrote in an Instagram Story announcing the new brand. "These are recipes I’ve been making for loved ones for years. But I have 4 kids now. And I’m tired. So here they are. In a can."

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However, Blake Lively absolutely loves motherhood, and says in a 2022 interview with Forbes that having children has made her feel more comfortable in her own skin. "Once I had children, that just became even more profound because my time was even more precious, but also I think having children for me made me feel so much more in my skin," she says. "I never felt more myself or at ease in my own body or more confident — not to say that there aren't a bevy of insecurities coming at me a million times a day, but I just feel incredibly settled."

Speaking with People in 2021, Lively also explains how important it is that her children see her accomplish things outside the home. "I want to be as present of a mother as humanly possible and I want them to feel my presence, but I also think the best way to be the best mother is to show them that you can have a life and have a passion and have an identity outside of just being a mother," Lively says.

While she acknowledges that motherhood is all-encompassing, and it looks different for everyone, she knows that having your own identity is very important. "Teaching them that they can maintain themselves and that everything is possible [is crucial]," she adds.

When did Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds have their daughters?

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Blake Lively's children were all born in the last 10 years. Blake Lively's daughters are James, Inez, Betty, and her fourth child is named Olin! Their fourth baby's name was announced during the premiere of Deadpool & Wolverine. Blake gave birth to James in 2014, while Inez was born in 2016. Lively gave birth to Betty in 2019 and Olin in February of 2023.

Is Taylor Swift friends with Blake Lively's kids?

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Yes, Taylor Swift loves Blake Lively's kids! At the Philadelphia show of the Eras Tour, in which Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively attended, Taylor said hello from the stage.

One funny detail about Ryan Reynolds' kids that I love is when he mentioned the girls finally realized Taylor Swift was a popstar. "I think what's most exciting for them is that for the longest time they just thought Taylor's just like an aunt, like a friend of Mommy and Daddy that's very, very close, almost family," he tellsThe Jess Cagle Show. "And then they went to a concert one day and were like, 'Ohhhhh, this isn't a hobby.'"

For Super Bowl Sunday in 2024, Blake Lively joined Taylor Swift to support beau (and KC Chiefs tight end) Travis Kelce. "Last week I left my kids for the first time ever," she says on Instagram. "I took pictures upside down and had no clue. I treated a friendship bracelet like a Flat Stanley for my husband like I didn’t realize it wasn’t ‘07. I borrowed more jewelry than the skeleton in the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. And I went clubbing. Now I know what my episode of TheTwilight Zone would look like."

Do Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively's kids have nannies?

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Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds' children don't have a nanny. "I feel like I could sometimes have a bit of a short fuse, but there's just been this weirdly endless supply of patience," Ryan told GQ in 2015. "I have no problem waking up five times in the middle of the night and changing diapers, and as exhausted as you get, I have this stupid grin on my face all the time."

Check out our email newsletter for the latest celebrity news and trending content, and check back here for the latest news on Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively's kids!

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This story has been updated.

Move over expensive MAC haul — I've discovered the best drugstore lipstick that rivals my $20+ purchases. I love finding dupes for my beauty lovers who can't continuously drop a huge amount of money on new products that eventually expire. Since I'm 100% against using old makeup, I'd rather chat your eat off about the affordable drugstore finds I'm using consistently these days.

IMO, the best drugstore lipstick is the Maybelline Super Stay Matte Ink Lipstick! Coming from one of the OG beauty brands, it's formula was surprising because I almost expected it to fail. It sounds silly, but trying drugstore brands used to be a hit or miss before social media started demanding that all makeup products stop being subpar.

Since this lipstick passed the test, here's everything you need to know about it — including why I l keep buying it and all the other best drugstore lipsticks I love!

What is Maybelline Superstay Matte Ink used for?

Jasmine Williams

Anyone can say that their lipstick is THE BEST, but that's not always true. So, what's the tea on the Super Stay Matte Ink formula? According to the brand's notes on Amazon, here's what you can expect to this lipstick to do:

  • Glide on easily because of the "unique arrow application"
  • Provide a "perfectly matte" finish
  • Remain "smudge-free" for up to "16 hours"

It sounds like a lot of fluff if you've never tried the formula before, so I scrolled through the comment section to see what other customers think.

What are other customers saying about it?

