How To Plan A Sustainable Baby Gender Reveal With Main Character Energy

sustainable gender reveal party ideas for 2023

Baby gender reveals are some of the best occasions around for a few simple reasons. They bring friends and family together, they celebrate new life, and they usually feature tons of color. These parties allow expecting parents to celebrate their upcoming addition to the family and officially kick off whatever prep and baby name planning they might have held off on. (Although, if we're honest, we've had our baby names picked out for years...) But as fun as these celebrations can can be, we've seen how gender reveals can have disastrous consequenceson the world around us.

If you're considering your own reveal, there are a variety of details (both in terms of theme and safety) to take into consideration. Whether you're one for grand announcements, or you make a subtle nod that Blake Lively would be proud of, these memorable options will make you feel like the main character and keep Mother Earth in mind, too.

Baby Gender Reveal Ideas For 2023

Image via Akshay Bineesh/Pexels

Make Individual Reveal Cakes

Got a serious sweet tooth? If there's one thing that makes us feel like a main character, it's baking. Make a batch of your go-to vanilla cupcakes for your guests. Your confidante (which is how we'll refer to the person who knows the gender of the baby if the parents don't want to know yet) can either add food coloring to the batter or can pipe colored icing into the center of the plain cupcakes. (via B+C)

www.tiktok.com

The moment of a lifetime - November ‘22💘 #rainbowbaby #genderreveal #itsagirl

Flower Shower

Not only is an umbrella the perfect prop for an "April Showers" spring theme, but the flower petals offer a romantic and intimate detail that we are totally in love with. Add a few balloons and props to make it a moment to remember.

Why It's Sustainable

There are two reasons that this can be an eco-friendly gender reveal idea. Real flower petals can be discarded in a way that allows them to break down naturally. If you'd rather choose silk petals, they can double decor once you're done with the actual reveal.

What Will Baby Bee?

Yellow and green are classic gender-neutral colors for both reveals and nurseries. If you want to keep things neutral ahead of the reveal (or you're not a fan of blue or pink), these cookies are sweet as honey.

Bouncing Balloon

Now you finally have a use for that old cardboard box in the garage. Have your confidante fill the box with colorful balloons before wrapping the gift in themed paper. The most important detail here will be that they tape the balloons to the top of the box! That way, when you open the box, they won't float away. (via B+C)

Why It's Sustainable

Taping the balloons to the lid of the box means that you won't lose them and that you'll be able to dispose of them properly. You can opt for biodegradable balloons, too!

Water Guns + Food Coloring

Nothing makes a statement like covering a white background — and a bunch of white clothes — in colorful dye! All you need for this idea are some water guns from the toy aisle and food coloring. Experiment with a few different water to coloring ratios until you find the one that works the best.

Why It's Sustainable

Fill your water guns with natural food coloring that are allergy-friendly and vegan. Plus, once your party is over, you can gift your water guns to nieces, nephews, and friends — or keep them for yourselves.

Back To The '90s

If you love all of these throwback trends as much as we do, don't pass up the opportunity to throw a '90s party. Make cassette tape cookies that are on-theme or surprise everyone with colorful scrunchies that add to the reveal. (via B+C)

www.instagram.com

Jonathan Vandercook on Instagram: "It’s a boy, gender reveal party 💙💙💙 The love and excitement when the balloon popped was such a beautiful moment and a privilege to be a part of. Congratulations to Mom & Dad! . . . . #baby #genderreveal #genderrevealparty #itsaboy #babyboy #genderrevealideas #balloon #newborn #newparents #babygram"

It's Raining Confetti

Nothing screams party like confetti in our humble opinion, so what better choice for a gender reveal celebration! If you don't want to work with confetti cannons, have a few friends throw handfuls of confetti into the air at the same time.

How To Make It Sustainable

Instead of buying regular confetti, grab enough biodegradable confetti for the whole party. That way everyone can use as much as they want and you don't have to worry about whether you've gotten every single piece off of the ground during cleanup.

Bake It

This pastel confetti cake has multiple colors, but you can make it gender reveal-ready by having your confidante choose colors to reflect the surprise. Feel free to keep the confetti icing multicolored. (via B+C)

www.tiktok.com

Star Wars Gender Reveal for my aunt and her husband 💙💗💙💗 ITS A…….. #fyp #babyfever #genderreveal

The Force Is Strong With This One

Lucasfilm fans will get a kick out of using lightsabers instead of confetti or glitter. Make some Star Wars desserts to round out the party, or go all out with Princess Leia-inspired hair.

Why It's Sustainable

Lightsabers are a great collector's item, so this is one gender reveal prop that can stay in the family for years to come.

Gender Reveal Party Alternatives

Not feeling a gender reveal party? Here are some alternatives to try instead — if you even want to announce it at all. There's no pressure to throw a big party if you'd rather keep the celebration within the family. The most important thing is that you and your partner feel comfortable and are able to welcome your baby in the way that you want. Congratulations!

