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The Moments That Sparked My Body Insecurity

I can't remember how old I was, but the first time I heard variations of, "She's so little. Are you sure you're feeding her," was from church and family members. Meant as harmless jokes, they caused me to become hyper aware of my body in a way I'd never been before.

I knew people looked different, but my innocence made me believe it didn't matter. Adults were the ones who taught me it did, and if you didn't look 'just right'? Well, you'd eventually hear hushed whispers about it. From that point on, I stopped being picky with my food and tried to eat more than I usually did. But, guess whose body remained the same?

The more I ate and the more my body didn't change, the more I started to resent it for not looking the way I thought a well-fed child's body should look.

Introduction To Puberty

By the time I'd reached 3rd grade, I started hearing whispers about girls who were going through puberty. There was a ton of excitement about getting your period, but mostly everyone talked about how bodies started to 'fill out.' I was disappointed when 'the change' didn't happen for me that year, but I kept hope alive. Needless to say, I didn't gain weight in elementary school even though my friends' bodies were changing.The only signs of puberty I had were the first signs of underarm and pubic hair.

I didn't get my period until after the first day of sixth grade. It was relatively uneventful because I wasn't in pain and didn't see the second one until months later. As the months passed, my periods came and went. But, my body still looked unappealing to me. It didn't help that the guys in school were looking at girls who were more curvaceous either. I had major side character energy in school (or so I thought) and it was awful IMO. It's not that I wasn't liked, but the guys I thought were worth going after had their sights set on girls who didn't look like me.

By the time I made it to my junior year in high school, I stopped worrying about my appearance as much. I'd stopped really focusing on boys and started having fun with new friends. That was the best year in high school because my elective was a journalism class where I became the entertainment editor for the school newspaper. As far as my body insecurity? I barely thought twice about it because I felt I had more to offer than looks.

The Slow Journey To Accepting My Body

By the time I was in my early twenties, it was beyond clear that the body I had was the one given to me. I was tired of wishing I wasn't so slender and decided to start accepting my body for how it looked. I wish I could say I was 100% okay with my body after writing down a ton of affirmations to look at daily, but I wasn't.

I didn't start making peace with being slender until after I turned 28 (right after this photo was taken), and it started to feel good to stop worrying about why I wasn't a certain size. I'd wake up and be more concerned about wearing things that made me feel good instead of fixating on why my body was so small. Honestly, I didn't even flinch the day I found out I was pregnant because I figured I wouldn't gain much weight.

Pregnancy + Postpartum Body Changes

I should've prefaced that last sentence by saying I was convinced I'd still be small during pregnancy because my mom was small — like me — until her second pregnancy. Along with other people, I thought I'd have a round basketball in my stomach and that would be it. But, the day my stepdad rushed my fiancé and I to the hospital so I could give birth is the day I realized I'd gone from 117 pounds to 157.

I was blissfully unaware that my body had changed that much, and it was shocking because I couldn't fit into my carefully curated pre-pregnancy wardrobe. Not only was my postpartum body sore, but it also felt like I'd sprouted extra inches around my waist, hips, and thighs. I went from wanting those things to hating them when they started showing up.

I was devastated because I felt like I'd just learned how to accept my body, only to find new changes waiting for me to welcome into the picture. Also, everything was so soft and squishy — unlike the days where my slender frame felt like it had just enough to cover my bones.

Sadly, I lashed out at my fiancé a ton because I felt uncomfortable in my body — even though he couldn't see anything wrong with it. I was convinced he was trying to do damage control every time he tried to reassure me because I was dealing with major body insecurity.

I didn't start to truly see myself until I started going back to therapy and chose to accept my body as it is. This didn't happen overnight either. I wrote a ton of affirmations on sticky notes to place on my bathroom mirror, and recounted all the miraculous changes my body's gone through over the years. I also started giving myself grace for all the times I wasn't so kind to my body and made myself live in that space until it didn't feel like I had imposter syndrome anymore.

At the time of writing this, my son is three and I'm finally able to look in the mirror without criticizing myself — and I have the fourth trimester to thank for that. My postpartum body expanded in ways I never thought was possible, and it's shown me that change is only bad when I try to hold tight to other people's expectations.

