This Is the Superficial Thing Everyone at the Gym Is Judging You For

Why Your Flexibility Stalls

As though going through puberty weren’t enough of a struggle, it’s also the time when you start to lose your natural flexibility. “No one is more flexible in their life than they are as a child,” says Dr. Leython Williams, a doctor of physical therapy at Athletico Physical Therapy. “However, during puberty, children often become temporarily less flexible. Some children have slow growth spurts, while others grow very quickly. This temporary decrease in muscle length/flexibility is a result of their bones growing faster than their muscles and tendons can stretch.”

Note that Dr. Williams refers to this particular loss of flexibility as temporary — meaning we can’t blame puberty for the fact our toes seem to be getting farther away every time we try to touch them.

“There is no specific age when we wake up and our flexibility has ‘officially declined.’ However, it is a fact that as we age our flexibility decreases, which leads to decreased functional ability and mobility,” he explains. “As our bodies get older, we lose a small amount of flexibility as a result of the normal aging processes. There is loss of water in our tissues and intervertebral discs, increased stiffness in our joints, and a loss of elasticity in muscles and tendons. In our 20s and 30s, it is important that we develop a consistent static and dynamic stretching regimen to establish and maintain flexibility and range of motion more easily into our older years.”

That’s right: What you do now matters later. And this isn’t just about keeping up in yoga, Dr. Williams cautions. “It becomes imperative that we stretch regularly to decrease our likelihood of various injuries.” Jill Belland, co-founder of Barre Belle, agrees. “It’s easy to feel invincible if you’re young and injury free! Flexibility will reduce your risk of injury: What doesn’t bend will break. Increased range of motion, balance, and mobility are all linked to flexibility and contribute to overall strength and fitness.”

How to Get It Back

When you’re a kid, flexibility comes naturally; when you’re an adult, you have to take responsibility for improving and maintaining it. “Peak flexibility age for adults can differ person to person and depends largely on their physical activity habits,” says Dr. Rachelle Reed, PhD, Pure Barre’s manager of training development and barre kinesiologist. “Notably, flexibility can be improved at any age when flexibility training is incorporated into a regular exercise routine. It’s important for adults to be strategic about including flexibility training into their workouts, because maintaining flexibility and physical function as we move into middle and older adulthood is associated with better quality of life and independent living.”

There’s no one flexibility standard everyone has to meet, Belland reassures: “There is no golden rule for what perfect flexibility is person to person, but there are simple markers such as touching your toes from a forward fold for hamstrings/lower back, or reaching for your hands behind your back, with one hand behind the head and the other behind the waist, for shoulder mobility. You don’t need to be a contortionist; moving around with fluidity in your everyday life and having good range of motion in your favorite activities without feeling pain or tension is a better way to gauge your own personal goals.”

But where do you start if you want to improve your flexibility? Dr. Reed explains, “There are two main types of flexibility training that you should aim to incorporate into your routine: Dynamic stretching, where a stretch is performed by moving through a challenging but attainable range of motion several times in a row, and static stretching, where a stretch is held in a challenging but attainable position for a longer period of time (at least 10-30 seconds).”

How do you know how far to go? “Our muscles have a natural stretch reflex that prevents us from going too far into a stretch, which can also cause injury,” Belland tells us. “Aim to gently stretch through this reflex. The key to increasing flexibility is about time under tension: It takes around 20 seconds to ease through the stretch reflex. Reintroduce the stretch and hold it for 10 seconds longer, working up to one minute. The second time you introduce a stretch, the stretch reflex will diminish, allowing your body to get deeper into your stretch and also building better muscle memory.”

If you’re still worried about injuring yourself — especially if you’ve been injured in the past — Dr. Williams recommends seeing a physical therapist for guided stretches. Belland reminds us that you don’t have to go to the gym or spend hours on stretching. “Stretch a little bit every day when you can fit it in after a workout or in front of the TV. If you just don’t think you’ll stretch on your own, getting to a yoga or a barre class is helpful if you need the accountability of a dedicated time and space.”

Speaking of the gym, just as your phys ed teacher told you, stretching is especially important before and after a workout. “Far too often active individuals begin their workouts without a dynamic stretch,” Dr. Williams says. “Dynamic stretching increases one’s range of movement and blood flow to soft tissues prior to physical exertion and/or sport performance. This type of stretching is vital in improving performance and reducing the risk for injury.”

But you don’t have to be an athlete to benefit — in fact, stretching is an important antidote to all that sitting those of us with desk-based jobs tend to do. “Sitting at your desk all day can lead to decreased flexibility in hip flexors and hamstrings by keeping them in a shortened position for a prolonged period of time,” Dr. Williams warns. “Consider a standing desk or work station or taking several breaks throughout your work day to stand up and stretch.”

Wellness is an umbrella term — it looks and feels different to each individual person. Despite the fact that I just named five exercises I attempt to partake in weekly — life gets busy! — I really try to branch out of my usual workouts, due to both the need for a challenge and a general interest in looking for new ways to move my body. What are my most recent exercise acquisitions? Breakdancing, hot yoga, and, well, getting TORCH’D. Goop booked us with celebrity trainer, Isaac Boots, to add the last workout to that list.