Our Favorite Alternatives:

  • Sending a video (or picture) of a private reveal
  • Posting your pregnancy + gender announcement together
  • Have an intimate dinner party
  • Host a scavenger hunt

Follow us Pinterest for more gender reveal ideas and check out our Family page for more advice and inspiration.

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Featured image via RODNAE Productions/Pexels

Blake Lively is as multifaceted as they come. She's an actress who has starred in titles like Gossip Girl, A Simple Favor, and The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants (plus It Ends With Us). She's the founder of Betty Buzz, which has a variety of non-alcoholic mixers that taste just as good on their own as they do with liquor. And, she's also a mom. Lively has been outspoken about protecting her children from the paparazzi, making rare public appearances with them for events like her husband Ryan Reynolds' Hollywood Walk Of Fame Ceremonyandcozy date nights.

When Lively and Reynolds seemingly announced the birth of their fourth child last year, we melted. Here's everything you need to know about Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively's kids.

Is Taylor Swift friends with Blake Lively's kids?

Mike Coppola/Getty Images

Yes, Taylor Swift loves Blake Lively's kids! The family has shown up to the Eras Tour multiple times, and most recently supported the popstar at her concert in New Orleans, Louisiana. Blake and Ryan were joined by oldest daughter James (who looked amazing in a Reputation-inspired 'fit), and I can't believe how much James and Blake look alike! She's truly her mini-me! At the Philadelphia show of the Eras Tour, which Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively attended, Taylor said hello from the stage.

One funny detail about Ryan Reynolds' kids that I love is when he mentioned the girls finally realized Taylor Swift was a popstar. "I think what's most exciting for them is that for the longest time they just thought Taylor's just like an aunt, like a friend of Mommy and Daddy that's very, very close, almost family," he tellsThe Jess Cagle Show. "And then they went to a concert one day and were like, 'Ohhhhh, this isn't a hobby.'"

For Super Bowl Sunday in 2024, Blake Lively joined Taylor Swift to support beau (and KC Chiefs tight end) Travis Kelce. "Last week I left my kids for the first time ever," she says on Instagram. "I took pictures upside down and had no clue. I treated a friendship bracelet like a Flat Stanley for my husband like I didn’t realize it wasn’t ‘07. I borrowed more jewelry than the skeleton in the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. And I went clubbing. Now I know what my episode of TheTwilight Zone would look like."

How do Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively prioritize their kids?

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At the end of September, Ryan Reynolds revealed how different parenting seems to be now than when he was a kid. "Parents today are so different. We're so soft," he said at HubSpot’s INBOUND tech conference (via People). "I don't yell. I grew up with like — it was nuts, it was an improvised militia.”

“Now it's like, I can go look at all my resources for parenting and remind myself how to be perfectly compassionate,” he continued. "Something I love about [conflict resolution], and I know this is not very fancy, but what I love about it is that you can meet somebody where they are, and you don't have to be right or wrong...You can disagree and still connect."

Blake Lively recently joined an episode of her Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants' costar Amber Tamblyn's Further Adoand revealed the one unbreakable rule she made with Ryan Reynolds.

“When Ryan and I got together, we made a rule not to work at the same time,” she says. “So that we could always prioritize our personal life...That takes working really hard when we're not. Just like financial planning and sustaining that; it takes balance.”

I love that Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds are serious about their family life, and that they have identified what works for them and are sticking with it.

What is the name of Blake Lively's 4th baby?

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Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds' fourth baby is named Olin, which he revealed during the July 22 premiere of Deadpool & Wolverine!

Before Ryan chose to reveal the name, he appeared on the Today show and made a cheeky joke about it after the hosts urged him to spill the beans. He said, "We always wait for Taylor to tell us what the child's name will be. We'll say this: we're still waiting."

What are Blake Lively kids ages?

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Blake Lively's kids are all under 10. James is 9 (turning 10 on December 16), Inez is 7 (turning 8 on September 30), Betty is 4 (turning 5 on October 4), and Olin turned 1 in February.

What gender is Ryan and Blake's fourth child?

Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images

On July 26, Ryan Reynolds confirmed that he and Blake Lively's fourth baby, born in February 2023, is a boy in an Instagram video supporting mental health charity Walking 4 Hope. Speaking with founder John Bell, who struggled with suicidal ideation after the 2020 loss of his son Jake, Reynolds says, “I want to share with you that I, too, have a son...Boy, John, if I love him one-tenth as much as you love Jake, I’ll feel like I’ve done a pretty d—mn good job.”

Considering how adorable James, Inez, and Betty are, I can only imagine how cute Blake Lively's son is!

How many children do Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds have?

Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images

Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively have four kids. They welcomed their third daughter in 2019, making this new addition to the family their fourth child.

Did Blake Lively have a 4th baby?

Emma McIntyre/Getty Images for American Cinematheque

Blake Lively posted a pic on Super Bowl Sunday in 2023 showing what appears to be a post-baby body with the caption "Been busy."