How I Maintain Love For My Postpartum Body

Technically I haven't been postpartum in a while, but I always refer to my body this way because it serves as a reminder that it's been a long journey towards acceptance. The ways I continue to pour into myself vary from day to day, but here's the gist of what helps:

1. Daily Affirmations
2. Words Of Encouragement From My Partner
3. Reminders That My Body Knew What To Do To Carry A Child For 9 Months
4. Wearing Clothes I Genuinely Feel Good In
5. Replacing Negative Thoughts With Positive Ones
6. Giving Myself Grace For All The Moments I Hated My Body
7. Daily Gratitude Practice
8. Accepting That My Body Will Ebb & Flow Over The Years
9. Solo Dance Parties In My Bra & Underwear (I'm so serious, ha!)
10. Touching The Expanded Parts Of My Body & Saying "Hi")
    

What's the difference between cold and allergy symptoms?

Having seasonal allergies can be confusing when they coincide with cold season. Between kids being back in school and the weather changing, the fall/winter seasons seem to bring on sneezing, coughing, and more. But, how can you tell when you're merely dealing with allergies or something else?

"Colds are viral infections. Symptoms include a sore throat, cough and feeling tired," says Dr. Purdy. Dr. Stanford further explains that viral infections have "traditionally been Rhinovirus species, but it may also be Adenovirus species and others." Colds can also be accompanied by a fever in some cases.

On the other hand, Dr. Purdy and Dr. Stanford both agree allergies are specifically caused by allergens or irritants. "Common Symptoms include sneezing and itchy eyes," says Dr. Purdy. According to the CDC, around one quarter of adults deal with seasonal allergies (raises both hands), so it's not weird if you get confused about when it's time to switch from Claritin to Dayquil.

How should people relieve cold symptoms before heading to the pharmacy?

Before you head to CVS at the first sign of sneezing and a sore throat, there are a few things Dr. Stanford suggests you do. "Optimizing our immune systems by focusing on overall health and wellbeing can help reduce the risk of infections, including the common cold. This includes eating a healthy diet, being physically active, getting enough sleep, and keeping stress in check," she says.

Unfortunately, Gallupreports that 57% of people feel they're not getting the proper amount of sleep they need. But, this doesn't mean you should ignore your lack of rest just because others are struggling too. Take it from someone whose insomnia impacted their mental health and a nasty bout of the Flu followed by Covid-19 two years ago! "Properly treating other health conditions can also help prevent acute illnesses, like the common cold," says Dr. Stanford.

However, it's not unusual to get a cold because Dr. Stanford says they're the "result of germs spread from contact with others." Taking precautions just helps your immune system work the eliminate the viral infection faster.

Do elderberry and Vitamin C fight off colds?

This is where things get a little tricky. Though elderberry and Vitamin C have been hailed as supplements that combat colds, not everyone agrees on their effectiveness. Dr. Stanford says, "While the evidence for Vitamin C in treating colds is mixed, sufficient research suggests that taking vitamin C supplementation can shorten the duration and reduce the severity of cold symptoms." But if you're thinking about relying on Vitamin C supplements, Dr. Stanford is less likely to encourage you to take them because they haven't been proven "to be effective in preventing common cold symptoms."

She also doesn't think you should take elderberry as if that'll also fight off a viral infection. "Elderberry is not effective in preventing colds, and evidence is insufficient to suggest that it is effective in treating the common cold," she explains.

Do you recommend relying on Emergen-C to help combat cold symptoms?

So, what's the verdict on taking Emergen-C once it's confirmed you have a viral cold? The brand has several products that range from gummies to drink mixes, all aimed at supporting your immune system — but does that mean they're safe to take? According to Dr. Purdy, they are! "Emergen-C contains Vitamin C which is great for a good and healthy immune system and recovery. It also contains other good for you ingredients that help with your immune system like vitamin E and Zinc."