Maybelline

Most of the customer reviews I read through on Amazon are extremely thorough so here are the ones that stood out the most:

  • "I am really hooked on this lipstick! It's very long wearing and it's super gentle on my lips...Let me address some common complaints among other reviewers and why I think they're wrong...Oil takes this stuff off quite easily, so do some makeup wipes...Secondly, I do agree that this product is very sticky. I have found that I can put my Mac lipgloss on over top and now it's not sticky anymore!"
  • "I’ve purchased this longevity wand type lipstick a few times and I like the texture and staying power. Sometimes I put another glossy lipstick over if it seems drying however it stays very nicely for the day."
  • "This is my first time purchasing this brand. When I say it last all day, it doesn't come off until you take it off! Some might see this as bothersome, but having it stay on until I need it off is the greatest thing."
  • My Favorite Review: "I put it on at around 3:30 pm and fell asleep with it on cause it was a busy night, it was still on the next morning. I had to use multiple makeup remover wipes and wash my face with a good makeup remover to get it off."

My Review For Maybelline Superstay Matte Ink Lipstick

Jasmine Williams

I used to be terrified of wearing 'nude' lip colors because I thought they would be too much of a contrast against my complexion, but watching a few YouTube tutorials nipped my fear in the bud. I make the 'Seductress' shade work for me by lining my lips with a dark brown liner. Once I did that, I immediately fell for the way it looks on me. It's to the point where I actually can't stop wearing lip combo — it's so easy to apply and takes less than two minutes to set!

How long does Maybelline Superstay Matte Ink Lipstick last?

Before I started applying gloss over my nude lip combo, I wanted to test two very important things:

  1. If this matte lipstick could pass the smudge-proof test. I've tried other brands, and they haven't always stayed in place — especially when eating or drinking something — so I was skeptical.
  2. How long it actually lasts, smudge-proof or not. I mean, who among us hasn't gotten home after an evening out to find their lipstick basically nonexistent?

Like one of the customer reviews suggests, this lipstick has come off a little while eating things like pasta or pizza, so it's not 100% "smudge-free." Given that, I only had to reapply this lipstick once throughout an 8-hour day — which isn't a huge deal to me because it takes less than 30 seconds to reapply it. The best way I get it to stay put is by applying lip gloss and a teeny amount of setting spray over it.

Target

Maybelline Super Stay Matte Ink Lipstick

Lately, I've even been adding the Maybelline Lifter Gloss in the shade 'Stone' as a way to truly lock in the color. It highlights the 'Seductress' shade of the Maybelline Super Stay Matte Ink Lipstick which is a huge plus for me.

For less than $12, I think it's absolutely worth buying multiple times!

More Best Drugstore Lipsticks

Target

The Lip Bar Vegan Matte Liquid Lipstick

When I'm in the mood for a universal red lipstick that has the best color payoff, I always turn to The Lip Bar's 'Bawse Lady.' She's a gorgeous blue-red that highlights all undertones without making anyone looked washed out.

Target

Revlon Colorstay Limitless Matte Lipstick

I discovered Revlon's Colorstay formula while browsing for a deeper lipstick for fall and it does not disappoint! It's another vegan product that has triple hyaluronic acid and upcycled cranberry extract in it so it literally feels like you're not wearing anything on your lips!

Target

Milani Color Fetish Matte Lipstick

The word 'Fetish' may be off-putting, but don't write this lipstick off because of the name — ha! I typically wear this when I don't want to wait for a liquid lipstick to dry. It's super velvety and also contains hyaluronic acid in it to help keep lips moisturized.

Target

Nyx Professional Makeup Smooth Whip Matte Lip Cream

Last but not least, Nyx has never let me down in the lip department before. If I'm truly shopping on a budget, I'll reach for the Smooth Whip Matte Lip Cream because it glides on my lips like butter. That's not to say I know what it feels like to rub butter all over my lips, but you get what I mean! It's soft and has a gorgeous color payoff that makes me feel like it's comparable to the best lipstick I swear by.

Have you tried Maybelline's Super Stay Matte Ink lipstick before? Let us know in the comments and subscribe to our newsletter for more beauty finds!

Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

Dudes — do you own a flannel? Well, we're pretty sure that you do, so behold SIX different ideas for easy costumes for men using that one shirt! You're welcome. Even if you have a different Halloween party every day of the week, you'll have different costumes you can wear to each one. Not only are they made with things you already own, but they're also pretty comfortable if we do say so ourselves.