Lively confirmed her fourth pregnancy in September 2022 when she arrived at her Forbes event in NYC cradling a baby bump and by posting her own personal photos on Instagramhoping that "the 11 guys waiting outside [her] home for a 🦄 sighting will leave [her] alone."

How old was Blake Lively when she had her first child?

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Blake Lively was 27 when she gave birth to her first daughter, James, in December of 2014.

Why did Blake Lively name her daughter James?

Matt Winkelmeyer/Getty Images

The couple decided to name their daughter James after Reynolds' late father. While the name connects both James and Reynolds to his father, it also gives Lively the chance to bond with her daughter over having historically male names. "I liked having a boy's name," Lively said on Good Morning Americain 2015. "I thought I'd pass it on."

Their third daughter Betty's name is a tribute to Lively's late father. We didn't know the name of the couple's third baby until Taylor Swift used all three names in her 2020 album folklore. Swift also used James' voice at the beginning of her 2017 track "Gorgeous"! Does that mean we'll hear one of Ryan Reynolds' children in Reputation (Taylor's Version)? I hope so!

What has Ryan Reynolds said about raising their kids?

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In a conversation with Hugh Jackman ahead of Deadpool & Wolverine, Ryan Reynolds opened up about how his family has helped his anxiety. "I think it makes it better because your focus is less on yourself and more on your kids," he says (via People). "I love that I've had anxiety because when I see my kids experiencing some of that, which is probably genetic, I know how to address it in a way that is compassionate, that actually allows them to feel seen. I know that I can't just fix it. And I can communicate all that stuff to them and with them. I'm always grateful for it."

Per People, Ryan Reynolds has also made it clear he and Blake are wholly invested in the kids' daily lives. The doting husband and father enjoys the moments of "walking them to school and walking them back" as it deepens their bond. More than anything, Ryan and Blake's main goal is to make sure they teach their kids how to be introspective with Ryan saying "the thing we sort of hang our hat on the most is self-awareness with our kids."

Jamie McCarthy/Getty Images

However, that doesn't mean Blake and Ryan don't absolutely love being parents. "We're very excited [and] we wouldn't do this four times if we didn't love it," he says in an interview with CNBC's Power Lunch. "Everybody's doing great. Everybody's actually doing fantastic. I think if we hadn't figured it out by now, I think we'd be in deep, deep trouble."

"It's a zoo over here," he jokes. "This is my office here, this is where I'll probably — to be honest, I'll probably spend the rest of my life in here."

We love how much energy Ryan and Blake are pouring into their kids. It's always beautiful when parents are able to be present with their kids and teach them how to be present with themselves. Ryan Reynolds has also mentioned how having daughters "has been such a ride." Since he comes from a family of all boys, having daughters is something that was beyond his wildest dreams! “I love being a girl dad,” Ryan tells Access in 2020. “I have three daughters, which I never in a million years would imagine.”

He mentioned his newest child in June of 2023, when he announced his new series Bedtime Stories. "The idea for a show made to help everyone fall asleep was born the same day as my fourth child," he says on Instagram.

Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images

The Deadpool actor also offered some parenting advice on Amanda Hirsch’s hit podcastNot Skinny But Not Fat. "Embrace the chaos,” he tells Hirsch. "[Blake] always says, ‘They're all under our roof right now. The whole family's under our roof right now. We have them all.’ And that is a fleeting thing. Not an infinite resource, you know?”

While Reynolds understands firsthand how overwhelming parenting can feel, he also doesn't wish away this time with four young kids: “Just say, ‘Think about what you would give in 40 years or 30 years to come back and enjoy this one moment.’"

Besides this, Ryan knows their kids' childhoods don't mirror his or Blake's. However, he's not trying to place a huge emphasis on that because he wants them to have "as normal a life as possible" (via Page Six).

"I try not to impose upon them the difference in their childhood to my childhood or my wife’s childhood," he said (via The Hollywood Reporter). "We both grew up very working class, and I remember when they were very young, I used to say or think, like, ‘Oh God, I would never have had a gift like this when I was a kid,’ or, ‘I never would’ve had this luxury of getting takeout,’ or whatever."

In his eyes, he doesn't feel like it's the kids' responsibility or "bag of rocks to carry" because they're full of "gratitude" and "have a strong sense of empathy." That's how he knows he and Blake are "doing an OK job" as parents.

How has motherhood affected Blake Lively?

Dimitrios Kambouris/Staff/Getty Images Entertainment via Getty Images;Art by Claire Shadomy/B+C

Blake Lively opened up about how Ryan Reynolds and she monitor screen safety for their kids, which is definitely something top-of-mind in 2024. “This is not an ad. I get nothing out of this. I just love @tappityapp,” she said of the STEM-focused educational app. “It’s engaging, informative, fun and they care about safety."

She also jokes that she's learning new things right along with her kids! But, no matter how educational or fun an app is, Blake Lively also emphasizes the importance of engaging with her kids' devices: "I’m always triple checking any kids app constantly for safety because that’s my responsibility not an app’s, but I do LOVE this one.”