However, it's valid to want to know if there's a difference between Zicam and Emergen-C. According to Dr. Stanford, there is! "Similar to Vitamin C, evidence suggests that zinc may be effective in reducing the duration and severity of cold symptoms, but it is less likely to be effective in preventing the common cold," she explains. Plainly put, think of the two like this:

• Zicam = Zinc
• Emergen-C = Vitamin C

She even says, "Studies suggest taking both zinc and vitamin C could be beneficial!"

Can certain teas help soothe sore throats associated with colds?

Drinking warm tea can help alleviate cold symptoms, though you shouldn't think they're your only defense against viral infections. In conjunction with cold medicines, "throat coat teas really help soothe inflammation and help manage symptoms," says Dr. Purdy. The reason for this is that most "throat support products are indicated to ameliorate sore throat and similar symptoms, often by numbing agents, temperature, and other factors," Dr. Stanford explains. In short, don't be afraid to use tea as a form of hydration while you're sick!

Dr. Purdy says other things you can use to help alleviate your symptoms are a humidifier, nasal spray, and drops. Take it a step further by taking a "steam shower" to "provide some much needed relief."

Shop Emergen-C, Zicam, & Throat Coat Teas

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Traditional Medicinals Throat Coat Original With Slippery Elm

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Nick and Jess from New Girl

My #1 favorite TV kiss of all time is Jess and Nick's first kiss. It's truly unbeatable! This will-they-won't-they situation left us all begging for them to finally get together — and boy, did they come through! The tension and chemistry between this pair had me truly convince they must be a couple in real life. This kiss had so much passion, and it made fans everywhere so happy that it FINALLY happened. Honorable mention for Cece and Schmidt, because they're also a fave TV couple!

Joanne and Noah from Nobody Wants This

Joanne and the Hot Rabbi — I mean Noah — come in at #2 here. I haven't fallen in love with a show this hard in such a long time, and their first kiss made me feel the same way I did when I watched New Girl. It had all the same passion, pent-up chemistry, and even the whole going-in-for-seconds thing going for it. Let's hope we get even more of their amazing chemistry in season 2!

Rachel and Ross from Friends

Rachel and Ross are a classic TV couple — and for good reason. We fell in love with their on-again-off-again relationship over so many seasons, but most of all we admired their ability to put the past behind them (ie: the "we were on a break" situation of it all). But I'm still not over their season 2 kiss in the coffee shop...itt was everything! Truly one of the best TV kisses ever.

Luke and Lorelai from Gilmore Girls

Hello, the friends-to-lovers arc has officially entered the chat! Being a romantic doesn't just mean you want the whole "love at first sight" thing. It can also be romantic to have the foundation of a friendship over years and years, because that creates the ultimate compatibility, IMO! These two are the perfect example of that, and their first kiss was well worth the wait.

Fitz and Olivia from Scandal

These two quite literally invented the word chemistry, and since it's about time for my annual re-watch of the show, of course I had to add Fitz and Olivia to the list. While their first kiss occurred before the first episode technically, their first on-screen kiss was one of the most memorable ever! I rewatch this literally every single year — and their fiery relationship has everything to do with it. If you haven't watched it yet... consider it time.

Charlotte and George from Queen Charlotte

Often dubbed as the best story in the Bridgerton world, Queen Charlotte has one of the best kisses, too! In this show, you truly see how compassion, respect, loyalty, and kindness come together to create a fierce passion for one another that translates so beautifully into Charlotte and George's first kiss. You want to root for them, episode after episode. Can we get another season of this please?!

Dan and Blair from Gossip Girl

Okay hear me out on this...while I love Chuck and Blair (and I really, really do), I happen to think Blair and Dan's relationship is one of the most romantic of the series. Like I said before, I love a good friends-to-lovers arc, and these two are the epitome of that. Well...maybe enemies-to-friends-to-lovers... but still! Their kiss was so unexpectedly romantic.

BTW, you can't even try to convince me that Dan loves Serena as much as he loved Blair — it's not even close.

Fran and Mr. Sheffield from The Nanny

An oldie, but definitely a goodie. With so many seasons of their banter, jealousy, and back-and-forth, Fran and Mr. Sheffield finally get together with a phenomenal first kiss. This was honestly a defining memory for my younger self — these two really showed so much passion, admiration, and love. I just love these two!