Boots has a long roster of celeb clients: Vanessa Hudgens, Kelly Ripa, Jessica Chastain, Gwenyth Paltrow (of course!) and more. I’ve always been a bit envious of how the celebrities of today are able to build at-home gyms and call for private sessions in a flash. Yet, beyond the affordability aspect, I’ve been more curious on how they become so fit — diet and personal chefs aside — with such busy schedules.

I found out in the Bahamas. And the workout is not as easy as it looks.

Boots first created virtual at-home sessions to teach TORCH’D classes during the pandemic, with the main premise of the workout focusing on the flow of body resistance, dance conditioning, and targeted repetition with the intention of burning fat. We — the other gal pal journalists and influencers on the trip — were set to complete two morning classes, both Saturday and Sunday. I, unfortunately, missed my connecting flight on Friday and wasn’t able to make it to the Saturday class due to a series of unfortunate travel events (let’s not rehash it, for my sake). But, after talking to the girls who were able to attend that morning session, it seems that the only thing I missed was waking up really sore on Sunday. My quads thanked me for that missed flight.

Group fitness is also something I’ve gotten used to over the years, especially when moving to LA where it's common practice, but going into workouts that I’ve never done before is intimidating. Exercising in front of others, especially when you aren’t familiar with the form of exercise, can be a particularly vulnerable activity.

Therefore, before attending the 45-minute TORCH’D session, I searched for the workouts online to study them a little. I’ll admit, I didn’t think they looked that difficult. But boy, was I absolutely proved wrong. Keep in mind that the Sunday session was outdoors, and although on a shaded rooftop with a stunning ocean view, the Bahamas was in the middle of a heat wave. I already didn’t stand a chance against my already innately sweaty and red-faced self during any form of physical movement.

Boots started the music — an upbeat, EDM like tune — to get us moving to the rhythm.

We began with small movements like arm circles and donkey kicks, pulsed for a bit, and then went ‘double time’ (AKA we picked up our speed). Those rotations would continue throughout the workout. It was during the pulsing portions of the workout where I really felt it target my biceps, triceps, and glutes. A burning sensation formed in my upper arms and legs several times, making it hard to keep going. There were a few instances when I had to take a quick break to get back into it. It was during those breaks when I noticed I wasn’t the only one taking a breather.

As I’ve grown sick of my mundane daily gym routine, I’ve noticed that having fun while I workout is a priority. Boots’ liveliness and charisma matched with his eagerness to teach really helped me get out of my own head (I have the tendency to become frustrated and want to quit during certain moves.)

I now understand now how a lot of celeb women — like Gwenyth — exercise with time constraints. Workouts like Torch'd are simple and tough, but effective at toning all the right places. While I would 10/10 recommend this class to anyone, I (and my sore muscles) definitely encourage you to take a rest day (or two) afterwards. 😉

Did Josh Allen get engaged to Hailee Steinfeld?

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Yes, Josh Allen & Hailee Steinfeld are engaged! The couple made a joint post to Instagram to celebrate, and Josh captioned the photo, "♾️ 11•22•24 ♾️." The Summer I Turned Pretty's Conrad and Belly have nothin' on Hailee Steinfeld & Josh Allen's eternal love! ;)

"The biggest congratulations ❤️," Hailee's Pitch Perfect costar Rebel Wilson commented. Chad Micheal Murray was also excited for the couple, commenting, "Congrats brother!"

Is Hailee Steinfeld in a relationship in 2024?

Yes, Hailee Steinfeld has been with Josh Allen since the summer of 2023. When they were first linked, a source told People that "it's new, but they are having fun."

And that fun clearly turned into something much more! Josh went Instagram official in October of 2024 (with photos from a Paris trip Hailee posted in April), and the comments flooded with fans and friends showering the couple in love. "Babe wake up, Joshy just hard launched Hailee," one user said, while another added, "thank you for making Hailee happy!! 🫶🏼🫶🏼."

In the October 18 edition of her Beau Society newsletter, Hailee joked that after she and Josh gifted each other the Miyabi Kaizen chef's knife last Christmas, "he told me there's an old wive's tale that if you gift your significant other a knife you have to pay for it, otherwise it signifies the severing of a relationship. So we exchanged quarters so we didn't have that bad omen." This just proves how well they know each other!

Are Taylor Swift and Hailee Steinfeld still friends?

Yes, Taylor Swift and Hailee Steinfeld are still friends. 9 years after Hailee starred in Taylor Swift's "Bad Blood" music video, Taylor liked Hailee and Josh's Instagram post (which she doesn't do often), and her BF Travis Kelce commented, "Congratulations!!! 🙌🏻🙌🏻👏🏻👏🏻."

When is Hailee Steinfeld getting married?

The couple hasn't told us their wedding date yet, but stay tuned for news on the big day — and wedding photos!