Despite its fun and funny moments, the actress has admitted being a mom is hard, but she did it with her signature dry sense of humor. “BettyBooze at your service," she wrote in an Instagram Story announcing the new brand. "These are recipes I’ve been making for loved ones for years. But I have 4 kids now. And I’m tired. So here they are. In a can."

Emma McIntyre/Getty Images for American Cinematheque

However, Blake Lively absolutely loves motherhood, and says in a 2022 interview with Forbes that having children has made her feel more comfortable in her own skin. "Once I had children, that just became even more profound because my time was even more precious, but also I think having children for me made me feel so much more in my skin," she says. "I never felt more myself or at ease in my own body or more confident — not to say that there aren't a bevy of insecurities coming at me a million times a day, but I just feel incredibly settled."

Speaking with People in 2021, Lively also explains how important it is that her children see her accomplish things outside the home. "I want to be as present of a mother as humanly possible and I want them to feel my presence, but I also think the best way to be the best mother is to show them that you can have a life and have a passion and have an identity outside of just being a mother," Lively says.

While she acknowledges that motherhood is all-encompassing, and it looks different for everyone, she knows that having your own identity is very important. "Teaching them that they can maintain themselves and that everything is possible [is crucial]," she adds.

When did Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds have their daughters?

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Blake Lively's children were all born in the last 10 years. Blake Lively's daughters are James, Inez, Betty, and her fourth child is named Olin! Their fourth baby's name was announced during the premiere of Deadpool & Wolverine. Blake gave birth to James in 2014, while Inez was born in 2016. Lively gave birth to Betty in 2019 and Olin in February of 2023.

Do Ryan Reynolds and Blake Lively's kids have nannies?

Jamie McCarthy / Staff

Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds' children don't have a nanny. "I feel like I could sometimes have a bit of a short fuse, but there's just been this weirdly endless supply of patience," Ryan told GQ in 2015. "I have no problem waking up five times in the middle of the night and changing diapers, and as exhausted as you get, I have this stupid grin on my face all the time."

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This story has been updated.

Finding gifts for the person you're closest to can be the absolute hardest thing to do, especially when there are so many things that would make great gifts for him. If you're shopping for the main man in your life this season – whether you call him your dad, husband, fiancé, boyfriend, partner, or your preferred pet names – of course you want to find a gift that shows him just how much he means to you. Just remember that the key to the perfect gift is simply that it comes from you. These stunning gift ideas will help you say "this made me think of you."

Our 50 favorite gifts for men for 2024:

Target

Epson EpiqVision Mini EF22 Portable Smart Laser Projector

Make movie nights even more epic with this mini portable projector. The Dolby audio sound is AMAZING and the full HDR picture quality is perfect, plus you can project as big as a 150-inch screen! Watch his (and your) favorite movies, shows, sporting events, Oscars?, gaming, and more anywhere, indoors and out. It comes with a Google TV setup with access to more 10,000 apps, including favorites like Netflix and Prime. It's super simple to set up and a great way to bring in a screen wherever you want. No additional supplies needed! Also it comes in a bunch of cool colors. This is a splurge gift that's totally worth it and will make cozy nights at home even cozier. We love it!

Amazon

RVCA Commonwealth Snapback

This flat-brimmed baseball cap replaces those older, worn-out styles you know your man has been hoarding. The green corduroy fabric on this gift-worthy hat will grace his head perfectly for every season!

Apple Watch SE

Get him motivated to reach his fitness goals with features like fitness tracking and heart rate monitoring, plus he can send a text, take a call, listen to his favorite music and podcasts. You can customize the watch faces and bands to his liking too. It's the perfect gift for the active guy!

Amazon

Every Man Jack Mens Amber + Sandalwood Body Set

This gift set is filled with an ideal assortment of gifts for him. From body wash, shampoo, deodorant, and face wash, your man will have everything he needs to feel fresh – plus, having a good-smelling guy around is the real gift for you that keeps on giving.

Nike

Nike Air VaporMax Flyknit

Be his biggest cheerleader as he reaches his 2025 fitness goals in these best-selling Nikes, made with sustainable materials. We are loving this vintage green.

Target

VANKYO Leisure D30T Mini Wi-Fi Projector

Bring the cinema home to your movie buff with a sleek projector setup for your own private screenings and viewing parties!

Sunswell

Sunswell The R&R Pant

Made from recycled materials for rigorous wear, the Sunswell R&R pants are bound to be a staple in your man's year-round wardrobe.

Amazon

Cosori Pour Over Coffee Maker

This sturdy coffee maker will be a total hit for the caffeine-loving guy in your life. The layered stainless steel filter allows for a rich, creamy flavor in every sip, plus the decanter is holds a whole 34 ounces of brewed coffee to help him wake up!

Amazon

Stanley Stainless Steel Shot Glass and Flask Gift Set

This durable drinking set complete with a flask and shot glasses will be his new BFF for sharing on camping, fishing, or hunting trips. Top it all off with a brand-new bottle of whiskey to complete the gift for him.