To make these epic Halloween costumes, we picked up this basic red flannel from our local thrift store for $5 and paired it with a bunch of basic clothes most men already have. Scroll on to see how we made these super easy (last-minute even!) halloween costumes!

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Thanks to Zane for rocking all of these looks!

The Brawny Man Halloween Costume

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Men, get those muscles and those pearly whites ready for this flannel shirt costume! In our eyes, the Brawny Man has everything we're looking for. He’s got that tough muscle bod to swoop us off our feet, the square jaw line to melt our hearts and the perfect dark hair that we just can’t wait to run our fingers through.

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First, shop the (hilarious) Muscle Shirt. Think of it like a push-up bra for your entire torso. Cut off the lower arm section of the muscle suit so you can roll up the flannel sleeves and get down to business. Don't forget to grab a pack of Brawny paper towels to complete the costume!

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Don't panic if you start saying things like, “Oh gosh, is that some dirt over there on your vanity mirror? Girl, I’ve got you. Let me fix that.”

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We're giving this two thumbs' up because it's such an easy costume for men!

Al Borland Halloween Costume

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Remember this 90s sidekick from Home Improvement? Go as him or just any tool-belt-loving fella ;).

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This is a super easy costume for men because if you're a workman, you probably already have the flannel, boot cut jeans, and work boots! The key to getting this look right, however, is all about the accessories. We purchased this basic tool belt from Amazon. Fill it with your tools (or a flask) to really get you in the Halloween spirit.

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We all hate measuring to hang up your favorite framed pieces of wall art. Don’t worry, Al is here to save the day!

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If you don't want to commit to a full bushel of a beard, we understand. We picked up this fake beard and find the look quite comical. You can trim it to get a look that you like best.

Larry The Cable Guy Halloween Costume

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“I'm happier than a tornado in a trailer park!" There's nothing better than a man who can make you laugh. Larry the Cable Guy has a particular kind of humor, but the one thing we can always count on him for is his sleeveless flannel shirts. I guess he must always be running warm.

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Get ready to release some anger, because you’ll need to rip off the sleeves for this look. (Meaning that if you're planning on using all of these costumes, you might want to save this one for last). Pair your sleeveless flannel with boot cut jeans, boots and a trucker-inspired baseball cap.

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This look says, “My cooking is probably subpar, but I can make you laugh while we try to cook together.” ;)

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Larry's signature look is his goatee-mustache combo. We weren't going to subject Zane to actually shaving for this costume, so instead we created the look with a fake goatee stick-on beard and a brown eyebrow pencil. Easy as pie.

The Hipster Halloween Costume

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Does your beer brewing side hobby need your constant attention?

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Zane completely dressed for this costume himself from his own wardrobe. Pair your flannel with a V-neck tee, cuffed slim-fitting jeans and your best pair of leather loafers. Accessories are a must — think thick-rimmed glasses, beanie hat and a cold beer. PBR or Tecate will do the trick, since you are already in the process of creating the perfect beer yourself ;)

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Need man bun styling tips? Or man braids if your hair is long enough.

Marty McFly Halloween Costume

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Okay, real talk – can you believe the year Marty traveled to in his time machine was 2015? How time flies (even if the cars don't).

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Marty’s iconic look is all about the layers, so be sure to add a jean jacket and that signature puffy vest over the flannel. Pair with boot cut jeans and the whitest pair of 90’s (dad) sneakers you own.

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Zach let us borrow his board but you can find an inexpensive skateboard on Amazon too.

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Keep the hair simple. We went for a side part and wind-blown vibes — traveling through time is windy, right?

Wind-blown Man Costume

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We’ve all had those bad umbrella days…All jokes aside, this look was our absolute favorite to create. We are just dying over the fact that no wind or fan was used in creating this photo.

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We had Zane dress in a normal everyday outfit, then added some wind-blown tweaks. You will want to stick wire down the inside of your tie to give it a rippled shape and then safety pin it to corner of the flannel. We also pinned up the bottom corner of the shirt and taped on some wind-blown newspaper ads to the knee of the pants. Most importantly, you’ll want a broken, inside-out umbrella to complete this costume.

And that's a wrap!

How do you feel about these flannel costumes? Let us know in the comments, and don't forget to tag us in all your flannel costumes on Instagram!

How do you feel about these flannel costumes? Let us know in the comments, and don't forget to tag us in all your flannel costumes on Instagram!

Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

This post has been updated.