Leslie and Ben from Parks and Recreation

I love a grumpy/sunshine trope, and Leslie and Ben deliver all that and then some. I rooted so hard for these two when Ben first entered the scene, but I was totally unsure if they would end up together, because of Leslie's, well...insanely positive attitude and outlook on life. But when they finally kissed and got together? It just made sense! Tiny park forever! (Also fully obsessed with April and Andy in this show too — talk about a slow burn!)

Colin and Penelope from Bridgerton

I couldn't forget yet another classic Bridgertoncouple — especially given that season 3 was one of the most popular yet! While I had mixed feelings on the season as a whole (season 1 really is so hard to beat!), I truly loved Polin's dynamic and how pure the love confessions were. While the first kiss wasn't truly love-filled, it was indeed filled with chemistry — and lots of it!

Pam and Jim from The Office

Oh Jim and Pam. They're a couple that will always be in the history books as one of the best and most romantic TV couples. You can tell from day one how obsessed they are with each other, not just as romantic interests but as besties too. Which is what everyone hopes for in a relationship! As a gal who married her best friend, myself, their first kiss has always been one of my favorites!

Damon and Elena from The Vampire Diaries

One of the most passionate first kisses? It has to be Damon and Elena. Their chemistry was all about passion and lust and love, all at once. Their chemistry was truly undeniable — so much so, that the actors even dated in real life for quite some time! This show definitely did such a good job with this couple, making sure they exuded passion, mystery, and romance at every kiss. Plus, the soundtracks were always 10/10 during those moments, too!

Chandler and Monica from Friends

Gimme all the friends-to-lovers moments, and I'll eat them up every single time! These two were seemingly inevitable — the epitome of end game. We were all convicted it was going to happen at some time, which is why it's so funny to see how shocked all of their friends were when they finally got together. As you can see, this kiss was truly...everything. You can just sense the longing and anticipation between them — so romantic! Needless to say, we miss Matthew Perry big time.

Kurt and Blaine from Glee

I think we all remember exactly where we were when we witnessed the oh-so-romantic first kiss between Blaine and Kurt. From the love confession to the romance, it was all so sweet — a total 10/10 kiss. BRB...going to rewatch every season of Glee immediately just so I can relive this touching moment!

Summer and Seth from The O.C.

Adam Brody making this list twice...ICONIC of him. I shouldn't be surprised though — that man has always oozed charisma and romance since his Gilmore Girlsdays. Seriously though, of course I had to add him to the list for Seth and Summer's first kiss! They'll always be our faves.

Fleabag and Hot Priest from Fleabag

Hot Priest walked so Hot Rabbi could fly... I don't think there is a hotter TV kiss than this one right here! I truly devoured this show, loving every minute of the Hot Priest Fleabag graced us with. When these two kissed, it was so forbidden, so truly insane — and I freaking loved it. I can't even talk about it for too long, because the ending just rips my heart out every time.

Chuck and Blair from Gossip Girl

Since we talked about Dan and Blair, I have to redeem myself and also mention Chuck and Blair — because I really do love them, I swear! Every kiss they shared was so good, and I stand by the fact that no one loved each other as much as these two did. And although I feel bad for Dan, ultimately Chuck and Blair were the best match and they exude pure romance every episode. A 10/10 for me, all around.

Ruby and James from Maxton Hall

I just binged Maxton Hall in one sitting with my husband and OMG...it's so good. Ruby and James' first kiss was one of my favorites I've seen in a while, and it has me dying for a season 2 already! They're already filming, so fingers crossed we get more of their enemies-to-lovers romance soon!

Jane and Guildford from My Lady Jane

This show quickly became an obsession of mine, bringing back true yearning on TV! It's giving "Mr. Darcy hand touch" — and that kiss?! I'll never forgive Amazon Prime for canceling this show. Their romance was widely loved by the masses, so fingers crossed another network will pick up this wildly romantic show ASAP!

Scully and Mulder from The X Files

There's not many shows that you have to wait 7 whole seasons for the main characters to finally get together, but this one really tests your patience in that regard. I mean, talk about a slow burn! This was the longest burn to have ever burned! But when these two finally kissed, it was well worth it to say the least.