Creem

Creem Magazine Subscription

For the music-loving man in your life, a subscription to Creem (the coolest rock 'n' roll mag) will really impress. The publication's covered plenty of classic names in the industry – as well as newer bands – so he's sure to soak up plenty of new knowledge about the scene. There's a handful of annual subscription tiers for the mag starting at just $79.

Amazon

Thermajohn Thermal Shirt

Whether he's hitting the slopes or is braving the cold winter weather to run errands with you, this warm thermal base layer tee will swarm his upper half in comfort, flexibly moving with his each and every move.

Herschel

Herschel Little America Backpack Pro

For his outdoor adventures or social gatherings, outfit him with a cool backpack (literally, this one is insulated) that he can fill with his favorite snacks and beverages.

Ties

Ties The Scientist Sock Pack

Whether it's a stocking stuffer or a smaller gift, a playful set of socks is both practical and personal.

Tie Bar

Tie Bar Navy Travel Tie Storage Case

This tie storage case means business, just like your man does. If he travels for work often, he'll appreciate that you're looking out for his formal-wear.

Amazon

Marlowe. Coffee Bar Soap

This manly bar soap is infused with coffee beans and cocoa butter butter that help tackle even the worst bouts of sweat and body odor. It's definitely long-lasting, too, so he can smell lovely all night long.

Taylor Stitch

Taylor Stitch The Workhorse Jacket

This jacket will hug his bod in the most stylish way, all while keeping him comfy throughout the season's cold weather.

Williams Sonoma

Breville Precision Brewer 12-Cup Drip Coffee Maker with Glass Carafe

For the early risers and coffee-obsessed, a programmable coffee maker means he can wake up to the smell of coffee every day (and no longer has to use wasteful pods for an instant brew).

Mark & Graham

Mark & Graham Italian Leather Desk Set

Whether he's going to work, outfitting a permanent at-home office, or heading back to school, a personalized desk set like this luxe leather one will please the most studious types of guys.

Nordstrom

Ugg Beckett Fleece Robe

If your man loves a cozy night in just as much as you do, a soft robe to lounge around in will make the ultimate gift for him.

Mejuri

Mejuri Flat Curb Chain Necklace

Once you've reached long-term status with your guy, gift him a signature gold chain he can flex for years to come.

Pangaia

Pangaia 365 Heavyweight Hoodie

For the hoodie-obsessed, Pangaia's signature sustainable sweatshirts (and sweatsuits!) are best-in-class.

Etsy

Custom Soundwave Art Print

From a first dance song to the one you always blast together in the car, every guy has their favorite tune. Memorialize it for your music-loving man with this custom art print.

DUER

DUER Performance Relaxed Taper Denim Jeans

A good quality, fresh pair of denim is gonna set him (and his style) so right for the new year. These jeans feature a stretchy fabric that'll allow wear for practically any occasion.

Mark & Graham

Mark & Graham Leather Poker Set

Outfit his next game night with a poker set that's sure to impress and easy to bring on the go for weekend trips and group hangs.

New Balance

New Balance 9060 Sneaker

Secure your status as the greatest of all time by copping him that stylish pair of sneakers he's been eyeing.

Amazon

Polaroid Now 2nd Generation I-Type Instant Camera + Film Bundle

If your man is into photography and all things nostalgia, consider surprising him with a retro Polaroid camera set. We bet you'll be his favorite muse.

Manly Bands

Manly Bands The Forged Ring

This sleek wedding band stands up to tough, hands-on jobs with a carbon fiber construction, unlike traditional rings. The inner part is actually made from a Jack Daniel's whiskey barrel, making the perfect personalized touch for gifting the guy who loves a drink.

Uncommon Goods

New York Times Custom Football Book

This isn't just any coffee table book, but one that true sports buffs will actually want to devour – with clippings from his team's history, glory days, and highlights.

Still trying to figure out the perfect gifts for him? Subscribe to our email newsletter for more gift guides!

Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others and earn commissions, but we always offer genuine editorial recommendations.

This post has been updated. Former reporting by Kaitlyn Ingram and Lauren Black.

Everyone deals with family issues, but some people had more dysfunctional childhoods than others. Are there ways to tell? According to family psychologist Caitlin Slavens of Mamapsychologistsand therapist Rachel D. Miller, Ph.D., LMFT of Hold The Vision Therapy, yes!

Slavens says, "As a family psychologist, I’ve seen how growing up in a dysfunctional family leaves its mark. Sometimes the signs are glaring, like obvious chaos or neglect." However, she said the signs can also be "more subtle" being that they're "things you don’t even realize were 'off' until you’re older." You may even "start noticing patterns in yourself or your relationships" if you've become retrospective, according to her.

Here are all the subtle signs you grew up in a dysfunctional family

1. You're never sure what kind of mood your parents will be in before you walk in the living room or kitchen.

Emma Bauso

Let's put this on record: parenting is tough — especially on top of trying to maintain a work-life balance. But, this doesn't mean you're meant to be unsure of what to expect every time you come around your parents. If you have to "'read the room'" a lot "before speaking," Slavens indicates this is one of the more subtle signs of dysfunction.

This is where you may have learned how to become passive-aggressive if that's something you struggle with. The reason for this is because "clear and direct communication is avoided and/or seen as bad or aggressive," according to Dr. Miller.

2. You tend to feel like you're constantly compared to and in competition with your siblings.

August de Richelieu

My heart truly wants to believe this isn't intentional behavior from parents, but I can't say I haven't heard people talk about feeling like they'd never measure up to the 'golden child' of their family. You may have felt insecure about your grades, the college you chose to go to, your career goals, or even your physical appearance. Slavens says this "struggle with self-worth or second-guessing yourself constantly" is yet another sign that your family's dynamic wasn't the healthiest.

Also, Dr. Miller says this could've caused you to learn to "shrink yourself in the presence of loved ones." Even worse, you may "feel the need to hide pieces of yourself in order to be loved and accepted."

3. There was constant yelling and screaming during arguments, making you fearful of disagreements or hardships.

Kaboompics.com

If you grew up in a home where arguments always led to screaming and yelling, chances are you're not a fan of loud voices or hard moments. Honestly, Slavens says it's not hard to believe that "conflict make you anxious, even when it’s minor." Unsurprisingly, you may have become a referee during these arguments and currently find yourself being a mediator in your platonic or romantic relationships. Why?

Dr. Miller says, "You constantly feel the need to manage everyone else’s emotions often at the cost of your own needs and wellbeing." You know, to keep the peace.

Here are some more obvious signs you grew up in a dysfunctional family

4. You had to take on a parental role when one of your parents decided to stop being an adult.

cottonbro studio

I imagine that having an emotionally immature parent is one of the most aggravating and stressful things to deal with. Not only that, but you may have had to help keep the household afloat. You may have had to get a job or two to help pay bills, listening to an adult conversation as your mom or dad laid their problems at your young feet, and more!

If you "family roles were flipped" and you "maybe had to parent your own parents," Slavens says this is a form of emotional dysfunction.

5. You weren't allowed to go anywhere with your friends because your parents wanted to keep an eye on you at all times.

Ketut Subiyanto

Slavens says boundaries that "didn't exist" or "were rigid and controlling" is a sign your home was a little...interesting. Being concerned about your whereabouts is one thing, but it's another when you're unable to do anything without your parents' eagle-eyes on you. Something as simple as going to the mall with your friends may have become a lecture about the dangers of shoplifting or car wrecks. Again, these are valid concerns but they shouldn't be treated like the verbal form of doom scrolling.

6. You consistently witnessed one of your parents abuse alcohol or drugs at home.

Ksenia Chernaya

This is a tough because substance abuse is so prevalent in varies socioeconomic statuses and communities. From the functioning alcoholic to the one who becomes belligerent after they've had too much to drink, it always affects those around them. Slavens says if "there was ongoing neglect, substance abuse, or verbal/physical aggression," your home probably didn't safe.

I recognize some of these signs of a dysfunctional family. But that doesn't mean they're affecting my current relationships, right?

Ron Lach

I hate to break it to you, but it's possible your childhood wounds have shown up before. "Dysfunctional dynamics don’t stay in childhood — they tend to creep into how you connect with others," says Slavens. Similarly, Dr. Miller agrees that "we typically repeat what we learned at home with our families in our other relationships." How?

"This includes the beliefs and rules we follow, often completely subconsciously, about what can and can’t talk about and why, as well as what emotions are allowed to be expressed, who can express them and how, and how we should or must respond to those people and their emotions," explains Dr. Miller.

Another way to look at this is how Slavens has outlined it:

In Platonic Relationships:

  1. Overextending yourself to please others, even at your own expense
  2. Feeling like you have to "earn your friends' affections.
  3. Avoiding vulnerability because it feels unsafe.

In Romantic Relationships:

  1. Struggling to trust your partner or feeling overly suspicious
  2. Repeating patterns like dating people who are emotionally unavailable or controlling.
  3. Feeling overly responsible for your partner's happiness — or relying on them for yours.

OMG! How do I unlearn habits from my dysfunctional family?

Antoni Shkraba

Honestly, everyone has a few bad habits they've carried from their childhood to adulthood. You're not an outlier because some things weren't 100% normal so I don't want you to feel like you're a failure for not having having it all together. "Dysfunction doesn’t have to define your future relationships," Slavens assures. Dr. Miller says you can start to unlearn things "that aren't working for you anymore" by "gathering your family's larger context to gain insight into how and why, for them, the behaviors make sense."

By taking a look at your family's "history and larger social and political contexts" gives you a chance to "see them as whole people with full lives," she says. Once you do that, she believes "you can examine what pieces make sense for you to keep and what parts you'd like to learn to do differently." Her other suggestion? Don't forget you're ability to utilize a "therapist who works systemically, like an LMFT" who "can be a huge support in this process."

Anastasia Shuraeva

Slavens' tips include the following:

  1. Practice self-awareness: Notice when a response feels automatic — like people-pleasing or shutting down during conflict — and ask yourself, Is this helping me, or is this a leftover habit from the past?
  2. Set boundaries: If your childhood lacked healthy boundaries, learning to say “no” without guilt is a game-changer. Boundaries protect your energy and teach others how to treat you.
  3. Learn healthy conflict skills: If conflict made you feel unsafe growing up, it’s natural to avoid it. But healthy conflict is necessary in relationships. Practice expressing your needs calmly and directly.
  4. Therapy, therapy, therapy: A good therapist can help untangle the messy, “weird” things that got normalized and give you tools to rebuild healthier ways of relating to yourself and others.
  5. Surround yourself with healthier models: Whether it’s friends, mentors, or books/podcasts, seek examples of functional relationships and start observing what feels different.

While you're busy unlearning things, Dr. Miller also wants you to remember something. "Recognize that how your family does something is simply that; how your particular family system figured out and were taught to navigate the world. It isn’t inherently right because you’ve normalized it nor is the way another person or family does it inherently wrong," she says.

Slavens' final thoughts? "It’s not about blaming your family but recognizing how your experiences shaped you — and giving yourself permission to do things differently. You’re allowed to rewrite the script."

Visit the top signs to recognize if you have toxic friends on Brit + Co!

Since I just harped on all the dreary, outdated shoe trends for 2025, it's only fair I give you all the options you should wear in the new year! I also heard you when you said to let people wear what they want... Since I try to be a girl's girl, I want to give you as many exciting shoe trends that'll align with your personal style as well.

Instead of solely relying on my own wits this time, I reached out to Stitch Fix stylish Jessica Sockel; fashion expert and principal of The Curio, Maggie Gillette Sowislo; personal stylist Sarah Brandt of Shop the City; and Rusty Hall, CEO of Mephisto USA. Here's what stylists and fashion experts have to say about all the best shoe trends for 2025!

Scroll for all the 2025 shoe trends your feet — and outfits — will love!

Steve Madden

1. 'Mocha Mousse' Kitten Heel Boots

Don't fight it — this style is back and better than ever. "We have all seen that Pantone has named 'Mocha Mousse' [color of the year], cementing that brown has surpassed black as the go-to neutral," Brandt muses. As for why she believes kitten heels boots will be a popular style in 2025, she believes it's a "super wearable" choice "for the colder weather months."

Check 'em out:Steve Madden Stasia Taupe Suade Kitten Heel Boots

Thursday Boots

2. Elevated loafers and flats on par with 'Quiet Luxury'

Did you really think we were done with quiet luxury? This is a trend that "focuses on classic design and high quality materials," according to Hall. After the success of, well, Succession, people aren't ready to let this trend go — and I don't blame them! Hall says, "We’re seeing a movement away from runway and status brands of the past several years, and instead, consumers have been drawn toward the echo of vintage style."

Hall also feels like people are looking to add comfort instead of "overabundance" to their wardrobes. He explained that after the pandemic, "comfort has prevailed as a predominant factor in shopping for footwear." You'll want to steer clear of gaudy designs with this shoe trend, instead reaching for "shoes with premium construction and materials" that don't have "noisy logos."

If you want a little bit of height, Sockel says "chunky loafers became a go-to for achieving the 'Prep School' aesthetic." She also saw that "ballet flats were a top request, with 38% of shoppers seeking ways to style them."

Check 'em out:Thursday Boots Penny Loafers

Dolce Vita

3. Low profile sneakers

This year saw the rise of the 'errand' or everyday sneaker. Hall says, "In contrast to the chunky sneaker silhouette, low-profile sneakers have been trending in 2024, and expect to see that trend continue in 2025."He adds that they're "defined by the upper confirming closely to the foot and lack of support around the ankle" making them "exceptionally versatile".

Both he and Brandt agree that the "iconic Adidas Sambas" are the driving force behind this with the latter adding, "But as they can be hard to come by, I’m seeing some alternate sneakers take the stage — particularly the Adidas SL72, and Onitsuka Tigers, especially the Mexico 66s."

If you need inspo for how to style them! Hall has a couple of tips because "the timeless low-profile look isn't going anywhere." He feels pairing them with "bell bottoms or flare-legged jeans" because they "create a long, clean line."

Check 'em out:Dolce Vita Notice Stitch Sneakers

Dolce Vita

4. Colorful shoes

The world already feels like a mess sometimes — why not be bold and have fun with your outfits?! While you continue leaning into the red and burgundy shades that continued to trend this year, Hall feels that "turquoise, fuchsia, and yellow tones will brighten up this spring from the past couple of seasons of neutrals."

Another outfit tip he has is to "opt for white and soft ecru shades in the rest of the outfit" as this will "help these bold colors speak for themselves."

Check 'em out:Dolce Vita Kanika Mid Heels

Net-a-Porter

5. T-Strap Shoes

If you're still watching The Great Gatsby, you may be familiar with what Gillette Sowislo calls the "new shoe profile." In other words, she feels they're "an update on the Mary Jane trend we've been seeing for a few seasons."

We couldn't get enough of the revival of this that trend so it's going to be exciting to see you and other shoppers rock them with your 2025 outfits. Honestly, Sowislo is sure that "this versatile design can be found in flats, heels, and wedges."

Check 'em out:Manolo Blahnik Assala 105 Leather Point-Toe Pumps

Dansko

6. Wooden Platform Shoes

Wooden platform shoes are having their comeback moment; more notably clogs. Sowislo says, "Since Chloe designer Chemena Kamali decked out the front row of her show in matching wood-bottomed platform sandals, the trend for boho-inspired shoes has risen. These can look like the playful platforms she debuted or be a more practical pair of everyday clogs."

Sockel added, "Looking ahead, we [Stitch Fix] predict a shift toward heeled shoes—think chic booties, clogs, and sandals—that pair seamlessly with oversized jeans and a simple tee for an effortlessly polished Easy Street look."

Check 'em out:Dansko Professional Clogs

Subscribe to our newsletter for more 2025 style inspo!

Brit + Co may at times use affiliate links to promote products sold by others, but always offers genuine editorial recommendations.

Architecture Digest's Open Door video series is a juicy peek inside the homes of celebs — and we’re a bit obsessed. From Emma Roberts' cozy, book-filled retreat to Kendall Jenner's serene and chic abode, these tours aren’t just about stunning interiors; they also give us a rare glimpse into their at-home personalities. Live with Kelly and Mark hosts Kelly Ripa and Mark Consuelos’ recent upper East Side tour had me gushing, but also with a few pauses, like huh? Their five-story home felt like a love letter to their relationship as much as an example of their impeccable style. Here are 10 surprising moments from their beautiful AD house tour!

Scroll down to see all the surprising moments from Kelly Ripa & Mark Consuelos' house tour!

Eyeball Art

Architectural Digest | Art by Marc Quinn

The series of painted photographs by artist Marc Quinn outside Kelly and Mark's bedrooms were one of the bigger surprises. They feature a close-up and enlarged image of their three kids' eyeballs. "They don't live here anymore, but it still feels like they're still with us," says Mark. I'm not an empty nester yet, but I can't tell if he's joking here or not. "I can stare at my kids' eyes forever," adds Kelly. SAME.

TVs Behind Mirrors

Architectural Digest

As someone who really dislikes the look of TVs in any room except a room dedicated to bingeing, I love all of the hidden TVs in their bedroom (shown above), living room, and Mark's man cave.

Escargot Toothpicks

Architectural Digest

This actually has a sweet story behind it, and as an escargot/snail lover, this gift is actually pretty cute. The home was designed with AD100 Hall of Fame interior designer William Sofield, known for his modern luxury style, and he gifted this to them because their son loved escargot, surprisingly at age 9 (at the same time when Sofield was designing the home).

The Dark Cave (on The Fifth Floor)

Architectural Digest

The first surprise moment was Mark's Bar 5, which is where the tour begins. The dark interior was a bit of a surprise until you see the rest of the house in its luxe and neutral palette. It's called Bar 5, Mark notes, because it's on the fifth floor of their forever home, so basically the opposite of a man cave!

They Share A Bathroom!

Architectural Digest

Few couples would choose to share a bathroom and closet if they could afford a place with more than one. That was one of the more endearing parts of their tour. This couple still really loves each other and it's SO cute to see. Even with kids out of the house, they choose to share a bathroom and closet because it brings them closer. #relationshipgoals!

I Want To Be Where People Aren't Pillow

Architectural Digest

Is Kelly Ripa actually an introvert? She spends her time writing at the desk in their bedroom and a split second reveals this cheeky needlepoint pillow. I love their sense of a humor, which really shines through in this video.

Lazy Susan Dining Table

Architectural Digest

I have a soft spot for round dining tables — I feel like they naturally encourage everyone to be part of the conversation. For Kelly and Mark, their dining table has a special feature: it actually turns 360 degrees like a Lazy Susan. Amazing!

Translucent Cabinetry

Architectural Digest

Kelly notes that their translucent cabinetry keeps them honest and forces them to be organized. When Mark talks about the decision-making that went around cabinet pulls, I felt SO seen. Every decision in my home came pretty easily except choosing the cabinet pulls! It felt ridiculous, but I labored over this major (minor?) renovation choice.

The Living Room Trap Door

Architectural Digest

Finally, the hilarious comment from Mark about trapping guests in the living room with a sliding door had me LOL. They are truly adorable and silly. Take a peek inside this totally fun and heart-tugging tour!

Watch Kelly Ripa & Mark Consuelos' Full House Tour Here!

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